MikeCrotch posted:

Meanwhile in C-SPAM:

Riggy posted:

Cool, I'll pick up a copy soon.

My guide had a fun little exchange with his grandfather when he asked him if he had committed any war crimes.

"Define war crime."

"Did you kill any prisoners?"

"I did not kill any American, British, French, or Spanish, no."

"What about the Russians?"

"We didn't take those vermin prisoner."

COMBAT posted:

As the mighty TINSMAN cuts through the calm of the blue Pacific, you are going to get a good long look at the ocean, so COMBAT is going to try to make you better acquainted. There‘s a lot of stuff that goes on in the dark down there in that ocean that you ought to know about and after seeing all these beautiful Pacific nights, you should be curious about the sky. You won‘t be surprised to learn that oceans cover 3/4ths of the surface of the earth; in fact you‘re probably wondering by now wotinhell‘s happened to that other 1/4 th . The average depth is 2 miles and once you get half a mile down it is pitch black. The deepest known place is 6.7 miles, off the Philippines, a nice tailor-made spot for depositing the Jap fleet. If you can imagine a pressure equal to about 20 boxcars loaded down with iron bars, you can imagine how uncomfortable Admiral Onochi and his honorable sons of heaven are going to be.

For a long time everybody assumed that no life could possibly exist on the bottom of the ocean, where there was no light and it was icy cold. Then a cable broke in the Mediterranean at 7000 feet depth and when they hauled up the broken ends they found an astounding variety of living creatures. They discovered many types of fish life that had searchlights custom-built into their foreheads so they could see in the black depths. As a matter of fact, if you want to knock off a few million pesetas in the next few years, dope out what makes these things glow. All the light we understand burns coal, gas, or chemicals, or electricity – where most of the energy is wasted in heat. If you can make a cold, clammy light like these animals make, you will have found the secret of pure light, and the world is yours. These things can live under this terrific pressure only because the pressure inside their bodies equals the pressure on the outside. But if they are swimming around looking for chow and dope off and drift up too high, the gases of their swimming bladders expand, they lose control of their muscles, shoot towards the surface, and blow up! Just like your mother told you not to run on the sidewalk because you might fall down, Mother Fish tells little Mortimer not too swim too high because he might fall up!



We all know that the big fishes live by gobbling up the little fishes, but did you ever wonder what the little fishes live on? They live on “diatoms” – which is a two-bit word for single-celled “algae” encased in a glass-like box. Now “algae” is not as you might think the nick-name for Algernon, but rather a nice name for scum. The shellbacks probably thought they were really getting us pollywogs sore when they called us “scum”, but we smiled sweetly with price, because we know all the time that the scum of the ocean is a marvelous, wonderful thing that is the basis of all life in the seas. We know all the time that if the shellbacks looked at scum through a microscope, they would find jewel-like single-celled creatures that are so graceful and delicately ornamental that no artistic jewelry could surpass them in beauty. We also know that it is this microscopic life in the water that causes that amazing phosphorescent glow that you see in our wake on a dark night – sometimes you will see a silver trail a mile long (let‘s hope we‘re the only ones that see it). We knew that scum was the basic food for both plant and animal life in the ocean, and that even after these scum creatures have died they were useful; whenever earthquakes have lifted portions of the sea bottom above the surface, these diatom shells have furnished insulating materials against heat and sound and helped make dynamite, rubber, cement, Old Dutch cleanser, and Ipana. So sticks and stones may hurt our bones, but names can never hurt us!

Easiest way to catch a shark: catch a “Remora” fish, which is a 2 foot job that attaches himself to larger fish by means of a great and powerful suction cup on the top of his head. Catch him alive, tie a line securely to his tail, turn him loose, and give him as much line as you can spare. He will fish for you, and after he has attached himself to a large shark (or turtle), haul them both in. Before you jump at conclusions: this is the STRAIGHT dope; many native fisherman in the Pacific use this method to catch large fish.

Some miscellaneous facts: pure sea water is a light shade of blue; the ocean is salty because of salt dumped into it by rivers; the Pacific is two feet higher than the Atlantic; (and) oceans once covered most of the middle west of the U.S.A. [A couple of lines of text are missing.]

Soft racket department: somehow manage to acquire a ship that has a bottom made of copper, sail around the South Sea Islands for a few months (making sure you have all the necessary supplies to make the cruise more enjoyable than a navy cruise), and then go into drydock. Hire a couple of flunkies to scrape the bottom and you stand down in the drydock with a bushel-basket and catch all the pure white silver that falls off the keel. You may think your old friend COMBAT is pumping out bum dope, but so help us it‘s a fact – there‘s a lot of silver in the ocean and a few companies have been formed to extract it by the chemical action of the copper bottoms in the salt water!



