NBA Offseason G/V: Let Me Hear You Post It

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > NBA Offseason G/V: Let Me Hear You Post It

What is going to be your favorite offseason storyline? This poll is closed.
The Big3 Tourney	67	22.41%
Will Lakers draft Ball	40	13.38%
Where will the Pauls go	54	18.06%
Will LeBron jump ship to the Spurs or ??	41	13.71%
Will every team in the league just pivot towards tanking	97	32.44%
Total:	210 votes

[Edit Poll (moderators only)]

NickRoweFillea: Sep 27, 2012; doin thangs

My friend who got married yesterday wrote his own vows. He's from Oklahoma, and his wife said "I promise to never forgive Kevin Durant" as a part of hers. 🐍🐍🐍

# ? Jul 16, 2017 18:42

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# ? Jun 5, 2024 18:40

leftist heap: Feb 28, 2013; Fun Shoe

Metapod posted:

Counterpoint Ryan Anderson has NBA skills Myers Leonard does not know how to play the game thus dumping Leonard plus harkless for ryno would be good

The last thing Portland needs is another guy getting $18 million a year to not play defense.

# ? Jul 16, 2017 18:43

leftist heap: Feb 28, 2013; Fun Shoe

NickRoweFillea posted:

My friend who got married yesterday wrote his own vows. He's from Oklahoma, and his wife said "I promise to never forgive Kevin Durant" as a part of hers. 🐍🐍🐍

Congrats to Metapod on his nuptials

# ? Jul 16, 2017 18:43

EvanTH: Apr 24, 2004; i like to express my inner pain by being really boring on the phone
or just when i'm kickin it
that's me though
i'm kind of oddddddd

I keep forgetting the Twolfs got Butler and Thibs now. Barring injury congratulations Sacramento Kings (2006), you now have the longest playoff drought among current NBA teams

RIP to the footnote that the longest playoff drought record holder has been in the playoffs more recently than the Seattle SuperSonics (2005)

# ? Jul 16, 2017 18:45

Metapod: Mar 18, 2012

NickRoweFillea posted:

My friend who got married yesterday wrote his own vows. He's from Oklahoma, and his wife said "I promise to never forgive Kevin Durant" as a part of hers. 🐍🐍🐍

Your friend is marrying a good person

leftist heap posted:

The last thing Portland needs is another guy getting $18 million a year to not play defense.

This is fair

leftist heap posted:

Congrats to Metapod on his nuptials

Lol

# ? Jul 16, 2017 18:52

WhyteRyce: Dec 30, 2001

Dwight on fire this off season
https://twitter.com/dwighthoward/status/886607007456911360

# ? Jul 16, 2017 18:58

Mr. Mambold: Feb 13, 2011; Aha. Nice post.

NickRoweFillea posted:

My friend who got married yesterday wrote his own vows. He's from Oklahoma, and his wife said "I promise to never forgive Kevin Durant" as a part of hers. 🐍🐍🐍

ffs

# ? Jul 16, 2017 19:03

Spacebump: Dec 24, 2003; Dallas Mavericks: Generations

Hashtag Banterzone posted:

But I disagree about Portland being dumb targeting Melo. Lillard/CJ/Nurkic + Melo is a top 4 seed. And if he walks next summer then Portland is out of the luxury tax.

I wouldn't be quick to call them a top 4 seed. They might be able to but that defense might be hard to watch.

# ? Jul 16, 2017 19:10

Tae: Oct 24, 2010; Hello? Can you hear me? ...Perhaps if I shout? AAAAAAAAAH!

In what world is a team with almost no defense better than the Rockets, Spurs, or Thunder. Unless Nurkic is Rudy Gobert but better.

# ? Jul 16, 2017 19:13

Femur: Jan 10, 2004; I REALLY NEED TO SHUT THE FUCK UP

Hashtag Banterzone posted:

I wouldn't be surprised of the new GM sits tight for a bit and figures that Melo is going to start getting desperate and will waive his no trade clause for more teams.

