- Junpei
- Oct 4, 2015
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![Probation](https://fi.somethingawful.com/customtitles/title-probation.png) Can't post for 11 years!
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Joestar Family Secret Technique: RUN AWAY!
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#
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Jun 28, 2017 02:39
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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#
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May 13, 2024 00:44
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- Leraika
- Jun 14, 2015
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![](https://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/ef/4c/00215222.0004.png)
Luckily, I *did* save your old avatar. Fucked around and found out indeed.
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Save the woman, who is not Denny
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#
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Jun 28, 2017 19:59
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- Junpei
- Oct 4, 2015
-
![Probation](https://fi.somethingawful.com/customtitles/title-probation.png) Can't post for 11 years!
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Save the woman, who is not Denny
We are good people (except to Danny)
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#
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Jun 28, 2017 20:07
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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![](http://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/14/94/00215902.0001.jpg)
![](https://fi.somethingawful.com/images/avatars/ngctheend.png)
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quote:
Quickly, you pull the chronometer from around your neck and put it in the keyhole.
"RRAAAOOORRRGGGHHH!" the dragon bellows, filling the small room with flames and more smoke.
The woman shrieks in terror. You turn the chronometer in the lock. To your surprise, the lock pops open. The woman quickly pulls off her chains, then grabs your hand. "This way!" she cries. "The dragon can't follow!"
She leads you through a small door and slams it. Behind the door, the dragon roars angrily.
"Thank you for saving me," the woman says. "Is there any way I can repay you?"
You explain that you're looking for your brother. "He has red hair," you say, describing him.
The woman nods. "I've seen a young boy who looks just like that in the Throne Room." She points to a door labeled TO KING RUTHBERT'S THRONE ROOM.
You glance at the chronometer. Time is running out! You've got only half an hour to find Denny and return to the present.
"Good luck." The woman smiles. "And thanks again."
quote:
You step through a door labeled TO KING RUTHBERT'S THRONE ROOOM and climb a short flight of steps. At the top, you enter a huge stone room.
Colorful tapestries hang on the walls between narrow, arch-shaped windows. Ladies in long gowns sit on wooden benches. Around the room, knights in armor stand stiffly at attention.
At the far end of the room, a wooden throne stands on a raised platform. Sitting on the throne is a fat, bearded man wearing a red robe and gold crown.
King Ruthbert, you realize.
Next to him, on a smaller throne, is a small person. His crown is too big and slips down over his face.
A nearby knight draws his sword and raises it to your throat. The sword lightly pricks your skin.
"What are you doing here, stranger?" the knight demands.
"I'm a traveler from the future, you quickly explain. "I'm looking for my brother. He has red hair and-"
"Silence!" the knight shouts. "I'll not listen to any more of your lies! You're a spy for King Henry!"
quote:
"King who?" you ask.
"Do you take me for an idiot?" the knight snarls. "Henry's forces are expected to attack any day! Don't deny you're an advance scout!"
"I'm a kid from the future!" you repeat. "I only want-"
But the knight doesn't listen. He quickly ties your hands behind your back, then drags you up to the throne. He tosses you at the king's feet.
"Who is this?" the king demands.
"A spy for King Henry!" the knight answers.
You look up to deny it. That's when you notice who's sitting on the small throne next to the king.
Denny!
"I've been looking all over for you!" you tell him. "We've got to get back to Dr. Peebles's lab! You can't stay-"
"Silence!" King Ruthbert bellows. "No one speaks to my son without permission!"
"Your son?" you gasp. "But this is my brother, Denny-"
"He's my son, Ruthelford!" the king interrupts. "I always wanted a son. When this boy appeared, I adopted him!"
quote:
"He's just an ordinary twentieth-century kid!" you protest.
"I'm not ordinary!" Denny yells. "I don't like this person," he adds, whining to the king.
"Listen to me, Denny!" you shout. "You're in big trouble. You've got to come with me now!"
"You're not the boss of me!" Denny yells.
"Boil this spy in oil!" shouts the king.
