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timber, the app where trees meet other trees grindr for trees is a really different thing from human grindr, tho |
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Dec 24, 2017 21:28
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A funeral where the eulogizer doesn't talk about the deceased's family, accomplishments, or hobbies, but instead talks about their favorite Internet memes. |
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Dec 25, 2017 12:33
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DragQueenofAngmar posted:timber, the app where trees meet other trees They'll send each other lines like oh baby, I've fallen for you. |
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Dec 25, 2017 12:35
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Tommy Lee Jones' speech from No Country For Old Men about being older than his dead dad except I'm upset that I am older than the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles |
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Dec 25, 2017 20:20
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the octogenarian mutant ninja turtles
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Dec 25, 2017 21:07
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got any sevens posted:the octogenarian mutant ninja turtles Leonardo leads, Donatello does machines (to help him breathe) |
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Dec 26, 2017 00:57
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Drink-Mix Man posted:Leonardo leads, Donatello does machines (to help him breathe) Raphael is cool but rude And it's not his fault, it's the dementia dude! |
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Dec 26, 2017 02:03
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I Dunno posted:They'll send each other lines like oh baby, I've fallen for you. "wood" |
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Dec 26, 2017 02:21
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canyoneer posted:Raphael is cool but rude michaelangelo is coming apart, dude (at the joints) ---------------- |
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Dec 26, 2017 02:30
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Grandpa Detective: America's Frailest Crime Fighter this Saturday only on CBS. |
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Dec 27, 2017 04:22
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A morning show where the existential dread is creeping in around the edges. |
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Dec 27, 2017 05:02
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They brought in a new efficiency expert at work, a Skeleton on a Horse. Not the worst manager I ever had. Does a lot of looming and staring at you with those flaming eyes, while drinking its decaf coffee. Not sure how it got the horse in the elevator though. |
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Dec 27, 2017 05:09
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a traveling libertarian lecturer who sells a service of him giving evening seminars on how to properly lecture about libertarianism.
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Dec 27, 2017 09:37
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I want a Twitter account that just posts an entry from this thread once a day, can that be arranged |
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Dec 27, 2017 10:10
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^thats a good idea |
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Dec 27, 2017 21:53
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Toes are the fingers of the feet. |
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Dec 29, 2017 18:57
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Really ugly grudge fights, slander, and mud-dragging rivalries between various animal conservation facilities over methods, ethics, and staff proclivities. Accusations of bad record keeping, cloning, inbreeding, bizarre experiments, researcher perversions, and so forth. someone from the Washington Post wins a Pulitzer for their article about it all. ---------------- |
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Dec 30, 2017 04:54
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WHO ARE THE REAL ANIMALS HERE??!!!
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Dec 30, 2017 06:14
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ShinyBirdTeeth posted:A morning show where the existential dread is creeping in around the edges. |
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Dec 30, 2017 07:23
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handjob? I thought you wanted a hamjob
CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE: |
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Dec 31, 2017 07:19
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A bit late but metal holiday music 🎵 Two minutes to Christmas! 🎵 Little Baby I am a poor boy too I have no gift to bring That's fit to give the King Shall I play for you, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R0wHLwMr2l8 |
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Dec 31, 2017 07:43
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ghost emoji posted:handjob? I thought you wanted a hamjob pigs could never pull off a big heist, there's always a squealer |
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Dec 31, 2017 18:11
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The rest of the BK Kids Club beating "Wheels" into the gang. |
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Jan 2, 2018 20:36
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Hazing rituals of the Keebler elves |
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Jan 2, 2018 20:37
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a grandpa complaining that kids today have it too easy with their smartphones. back in his day, when he wanted to talk on the phone while taking a crap, he had to pull in the entire cord and handset with him.
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Jan 2, 2018 21:38
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Kids on their bikes complaining about how easy their grandpa with his sicknasty Harley Davidson has it in the present day. |
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Jan 2, 2018 22:10
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You old people today are punks, with your senior discounts and your pants pulled all the way up. Back in my day which is right now we pay full price for things with our pants sagging all the way down and I don't recall hearing anyone complain about it except old people constantly.