Why would Melo get desperate. He's right where he wants to be. It's the knicks that want to get rid of him, who knows why. They still got allan Houston hanging around, infamous for representing a rule change allowing cutting of useless fat. so why would they care about wasting money on useless players now? It seems that shadow GM mills, is the one desperate to get rid of melo, and hes gonna look like an joke if melo is still around to represents who has the power in that building.

# ? Jul 16, 2017 19:24

DeimosRising: Oct 17, 2005; �Hola SEA!

Hashtag Banterzone posted:

But I disagree about Portland being dumb targeting Melo. Lillard/CJ/Nurkic + Melo is a top 4 seed. And if he walks next summer then Portland is out of the luxury tax.

I doubt it but you're correct that it's a trade where if it doesn't work and he walks, you still win in terms of flexibility, a la the George trade for OKC.

I don't hate Melo as much as some people but I don't think that this whole thing improves Houston measurably. If you want a guy who can create medium to low efficiency shots by isoing, just post up Ryan Anderson he's as good at that as Melo is at facing a guy up and jab stepping and dribbling for 20 seconds. Best case Melo gets some really easy 3s and is a wash on offense, and on a prayer he changes everything he's ever been, tries on defense and is good immediately despite not having done it in a decade. Honestly Houston might be gunning for him to opt out too.

# ? Jul 16, 2017 19:38

Ammanas: Jul 17, 2005; Voltes V: "Laser swooooooooord!"

NickRoweFillea posted:

My friend who got married yesterday wrote his own vows. He's from Oklahoma, and his wife said "I promise to never forgive Kevin Durant" as a part of hers. 🐍🐍🐍

your friend just got owned by kd tho. dude was at his wedding

# ? Jul 16, 2017 19:47

Libertine: Jun 21, 2004; When I die, I hope they say I made the eSports industry a better place than I made millions of dollars.

Hashtag Banterzone posted:

But I disagree about Portland being dumb targeting Melo. Lillard/CJ/Nurkic + Melo is a top 4 seed. And if he walks next summer then Portland is out of the luxury tax.

Nothing that Portland can do can make them a Top 4 seed in the West. They have vastly too much salary tied up in mediocre/dead-weight/one-way players. The team is completely flawed.

There is a huge gap between them and Warriors/Spurs/Rockets/Thunder and most of the teams around them in the standings have made much better offseason moves than them.

E: Most recent Vegas odds have Portland as 11th out of 15th in the West ahead of only Phoenix, Sacramento, and Dallas.

Libertine fucked around with this message at 19:51 on Jul 16, 2017

# ? Jul 16, 2017 19:49

DeimosRising: Oct 17, 2005; �Hola SEA!

Libertine posted:

Nothing that Portland can do can make them a Top 4 seed in the West. They have vastly too much salary tied up in mediocre/dead-weight/one-way players. The team is completely flawed.

There is a huge gap between them and Warriors/Spurs/Rockets/Thunder and most of the teams around them in the standings have made much better offseason moves than them.

E: Most recent Vegas odds have Portland as 11th out of 15th in the West ahead of only Phoenix, Sacramento, and Dallas.

Nurkic becoming a star would do it but I think their late season run with him was only half improvement, half the annual end of year mediocre team explosion. But it's probably true that 3rd year Nurkic, if healthy, is the best defensive anchor they've had since...Oden? Rasheed Wallace? And that will have a big impact on the apparent defense of Lillard and McCollum. In a year with fewer ridiculous teams I could see it but not this year.

# ? Jul 16, 2017 20:02

rjmccall: Sep 7, 2007; no worries friend; Fun Shoe

Ammanas posted:

your friend just got owned by kd tho. dude was at his wedding

Yeah, this.

