17-18 F1 Off-Season: <INSERT TEAM HERE> is bad, OP. Especially

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > 17-18 F1 Off-Season: <INSERT TEAM HERE> is bad, OP. Especially

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Theophany: Jul 22, 2014; SUCCHIAMI IL MIO CAZZO DA DIETRO, RANA RAGAZZO

2022 FIA Formula 1 WDC

Wirth1000 posted:

We need to put things in perspective here for Lance Stroll. He is only 19 years of age and to be able to handle and compete in Formula 1-- especially this era of brutal cars which are the fastest in F1 history --is even more impressive. A podium in his debut season at a hugely high attrition race at that is amazing. Yes, some people call it a fluke but there are no flukes in racing. He managed to keep his car on the track and his nose clean as the race went on and on. That is pure commitment and concentration right there. No one should give a gently caress about his financial background either. Sure, his dad is one of the richest men in the world but there's diminishing returns on just how far wealth can get you in racing.

The Pasta God himself, Barilla whatever, raced in F1 and his pastabillions didn't get him even a podium. Lance is also a dominant beast in his junior category. If you want to talk about how his dad actually bought enough engineers, parts, anmd whatever else Prema needed in F3 and that team was operating at basically an F1 level Vs. the rest of the actual F3 field then gently caress you. You just don't get it. An executive chef can make the greatest dish in the world, put it in front of you, and it all will be for nothing if all you do is smash your face into the plate. It takes commitment and skill to utilize the knife and fork to extract the maximum taste of whatever the gently caress you just ordered.

This is Lance. And he's going to put that Putin Puppet Russian gently caress in his place. Sirotkin is going to be Sir Rotted Kin by the time Lance is done with him. The Russian Evil Empire picked the wrong team, place, and time to put their doped up piece of poo poo in and Lance, my Canadian Pride & Joy, is going to show you what the civilized free world can do in the face of a rotten evil genetically predisposed-to-dourness vodka-bag.

It's going to be scary seeing Lance grow up and gain experience in F1. It's going to be real scary.... everyone should be scared. I'm scared.

Good lad.

DoctorGonzo posted:

the more disgusting thing in this picture is the blue f40. What the gently caress is this poo poo?

# ? Jan 16, 2018 19:35

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# ? May 31, 2024 09:11

Norns: Nov 21, 2011; Senior Shitposting Strategist

Lol gently caress

# ? Jan 16, 2018 19:35

GOOD TIMES ON METH: Mar 17, 2006; Fun Shoe

The three minute gap in between asking about a fursona and posting Ferrari furry art is impressive

# ? Jan 16, 2018 19:39

Nill: Aug 24, 2003

Now do Lewis Hamilton.

# ? Jan 16, 2018 19:40

F1DriverQuidenBerg: Jan 19, 2014

The first thing to say is that I tried reading this as a book but I can't actually read books and huge sections of it are in french so I couldn't be bothered and got the unabridged audiobook.

The second thing to say is that I had assumed this would be like Victor Hugo's Les Miserables where the first five hours had like no loving bearing on the larger novel. This turned out to be incredibly wrong and so many of the loving characters have similar sounding names that I have no idea of who is doing what but just have a broader idea of what's going on in the plot at the time.

As a broad overview War and Peace covers the later stages of the Napoleonic Wars from the viewpoint of the Russian upper classes and documents what is widely acknowledged to be the decline of Napoleon's military prowess and ability to control the French Empire. Our novel starts in 1805, Russian society is highly segmented into a class system, serfdom is still widely used and Russia is an absolute monarchy that is largely insulated from most of Western Europe and has been unaffected by the French Revolution.

# ? Jan 16, 2018 19:41

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

1500quidporsche posted:

The first thing to say is that I tried reading this as a book but I can't actually read books and huge sections of it are in french so I couldn't be bothered and got the unabridged audiobook.

The second thing to say is that I had assumed this would be like Victor Hugo's Les Miserables where the first five hours had like no loving bearing on the larger novel. This turned out to be incredibly wrong and so many of the loving characters have similar sounding names that I have no idea of who is doing what but just have a broader idea of what's going on in the plot at the time.