"Yeah!" Denny agrees, clapping. "Boil the spy in oil!"
"Denny, you're my brother!" you protest in horror. But Denny just smirks his obnoxious smirk.
Then the two knights grab you and begin to drag you out of the Throne Room.
"Wait!" you shout. "You're making a terrible mistake!"
But no one listens. You're dragged up to the roof of the castle. There, you see a bubbling black pot.
Yikes! Your hands are tied behind you. You can't use the chronometer. Unless a miracle happens, you're about to be boiled in oil!
Is this your lucky day?
If today's date is an ODD number, turn to PAGE 85.
If today's date is an EVEN number, turn to PAGE 52.
quote:
The two knights drag you over to the pot of boiling oil. The king and Denny are right behind them.
"On the count of three, carry out the sentence!" the king orders.
"Denny, help!" you plead.
But Denny sticks his tongue out at you. Then he gives the king the thumbs-up sign.
"One!" the king says. The knights pick you up.
"Please - just listen to me-" you cry.
"Two!" The knights lift you high in the air above the pot.
Frantically, you struggle to free your hands, so you can use the chronometer. But they are tied too tightly.
"Three-" the king cried. At that moment, a hair-curling scream splits the air. Dozens of armored knights rush onto the roof. They're all waving swords and knives and holding out large shields. The roof is swarming with knights ready for battle!
quote:
"It's King Henry's army!" King Ruthbert shouts.
The king's two knights spring into action. They drop you and jump in front of the king. They desperately try to defend him against the invading army.
When the knights let you go, you roll out of the way. You've got to grab Denny and get out of here. Fast!
But one of King Henry's knights has already seized your brother. You watch in horror as the knight lifts your brother over his head and walks him over to the end of the castle.
Oh, no! The knight's about to toss Denny over the side!
You've got to do something, but what? For just a moment you think about doing nothing. After all, Denny was planning to have you boiled in oil. But no - he's your brother, after all.
Your hands are still tied behind your back. Maybe you can trick the knight into letting Denny go. Or - maybe you can roll into the knight's path before he reaches the edge of the roof.
Trick the knight on PAGE 121.
Roll into his path on PAGE 91.
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Chronometer
Goal Endings: 1/2
Bad Endings
Knocked face-first into a pit of quicksand by a belching dinosaur.
Got distracted watching a prehistoric chicken hatch.
Got locked up and used as a zoo exhibit.
Answered the teacher's question wrong and got frammilized.
Wrapped up by space plant tentacles.
Forced to watch Washington cross the Delaware forever.
Jumped into a moat and got eaten by crocodiles.
Lost a game of baseball with a knight and got chucked into the moat.
Achievements
Knight in Shining Armor: Rescued a princess from a dragon.![:siren: :siren:](https://fi.somethingawful.com/images/smilies/dark_mode/siren2.gif)
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#
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Jun 28, 2017 20:27
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- Junpei
- Oct 4, 2015
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![Probation](https://fi.somethingawful.com/customtitles/title-probation.png) Can't post for 11 years!
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Yeah, we can use our modern knowledge to trick this sucker.
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#
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Jun 28, 2017 20:40
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- Chronische
- Aug 7, 2012
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![](https://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/6a/6d/00188816.0001.jpg)
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Why is there no third option to let the little murderous poo poo die? He tried to kill you, horribly!
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#
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Jun 28, 2017 22:17
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- Jen X
- Sep 29, 2014
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![](http://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/68/e5/00212151.0004.png)
To bring light to the darkness, whether that darkness be ignorance, injustice, apathy, or stagnation.
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Are you sure we can't change the goal endings to unmaking our brother?
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#
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Jun 29, 2017 01:56
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- FredMSloniker
- Jan 2, 2008
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![](https://fi.somethingawful.com/customtitles/title-fredmsloniker-3.png)
Why, yes, I do like Kirby games.
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Little kids are even stupider than the rest of us, and I don't mean that derisively; their brains lack both sufficient input and sufficient physical structure to function with any maturity. I guarantee you that you did stuff just as bad when you were Denny's age. Heck, my six-year-old little sister once threatened to kill my mom because she (the sister) didn't want her hair brushed. You, and she, just didn't have someone around who would actually do it.
