Taiwan Number 1

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Taiwan Number 1

Mistle: Oct 11, 2005; Eckot's comic relief cousin from out of town; Grimey Drawer

oohhboy posted:

Given how desperate you have to be to defect the turbo loving might have already taken place. Add the fact he went through the DMZ of all places. I can only imagine.

If he didn't have any because they died of decades-gone parasites, there's really no downside to defecting. :shrug:

# ? Nov 16, 2017 22:38

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# ? May 30, 2024 13:51

Gargamel Gibson: Apr 24, 2014

Power Khan posted:

No. Do I need to fill this blank spot?

Of course.

# ? Nov 16, 2017 23:32

MetaJew: Apr 14, 2006; Gather round, one and all, and thrill to my turgid tales of underwhelming misadventure!

oohhboy posted:

Japan #1. Train company apologises after train leave 20 seconds early.

http://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-42009839

Yeah they even have a full size train driving simulator game now. I saw one being demo'd in the Akhiba train station two weeks ago. Train operators in Singapore, by comparison to Japan were trash.

# ? Nov 16, 2017 23:34

Darkman Fanpage: Jul 4, 2012

Ups_rail posted:

In korea chat

http://dailycaller.com/2017/11/16/doctors-found-parasites-theyd-never-seen-before-inside-the-north-korean-soldier-that-bolted-at-the-dmz/
odd choice of words

this is some straight fake news

# ? Nov 16, 2017 23:35

oohhboy: Jun 8, 2013; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Out of curiosity I played a train simulator in an arcade a while back wondering why anyone would play this as it was "Paying to work". To reach that level of accuracy in a job everyday manually across the country is both praiseworthy, impressive and madness.

# ? Nov 16, 2017 23:47

ladron: Sep 15, 2007; eso es lo que es

Darkman Fanpage posted:

this is some straight fake news

for real.
it is well known that kimchi cures parasites. it is famous all over the world.

# ? Nov 17, 2017 00:26

I would blow Dane Cook: Dec 26, 2008

# ? Nov 17, 2017 00:31

Devils Affricate: Jan 22, 2010

Was he 70kg before or after the parasites were removed

# ? Nov 17, 2017 00:37

Mistle: Oct 11, 2005; Eckot's comic relief cousin from out of town; Grimey Drawer

I would blow Dane Cook posted:

I would unironically buy that shirt for half my christmas list.

# ? Nov 17, 2017 00:48

Warbadger: Jun 17, 2006

Darkman Fanpage posted:

this is some straight fake news

Parasites are incredibly common in undeveloped countries. A lot of South Koreans still take antiparasitic drugs every year as thier parents taught them, despite the things being basically eradicated from the country decades ago.

Warbadger fucked around with this message at 02:42 on Nov 17, 2017

# ? Nov 17, 2017 01:34

angel opportunity: Sep 7, 2004; Total Eclipse of the Heart

https://twitter.com/c60637458/status/317498748026626048

# ? Nov 17, 2017 03:40

I would blow Dane Cook: Dec 26, 2008

I moved to S.Korea about 3 weeks ago (for a teaching gig) and ever since have been extremely anxious and shy around people, especially in crowded places. I come from a mid-size US town with a population of about 300k and never had this problem before. Well, not to this extend anyway.

I don't feel comfortable at all around Korean people, could it be because I haven't gotten to know them well? I can't stop seeing them as very glamorous, stylish, wealthy (I'm broke right now, one of the reasons I'm here, I took what was available), modern and it makes me anxious to even be around them. It's like the expectation I have of myself kicks up every time I go out in public. Blows your mind? I also stick out like a sore thumb which does not help. It's like the entire crowded street is looking at me in confusion/distrust/disapproval/anger<- I'm sure this is how people with anxiety disorder often feel.

But the bottom line is, I know it's all in my head and can't get over it by myself. I literally see people obviously way worse off than me and still feel ... small, it's the impact this place has had on me.

I would go to a therapist but I'm afraid it would sabotage my teaching job in some way- I've read a lot of negative things about perception on mental issues in Korea.
I'm a 29y/o male, and I'd say based on the interaction I had throughout my life probably (slightly) above average looking. I was thinking that the weird perception I created in my head could come from lack of exposure to the culture. I was always a little shy but never full blown sweating in public and having panic attacks. The teaching job is ok, I usually turn into an emotionless robot when I'm working, no matter what job it is.

