NFL June N/V: My name is also Kombucha Violation

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Football Funhouse > NFL June N/V: My name is also Kombucha Violation

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wandler20: Nov 13, 2002; How many Championships?

Demon Of The Fall posted:

I wonder what Marcus is gonna get when his rookie deal runs out. Do you pay him 125m like Carr?

I've been wondering the same about Jameis.

# ? Jun 22, 2017 20:04

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# ? May 9, 2024 22:05

fsif: Jul 18, 2003

https://twitter.com/68INCOGNITO/status/877968298620575744

You tell "them", Richie.

# ? Jun 22, 2017 20:17

SKULL.GIF: Jan 20, 2017

Demon Of The Fall posted:

I wonder what Marcus is gonna get when his rookie deal runs out. Do you pay him 125m like Carr?

Probably yeah

# ? Jun 22, 2017 20:18

Ehud: Sep 19, 2003; football.

fsif posted:

https://twitter.com/68INCOGNITO/status/877968298620575744

You tell "them", Richie.

also because he's a legit psychopath

# ? Jun 22, 2017 20:22

Impossibly Perfect Sphere: Nov 6, 2002; They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!

fsif posted:

https://twitter.com/68INCOGNITO/status/877968298620575744

You tell "them", Richie.

That reminds me of this story about Jonathon Martin I recently came across.

http://ftw.usatoday.com/2016/05/the-quiet-redemption-of-jonathan-martin

# ? Jun 22, 2017 20:22

AggressivelyStupid: Jan 9, 2012

fsif posted:

https://twitter.com/68INCOGNITO/status/877968298620575744

You tell "them", Richie.

"They" stands for black people here, yeah?

# ? Jun 22, 2017 20:34

WHOOPS: Nov 6, 2009

Watching Randy Moss' rookie season highlights, it really stands out how good Moss was at adjusting to the ball from the moment he hit the NFL. Also I don't know why that last TD grab against the Oilers doesn't show up in more highlights, just from how easy he made it look.

# ? Jun 22, 2017 20:47

fsif: Jul 18, 2003

https://twitter.com/greggrosenthal/status/877981839834599424

:raise:

# ? Jun 22, 2017 21:11

FizFashizzle: Mar 30, 2005

Chiefs reacted to the news of Carr's contract by extending andy reid

fsif posted:

https://twitter.com/greggrosenthal/status/877981839834599424

oh god he won a power struggle we've seen this movie before

# ? Jun 22, 2017 21:11

Impossibly Perfect Sphere: Nov 6, 2002; They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!

I wonder who decided to release Maclin.

https://twitter.com/MikeGarafolo/status/877982072681504768

# ? Jun 22, 2017 21:17

Diva Cupcake: Aug 15, 2005

So does this mean he takes over for Ted Thompson?

# ? Jun 22, 2017 21:18

Pron on VHS: Nov 14, 2005; Blood Clots
Sweat Dries
Bones Heal
Suck it Up and Keep Wrestling

Hmm firing our GM hours after signing Reid to a contract extension...

# ? Jun 22, 2017 21:18

Grittybeard: Mar 29, 2010; Bad, very bad!

fsif posted:

https://twitter.com/greggrosenthal/status/877981839834599424

Weird. He has the team in a little bit of cap hell but from all other indications he's done a hell of a job.

gently caress the Colts for (rightfully) firing Ryan Grigson and poaching Chris Ballard.

# ? Jun 22, 2017 21:20

Pron on VHS: Nov 14, 2005; Blood Clots
Sweat Dries
Bones Heal
Suck it Up and Keep Wrestling

Our last GM Pioli was too bad at personnel evaluation but a wizard at cap management, Dorsey is a great talent evaluator but has had KC in cap hell for years, why can't we just split the job in between 2 dudes

# ? Jun 22, 2017 21:21

Grittybeard: Mar 29, 2010; Bad, very bad!

I don't know whether to be happy or sad that Frank Zombo no longer has a guaranteed roster spot.

The obvious speculation is that the way Dorsey handled the Maclin thing pissed Reid off a lot I guess?

# ? Jun 22, 2017 21:24

Blitz of 404 Error: Sep 19, 2007; Joe Biden is a top 15 president

Guy on reddit who called the firing this morning

quote:

alright so heres why:

Clark is really conservative with the cap and does not like being up against it at all. With Dorsey literally living on the edge when it comes to the salary cap, Clark was fed up. Just not his philosophy. He's a helluva talent evaluator but just wasnt a fit. We didnt even have enough money to sign our draft picks before we cut Mac. Not to mention all of the extensions we've had players sign are backloaded so its not getting better any time soon. I think Clark has been wanting to can him all offseason but wanted to take advantage of his drafting ability first.

