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loquacius posted:fast ejac goon have you considered getting beefy, bitch?
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# ? Jun 18, 2017 23:17 |
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# ? May 10, 2024 09:12 |
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Premature ejaculation dude and his girlfriend should calm down and accept that sex is about so much more than sticking it in. His issue with cumming quickly is not a death sentence. Thinking vaginal sex is solely the most important is a real common trap heterosexual couples fall into. Spend much more time on all kinds of foreplay, including toys. Be creative. Make sure your girl enjoys herself considerably before putting it in her. There's countless extremely enjoyable options before, after, and during the "main act" that will keep it going for both of you. Just keep cool, dude.
Cough Drop The Beat fucked around with this message at 23:29 on Jun 18, 2017 |
# ? Jun 18, 2017 23:27 |
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My non anonymous confession is that y'all should stop calling out obviously fake confessions, because if you keep shaming the English majors then eventually we're just gonna be left with sad brain posts and relationship problems, and at that point we might as well move the thread to E/N My second non anonymous confession is that I have no soul and give no shits about anyone's problems except my own
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# ? Jun 18, 2017 23:32 |
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maskenfreiheit posted:better yet pee while loving I thought that was how sex was done when I was a little kid until I found out what really happens. 😦
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 00:15 |
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Cough Drop The Beat posted:Premature ejaculation dude and his girlfriend should calm down and accept that sex is about so much more than sticking it in. His issue with cumming quickly is not a death sentence. Thinking vaginal sex is solely the most important is a real common trap heterosexual couples fall into. Spend much more time on all kinds of foreplay, including toys. Be creative. Make sure your girl enjoys herself considerably before putting it in her. There's countless extremely enjoyable options before, after, and during the "main act" that will keep it going for both of you. Just keep cool, dude. I'll also say I'm skeptical whether it's helpful at all to tell people they care about the wrong things, but more foreplay is always a fine idea for all involved, so I can't really argue that much. I've heard that being on the receiving end of foreplay (HJ/BJ/whatever you're into) actually helps with premature ejaculation, because being more revved up and "into it" makes you less likely to be stuck in your own head worrying about your performance, even though the conventional wisdom is that any stimulation a guy receives is automatically that much less sex he will be able to have before blowing. It's not as simple as filling up your SEX bar until you reach the NUT mark.
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 00:15 |
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think of gross stuff to stop the train
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 00:28 |
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Feels like I'm wearing Nuthin at all Nuthin at all Nuthin at all...
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 00:33 |
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Baseball, cold showers
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 00:33 |
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 01:17 |
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quote:My girlfriend has quite a fluffy face, with fine white hairs on her cheeks. It bugs the hell out of me and I can't stop fixating on them. I brought it up a few times (gently) and it ends up upsetting her massively and the conversation shuts down. She has issues with self-esteem so I don't dare push it any further. She says there's nothing she can do about them. 3 seconds with my shaver would sort it out. She probably doesn't want to get into a routine where shaving her face like a dude is just something she has to do every day. I think certain spa treatments handle waxing hair like that (more often it's ladystaches than whiskers); maybe find an excuse to set her up with a spa day? quote:Apologies in advance, this is going to be long and maybe rambling because I'm still processing a lot of stuff. I enjoyed this one
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 02:27 |
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See even if fake that's the sort of interesting real poo poo that could, implausible though it may be, actually occur.
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 02:33 |
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Bearded girlfriend goon. Don't offer your shaver, but there is other stuff like Nair, and Veet. Uncle dad goon, if your uncle dad was such a gently caress up, your mom would probably be embarrassed to talk about how he boned her, so don't press the issue.
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 02:37 |
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Herf a derf posted:My girlfriend has quite a fluffy face, with fine white hairs on her cheeks. Glue on whiskers, rent her out to people with a catgirl fetish. Derf a herf posted:Andy, you were always my favorite nephew. The fact that this appears on Father's Day makes it a mite suspicious. If it is true, I actually picture Frank having a grudge against his brother and deciding to gently caress him over from beyond the grave.
