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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 11, 2024 23:18
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- Leraika
- Jun 14, 2015
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Luckily, I *did* save your old avatar. Fucked around and found out indeed.
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Mud pit throw down woooo
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Dec 23, 2017 20:48
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- AweStriker
- Oct 6, 2014
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I threw it to the GROUND!
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Dec 23, 2017 21:04
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- Friend Commuter
- Nov 3, 2009
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SO CLEVER I WANT TO FUCK MY OWN BRAIN.
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Smellrose
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Hold it up to the light, maybe? I have no drat idea.
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Dec 23, 2017 21:07
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- Austin S
- Jul 2, 2005
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From the earth the mud beast was formed, and to the earth it shall return.
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Dec 23, 2017 21:50
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- AnAnonymousIdiot
- Sep 14, 2013
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Mud beast, head toward the light!
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Dec 23, 2017 22:25
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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quote:
You throw the mud beast to the ground with all your might. "SSSKWIIISHSH-BOOOOOOM!" There's an explosion of oozy mud. Mud fills the air. You're thrown to the floor. Everything goes dark.
When you open your eyes, you see the bare bulb hanging down from the ceiling above you. But it's not the bare bulb in the Medieval Museum. It's the one right in your own garage!
"Hahahahahaha..." You hear laughter. Your heart skips a beat. Is it the Evil Knight?
You sit up. It's only Kip and Abbey. They're sitting next to you laughing and pointing at you. The two crates stand silent and still. There's nothing strange going on here at all. Except for the fact that you, Kip, and Abbey are all safe. There's no trace of mud anywhere. Were the Mud Slingers and the Evil Knight all in your imagination?
"Did you see anything weird a moment ago?" you ask your cousins.
"Not me," Kip says innocently.
"Not I," Abbey corrects him.
"I either, I guess," you say.
"Me either," Abbey corrects you. "Don't you know anything?"
One thing you aren't imagining. Abbey hasn't changed a bit. She always has to have the last word in
THE END
I think I'd hate this ghost writer slightly less if he actually had the balls to kill us for leaving his lovely railroad instead of pulling this "all just a dream" bullshit.
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Parchment Piece
Goal Endings: 0.5/1
Bad Endings
Turned into one of the Evil Knight's servants.
Trapped in a wall of mud by the Mud Slingers.
Thrown off a mountain and turned to stone.
Turned into a flower by a three-headed man.
Fused with Kip and Abbey into a three-headed monster.
Forcibly inducted into an order of ghost-monks.
 Subjected to the least plausible "dream" ending yet.
Achievements
Rage from a Page: Wasted time on the most pointless fourth-wall reference ever.
I Meant To Do That: Encountered a total of 100 bad endings.
Our options posted:
- Follow the right pixie.
- Try to find our way out of the maze.
- Go back into the maze.
- Say Abbey comes back right away.
- Turn left on the giant bird.
- Turn right on the giant bird.
- Say we aren't ready to fight the Knight.
- Hold the Mud Slinger up to the light.
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Dec 24, 2017 23:06
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- AweStriker
- Oct 6, 2014
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WHAT.
We shall fill this dark tale with LIIIIIIIGHT
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Dec 24, 2017 23:37
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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quote:
Your hunch is right! When you hold the muddy glop up to the light, it disappears! You grab another Mud Slinger, hold it up, look right through it, and it too is gone!
Now Kip and Abbey are snagging Mudmen too. One by one the grubby gremlins are grabbed and held up to the light. Soon the whole muddy mass of them disappears and the walls turn white.
You and your cousins fall in a heap on the floor. "Whew!" Kip tries to catch his breath. "Was that close, or what?"
"And totally disgusting!" Abbey adds. "I appreciate a good mud facial as much as the next girl, but that was ridiculous."
"It was a pretty dirty trick." You actually agree with Queen Abbey for a change. "But now what? We still haven't found that missing armor. Do we just walk on out of here and go home?"
