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D-LINK
Oct 1, 2007

I was talking to peachy Peach about kissy Kiss. He bought me a soda.
Of course his fetish is divorced, former trophy milfs. Of course.

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AsInHowe
Jan 11, 2007

red winged angel

MY NIGGA D-LINK posted:

Of course his fetish is divorced, former trophy milfs. Of course.

This is the most normal thing about Bill Belichick

Happy Noodle Boy
Jul 3, 2002


It's actually a cover. Belichick is incapable of love and his free time consists of endlessly analyzing other teams. Coaching the patriots alone no longer satisfy him. He actually has entire play books for at least 3 other teams.

Nissin Cup Nudist
Sep 3, 2011

Sleep with one eye open

We're off to Gritty Gritty land





would

And im not talking about whoever the chick is

Diqnol
May 10, 2010

MY NIGGA D-LINK posted:

Of course his fetish is divorced, former trophy milfs. Of course.

I thought he liked Tight Ends though

YOLOsubmarine
Oct 19, 2004

When asked which Pokemon he evolved into, Kamara pauses.

"Motherfucking, what's that big dragon shit? That orange motherfucker. Charizard."

MY NIGGA D-LINK posted:

Of course his fetish is divorced, former trophy milfs. Of course.

Same.

Sataere
Jul 20, 2005


Step 1: Start fight
Step 2: Attack straw man
Step 3: REPEAT

Do not engage with me



MY NIGGA D-LINK posted:

Of course his fetish is divorced, former trophy milfs. Of course.

This sounds too much like a criticism of perhaps the only good and right thing he's ever done.

kiimo
Jul 24, 2003

MY NIGGA D-LINK posted:

Of course his fetish is carving pentagrams with a dull hot dog fork into the skin of divorced, former trophy milfs. Of course.

D-LINK
Oct 1, 2007

I was talking to peachy Peach about kissy Kiss. He bought me a soda.

I wish my life was an endless parade of expensive lingerie cosplay, and hotel sex too.
I mean, at least he likes age appropriate women.

Amy Pole Her
Jun 17, 2002
He's a baller there's no doubt but I await his retirement

TITTIEKISSER69
Mar 19, 2005

SAVE THE BEES
PLANT MORE TREES
CLEAN THE SEAS
KISS TITTIESS




Diqnol posted:

I thought he liked Tight Ends though

2 or 3 at a time :pervert:

MrLogan
Feb 4, 2004

Ask me about Derek Carr's stolen MVP awards, those dastardly refs, and, oh yeah, having the absolute worst fucking gimmick in The Football Funhouse.

evilweasel posted:

reportedly he does want to win without brady to show it was all him

Considering all the non-Brady QBs have better records, I don't think it's an issue.

YOLOsubmarine
Oct 19, 2004

When asked which Pokemon he evolved into, Kamara pauses.

"Motherfucking, what's that big dragon shit? That orange motherfucker. Charizard."

MY NIGGA D-LINK posted:

I wish my life was an endless parade of expensive lingerie cosplay, and hotel sex too.
I mean, at least he likes age appropriate women.

Yea, hate on Bill all you want for football stuff, but throwing down with hot, blonde, middle aged divorcees is not to be scoffed at.

Gumbel2Gumbel
Apr 28, 2010

big money big clit posted:

Yea, hate on Bill all you want for football stuff, but throwing down with hot, blonde, middle aged divorcees is not to be scoffed at.

Being a divorcee's first guy out of the gate is an experience everyone should have.

Impossibly Perfect Sphere
Nov 6, 2002

They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!

MY NIGGA D-LINK posted:

I wish my life was an endless parade of expensive lingerie cosplay, and hotel sex too.
I mean, at least he likes age appropriate women.

Whatever he's doing, it's a lot less embarrassing than Robert Kraft.

kiimo
Jul 24, 2003

Gumbel2Gumbel posted:

Being a divorcee's first guy out of the gate is an experience everyone should have.

:hf:. In 20 years of marriage she had only done it missionary and only with her husband. Talk about a low bar.

Its Rinaldo
Aug 13, 2010

CODS BINCH

Gumbel2Gumbel posted:

Being a divorcee's first guy out of the gate is an experience everyone should have.

Lots of lighting the RG3 Signal itt

Amy Pole Her
Jun 17, 2002
Jesus I agreed with him

That's not that bad

Gumbel2Gumbel
Apr 28, 2010

Its Rinaldo posted:

Lots of lighting the RG3 Signal itt

Well this is more of a 'me thing' than an RG3 thing. I basically lived in a dumb porno for 7-8 months. (She was older)

I'm not trying to brag or overshare, I just want to advise everyone here if they have the opportunity with a brand new divorcee to absolutely go for it.

Amy Pole Her
Jun 17, 2002
3 months or so ago I had a 1.5 month thing with one. It was quite fun. Agreed! But you've gotta be careful if they start saying different then acting

Chromatic
Jan 21, 2005

You guys ready to hear a satanic song?

