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the lament of the ThinkTank
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Jun 14, 2017 15:39
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I desperately want a dev to walkthrough the simulation steps that allow a defenceman to get 49 straight goals without even an accidental secondary assist. For now I'll just pretend that Murphy is one of the game's most prolific breakaway scorers, and the Leafs constantly run a set play that sees him way up the ice behind the D for a stretch pass.
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Jun 14, 2017 15:52
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Pleads posted:I desperately want a dev to walkthrough the simulation steps that allow a defenceman to get 49 straight goals without even an accidental secondary assist. It's more than 49, going back through the playoffs and into last season. Also, I'm surprised how many people have more goals than assists. Especially defensemen. Well, it's EA. Not surprised.
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Jun 14, 2017 15:58
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Hockles posted:It's more than 49, going back through the playoffs and into last season. And yet ThinkTank who seizes up the moment he even hears the word 'pass' has a fairly conventional stat line.
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Jun 14, 2017 16:03
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Hockles posted:Also, I'm surprised how many people have more goals than assists. Especially defensemen. Well, it's EA. Not surprised. Just figured the simulation engine would be immune to that sort of nonsense...
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Jun 14, 2017 16:09
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End of 2021-22 Season Update NHL Awards Stanley Cup Champions Colorado Avalanche Presidents Trophy (Best Regular Season Record) St. Louis Blues Art Ross Trophy (Most Points) Michael Dal Colle -- New York Islanders Hart Memorial Trophy (League MVP) Evgeny Kuznetsov -- Washington Capitals James Norris Memorial Trophy (Best Defenseman) Erik Karlsson -- Ottawa Senators Lady Byng Memorial Trophy (Best Sportsmanship & Gentlemanly Conduct) Nathan MacKinnon -- Colorado Avalanche Calder Memorial Trophy (Rookie of the Year) Quayden Aydin -- Boston Bruins Conn Smythe Trophy (Playoff MVP) Coach Hockles -- Colorado Avalanche Vezina Trophy (Best Goaltender) Aejix Dundee -- Edmonton Oilers William M. Jennings Trophy (Goalie(s) on team with fewest Goals Against) Aejix Dundee -- Edmonton Oilers Bill Masterton Memorial Trophy (Perserverence, Sportsmanship & Dedication to hockey) E. Rasanen -- Montreal Canadiens Frank J. Selke Trophy (Best Defensive Forward) Connor McDavid -- Edmonton Oilers Ted Lindsay Award (League MVP as voted by NHLPA) Evgeny Kuznetsov -- Washington Capitals Maurice "Rocket" Richard Trophy (Most Goals) Soup Athanatos -- Colorado Avalanche Touchdown Thomas -- New York Islanders  AHL Awards Calder Cup (AHL's Stanley Cup) Hartford Wolfpack Macgregor Kilpatrick Trophy (AHL's President's Trophy) Stockton Heat John B. Sollenberger Trophy (Most Regular Season Points) J. Kirkland -- Charlotte Checkers Les Cunningham Award (League MVP) J. Kirkland -- Charlotte Checkers Willie Marshall Award (Most Regular Season Goals) B. Turakov -- Wilkes-Barre/Scranton Penguins Dudley "Red" Garrett Memorial Award (Rookie of the Year) B. Turakov -- Wilkes-Barre/Scranton Penguins Eddie Shore Award (Best Defenseman) A. Tursumbayev -- Utica Comets Aldege "Baz" Bastien Memorial Award (Best Goaltender) S. Skinner -- Syracuse Crunch Jack A. Butterfield Trophy (Playoff MVP) Henrik Lundqvist -- Hartford Wolfpack Fred T. Hunt Memorial Award (Perserverence, Sportsmanship & Dedication to hockey) S. Bucet -- Toronto Maple Leafs Yanick Dupre Memorial Award (Community Involvement) M. Charlebois -- St. John's Ice Caps Harry "Hap" Holmes Memorial Award (Goalie(s) on team with fewest Goals Against) S. Skinner -- Syracuse Crunch Upcoming Free Agents BOS - Quayden Aydin (UFA) BOS - Ewic Windros (UFA) CHI - Jack Bauer (UFA) COL - Aunt Jemima (UFA) COL - Coach Hockles (UFA) DAL - Anders Potetson (UFA) DAL - Potatoes O'Bourke (UFA) DET - Stanley Matthews III (UFA) EDM - Aejix Dundee (UFA) LA -- Taro Tsujimoto (UFA) MTL - Scott Johns (UFA) NJ -- Ogie Ogilthorpe (UFA) PHI - Bubba Biscuits (UFA) PHI - Hugh Jass (UFA) TB -- Yokozuna (UFA) TOR - Aldrig Glomma (UFA) TOR - Gord Murphy (UFA) VAN - Southie Paux (UFA) VAN - Kaido Hoovelson (UFA) WSH - Puck Sonette (UFA) WPG - Mulkku Paskiainen (UFA) Comments The Big 3 bring a Cup to Colorado. Dundee gets all the goalie trophies Hockles was clutch in the Playoffs and gets the Conn Smythe Aydin does win the Calder 21 of the 35 players are expiring this offseason... will they all re-sign with the same team? Is there enough money to go around? http://tinyurl.com/NHL-Create-A-Goon-2017 for complete stats
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Jun 14, 2017 21:49
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congratulations to henrik lundqvist on his first cup
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Jun 14, 2017 22:00
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Please Gord, go somewhere people will pot your rebounds and not get swept by loving Boston.