I'd consider going home but I hate giving up like this. I think I need to hear some logic and reason instead of voices in my head, so here I am asking strangers on Reddit. Any advice is welcomed and appreciated

# ? Nov 17, 2017 03:53

Heer98: Apr 10, 2009

Lol, that guy is going to marry the first girl he hooks up with

# ? Nov 17, 2017 03:56

Cry Havoc: May 10, 2004; This cyberpunk cartoon avatar is pretty dang ol' good, I tell you what.

do you mean the anxious guy or sunny boy

# ? Nov 17, 2017 04:56

Kharnifex: Sep 11, 2001; The Banter is better in AusGBS

ladron posted:

nbd, I've seen this same trick with japanese girls' assholes

Hahaha, that brings back horrible memories

# ? Nov 17, 2017 04:58

ladron: Sep 15, 2007; eso es lo que es

TsarZiedonis posted:

Lol, that guy is going to marry the first girl he hooks up with

heh. for real

Kharnifex posted:

Hahaha, that brings back horrible memories

glad to help :tipshat:

# ? Nov 17, 2017 05:39

big time bisexual: Oct 16, 2002; Cool Party

angel opportunity posted:

https://twitter.com/c60637458/status/317498748026626048

https://twitter.com/c60637458/status/330159595911778305

:smith:

# ? Nov 17, 2017 05:57

eggyolk: Nov 8, 2007

Mistle posted:

If he didn't have any because they died of decades-gone parasites, there's really no downside to defecting.

Maybe it's something like this:

https://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=170323001

Terrible link, but couldnt find a better source.

# ? Nov 17, 2017 06:08

bob dobbs is dead: Oct 8, 2017; I love peeps; Nap Ghost

eggyolk posted:

Maybe it's something like this:

https://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthread.php?t=170323001

Terrible link, but couldnt find a better source.

says her siblings were fine despite whole village eating
lol

# ? Nov 17, 2017 06:35

LimburgLimbo: Feb 10, 2008

Goddamn that dude is 29 and from a moderately large city and he can�t deal lol

LimburgLimbo fucked around with this message at 06:43 on Nov 17, 2017

# ? Nov 17, 2017 06:37

Bajaj: Sep 13, 2017; by FactsAreUseless

I would blow Dane Cook posted:

I moved to S.Korea about 3 weeks ago (for a teaching gig) and ever since have been extremely anxious and shy around people, especially in crowded places. I come from a mid-size US town with a population of about 300k and never had this problem before. Well, not to this extend anyway.

I don't feel comfortable at all around Korean people, could it be because I haven't gotten to know them well? I can't stop seeing them as very glamorous, stylish, wealthy (I'm broke right now, one of the reasons I'm here, I took what was available), modern and it makes me anxious to even be around them. It's like the expectation I have of myself kicks up every time I go out in public. Blows your mind? I also stick out like a sore thumb which does not help. It's like the entire crowded street is looking at me in confusion/distrust/disapproval/anger<- I'm sure this is how people with anxiety disorder often feel.

But the bottom line is, I know it's all in my head and can't get over it by myself. I literally see people obviously way worse off than me and still feel ... small, it's the impact this place has had on me.

I would go to a therapist but I'm afraid it would sabotage my teaching job in some way- I've read a lot of negative things about perception on mental issues in Korea.
I'm a 29y/o male, and I'd say based on the interaction I had throughout my life probably (slightly) above average looking. I was thinking that the weird perception I created in my head could come from lack of exposure to the culture. I was always a little shy but never full blown sweating in public and having panic attacks. The teaching job is ok, I usually turn into an emotionless robot when I'm working, no matter what job it is.

I'd consider going home but I hate giving up like this. I think I need to hear some logic and reason instead of voices in my head, so here I am asking strangers on Reddit. Any advice is welcomed and appreciated

Being stared at all the time for the first time in your life must be really weird and scary. I can't imagine how it must feel if you're definitely not a standard of "normal," in dress, cleanliness, or looks. I mean, I saw a lot of really greasy and disgusting foreign STEM-lords in Shenzhen, cargo shorts and all, and I wonder if they cared how disgusting they looked (probably not). I saw some really obese white dudes one night while I was walking and I almost stopped to take a photo because I had not seen such a thing since being in the US. It was so normalized there, but seeing it in China brought it out to circus-levels of amusement and awe. I could totally imagine local people paying 10 RMB to go see these guys sit in a glass room and eat.

