|
Quantum of Phallus posted:Ok it's just over. So does Bumblebee kill Hitler or what?
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 13:10
|
|
|
|
| # ? Jun 6, 2024 12:55 |
|
|
Quantum of Phallus posted:Ok it's just over. Give me one of the worst moments.
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 13:12
|
|
|
Soup du Journey posted:whats with the arthurian legend stuff in there? why were there robots around for that? is excalibur secretly not a sword and actually a key that turns off the doomsday device or something? Yes I also wish to know why there are swords, and specifically, why does Marky Mark get one?
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 13:16
|
|
|
Big robots without personalities punch other big robots with no personalities and then Marky Walhherbg (who has no personality) does uninteresting stuff
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 13:16
|
|
|
are there still racist caricaturebots in the franchise? cause they could totally do a muslim carbot with all the stuff going on in london lately
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 13:24
|
|
|
if there were transformers around in the mythical days of king arthur, what did they transform into? horse-drawn carts and trebuchets?
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 13:48
|
|
|
Jonas Albrecht posted:Give me one of the worst moments. Would have to look over my notes to pick a specific moment but a few stand out: An evil robot with a "black" voice (and also wearing a chain) is released from robot prison and repeats the Martin Luther King "Free at last" speech. A good robot kicks a fish to death.
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 14:28
|
|
|
LordArgh posted:if there were transformers around in the mythical days of king arthur, what did they transform into? horse-drawn carts and trebuchets? Dragons and mythological monsters. Ogres, giants, trolls etc This will all be explained in Transformers 8: Lets get medieval
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 14:29
|
|
|
The mythological stuff is generally incomprehensible. It pops up at the start for a bit and then again about 90 minutes in. It really feels like they bolted two movies together and made one giant loving mess.
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 14:31
|
|
|
But why does Marky Mark have a sword? DO WE SEE HIS BALLSACK?!?
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 14:43
|
|
|
Quantum of Phallus posted:
I'm sure CineD thinks this is Oscar-worthy
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 14:54
|
|
|
WampaLord posted:But why does Marky Mark have a sword? He's the chosen one!!!!! A dying transformers gives him a talisman that transforms into a sword. That's it. It's used maybe... once in the entire film.
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 14:56
|
|
|
What does the woman do?
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 14:56
|
|
|
Zzulu posted:What does the woman do? She's the last descendant of merlin and mainly just stands around showing lots of cleavage. The first time we see her she's debunking old myths about dragons and stuff despite living in a world where Transformers seem to have taken over America (but not the rest of the world???? Oh Cairo and Hong Kong get totally destroyed and it's never mentioned again.
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 15:00
|
|
|
sounds more like Malarky Mark
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 15:05
|
|
|
It also does this insanely annoying thing where, at least in IMAX anyway, it changes aspect ratio every few seconds.
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 15:08
|
|
|
Quantum of Phallus posted:Hong Kong gets totally destroyed Well that's certainly one way to appeal to China... 
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 15:12
|
|
|
Quantum of Phallus posted:She's the last descendant of merlin and mainly just stands around showing lots of cleavage. Yeah obviously the autobots only want to hang out with the cool humans.
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 15:14
|
|
|
LordArgh posted:if there were transformers around in the mythical days of king arthur, what did they transform into? horse-drawn carts and trebuchets? A dragon
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 16:13
|
|
|
Quantum of Phallus posted:A dragon gently caress movies
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 16:17
|
|
|
Raserys posted:gently caress movies
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 17:24
|
|
|
why do transformers transform, anyway? isn't it to blend in or something? how many dragons and krakens were around in ye olden days??
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 17:24
|
|
|
Where does it get off being 2.5 hours? jfc
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 17:40
|
|
|
Soup du Journey posted:why do transformers transform, anyway? isn't it to blend in or something? Man, if I were a giant robot, gently caress blending in, I'd own that poo poo. Edit: REMEMBER ME
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 17:43
|
|
|
Saw the Mummy the other day Feels kind of goofy in a bad way and I can't explain why. I keep thinking back to Mike's comment that it was made for foreign audiences. Like it has the same kind of dialogue and humor a kung fu comedy would have? I don't know. When I tried explaining that to the person I went with I think they thought I was being racist. Best part of the film: "Kick her rear end, Nick!"
