|
Furnaceface posted:Keep it up because the Best 4th Line In Hockey is having a down year and you need to carry us to another Cup. I have eclipsed the top 350 hockey players in history, and I will not stop until I shatter every offensive record in NHL history and finish atop that list. EDIT: Upon further review, I don't seem to be on track to get ahead of Wayne Gretzky, and not by a long shot. God drat it, you loving Canadian bastard barnold fucked around with this message at 01:18 on Jul 7, 2017 |
#
?
Jul 7, 2017 01:15
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 10, 2024 00:00 |
|
|
even absurd video game hockey careers don't come withing spitting distance of most of gretzkys all-time records 
|
|
#
?
Jul 7, 2017 03:15
|
|
|
The question was: "What if there was a Tom Brady of hockey?" And the answer was: "He still wouldn't be as good as Wayne Gretzky."
|
|
#
?
Jul 7, 2017 03:48
|
|
|
fits posted:even absurd video game hockey careers don't come withing spitting distance of most of gretzkys all-time records yeah, it's reinforced how awesome he was every year Hockles does this
|
|
#
?
Jul 7, 2017 20:20
|
|
|
End of 2025-26 Regular Season Update  Transaction News None Notable Stats Aydin lead the NHL in Points, Poost was 3rd Poost lead the NHL in Goals, Thomas was 2nd, Athanatos was 3rd, Aydin was 4th Aydin lead the NHL in +/-, Poost was 4th Top 5 in PIM - Jemima, Biscuits, Ogilthorpe III, Potetson, O'Bourke Comments Aydin is going to win just about every award again Dundee is going to win the Jennings and probably the Vezina, maybe even the Hart or Lindsay Top 9 in PIM were all goons, so I can shut it down because it won't get any better than this http://tinyurl.com/NHL-Create-A-Goon-2017 for complete stats
|
|
#
?
Jul 8, 2017 08:16
|
|
|
Looks like good ol' Belarussian boy Floaty McPylon picked up another injury after the All-Star break, which probably was the root cause of LA missing the playoffs.  Still managed to be the top goon producing D and 4th out of all goons in P/G, though. He good.
|
|
#
?
Jul 8, 2017 08:35
|
|
|
Poost and Aydin gonna win another loving cup for the Bs. God drat it.
|
|
#
?
Jul 8, 2017 12:09
|
|
|
Potetson is still the goon with most games played. Not bad for being a career fourth liner.
|
|
#
?
Jul 8, 2017 16:29
|
|
|
Oh is Toronto back to making the playoffs so they can disappoint everyone involved in a different way this time? *spits*
|
|
#
?
Jul 8, 2017 19:01
|
|
|
DFL
|
|
#
?
Jul 8, 2017 19:11
|
|
|
NYI gonna win the Cup, playing 7 games in every round before hoisting the Stanley
|
|
#
?
Jul 8, 2017 19:31
|
|
|
colorado noooo
|
|
#
?
Jul 8, 2017 19:47
|
|
|
fits posted:colorado noooo We need to run AJ off the team, you poo poo is his locker, I'll let 3 psi out of each of his tires per day.
|
|
#
?
Jul 9, 2017 01:08
|
|
|
Athanatos posted:We need to run AJ off the team, you poo poo is his locker, I'll let 3 psi out of each of his tires per day. 6 more years 
|
|
#
?
Jul 9, 2017 01:58
|
|
|
Come on Toronto
|
|
#
?