I bought a few pairs of those super tight stretchy exercise pants with the tapered legs. I wore those daily for quite a while. I looked fine from the front, but one day I was using a mirror to look at the back of my head and noticed how from the back those pants showed my underwear lines and went in my crack, making me look like one of those aunties squatting outside. That shock when I realized I'd been so casual about showing my rear end to everyone the whole time was enough to make me tuck them away in my dresser immediately. I still wear those pants but only to the gym, and only with a very long t-shirt that covers up the back completely.

Bajaj fucked around with this message at 06:42 on Nov 17, 2017

# ? Nov 17, 2017 06:37

McGavin: Sep 18, 2012

The staring could be worse. For example, you could be America's fattest president in Japan in 1900:

quote:

Taft and his wife visited Japan in 1900. "On account of his unusual proportions [Taft was] an object of tremendous interest to the Japanese." For example, at dinner with high-ranking Japanese officials "the mammoth American attempted in vain 'to achieve the squatting position.' ... Finally a Japanese politely rushed out of the room and returned with a padded stool for Taft. For the rest of the evening he 'looked majestically' on the rest of the party. During his visit, Taft discovered that the Japanese enjoyed looking at him as much as he did at them."

In one remote Japanese village, Taft had to take a rickshaw from the railroad station to his hotel, no other transportation being available. When Taft got in, "the unfortunate coolie to whom it belonged began to utter strange sounds. He rolled his eyes and gesticulated frantically until he prevailed upon a second man to help him in propelling his unaccustomed burden. But even then his excitement did not abate. As they approached the first rise in the road some of the villagers along the way, attracted, no doubt, by the coolie's weird cries, came out to stare and, as usual, remained to laugh. The little 'rickshaw man began chattering and grimacing at all of them and kept it up until he had enlisted the services of at least half the population of the village to help him in attaining the crest of the hill."

On a visit to Hong Kong, Taft's sedan chair, borne by coolies, had collapsed under his weight. For Taft's second visit the American Consul General in Hong Kong took care to prevent a recurrence. "He solemnly contracted with one Yu Wo, a chair builder of the city, to fashion a sedan which would be amply strong. The documents in the case were duly forwarded to the State Department at Washington and released for publication in New York":

quote:
I, the undersigned, Yu Wo of 15B Wellington Street agree to make a sedan chair for the American consul general. . . . This chair is to be used to carry the American giant, the Honorable William Howard Taft. Said Taft being one of the most conspicuous ornaments of the American Wai Wu Pai [Imperial Cabinet], it would obviously discredit this nation if the chair should disintegrate. . . . To avert international complications of this sort, I, Yu Wo, assert my skill as a chairmaker.

It shall be reinforced at all weak points. . . . The shafts shall be of double diameter. The body itself shall be of eventful width. ... Red cloth shall adorn the seat of the chair and gleaming brass look defiantly out to a point that unconsciously, fokis, amahs and dealers in rice shall say: "Certainly this nation of the open door that has so long befriended the Middle Kingdom is a great power." ...

The consul general may have the use of the chair October 11 and 12, 1907, after which the chair belongs to me, with the understanding that if ex-President Cleveland, also reputed to be of heroic size, tours the world, the consul general shall direct his steps to my shop. . . . With such precautions do I safeguard the dignity of a friendly power and contribute an honest chairmaker's part in preserving the Peace of the East.

# ? Nov 17, 2017 08:51

Velisarius: Nov 1, 2009

That lonely guy sure has some big nipples.

# ? Nov 17, 2017 09:12

Slim Jim Pickens: Jan 16, 2012

bob dobbs is dead posted:

says her siblings were fine despite whole village eating
lol

You have to eat human poo poo to get that particular life cycle of the parasite, the normal human variation is basically a tapeworm.

In other words yes, the whole village is 20% parasite egg by body mass.

# ? Nov 17, 2017 09:26

Coolguye: Jul 6, 2011; Required by his programming!

so just in case someone isn't familiar, the term 'calcified' means that there are a lot of dead-rear end worms in her body and brain that are so loving old and so loving dead that you can see their remnants in deposits of calcium carbonate.

this woman has so many parasites, and has had them for so long, that there's a loving fossil record of them.

china.

# ? Nov 17, 2017 10:15

Powerful Two-Hander: Mar 10, 2004; Mods please change my name to "Tooter Skeleton" TIA.

kimcicle posted:

Yeah, gently caress my wife for not being able to produce enough milk on her own due to factors outside of her control, right??

i can gently caress your wife if you think it will help but tbh getting hosed by strangers from the internet is what got her into this mess in the first place

# ? Nov 17, 2017 10:47

Gargamel Gibson: Apr 24, 2014

Velisarius posted:

That lonely guy sure has some big nipples.