# ? Jun 22, 2017 21:29

Eltoasto: Aug 26, 2002; We come spinning out of nothingness, scattering stars like dust.

Glad we got Ballard when we did!

# ? Jun 22, 2017 21:30

Grittybeard: Mar 29, 2010; Bad, very bad!

If that's the case you fire him before the Colts hire Ballard, unless he just thinks Dorsey's stink is on Ballard too.

# ? Jun 22, 2017 21:30

Hot Diggity!: Apr 3, 2010; SKELITON_BRINGING_U_ON.GIF

Diva Cupcake posted:

So does this mean he takes over for Ted Thompson?

Wouldn't be too surprised tbh

Eliot Wolf is still probably next in line though

# ? Jun 22, 2017 21:33

pubic works project: Jan 28, 2005; No Decepticon in history, and I say this with great surety, has been treated worse or more unfairly.

Grittybeard posted:

gently caress the Colts for (rightfully) firing Ryan Grigson and poaching Chris Ballard.

Mwahahahahahaha!

# ? Jun 22, 2017 21:33

FizFashizzle: Mar 30, 2005

I wouldn't be surprised at all if he somehow ended up in Atlanta like Pioli did.

Blank loves acquiring front office people and making up titles for them.

# ? Jun 22, 2017 21:38

Parmesan Basil: Nov 12, 2008; TIME IS THE FIRE IN WHICH WE BURN THE GAME CLOCK

gently caress football now and forever but I'm very happy to drop back in and say "gently caress you John Dorsey. Go drop two seconds on the Worst QB in the league in hell you dumb piece of poo poo rapist defender."

#FireTyreekHill next.

# ? Jun 22, 2017 21:38

Pops Mgee: Aug 20, 2009; People all over the world,
Join Hands,
Start the Love Train!

Parmesan Basil posted:

gently caress football now and forever but I'm very happy to drop back in and say "gently caress you John Dorsey. Go drop two seconds on the Worst QB in the league in hell you dumb piece of poo poo rapist defender."

#FireTyreekHill next.

He is risen!

# ? Jun 22, 2017 21:40

Blitz of 404 Error: Sep 19, 2007; Joe Biden is a top 15 president

Parmesan Basil posted:

gently caress football now and forever but I'm very happy to drop back in and say "gently caress you John Dorsey. Go drop two seconds on the Worst QB in the league in hell you dumb piece of poo poo rapist defender."

#FireTyreekHill next.

Lol

# ? Jun 22, 2017 21:40

Impossibly Perfect Sphere: Nov 6, 2002; They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!

Don't pay attention to him. It only makes him stronger.

# ? Jun 22, 2017 21:40

Gumbel2Gumbel: Apr 28, 2010

I told you we should have cut his head off and burned the body

# ? Jun 22, 2017 21:41

Nissin Cup Nudist: Sep 3, 2011; Sleep with one eye open

We're off to Gritty Gritty land

Parmesan Basil posted:

gently caress football now and forever but I'm very happy to drop back in and say "gently caress you John Dorsey. Go drop two seconds on the Worst QB in the league in hell you dumb piece of poo poo rapist defender."

#FireTyreekHill next.

You're back. Wonderful

Anything Dorsey did had Walrusprints all over it

# ? Jun 22, 2017 21:41

Spoeank: Jul 16, 2003; That's a nice set of 11 dynasty points there, it would be a shame if 3 rings were to happen with it

why does a jags fan care so much about the chiefs wow

# ? Jun 22, 2017 21:49

FUCKFACE MORON: Apr 23, 2010; by sebmojo

Parmesan Basil posted:

gently caress football now and forever but I'm very happy to drop back in and say "gently caress you John Dorsey. Go drop two seconds on the Worst QB in the league in hell you dumb piece of poo poo rapist defender."

#FireTyreekHill next.

Seek professional help

# ? Jun 22, 2017 21:50

Dubious: Mar 7, 2006; The Heroes the Vikings Deserve; Lipstick Apathy

Parmesan Basil posted:

gently caress football now and forever but I'm very happy to drop back in and say "gently caress you John Dorsey. Go drop two seconds on the Worst QB in the league in hell you dumb piece of poo poo rapist defender."

#FireTyreekHill next.

alex smith posts on somethingawful

# ? Jun 22, 2017 22:04

kiimo: Jul 24, 2003

After the shock has worn off it has occurred to me while listening to 810 and they�re saying word was after Ballard left the whole front office went to poo poo and thinking he may have been the brains of the operation. Clark apparently not happy about how Dorsey handled Maclin release, Charles release, Houston injury, etc. Managed to piss off Berry while giving him the biggest safety contract ever. Might have been dividing the locker room, I don't know.