# ? Jul 16, 2017 20:03

EvanTH: Apr 24, 2004; i like to express my inner pain by being really boring on the phone
or just when i'm kickin it
that's me though
i'm kind of oddddddd

Femur posted:

Why would Melo get desperate. He's right where he wants to be. It's the knicks that want to get rid of him, who knows why. They still got allan Houston hanging around, infamous for representing a rule change allowing cutting of useless fat. so why would they care about wasting money on useless players now? It seems that shadow GM mills, is the one desperate to get rid of melo, and hes gonna look like an joke if melo is still around to represents who has the power in that building.

?

1- Melo doesn't want to play on the Knicks and obviously hasn't wanted to for a while.

2- He needs to be traded ASAP, preferably several years ago, because he lowers his own trade value with every possession he plays. Some people still mistakenly think he's good, move him now before they catch on.

3- Every member of the Knicks front office is already a joke

4- I think it's more like Dolan is the only one who wants Melo to stay

# ? Jul 16, 2017 21:08

Blind Pineapple: Oct 27, 2010; For The Perfect Fruit 'n' Kaman

1 part gin
1 part pomegranate syrup
Fill with pineapple juice
Serve over crushed ice; College Slice

Libertine posted:

E: Most recent Vegas odds have Portland as 11th out of 15th in the West ahead of only Phoenix, Sacramento, and Dallas.

I assume the Lakers are also beneath them too. I wouldn't be surprised if Portland's an 8-seed again honestly. They still have a good 1-2 guard punch and Nurkic seemed to fit in well at the end of last season. Obviously Minnesota is going to take one spot, and I'd take NO over Portland as far as teams with flawed rosters but a couple good players go. Utah's definitely going back to the mediocrity pile without Hayward and Hill. Memphis has been declining the last couple of years and I don't see that trend changing, I think they're out too. It depends on how the Clippers hold up without Chris Paul for a full season. If Blake misses significant time, the door's wide open for Portland to make the playoffs again.

# ? Jul 16, 2017 21:11

Spacebump: Dec 24, 2003; Dallas Mavericks: Generations

Libertine posted:

E: Most recent Vegas odds have Portland as 11th out of 15th in the West ahead of only Phoenix, Sacramento, and Dallas.

If Vegas has the Mavs finishing 14th in the West. Bet on the Mavs. I've mentioned this a few times already but when they were healthy last year they won at a good clip. They should be better this year now that they won't be wasting time with Bogut or old DWill. (and every point guard will presumably not be hurt at the same time again.)

Spacebump fucked around with this message at 21:19 on Jul 16, 2017

# ? Jul 16, 2017 21:15

Fast Luck: Feb 2, 1988

the mean lunch lady posted:

Does Greg Oden actually play?

Nope. Would've been cool. I wonder if he'll be physically on the bench next week, I think round 3 is supposed to be on ESPN.

# ? Jul 16, 2017 21:18

NickRoweFillea: Sep 27, 2012; doin thangs

https://twitter.com/bportistime/status/886399857799417861

R.D. Mangles

# ? Jul 16, 2017 21:31

AggressivelyStupid: Jan 9, 2012

they look like poo poo

# ? Jul 16, 2017 21:35

Nissin Cup Nudist: Sep 3, 2011; Sleep with one eye open

We're off to Gritty Gritty land

Spike Eskin is officiating the wedding of the dude who proposed at the lottery party

# ? Jul 16, 2017 21:41

Femur: Jan 10, 2004; I REALLY NEED TO SHUT THE FUCK UP

EvanTH posted:

?

1- Melo doesn't want to play on the Knicks and obviously hasn't wanted to for a while.

2- He needs to be traded ASAP, preferably several years ago, because he lowers his own trade value with every possession he plays. Some people still mistakenly think he's good, move him now before they catch on.