As a broad overview War and Peace covers the later stages of the Napoleonic Wars from the viewpoint of the Russian upper classes and documents what is widely acknowledged to be the decline of Napoleon's military prowess and ability to control the French Empire. Our novel starts in 1805, Russian society is highly segmented into a class system, serfdom is still widely used and Russia is an absolute monarchy that is largely insulated from most of Western Europe and has been unaffected by the French Revolution.

Sir, the question was, is this your handwriting?

# ? Jan 16, 2018 19:42

Rev. Dr. Moses P. Lester: Oct 3, 2000

F1 2018: Lance is also a dominant beast

# ? Jan 16, 2018 19:47

Wirth1000: May 12, 2010; #essereFerrari

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V7W2WI11jFE

jesus christ he doesn't smile once. the most dour gently caress

# ? Jan 16, 2018 19:53

Norns: Nov 21, 2011; Senior Shitposting Strategist

He's Russian dude come on

# ? Jan 16, 2018 20:04

Wirth1000: May 12, 2010; #essereFerrari

Gonna post this here cause gently caress it it's Sainz Jr's dad involved.

Basically, during Dakar, some guy competing on a quad said that Carlos Sainz hit him with his car. Sainz denies this and said that while it was close if he actually did hit another competitor that was on a quadbike then it'd be very loving obvious and they'd be dealing with a much more serious situation. After the organizers took a look they slapped Sainz with a penalty even though they admitted they couldn't really tell if the damage on the quad bike was sustained from an impact with a car or just from Koolen losing control on his own. So Sainz's team is going to protest it and now Koolen... this is where it gets tasty:

quote:

Kees Koolen has launched an extraordinary tirade aimed at Carlos Sainz following the quad rider's alleged run-in with the Peugeot Sport driver on Saturday, with claims he'll make criminal charges after the event.
Koolen was left shaken by a close call with Sainz's buggy during the La Paz - Uyuni stage, the pair now bickering over whether or not there was genuine contact made in the wake of Sainz being handed a 10-minute penalty.

Sainz is adamant he narrowly missed an out-of-control Koolen, and says he's "disgusted" by the penalty given he feels he helped avoid a serious accident.

Koolen, however, says he was definitely hit by Sainz and that the 10-minute penalty isn't severe enough.

In fact, the Dutch businessman is now talking about making criminal charges over the incident.

"In my protest, and I don�t say a lot about my protest, when there is a serious penalty for this case, I would be happy," he said.

"If there�s not a serious penalty� Everybody knows I�m a businessman and have access to a lot of good lawyers, maybe the best lawyers in the world, better than these organisations have themselves.

"If you don't take serious penalties I will take my measurements when I come home again and I will file a criminal offence."

Koolen claims he was 20cm from death

Koolen didn't hold back when telling his side of the story, with sensational claims that he was 20 centimetres from being killed by Sainz's buggy.

"Normally you look around when you hear the sentinel [and] you have 10 or 20 seconds [to decide] what to do," he explained.

"I hear the sentinel, look around, and at the same moment I go flying in the air. I think I was doing maybe 20 kph, the Peugeot was doing top speed, maybe 120, 150, 180�

"It was unbelievable. I was in the mud and was very lucky in the end. He hit the quad. You can see on my quad that there was a lot of damage. He says he didn�t hit me.

"My origin is that I;m an mechanical engineer. The part that was hit and deformed, I will ask a 3D engineer to calculate it, but I think you need 1500 kilos, to deform something, maybe 2000 kilos.

"He said nothing happened, he didn't feel it.

"I will ask technical experts, I have the parts saved. I expected somebody to steal it this night so I can�t prove it anymore, but I have saved them and will give it to a calculating company, they will see what the force was."

"It was about this situation. I was there in a difficult situation and the car created a very dangerous situation. If the car would hit me 20 centimetres to the left, I would be dead.

"I think if I would be dead, it would have been a lot easier for Peugeot and Carlos because then I wouldn�t be able to talk anymore."