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Jan 3, 2018 00:55
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*Pop, the only surviving member of the Rice Krispies Krew doing a scared straight type thing to young cartoon characters at risk for getting into the cereal hustle.* You think this is a loving game kid? Yeah, you see all the money, the adoring sugar addict kids, having your own commercial but while the game has you blinded you don't see the real poo poo coming to sideswipe you like the Count Chocula crew shooting up your house because you tried just one loving time to muscle in on his turf with chocolate Rice Krispies. Why you think there's only one Cinnamon Toast Crunch chef left, huh? They thought they could handle Tony the Tiger but big Tony didn't think that was so grrrrreat.
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Jan 3, 2018 01:22
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Chef Wendel can see why kids love the taste of cinnamon toast crunch. But can he see a tiger stalking him from the reeds before it's too late |
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Jan 3, 2018 01:38
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I think hardened cereal/food mascots would be a good thread, if u don't wanna make it i will |
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Jan 3, 2018 01:41
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alnilam posted:I think hardened cereal/food mascots would be a good thread, if u don't wanna make it i will I just did a gritty Sesame Street thread but if you think byob can handle two rough and tumble threads at the same time go for it.
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Jan 3, 2018 02:02
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2Can $am follows his nose... to blow |
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Jan 3, 2018 02:04
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Koishi Komeiji posted:*Pop, the only surviving member of the Rice Krispies Krew doing a scared straight type thing to young cartoon characters at risk for getting into the cereal hustle.* Cereal Killa Mike ---------------- |
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Jan 3, 2018 02:36
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2Chainz walks into the Schnucks to buy some groceries, and has a wacky adventure.
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Jan 3, 2018 06:54
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i'm a little late on this one but it would be funnty if the three kings tried to give baby jesus bitcoin
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Jan 3, 2018 17:02
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Balthasar: Here's .3btc. Mary: Thanks but we're really in need of some Frankincense. Balthasar: You can get that with bitcoin. Mary: Not since Silk Road shut down. ---------------- |
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Jan 3, 2018 17:03
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A sci fi and fantasy author who's really just hungry: Empress Kay Sadhila and her henchman the Count Monte Cristo have invaded the hiveworld Suet. Our dashing hero Cod Linguica springs into action. |
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Jan 3, 2018 17:07
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ShinyBirdTeeth posted:A sci fi and fantasy author who's really just hungry: The hero had muttonchops and cornrow hair, topping off his beer-belly figure ---------------- |
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Jan 3, 2018 17:26
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ShinyBirdTeeth posted:A sci fi and fantasy author who's really just hungry: Bick Spurlington ran towards the Teleporter. But first, he stopped at the replicator and made a ham. Then he ate the ham. It was salty and delicious. Red lights flashed all around him as a mechanical female voice intoned "Hull Breach Imminent. Hull Breach Imminent." There was no time to lose. He replicated Honey-Poached Pears with Hazelnut Butter and a Buttermilk Ice Cream. The exquisite mouthfeel of the warm pears melting into the chill ice cream reminded him of his childhood on the planet F'run G'farr. There were only seconds left before the starship's exterior lost its integrity. Wasting no time, he waddled in a satisfied manner towards the Teleporter and punched in the coordinates for the nearest McDonalds. ---------------- |
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Jan 3, 2018 17:28
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| # ? May 9, 2024 21:12 |
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Blade Runner about food: "I want more fries fucker." *** "You're in a Mexican restaurant, walking up to the counter, when all of a sudden you look down..." "What one?" "What?" "What restaurant?" "It doesn't make any difference what restaurant, it's completely hypothetical." "But, how come I'd be there?" "Maybe you're hungry. Maybe your're hungover. Who knows? You look down and see a torta, Leon." "Torta? What's that?" "You know what a sandwich is?" "Of course!" "Same thing." "I've never eaten a sandwich... But I understand what you mean." "You reach down and take the top piece of bread off the torta, Leon." "Do you make up these questions, Mr. Bourdain? Or do they write 'em down for you?" "The torta lays open-faced, the jamon and avacado inside glistening, beckoning to be eaten, but it can't. Not without your help. But you're not eating." "What do you mean, I'm not eating?" "I mean: you're not eating! Why is that, Leon?" [Leon licks his lips] |
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Jan 3, 2018 18:40
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