|
  
|
#
?
Jul 4, 2017 19:27
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 29, 2024 16:02 |
|
|
|
|
#
?
Jul 4, 2017 22:59
|
|
|
lmao
|
|
#
?
Jul 5, 2017 00:26
|
|
|
The math checks out
|
|
#
?
Jul 5, 2017 00:40
|
|
|
I see Finn has a new twitter account.
|
|
#
?
Jul 5, 2017 00:58
|
|
|
new BDS campaign against Red Bull
|
|
#
?
Jul 5, 2017 05:42
|
|
|
idgi
|
|
#
?
Jul 5, 2017 09:26
|
|
|
FIFA has a single-player story that involves a fake player and it feels like a marketing major's wet dream. Also lolling at this fake player saying Chelsea is a top club with amazing fans. No word on if they pull out the ol' A4s when the fake player doesn't play well. Also I know this is pathetic (perfect for this thread!), but I feel like people really need to watch this. It's tough to get through, but these fans have made a song for Chattanooga FC that's to the tune of that "this is my fight song" song... you know, "Fight Song" TheBigAristotle posted:There's a nice goal in here, somewhere. But the crowd songs. The crowd songs are... perfect.
|
|
#
?
Jul 5, 2017 15:30
|
|
|
https://twitter.com/NuclearTakes/status/882861521637953536
|
|
#
?
Jul 6, 2017 13:32
|
|
|
Yeah, @thehotrain is right!
|
|
#
?
Jul 6, 2017 14:58
|
|
|
I've thought about this long and hard and I figure I'll just go ahead and give my thoughts considering this is a conspiracy thread: Before Mourinho came back in 2013, it was well known that Abramovich loved Pep Guardiola and the style of football he had for his teams. He tried his very best to lure Pep out of his sabbatical after we parted ways with Di Matteo. Once that didn't work, we needed an interim manager and we got Rafa Benitez. Roman thought he could try again after the 12/13 season to lure Pep again to Chelsea. Roman fails again as Pep agreed to become the next manager of Bayern Munich. Giant blow to Abramovich as the manager he longed for did not seem much interested in the Premier League for the moment. Despite winning the Europa League and Rafa steadying the ship to get us 3rd, we haven't won the league since 2010, and want to get back to winning trophies more consistently. Since Rafa was leaving and Pep was headed to Bayern, Roman knew he had to swallow his pride and get the best available manager. So Jose Mourinho came back. This is where it gets interesting. Roman never wanted Jose back but he knew he had to suck it up and do what was best for the club. Mourinho didn't want a Chelsea return either. It's well documented Sir Alex contacted Mourinho about potentially joining Manchester United as next manager but was told he was already agreed to join Chelsea. You have to remember, in 2013, Mourinho had spent almost 5 years away from English football. While Mourinho long desired to join a club like Manchester United, his decision to join Chelsea as opposed to hold out for the United job was simply down not knowing how well his tactics and style of football would play out. He's so afraid of failure that he didn't want to get to United and fail after not coaching in the country for 5 years. He chose to join Chelsea to get his feet back in the water while also getting revenge on those that forced him out. You see despite all the grandstanding, Mourinho never cared about Chelsea. The man has played way more youth and believed in more youth products at Man United than he did at Chelsea and we have the better Academy! Romelu Lukaku, Kevin de Bruyne, Ryan Bertrand, Thibaut Courtois. Just 4 of the players that could have set Chelsea up for the next 10 years all sent away by Mourinho initially. Despite the first year's striker options being Fernando Torres, Samuel Eto'o, and Demba Ba, Mourinho refused to give Lukaku a chance and later moved on to Everton for an astounding £28m. After alienating Juan Mata and selling him to United despite being 2 time Chelsea player of the year and showing endless amounts of quality, Mourinho decided it was time to play Oscar and that Oscar was the better option in the no.10 role. What about De Bruyne? No De Bruyne not good enough so he has KdB sold to Wolfsburg. No quality no.10s gone in sacrifice for Oscar who's never lived up to the hype and isn't even at Chelsea anymore. Mourinho didn't see Courtois as the #1 at first as he went back to his preferred Petr Cech and we signed Mark Schwarzer. And Ryan Bertrand. Never even given a chance. He was a budding young player that's seen it all in a relatively short period of time. Jose didn't see Ashley Cole as a reliable option any more which is understandable given his age. But instead of playing Ryan Bertrand, he moved Azpilicueta to LB. Ryan Bertrand would soon thereafter move to Southampton and show how good he really is. Had Mourinho kept these players (Mata and Lukaku especially) we probably would have won the league in 2013/14. Crippling losses to Sunderland, an annoying draw to West Ham hurt us that season. Fast forward to the next season we win the league and the League Cup which is great. But some more signs appear that hurt the squad's morale and ended up being his undoing. He introduced more youngsters into the squad this season. Ruben Loftus-Cheek being the most notable. Mourinho hypes this lad up. Saying