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#
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Jun 29, 2017 02:11
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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![](http://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/14/94/00215902.0001.jpg)
![](https://fi.somethingawful.com/images/avatars/ngctheend.png)
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quote:
Denny screams in terror as the knight prepares to toss him to the ground.
"Stop!" you yell. "That's King Ruthbert's son, Ruthelford," you say.
The knight looks at you in surprise. "Of course. Why do you think I'm getting ready to dash his brains out?"
"King Ruthbert will pay a huge ransom for him," you go on. "More gold and jewels than you can imagine."
"Is that right?" the knight replies. "How do you know?"
"I'm an agent of the king," you tell the knight. It's the first lie that enters your mind.
"Really? Then why are your hands tied?" the knight asks.
"Well, uh, er..." You try to think of a good answer. "Untie me and I'll show you!"
The knight looks you up and down. He draws his sword.
Oh, no! What's he going to do?
quote:
The knight uses his sharp sword to slash the ropes around your arms. You're free!
Before the knight can question you further, you jump up and karate kick the sword from his hand.
The sword falls to the ground. You can't believe the karate lessons you took last summer worked! You karate kick the knight again.
And lose your balance.
You reach out and grab Denny and tumble to the ground, hitting a button on the chronometer.
You sprawl on the ground, dizzy. And then you hear it. "All hail the king! All hail the king!"
You gaze up and gasp. You're in a strange land. And hundreds of people are chanting and bowing. Bowing to you!
You are the king!
You stand up and give your first order. "Take this slave boy away," you say, pointing at Denny. "I am the boss now."
THE END
Told you this route had the best ending in the book.
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Chronometer
Goal Endings: 1/2
Bad Endings
Knocked face-first into a pit of quicksand by a belching dinosaur.
Got distracted watching a prehistoric chicken hatch.
Got locked up and used as a zoo exhibit.
Answered the teacher's question wrong and got frammilized.
Wrapped up by space plant tentacles.
Forced to watch Washington cross the Delaware forever.
Jumped into a moat and got eaten by crocodiles.
Lost a game of baseball with a knight and got chucked into the moat.
Achievements
Knight in Shining Armor: Rescued a princess from a dragon.
The Boss of You: Gave Denny his much-deserved comeuppance.![:siren: :siren:](https://fi.somethingawful.com/images/smilies/dark_mode/siren2.gif)
Our options posted:
- Find Denny instead of travelling through time.
- Go to the future.
- Use the chronometer before the teacher reaches us.
- Go to the engine room.
- Go deeper into the castle.
- Run from the dragon.
- Read the book on an odd-numbered day.
- Roll into the knight's path.
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#
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Jun 29, 2017 03:45
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- Jen X
- Sep 29, 2014
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![](http://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/68/e5/00212151.0004.png)
To bring light to the darkness, whether that darkness be ignorance, injustice, apathy, or stagnation.
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We won!
Now let's go back to the future.
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#
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Jun 29, 2017 03:47
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- Cathode Raymond
- Dec 30, 2015
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![](https://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/66/5f/00216829.0002.gif)
My antenna is telling me that you're probably wrong about this.
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Soiled Meat
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It was a long hard road but we did it. We finally did it.
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#
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Jun 29, 2017 03:48
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- Chronische
- Aug 7, 2012
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![](https://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/6a/6d/00188816.0001.jpg)
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That's the one true ending. We won. The tyranny of your bratty little brother is ended, once and for all!
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#
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Jun 29, 2017 04:17
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- Junpei
- Oct 4, 2015
-
![Probation](https://fi.somethingawful.com/customtitles/title-probation.png) Can't post for 11 years!
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We won!
Now let's go back to the future.
We have to go back... To the future!
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#
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Jun 29, 2017 04:31
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- Leraika
- Jun 14, 2015
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![](https://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/ef/4c/00215222.0004.png)
Luckily, I *did* save your old avatar. Fucked around and found out indeed.