Go offer a boatload of cash to Ballard to come back.

# ? Jun 22, 2017 22:07

pubic works project: Jan 28, 2005; No Decepticon in history, and I say this with great surety, has been treated worse or more unfairly.

kiimo posted:

After the shock has worn off it has occurred to me while listening to 810 and they�re saying word was after Ballard left the whole front office went to poo poo and thinking he may have been the brains of the operation. Clark apparently not happy about how Dorsey handled Maclin release, Charles release, Houston injury, etc. Managed to piss off Berry while giving him the biggest safety contract ever. Might have been dividing the locker room, I don't know.

Go offer a boatload of cash to Ballard to come back.

Fuuuuuckkkkkk youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!

# ? Jun 22, 2017 22:08

mcmagic: Jul 1, 2004; If you see this avatar while scrolling the succ zone, you have been visited by the mcmagic of shitty lib takes! Good luck and prosperity will come to you, but only if you reply "shut the fuck up mcmagic" to this post!

The Jets should hire John Dorsey to run their football operations but they wont.

# ? Jun 22, 2017 22:27

FizFashizzle: Mar 30, 2005

rotoworld with dat shade

quote:

Jets owner Woody Johnson has been officially nominated to be the United States' ambassador to the United Kingdom.

The move had been rumored since January. It had been delayed for reasons unknown by president Donald Trump. It isn't uncharted territory for a 21st century NFL owner, as Johnson will join the late, great Dan Rooney as a United States ambassador. Rooney was Barack Obama's ambassador to Ireland from 2009-12. It's unclear how the appointment will affect Johnson's football duties. Rooney remained involved with the Steelers during his time in Ireland. Ambassador of the United States to the Court of St James's is an important position. It's unclear what makes Johnson qualified.

# ? Jun 23, 2017 03:25

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

FizFashizzle posted:

rotoworld with dat shade

Qualification: one of four NYers still willing to acknowledge Donnie.

# ? Jun 23, 2017 04:13

Kalli: Jun 2, 2001

So I've been reading Howard Mudd's book, The View From the O-Line which is just a million anecdotes from a ton of different players, and this one was pretty great:

Ed White posted:

Joe Greene and I had been defensive tackles in the college all-star games. We played in one in San Francisco and one in Hawaii, so I got to know him pretty well.

We were playing the Steelers in my first game, and Joe had been their number one draft choice. We had a guard from USC named Jim Vellone. He was quite spicy. Apparently Jim called Joe a name he didn't like.

On the next series, Joe came back into the game with a screwdriver he'd gotten from the sideline. Unfortunately, they'd pulled Vellone out and put me in.

So there's Joe standing there seething, his eyes widened as open as he could get them, expecting Vellone to come back at left guard.

He had this screwdriver in his hand and I thought whoa. I'm yelling at him, "Hey Joe, It's me Ed!"
I don't remember exactly what happened next, but he went off the field. So I avoided having to block an angry defensive tackle holding a screwdriver.

Most everything else is a lot saner then that, but if you want some stuff I can post a few as I get to them. There's stuff from at least a hundred guys in here, though the most/best is from like Joe Thomas, Mike Munchak, Kyle Long, Joe Staley and like anyone associated with the Colts during the Dungy years.

Also I recommend it if you want a super light read. Perfect shitter book.

# ? Jun 23, 2017 04:13

whypick1: Dec 18, 2009; Just another jackass on the Internet

So that's where the inspiration for the beginning of Last Boy Scout came from.

In all seriousness though, :stare:

# ? Jun 23, 2017 04:20

Eifert Posting: Apr 1, 2007; Most of the time he catches it every time.; Grimey Drawer

Just think, if Joe had merced a random lineman the Steelers would have been worse. We really are in the darkest timeline.

# ? Jun 23, 2017 04:33

swickles: Aug 21, 2006; I guess that I don't need that though
Now you're just some QB that I used to know

Can't talk about Richie Incognito and not post this:

https://youtu.be/gx79IKPVe5w

# ? Jun 23, 2017 04:36

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# ? May 9, 2024 22:05

Strobe: Jun 30, 2014; GW BRAINWORMS CREW

kiimo posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RIcoYPk2FFA

I love this video, because he throws off his back foot in stride, doesn't follow through at all, throws it sidearm across his body to his receiver.

And it still goes 50 goddamn yards in the air.

# ? Jun 23, 2017 04:39

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Football Funhouse > NFL June N/V: My name is also Kombucha Violation

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