3- Every member of the Knicks front office is already a joke

4- I think it's more like Dolan is the only one who wants Melo to stay

But that's what I mean, the FO is already a joke, and has never had problems overpaying players, so why is it a problem now? And because they are a joke, they are amongst the last to realize Carmelo's waning value, none withstanding the damage they inflicted themselves this year, which was essentially throwing Melo under the bus for all of their other dumbass moves.

Now they gonna look dumb for trading him for negative value, or by prostrating themselves in front of Melo to welcome him back. the news is already that they are seeking for a meeting with Melo, with him acting cold. power move.

Melo has never said he wanted out, he picked 2 teams with nothing to trade. The continuing Houston thing is only a signal to the knicks that they need to curtsy a little lower.

melos just gonna be smirking at the FO the whole year, at their impotence. Thats the humiliation he's gonna inflict hanging around, not how dumb they are, which is already known.

Femur fucked around with this message at 21:55 on Jul 16, 2017

# ? Jul 16, 2017 21:51

ChickenMedium: Sep 2, 2001; Forum Veteran And Professor Emeritus of Condiment Studies

AggressivelyStupid posted:

they look like poo poo

They're $600? Jesus, Lonzo Ball's Obe Ryant 1s seem like a steal

# ? Jul 16, 2017 21:58

Shear Modulus: Jun 9, 2010

i dunno $600 seems like a good deal for a doctor's appointment and a cast imo

# ? Jul 16, 2017 22:06

R.D. Mangles: Jan 10, 2004

denzel stealing a medical pad and writing out a prescription for zipser's bone shoes

# ? Jul 16, 2017 22:08

straight up brolic: Jan 31, 2007; After all, I was nice in ball,
Came to practice weed scented
Report card like the speed limit

they aren't basketball shoes. Denzel Valentine looks like an idiot in them

# ? Jul 16, 2017 22:25

straight up brolic: Jan 31, 2007; After all, I was nice in ball,
Came to practice weed scented
Report card like the speed limit

https://twitter.com/nickswagypyoung/status/886282928119988224

# ? Jul 16, 2017 22:25

Papercut: Aug 24, 2005

Hashtag Banterzone posted:

But I disagree about Portland being dumb targeting Melo. Lillard/CJ/Nurkic + Melo is a top 4 seed.

In the East.

Maybe.

# ? Jul 16, 2017 22:27

straight up brolic: Jan 31, 2007; After all, I was nice in ball,
Came to practice weed scented
Report card like the speed limit

Nurkic wasn't even that good in the small sample of games that he was good for Portland and he's constantly injured.

He is a good fit for them though

# ? Jul 16, 2017 22:32

Kibner: Oct 21, 2008; Acguy Supremacy

leftist heap posted:

The last thing Portland needs is another guy getting $18 million a year to not play defense.

At least this one is a good scorer.

# ? Jul 16, 2017 22:33

AggressivelyStupid: Jan 9, 2012

ChickenMedium posted:

They're $600? Jesus, Lonzo Ball's Obe Ryant 1s seem like a steal

I'm going to run down to the VA and steal like 10 pairs of these

Sell em for 300 each

# ? Jul 16, 2017 22:40

Spacebump: Dec 24, 2003; Dallas Mavericks: Generations

JaVale is mad Nick Young is taking all his money.

"At this point, the best recourse is bringing back JaVale McGee. But one source said he is not happy with the Warriors for not giving him a shot at the starting slot and giving all of the mid-level to free agent guard Nick Young. McGee believed his play this season earned him more minutes and money, and is looking for that on the market."
http://www.mercurynews.com/2017/07/14/warriors-question-marks-centers-youngsters-joe-lacobs-blood-pressure/

# ? Jul 16, 2017 22:46

Two Tone Shoes: Jan 2, 2009; All that's missing is the ring.

The loss of Javale McGee's 10-15 minutes a game will be the Warriors' downfall this season, mark my words!