"You said it, cousin!" Abbey's not too worried about any missing suits of armor.
"I don't know," Kip says. "Dad is going to go berserk when he finds out we lost the Sir Edmund suit! He'll be here next week. If we don't find it, I don't want to be the one to open the door for him!"
"Speaking of doors," Abbey interrupts, "look over there! There's a whole wall of doors. One of them has to be the way out of this stuffy room."
quote:
Abbey rushes toward the wall of doors. She's just about to reach the handle on the first door when her foot slips on something. "Another piece of parchment!" she cries out.
You and Kip run to join her. She holds a jagged-edged scrap of parchment in her hands. It's just like the other one you found. She reads it to you:
"...beware his deadly charge and feel...
That's it. That's all it says."
"There's got to be more," you insist.
"Deadly charge," Abbey repeats. "I know about charging things. Sounds like someone's going to be doing some killer shopping!"
"Very funny," Kip says sarcastically.
"Maybe not to a jerk like you," Abbey shoots back.
"Oh yeah?" Kip threatens.
"Good comeback," Abbey taunts.
"Hey, hold it. Hold it," you say. "We need to work together here. These scraps of paper are obviously meant to be clues. I've got a feeling they'll lead us to the missing armor, if we pay attention. Until then anything could happen."
quote:
You take the other scrap of parchment out of your pocket and try to fit the two pieces together. None of the edges match up.
"Never mind that stupid puzzle!" Abbey bursts out. "I want out of here now!*
Without waiting another second, Abbey runs to the other side of the room and tries the knob on the first door. But as she turns it, the door disappears and becomes solid white wall again!
She tries the next door. Gone!
And the next one. And the next one. And the next one.
Gone. Gone. Gone. Right from under her hand!
"If the doors keep disappearing, we'll be stuck in here forever!" Kip says in a panic.
"We have to get out," you shout. "And fast! Look! These walls are closing in on us! We'll be crushed!"
Inch by inch the floor space narrows. The walls are grinding in on your little group.
"Try another door, Abbey!" Kip screams, as the wall behind him pushes against his back. "The room is shrinking! We'll be squashed like bugs!"
Evil laughter booms through the shrinking room. "He's here!" Abbey shrieks. "The Knight in Screaming Armor. He's here!"
quote:
You can't see the Evil Knight, but you know he's here somewhere. His hideous laughter turns to screams and back to laughter again. This shrinking room is a tiny torture chamber. And it's getting tinier by the second.
You brace yourself against one of the advancing walls in a frantic attempt to hold it back. You strain against it with all of your strength. "Aaaaaaaaaaaaah!" you yell as your muscles begin to burn and ache. "Try another door, Abbey!" you gasp out. "quick!" But Abbey is paralyzed with fear. She doesn't move a muscle.
Your ear is pushed up against the crushing wall. There is a terrible grinding sound behind it. Your feet start to skid and slip.
"The door, Kip! The door!" you scream.
"But there are two doors left," Kip cries. "Which door should I open?"
"The right one!" you yell back. "Open the right one!"
If the door on the right is the right one, turn to PAGE 42.
If the door on the left is the right one, turn to PAGE 59.
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
2 Parchment Pieces
Goal Endings: 0.5/1
Bad Endings
Turned into one of the Evil Knight's servants.
Trapped in a wall of mud by the Mud Slingers.
Thrown off a mountain and turned to stone.
Turned into a flower by a three-headed man.
Fused with Kip and Abbey into a three-headed monster.
Forcibly inducted into an order of ghost-monks.
Subjected to the least plausible "dream" ending yet.
Achievements
Rage from a Page: Wasted time on the most pointless fourth-wall reference ever.
I Meant To Do That: Encountered a total of 100 bad endings.
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Dec 25, 2017 16:34
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- AweStriker
- Oct 6, 2014
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Obviously the door to the right is the door on the right.
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Dec 25, 2017 17:03
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- DreamingofRoses
- Jun 27, 2013
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Nap Ghost
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This book is dumb.