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 02:45 |
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To me the most unbelievable part of this story is the mom jumping from one brother to another while either pregnant or single-parenting the goon. Like I know love and hormones can't be controlled but I'm pretty sure I couldn't handle watching my brother raise my kid, and I really doubt I'd ever look at my brothers girlfriend (any of them) and go "yeah that's a good idea, this won't strain my family relationships at all" but I also understand that sometimes in small towns or communities, there are literally only so many people in an age group. Or for that matter raise my brothers kid while he hangs around playing cool uncle instead of taking responsibility. Like all 3 parents here sound kinda "uhhhhhhhhh"
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 02:58 |
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Bust Rodd posted:Goon look in the mirror for two minutes every day and making dead sober eye contact with yourself manifest a lead loving singer of an erection (NO HANDS ONLY UR MIND) and say "I AM THE CASANOVA! I AM PETER loving NORTH! I AM SINGER/SONGWRITER AND TANTRIC SEX GOD STING!" EVERY MORNING I WAKE UP AND OPEN PALM SLAM A VHS INTO THE SLOT. IT’S PETER NORTH'S A SLUT IS BORN 17 AND RIGHT THEN AND THERE I START DOING THE MOVES ALONGSIDE WITH THE MAIN CHARACTER, PETER NORTH. I DO EVERY MOVE AND I DO EVERY MOVE HARD. MAKIN GROANING SOUNDS WHEN I POP A BONER OR EVEN WHEN I MESS UP TECHNIQUE. NOT MANY CAN SAY THEY WATCHED AN ENTIRE VHS OF PORNOGRAPHY. I CAN. I SAY IT AND I SAY IT OUTLOUD EVERYDAY TO PEOPLE IN MY COLLEGE CLASS AND ALL THEY DO IS PROVE PEOPLE IN COLLEGE CLASS CAN STILL BE IMMATURE JEKRS. AND IVE LEARNED ALL THE GRUNTS AND IVE LEARNED HOW TO MAKE MYSELF AND MY APARTMENT LESS LONELY BY SHOUTING EM ALL. 2 HOURS INCLUDING WIND DOWN EVERY MORNIng
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 03:11 |
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maskenfreiheit posted:better yet pee while loving Why did the condom leave early? it got pissed off
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 03:56 |
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Bust Rodd posted:To me the most unbelievable part of this story is the mom jumping from one brother to another while either pregnant or single-parenting the goon. Like I know love and hormones can't be controlled but I'm pretty sure I couldn't handle watching my brother raise my kid, and I really doubt I'd ever look at my brothers girlfriend (any of them) and go "yeah that's a good idea, this won't strain my family relationships at all" but I also understand that sometimes in small towns or communities, there are literally only so many people in an age group. You know the end of Forest Gump [the movie] and Forest is like 'is he, my son, like.....' and he's gesturing towards himself quietly, and the Doctor is like 'nah your kid is an average kid, not developmentally delayed or disabled.' Sometimes there is a moment of clarity of knowing that you're a loving idiot who'd make a poo poo parent and would let someone else raise your kid because you know you'd do a poo poo job at it. Or there's some massive amounts of mental health / self esteem thing going on. Probably definitely so with the suicide.
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 05:19 |
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Gynovore posted:The fact that this appears on Father's Day makes it a mite suspicious. If it is true, I actually picture Frank having a grudge against his brother and deciding to gently caress him over from beyond the grave. Uh you know that confessions are posted by OP and this was probably just a coincidence that it was posted on father's day right
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 12:50 |
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Yeah, he always says there's a back log, so unless we caught up I doubt it was sent that day. Like the Predators gambler guy was posted a week or two after they had sent it in.
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 14:04 |
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Yeah that one was sent in on the 13thquote:I was very nearly busted by Chris Hansen on "To Catch a Predator". quote:I'm not a good driver. My fiancee and I were driving in rural Pennsylvania this weekend en route to Columbus Ohio. We got off on an exit to get gas and food and I got stuck in 2 roundabouts. I didn't even realize they were a thing, but here were 2 connected roundabouts. poo poo man, they make double rotaries, that's hosed-up this sounds like a nightmare scenario really
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 15:02 |
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Just come to Europe fam, 16 is legal basically everywhere
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 15:03 |
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At least you weren't in Europe https://youtu.be/6OGvj7GZSIo
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 15:07 |
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Come to think of it I think 16 is legal in most US states too. I heard a lot of people on that show ended up walking even when they were actively perving on a 12-year-old rather than struggling with an attraction to someone over the age of consent. He'd probably have ended up really embarrassed but not in prison.
