Schroedinger's Quantum Bullshit: The Give Yourself Goosebumps Megathread

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VivaLa Eeveelution: Apr 3, 2011

Good =! Goal. Besides, we're also on the run from our buyers.

Hmm. Let's stab Brandon. I can't remember why we wanted to, but hey - free stabbing.

# ? Nov 15, 2017 06:30

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# ? May 11, 2024 23:03

AweStriker: Oct 6, 2014

We don't need friends! We have money!

# ? Nov 15, 2017 06:31

pyrerose: May 8, 2017

Lets see if the civil war guy will give us a sweet calvary saber.

# ? Nov 15, 2017 11:20

Rebonack7: Aug 27, 2015

Next vote for stabbing Brandon's grave, facing the ghost-boy alone, or confronting the Civil War soldier gets it.

# ? Nov 15, 2017 18:02

Leraika: Jun 14, 2015; Luckily, I *did* save your old avatar. Fucked around and found out indeed.

Let's make sure the south doesn't rise again

# ? Nov 15, 2017 18:36

rudecyrus: Nov 6, 2009; fuck you trolls

Civil War Soldier

# ? Nov 15, 2017 18:47

Rebonack7: Aug 27, 2015

quote:

You decide the enormous Civil War soldier must be the Keeper of the Sword. You face him and the fencing-ghost behind you vanishes.

You can't seem to lift your eyes from the sharp blade of the soldier's weapon. "Are y-y-you the K-Keeper of the Sword?" you ask him, your voice trembling.

"NO!" he bellows.

Then he lunges forward and charges at you!

"Aaaaahhh!" you scream in terror. You turn and run for your life. Down the stairs. Out the front door. Into the night.

You don't look back. But you don't have to. You can hear the ghostly soldier behind you. His heavy boots thud against the ground.

You dash across the front yard, toward the road. You manage to put some distance between you and the ghost. But then something grabs your foot!

SMACK. Your hands hit the gravel at the side of the road as you fall flat on your face. You glance down to see what made you fall. Just a gnarled tree root.

"Prepare to die!" the soldier shouts as he stomps toward you.

quote:

The Civil War soldier raises his huge sword. You quickly roll out of the way. The sword plunges into the ground. You scramble to your feet and run as the soldier wrestles the blade out of the dirt.

Where can you go? What can you do? Your heart pounds as you race down the road toward town. Maybe you can get some help. Maybe the police will drive by. Maybe someone besides you will see this Civil War soldier and do something to save you!

Maybe not.

You see two choices up ahead. There's a small bridge that crosses a narrow river. If you run to the bridge, maybe you can hide under it.

You also see a small red barn across the street. It's behind the farmhouse across from your grandmother's house.

Another good hiding place.

Which is it? The bridge or the barn?

If you run to the bridge, turn to PAGE 32.

If you hide in the barn, turn to PAGE 55.

Character Sheet posted:

Inventory
Graveyard Map

Goal Endings: 0/2

Bad Endings
Wound up stuck dealing with both a ghost and a Lanx.
Killed in a particularly gory fashion by the MHG.
Dragged into a malfunctioning ghost-hunting device.
Became a ghost rider.
Suffocated by a worm-faced ghost.
Clubbed by a ghost-neanderthal.

Achievements
But I Refuse: Turned down the ghost-boy's offer both times.
Selling Souls: Offloaded the haunted house onto someone else.

# ? Nov 16, 2017 04:47

WrightOfWay: Jul 24, 2010

Maybe there will be a troll under the bridge that will save us.

# ? Nov 16, 2017 05:07

AweStriker: Oct 6, 2014

That must be a bridge too far for ol' Soldier.

# ? Nov 16, 2017 05:30

Leraika: Jun 14, 2015; Luckily, I *did* save your old avatar. Fucked around and found out indeed.

let's have An Occurrence At Ghost Creek Bridge

# ? Nov 16, 2017 07:15

rudecyrus: Nov 6, 2009; fuck you trolls

Bridge

# ? Nov 16, 2017 08:24

Rebonack7: Aug 27, 2015

quote:

The bridge looks good to you. You can slip down the bank to the river and hide under it. You might be able to sneak around and change directions. Maybe you'll lose the soldier after all.

But before you even reach the riverbank, you feel a heavy hand on your shoulder.

"Halt, traitor!" the soldier cries.

"No!" you scream, twisting away. You stumble a bit and lurch forward, out of his grasp. You keep running.

Finally you reach the bridge. But the soldier is right behind you. He swings his sword wildly at you - as if to cut off your head!

"No!" you cry again, jumping backwards.

Uh-oh. Backwards wasn't a good idea. You've just leaped off the bridge!

And it's a long way down. Oooh. That hurt.

You have a fifty-fifty chance of surviving that fall.