he's going to be the greatest thing English football has seen. Expectations are so high for this kid. He's 18 going on 19 years old and he gets his first Champions League appearance. Wow this is really happening? We've got a special one on our hands here! Mourinho says that preseason that Dom Solanke, Izzy Brown and Ruben Loftus-Cheek will all be playing for England within 3 years. Ruben is the only one involved with the first team. He rarely plays throughout the season after that one Champions League appearance. There's no sign that Mourinho actually believes in him. It's been almost 3 years and none of them are close to playing for England. Solanke is close to leaving Chelsea, Izzy had an okay loan spell at Huddersfield and RLC is certainly going to leave on loan in the summer (Brighton have been linked). After losing 2-1 to Newcastle away, our form really dropped. A very underwhelming draw to Southampton, we beat West Ham but then get demolished 5-3 to Spurs at White Hart Lane. Our form for the remainder of the season was dire and we were lucky Man City or Arsenal couldn't keep up. In the FA Cup, we lose 4-2 in embarrassing fashion to Bradford City. A full day removed from Mourinho saying if Chelsea lose to Bradford City it would be a disgrace. In Champions League, Mourinho goes into the 2nd leg with a nice 1-1 away goal advantage v PSG. They go down to 10 men and still Mourinho got outclassed by Laurent Blanc of all people and we get eliminated. Mostly because we were set up not to lose rather than to actually try and kill the tie. They were quick and dangerous, we were slow and uninspiring and were set up like that. Hazard was basically playing LWB ahead of the LB Azpilicueta. It was more or less a 4-4-1 formation because Oscar was incredibly anonymous the entire match. Fast forward to our post season tour of Australia. We win 1-0 against Sydney FC in a friendly. Ruben Loftus-Cheek starts that match but was taken off after like 23 minutes. After the match, Mourinho took his moment during his press conference to absolutely shred Ruben to pieces talking about how bad he is off the ball and how he didn't care about playing for Chelsea and how he didn't take this serious enough. Again, it's a loving friendly and Jose is ripping him like it was the Champions League Semi Final. His final season at Chelsea. We start preseason strangely late. Middle of July. We lose 4-2 to New York Red Bulls who basically played all their kids because they had a match 2 days prior. We lose 1-0 to Fiorentina at home, 1-0 to Arsenal in the Charity Shield. Our best players Costa and Hazard come back fat and ineffective. We draw 2-2 to Swansea and Mourinho decides hey yanno what? gently caress THIS PHYISO WE GOT HERE. It's week 1 of the new season and he's already stirring poo poo up. The media turns it into a sexism thing because he apparently called her a filha da puta. Then reports of players leading a revolt and Fabregas trying to force Mourinho out, then Fabregas gets his license suspended, losses pile up and in his final press conference as Chelsea manager, he says he brought these players to a level they actually aren't and they betray his game plan. He's sacked, the pressure is on Louis van Gaal at Manchester United, he sits in his house in London waiting because he knows what job is about to open up. The bookies already make him the favourite for the job. Once he gets the job, media speculates about Juan Mata's future at United. Jose says no no no Mata is a great player. I need him here. I need him more now that I did at Chelsea (which is loving poo poo). He's playing and trusting more youth at United, he's patting the badge at United like he's already a legend, he's thrown shots at Chelsea and Chelsea fans. He dubbed himself Judas. Not the Chelsea fans. Many were/are okay with him going to United. All in all, he ruined some of our best talent or sold them elsewhere and Chelsea were left with lack of depth in the squad (still are really). I didn't think he expected us to win the league, but he's at United now with one of the most beloved players in recent Chelsea history. He's suddenly good enough in Jose's eyes but not at Chelsea. Oh and lest I forget. Before the 15/16 season started, Jose called Hazard better than Ronaldo, putting all this unnecessary pressure on him and then he goes and has the worst season anyone will ever see from a reigning Player of the Year. There's nothing to prove my theory but with hindsight, it makes perfect sense. He went back to Chelsea to prove himself in English football, and while there he managed to get revenge on Abramovich for everything that led to his departure the first time in 2007 by managing to let coveted prospects leave when they could have helped us, play poo poo football, fail in Champions League, barely get over the finish line in 14/15 and then go the full half a season 1 point above the relegation zone that allows Chelsea to wind up having it's worst season since the late 80s. Edit: TL;DR: Mourinho didn't want to fail at United, used Chelsea to reintegrate himself in the PL and tried to take the club down as revenge for his exit in 2007. He played the long game.
|
|
#
?