If you think you‘re pretty salty, here‘s a question for you: what are “Mother Carey‘s chickens”? All real sailors are supposed to know the answer. Give up? Mother Carey‘s chickens are petrels – one of the best fiends you have. After all the seagulls have deserted you, and after all the bosuns birds have dropped off, this friendly little bird will stick with you far, far out at sea. He is that brownish, blackish bird with the white tail that you‘ve seen hundreds of miles from land – he lives entirely on the sea, coming to shore only for a brief nesting period. Unlike most birds, his presence does not mean that land is nearby – he will wander over all the oceans.

Most of the times you‘ve pointed and said: “look at the porpoise”, you‘ve been wrong, because porpoise are strictly a coastal mammal, and what you are looking at are actually dolphins. The only difference is that the dolphin has a sharp beak-like nose and the porpoise does not. The dolphins favorite dish is the flying fish – and that‘s why the flying fish flies so much. By the way, the reason you might find a flying fish konked out on the deck sometimes is because they are attracted to shiny things and will make a leap at them. Native fisherman catch them by using mirrors and bright pieces of metal.

If you‘ll look closely at the heavens some night, you‘ll see some terrific sights. You may not always get the same vision that little Algae is getting in the picture, but you will usually see a beautiful array that will dazzle your eyes and excite your imagination. Scientists estimate that there are 30 billion stars; some are red hot like our sun, and some are dark like our earth. Men measure distance to the stars in terms of “light-years” – which is the distance light travels in one year at 186,000 miles per second. The nearest star outside our own sun and moon is 3.7 light-years away. It takes 8 minutes for the light from the sun to reach the earth; that means that sunset is actually 8 minutes before it looks like. If you are inclined to worry about BIG things – here‘s one for you – Sirious (the “Dog Star”), three times larger than us, is headed right for us on a collision course, at 360 miles a minute. At the present time Sirius is only 51,000,000,000,000 miles from the earth, so you‘d better straighten up and fly right!



If you‘ve ever seen Altair just after sunset, you were probably impressed by the beautiful colors you saw sparkling from the star – why does Altair sparkle blue, red, yellow, and white whereas other stars sparkle just plain white? It is because the comical elements of Altair are different, and in their burning give off differently colored flames. The larger known star is “BETELGUESE”, which has a diameter of about 250,000,000 miles. Very likely there are many more worlds revolving around suns with life similar to ours, although no evidence can possibly be obtained to prove their existence at the present time.

How hot is the sun? Temperature reading wouldn‘t make much sense; suffice it to say that if we were suddenly transplanted, ship and all, to the surface of the sun, we would vanish in a puff of gas. The only discouraging thing about all this is that the sun will someday cool, and we too will grow cold, and life will probably die on the earth. There is always hope for keeping warm and alive, though, as long as we have Harry James and Betty Grable.


*******************************************************
In answer to may shady rumors circulating about the ship saying that COMBAT dished out bum dope concerning those snapping shrimp in #4 – some of the boys listened and listened and heard no snaps. Not even one little crackle. COMBAT wisheds to point out that the snapping shrimp uses his snappers only to make love, and the mating season is September only. After all, the mating season takes a lot out of a shrimp and you can‘t expect him to snap all year ‘round!
*******************************************************

WHEN YOU WANT THE STRAIGHT DOPE, READ COMBAT DOPE SHEETS – WATCH FOR #6 – SOON !!

Panzeh posted:

I don't think there's anything wrong with reading it- if nothing else, you get a good idea of what Parshall is arguing against in his book.

oXDemosthenesXo posted:

COMBAT DOPE SHEET #5 Algae the Pollywog







I'm glad people are enjoying these.

Nebakenezzer posted:

So I'm writing the new sky boxes and it is infuriating me the liberties the RLM are taking with their designation system

Is that a...bad sign

Nebakenezzer posted:

So I'm writing the new sky boxes and it is infuriating me the liberties the RLM are taking with their designation system

Is that a...bad sign

Milo and POTUS posted:

Throatwarbler posted:

Spanish? Germany wasn't at war with Spain though?

Epicurius posted:

The civil war, maybe?

13th KRRC War Diary, 19th Dec 1917 posted:

Frost still holds. Enemy movement observed again at MAST FARM. Enemy aircraft was very active during the day. One E.A. was brought down in enemy's lines. Enemy's M.G's were very active from MAY FARM, CIRCUS POINT and BASSEVILLE CABARET. Work was carried on as usual.
At 9-45 our artillery put down a "barrage" for a "dummy" raid on GAME COPSE and MAY FARM, lasting for about 15 minutes.
No patrols went out tonight owing to enemy gas shells. Some of the patrol party were affected by it, but not for any length of time. Gas was first felt at 9-15 then very strongly at 9-45 pm.