Remember what page you're on - PAGE 32. Then toss this book up in the air.

If it lands with the front cover facing up, turn to PAGE 105.

If it lands with the cover face down, turn to PAGE 69.

Character Sheet posted:

Inventory
Graveyard Map

Goal Endings: 0/2

Bad Endings
Wound up stuck dealing with both a ghost and a Lanx.
Killed in a particularly gory fashion by the MHG.
Dragged into a malfunctioning ghost-hunting device.
Became a ghost rider.
Suffocated by a worm-faced ghost.
Clubbed by a ghost-neanderthal.

Achievements
But I Refuse: Turned down the ghost-boy's offer both times.
Selling Souls: Offloaded the haunted house onto someone else.

# ? Nov 17, 2017 02:05

Octatonic: Sep 7, 2010

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XsC8zEgZEfo

# ? Nov 17, 2017 03:03

Kite Pride Worldwide: Apr 20, 2009

Nice.

# ? Nov 17, 2017 03:08

VivaLa Eeveelution: Apr 3, 2011

I threw my phone - from like two inches above a mattress that's already on the ground; all is good - and it landed screen down, BL fanart up. 69 it is.

# ? Nov 17, 2017 04:34

Rebonack7: Aug 27, 2015

quote:

The book lands with the front cover down. Lucky you! You survive the fall off the bridge. But don't kid yourself. You're pretty bruised and scratched up.

"Owww..." you moan, as you lie on the rocky banks of the river.

Mistake. You shouldn't have moaned. Now the soldier knows where you are!

In a flash, he jumps off the bridge and towers over you.

"Prepare to die!" he shouts.

Can't this guy think of anything else to say?

Then he... well... he... you know. He finishes you off with one thrust of that beautiful, mother-of-pearl-handled, sapphire-encrusted sword.

Hey - don't look so surprised.

We said there was a fifty-fifty chance of surviving the fall. We didn't say anything about surviving the book!

THE END

Character Sheet posted:

Inventory
Graveyard Map

Goal Endings: 0/2

Bad Endings
Wound up stuck dealing with both a ghost and a Lanx.
Killed in a particularly gory fashion by the MHG.
Dragged into a malfunctioning ghost-hunting device.
Became a ghost rider.
Suffocated by a worm-faced ghost.
Clubbed by a ghost-neanderthal.
Stabbed by the ghost of a Civil War soldier.

Achievements
But I Refuse: Turned down the ghost-boy's offer both times.
Selling Souls: Offloaded the haunted house onto someone else.

Our options posted:

Face the ghost alone.

Say we aren't afraid of the dark.

Accept the ghost's offer.

Accept the ghost's second offer.

Run toward the graveyard.

Say we haven't met the Luckmeyer twins yet.

Say John Luckmeyer is the Keeper of the Sword.

Grab the sword.

Guess which ghost is the MPG.

Stab Brandon Estep's grave.

Hide in the barn.

Die from falling off the bridge.

# ? Nov 17, 2017 13:09

pyrerose: May 8, 2017

Lets hide in the barn. I still want his sword.

# ? Nov 17, 2017 14:39

Friend Commuter: Nov 3, 2009; SO CLEVER I WANT TO FUCK MY OWN BRAIN.; Smellrose

I tossed my phone (it's a dumbphone, it'd take more than that to break it) and it landed front-up. I guess I'm gonna go jump off a bridge.

# ? Nov 17, 2017 15:55

rudecyrus: Nov 6, 2009; fuck you trolls

Cover face down

# ? Nov 17, 2017 18:06

AweStriker: Oct 6, 2014

Well that turned out to not be nice.

guess we'll die

# ? Nov 17, 2017 18:08

Octatonic: Sep 7, 2010

stab the grave already

# ? Nov 17, 2017 20:02

Rebonack7: Aug 27, 2015

quote:

The book landed with the front cover face up. That means you don't survive the fall from the bridge.

Sorry.

So now you are a ghost, roaming the neighborhood, haunting everyone in sight. And for a while, scaring people is fun.

But soon you get tired of people screaming whenever you appear. And some people can't even see you. For some reason, not everyone is able to see ghosts.

You begin to understand why the Luckmeyer twins played pranks and practical jokes. It's a goof!

So you start doing it, too - playing tricks on people. You move their coffee cups while they're not looking. You raise their windows right after they've closed them. You wrinkle their clothes while they're ironing them. You steal key pieces from jigsaw puzzles when people aren't looking.

Then one day, you go too far - you do something really evil. You go through a GIVE YOURSELF GOOSEBUMPS book with a black felt marker and cross off all the page numbers!

The only problem is, it was this book. The only one you're in.

Which is why, sad to say, this is really and truly...