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Wow, that's suddenly dated.
NYC, I guess.
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#
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Jun 29, 2017 19:59
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- VivaLa Eeveelution
- Apr 3, 2011
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![](http://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/da/c7/00174824.0001.png)
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quote:You thought you'd get to do a lot of cool things, like visit the Statue of Liberty, ride to the 102nd floor of the World Trade Center, and ice-skate at Rockefeller Center.
I wanna see what the view from there would be like in the future!
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#
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Jun 29, 2017 20:38
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- Arrhythmia
- Jul 22, 2011
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Let's check out the 9/11 free NYC
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#
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Jun 29, 2017 23:24
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- Junpei
- Oct 4, 2015
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![Probation](https://fi.somethingawful.com/customtitles/title-probation.png) Can't post for 11 years!
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Let's check out the 9/11 free NYC
This, but when was this book written?
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#
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Jun 29, 2017 23:28
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- Leraika
- Jun 14, 2015
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![](https://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/ef/4c/00215222.0004.png)
Luckily, I *did* save your old avatar. Fucked around and found out indeed.
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This, but when was this book written?
Wikipedia says 1995.
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#
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Jun 30, 2017 01:57
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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![](http://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/14/94/00215902.0001.jpg)
![](https://fi.somethingawful.com/images/avatars/ngctheend.png)
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quote:
You glide through the mist toward the New York City street where you saw the red-haired boy. Honking taxis, buses, and trucks zip along the street. Tall buildings surround you. On the streets, people are shouting, arguing, and laughing.
Uh-oh. This looks exactly like New York City in the present. Maybe something went wrong with the chronometer.
You glance around for the red-haired kid you saw. But you don't see him anywhere.
You approach a corner newsstand. "Excuse me," you say to the vendor. "Can you tell me how to get to the Museum of Natural History?"
"What do I look like, an information booth?" he snaps back at you.
"Never mind," you mutter. "Who needs your-"
Then you notice a stack of newspapers. The one on top has tomorrow's date. You're in the future all right - one crummy day in the future!
No fair! you think. You're about to push the right-hand button on the chronometer to travel further into the future when something makes you gasp.
quote:
Strolling down the block in front of you is a familiar-looking family: a father, a mother, and two kids. There's a very good reason why the family looks so familiar. It's your family.
You watch as your Mom, Dad, Denny, and you continue down the block. Your parents are talking to each other, and you and Denny seem to be arguing - some things will never change.
You watch as Denny gives you a karate chop in the arm, and you punch him back.
It feels so strange to watch yourself like this. There are two of you in the same place! What would happen if you spoke to your future self?
You still haven't decided what to do when your family reaches the corner. The light changes and they start to cross to the other side of the street.
A moment later you hear frightened screams and shouts, and then loud honking. You turn toward the noise. A green truck is speeding down the street.
The truck shows no sign of slowing down, and it's headed straight toward your family!
quote:
The truck picks up speed as it approaches the corner. There's no way your family can get out of the way.
In another moment they will be flattened like pancakes, and there's nothing you can do!
But maybe...
You touch the chronometer. Maybe you can go back in time and stop the accident before it happens.
Should you go back in the past a few minutes and try to stop your family? Or go back farther in time and try to stop the truck?
To stop your family, turn to PAGE 31.
To stop the truck, turn to PAGE 34.
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Chronometer
Goal Endings: 1/2
Bad Endings
Knocked face-first into a pit of quicksand by a belching dinosaur.
Got distracted watching a prehistoric chicken hatch.
Got locked up and used as a zoo exhibit.
Answered the teacher's question wrong and got frammilized.
Wrapped up by space plant tentacles.
Forced to watch Washington cross the Delaware forever.
Jumped into a moat and got eaten by crocodiles.
Lost a game of baseball with a knight and got chucked into the moat.
Achievements
Knight in Shining Armor: Rescued a princess from a dragon.
The Boss of You: Gave Denny his much-deserved comeuppance.