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 17:56
|
|
|
honestly I don't feel like Terry, the original poser of the cined Transformers thing, deserves poo poo for it. They never had the Cined fragility or desperation, and never attempted to make a cult. Some others did on his behalf, there are some REALLY bizarre and hateful fights in that that thread like one guy who was calling the other a brain damaged baby (changing someone's quote to "  " and saying all sorts of "it's adorable how retarded you are" fake cooing, cringey as HELL). Like, I still never watched Pain and Gain because of how Cined talked about it. That RLM's review of it was some kind of BETRAYAL instead of just their own opinion. It was loving nuts how people talked about it. But Terry themself was always humble, actually illustrated their points, never talked down to anyone, even watches other movies and does other things besides watch movies. Like, they never even watched Transformers 4 or make a bunch of other billion dollar movie reviews and barely posts anymore. They're not trying to be forums popular. I'm kind of onboard with the ideas because there's a bizarre kind of hatefulness coming off from the movies and the heroes get progressively shittier and shittier and stop even trying to make token efforts to look heroic. I think it's all an interesting idea and I wish more people would read movies like that but not start crying like SMG does if you disagree. I don't think it makes them great movies or even good movies to watch. But apparently everyone on cined wants to be EXACTLY like SMG, including his lovely attitude that gets him probated everywhere else even though he holds no power anywhere but a dead gay forum E: I realized I don't actually know Terry's pronouns, painstakingly changed them, I don't think Terry's ever gotten mad at pronouns but still just trying to be respectful Hemingway To Go! fucked around with this message at 18:09 on Jun 19, 2017 |
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 18:03
|
|
|
vermin posted:Saw the Mummy the other day Makes sense what with Mike being a huge racist and all.
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 18:03
|
|
|
Hemingway To Go! posted:honestly I don't feel like Terry, the original poser of the cined Transformers thing, deserves poo poo for it. Exactly.
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 18:04
|
|
|
Captain Lavender posted:Where does it get off being 2.5 hours? jfc Seriously, the loving gall of it. What puzzles me is, do people actually want these long movies? Everything's so market researched that it must be the case but I can't imagine most people wanting to sit through popcorn movies this long. Is it the Chinese? Do they just love long movies for some reason? idgi
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 18:06
|
|
|
why don't the decepticons kidnap important people, transform into looking like them to deceive humans and then rule the world from the shadows like the reptilians are doing irl?
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 18:07
|
|
|
LordArgh posted:why don't the decepticons kidnap important people, transform into looking like them to deceive humans and then rule the world from the shadows like the reptilians are doing irl? Why didn't they teach astronauts how to drill
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 18:10
|
|
|
Movies were originally the length the average person could comfortably not pee. 2.5 hours is doable for a lot of people but at that length you're going to have a pretty significant portion of your audience pop out for a pee break and miss 5 min or so of the movie. A lot of plays and operas are that length and will almost always have an intermission because of it. I refuse to see really long movies in theatre. Everyone should refuse to see transformers though. But that's the sort of movie where a pee break won't harm anything. There's no plot and it's just a tornado of metal parts and explosions. There's even a website for movies that has recommended pee-break times, they find lovely parts of the movies that if you're gone for 5 min you won't really miss anything good.
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 18:10
|
|
|
HoAssHo posted:Seriously, the loving gall of it. I wonder if it's because theaters are a break from the smog and heat, so they want longer movies, particularly for summer movies.
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 18:11
|
|
|
One of the best movies in recent history is Krampus. Establish likable and unlikable characters, everyone gets an arc, three acts, fun twist, plenty of jokes, fun action, 90 minutes. Transformers costs $350M to make and I defy you to tell me that a character has an arc, or that you were entertained by the action. The horror movie is less grim than the robotpunch movie. The horror movie has infinitely better writing, action, sound design, character development, cinematography, acting, production design, costuming, set design, etc. I don't know how you don't die of embarrassment if you made or enjoyed a Transformers movie.
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 18:15
|
|
|
Baronjutter posted:just a tornado of metal parts and explosions.. You said it buddy The movie feels like a CG artist's showreel
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 18:15
|
|
|
HoAssHo posted:Seriously, the loving gall of it. I know several people who go the other way and if a movie is over 90 minutes, forget it. For me it varies movie to movies, some 2+ hour movies fly by and other 80 minute ones drag. There's no way I would want to submit myself to the sensory beatdown that is a transformers movie for that long, however.
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 18:15
|
|
|
A GLISTENING HODOR posted:One of the best movies in recent history is Krampus. It's hard to be embarrassed if your movie is making giant rear end-loads of money.
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 18:17
|
|
|
Quantum of Phallus posted:You said it buddy The difference between The Amazing Bulk and Transformers is money
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 18:19
|
|
|
A GLISTENING HODOR posted:One of the best movies in recent history is Krampus. Eh, Krampus didn't go far enough though. It was like a horror movie for tweens or something. It didn't help that the final reveal of Krampus was a character whose face didn't move whatsoever since they apparently didn't have the budget for animatronics underneath the rubber.
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 18:21
|
|
|
|
| # ? Jun 6, 2024 12:55 |
|
|
this seems like a good time to rewatch this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Rfup0XKx7o
|
|
#
?
Jun 19, 2017 18:22
|
|