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What the hell happens next?
This poll is closed.
They literally set fire to the ring by accident 2 2.22%
They literally set fire to the ring on purpose 6 6.67%
Film 6 months of content accidentally using WWE prop belts 6 6.67%
Rehire Jeff Jarrett 23 25.56%
Start splicing in archival footage of AJ Styles and pretending it's current 23 25.56%
Accidentally switch the live Pop TV feed to the WWE Network 6 6.67%
Lose the keys to the production truck, film 6 months of content in the parking lot with a Samsung 7 7.78%
Sue a fan who flips the bird on air, lose all company rights to said fan 13 14.44%
Somehow everything gets good and they start making money (Comedy Option) 4 4.44%
Total: 90 votes
[Edit Poll (moderators only)]

 
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grack
Jan 10, 2012

COACH TOTORO SAY REFEREE CAN BANISH WHISTLE TO LAND OF WIND AND GHOSTS!

exploded mummy posted:

TNA Impact superstar

I know those three words but this doesn't make any sense.

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Mel Mudkiper
Jan 19, 2012

At this point, Mudman abruptly ends the conversation. He usually insists on the last word.
Speaking of Voodoo Kin Mafia, they were responsible for my favorite TNA angle of all time, which manages to be even worse than the Christy one.

Billy sacrifices himself in a Feast or Fired match to get Road Dogg one of the briefcases.

Road Dogg finds out the briefcase, surprise, is for a guaranteed Tag Title match

Road Dogg, instead of picking his long-time partner who is responsible for the title shot, picks his 80 year old father "bullet" bob armstrong to be his partner instead

Billy is angry that Road Dogg is wasting an opportunity that Billy earned on a vanity match with his father, which they end up losing because bob armstrong is 80.

Billy is the heel in this angle

Gold Sexy Body
Nov 17, 2017
Probation
Can't post for 4 years!

Mel Mudkiper posted:

Speaking of Voodoo Kin Mafia, they were responsible for my favorite TNA angle of all time, which manages to be even worse than the Christy one.

Billy sacrifices himself in a Feast or Fired match to get Road Dogg one of the briefcases.

Road Dogg finds out the briefcase, surprise, is for a guaranteed Tag Title match

Road Dogg, instead of picking his long-time partner who is responsible for the title shot, picks his 80 year old father "bullet" bob armstrong to be his partner instead

Billy is angry that Road Dogg is wasting an opportunity that Billy earned on a vanity match with his father, which they end up losing because bob armstrong is 80.

Billy is the heel in this angle

This is very funny and good, but the best VKM angle of all time is surely PAUL, MIKE, WE'LL BE WAITING FOR YA AT THA ALAMO

Aesop Poprock
Oct 21, 2008


Grimey Drawer

Mel Mudkiper posted:

Speaking of Voodoo Kin Mafia, they were responsible for my favorite TNA angle of all time, which manages to be even worse than the Christy one.

Billy sacrifices himself in a Feast or Fired match to get Road Dogg one of the briefcases.

Road Dogg finds out the briefcase, surprise, is for a guaranteed Tag Title match

Road Dogg, instead of picking his long-time partner who is responsible for the title shot, picks his 80 year old father "bullet" bob armstrong to be his partner instead

Billy is angry that Road Dogg is wasting an opportunity that Billy earned on a vanity match with his father, which they end up losing because bob armstrong is 80.

Billy is the heel in this angle

Russo has absolutely no idea how humans would think, feel or act in any situation. He's indescribably bizarre

Benne
Sep 2, 2011

STOP DOING HEROIN
Billy's TNA run is like a non-stop Mad Libs of terrible TNA angles

Alaois
Feb 7, 2012

Aesop Poprock posted:

Russo has absolutely no idea how humans would think, feel or act in any situation. He's indescribably bizarre

bro, there ain't no such thing as faces and heels in real life

flashy_mcflash
Feb 7, 2011

Mel Mudkiper posted:

Speaking of Voodoo Kin Mafia, they were responsible for my favorite TNA angle of all time, which manages to be even worse than the Christy one.

Billy sacrifices himself in a Feast or Fired match to get Road Dogg one of the briefcases.

Road Dogg finds out the briefcase, surprise, is for a guaranteed Tag Title match

Road Dogg, instead of picking his long-time partner who is responsible for the title shot, picks his 80 year old father "bullet" bob armstrong to be his partner instead

Billy is angry that Road Dogg is wasting an opportunity that Billy earned on a vanity match with his father, which they end up losing because bob armstrong is 80.

Billy is the heel in this angle

Replace Billy with HHH, Road Dogg with Kurt, and Bullet Bob with Jason Jordan, and you've basically got this year's build for Survivor Series.

Chris James 2
Aug 9, 2012


Mel Mudkiper posted:

Speaking of Voodoo Kin Mafia, they were responsible for my favorite TNA angle of all time, which manages to be even worse than the Christy one.