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#
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Jun 30, 2017 04:11
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- EagerSleeper
- Feb 3, 2010
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![](https://i.somethingawful.com/images/title-permabanned.gif)
by R. Guyovich
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Huzzah, we managed to defeat our mortal enemy, Denny! But now we gotta rescue him again...
Stop our family. Telling people to not get ran over works in real life, right?
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#
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Jun 30, 2017 04:27
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- VivaLa Eeveelution
- Apr 3, 2011
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![](http://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/da/c7/00174824.0001.png)
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Oh no no no, we're stopping the truck. Otherwise we'll end up crammed in a church with a bunch of people we pretend to like while the love children of Ridley and a langolier eat the temporal paradox we'd have just made.
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#
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Jun 30, 2017 06:36
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- inflatablefish
- Oct 24, 2010
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It's a busy day in New York city, a perfect time to warn them by running across the splat street!
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#
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Jun 30, 2017 22:12
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- Junpei
- Oct 4, 2015
-
![Probation](https://fi.somethingawful.com/customtitles/title-probation.png) Can't post for 11 years!
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Hey, look at me!
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#
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Jun 30, 2017 22:29
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- VivaLa Eeveelution
- Apr 3, 2011
-
![](http://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/da/c7/00174824.0001.png)
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I hope that however we distract them, it hurts Denny.
E: hey why can't we just remember to not cross the street tomorrow
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#
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Jul 1, 2017 03:56
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
-
![](http://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/14/94/00215902.0001.jpg)
![](https://fi.somethingawful.com/images/avatars/ngctheend.png)
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quote:
What would make you and Denny turn around? you wonder. You've got to create a distraction.
You glance at the newsstand again, and an idea comes to you. It's not much - but it's the only thing you can think of.
Quickly, you check your pockets. You've got about thirty dollars - your allowance, plus some money your dad gave you to but souvenirs.
You ask the newsstand owner for change. You get a bunch of bills and coins. Suddenly a familiar-looking, red-haired boy runs past you. You stare at him, then glance back at your family. Denny is still with the rest of your family - what's he doing here, too?
"Denny!" you shout. "What are you doing here?"
quote:
Denny shrugs and starts to explain. "I went through that door, and-"
But time is running out. You cut him off. "Stay here, okay?"
"You're not the boss of me!" Denny whines.
You groan. Your little brother is never going to cooperate unless you tell him the plan.
You whisper in his ear.
Denny gives you a big smile. "I'll stay around for that," he promises.
quote:
You quickly jump up on the counter of the newsstand, and then climb onto the roof.
"Hey!" the owner shouts. "Get down from there!"
You ignore him. While he continues to yell, you take some of your money and throw it down on the sidewalk. "FREE MONEY!" you shout.
Down below, Denny shouts the same thing. "FREE MONEY!"
"Look at that!" someone shouts. "Those kids are throwing away money!"
Two or three passersby pick up coins and bills. A crowd starts to gather and cars and taxis brake to see what's going on.
You watch as Denny bends down and pockets some of the change.
"Denny!" you scream. "Put that-"
Loud honking starts up in the distance. The truck is coming! You can see it now - speeding for the intersection where your family is about to cross!
quote:
You look over at your future family. The future Denny and the future you are laughing and pointing at the shower of money.
Your parents are watching, too. Then your father points to his watch and says something. The others nod and start for the corner again.
"No!" you shout.
A split second later, the green truck hurtles toward the crowded intersection. Brakes squeal and horns blare. You freeze, barely able to watch the scene unfolding in front of you.
Your mother lets out a blood-chilling scream.
Have you saved your family?
quote:
As you look on in horror, your father sees the runaway truck. He throws out his arms to hold back you, your mother, and Denny.
Your family halts in their tracks... and the truck speeds on past!
You did it! You saved your family!
Now you've got to grab Denny and get back to Dr. Peebles's lab.
"Come on, Denny," you call.
"No!" Denny cries. "You can't make me!"
You glance at the chronometer. Dr. Peebles said you had to return within two hours of real time. The minutes are ticking by. You have to take Denny back as soon as possible, or you could get lost in time.
