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Oh gently caress it's comming down to Phoebe VS Qurry United VS BIG SMOKE C'mon Big Smoke and Tim Qurry (COMRADE Variant, he will give us fully automated gay space communism; Qurry Prime is poo poo and Qurry FRANKENFURTER Variant will give us weaker NON-communist gay space)
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Apr 16, 2018 08:05
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| # ? Jun 10, 2024 16:00 |
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 MOTHERFUCKER https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lIl9FBcTodQ&t=60s
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Apr 16, 2018 15:50
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I was rooting for Dantel there. Big Smoke's our only hope now.
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Apr 16, 2018 16:04
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Anyone I root for tends to get cursed into losing. If that's the case, go Q.
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Apr 16, 2018 16:27
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I Said No posted:Anyone I root for tends to get cursed into losing. If that's the case, go Q. Jigsaw and Dantel can finally play their game in the void.
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Apr 16, 2018 16:54
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 I'm...alone?------------------------------------  SHIIIIIIT! The resistance is toast and there's still three mother#$%^&$ QURRYS runnin' around....gently caress! #$%^------------------------------------  Rest up boys, tomorrow we set out to eliminate the last two threats to our regime. I don't expect it to be much of a fight. A little girl and a frightened overweight has-been gangster...could this be any easier? You guys should really try this delicious fruit!
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Apr 17, 2018 06:49
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The arena is re-pressurized and it is now safe to move around again...go out and kill, fellow Qurrys! I'll set up a temporary base of operations...we can't let ourselves get overconfident!  Goddamn it...all the water got sucked out into space! Well well well...if it isn't Ms. PHOEBE BUFFET! Aren't you just the CUTEST THING? Always singing your IRRITATING SONGS and acting like such a DUMB BLONDE. Leave me alone, Qurry! All my friends are gone...haven't you done enough? Yes...they're all dead! You're such a failure! So WEAK! Don't call me weak! You have no idea what I've been through, what I've lived through! You don't know me! Ouch! Ooof...STOP! STOP HITTING ME WITH THAT TREE BRANCH! OOF! Arg... Shut up! Shut up! I should kill you! Ah, but you can't! Can you? You're too..."good." You stupid hippie wannabe, grow a pair and finish me off! I...won't stoop to your level! I can't! Of course you can't. You've fought in two hunger games now and yet you've never killed anyone. I killed the Postal Dude! Oh, right! The child molester you shoved into a safe. Hardly a hands on approach. You don't have the stomach to beat me to death with a stick. I'm done with this conversation. I hope you fall off a bridge. How tough can this gangster be? I'll find him and I'll-
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Apr 17, 2018 07:56
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gently caress no Comrade Qurry. It's all up to you Smoke and Frankenqurry
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Apr 17, 2018 08:10
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Man, look at that...the universe bein' born n' poo poo. What I wouldn't give for a hotdog... Brrrrrrr....I think the arena might be malfunctioning still...it's getting very cold... Really? You couldn't take down Phoebe? You do realize that the whole "fool's luck" thing doesn't matter anymore, right? It was not my finest moment, but I will try again... No, I want you to take out the gangster. I'll handle her. ------------------------------------ Foolish fat man, wheeeeeeere arrrre yooooooou? I have a loooooovely all beef hotdog for you....it's in my paaaaaaaants.... Look at dat pansy foo', running around yelling like that! Does he think I'm just gonna go out and fight him? I ain't stupid. He did leave behind some nice supplies and stuff. drat yo, look it this! Ninja knives and poo poo! Imma take these.  Phoebe Buffet, at last I have found you. It is time to end this. The resistance will die with you. Go away! I want nothing to do with you...everyone is dead! First you kidnapped me and all my friends...dropped us into the Costco from hell. They're all dead now. Then my new friends... Come to me. I promise you a swift and mostly painless death. No! I'll never give up! It's like I was telling the Llama earlier...no matter how bad it is...I have to keep going. Do you really think you can defeat me? Me!? I, whose breath shatters worlds, whose back scrapes the sky, whose footsteps cause all reality to quake!? Versus little you? None of your more powerful allies could defeat me, what makes you think you can!? Hey, demon breath, I've seen Buffy the Vampire Slayer! I know how to kill someone like you! And I'm not afraid to do it!
