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Trash Boat posted:This is utterly unbelievable. What kind of an office building has 100 workers coming in on a Sunday? I know it's minor, but when he walked in the door, they saw him and immediately turned off all the lights. I'm curious on the office layout that lets him see into the closets and bathrooms from the office door. Edit: Or even see 100 people from the door. I've been in several cubicle-farm type offices, and I don't think I've seen a main open area where you could fit more than 20 people in one person's field of view. I think he needs to rewrite his story to take place in a manufacturing plant and he walked in on the mezzanine or catwalk looking down on to the factory floor. Or a football stadium. jjack229 has a new favorite as of 16:41 on Oct 30, 2017 |
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Oct 30, 2017 16:31
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I need to  ...
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Oct 30, 2017 16:47
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I'm the head of a large venture capitalist organization standing quietly in the dark for ten minutes while 100 people all around me put on their clothes and wipe down their work surfaces with pledge.
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Oct 30, 2017 16:58
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I'm 100 people quietly and simultaneously disengaging from loving, dressing and getting back to work in complete pitch black darkness
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Oct 30, 2017 17:15
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On a Sunday..
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Oct 30, 2017 18:00
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I'm going with, if this happened at all, he walked in on a Sunday, saw two people were in the office and having sex. They closed the door to their office, put clothes back on, and then never talked about it . He then concluded that if he saw that 2 of his 100 employees were in on Sunday and having sex, then it stands to reason that 100 of his 100 employees must have been in on a Sunday and all having sex at the same time, and never talked about it. Also, how would you feel knowing that you weren't invited to an all-company, 100 person orgy? Everyone in the office is totally down with having sex with, or at least next to, everyone else in the office, as long as that one guy isn't there to kill the mood.
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Oct 30, 2017 18:20
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I mean, I worked in some big offices and while there were some hot women there, I wouldn't really want to see most of the people I was around all day naked let alone touch them. But who knows what happens when the pure sexual tension of a 100 bored, tired people who just want to get home and watch Netflix unloads!
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Oct 30, 2017 18:42
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If you didn’t start calling bullshit when they said “I head a large venture capitalist firm” then followed it up with “I’m always busy making sure everyone is doing analysis” then lol
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Oct 30, 2017 19:02
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Yeah the game with that one isn't "did it happen or not" it's how early can you tell it didn't
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Oct 30, 2017 19:51
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Joey Freshwater posted:If you didn’t start calling bullshit when they said “I head a large venture capitalist firm” then followed it up with “I’m always busy making sure everyone is doing analysis” then lol 
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Oct 30, 2017 19:52
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Just dropping by your cube to make sure you're analyzing stuff. Don't forget to analyze data today!
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Oct 30, 2017 20:20
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Cut the guy some slack, he really likes that show Billions but he can't remember enough of the terms to lie more convincingly.
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Oct 30, 2017 21:32
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Trash Boat posted:This is utterly unbelievable. What kind of an office building has 100 workers coming in on a Sunday? Er, uh, sorry, that was a typo. Suppsoed to say "orifice building" jjack229 posted:I know it's minor, but when he walked in the door, they saw him and immediately turned off all the lights. I'm curious on the office layout that lets him see into the closets and bathrooms from the office door. I like the part where one guy walks over to the light switch and then waits an arbitrary amount of time or somehow has a signal with everyone to know when to put the lights back on Though thanks this story for making me remember the Doug episode, when someone steale's Bebe's radio and they turn off the lights to allow the person to return it without getting in trouble. BUT THEN THEY TORN THE LIGHTS ON TOO EARLY and I forget who the revealed radio stealer is
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Oct 31, 2017 02:04
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Oct 31, 2017 02:33
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sweeperbravo posted:Though thanks this story for making me remember the Doug episode, when someone steale's Bebe's radio and they turn off the lights to allow the person to return it without getting in trouble. BUT THEN THEY TORN THE LIGHTS ON TOO EARLY and I forget who the revealed radio stealer is
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Oct 31, 2017 02:39
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That photo screams, I have never seen a briefcase outside of an '80s movie.
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Oct 31, 2017 03:10
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Applesnots posted:That photo screams, I have never seen a briefcase outside of an '80s movie. Just wearing my striped green tank top and briefcase on my way to my big boy job!
