Trump IV: THE NEEDLE BESTOWS IT'S GLORY UPON OUR UNWORTHY VESSELS OF FLESH

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > Trump IV: THE NEEDLE BESTOWS IT'S GLORY UPON OUR UNWORTHY VESSELS OF FLESH

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ded redd: Aug 1, 2010; by Fluffdaddy

marshmonkey posted:

404

ICE Spokesman Quits and Accuses Top Officials of Repeatedly Lying

quote:

A spokesman for the Immigration and Customs Enforcement agency has resigned over what he claims are lies being told by top officials about the number of undocumented people who evaded arrest after the mayor of Oakland warned the immigrant community in of upcoming raids.

James Schwab, who was the spokesman for ICE in San Francisco, told The San Francisco Chronicle and CNN on Monday night that he decided to resign after officials including ICE director Thomas Homan and Attorney General Jeff Sessions claimed that as many as 800 �wanted aliens� in California avoided arrest because of Oakland Mayor Libby Schaaf. Schwab told the agency he wanted to correct the number and was instead told to �deflect� questions from the press, he said.

�I quit because I didn�t want to perpetuate misleading facts,� Schwab, who worked for the agency since 2015, told the paper. �I asked them to change the information. I told them that the information was wrong, they asked me to deflect, and I didn�t agree with that. Then I took some time and I quit.�

After ICE�s Northern California raid�which began Feb. 25 and was dubbed Keep Safe�the agency said in a statement that it had arrested 232 undocumented people. Those raids were widely read as a direct challenge to California�s sanctuary laws which prevent local cooperation with federal immigration authorities.

Homan then said in a statement that �864 criminal aliens and public safety threats remain at large in the community, and I have to believe that some of them were able to elude us thanks to the mayor�s irresponsible decision.�

In his speech last week in Sacramento announcing the Justice Department is suing the state of California over its sanctuary cities, Sessions seemed to borrow from Homan, saying there were now �800 wanted criminals that ICE will now have to pursue with more difficulty in more dangerous situations, all because of one mayor�s irresponsible action.�

And Trump, for his part, called Schaaf a �disgrace� during a weekend campaign rally in Pennsylvania, saying the raids were meant to round up �close to 1,000 people� but instead �took in a fraction of that.�

While the former ICE spokesman called the mayor�s actions �misguided� in an interview with CNN, he said the agency was still not telling the truth.

�Personally I think her actions were misguided and not responsible. I think she could have had other options. But to blame her for 800 dangerous people out there is just false,� he said. �It�s a false statement because we never pick up 100% of our targets. And to say they�re a type of dangerous criminal is also misleading.�

The Oakland mayor praised Schwab�s actions in a statement to the Washington Post, commending him �for speaking the truth while under intense pressure to lie.�

In a statement to Splinter, ICE said:

Even one criminal alien on the street can put public safety at risk and as Director Homan stated, while we can�t put a number on how many targets avoided arrest due to the mayor�s warning, it clearly had an impact. While we disagree with Mr. Schwab on this issue, we appreciate his service and wish him well.

UPDATE, 12:39 PM ET: In emails to Splinter, a spokeswoman for the Justice Department pointed to Sessions� earlier comments, saying the number of people Sessions claimed avoided arrest because of Schaaf referred to �wanted aliens,� not necessarily criminals. She also accused Schwab, the former ICE spokesman, of �contradicting himself.�

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:24

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# ? Jun 11, 2024 04:14

Invalid Validation: Jan 13, 2008

I�m glad Trump is running the government like a business. It�ll be nice to be bankrupt by the end of the year and won�t have to pay those pesky credit card bills we�ve been accumulating.

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:24

Mr Ice Cream Glove: Apr 22, 2007

https://twitter.com/Patrici15767099/status/973605989193728000?s=20

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:26

goethe.cx: Apr 23, 2014

Ague Proof posted:

Noli me tangerine.

lol

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:26

mistaya: Oct 18, 2006; Cat of Wealth and Taste

Too much stuff is happening, it's a loving Tuesday, ugh, I feel drunk.

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:26

Guest2553: Aug 3, 2012

Invalid Validation posted:

I�m glad Trump is running the government like a business. It�ll be nice to be bankrupt by the end of the year and won�t have to pay those pesky credit card bills we�ve been accumulating.

Maybe we can be bought out and merge with a more responsible country too.