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Apr 17, 2018 08:21
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Hee hee, you done good girl! Glad you took down big ugly 'cause I sure as hell didn't wanna tangle with that one. Glad you're so dazed from the fight too, cause now I'm gonna help myself to your little pile of supplies and burn the rest...then I'm gonna shank you with my new friend mister ninja knife... Oh my...all alone...all the better...without Prime to boss me around the universe I build will be much, much sexier...hey, there's more of that savory, scrumptious fruit up here...yum... Ok blondie, nothing personal but I gotta be the last one standing... Really, Smoke? You're going to stab her in her sleep? Afraid to face a woman in a fair fight? How manly of you....you've been slinking around the arena like a coward this whole game letting others do the work for you, playing one side off the other but all you really care about is yourself. You're truly slime! There will be no (gurgle) place for you and those like you in my (cough) new universe! Huh!? What's going...oh boy poo poo man, you woke her up! Why you gotta make this so hard? Oh, I'm still going to (tttthbttt) kill you both...but I want to look you in the eye when I do it. Hurk... Dude you don't look so good. My universe will (gurgle) (splat) AAAH (collapse) Oh poo poo is he...poo poo! Gross! ACK! gently caress MAN! poo poo! Well this is a terrible thing to wake up to. As disgusting as that was, you know what I gotta do now, blondie... Come on, Big Smoke! We don't have to fight! I'm sure if we work together we can find a way out of this! I ain't no team player, girlie. You and I both know this won't end until one of us is dead, and that ain't gonna be me. Besides, the winner of this game's gonna be a god! Me, BIG SMOKE! I'm gonna have the power! P...Please, you just watched a man poop himself to death! We have to stop these games...for good! We can't fight! Stop them? STOP THEM!? I'M GONNA RUN 'EM, BABY!(Big Smoke charges at Phoebe with the Sais drawn) TO BE CONCLUDED! (sorry, couldn't resist one last cliffhanger!)
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Apr 17, 2018 08:49
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Frank loved the fruit, but it didn’t love him back.
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Apr 17, 2018 09:36
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Jesus I actually jinxed it on purpose successfully. Uh... go Phoebe?
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Apr 17, 2018 14:15
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I'm not sure what this is turning into but I am glad it is ending this way.
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Apr 17, 2018 16:05
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Fight, Pheebs! For everlasting peace!
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Apr 17, 2018 23:48
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 Big Smoke, why!? Why!? (wheezing) I got caught up in the money...(cough) the power...ughhh. I don't give a poo poo. Oh gently caress, man...(cough) Why didn't you just quit!? It didn't have to end like this... I had no choice...I had to do it...I just see the opportunity! (cough) Oh...when I'm gone, everyone gonna remember my name! Big Smoke! Ohh...ugh... What...happens now?TIME: TWO DAYS LATER. PLACE: ABANDONED COMMENTARY BOOTH Brrr...it's getting so cold out there...no food...no water...this is one of the last places that hasn't fallen into the void. I don't know how much longer it'll even be here...Hello! Hello, anyone in here? Oh, at last! Sweet heavens, you did it Phoebe! Eeek! Who are you? And why are you wearing the Doctor's clothes?! I'm the Doctor! Kind of...no time to explain, just trust me, ok? After you defeated Big Smoke whatever force was inhibiting my regeneration lifted and I've been trying to figure this place out ever since. I guess I'll just have to trust you...it isn't any weirder than anything else that's happened recently...have you figured anything out? Well, you're the champion, for whatever it's worth! And now the arena is in shutdown mode...I don't think it was designed to work under these conditions, especially with no one at the controls...which are, sadly, unresponsive to me. You mean these? (panel comes to life) What have we here? Of course...this is the commentary booth, and, as such, the controls are locked out to anyone that isn't a champion! Phoebe, try this one! Brilliant, it was able to retrieve the TARDIS from orbit! We have a way home now! From what I gather...these controls are wired to effect reality in powerful ways....had the wrong person got a hold of them, who knows what kind of damage they could have done to the universe! Quickly, we must destroy them and get out of here! If my hypothesis is correct, by blowing this place up here, at the beginning of all things, we'll be wiping the Hunger Games from existence....our friends, and the hundreds of others who perished, will be restored, as if the games never happened! Only we will retain any memory of these terrible events... But...there's so much good we could do with this power! There's so much evil in the universe...couldn't we use this machine to improve it? Phoebe, that's a dangerous path we can't go down...once we start tampering with reality like that, we'd be no better than Tim Qurry! Well...ok...but before we go, there is one thing I'd like to change...