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I just want to point out: 1) Juice's numbers were terrible this year. 2) There are three goons in the top 100. Two of them have been on the same line for the last decade
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Aug 5, 2017 13:48
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EWIC WINDROS IS BACK IN THE PWAYOFFS
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Aug 5, 2017 15:08
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Hockles posted:CGY gets: Gord Murphy 
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Aug 5, 2017 19:24
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End of 2030-31 Season Update NHL Awards Stanley Cup Champions Los Angeles Kings Presidents Trophy (Best Regular Season Record) Los Angeles Kings Art Ross Trophy (Most Points) Floaty McPylon -- Los Angeles Kings Hart Memorial Trophy (League MVP) Floaty McPylon -- Los Angeles Kings James Norris Memorial Trophy (Best Defenseman) Floaty McPylon -- Los Angeles Kings Lady Byng Memorial Trophy (Best Sportsmanship & Gentlemanly Conduct) Floaty McPylon -- Los Angeles Kings Calder Memorial Trophy (Rookie of the Year) O. Buzek -- Colorado Avalanche Conn Smythe Trophy (Playoff MVP) H. Klotz -- Los Angeles Kings Vezina Trophy (Best Goaltender) H. Klotz -- Los Angeles Kings William M. Jennings Trophy (Goalie(s) on team with fewest Goals Against) H. Klotz -- Los Angeles Kings Bill Masterton Memorial Trophy (Perserverence, Sportsmanship & Dedication to hockey) E. Rasanen -- Montreal Canadiens Frank J. Selke Trophy (Best Defensive Forward) T. Smithson -- Montreal Canadiens Ted Lindsay Award (League MVP as voted by NHLPA) Floaty McPylon -- Los Angeles Kings Maurice "Rocket" Richard Trophy (Most Goals) Touchdown Thomas -- New York Islanders Upcoming Free Agents DAL -- Anders Potetson NYI -- Touchdown Thomas NYR -- Ewic Windros PHI -- Hugh Jass PIT -- Aldrig Glomma TB -- Yokozuna WSH -- Puck Sonette Jeremiah ThinkTank Guy Fieri Taro Tsujimoto Scott Johns Miracle Johnson Comments As expected, McPylon wins all of the awards this year, but didn't continue his dominance in the playoffs. Their goalie carried them to the Cup. I don't expect much movement in the offseason this time. Probably a few more retirements. http://tinyurl.com/NHL-Create-A-Goon-2017 for complete stats
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Aug 5, 2017 19:49
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Windros with 29 PIM in 5 playoff games. I hope he killed at least 4 people
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Aug 5, 2017 20:11
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taro tsujumoto is still available in free agency! call now, operators are standing by!
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Aug 5, 2017 21:46
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fits posted:taro tsujumoto is still available in free agency! call now, operators are standing by! 
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Aug 5, 2017 22:10
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Puck is gonna retire a Cap. Cupless and aimlessly wandering forever.
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Aug 5, 2017 22:27
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First d-man to win the Hart since Pronger in 2000. First d-man to win the Ted Lindsay since Bobby Orr in 1975. Another Cup. Another Lady Byng. No second Conn Smythe, but that's the only thing Belarussian Superstar Floaty McPylon missed out on this season. Only 29 years old, too. One of the best d-men ever with a few good years still ahead for him. 
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Aug 5, 2017 22:36
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Gord "Gordie" Gordon is a career Hurricane which is kinda cool but man, he had that one amazing year with the All-Star selection and going point per game in the Playoffs and nearly winning the cup, but him and Carolina just can't compete against the Goon Superstars =(
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Aug 5, 2017 22:45
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Yaya posted:Gord "Gordie" Gordon is a career Hurricane which is kinda cool but man, he had that one amazing year with the All-Star selection and going point per game in the Playoffs and nearly winning the cup, but him and Carolina just can't compete against the Goon Superstars =( Be thankful. Poor Nippon left Carolina thinking anything could be better and ended up in Anaheim which appears to be currently run by player-coach Kevin Bieksa.
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Aug 6, 2017 01:02
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there's always next year, Tommy....... 
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Aug 6, 2017 01:52
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Holy poo poo, hugh can actually get away! Go!