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 15:08 |
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Zzulu posted:Just come to Europe fam, 16 is legal basically everywhere But on the other hand there are also rotaries everywhere
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 15:32 |
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I'm conflicted on TCAP since at no time is the person actually talking to an actual underage person. While the people featured are definitely up to no good, they sure don't appear to be committing any actual crimes. Everyone involved is pretty much scum.
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 15:33 |
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Nocheez posted:I'm conflicted on TCAP since at no time is the person actually talking to an actual underage person. While the people featured are definitely up to no good, they sure don't appear to be committing any actual crimes. Everyone involved is pretty much scum. No, stop. We don't need to discuss the ethics of trying to gently caress children.
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 15:50 |
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Don't we? Maybe some people were just born with these sorts of inclinations. Maybe some people can't HELP IT. e: In case it wasn't clear, I'm talking about the inclination to discuss things better left way alone.
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 16:16 |
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bradzilla posted:
Have a seat over here.
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 16:39 |
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Nocheez posted:I'm conflicted on TCAP since at no time is the person actually talking to an actual underage person. While the people featured are definitely up to no good, they sure don't appear to be committing any actual crimes. Everyone involved is pretty much scum. Similarly, people who try to hire hitmen but are actually talking to cops have done nothing wrong and action should only be taken after someone has been murdered or molested.
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 17:06 |
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Improbable Lobster posted:Similarly, people who try to hire hitmen but are actually talking to cops have done nothing wrong and action should only be taken after someone has been murdered or molested. This but unironically
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 17:10 |
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Nocheez posted:I'm conflicted on TCAP since at no time is the person actually talking to an actual underage person. While the people featured are definitely up to no good, they sure don't appear to be committing any actual crimes. Everyone involved is pretty much scum. I'm not sure how you can feel bad for them though considering you know for a fact if the kid they were meeting was underage and chris hansen wasn't there, they definitely would commit the crime they came there fully intending to do. Why do you think they are bringing condoms? To do a balloon show for the kid?
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 17:16 |
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Hey man, they always say they're just swinging by to check in on them because they're underage and they're worried about them. If you can't trust a 50 year old on the internet sending a 12 year old dick pics, then who can you trust?
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 17:35 |
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it's super hosed up to make a TV show about it
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 17:38 |
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True, but if they made a show about people putting down the minimum dollar amount they'd have to be paid to eat some sort of disgusting live creature and then the person with the lowest bid had to actually do it, I'd watch it. And that's pretty hosed up too.
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 17:40 |
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Solice Kirsk posted:True, but if they made a show about people putting down the minimum dollar amount they'd have to be paid to eat some sort of disgusting live creature and then the person with the lowest bid had to actually do it, I'd watch it. And that's pretty hosed up too. Wasn't this basically Fear Factor?
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 17:47 |
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limp_cheese posted:Wasn't this basically Fear Factor? If by "sea creature" you mean "horse cock" Also, it's coming back with Luda as host
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 18:51 |
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Didn't we have a goon in some earlier confession thread who was actually on to catch a predator? I can clearly remember a story like that.
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 19:01 |
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limp_cheese posted:Wasn't this basically Fear Factor? Sort of, but I would call it "Eat Bugs and Other Small Wiggly Stuff on TV."
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 19:23 |
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Police Automaton posted:Didn't we have a goon in some earlier confession thread who was actually on to catch a predator? I can clearly remember a story like that. turn on your monitor
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 19:52 |
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# ? May 10, 2024 09:12 |
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yeah I eat rear end posted:I'm not sure how you can feel bad for them though considering you know for a fact if the kid they were meeting was underage and chris hansen wasn't there, they definitely would commit the crime they came there fully intending to do. Why do you think they are bringing condoms? To do a balloon show for the kid? What part of my post said I felt bad for them? I said it doesn't appear that an actual crime was committed and everyone involved seems scummy.
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# ? Jun 19, 2017 20:46 |