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Oct 31, 2017 03:21
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What do you carry your Yu-gi-oh cards in?? A safeway bag?!
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Oct 31, 2017 06:08
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Oct 31, 2017 09:20
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It's funny seeing people whose STDH have random passersby dishing out the burns instead of themselves, like they want to make it clear that they weren't being dicks themselves, it was this random 12yo.
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Oct 31, 2017 09:37
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And she unmistakably determines the age of both strangers, lol. Also lol that in this imagined scenario, the pregnant girl can be a rape victim.
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Oct 31, 2017 14:20
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Then the bastard child spontaneously emerged from her womb and applauded
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Oct 31, 2017 14:28
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Why were the analysts typing?
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Oct 31, 2017 14:30
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Jerry Cotton posted:Why were the analysts typing? Lookit this dumb schmuck who's never done analysis 
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Oct 31, 2017 14:44
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Comptroll The Forums posted:Lookit this dumb schmuck who's never done analysis You're right, even though that's what I'm supposed to be doing right now. (Not financial analysis. My penis and other sexy parts couldn't take it.)
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Oct 31, 2017 14:46
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Nov 2, 2017 13:06
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I wish there were more comments with people congratulating him. They're my favourite part of stdh.
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Nov 2, 2017 13:32
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I love that it all supposedly happened in the course of a week.
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Nov 2, 2017 15:32
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Joey Freshwater posted:If you didn’t start calling bullshit when they said “I head a large venture capitalist firm” then followed it up with “I’m always busy making sure everyone is doing analysis” then lol I want to know more about the building in Atlanta "unexpectedly collapsing." I think that would have made the news.
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Nov 2, 2017 23:43
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Jurgan posted:I want to know more about the building in Atlanta "unexpectedly collapsing." I think that would have made the news. It's "I need to go iron my dog" levels of unbelievable excuses. "Why are you home so early?" "....office collapsed. Whole building, just whumpf into the ground. Damndest thing, they're all dead!"
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Nov 3, 2017 00:12
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This is, this is just sad, even if it's true.
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Nov 3, 2017 03:30
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Shangri-Law School posted:This is, this is just sad, even if it's true. Depression can really gently caress with your personal hygiene. I imagine there's other priorities in that person's life. I do hope it's fake, because I hope that no kids died, but still
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Nov 3, 2017 09:21
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Yeah, self neglect is incredibly common - personal hygiene, weight, etc. It's not just being a sad sack of tears for the rest of your life. Why they felt the need to make a macro about their kids death is another thing though.
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Nov 3, 2017 11:15
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While I know plenty of sadbrains who go without showering for a week (I am functional and only ever go three days without showering), I prefer to believe it's stdh because no one would ever decide the best way to share their grief over their child's death would be by posting an outdated image macro on Imgur... Right?
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Nov 3, 2017 11:28
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no, you know what? celebrate coping, you fucks.
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Nov 3, 2017 11:33
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JOHNSON COCKSLAP posted:no, you know what? celebrate coping, you fucks. As a recovering sadbrains, this. Some days, just being able to get out of bed was a victory. I wouldn't wish clinical depression on anyone, because it's the most soul-destroying thing, but I am so sick of people who act like they know what it's like to be honest to God clinically loving depressed because they've been sad before. It's not sad. It's like being dead inside. If you are able to do more than you could last week, even if it's just basic self-care, that is worth feeling good about.
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Nov 3, 2017 12:50
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Really doesn't belong in this thread because it's entirely plausible. Why it's an image macro is another thing altogether. Not sure who the audience would be for it, unless it's from some sort of bereavement therapy forum, in which case more power to them. Now post something less sad please
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Nov 3, 2017 13:05
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Bertrand Hustle posted:As a recovering sadbrains, this. Some days, just being able to get out of bed was a victory. For me depression is less feeling bad and more being unable to feel good. So you feel lovely because things that would normally make you feel good just...don't.
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Nov 3, 2017 13:08
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 Some of the best Achewood was when it got extremely real about depression.
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Nov 3, 2017 13:57
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Pastry of the Year posted:
 I must be missing something in that.Dog #3 can't cope with depression, hops back into his ragtop 1968 Plymouth Fury, and the cholo dogs become sad too?
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Nov 3, 2017 17:48
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