Gumbel2Gumbel posted:

Being a divorcee's first guy out of the gate is an experience everyone should have.

My parents opened a restaurant in 1994 in a small time and it lasted until around 2000. It only closed because my stepfather passed and my mom didn't want to deal with running it all herself. 6 years isn't too bad I guess. We had by far the best tacos in town, with a reputation to the point that the hammer-dick idiots running the competing restaurant a mile down the road tried to copy our recipe. They failed miserably.

That point of that story is that during the time the restaurant was open and I was still in grade school, an idiot classmate tried to taunt me all the time about how the food was bad and the restaurant sucked, etc. Well, fast-forward 12 years later and I was in the middle of having a 3 month long fling with his wife while they were in the middle of a divorce.

It owned.

Chromatic fucked around with this message at 03:19 on Jun 28, 2017

FUCKFACE MORON
Apr 23, 2010

by sebmojo
I hooked up with a divorcee on a cruise once :smugdon:

The_Hat
Sep 24, 2008

Chromatic posted:

My parents opened a restaurant in 1994 in a small time and it lasted until around 2000. It only closed because my stepfather passed and my mom didn't want to deal with running it all herself. 6 years isn't too bad I guess. We had by far the best tacos in town, with a reputation to the point that the hammer-dick idiots running the competing restaurant a mile down the road tried to copy our recipe. They failed miserably.

That point of that story is that during the time the restaurant was open and I was still in grade school, an idiot classmate tried to taunt me all the time about how the food was bad and the restaurant sucked, etc. Well, fast-forward 12 years later and I was in the middle of having a 3 month long fling with his wife while they were in the middle of a divorce.

It owned.

drat

Eifert Posting
Apr 1, 2007

Most of the time he catches it every time.
Grimey Drawer

AsInHowe posted:



A gift for a certain kind of Steelers fan in your life.

So that is a poorly thought out mouthpiece, right? Not a no foolin' black sambo doll?


Jesus christ how did the planet get sent back to 1920?

Gumbel2Gumbel posted:

What was your name before? I completely forgot.

Atlarge -> Aimbot -> Toussaint Louverture -> Eifert Posting

Eifert Posting fucked around with this message at 04:19 on Jun 28, 2017

Grittybeard
Mar 29, 2010

Bad, very bad!

Eifert Posting posted:

So that is a poorly thought out mouthpiece, right? Not a no foolin' black sambo doll?

Looks like he does use (or at least did at some point) a bigass pink mouthpiece:

Ehud
Sep 19, 2003

football.

Wrong thread

Gumbel2Gumbel
Apr 28, 2010

Chromatic posted:

My parents opened a restaurant in 1994 in a small time and it lasted until around 2000. It only closed because my stepfather passed and my mom didn't want to deal with running it all herself. 6 years isn't too bad I guess. We had by far the best tacos in town, with a reputation to the point that the hammer-dick idiots running the competing restaurant a mile down the road tried to copy our recipe. They failed miserably.

That point of that story is that during the time the restaurant was open and I was still in grade school, an idiot classmate tried to taunt me all the time about how the food was bad and the restaurant sucked, etc. Well, fast-forward 12 years later and I was in the middle of having a 3 month long fling with his wife while they were in the middle of a divorce.

It owned.

I salute you.

Hot Diggity!
Apr 3, 2010

SKELITON_BRINGING_U_ON.GIF

Eli Wiggum posted:

I hooked up with a divorcee on a cruise once :smugdon:

Congrats but wrong thread buddy

Edit wait has divorce chat spilled into the gdt?

Sataere
Jul 20, 2005


Step 1: Start fight
Step 2: Attack straw man
Step 3: REPEAT

Do not engage with me



Chromatic posted:

My parents opened a restaurant in 1994 in a small time and it lasted until around 2000. It only closed because my stepfather passed and my mom didn't want to deal with running it all herself. 6 years isn't too bad I guess. We had by far the best tacos in town, with a reputation to the point that the hammer-dick idiots running the competing restaurant a mile down the road tried to copy our recipe. They failed miserably.

That point of that story is that during the time the restaurant was open and I was still in grade school, an idiot classmate tried to taunt me all the time about how the food was bad and the restaurant sucked, etc. Well, fast-forward 12 years later and I was in the middle of having a 3 month long fling with his wife while they were in the middle of a divorce.

It owned.

I hope you told him that you ate tacos with your homemade recipe off her body

CharlestheHammer
Jun 26, 2011

YOU SAY MY POSTS ARE THE RAVINGS OF THE DUMBEST PERSON ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH BUT YOU YOURSELF ARE READING THEM. CURIOUS!
But when did everyone clap.

a patagonian cavy
Jan 12, 2009

UUA CVG 230000 KZID /RM TODAY IS THE FIRST DAY OF THE BENGALS DYNASTY

CharlestheHammer posted:

But when did everyone clap.

indigi
Jul 20, 2004

how can we not talk about family
when family's all that we got?