# ? Jul 16, 2017 22:50

Shear Modulus: Jun 9, 2010

look i love it when guards dance through defenders and move with grace on the court but i cant see the need for denzel to wear ballet slippers and pli� when he passes

# ? Jul 16, 2017 22:51

EvanTH: Apr 24, 2004; i like to express my inner pain by being really boring on the phone
or just when i'm kickin it
that's me though
i'm kind of oddddddd

Femur posted:

But that's what I mean, the FO is already a joke, and has never had problems overpaying players, so why is it a problem now? And because they are a joke, they are amongst the last to realize Carmelo's waning value, none withstanding the damage they inflicted themselves this year, which was essentially throwing Melo under the bus for all of their other dumbass moves.

Now they gonna look dumb for trading him for negative value, or by prostrating themselves in front of Melo to welcome him back. the news is already that they are seeking for a meeting with Melo, with him acting cold. power move.

Melo has never said he wanted out, he picked 2 teams with nothing to trade. The continuing Houston thing is only a signal to the knicks that they need to curtsy a little lower.

melos just gonna be smirking at the FO the whole year, at their impotence. Thats the humiliation he's gonna inflict hanging around, not how dumb they are, which is already known.

None of that makes sense man. They've historically done the wrong thing so it's only right to keep doing the wrong thing? "Throwing under the bus" is the dumbest phrase on the planet. Thanks mid-00s Reality TV for the rise of that one. Most of the current situation is because of his no-trade clause. Blame Dolan, Melo or Phil Jackson for that. Blame Melo for being a terrible player who squanders all of his talent by playing like a loving moron.

Trading him for literally anything at all is positive value because he's a negative player who takes up a huge amount of cap space. They would be smart if they could pull that off. Trading Melo for a single 2nd round pick would be a positive move. Amnestying him would be a neutral-ish move to improve the team.

He's spent the last few years playing like he doesn't at all care to be playing basketball. I'm not sure what all the "humiliation" and "curtsying" stuff is, it sounds sexual. The Knicks haven't been a sex-appeal team since they got rid of Kurt Thomas, Pablo Prigioni, Chris Copeland and Tyson Chandler.

Speaking of historically bad GM moves, can someone remind me why the Mavs traded away their entire championship roster?

EvanTH fucked around with this message at 22:55 on Jul 16, 2017

# ? Jul 16, 2017 22:53

Punkin Spunkin: Jan 1, 2010

https://mobile.twitter.com/DwightHoward/status/886611218550706176
Lol

# ? Jul 16, 2017 22:56

Shear Modulus: Jun 9, 2010

Punkin Spunkin posted:

https://mobile.twitter.com/DwightHoward/status/886611218550706176
Lol

that guy just guaranteed that dwight is gonna sign with the warriors for the vet minimum in a couple years

# ? Jul 16, 2017 22:59

Doltos: Dec 28, 2005; 🤌🤌🤌

EvanTH posted:

Speaking of historically bad GM moves, can someone remind me why the Mavs traded away their entire championship roster?

They were all old and that championship team was a fluke anyway

# ? Jul 16, 2017 23:03

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# ? Jun 5, 2024 18:40

Spacebump: Dec 24, 2003; Dallas Mavericks: Generations

EvanTH posted:

Speaking of historically bad GM moves, can someone remind me why the Mavs traded away their entire championship roster?

They didn't trade anyone, they simply didn't resign Chandler, Barea, Butler, and DSteve. I will give you not resigning Chandler and Barea was a terrible move. Losing Butler and DSteve wasn't. Turns out Cuban attempting to collude with CP3 and Dwight was a bad idea.

Doltos posted:

They were all old and that championship team was a fluke anyway

That team was no fluke. If they didn't have injuries during the season (especially Dirk), they would have been respected more going into the playoffs. However many people were being lazy and following the media narrative that we were going to get LAL vs Miami.

Spacebump fucked around with this message at 23:06 on Jul 16, 2017

# ? Jul 16, 2017 23:04

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