You're bigger and stronger - should you just grab him? Or can you talk him into going with you?
Grab Denny on PAGE 122.
Talk him into going with you on PAGE 134.
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Chronometer
Goal Endings: 1/2
Bad Endings
Knocked face-first into a pit of quicksand by a belching dinosaur.
Got distracted watching a prehistoric chicken hatch.
Got locked up and used as a zoo exhibit.
Answered the teacher's question wrong and got frammilized.
Wrapped up by space plant tentacles.
Forced to watch Washington cross the Delaware forever.
Jumped into a moat and got eaten by crocodiles.
Lost a game of baseball with a knight and got chucked into the moat.
Achievements
Knight in Shining Armor: Rescued a princess from a dragon.
The Boss of You: Gave Denny his much-deserved comeuppance.
[/quote]
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#
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Jul 1, 2017 21:50
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- Junpei
- Oct 4, 2015
-
![Probation](https://fi.somethingawful.com/customtitles/title-probation.png) Can't post for 11 years!
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Grab The B(r)other and Run
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#
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Jul 1, 2017 22:01
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
-
![](http://fi.somethingawful.com/safs/titles/14/94/00215902.0001.jpg)
![](https://fi.somethingawful.com/images/avatars/ngctheend.png)
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quote:
You reach out to grab Denny before hitting the buttons on the chronometer.
"NOOO!" Denny shrieks. He pulls away and tears off down the street.
"Denny, come back here!" you yell. But Denny keeps going. He darts across the street and runs smack into his double - the future Denny. They both fall onto the sidewalk.
Your mother's face goes white when she sees two Dennys.
"Okay," your father demands. "Which one of you is really my son?"
"I am!" says one of the red-haired Dennys.
"I am," insists the other one. He punches the first one on the arm. The other Denny punches back.
You've got to do something! You rush across the street and grab both Dennys. Then you push the buttons on the chronometer.
quote:
A tingling sensation races through your body as you're transported back to the present and the Museum of Natural History. When the misty air clears, you're back in the time exhibit, standing near a sundial.
"Come on," you say to Denny, sighing with relief. "Let's go find Mom and Dad."
"No way," two voices reply in stereo. "You're not the boss of me."
"Oh, no," you moan out loud as you realize what you've done.
Both Dennys have returned to the present with you!
You've saved your brother's life, but ruined your own.
THE END
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Chronometer
Goal Endings: 1/2
Bad Endings
Knocked face-first into a pit of quicksand by a belching dinosaur.
Got distracted watching a prehistoric chicken hatch.
Got locked up and used as a zoo exhibit.
Answered the teacher's question wrong and got frammilized.
Wrapped up by space plant tentacles.
Forced to watch Washington cross the Delaware forever.
Jumped into a moat and got eaten by crocodiles.
Lost a game of baseball with a knight and got chucked into the moat.
Accidentally brought two Dennys back to the present.![:siren: :siren:](https://fi.somethingawful.com/images/smilies/dark_mode/siren2.gif)
Achievements
Knight in Shining Armor: Rescued a princess from a dragon.
The Boss of You: Gave Denny his much-deserved comeuppance.
Our options posted:
- Find Denny instead of travelling through time.
- Go to the future.
- Use the chronometer before the teacher reaches us.
- Go to the engine room.
- Go deeper into the castle.
- Run from the dragon.
- Read the book on an odd-numbered day.
- Roll into the knight's path.
- Try to stop the truck.
- Warn your family.
- Talk Denny into going with you.
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#
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Jul 2, 2017 02:20
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- Cobalt Zeroni
- Feb 15, 2015
-
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Warn your family.
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#
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Jul 2, 2017 02:22
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- Adbot
-
ADBOT LOVES YOU
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#
?
May 13, 2024 00:44
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- Junpei
- Oct 4, 2015
-
![Probation](https://fi.somethingawful.com/customtitles/title-probation.png) Can't post for 11 years!
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Warning: Death approaching!
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#
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Jul 2, 2017 02:36
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