Grittybeard posted:

Looks like he does use (or at least did at some point) a bigass pink mouthpiece:



yeah, I'm gonna go ahead and suggest tweaking the design a bit is fine in this case

pubic works project
Jan 28, 2005

No Decepticon in history, and I say this with great surety, has been treated worse or more unfairly.

Chromatic posted:

My parents opened a restaurant in 1994 in a small time and it lasted until around 2000. It only closed because my stepfather passed and my mom didn't want to deal with running it all herself. 6 years isn't too bad I guess. We had by far the best tacos in town, with a reputation to the point that the hammer-dick idiots running the competing restaurant a mile down the road tried to copy our recipe. They failed miserably.

That point of that story is that during the time the restaurant was open and I was still in grade school, an idiot classmate tried to taunt me all the time about how the food was bad and the restaurant sucked, etc. Well, fast-forward 12 years later and I was in the middle of having a 3 month long fling with his wife while they were in the middle of a divorce.

It owned.

But did you tell him about it and publicly shame him?

SKULL.GIF
Jan 20, 2017


https://www.si.com/nfl/2017/06/28/clinton-portis-financial-ruin-where-are-they-now

quote:

Fortune pilfered, Clinton Portis contemplated revenge under the veil of darkness. On a handful of late nights and early mornings in 2013 he lurked in his car near a Washington, D.C.–area office building, pistol at his side, and waited for one of several men who had managed a large chunk of the $43.1 million he earned with his 2,230 carries over nine NFL seasons. Purportedly safe investments had suspiciously soured, and almost all the money Portis set aside to fund his future had evaporated. That future included a mother who doubles as his hero and four sons scattered across the Southeast. Their comfort and security. Their happiness.

The hucksters he deemed most responsible ignored his calls. None were bound for jail. Their coffers were dry; a lawsuit seemed pointless. Once his helplessness gave way to rage, Portis lusted for a confrontation. He would meet this betrayer not with pleas or demands, or even blows delivered by thick fists attached to thick forearms. Bullets, he thought, were his sole means of balancing the scale.

“It wasn’t no beat up,” Portis says. “It was kill.”

If you ever strike it rich by some stroke of fortune don't bother with "financial managers". They will suck you dry.

SKULL.GIF fucked around with this message at 17:13 on Jun 28, 2017

Silly Burrito
Nov 27, 2007

SET A COURSE FOR
THE FLAVOR QUADRANT

Sataere posted:

I hope you told him that you ate tacos with your homemade recipe off her body

Perfectly spherical tortas.

Volkerball
Oct 15, 2009

by FactsAreUseless

SKULL.GIF posted:

https://www.si.com/nfl/2017/06/28/clinton-portis-financial-ruin-where-are-they-now


If you ever strike it rich by some stroke of fortune don't bother with "financial managers". They will suck you dry.

That's some Lonnie Smith poo poo

TheChirurgeon
Aug 7, 2002

Remember how good you are
Taco Defender

SKULL.GIF posted:

https://www.si.com/nfl/2017/06/28/clinton-portis-financial-ruin-where-are-they-now


If you ever strike it rich by some stroke of fortune don't bother with "financial managers". They will suck you dry.

Man gently caress the SI.com site

SKULL.GIF
Jan 20, 2017


quote:

More worrisome are the occasional lapses in memory that have begun to plague him. Portis sometimes struggles to find words or loses his train of thought; through the course of an interview he habitually repeats himself as he searches for his next point. He gets lost driving in familiar places. He missed the last two months of the 2009 season after taking a helmet-to-helmet shot against the Falcons, and he says he suffered more than 10 concussions in his career. On occasion, he strode off the field with no memory of the game he’d just played. Content to sleep it off, he rarely sought medical help—as a young player, he’d been taught to avoid the training room at all costs. “You can’t make the club in the tub,” he says.

Portis is among the former players eligible to receive benefits from the NFL’s $1 billion concussion settlement, which could entitle him to up to $1.5 million if he shows signs of early dementia and as much as $5 million should he be diagnosed with ALS—but in order to receive even a penny he would have to undergo testing and demonstrate clear symptoms of severe problems. And he’s wary of being evaluated because those tests might reveal that the fog is encroaching just as he has learned to navigate this complicated world. “F--- that concussion money,” he says. “I’m scared. I’m really scared of the results.”

Imagine suddenly not knowing where you are and driving around in circles in your home neighborhood

Portis is 35 years old

latinotwink1997
Jan 2, 2008

Taste my Ball of Hope, foul dragon!


Sataere posted:

I hope you told him that you ate tacos with your homemade recipe off her body

I hope you told him your tacos tasted better than his.

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a neat cape
Feb 22, 2007

Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!

Volkerball posted:

That's some Lonnie Smith poo poo

Came to post this.

It's Pretty Good.

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