(Phoebe inputs her commands, and rigs the arena to self destruct) It's done. Let's go. Hold on tight, it's gonna be a bumpy ride! Geronimo! (the arena explodes along with the Big Bang, erasing the hunger games from history and restoring all tributes to the very moment they were taken, with no memory of the events they experienced....) PLACE: Q CONTINUUM  Tim Qurry, your charges are as follows...two counts of attempted murder of a Q, unlawful usurpation of a Q experiment...attempted destruction of all reality...and theft of provisions from the communal refrigerator. How do you plead? Guilty, by reason of insanity. If you're referring to your split personality, the issue has been taken into account. Your sentence will be...appropriate. As for the games, they are to be suspended...indefinitely.TIME: 1999. PLACE: CENTRAL PERK COFFEE SHOP, NEW YORK CITY And then the bad pervert man in sunglasses was all up my face, so I shoved him into this big safe! I guess he died in there. ...the safe inside the Costco death arena... Right!  ...and you're saying I got trampled to death on day one? Yeah, Joey...sorry, you didn't get to do much... This is the dumbest thing I've ever heard. I dunno, I liked the part where the big red talking echidna strangled Janice... See, Ross, that kind of attitude is why Chandler, a duck, a really ugly naked guy, a man with a chainsaw for an arm, Mickey Mouse, and Santa Claus all worked together to kill you..... Pheebs, we talked about this...are you experimenting with drugs again? No no, Rachel! Honest! This was all real! And this is the normal part of the story! I haven't got to the part where after you all died, I escaped, and THEN joined a resistance group led by mice and we eventually went into space and fought demons!! I'm sure we all can't wait to hear about that... Speak for yourself Monica, I'm into this...this is better than television! So I never got resurrected...or anything? Sorry guys but I have to go...I'm meeting my mother for lunch and I don't want to be late.TIME: 1989. PLACE: THE HOME OF TIM CURRY  Congratulations Mr. Curry! You knocked that audition out of the park! You've landed the role of Pennywise in the upcoming production of IT! The producers said it was like you were born for the part... Wonderful! You know, it's funny...but I keep feeling like I've played these roles before...THE END
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Apr 18, 2018 07:22
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EPILOGUE TIME:UNKNOWN. PLACE, THE TECHNODROME, BETWEEN DIMENSIONS.   This strange craft should be exiting dimensional travel soon, sir...and if my readings are correct, the reality we were in has been purged of the hunger games... Excellent. How careless of that "Shredder" fellow to leave this delightful machine unattended as he went off to battle...that group never noticed our infiltration of their ranks... Travel complete. They're already hailing us...they were waiting. Let them in.(ROBERT MUELLER, and SHADOW THE HEDGEHOG board the Technodrome...they are surrounded by armed guards wearing Subway uniforms...the Foot Clan parts and allows them to approach the control room...Mueller carries a strange box, and Shadow carries a slice of bread) Do you have it? We do... but first, we need to discuss terms... ...--------------------------------------------- And that's a wrap. I hope you all enjoyed, trying to make a coherent narrative around the RNG induced madness of the games was a fun challenge and while I'm not sure I always succeeded, it was still a blast to write. I wanted to conclude the resistance story while still leaving it open ended enough for the games to continue. I think I Said No has hosting dibs now if they still want it...I'm all too happy to retire now, ha ha. Thanks for putting up with the silliness! Polly Toodle fucked around with this message at 07:55 on Apr 18, 2018 |
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Apr 18, 2018 07:47
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That was awesome. Genuinely tense. Very well written. Thanks for all your hard work. In the end we were saved by the most humble of nature's creatures - the Pheobesaurus Rex.
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Apr 18, 2018 10:29
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 You did great. This was a hell of a ride.
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Apr 18, 2018 12:51
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I've got too much poo poo going on to run one right now. Still got a special game planned but it requires 24 seasons to be completed first.
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Apr 18, 2018 15:12
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If anybody's still interested, I can run a couple rounds.