Go left, let’s see if they keep the Stine tradition.
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Dec 25, 2017 22:31
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- AnAnonymousIdiot
- Sep 14, 2013
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Go right
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Dec 25, 2017 23:12
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- PZ Smeltzenseltzer
- Feb 3, 2008
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fortran
~*with style*~
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This book is dumb.
Go left, let’s see if they keep the Stine tradition.
Agreed (on both counts). Normally I’d vote right here to try and get the death but I don’t want to spend more time on this book than we need to.
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Dec 26, 2017 00:42
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- Leraika
- Jun 14, 2015
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Luckily, I *did* save your old avatar. Fucked around and found out indeed.
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coinflip says go right
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Dec 26, 2017 04:18
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- PumpkinBat
- Oct 22, 2012
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Did the author really just phone it in?
I know my vote is redundant at this point, but might as well confirm it.
Left is correct.
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Dec 26, 2017 15:59
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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quote:
Kip decides the right door is the left one. He reaches for the handle on the left. When his hand is only inches from it, sparks fly off the handle. Kip jumps back. "Whoa! It's electrically charged!" he cries.
You stop holding the walls apart long enough to reach for the door handle. More sparks shoot into the air. A rapid-fire zapping noise crackles around you. It sounds like the bug zapper on the roof of the Dairy Queen on a muggy summer night.
You try the door one more time. ZZZZAPPPPPPP! A charge of electrical current sputters and sparks first around Abbey, then around you, and finally around Kip.
The three of you light up like electrical lawn ornaments at Christmastime. Abbey's long blond hair stands straight up. She's a human firecracker, and so are you and Kip!
You try to turn back and escape the shock treatment, but you have no choices here.
quote:
The electrical charge fuses you, Kip, and Abbey together. You can't pull yourselves apart.
With the room now the size of a walk-in closet and getting smaller by the second, you can barely move. Each movement causes a shower of new sparks to rain down over your heads. You can't even stretch your arms up enough to shelter yourselves from the biting, burning sparks.
All you can do is wait. You hope the sparks and the deadly charge surging through you will stop before it's too late.
quote:
"Zzzzt! Zzzzt! Zzzt zzzt zzttt!" You try to speak, but the only thing coming out of your mouth are sparks!
"Zzzzt zzzt!" Abbey adds her two sparks.
"Zzzzzzzzt! Zzzzzzzt!" Kip sparks loudest of all. He's holding up the second piece of parchment with the warning about "his deadly charge."
If you could talk you would remind Kip - you already saw that piece of the puzzle. You figure that this electrically charged state you're all in is what the piece of parchment warned you about.
Kip waves the parchment at you. "Zzzzt zt!" he says.
"Zzt zzzzt!" you agree. Sure you'll take another look at the piece of parchment. You try to see through all the sparks to what is written there. Here's the real shocker - new words have appeared! You read to yourself:
...beware his deadly charge and feel
That what is NOW is not what's real.
Aha! Now you get it!
If what you get is what you see, turn to PAGE 34.
If what you get is what you wish you never saw, turn to PAGE 76.
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
2 Parchment Pieces
Goal Endings: 0.5/1
Bad Endings
Turned into one of the Evil Knight's servants.
Trapped in a wall of mud by the Mud Slingers.
Thrown off a mountain and turned to stone.
Turned into a flower by a three-headed man.
Fused with Kip and Abbey into a three-headed monster.
Forcibly inducted into an order of ghost-monks.
Subjected to the least plausible "dream" ending yet.
Achievements
Rage from a Page: Wasted time on the most pointless fourth-wall reference ever.
I Meant To Do That: Encountered a total of 100 bad endings.
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Dec 26, 2017 19:11
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- rudecyrus
- Nov 6, 2009
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fuck you trolls
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What?
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Dec 27, 2017 01:01
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- VivaLa Eeveelution
- Apr 3, 2011
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I wish I never saw this book.