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Aug 6, 2017 02:00
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2031 Offseason News Notable Retirements Alex Galchenyuk Filip Forsberg Johnny Gaudreau Mark Sheifele Max Domi William Nylander JT Compher Andrei Vasilesvskiy Matt Murray Full Lists: http://imgur.com/a/AUlxe - http://imgur.com/a/IRaBq - http://imgur.com/a/sRjKf Transaction News NYI -- re-signed Touchdown Thomas to a $56.1mil/5yr contract NYR -- re-signed Ewic Windros to a $16mil/2yr contract PHI -- re-signed Hugh Jass to a $21.3mil3yr contract TB -- re-signed Yokozuna to a $44/8mil/4yr contract WSH -- re-signed Puck Sonette to a $10.2mil/2yr contract WSH -- signed Aldrig Glomma to a $1.9mil/1yr contract EDM -- signed Anders Potetson to a $4.5mil/2yr contract Unsigned Ogie Ogilthorpe III Jeremiah ThinkTank Guy Fieri Taro Tsujimoto Scott Johns Miracle Johnson 2031-32 Opening Night Info ANA -- Nippon Ichi is a 3rd CHK Line FWD ARZ -- Southie Paux is a 2nd Line FWD BOS -- Quayden Aydin is a 1st Line FWD BOS -- Jus Poost is a 1st Line FWD CGY -- Gord Murphy is a Top 2 DEF CAR -- Gord Gordon is a 2nd Line FWD COL -- Soup Athanatos is 1st Line FWD COL -- Aunt Jemima is a 1st Line FWD EDM -- Anders Potetson is a Depth FWD FLA -- Bernie Sanders is a 2nd Line FWD LA -- Coach Hockles is a 1st Line FWD LA -- Floaty McPylon is a Top 2 DEF MIN -- Kaido Hoovelson is a Top 4 DEF MIN -- Aejix Dundee is an Elite Goalie MTL -- Stanley Matthews III is a 2nd Line FWD MTL -- Cruz McBroozer is a 2nd Line FWD NSH -- Potatoes O'Bourke is a Top 4 DEF NYI -- Touchdown Thomas is a 1st Line FWD NYR -- Ewic Windros is a 2nd Line FWD PHI -- Bubba Biscuits is a 3rd CHK Line FWD PHI -- Hugh Jass is a Top 4 DEF PIT -- Stabby McStabson is a Depth FWD SJ -- Bavel Bortnik is a Top 2 DEF TB -- Yokozuna is an Elite Goalie WSH -- Aldrig Glomma is a 4th Line FWD WSH -- Jack Bauer is a 2nd Line FWD WSH -- Puck Sonette is a 3rd SCR Line FWD WPG -- Mulkku Paskiainen is an Elite Goalie Unsigned Ogie Ogilthorpe III Jeremiah ThinkTank Guy Fieri Taro Tsujimoto Scott Johns Miracle Johnson Comments I missed Ogilthorpe in the last update, but his contract expired and was not re-signed
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Aug 6, 2017 04:20
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Hockles posted:PHI -- re-signed Hugh Jass to a $21.3mil3yr contract More like huge moron
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Aug 6, 2017 04:44
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Welcome back, Glomma! 2 more years of angry tiny man.
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Aug 6, 2017 17:48
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Hockles posted:2031 Offseason News Hockles posted:EDM -- Anders Potetson is a Depth FWD Sweet, Califorina here I come https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yPgAb9EYlrc
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Aug 6, 2017 18:00
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the worlds richest stanley cup loser, touchdown tom
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Aug 6, 2017 22:59
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Yokozuna continually getting those four year deals is so strange to me
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Aug 6, 2017 23:11
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2032 All-Star Break Update All-Stars Pacific - Coach Hockles (6th selection) Pacific - Bavel Bortnik (9th selection) Pacific - Floaty McPylon (9th selection) Central - Aunt Jemima (10th selection) Central - Aejix Dundee (9th selection) Atlantic - Bernie Sanders (1st selection) Atlantic - Quayden Aydin (10th selection) Atlantic - Jus Poost (11th selection) Atlantic - Yokozuna (5th selection) Metropolitan - Touchdown Thomas (11th selection) Transaction News 1/28/32 MTL gets: 2032 1st Round Pick, a prospect SJ gets: Cruz McBroozer Notable Stats Aydin leads the NHL in Points, Thomas & Bortnik are 5th Thomas & Bortnik lead the NHL in Goals, Poost is 3rd Bortnik is 2nd in +/-, Thomas is 4th Top 6 in PIM: O'Bourke, Windros, Jemima, Biscuits, McBroozer, Murphy Comments McStabson finally is back to playing in the NHL Boston is starting to fall off a bit McBroozer gets traded just before the ASG http://tinyurl.com/NHL-Create-A-Goon-2017 for complete stats
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Aug 6, 2017 23:35
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bavel bortnik doing everything he possibly can to will san jose to victory and the cheater rear end kings with their 2 goon stars are still besting the sharks
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Aug 6, 2017 23:46
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so Windros doubled his shooting % or something because he's his normal season goal total at half way 
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Aug 7, 2017 02:07
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the gently caress you doing bubbers this spuds guy is eating our lunch in PIM
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Aug 7, 2017 02:22
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Tampa doing it for old man yoko
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Aug 7, 2017 03:33
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A trade!