THE END

Character Sheet posted:

Inventory
Graveyard Map

Goal Endings: 0/2

Bad Endings
Wound up stuck dealing with both a ghost and a Lanx.
Killed in a particularly gory fashion by the MHG.
Dragged into a malfunctioning ghost-hunting device.
Became a ghost rider.
Suffocated by a worm-faced ghost.
Clubbed by a ghost-neanderthal.
Stabbed by the ghost of a Civil War soldier.
Died, came back as a ghost, and accidentally destroyed our own universe.

Achievements
But I Refuse: Turned down the ghost-boy's offer both times.
Selling Souls: Offloaded the haunted house onto someone else.

Our options posted:

Face the ghost alone.

Say we aren't afraid of the dark.

Accept the ghost's offer.

Accept the ghost's second offer.

Run toward the graveyard.

Say we haven't met the Luckmeyer twins yet.

Say John Luckmeyer is the Keeper of the Sword.

Grab the sword.

Guess which ghost is the MPG.

Stab Brandon Estep's grave.

Hide in the barn.

# ? Nov 19, 2017 04:52

rudecyrus: Nov 6, 2009; fuck you trolls

What's in the barn?

# ? Nov 19, 2017 04:56

Octatonic: Sep 7, 2010

stab the grave already!!

# ? Nov 19, 2017 05:09

AweStriker: Oct 6, 2014

barn time

# ? Nov 19, 2017 05:30

pyrerose: May 8, 2017

May as well check out that sweet looking barn.

# ? Nov 19, 2017 06:19

Rebonack7: Aug 27, 2015

quote:

You race across the lawn and over the hill to the small barn. You swing open the door.

Instantly, more than forty chickens flap down out of the rafters at you! Feathers fly everywhere.

"Aaaaa-choooo!" The feathers tickle your nose. They get in your mouth. You swipe at the downy tufts.

The clucking is so loud you cover your ears. Then you cover your head. "Aaaaaahhhh!" you scream. The chickens are swooping toward your hair.

Huh?

Why are they swooping toward your hair? You've heard that bats will fly at people and get tangled in their hair. But chickens?

There's definitely something weird going on with these birds.

quote:

"Get away from me!" you shout. You duck and twist, trying to avoid the diving chickens. They squawk and flap their wings. One bird lands on your shoulder. Its claws dig into your clothes.

"Hey!" you yell at it. You try shaking it off, but it clings to you. You notice the other chickens hovering nearby.

You reach up to grab the stupid bird but something stops you. Could it be? Is the chicken smiling at you?

You peer closely at the bird.

Uh-oh.

That chicken isn't smiling, it's baring its teeth.

But chickens don't have teeth. And they sure don't have fangs.

That's right. Fangs. Guess what? These aren't ordinary chickens. These are vampire chickens. And the bird on your shoulder is leaning closer. And closer. And closer.

CHOMP!

Being bitten by a vampire chicken puts you in a fowl mood. Oh, well. Better cluck next time.

THE END

Character Sheet posted:

Inventory
Graveyard Map

Goal Endings: 0/2

Bad Endings
Wound up stuck dealing with both a ghost and a Lanx.
Killed in a particularly gory fashion by the MHG.
Dragged into a malfunctioning ghost-hunting device.
Became a ghost rider.
Suffocated by a worm-faced ghost.
Clubbed by a ghost-neanderthal.
Stabbed by the ghost of a Civil War soldier.
Died, came back as a ghost, and accidentally destroyed our own universe.
Devoured by vampire chickens.

Achievements
But I Refuse: Turned down the ghost-boy's offer both times.
Selling Souls: Offloaded the haunted house onto someone else.

Our options posted:

Face the ghost alone.

Say we aren't afraid of the dark.

Accept the ghost's offer.

Accept the ghost's second offer.

Run toward the graveyard.

Say we haven't met the Luckmeyer twins yet.

Say John Luckmeyer is the Keeper of the Sword.

Grab the sword.

Guess which ghost is the MPG.

Stab Brandon Estep's grave.

# ? Nov 19, 2017 16:51

AweStriker: Oct 6, 2014

After vampire chickens, falling off a bridge, and getting stabbed, we are definitely not afraid of the dark.

# ? Nov 19, 2017 18:28

rudecyrus: Nov 6, 2009; fuck you trolls

Let's drag this out and guess which ghost is the MPG

# ? Nov 19, 2017 19:17

Leraika: Jun 14, 2015; Luckily, I *did* save your old avatar. Fucked around and found out indeed.

But really, who are the Luckmeyer twins?

# ? Nov 19, 2017 22:09

Rebonack7: Aug 27, 2015

Next vote for one of those three gets it.