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Dec 27, 2017 01:04
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- DreamingofRoses
- Jun 27, 2013
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Nap Ghost
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I wish I never saw this book.
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Dec 27, 2017 03:00
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- PumpkinBat
- Oct 22, 2012
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I...don't even understand this choice?
So since I don't see it at all, I guess I wish I never saw this?
PumpkinBat fucked around with this message at 14:19 on Dec 27, 2017
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Dec 27, 2017 14:15
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- CaptainCaveman
- Apr 16, 2005
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Always searching for North.
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Choose secret option to pull ejector seat lever on book.
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Dec 27, 2017 17:37
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- PumpkinBat
- Oct 22, 2012
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This is not the writing of a bad writer.
This is the writing of a man that has been wronged, and seeks vengeance via any means.
I'll just choose randomly;
The right door is the right one.
EDIT: Shouldn't one of the options listed be "What you get is what you see"?
PumpkinBat fucked around with this message at 17:50 on Dec 27, 2017
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Dec 27, 2017 17:47
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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Just to clarify, the "press X to not die" option at the bottom is supposed to be the "what you get is what you see". That's my fault for not making that clear enough.
quote:
Kip decides the right door is the door on the right. The handle turns easily under his hand. He pushes the door open with his shoulder and falls through. You grab Abbey and throw yourself through the opening just in time. The walls grind together behind you. They make a horrible screech like fingernails across a chalkboard. You cover your ears in pain but then all is silent.
Or maybe not quite silent. As your ears become accustomed to the quiet you hear something. It's a ticking.
"Tick, tock, tick tock..." you hear.
"Clocks!" Abbey shouts gleefully. "Hundreds of them! And they're all different!" The ticking gives way to bongs and cuckoos and chimes of all sorts. The walls around you, the ceiling, even the doors of this new room are covered with clocks. Clocks of all shapes and sizes.
A flashing sign on the wall greets you with the words:
TAKE YOUR TIME LEAVING
"What a relief," you say. "At least clocks can't hurt us."
"Right!" Kip agrees. "But with all of them ticking and bonging, gonging, and going cuckoo at once it could drive us crazy in no time!"
"Well, that's the one thing there isn't any of here." You laugh. "No time. Time is all we've got in this place!"
quote:
"Look at this one!" Abbey calls out. She's pointing to an antique cuckoo clock standing on the floor in a corner.
The clock is mostly black. But its designs are painted with silver, gold, and blue, and it's decorated with scrolls, carvings, knobs, and buttons. It has a white face and gold hands and numbers.
You glance at the clock and feel an odd sense of doom about it. You wouldn't be at all surprised if the door opened up and a hideous bird flew out! Something about this clock looks strangely familiar to you. Where have you seen it before?
If you think you know where you've seen this clock before, turn to PAGE 46.
If another clock hanging on the wall next to this one catches your eye, turn to PAGE 93.
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
2 Parchment Pieces
Goal Endings: 0.5/1
Bad Endings
Turned into one of the Evil Knight's servants.
Trapped in a wall of mud by the Mud Slingers.
Thrown off a mountain and turned to stone.
Turned into a flower by a three-headed man.
Fused with Kip and Abbey into a three-headed monster.
Forcibly inducted into an order of ghost-monks.
Subjected to the least plausible "dream" ending yet.
Crushed to death while contemplating the nature of time.
Achievements
Rage from a Page: Wasted time on the most pointless fourth-wall reference ever.
I Meant To Do That: Encountered a total of 100 bad endings.
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Dec 28, 2017 04:45
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- Leraika
- Jun 14, 2015
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Luckily, I *did* save your old avatar. Fucked around and found out indeed.
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This is our 'have you read a goosebumps book that isn't this one' choice, isn't it
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Dec 28, 2017 04:51
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 11, 2024 23:18
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- AweStriker
- Oct 6, 2014
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Oh, this clock is metaphorically ringing a bell, in addition to literally.
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Dec 28, 2017 06:09
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Dec 23, 2017 20:23