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Apr 18, 2018 19:19
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I’m always up for another game.
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Apr 18, 2018 21:06
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Sounds good to me. Serge to run the next one? Fresh new tributes for a fresh new set of games.  Dana Scully  This inanimate carbon rod! and as a spare...  Skull Cow.
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Apr 18, 2018 22:09
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In light of Reaper being a hilarious loser some seasons back, i'm sending in Talon to gently caress everything up. #1: Doomfist  #2: Sombra  #3: Moira 
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Apr 18, 2018 22:44
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I nominate 3 people who can deal with being in a crisis! Joel Robinson  Mike Nelson  Jonah Heston 
Codependent Poster fucked around with this message at 23:04 on Apr 18, 2018 |
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Apr 18, 2018 23:01
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 Bilbo Baggins  Frodo Baggins  Gollum
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Apr 19, 2018 00:49
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I nominate... Leonardo da Vinci  Leonardo DiCaprio  and... Leonidas 
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Apr 19, 2018 00:54
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As usual I can't boost pictures at work but I'll still nominate: Jerry Seinfeld Jerry Springer Jerry Smith
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Apr 19, 2018 02:08
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Gridlocked posted:As usual I can't boost pictures at work but I'll still nominate:   
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Apr 19, 2018 06:07
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Thanks! 
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Apr 19, 2018 07:40
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A state executioner. David Callan  An Equalizer Robert McCall  A murderous reptile Scarran 
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Apr 19, 2018 20:06
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I'll submit... A Silver Mexican Baby  Evil Bird  Holy Bird 
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Apr 20, 2018 01:15
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24 so far! I'll run a game with 36 tributes.
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Apr 20, 2018 01:52
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In honor of previous SA battle royales, I'd like to nominate The Snapture  Tapogres  and Croctopus 
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Apr 20, 2018 02:30
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Miles, that was one hell of a ride. I don't know if you were familiar with the tributes beforehand, or simply did your homework, but it was fun to see everyone's quirks figure in to the narrative segments. And Phoebe got a happy ending for being the final winner! Thanks for that incredible stretch of games-mastering. For the next round, I nominate: Vadinho  Dablone  Jonathan Cooper III 
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Apr 20, 2018 03:45
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Thanks for the compliments everyone! It did take a little homework as I wasn't familiar with everyone at first (I'm still not sure who Mike McDonald is and google brings up multiple people with that name so lol he was as generic as I could make him.) I'm looking forward to seeing where Serge takes us next! In honor of Phoebe's triumph over Qurry Prime: Buffy the Vampire Slayer  and to accompany her: Rupert Giles  as well as someone completely unrelated: Father Murphy (from the Little House on the Prairie ripoff staring Merlin Olsen) 
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Apr 20, 2018 04:44
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Just need one more set of three to have a roster of 36 then, right?
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Apr 20, 2018 13:24
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Yeah. I'll get the games started sometime this weekend.
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Apr 20, 2018 13:54
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The final three tributes for this round are Bebop!  Rocksteady!  and Kale! 
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Apr 22, 2018 05:51
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PROLOGUE TIME: UNKNOWN. PLACE: THE TECHNODROME, BETWEEN DIMENSIONS.  ...so in exchange for the box and your cooperation, we'll give you the Tape and the Chaos Emeralds we've gathered so far. If you'll sign your names on the lines, we can start the Hunger Games again. Hmph. Fine. As much as it pains me to do this, I'll sign. I trust your organization to hold up your end of the bargain. Then it's settled. We're going to begin the Something Awful Hunger Games again under our own terms! (...)Before I Am Bread signs the agreement, it wants all the toaster and toaster ovens removed from all the break areas.Are you loving...Superfly!Alright, poo poo.As much as I want to destroy Kakarot alone, it's better to have the cooperation.Kakarot?He means Son Goku.I've already lost to Kakarot and his pathetic friends twice. I refuse to lose to that trash anymore! I've restarted the Hunger Games for the sole purpose of drawing him out.We have the coordinates for the next round's location. Shadow, we need your power to take us back to Earth.I'll do it. CHAOS CONTROL!
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Apr 22, 2018 22:45
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| # ? Jun 10, 2024 16:00 |
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I'm glad that my buddy Superfly lived 
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Apr 22, 2018 22:46
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