Nebakenezzer posted:

SKY BOXES: Air Transports in the Second World War
This was extended to 20, with the other 10 being assigned the NONSENSICAL NOMENCLATURE B-0 WHAT ARE YOU DOING RLM YOU INVENT THIS OBSESSIVE CLASSIFICATION SYSTEM AND THEN YOU JUST MAKE poo poo UP LIKE AN INITIAL PRODUCTION B SERIES, GOD, YOU SICKEN ME

Because I HATE YOU SO MUCH, ....

oXDemosthenesXo posted:

COMBAT DOPE SHEET #5 Algae the Pollywog

I'm glad people are enjoying these.

Deptfordx posted:

I've a feeling this has been mentioned, might be thinking of 'Destroyer Captain'.

frankenfreak posted:

Meanwhile in PYF:

Comrade Koba posted:

Alfred and I strolled around the empty Charleville, and Alfred documented the occasion with his film camera. This recording I still have to this day, and although the colors are starting to fade, you can still recognize our faces and some of the surroundings.

COMBAT posted:

If the year was 1844 instead of 1944, and you were on an old wooden sailing vessel steaming into Seeadler Harbor, Looey the native would be standing on the shore looking you over and thinking what a nice roast of “long pig” you would make turning on a spit over a fire. Or if he got a close-up of the wrinkles and bumps in your shaven dome, he would think ”now wouldn’t that head look nice on the mantle right alongside that nice old missionary”. Luckily for you, tomorrow he will be standing on the shore loaded down with beads, shells, bananas, grass skirts, and pineapples thinking what a rooking he was going to give you sailors when you dropped the hook. As a matter of fact, though, even today if you stray too far into the bush you’re liable to hear swish and next thing find yourself hanging out to dry with everything below your chin missing. Whatever you do stay within sight of 51 and Winfield will pull you out of any tough spots.



Manus Island is a part of “Melanesia” (“islands of the blacks”) and is a real equatorial, jungle type of place. Of course, we’ll see the white man’s influence on the coastal settlements but generally the islands are still practicing their native forms of religion, which is mostly black magic and sorcery. Many native villages have a sacred house or other holy place where secret societies meet and religious ceremonies are held. Here also are kept sacred objects, such as images, drums, flutes, and masks. Keep away from these places unless you want your head to become a new addition to the collection of sacred objects. For the most part, native communities are self -sufficient, by gardening, hunting, and fishing. Slavery still exists – young men are often pressed into slavery for four years, under the white man’s government. One of the forms of currency used are sticks of black twist tobacco (26 sticks equals about 4 bucks). You’ll probably see the U.S.A. influence in clothes but some of the native guys and gals still run around in nothing but a “G” string composed of a shell, guord, or bark. And grass skirts are worn as well as well as sold around here. Speaking of women, they are pretty much kicked around and do all the dirty work. But, brother, the word is taboo and you know what we mean – the boys may kick them around but they don’t want any sympathy from you.

The Japs were fumigated out of Manus last March, but unfortunately another type of insect still exists: the mosquito. The female species is the malarial type: watch out for her. She is about the size of a humming bird and when she gets into her biting stance, she stands on her head instead of her feet like all other mosquitos (the goal) is to get a bigger and harder swing with her hypodermic needle. Incidentally, (she) has stingers at both ends so she can sting coming and going.

The outstanding thing about these Admiralty Islands, and all the East Indies Islands is that whatever happens out here, it happens BIG. Take for example their volcanoes – whereas most volcanoes just erupt and overflow, out here they actually blow up. Krakatoa Island, between Sumatra and Java, was blown sky high in 1883 by a volcanic explosion and the shock was felt right straight through the whole diameter of the earth; dust and pumice were blown 30 miles high and high winds carried the stuff clear around to Europe; the effect of this stuff in the air made extra-brilliant sunsets all over the world for months after, and it caused a tidal wave of 120 feet. Whereas before the explosion the island was 5 miles by 3 miles, it suddenly became 3 miles by 2 miles.