Jul 7, 2017 19:27
|
|
|
TLDR indeed
|
|
#
?
Jul 7, 2017 20:20
|
|
|
https://twitter.com/rogbennett/status/883677964780621824
|
|
#
?
Jul 8, 2017 14:30
|
|
|
lol  https://twitter.com/VICESports/status/883804455296049152
|
|
#
?
Jul 8, 2017 23:55
|
|
|
https://www.soccergenomics.com/dna-soccer-test/ Can't wait to see how many dumb Americans pay for this.
|
|
#
?
Jul 9, 2017 01:02
|
|
|
Jesus Christ. I like how the pretend like Fox News cutting away from the tifo in some way validates their complaint. As if it isn't more likely that fox would cut away for almost any other reason.
|
|
#
?
Jul 9, 2017 01:18
|
|
|
|
|
#
?
Jul 9, 2017 11:21
|
|
|
I mean they're all hosed up, but #5 
|
|
#
?
Jul 9, 2017 17:21
|
|
|
https://mobile.twitter.com/ChelseaFC/status/884064814150111233/video/1
|
|
#
?
Jul 9, 2017 18:20
|
|
|
Wow, dehumanizing and nonsensical
|
|
#
?
Jul 9, 2017 18:24
|
|
|
https://twitter.com/bubbaprog/status/883776888837156867?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw
|
|
#
?
Jul 9, 2017 20:22
|
|
|
lol no loving way, this has to be a parody
|
|
#
?
Jul 9, 2017 20:32
|
|
|
JFairfax posted:lol no loving way, this has to be a parody it's legit, Crazy Ted linked to their site upthread
|
|
#
?
Jul 9, 2017 21:02
|
|
|
Troy Queef posted:it's legit, Crazy Ted linked to their site upthread what the gently caress
|
|
#
?
Jul 9, 2017 21:32
|
|
|
Someone should get some Ronaldo DNA to see how it checks out
|
|
#
?
Jul 10, 2017 03:43
|
|
|
lmao what the actual gently caress
|
|
#
?
Jul 10, 2017 04:51
|
|
|
jre posted:what the gently caress JFairfax posted:lol no loving way, this has to be a parody There's travelling leagues out in suburbs in a lot places that have teams of seven-year-olds eight-year-olds and parents pay out the loving nose to put their kids in them. And that's just to try out for the teams lol Crazy Ted fucked around with this message at 06:25 on Jul 10, 2017 |
|
#
?
Jul 10, 2017 06:17
|
|
|
Hoooooooly poo poo. That is up there as the worst I've seen on here.
|
|
#
?
Jul 10, 2017 06:47
|
|
|
test results indicate your child Brioche needs a blood centrifuge as soon as possible, click here to purchase
|
|
#
?
Jul 10, 2017 09:15
|
|
|
this owns you racist
|
|
#
?
Jul 10, 2017 09:20
|
|
|
Good news: Your child has Messi-DNA Bad news: only the autism part
|
|
#
?
Jul 10, 2017 11:31
|
|
Enter sadman
|
saihttam posted:Good news: Your child has Messi-DNA Hey at least they're still pointing to the specific type of training your kid will need
|
|
#
?
Jul 10, 2017 15:40
|
|
|
TheBigAristotle posted:Hey at least they're still pointing to the specific type of training your kid will need Autists do love their trains.
|
|
#
?
Jul 10, 2017 20:09
|
|
|
TheBigAristotle posted:Hey at least they're still pointing to the specific type of training your kid will need
|
|
#
?
Jul 10, 2017 21:16
|
|
|
Just reading some replies to a tweet to see if anyone knew the answer and I find this gem. https://twitter.com/zoya78622/status/885590365931229186
|
|
#
?
Jul 13, 2017 22:21
|
|
|
Crazy Ted posted:In the US for the longest time it was seen as the sport rich people's kids took up so they could say they played sports but without having to get real dirty. Nah this isnt true
|
|
#
?
Jul 13, 2017 22:26
|
|
|
Wasn't "soccer" the sport of girls and dirty brown immigrants?
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2017 12:57
|
|
|
oliwan posted:Wasn't "soccer" the sport of girls and dirty brown immigrants? That was "sock her" and why there's so much trouble integrating.
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2017 13:01
|
|
|
Ninpo posted:That was "sock her" and why there's so much trouble integrating. Well you would know.
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2017 19:33
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 29, 2024 16:02 |
|
|
There is no particular reason to suggest Mourinho’s United are about to join these teams. But if they do it will be a triumph of uniquely burly, gnarled, gangling proportions.
|
|
#
?
Jul 15, 2017 00:55
|
|