Jul 9, 2017 04:05
|
|
|
End of 2025-26 Season Update NHL Awards Stanley Cup Champions San Jose Sharks Presidents Trophy (Best Regular Season Record) Columbus Blue Jackets Art Ross Trophy (Most Points) Quayden Aydin -- Boston Bruins Hart Memorial Trophy (League MVP) Quayden Aydin -- Boston Bruins James Norris Memorial Trophy (Best Defenseman) Seth Jones -- Columbus Blue Jackets Lady Byng Memorial Trophy (Best Sportsmanship & Gentlemanly Conduct) Quayden Aydin -- Boston Bruins Calder Memorial Trophy (Rookie of the Year) M. Abney -- Chicago Blackhawks Conn Smythe Trophy (Playoff MVP) J. Van Pottelberghe -- San Jose Sharks Vezina Trophy (Best Goaltender) Aejix Dundee -- Minnesota Wild William M. Jennings Trophy (Goalie(s) on team with fewest Goals Against) Aejix Dundee -- Minnesota Wild Bill Masterton Memorial Trophy (Perserverence, Sportsmanship & Dedication to hockey) Martin Marincin -- Calgary Flames Frank J. Selke Trophy (Best Defensive Forward) Quayden Aydin -- Boston Bruins Ted Lindsay Award (League MVP as voted by NHLPA) Quayden Aydin -- Boston Bruins Maurice "Rocket" Richard Trophy (Most Goals) Jus Poost -- Boston Bruins  Upcoming Free Agents ARZ -- Scott Johns BOS -- Quayden Aydin COL -- Soup Athanatos DAL -- Potatoes O'Bourke FLA -- Bernie Sanders LA -- Floaty McPylon MTL -- Stanley Matthews III NSH -- Guy Fieri NJ -- Miracle Johnson NYI -- Nippon Ichi NYR -- Kaido Hoovelson PHI -- Bubba Biscuits PIT -- Ogie Ogilthorpe III TOR -- Aldrig Glomma VAN -- Jack Bauer WSH -- Puck Sonette Comments Yes, almost everybody won the same award again. Bortnik wins a Cup! Nobody changed teams this season, maybe it will happen in the offseason... http://tinyurl.com/NHL-Create-A-Goon-2017 for complete stats Hockles fucked around with this message at 06:23 on Jul 9, 2017 |
|
#
?
Jul 9, 2017 05:47
|
|
|
For the love of god, Puck, sign with another team.
|
|
#
?
Jul 9, 2017 05:58
|
|
|
this poo poo is loving rigged I didn't win a single trophy this year also I'm laughing my rear end off at a ECF involving the Islanders and the Panthers. this simulation is truly gold
|
|
#
?
Jul 9, 2017 23:49
|
|
|
Bernie got so close to a cup. Oh well
|
|
#
?
Jul 10, 2017 02:10
|
|
|
bavel in the playoffs: 10 goals, 0 assists. that's my boy right there. that's my big brave boy all growed up 
|
|
#
?
Jul 10, 2017 02:21
|
|
|
2026 Offseason News Notable Retirements Sidney Crosby John Tavares Jakub Voracek Logan Couture Jordan Staal James van Riemsdyk Roman Josi Chris Kreider Sami Vatanen Ryan Ellis Sergei Bobrovsky Jake Allen Full Lists: http://imgur.com/a/yuhYp -- http://imgur.com/a/ad7W4 -- http://imgur.com/a/b9RfY Transaction News BOS -- re-signed Quayden Aydin to a $43.9mil/4yr contract COL -- re-signed Soup Athanatos to a $34.2mil/4yr contract DAL -- re-signed Potatoes O'Bourke to a $10.1mil/2yr contract FLA -- re-signed Bernie Sanders to a $9.9mil/2yr contract LA -- re-signed Floaty McPylon to a $11.5mil/2yr contract MTL -- re-signed Stanley Matthews III to a $15.8mil/3yr contract NSH -- re-signed Guy Fieri to a $8.2mil/2yr contract NYI -- re-signed Nippon Ichi to a $2.9mil/1yr contract NYR -- re-signed Kaido Hoovelson to a $12mil/3yr contract PHI -- re-signed Bubba Biscuits to a $2.7mil/1yr contract TOR -- re-signed Aldrig Glomma to a $2.3mil/2yr contract VAN -- re-signed Jack Bauer to a $12.6mil/3yr contract WSH -- re-signed Puck Sonette to a $9.3mil/2yr contract CAR -- signed UFA Scott Johns to $2.4mil/2yr contract CAR -- signed UFA Miracle Johnson to a $1.2mil/1yr contract FLA -- signed UFA Ogie Ogilthorpe III to a $1.5mil/1yr contract 2026-27 Opening Night Info ARZ -- Southie Paux is a 3rd SCR Line FWD BOS -- Quayden Aydin is a 1st Line FWD BOS -- Jus Poost is a 1st Line FWD CAR -- Gord Gordon is a 2nd Line FWD CAR -- assigned Scott Johns to Charlotte in the AHL, his role is 4th Line FWD CAR -- Miracle Johnson is a 4th Line FWD COL -- Soup Athanatos is 1st Line FWD COL -- Aunt Jemima is a 1st Line FWD COL -- assigned Taro Tsujimoto to San Antonio in the AHL, his role is Other FWD CBJ -- Coach Hockles is a 1st Line FWD DAL -- Anders Potetson is a 3rd CHK Line FWD DAL -- Potatoes O'Bourke is a Top 4 DEF FLA -- Ogie Ogilthorpe III is a 4th Line FWD FLA -- Bernie Sanders is a 2nd Line FWD LA -- Floaty McPylon is a Top 4 DEF MIN -- Aejix Dundee is an Elite Goalie MTL -- Stanley Matthews III is a 2nd Line FWD MTL -- Cruz McBroozer is a 2nd Line FWD NSH -- Guy Fieri is a 3rd SCR Line FWD NJ -- Danny Provolone is a Top 6 DEF NYI -- Nippon Ichi is a 3rd CHK Line FWD NYI -- Touchdown Thomas is a 1st Line FWD NYR -- Ewic Windros is a 2nd Line FWD NYR -- Kaido Hoovelson is a Top 6 DEF PHI -- Stabby McStabson is a Depth FWD PHI -- Bubba Biscuits is a 3rd CHK Line FWD PHI -- Hugh Jass is a Top 4 DEF SJ -- Bavel Bortnik is a Top 2 DEF TB -- Yokozuna is an Elite Goalie TOR -- Aldrig Glomma is a 4th Line FWD TOR -- Gord Murphy is a Top 2 DEF VAN -- assigned Jeremiah ThinkTank to Utica in the AHL, his role is Other FWD VAN -- Jack Bauer is a 3rd CHK Line FWD WSH -- Puck Sonette is a 3rd CHK Line FWD WPG -- Mulkku Paskiainen is an Elite Goalie Comments A few players find new homes People are starting to get demoted back to the AHL...
|
|
#
?
Jul 10, 2017 03:38
|
|
|
gently caress Colorado, I want out of here, what a crock of poo poo organization. Nobody in their right mind would want to be there. Such a poo poo show. "Sir we want to give you 34 million dollars" Home sweet home, Colorado.
|
|
#
?
Jul 10, 2017 04:01
|
|
|
I negotiate own contract, I say I want 11.5 million American dollars per year. Guy says okay, gives me contract to sign. Turns out I fail to read, only get 11.5 million American dollars over 2 years! ебать!
|
|
#
?
Jul 10, 2017 04:17
|
|
|
Man, poor Gordie I don't think has made it out of the first round once as a Hurricane.
|
|
#
?
Jul 10, 2017 04:58
|
|
|
Nippon get a pay raise and moved up to the third line after a good playoff run. 
|
|
#
?
Jul 10, 2017 11:57
|
|
|
evidently instead of Huge Erik Karlsson i have instead become Huge Brendan Smith
|
|
#
?
Jul 10, 2017 20:19
|
|
|
looks like miracle man is on the "journeyman/retired by 30" career path
|
|
#
?
Jul 10, 2017 20:21
|
|
|
Goddamnit, Puck.
|
|
#
?