The business of doing everything up big is also reflected in the plant and animal life. At last you’re getting into these jungle places where things are really rough. This is where those big ugly bruiser crocodiles hang out, and there’ll be no swimming if we anchor anywhere near the mouth of a river. The monsters have even scared the pants off the natives. Watch out for that big yellow and black-banded water snake, too. If we anchor close to the beach, Tuesday morning you’ll be awakened by a jazz band that will sound considerably different than any you’ve ever(y) heard – for that is exactly what the amazing jungle birds sound like in the early morn. One in particular is a big black bird that can’t fly – the “CASSOWARY”. He’s a pain in the neck as far as the band is concerned because all he can do is grunt, moan, and bellow, but he’s too big and rough to chase away from the jam session. He stands 5 feet tall and he can kick as hard as a Missouri mule (he is equipped with huge, powerful legs). If he’s in a foul enough mood, which he always is, he can deliver a kick that will finish you but fast! To help things along he has a spear-like quill set-up in his wings and toes that can stab you to a bloody pulp. Just take a look at that old sourpuss! One of his playmates is our old friend Reddy th Fox, only down here Reddy has grown himself a set of wings 4 feet in diameter and he flies instead of hiking it. Can you imagine a hound chasing one of these foxes when suddenly the fox took off like a P-38 and whipped around and snapped Rover’s tail off on the fly? One thing about these giant flying foxes is that where their lowlier ancestors had to eat field mice and stuff – they won’t eat anything but fruit! A few of them can put an awful nick in an orchard in a few hours. Just to top things off, on Manus Island butterflies are as large asbluejays, pigeons are always the size of turkeys, and any rat under two feet long has an inferiority complex. You’ll see huge flocks of beautiful flocks of white cockatoos (a kind of parrot) flying around the treetops, screaming like hell. There are kangaroos here, too, and they can climb trees – the adult ones jump from tree to tree without touching the ground, just like Tarzan!

If you see Looey tossing big white peanuts into his mouth, don’t stick out your hand and say “gimme”, because very likely Looey is eating that jungle delicacy – big, white, live, juicy wood grubs. Another choice dish is roast lizard tails, medium rare, please. The boys also like birds and burble eggs without removing the shell, and if they’re hungry, without removing the nest either. COMBAT hesitates to state that the harbor is teaming with fish because the last time we did there wasn’t a good enough fisherman aboard to do anything about it. But just to help you out: here’s a hot tip on how the natives catch ’em – dig the root of a vine called “derris” and scrape it until a thick white fluid oozes out. Find yourself some calm water and dump in the juice. Within two minutes, COMBAT guarantees that all kinds of fish will come floating to the surface, knocked out cold. And believe it or not the cannibal natives in the interior mix this juice with crocodile blood and drink it like rum! If you see a native with dark purple stains all over his teeth and mouth, don’t think he’s just polished off a blue blood – very likely he’s just a peaceful Looey who has been chewing “betel nuts”, and what Wrigley is to America, betel is to Manus. One of the things the Australian government has done has been to promote good will between the native tribes, who are used to fueding just like those “reckless mountain boys”. They cleverly introduced the American game of football as a substitute for tribal warfare, to work off excess steam. The two main tribes are the “salt water people” who live on the shores and the “bush people” who live in the interior. These grudge battles for the league championship make the Army Navy game look like a waltzing contest – although the natives go for football, they don’t go for the rule-book very much. After a few (years) of football, the Australian government urged the natives to go back to tribal (warfare) in order to stop the excessive bloodshed – but no sir the natives they go (for) this football stuff! There goes Looey around left end, stiff- arming the (“bushw)hackers” with a carving knife – we want a touchdown, rah, rah, rah!

mllaneza posted:

Please say you found the film.

mllaneza posted:

The Fuchida book is not, it's a good narrative of the battle and an entertaining read, but key moments are fabricated. Destroyer Captain hasn't been debunked, but there's a few passages I could pick out as having been written with hindsight. Anyway, read Destroyer Captain, it's one of the great first hand accounts of any war.

13th KRRC War Diary, 20th Dec 1917 posted:

No movement on the part of the enemy was observed, owing to a thick fog during the day.
In the evening two patrols tried to go out. but returned owing to the darkness.
Usual work of improvement was carried on.
The enemy put down a fairly heavy barrage on TOP HOUSE group which lasted for about 40 minutes. No action was taken by the enemy.

Slim Jim Pickens posted:

I have a confession to make: I am a firm believer in the efficacy of bat bombs. Somebody please convince me otherwise.

Cyrano4747 posted:

I mean, they're OK but they have very narrow fields of application.

Here's a documentary on the subject.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9dghbyBaQyI

Shimrra Jamaane posted:

How the gently caress did over 8 million people die during the 30 Years War? That's gotta be the most deadly war in the Western World until WW1 right?

Shimrra Jamaane posted:

How the gently caress did over 8 million people die during the 30 Years War? That's gotta be the most deadly war in the Western World until WW1 right?

Slim Jim Pickens posted:

I have a confession to make: I am a firm believer in the efficacy of bat bombs. Somebody please convince me otherwise.

Slim Jim Pickens posted:

I have a confession to make: I am a firm believer in the efficacy of bat bombs. Somebody please convince me otherwise.

HEY GUNS posted:

food supplies got hosed up, disease