Koolen also reckons Sainz failed to stop and check if he was okay, and says there has been no apology from driver or team.

"I could have been dead and he didn�t even look around, did not stop, did not ask afterwards if I was okay," he said.

"Peugeot didn�t come to me. Everybody�s talking in the office behind me and I wasn�t asked about anything. I could have been dead and nobody cares. Because they have to protect a good rider and to protect each other. I have had no apologies, nothing.

"If we are racing and I hit you, at that moment we�re racing but afterwards we come to each other to shake hands, to talk about what happened, 'are you okay, can I help you?'

"Nothing of that. I think that is the worst thing. They consciously took very big risks, for danger for the life of people. They don�t help and don�t apologize. I can�t imagine that."

No communication with organisers

Koolen went on to allege that he was never contacted by the organisers to discuss the incident until the decision about the 10-minute penalty had been handed down.

"I think what is very strange and very stupid, nobody has asked me anything, only the press," he said.

"When it happened nobody came to ask me what happened. Not Peugeot, nor Carlos. Now I hear that there is a result from the jury, I was not asked about it, nobody asked me anything.

"I think the penalty should be very big, not because of Carlos but because of the situation. It should be an example for the motorbikes.

"Yesterday the riders on bikes have complained about the same people. The FIM has asked me to write a letter, because all the other riders were very afraid to file a complaint.

"Everybody knows that these are French organisations and there is a lot of rumours about French organisations that they help each other, they protect each other. I don�t believe in that, I think they are objective and correct people.

"I said to myself yesterday, if there is a serious penalty, I will keep my mouth shut and will not talk about anything anymore, but this is ridiculous.

"I think it's not about Carlos, I think it�s wrong to talk about that. It is about the situation. This is an example that the cars should care about safety. ASO, FIA, FIM always tell us that you can do what you want, you can do a dangerous sport but there is one rule, that�s safety first.

"If somebody is in danger, you help each other. And they didn�t do these things."

Ties to Overdrive 'nothing to do with this situation'

Koolen also brushed off suggestions he had business ties with the Toyota Overdrive squad, saying that there is no direct involvement despite a link through a joint investment.

"I have something to do with Overdrive as an investor, but I don�t think it has anything to do with this situation. I think it�s very bad to mix that up," he said.

"I�m a professional investor and am involved in many companies. I invest in 100 companies, I�ve been investing in a company that has invested in Overdrive. I�m not a direct shareholder.

"Maybe I�m shareholder in 10 of these companies in the bivouac. I don�t know and I don�t care, because I�m a professional.

"I put my money in business cases and after that it�s up to the management, I don't work with the companies."

https://www.motorsport.com/dakar/news/koolen-threatens-criminal-offence-claim-over-sainz-clash-996203/

:staredog:

# ? Jan 16, 2018 20:30

wicka: Jun 28, 2007

�Sainz Jr�s dad�

# ? Jan 16, 2018 20:35

DoctorGonzo: Jul 25, 2016; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

the FIA loving sucks

# ? Jan 16, 2018 20:45

OhsH: Jan 12, 2008

dude should be thankful he didnt die in the motherfucking desert, which is something that will happen to somebody else during this race

# ? Jan 16, 2018 21:04

Wirth1000: May 12, 2010; #essereFerrari

Dude sounds like a silicon valley crazy gently caress

# ? Jan 16, 2018 21:09

F1DriverQuidenBerg: Jan 19, 2014

lol

# ? Jan 16, 2018 21:17

F1DriverQuidenBerg: Jan 19, 2014

The story starts at a peace section (I call these the boring sections) with some rich old lady throwing a party at her house. This lady is basically a oval office and micromanages all her guests, she's like the guy in Seinfeld who had a job for everyone at his party. This mid 20s bastard child called Pierre shows up who's come back from France and starts stirring up poo poo at the party by saying that Napoleon is both cool and good. The old lady gets hella pissed off at this but I don't remember her name so I don't think this has any further bearing at the story. There's some rich old scumbag at the party called vasiline or something that is trying to marry off his children and some old lady trying to get a decent army position for her mentally challenged son. She talks to somebody who I think is a character called Andrew but it doesn't make sense at that point of the story so it's actually probably somebody else but they get the position.