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Jun 14, 2017 23:35
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2022 Offseason News Notable Retirements Alex Ovechkin Blake Wheeler Shea Weber Patric Hornqvist Ryan Kesler Ryan Suter Brandon Dubinsky Dustin Byfuglien Mats Zuccarello Henrik Lundqvist Jonathan Quick Corey Crawford Full Lists: http://imgur.com/a/1nJLi -- http://imgur.com/a/YLELf -- http://imgur.com/a/AxMnk Transaction News 6/23/22 EDM gets: TJ Oshie & Trevor Lewis LA gets: Cam Talbot & Lars Ledin ARZ gets: Seth Vigilante & Robert Josefsson COL gets: Niklas Hjalmarsson COL gets: Matt Niskanen WSH gets: R. Patterson, K. Hayes, & G. Dufresne BOS - re-signed Quayden Aydin to a $29.5mil/4yr contract BOS - re-signed Ewic Windros to a $9.7mil/2yr contract CHI - re-signed Jack Bauer to a $1.0mil/1yr contract COL - re-signed Aunt Jemima to a $29.6mil/3yr contract DAL - re-signed Anders Potetson to a $1.5mil/1yr contract DAL - re-signed Potatoes O'Bourke to a $5.2mil/2yr contract DET - re-signed Stanley Matthews III to a $1.0mil/1-yr contract MIN -- re-signed Taro Tsujimoto to a $0.755m/1yr 2-way contract MTL - re-signed Scott Johns to a $2.2mil/2yr contract NJ -- re-signed Ogie Ogilthorpe to a $2.2mil/2yr contract PHI - re-signed Bubba Biscuits to a $2.4mil/2yr contract PHI - re-signed Hugh Jass to a $5.2mil/2yr contract TB -- re-signed Yokozuna to a $18.3mil/3yr contract TOR - re-signed Aldrig Glomma to a $1mil/1yr contract TOR - re-signed Gord Murphy to a $13.6mil/2yr contract VAN - re-signed Southie Paux to a $1.0mil/1yr contract VAN - re-signed Kaido Hoovelson to a $2.2mil/2yr contract WSH - re-signed Puck Sonette to a $3.7mil/2yr contract WPG - re-signed Mulkku Paskiainen to a $0.755mil/1yr 2-way contract CBJ - signed UFA Coach Hockles to a $19.2mil/3yr contract MIN - signed UFA Aejix Dundee to a $26.4mil/3yr contract ANA - signed Adam Henrique NSH - signed Marc-Edouard Vlasic CHI - signed Sean Couturier SJ - signed Artemi Panarin NJ - signed Boone Jenner LA - signed Logan Couture 2022-23 Opening Night Info BOS -- Quayden Aydin is a 1st Line FWD BOS -- Ewic Windros is a 2nd Line FWD BOS -- Jus Poost is a 1st Line FWD CAR -- Gord Gordon is a 3rd SCR Line FWD CHI -- assigned Jeremiah ThinkTank to Rockford in the AHL, his role is Other FWD CHI -- Jack Bauer is a Depth FWD COL -- Soup Athanatos is 1st Line FWD COL -- Aunt Jemima is a 2nd Line FWD CBJ -- Coach Hockles is a 2nd Line FWD DAL -- Anders Potetson is a 4th Line FWD DAL -- Potatoes O'Bourke is a Top 6 DEF DET -- Stanley Matthews III is a Depth FWD EDM -- Bavel Bortnik is a Top 2 DEF FLA -- Bernie Sanders is a 2nd Line FWD LA -- Floaty McPylon is a Top 4 DEF MIN -- assigned Taro Tsujimoto to Iowa in the AHL, his role is Other FWD MIN -- Aejix Dundee is an Elite Goalie MTL -- assigned Scott Johns to St. John's in the AHL, his role is 4th Line FWD MTL -- Cruz McBroozer is a 3rd CHK Line FWD NSH -- Guy Fieri is a Depth FWD NJ -- assigned Ogie Ogilthorpe III to Albany in the AHL, his role is 4th Line FWD NJ -- assigned Miracle Johnson to Albany in the AHL, his role is 4th Line FWD NJ -- Danny Provolone is a Top 6 DEF NYI -- Nippon Ichi is a 4th Line FWD NYI -- Touchdown Thomas is a 1st Line FWD PHI -- assigned Stabby McStabson to Lehigh Valley in the AHL, his role is Depth FWD PHI -- Bubba Biscuits is a 4th Line FWD PHI -- Hugh Jass is a Top 4 DEF TB -- Yokozuna is an Elite Goalie TOR -- assigned Aldrig Glomma to Toronto in the AHL, his role is 4th Line FWD TOR -- Gord Murphy is a Top 2 DEF VAN -- Southie Paux is a 3rd SCR Line FWD VAN -- Kaido Hoovelson is a Top 6 DEF WSH -- Puck Sonette is a 3rd CHK Line FWD WPG -- Mulkku Paskiainen is a Backup Goalie Comments Hockles and Dundee find new homes in free agency Bortnik is on the trading block Minnesota only has 4 centers in their organization... Bauer and Hoovelson start the season in the NHL