Jul 10, 2017 20:36
|
|
|
has yokozuna seriously never played a playoff game e: oh there's the correct tab well i'm still outraged at his middling team checksin fucked around with this message at 22:04 on Jul 10, 2017 |
|
#
?
Jul 10, 2017 22:01
|
|
|
Furnaceface posted:Nippon get a pay raise and moved up to the third line after a good playoff run. keep up the good work grinding it out on the ice, we need more of that in this glorious Islanders franchise
|
|
#
?
Jul 10, 2017 23:53
|
|
|
Agent Jack Bauer got a pay raise!  Keep scoring goals and being a pain in the rear end to play against, Jack. 
|
|
#
?
Jul 11, 2017 22:26
|
|
|
Bernie got a little money and moved up to the second line after almost winning a cup (which was rigged btw, Bernie would have won, if he was on the first line). After years of toiling away largely unnoticed, you might say that now people are beginning to feel the bern
|
|
#
?
Jul 12, 2017 18:33
|
|
|
2027 All-Star Break Update  All-Stars Pacific - Bavel Bortnik (4th selection) *(will not play due to injury) Pacific - Floaty McPylon (4th selection) Central - Aunt Jemima (6th selection) Central - Aejix Dundee (5th selection) Central -- Mulkku Paskiainen (2nd selection) Atlantic - Quayden Aydin (5th selection) Atlantic - Jus Poost (6th selection) Atlantic - Yokozuna (3rd selection) Metropolitan - Touchdown Thomas (7th selection) Metropolitan - Coach Hockles (2nd selection) Transaction News 1/21/27 - NYI placed Nippon Ichi on waivers 1/21/27 - CAR claimed Nippon Ichi off waivers Notable Stats Aydin leads the NHL in Points, Thomas is 2nd, Poost is 4th Thomas leads the NHL in Goals, Poost is 2nd, Aydin is 3rd, Hockles is 4th Aydin is 2nd in +/-, Bortnik is 3rd, Poost is 4th Biscuits leads the NHL in PIM, O'Bourke is 2nd, Potetson is 3rd, Ogilthorpe is 4th, Windros is 5th Sonette is 3rd in Hits, Murphy is 5th Comments Lots of All-Stars this year Bortnik will miss another ASG, this time with an MCL strain Carolina is assembling a team of goons http://tinyurl.com/NHL-Create-A-Goon-2017 for complete stats
|
|
#
?
Jul 12, 2017 20:02
|
|
|
Bubbers is back to what he does best: take dumb penalties. My boy. Trade him to Carolina too I guess if that's gonna be goon central. Bubba can eat BBQ and cheap shot people, it's what he was born to do.
|
|
#
?
Jul 12, 2017 20:59
|
|
|
Still tiny, still angry. 
|
|
#
?
Jul 12, 2017 23:35
|
|
|
Toronto wasted no time digging to the bottom after a terrible fluke playoff appearance, huh?
|
|
#
?
Jul 13, 2017 01:04
|
|
|
lol my career is doomed
|
|
#
?
Jul 13, 2017 01:13
|
|
|
What the gently caress Islanders? You will regret giving up on Nippon.  e: Oh hey, 2 other goons on the Canes. We got this poo poo guys. 
Furnaceface fucked around with this message at 02:37 on Jul 13, 2017 |
|
#
?
Jul 13, 2017 02:34
|
|
|
Furnaceface posted:What the gently caress Islanders? god damnit I have been left stranded in New York, sitting alone in the locker room as faces I don't recognize pass by. how could they do this? the 7th all-star game feels more hollow than ever as my only real friend, Nippon Ichi, no longer rides the ice with me
|
|
#
?
Jul 13, 2017 12:20
|
|
|
|
| # ? May 10, 2024 00:00 |
|
|
the rangers are bad, i am bad, and hockey is bad
|
|
#
?
Jul 14, 2017 01:26
|
|