BlankIsBeautiful posted:

And in the 70s (US) too. When my family was running through the rough, my Mom would get "Ice Milk" instead of "Ice Cream" because it was cheaper. Tasted pretty bad to me, though, clearly a lot more watery than the good stuff.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ice_milk

Pookah posted:

Never been in one of them, they don't exist over here I doubt I'd be a fan anyway; I have to cross the road when passing a Lush as it is.

steinrokkan posted:

Haifisch posted:

Pastry of the Year posted:

let mama feed you

Randaconda posted:

Iron Crowned posted:

Bath and Body Works owns, I spend way too much anytime I set foot in one

drrockso20 posted:

I like that brand but not their Mac & Cheese or Alfredo, cause those rarely ever cook right

BlankIsBeautiful posted:

And in the 70s (US) too. When my family was running through the rough, my Mom would get "Ice Milk" instead of "Ice Cream" because it was cheaper. Tasted pretty bad to me, though, clearly a lot more watery than the good stuff.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ice_milk

drrockso20 posted:

That needs to be illegal

The Glumslinger posted:

KataraniSword posted:

Yeah, the more "sauce" they put in, the worse it cooks. The sauce never defrosts no matter how much you break up the frozen block it starts in or try to mix it in with the rest, and then the noodles overcook and turn into actual plastic because there's no sauce and everything is horrible. The Mac+Cheese and Alfredo are like 50% Giant Chunk Of loving Ice by volume, so you will never get a proper cooking in a microwave, meaning you'd have to put it in the oven, which defeats the entire point of buying $0.99 frozen dinners (which is because you are too depressed to make ramen but too poor to afford hot pockets).

By contrast, their swedish meatballs and their pepper steak almost resemble actual food.

angerbeet posted:

Shake me ten times? Oh honey I'm already shook gurl

Lime Tonics posted:

corn bin broke.

Sandwich Anarchist posted:

Lol "I won't explode".

sweeperbravo posted:

i guess tide pod has a more compact ring to it than laundry detergent pod, though if we need to develop a brand-neutral form i vote for 'terge pod

LifeSunDeath posted:

You guys know the fastest way to get a tide pod into your system is anally, right?

Somfin posted:

AFP: butt chuggin' 'terge pods

Somfin posted:

AFP: butt chuggin' 'terge pods

Aunt Beth posted:

Also thanks to the apostrophes all I see is AFP: butt chugginterge pods

Somfin posted:

butt chuggin' 'terge pods

Sandwich Anarchist posted:

Pretty easy to get ladies to not eat tide pods.

Alot harder to deter gents though.

quote:

My GFs birthday is the beginning of November. We just moved in together last August and neither of us are the super domestic type. My GF asked for cooking classes as a gift and got them. They're classes intended for people without a lot of experience cooking and on a somewhat limited budget. Both of us could always make basic stuff pretty well like casserole, baked meats and veggies, chili, that kind of thing, but she especially wanted to have more knowledge about ingredients and techniques so that she could try some recipes of her own and get some ideas instead of using prepared things even in recipes like cans of soup and canned tomatoes.

She was, and still is, really excited.

But her enthusiasm FAR exceeds her skills​ and our relationship is basically over because of it.

The class gets a handout every week for reference. At the start it was things like food safety, basic kitchen utensils, and suggestions of some staple spices and things to always keep on hand. So I know they've gone over the really basic stuff.

However my GF can't seem to prepare anything that's fully cooked. I'd be here all night going over every example but once she made chicken fajitas and only the outer 1/16" of the chicken strips was cooked white. The insides were totally raw. I took one bite and was like "Babe we can't eat these, the chicken isn't cooked all the way." That was like the first time she'd really tried a recipe so we sort of laughed it off as beginner's mistake and moved on.

But from there it's been tacos with pink ground beef. Raw pork chops. Several instances of pink chicken. Her baked goods are still dough in the middle.

I put my foot down very quickly that I won't eat this undercooked food. It isn't safe. Now mealtimes are a huge stress because I'll get something or make something for myself and she takes it as an insult. She thinks "I know more than the instructor who said that overcooking RUINS EVERY DISH".

I'm sure he did say something like that. But he very, very likely meant that most people new to cooking can't always tell between done and overdone, and cook chicken until it's dry rather than done but juicy. Stuff like that.

I've tried to tell her that her undercooked food is dangerous and that's why I won't eat it. Every time I do she says something like the above, or that I don't believe in her, I'm "crazymaking" (da fuq? pink chicken is not done), and once she dropped "emotionally abusive".

What's worse is she's brought this food to events with our families and taken it to her work for potlucks. And aside from telling her it's not safe, like..... what am I supposed to do? Call her work ahead of time and tell them not to eat any of the baked ziti because the sausage is raw?

Our families have tried to be honest but diplomatic. Her mom tried to tell her that she wasn't used to our oven and how to check when banana bread was really done. She said that banana bread is SUPPOSED to be moist, she's just never had it made RIGHT.

It was basically dough.

My family tells her not to bring anything because it'll "just go to waste because there aren't many of us". She still insists and brings something raw.

It's embarrassing. And she will NOT listen.

When she does prepare something properly it's flavored/spiced so strangely it doesn't even make sense. She made cinnamon brownies over Xmas. Sounds good right? And they actually weren't raw! But she wanted to be "more creative" so she "substituted" the cinnamon with powdered lemon peel. Can't make this poo poo up guys. Lemon brownies. She said that "boring" recipes just don't have FLAVOR!!!! and that people are afraid to experiment. Everything has to have FLAVOR!!!! which usually means a combination that could never work on any planet, or so much of one spice or seasoning it overpowers everything else. She put 4 entire bulbs of garlic in a small pot of chicken​ soup. Not cloves. Bulbs. Because chicken soup usually doesn't have enough FLAVOR!!!!!

It was basically chicken in garlic broth. She told me that "taste is subjective".

I wish I were a troll or exaggerating this. But it really is this way. She's so smart and motivated and that was qualities that drew me to her. I don't understand how she can think every chicken dish she's ever had in her whole life ever was made wrong and overcooked. Yet, here we are.

It came to a head 2 nights ago when she warmed up leftovers from Olive Garden. The meatballs were raw. And there was so much basil in the sauce it was practically green. I am not proud to say I yelled at her. She tried to trick me into eating dangerous food I told her I would not eat. She went through the same defenses again and then said she had hoped I would "appreciate her cooking if I came in without biases because it means so much to her".

I'm not prejudice against raw meatballs, I promise. I just don't want E. coli.

Idk what to do anymore. I just really don't. Help me Reddit. I love her but her cooking skills aren't advancing at all, she won't listen, and she's going to make someone sick. This can't be the rest of my life. But then again I sound like a misogynistic rear end in a top hat if I leave a woman because "she couldn't cook".

tl;dr GF thinks she's a professional chef but all her dishes are raw or inedible. Won't listen to reason or feedback. I'm at a loss.

quote:

It was basically chicken in garlic broth.