I don't think anything happens at this party but Pierre and an other dude name Dolokov or Doubtsky or something go to this sweet after party. They play some bizarre form of Russian Roulette that involves drinking a whole bottle of vodka while hanging out a third story window and then they wrestle a bear or chain a police man to him. I don't actually remember this part but it gets brought up later and described in a way where it definitely happened.

After this Pierre visits Andrew (They're apparently good friends), both think Napoleon is cool and good. Andrew hates his wife for some reason and wants to go off to war to meet Napoleon. Pierre doesn't, I think cause he's a fat baby and a bastard child so he'd be cannon fodder. Andrew's wife is pregnant so he basically wants to gently caress off to avoid the fallout from having a newborn so that's pretty understandable.

# ? Jan 16, 2018 21:24

OhsH: Jan 12, 2008

War and Peace? more like bore and sheesh.

# ? Jan 16, 2018 21:26

Feels Villeneuve: Oct 7, 2007; Setter is Better.

I didn't read that long rear end post but did Carlos Sainz Jr attempt to murder a rich rear end in a top hat because that's cool

# ? Jan 16, 2018 21:38

Human Grand Prix: Jan 24, 2013; by FactsAreUseless

Sainz Sr., actually.

# ? Jan 16, 2018 21:49

Gigi Galli: Sep 19, 2003; and then the car turned in to fire

Feels Villeneuve posted:

I didn't read that long rear end post but did Carlos Sainz Jr attempt to murder a rich rear end in a top hat because that's cool

He can, and should, do better. He could definitely kill that guy in the next stage imo.

e: yeah Old Man Sainz not Jr.

# ? Jan 16, 2018 21:49

Feels Villeneuve: Oct 7, 2007; Setter is Better.

IIRC the Dakar is basically Death Race and there are no rules so well done Carlos

# ? Jan 16, 2018 21:51

dentist toy box: Oct 9, 2012; There's a haint in the foothills of NC; the haint of the #3 chevy. The rich have formed a holy alliance to exorcise it but they'll never fucking catch him.

Imagine being such a pussy you file criminal charges as the result of a motor race

# ? Jan 16, 2018 21:52

wicka: Jun 28, 2007

dentist toy box posted:

Imagine being such a pussy you file criminal charges as the result of a motor race

I am absolutely that much of a pussy. No doubt whatsoever.

# ? Jan 16, 2018 21:59

F1DriverQuidenBerg: Jan 19, 2014

wicka posted:

I am absolutely that much of a pussy. No doubt whatsoever.

Maybe don't do the most dangerous and coolest rally race in that case.

# ? Jan 16, 2018 22:01

ilmucche: Mar 16, 2016; What did you say the strategy was?

I like that posters are probated and i don't know why, but 1500quid is giving a 15 Canadian cent review of war and peace and all is cool.

Also, get the gently caress out of the way, rally is always get out of the way behind you. Dakar is dangerous and people die, ride safely.

# ? Jan 16, 2018 22:22

Carth Dookie: Jan 28, 2013

I think the lesson Sainz Sr learned is that if he'd gone back and spent an extra 30 seconds beating the guy to death with a wrench to finish him off, the complaint couldn't have been made and he could have been spared the 10 minute time penalty.

# ? Jan 16, 2018 22:45

Ostentatious: Sep 29, 2010

bring back narain karthikeyan

# ? Jan 16, 2018 22:53

Tsaedje: May 11, 2007; BRAWNY BUTTONS 4 LYFE

I like that his defense boils down to 'if I'd actually hit him he'd be loving dead'

# ? Jan 16, 2018 22:55

poty: Jun 21, 2008; 虹はどこで終わるのですか？あなたの魂の中で、または地平線で?