# ? Nov 20, 2017 03:27

POOL IS CLOSED: Jul 14, 2011; I'm just exploding with mackerel. This is the aji wo kutta of my discontent.; Pillbug

I ain't scared of the dark.

# ? Nov 20, 2017 03:34

Rebonack7: Aug 27, 2015

quote:

It's pitch-black in the house. But you're okay. You're not totally freaked out by the dark. Not yet, anyway.

"I mean it!" Lark yells. "You two are going to get it if you don't turn those lights back on. And I mean now!"

You and Robin stand frozen in the kitchen. But before you can even move toward the circuit breaker box, the lights pop back on.

"Whoa! Oh, man!" you hear Lark and his friends yelling.

You hurry to the family room. That's where Lark and his buddies were watching a movie on TV. You peek in the door.

What a sight! Popcorn all over the floor. Drinks spilled on the rug. Couch cushions tossed all over the room.

Lark spots you in the doorway. He glares at you and Robin - then lunges toward you. His hands reach straight for your throat.

This takes us to the ghost-boy's first offer.

Character Sheet posted:

Inventory
Empty

Goal Endings: 0/2

Bad Endings
Wound up stuck dealing with both a ghost and a Lanx.
Killed in a particularly gory fashion by the MHG.
Dragged into a malfunctioning ghost-hunting device.
Became a ghost rider.
Suffocated by a worm-faced ghost.
Clubbed by a ghost-neanderthal.
Stabbed by the ghost of a Civil War soldier.
Died, came back as a ghost, and accidentally destroyed our own universe.
Devoured by vampire chickens.

Achievements
But I Refuse: Turned down the ghost-boy's offer both times.
Selling Souls: Offloaded the haunted house onto someone else.

Our options posted:

Face the ghost alone.

Accept the ghost's offer.

Accept the ghost's second offer.

Run toward the graveyard.

Say we haven't met the Luckmeyer twins yet.

Say John Luckmeyer is the Keeper of the Sword.

Grab the sword.

Guess which ghost is the MPG.

Stab Brandon Estep's grave.

# ? Nov 20, 2017 04:25

poisonpill: Nov 8, 2009; The only way to get huge fast is to insult a passing witch and hope she curses you with Beast-strength.

Then take the ghost's offer!

# ? Nov 20, 2017 04:40

Rebonack7: Aug 27, 2015

quote:

"Okay," you say to the ghost. "I'll do anything. Just help us!"

"Good," the ghost-boy answers.

An instant later, you hear Lark go flying to the floor.

"Yeow!" Lark yells as he hits the rug hard.

You and Robin stop running. You turn and laugh.

"Quit snickering, you little twerps," Lark snarls as he clambers to his feet. "You're dead meat."

He comes toward you and Robin, one hand clenched in a fist. The ghost-boy winks, and the rug flies out from under Lark. He sprawls on the floor again.

You and Robin laugh so hard you double over.

For the rest of the night, every time Lark or one of his buddies tries to come after you, the ghost pulls a prank. Nothing big. Nothing that would make Lark suspect anything. Just enough to keep the guys from bothering you.

You and Robin sleep very peacefully that night.

The next morning, when you get home, the ghost is in your room, waiting for you. "Okay," the ghost says. "Time to keep your promise. Let's go."

Go? Go where?

quote:

"Where are you going?" you ask the ghost-boy. "And what's your name?"

"You'll see," he answers.

"I'll see? I'll see what your name is?" you ask.

"Sure. It's on my gravestone," the ghost replies.

A cold mist swirls around the ghost-boy, making you shiver. You notice the ghost's eyes have turned hard. He's not so friendly, now.

You really regret making that promise.

"Let's go," he orders, leading the way.

You have no choice. You've seen this ghost in action. If you don't do what he says, he'll probably haunt and torment you for the rest of your life.

You follow him to an old graveyard. This one's on the far side of town. At the edge of the graveyard, the ghost stops. He puts out his hand to keep you from taking another step.

"Wait here, until I reach my tombstone," he tells you. "When you see me disappear, stand on top of my grave."

Hmmm. Sounds creepy. Are you going to do it?

If yes, turn to PAGE 90.

If no, turn to PAGE 110.

Character Sheet posted:

Inventory
Empty

Goal Endings: 0/2

Bad Endings
Wound up stuck dealing with both a ghost and a Lanx.
Killed in a particularly gory fashion by the MHG.
Dragged into a malfunctioning ghost-hunting device.
Became a ghost rider.
Suffocated by a worm-faced ghost.
Clubbed by a ghost-neanderthal.
Stabbed by the ghost of a Civil War soldier.
Died, came back as a ghost, and accidentally destroyed our own universe.
Devoured by vampire chickens.

Achievements
But I Refuse: Turned down the ghost-boy's offer both times.
Selling Souls: Offloaded the haunted house onto someone else.