And a big life.

# ? Nov 17, 2017 11:26

Kharnifex: Sep 11, 2001; The Banter is better in AusGBS

Powerful Two-Hander posted:

i can gently caress your wife if you think it will help but tbh getting hosed by strangers from the internet is what got her into this mess in the first place

# ? Nov 17, 2017 11:40

Fleta Mcgurn: Oct 5, 2003; Porpoise noise continues.

Power Khan posted:

No. Do I need to fill this blank spot?

Are we not doing "Phrasing!" anymore

# ? Nov 17, 2017 16:39

DACK FAYDEN: Feb 25, 2013; Bear Witness

McGavin posted:

The staring could be worse. For example, you could be America's fattest president in Japan in 1900:

yo this part loving owns

"The consul general may have the use of the chair October 11 and 12, 1907, after which the chair belongs to me, with the understanding that if ex-President Cleveland, also reputed to be of heroic size, tours the world, the consul general shall direct his steps to my shop"

"hey America, I hear you got multiple fat important dudes, I'm gonna make this chair really strong so remember me for next time okay?"

# ? Nov 17, 2017 16:41

Outrail: Jan 4, 2009; www.sapphicrobotica.com

DACK FAYDEN posted:

yo this part loving owns

"The consul general may have the use of the chair October 11 and 12, 1907, after which the chair belongs to me, with the understanding that if ex-President Cleveland, also reputed to be of heroic size, tours the world, the consul general shall direct his steps to my shop"

"hey America, I hear you got multiple fat important dudes, I'm gonna make this chair really strong so remember me for next time okay?"

Must have been at least a few foreigners who lived under the impression that American leaders were appointed on the basis of 'biggest guy gets the throne'.

110 year cycle of history.

# ? Nov 17, 2017 16:50

Bajaj: Sep 13, 2017; by FactsAreUseless

https://gfycat.com/GivingCreativeAmericanindianhorse
Holy :laffo:

# ? Nov 17, 2017 17:49

Grand Fromage: Jan 30, 2006; L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?

Bajaj posted:

https://gfycat.com/GivingCreativeAmericanindianhorse
Holy

oh my god lmao this is like the human version of those cars getting stuck in trees

how is this even possible

# ? Nov 17, 2017 18:01

Deceitful Penguin: Feb 16, 2011

Bajaj posted:

https://gfycat.com/GivingCreativeAmericanindianhorse
Holy

i want to see that person playing octodad

# ? Nov 17, 2017 18:04

ladron: Sep 15, 2007; eso es lo que es

Bajaj posted:

https://gfycat.com/GivingCreativeAmericanindianhorse
Holy

I wonder how many steps she saved with that shortcut

# ? Nov 17, 2017 18:08

bring back old gbs: Feb 28, 2007; by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

lmao its like the purestrain version of watching someone eternally fall down an escalator

they just slooooowly get themselves into this mess and ohh dear its never going to stop this is my life now

# ? Nov 17, 2017 18:38

vanity slug: Jul 20, 2010

qwop lives

# ? Nov 17, 2017 18:43

kimcicle: Feb 23, 2003

Powerful Two-Hander posted:

i can gently caress your wife if you think it will help but tbh getting hosed by strangers from the internet is what got her into this mess in the first place

...I deserved this.

Bajaj posted:

https://gfycat.com/GivingCreativeAmericanindianhorse
Holy

My life is now complete having seen this.

# ? Nov 17, 2017 19:47

Power Khan: Aug 20, 2011; by Fritz the Horse

Bajaj posted:

https://gfycat.com/GivingCreativeAmericanindianhorse
Holy

Since we eliminated all other predators and the most harsh dangers that nature would throw at us: this is what remains of human natural selection.

# ? Nov 17, 2017 22:21

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# ? May 30, 2024 13:51

augias: Apr 7, 2009

Bajaj posted:

I bought a few pairs of those super tight stretchy exercise pants with the tapered legs. I wore those daily for quite a while. I looked fine from the front, but one day I was using a mirror to look at the back of my head and noticed how from the back those pants showed my underwear lines and went in my crack, making me look like one of those aunties squatting outside. That shock when I realized I'd been so casual about showing my rear end to everyone the whole time was enough to make me tuck them away in my dresser immediately. I still wear those pants but only to the gym, and only with a very long t-shirt that covers up the back completely.

just use a g string or thong u fool.

# ? Nov 17, 2017 22:49

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