Billy sacrifices himself in a Feast or Fired match to get Road Dogg one of the briefcases.

Road Dogg finds out the briefcase, surprise, is for a guaranteed Tag Title match

Road Dogg, instead of picking his long-time partner who is responsible for the title shot, picks his 80 year old father "bullet" bob armstrong to be his partner instead

Billy is angry that Road Dogg is wasting an opportunity that Billy earned on a vanity match with his father, which they end up losing because bob armstrong is 80.

Billy is the heel in this angle

This reminds me of when Don West was the heel for being upset that his best friend and co-commentator didn't have his back in a private meeting with management that could have led to him being fired

Aesop Poprock posted:

Russo has absolutely no idea how humans would think, feel or act in any situation. He's indescribably bizarre

Prokhor Zakharov
Dec 31, 2008


This is me as I make another great post


Good luck with your depression!

Tato posted:

Road Dogg had like 300 entrance themes in TNA. Each worse than the last.

The worst was one that started with a 911 call recording of "my god, they're in the house!" And then a guy going "James Gang biya biya". I wish I could find it again.

BIYA

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TLa6UCtYNxM

BIYA

Jerusalem
May 20, 2004

Would you be my new best friends?

Gold Sexy Body posted:

This is very funny and good, but the best VKM angle of all time is surely PAUL, MIKE, WE'LL BE WAITING FOR YA AT THA ALAMO

Then HHH got injured and Road Dogg stopped in the middle of a rant about PAUL AND MIKE to say,"Oh by the way sorry to hear about the injury, hope you get better soon man :shobon:"

They appeared at a WWE House Show during the middle of the angle too, and HHH saw them in the crowd and stopped to wave a happy hello to them :lol:

Gold Sexy Body
Nov 17, 2017
Probation
Can't post for 4 years!

Jerusalem posted:

Then HHH got injured and Road Dogg stopped in the middle of a rant about PAUL AND MIKE to say,"Oh by the way sorry to hear about the injury, hope you get better soon man :shobon:"

They appeared at a WWE House Show during the middle of the angle too, and HHH saw them in the crowd and stopped to wave a happy hello to them :lol:

FFS

sonicice
Oct 21, 2000

Michael J Beverage, I've got a bone to pick with you.
What's the worst

VKM
SEX
TNA

Gold Sexy Body
Nov 17, 2017
Probation
Can't post for 4 years!

sonicice posted:

What's the worst

VKM
SEX
TNA

They're all terrible FYI.

Renaissance Spam
Jun 5, 2010

Can it wait a for a bit? I'm in the middle of some *gyrations*


Mel Mudkiper posted:

Speaking of Voodoo Kin Mafia, they were responsible for my favorite TNA angle of all time, which manages to be even worse than the Christy one.

Billy sacrifices himself in a Feast or Fired match to get Road Dogg one of the briefcases.

Road Dogg finds out the briefcase, surprise, is for a guaranteed Tag Title match

Road Dogg, instead of picking his long-time partner who is responsible for the title shot, picks his 80 year old father "bullet" bob armstrong to be his partner instead

Billy is angry that Road Dogg is wasting an opportunity that Billy earned on a vanity match with his father, which they end up losing because bob armstrong is 80.

Billy is the heel in this angle

I actually remember this angle vividly because I think it was my first episode of TNA, specifically when Road Dogg told Billy he was picking his dad. I also remember thinking "oh yeah that's his shoot dad; that's actually pretty cool and this might go somewhere". Then I saw the next episode and thought "wow, this is really loving dumb"

I remember they were trying to use this to sell the whole Rough Cutz show (I think that's what it was called?) Because Billy and Dogg actually couldn't stand each other and had to air their laundry in shoot interviews.

Grendels Dad
Mar 5, 2011

Popular culture has passed you by.

Alaois posted:

bro, there ain't no such thing as faces and heels in real life

I have no face, and I must scream.

Pinche Rudo
Feb 8, 2005

I'm rudo irl

rovert
Jun 10, 2013
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O2ffXD4kAQQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BvLm00cwQUo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3bFWi5fmG9M

coconono
Aug 11, 2004

KISS ME KRIS

Billy Gunn angrily having to clean up the mess when TNA had an arena-wide roster brawl was peak Billy. I think this was the same brawl that had Sting selling Mesias throwing cardboard boxes at him like death.

DJExile
Jun 28, 2007


coconono posted:

Billy Gunn angrily having to clean up the mess when TNA had an arena-wide roster brawl was peak Billy. I think this was the same brawl that had Sting selling Mesias throwing cardboard boxes at him like death.

Lmao I remember this. It ruled

The D in Detroit
Oct 13, 2012

Grendels Dad posted:

I have no face, and I must scream.

Who is AM in this situation? Russo or Cornette?