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Aug 7, 2017 03:57
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Back in the ASG and back in the basement standings-wise 
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Aug 7, 2017 05:23
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aunt jemima posted:Back in the ASG and back in the basement standings-wise I think I gave up on life
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Aug 8, 2017 04:55
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I just want tommy to win one more Stanley before he retires, is that too much to ask for?
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Aug 8, 2017 23:39
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Potatoes is traded from one dumpster fire to another and appears to be rather upset about it looking at his PIMs and hits...or I can just take the Aunt Jemima view and 
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Aug 9, 2017 23:45
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End of 2031-32 Regular Season Update Transaction News 3/1/32 LA gets: Aldrig Glomma WSH gets: 2033 3rd Round Pick, 2 prospects 3/2/32 WSH gets: 2032 3rd Round Pick, a prospect COL gets: Puck Sonette COL assigned Puck Sonette to San Antonio of the AHL Notable Stats Aydin lead the NHL in Points, Thomas was 2nd, Poost was 5th Thomas lead the NHL in Goals, Bortnik was 2nd, Aydin was 3rd, Poost was 4th Aydin finished 3rd in +/-, Poost was 4th, Thomas was 5th Top 4 in PIM - O'Bourke, Windros, Biscuits, Jemima Comments Boston didn't make the playoffs for the first time in like 10 years Washington tried to purge their team of goons, guess American Hero Jack Bauer made the cut I think Sonette had to stay in the AHL for salary cap reasons Potatoes hit 300 PIM for the first time in this sim! Aydin should be back to winning all the trophies Yokozuna might get his first taste of winning awards http://tinyurl.com/NHL-Create-A-Goon-2017 for complete stats
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Aug 10, 2017 00:25
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Floaty McPylon unfortunately died after being the best player in the league last season.  Also the Kings are acquiring all the goons now.
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Aug 10, 2017 00:33
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DO IT FOR YOKO YOU SANDBAGS
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Aug 10, 2017 01:45
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Potato's TOI climbs almost as fast as his PIMs. He basically line changes by punching someone in the head and going to the box
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Aug 10, 2017 02:05
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Eat poo poo, Toronto!
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Aug 10, 2017 02:21
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Hockles posted:Aydin should be back to winning all the trophies except for the mothafuckin Norris, b*tches. Bavel is king again! LA may have the far superior team but nobody gets swept with class quite like the Sharks
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Aug 10, 2017 02:27
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Taters get 300 PIM while you don't even get 200 Bubba? You disgust me.
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Aug 10, 2017 02:28
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THE MACHO MAN posted:Potato's TOI climbs almost as fast as his PIMs. He basically line changes by punching someone in the head and going to the box That's how you play defense. 
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Aug 10, 2017 03:38
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Oh no! Not Agent Jack Bauer's goon buddies! Jack Bauer will have his vengeance on the Canadian NHL terrorists! 
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Aug 10, 2017 04:06
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Hockles posted:3/2/32 oh... oh noooooo....
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Aug 11, 2017 00:41
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| # ? May 9, 2024 23:56 |
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Nippon has turned out to be more of an Andrew Shaw than a Corey Perry.  Also the Ducks suck. Someone in Boston put in a good word for me.
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Aug 12, 2017 00:43
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