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Jun 15, 2017 05:33
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Oh look, we beat Washington so badly in the cup finals Ovechkin retired in shame.  Hockles posted:COL - re-signed Aunt Jemima to a $29.6mil/3yr contract Ain't no contract like a "we just won the cup" contract.  Sorry Hockles I took all your money. But also Hockles posted:
How many reloads did that take aunt jenkins fucked around with this message at 06:01 on Jun 15, 2017 |
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Jun 15, 2017 05:57
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CBJ
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aunt jemima posted:Sorry Hockles I took all your money. You did take all the money. Also 0 reloads.
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Jun 15, 2017 06:18
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Hockles posted:[ Good to see that the Habs are run just like real life. But I mean, hey, money is good.
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Jun 15, 2017 07:12
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Hockles posted:NHL Awards[/b][/u] Good poo poo boys. Gotta get that back-to-back. Hockles posted:COL - re-signed Aunt Jemima to a $29.6mil/3yr contract MONEY FORT FIGHT (Can I borrow 100k?) Hockles posted:2022-23 Opening Night Info Guess you can use all that time while I start the game to count your money. Hockles posted:CBJ - signed UFA Coach Hockles to a $19.2mil/3yr contract You're loving dead to me.
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Jun 15, 2017 08:28
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Jun 15, 2017 12:23
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McBroozer is up to the 3rd line baby! Checkin' line! Like the good lort indeded
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Jun 15, 2017 14:44
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Even videogames hate on Ovie. 
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Jun 15, 2017 14:50
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is one of those 4 centres in minnesota taro tsujimoto, ahl scrubstar?
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Jun 15, 2017 14:53
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Hockles posted:EDM -- Bavel Bortnik is a Top 2 DEF why you have to toy with bavel heart like this? 
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Jun 15, 2017 15:34
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fits posted:is one of those 4 centres in minnesota taro tsujimoto, ahl scrubstar? Yes. 2 in the NHL, 2 in the AHL. Taro is in the AHL.
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Jun 15, 2017 15:56
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Athanatos posted:Guess you can use all that time while I start the game to count your money. Check the TOI tho 
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Jun 15, 2017 16:19
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aunt jemima posted:Check the TOI tho Start the game then head off to sign all the autographs the fans want
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Jun 15, 2017 17:26
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how am i even worth 1.1m
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Jun 15, 2017 18:09
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I'm surprised I'm making a million. I'll take it.