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:26

Crow Jane: Oct 18, 2012; nothin' wrong with a lady drinkin' alone in her room

Invalid Validation posted:

I�m glad Trump is running the government like a business. It�ll be nice to be bankrupt by the end of the year and won�t have to pay those pesky credit card bills we�ve been accumulating.

I bet the Going Out of Business sale will be great tho. I'm totally picking up some slashed-price marble busts.

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:27

Chilichimp: Oct 24, 2006; TIE Adv xWampa

It wamp, and it stomp; Grimey Drawer

evilweasel posted:

the gently caress do they think they're texting nobles or something

not your town, your homes, whatever, your territory

Russian word for home translates into territory, probably.

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:27

boner confessor: Apr 25, 2013; by R. Guyovich

Drone posted:

democrats bringing illegals,rapists,worst people into your oblast

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:27

DACK FAYDEN: Feb 25, 2013; Bear Witness

Mr Ice Cream Glove posted:

https://twitter.com/Patrici15767099/status/973605989193728000?s=20

the beautiful city of SAN DEIGO

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:28

Potato Salad: Oct 23, 2014; nobody cares

Guest2553 posted:

Maybe we can be bought out and merge with a more responsible country too.

I mean, that's essentially what our reaction to Chinese industrial and trade interest in the Pacific has been under Trump: lie down, roll over, and die.

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:29

The Sean: Apr 17, 2005; Can't post for 4 days!

Guest2553 posted:

Maybe we can be bought out and merge with a more responsible country too.

For some states they'll get picked up by a respectable country, but the original purchase will be through a vulture capitalist group and the states will be sold off piecemeal.

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:29

Chilichimp: Oct 24, 2006; TIE Adv xWampa

It wamp, and it stomp; Grimey Drawer

marshmonkey posted:

https://twitter.com/nbcwashington/status/973575036253757440

the only way to stop a bad guy misfiring a gun is a good guy misfiring a gun

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:29

Mr Ice Cream Glove: Apr 22, 2007

singing anthem...not creepy

https://twitter.com/ColumbiaBugle/status/973608357171937280?s=20

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:30

Bhaal: Jul 13, 2001; I ain't going down alone; Dr. Infant, MD

I think at this point we just form some tankie org and start writing opinion blogs that say we've just concluded research that proves the wall could be fully paid for with a gun ban and medicare for all.

Then use a botnet on twitter to bombard him with links to the article until he gives it a shot.

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:30

evilweasel: Aug 24, 2002

I was wrong, the UK is not thinking of invoking Article 5 of Nato since that applies only to an "armed attack" not a "use of force"

https://twitter.com/pwnallthethings/status/973611351821180928

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:30

Mahoning: Feb 3, 2007

marshmonkey posted:

https://twitter.com/nbcwashington/status/973575036253757440

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zw-jTCNZSmY&t=32s

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:30

davebo: Nov 15, 2006; Parallel lines do meet, but they do it incognito; College Slice

Mozi posted:

Obviously we need to arm the schools directly with ceiling-mounted AI robotic turrets.

Like the hotel A.I. in Altered Carbon? I'm down for that.

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:30

skylined!: Apr 6, 2012; THE DEM DEFENDER HAS LOGGED ON

evilweasel posted:

the gently caress do they think they're texting nobles or something

not your town, your homes, whatever, your territory

russian translator strikes again

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:30

redneck nazgul: Apr 25, 2013

The Sean posted:

For some states they'll get picked up by a respectable country, but the original purchase will be through a vulture capitalist group and the states will be sold off piecemeal.

looking forward to laughing at bainsylvania� and baintucky�

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:31

Lord Hydronium: Sep 25, 2007; Non, je ne regrette rien

Ague Proof posted:

NYTimes say they're retiring the needle tonight, and will be using Trump's dick instead.

Weird, you'd think they'd want to use something that can move.

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:31

evilweasel: Aug 24, 2002

Bhaal posted:

I think at this point we just form some tankie org and start writing opinion blogs that say we've just concluded research that proves the wall could be fully paid for with a gun ban and medicare for all.

Then use a botnet on twitter to bombard him with links to the article until he gives it a shot.

trump can't read

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:31

Mr Ice Cream Glove: Apr 22, 2007

best israel catchphrase

https://twitter.com/consmover/status/973605391463464960?s=20

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:32

Ague Proof: Jun 5, 2014; they told me
I was everything

ThePersistence is hyping 3 races today and PA is third in his list. The first two are small state legislature elections and ridiculously Republican (technically all 3 are.)