Renaissance Spam
Jun 5, 2010

Can it wait a for a bit? I'm in the middle of some *gyrations*


SleepCousinDeath posted:

Who is AM in this situation? Russo or Cornette?

It's Jimmy. Nobody holds onto hate and resentment like Mama Cornette's little boy.

Mel Mudkiper
Jan 19, 2012

At this point, Mudman abruptly ends the conversation. He usually insists on the last word.

SleepCousinDeath posted:

Who is AM in this situation? Russo or Cornette?

It is TNA itself. Undying, hateful, isolated. Taking it's anger out on the few in its control.

rovert
Jun 10, 2013
Garrett isn't totally wrong

quote:

Aside from the lethargic crowd, from a sheer content perspective this was one of the best episodes of Impact this year. Storm and Lambert delivered killer promos, Gail Kim’s farewell was a touching moment, LAX vs. oVe was raw and kinetic while the Global title main event was the best Eli Drake has been presented as champion from a wrestling perspective to date. This was the most focused and clear episode of the year. Everything had plain purpose and it felt like everything was given its best opportunity to succeed. Watch this show.

http://www.voicesofwrestling.com/2017/11/17/impact-wrestling-on-pop-tv-november-16-results-review/

Super No Vacancy
Jul 26, 2012

i'm not gonna watch it

joylessdivision
Jun 15, 2013



Super No Vacancy posted:

i'm not gonna watch it

Aesop Poprock
Oct 21, 2008


Grimey Drawer
LAX is still a team??

Testekill
Nov 1, 2012

I demand to be taken seriously

:aronrex:

And just think Eric Young is main eventing a WWE PPV today

What I'm saying is that post-TNA motivation is a hell of a thing

grack
Jan 10, 2012

COACH TOTORO SAY REFEREE CAN BANISH WHISTLE TO LAND OF WIND AND GHOSTS!

Aesop Poprock posted:

LAX is still a team??

Hernandez is long, long gone.

J-Ro
Jul 26, 2005

Child Of The Revolution

LAX vs oVe and Drake vs Williams were indeed good matches.

Luigi Thirty
Apr 30, 2006

Emergency confection port.

sonicice posted:

What's the worst

VKM
SEX
TNA

SEX gave us the Old Sex Locker Room so it can’t be that
Without TNA there would be no SEX
Clearly it’s VKM by default

El Generico
Feb 3, 2009

Birds revere you and consider you one of their own.

You are welcome in their holy places.

Luigi Thirty posted:

SEX gave us the Old Sex Locker Room so it can’t be that
Without TNA there would be no SEX
Clearly it’s VKM by default

VKM was over though

OJ MIST 2 THE DICK
Sep 11, 2008

Anytime I need to see your face I just close my eyes
And I am taken to a place
Where your crystal minds and magenta feelings
Take up shelter in the base of my spine
Sweet like a chica cherry cola

-Cheap Trick

Nap Ghost

Aesop Poprock posted:

LAX is still a team??

it's now technically Homicide and EYFBO from the indies with Diamante and Konnan as managers.

Chris James 2
Aug 9, 2012


Hernandez blew it with the LU stuff lol

Benne
Sep 2, 2011

STOP DOING HEROIN
Hernandez being a dumbass who worked TV tapings while still under an LU non-compete -- thus getting weeks of TV scrapped, a main-event stable broken up off-screen, and multiple people fired/quitting -- is still hilarious to this day.

oatgan
Jan 15, 2009

tna, who had a legal department, taking his word for it and not bothering to check is the funny part

DJExile
Jun 28, 2007


oatgan posted:

tna, who had a legal department, taking his word for it and not bothering to check is the funny part

It's this, yeah

coconono
Aug 11, 2004

KISS ME KRIS

I really wish Hernandez did that on purpose but I think its pretty clear he didn't know what he signed at LU either.

grack
Jan 10, 2012

COACH TOTORO SAY REFEREE CAN BANISH WHISTLE TO LAND OF WIND AND GHOSTS!

oatgan posted:

tna, who had a legal department, taking his word for it and not bothering to check is the funny part

See, this raises an interesting question: Does TNA hire only stunningly incompetent people, or is there some sort of disease that affects everyone that works there?

Maxwell Lord
Dec 12, 2008

I am drowning.
There is no sign of land.
You are coming down with me, hand in unlovable hand.

And I hope you die.

I hope we both die.


:smith:

Grimey Drawer

grack posted:

See, this raises an interesting question: Does TNA hire only stunningly incompetent people, or is there some sort of disease that affects everyone that works there?

I still think there's a kind of curse at work. From Jim Crockett to WCW to WWA to TNA to GFW and back, they're just fated to make bad decisions.

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Randaconda
Jul 3, 2014

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
WCW at least had a successful run for a while, kicking off the wrestling boom.

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