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Jun 18, 2017 01:36
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2023 All-Star Break Update  All-Stars Pacific - Floaty McPylon (1st selection) Central - Soup Athanatos (2nd selection) Central - Aunt Jemima (3rd selection) Atlantic - Quayden Aydin (1st selection) Atlantic - Jus Poost (3rd selection) Atlantic - Gord Murphy (3rd selection) Metropolitan - Touchdown Thomas (3rd selection) Central (AHL) - Taro Tsujimoto (1st selection) North (AHL) - Scott Johns (1st selection) North (AHL) - Miracle Johnson (1st selection) Transaction News 11/7/22 - PHI called up Stabby McStabson from LV 11/29/22 - VAN sent down Kaido Hoovelson to UTI Notable Stats Thomas leads the NHL in points, Poost is 2nd, Thomas leads the NHL in goals, Athanatos is 2nd, Poost is 3rd Murphy is 2nd in the NHL in +/-, Athanatos is 4th Biscuits is 3rd in PIM, O'Bourke is 4th, Provolone is 5th Ogilthorpe leads the AHL in PIM, Glomma is 3rd, Johns is 4th Comments Lots of goon all-stars this year Thomas and Poost are having better than average years Hoovelson's NHL statline for this season is kind of depressing Only 4 more players left to make it to the NHL http://tinyurl.com/NHL-Create-A-Goon-2017 for complete stats
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Jun 19, 2017 04:08
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I get invite to All-Star Game. Teammates say I get money if I win! Фантастычны! Pylon score all goals and get big check!
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Jun 19, 2017 05:09
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Still a point-per-game player, albeit with over 2 minutes less ice time. Also my lowest pim/game since coming into the league. So even more efficient! Earning that contract 
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Jun 19, 2017 05:33
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Attaboy Bubba, that's a far more acceptable penalty rate. Keep up the good work!
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Jun 19, 2017 07:21
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Hockles posted:Hoovelson's NHL statline for this season is kind of depressing oh for fucks sake
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Jun 19, 2017 15:36
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Is 13 penalty minutes a typo or did Miracle Johnson suddenly assume a vow of pacifism
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Jun 19, 2017 20:29
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I had higher aspirations for Gord Gordon, but with a name like that, you're practically begging to be a 3rd line centre.
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Jun 19, 2017 21:14
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Agent Jack Bauer is starting his NHL career off strong! 27 points in 46 games getting bottom six minutes. He's gonna break out soon!
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Jun 19, 2017 21:28
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loving Jack Capuano, get Nippon off the 4th line you caveman. 
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Jun 20, 2017 01:57
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End of 2022-23 Regular Season Update  Transaction News 2/17/23 CHI gets: R. Crawford, M. Heikkinen, & 2023 3rd Round Pick VAN gets: Jack Bauer 2/20/23 BUF gets: Stanley Matthews III DET gets: G. Delisle & E. Jenner 3/1/23 BOS gets: Michael Grabner, 2024 1st Round Pick NYR gets: Ewic Windros, 2023 4th Round Pick 4/17/23 - VAN called up Kaido Hoovelson from UTI Notable Stats Thomas finished 3rd in the NHL in Points, Poost finished 5th Thomas lead the NHL in goals, Athanatos was 2nd, Poost was 4th, Murphy was 5th Athanatos lead the NHL in +/- Biscuits finished 2nd in PIM, O'Bourke was 3rd Murphy played the 2nd most MIN in the NHL Johnson finished 5th in the AHL in goals Ogilthorpe lead the AHL in PIM, Glomma was 2nd, Johns was 3rd Comments Yet another few goons dealt around the trade deadline! Hoovelson gets called up just in time for the Canucks' cup run http://tinyurl.com/NHL-Create-A-Goon-2017 for complete stats Hockles fucked around with this message at 21:59 on Jun 20, 2017 |
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Jun 20, 2017 03:00
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Hockles posted:Biscuits finished 2nd in PIM, O'Bourke was 3rd There you go Bubbers, for probably the first time in your life I'm proud of you. Keep up the good work and we'll be the top goon in no time!
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Jun 20, 2017 04:25
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Goddamn Atlantic division!!!
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Jun 20, 2017 06:11
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The spreadsheet only lists 50 games?
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Jun 20, 2017 13:25
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Schlesische posted:The spreadsheet only lists 50 games? Whoops. There's like 4 buttons I need to click to update the spreadsheet. I guess I only hit 3. I have the playoffs updated preloaded, so I'll update it all when I get home.
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Jun 20, 2017 14:00
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Was ThinkTank hurt most of the year or scratched? If the latter, I take it his career his effectively over?
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Jun 20, 2017 15:02
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ThinkTank posted:Was ThinkTank hurt most of the year or scratched? If the latter, I take it his career his effectively over? The spreadsheet is still showing the stats up to the ASG.
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Jun 20, 2017 15:19
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yokozuna is putting up respectable, if not flashy numbers he's a total lunchpail player, ie. he brings a lunchpail out to the net
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Jun 20, 2017 16:02
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