So that's going to be their excuse if Lamb wins - 2-1 wins! They're going to blame it on Rexit and Stormy Daniels too.

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:34

Crow Jane: Oct 18, 2012; nothin' wrong with a lady drinkin' alone in her room

Ague Proof posted:

ThePersistence is hyping 3 races today and PA is third in his list. The first two are small state legislature elections and ridiculously Republican (technically all 3 are.)

So that's going to be their excuse if Lamb wins. They're going to blame it on Rexit and Stormy Daniels too.

Nah, they'll say he wasn't Trumpy enough

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:35

Bhaal: Jul 13, 2001; I ain't going down alone; Dr. Infant, MD

evilweasel posted:

trump can't read

All we need is the headline and I think he's semi-literate enough for it if we choose our words carefully.

The article body itself can literally be "lorem ipsum"

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:35

Chilichimp: Oct 24, 2006; TIE Adv xWampa

It wamp, and it stomp; Grimey Drawer

Ague Proof posted:

ThePersistence is hyping 3 races today and PA is third in his list. The first two are small state legislature elections and ridiculously Republican (technically all 3 are.)

So that's going to be their excuse if Lamb wins. They're going to blame it on Rexit and Stormy Daniels too.

illegal voters, you already knew that, though.

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:35

Ague Proof: Jun 5, 2014; they told me
I was everything

Crow Jane posted:

Nah, they'll say he wasn't Trumpy enough

Trump cannot fail, he can only be failed.

Stormy heard this many times.

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:35

Shimrra Jamaane: Aug 10, 2007; Obscure to all except those well-versed in Yuuzhan Vong lore.

Mr Ice Cream Glove posted:

best israel catchphrase

https://twitter.com/consmover/status/973605391463464960?s=20

Wow, a whole 20 people turned out.

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:35

Push El Burrito: May 9, 2006; Soiled Meat

Mr Ice Cream Glove posted:

https://twitter.com/Patrici15767099/status/973605989193728000?s=20

The giant ASSIMILATE sign.

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:36

prom candy: Dec 16, 2005; Only I may dance

marshmonkey posted:

https://twitter.com/nbcwashington/status/973575036253757440

desk pop

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:36

Rampant Dwickery: Nov 12, 2011; Comfy and cozy.

davebo posted:

Like the hotel A.I. in Altered Carbon? I'm down for that.

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:36

Crow Jane: Oct 18, 2012; nothin' wrong with a lady drinkin' alone in her room

Ague Proof posted:

Trump cannot fail, he can only be failed.

Stormy heard this many times.

That's pretty articulate for someone with a ball gag in their mouth, tbh

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:36

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

Bhaal posted:

All we need is the headline and I think he's semi-literate enough for it if we choose our words carefully.

The article body itself can literally be "lorem ipsum"

You need to get it on Fox and Friends.

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:36

aware of dog: Nov 14, 2016

https://twitter.com/zekejmiller/status/973613042989756416?s=21

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:37

PhazonLink: Jul 17, 2010

Shifty Pony posted:

Just LOL forever if the evangelical voting block becomes almost directly responsible for the widespread acceptance of the femdom kink.

Every once in a while pornhub and several search engines release popular porn searches by state and it's always the fundie areas that are the most gay or incestuous.

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:37

Mr Ice Cream Glove: Apr 22, 2007

If Trump loses in 2020, he will not concede

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:38

Shimrra Jamaane: Aug 10, 2007; Obscure to all except those well-versed in Yuuzhan Vong lore.

https://twitter.com/saksappeal/status/973610162345926656?s=20

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:38

mobby_6kl: Aug 9, 2009; by Fluffdaddy

aware of dog posted:

https://twitter.com/zekejmiller/status/973613042989756416?s=21

Oh poo poo that's like 20 minutes isn't it. Why is this even possible if he was fired already?

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:39

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# ? Jun 11, 2024 04:14

Crow Jane: Oct 18, 2012; nothin' wrong with a lady drinkin' alone in her room

Mr Ice Cream Glove posted:

If Trump loses in 2020, he will not concede

He'll flop screaming onto the Oval Office floor like a toddler throwing a tantrum in the toy aisle

# ? Mar 13, 2018 18:39

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > Trump IV: THE NEEDLE BESTOWS IT'S GLORY UPON OUR UNWORTHY VESSELS OF FLESH

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