1500quidporsche posted:

The story starts at a peace section (I call these the boring sections) with some rich old lady throwing a party at her house. This lady is basically a oval office and micromanages all her guests, she's like the guy in Seinfeld who had a job for everyone at his party. This mid 20s bastard child called Pierre shows up who's come back from France and starts stirring up poo poo at the party by saying that Napoleon is both cool and good. The old lady gets hella pissed off at this but I don't remember her name so I don't think this has any further bearing at the story. There's some rich old scumbag at the party called vasiline or something that is trying to marry off his children and some old lady trying to get a decent army position for her mentally challenged son. She talks to somebody who I think is a character called Andrew but it doesn't make sense at that point of the story so it's actually probably somebody else but they get the position.

I don't think anything happens at this party but Pierre and an other dude name Dolokov or Doubtsky or something go to this sweet after party. They play some bizarre form of Russian Roulette that involves drinking a whole bottle of vodka while hanging out a third story window and then they wrestle a bear or chain a police man to him. I don't actually remember this part but it gets brought up later and described in a way where it definitely happened.

After this Pierre visits Andrew (They're apparently good friends), both think Napoleon is cool and good. Andrew hates his wife for some reason and wants to go off to war to meet Napoleon. Pierre doesn't, I think cause he's a fat baby and a bastard child so he'd be cannon fodder. Andrew's wife is pregnant so he basically wants to gently caress off to avoid the fallout from having a newborn so that's pretty understandable.

Wow, this post really feels like I'm reading War and Peace, in that my mind drifts away three words into it

# ? Jan 16, 2018 23:05

wicka: Jun 28, 2007

1500quidporsche posted:

Maybe don't do the most dangerous and coolest rally race in that case.

I won�t!

# ? Jan 16, 2018 23:22

Human Grand Prix: Jan 24, 2013; by FactsAreUseless

Ostentatious posted:

bring back narain karthikeyan

He�s found a Super Formula ride.

# ? Jan 16, 2018 23:25

Rev. Dr. Moses P. Lester: Oct 3, 2000

I think an average of 2 competitors die a year in Dakar? Similar to IoM. But that doesn't count all the locals run over by the support trucks in the liaison stages. I think on average less than half the people who enter the race finish the race too.

# ? Jan 16, 2018 23:27

harperdc: Jul 24, 2007

ilmucche posted:

I like that posters are probated and i don't know why, but 1500quid is giving a 15 Canadian cent review of war and peace and all is cool.

Williams driver lineup toxxes, if memory serves.

# ? Jan 16, 2018 23:28

iospace: Jan 19, 2038

harperdc posted:

Williams driver lineup toxxes, if memory serves.

Yup!

# ? Jan 16, 2018 23:31

Human Grand Prix: Jan 24, 2013; by FactsAreUseless

dentist toy box posted:

Imagine being such a pussy you file criminal charges as the result of a motor race

Some Japanese gentleman Group C driver did because of a mechanical failure.

# ? Jan 17, 2018 00:13

F1DriverQuidenBerg: Jan 19, 2014

Also didnt Haas try to sue for damages because some grate was improperly welded during a GP this and damaged their car?

# ? Jan 17, 2018 00:14

You Am I: May 20, 2001; Me @ your poasting

thank god all that garbage posting men have been probated.

time for some quality You Am I posting in this thread, to bring up the over all levels of quality here.

# ? Jan 17, 2018 00:47

Norns: Nov 21, 2011; Senior Shitposting Strategist

Jokes on you I'm still here

# ? Jan 17, 2018 00:49

wicka: Jun 28, 2007

Norns posted:

Jokes on you I'm still here

# ? Jan 17, 2018 01:02

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# ? May 31, 2024 09:11

Schlesische: Jul 4, 2012

Human Grand Prix posted:

Some Japanese gentleman Group C driver did because of a mechanical failure.

1500quidporsche posted:

Also didnt Haas try to sue for damages because some grate was improperly welded during a GP this and damaged their car?

These are both civil suits suing for damages. The Dutch gentleman is considering criminal charges. I'm calling him a gentleman because he should really be in Carrera Cup making an arse out of himself there fron what I've heard.

# ? Jan 17, 2018 01:12

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > 17-18 F1 Off-Season: <INSERT TEAM HERE> is bad, OP. Especially

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