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Instead of killing baby Hitler, why not just raise him to be a fine young man?
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May 7, 2018 00:57
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Snowglobe of Doom posted:I read a fantasy book where some guys went back to the time of Cuchulain and one of them was ordered to start singing and he busts out a wobbly off key version of "When Irish eyes are smiling" and is hailed as the greatest musician ever was it by l sprague de camp
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May 7, 2018 01:07
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Lobok posted:Instead of killing baby Hitler, why not just raise him to be a fine young man? I already tried that and we saw how that went.
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May 7, 2018 01:12
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Wait, when we were killing baby Hitler? I always thought the "Kill Hitler" mission went back to like 1930 or whatever.
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May 7, 2018 01:23
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Don't kill Hitler, don't make him a better artist, just negotiate the Treaty of Versailles to be less lovely to Germany. If you don't ruin the economy, he won't be so desperate after the war to wind up falling in with the NSDAP. Then maybe he just moves to America and becomes a scifi artist 
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May 7, 2018 01:30
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1stGear posted:Wait, when we were killing baby Hitler? I always thought the "Kill Hitler" mission went back to like 1930 or whatever. The Nazi party already existed by 1930. If you go back to then you have to kill a bunch of dudes.
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May 7, 2018 01:30
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Barudak posted:I already tried that and we saw how that went. So someone needs to go back in time and kill you before you attempted your terrible child-rearing. Edit: Hm, guessing you learned how to raise a child from your parents? Ok, add them to the list of undesirables, too.
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May 7, 2018 01:37
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Blade_of_tyshalle posted:Don't kill Hitler, don't make him a better artist, just negotiate the Treaty of Versailles to be less lovely to Germany. If you don't ruin the economy, he won't be so desperate after the war to wind up falling in with the NSDAP. Then maybe he just moves to America and becomes a scifi artist Nah, take over the French military and have them march all the way to Berlin, chasing the shattered remnants of the German army all the way. That way the stabbed in the back myth never takes off and the Germans know they got their rear end kicked.
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May 7, 2018 02:17
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Caufman posted:I'd give baby Hitler the same option I give every baby: call it, heads or tails. “People always say the same thing.” “Goo-gah?” “They say, "You don't have to do this."” *baby shits diaper* “Okay.”
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May 7, 2018 02:55
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VanSandman posted:Nah, take over the French military and have them march all the way to Berlin, chasing the shattered remnants of the German army all the way. That way the stabbed in the back myth never takes off and the Germans know they got their rear end kicked. You know they'd just say the "Jews" were the ones to let the defences fail. Assholes gonna rear end in a top hat.
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May 7, 2018 03:07
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time travelers kidnap artist hitler and place him with cheech and chong
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May 7, 2018 03:26
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Blade_of_tyshalle posted:Don't kill Hitler, don't make him a better artist, just negotiate the Treaty of Versailles to be less lovely to Germany. If you don't ruin the economy, he won't be so desperate after the war to wind up falling in with the NSDAP. Then maybe he just moves to America and becomes a scifi artist The treaty was less lovely than previous war ending treaties, and the Germans were allowed to renegotiate partway through. The idea that it was so bad that desperate measures were justified is the fruit of Nazi propaganda.
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May 7, 2018 03:28
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Grognan posted:time travelers kidnap artist hitler and place him with cheech and chong A regular pair of weedlord bromahitlers
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May 7, 2018 03:35
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Karate Bastard posted:Kids who look like that you just stomp them out. It's for the best. Lol that you think you’re tough enough to kill a baby who can already grow a mustache.
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May 7, 2018 04:14
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Just go back to the original pool of primordial ooze and stick your hand in it and stir it up a bit, splash it around kinda, so that instead of humans Earth gets some kind of hyperintelligent non violent crab type creatures.
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May 7, 2018 06:51
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Just lol if you think crabs are not violent. Those motherfucking claws are not just for show u know.
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May 7, 2018 07:10
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Blade_of_tyshalle posted:Don't kill Hitler, don't make him a better artist, just negotiate the Treaty of Versailles to be less lovely to Germany. If you don't ruin the economy, he won't be so desperate after the war to wind up falling in with the NSDAP. Then maybe he just moves to America and becomes a scifi artist Something like that is the backstory of The Iron Dream by Norman Spinrad. It’s a sci-fi novel written by Hitler, written to satirize the latent fascism of some sci-fi.
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May 7, 2018 08:11
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You could make the argument that authoritarian militarism was so ingrained into the Prusso-German society at that point that you would have to go back to 1848 and help the liberal Frankfurt Parliament to take the reins in order to reverse the Third Reich from appearing. Funny Forum Quotes right here
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May 7, 2018 10:24
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pog boyfriend posted:detective reading a note backwards in blood: hang on, if i just pull my mirror out *takes mirror and reads the backwards note* it says.. the bodies are found in updog. whats updog..? *suddenly realizes what he just did and slams fist on table*
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May 7, 2018 12:35
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lol if you need a mirror to read backwards writing
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May 7, 2018 14:06
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I can't read arabic even with a mirror 
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May 7, 2018 14:32
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Blue Footed Booby posted:The treaty was less lovely than previous war ending treaties, and the Germans were allowed to renegotiate partway through. The idea that it was so bad that desperate measures were justified is the fruit of Nazi propaganda.
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May 7, 2018 16:07
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They sort of took the long way around, but it’s interesting that Germany did ultimately end up ruling Europe after all.
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May 7, 2018 18:30
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fruit on the bottom posted:They sort of took the long way around, but it’s interesting that Germany did ultimately end up ruling Europe after all. Germany has always possessed by far the largest population of the European countries, a unified Germany would inevitably dominate Europe. Its just that in the 1300 years since Charlemagne they've actually been unified for maybe 100 years.
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May 7, 2018 18:54
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BIG FLUFFY DOG posted:Germany has always possessed by far the largest population of the European countries, 
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May 7, 2018 19:04
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Why'd you post the leader of an Asian country laughing, is that supposed to disprove his point or something
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May 7, 2018 19:07
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Son of Thunderbeast posted:Why'd you post the leader of an Asian country laughing, is that supposed to disprove his point or something 
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May 7, 2018 19:10
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Dying irl at this (because of the polonium)
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May 7, 2018 19:14
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Veni Vidi Ameche! posted:Lol that you think you’re tough enough to kill a baby who can already grow a mustache.  Read Dr McNinja if any of this is your bag, just sayin.
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May 7, 2018 19:24
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[Patton]Russians are Orientals![/Patton]
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May 7, 2018 19:39
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Just help the Communists win the revolution of 1918 and not get slaughtered by an alliance of proto-fascists and social democrats. Also Even though they are often given credit for ending it hyperinflation ended a decade before the NSDAP took power. The Great Depression was more their thing. FreudianSlippers has a new favorite as of 19:50 on May 7, 2018 |
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May 7, 2018 19:47
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Russians are Asian the same way the Finns are Mongols.
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May 7, 2018 19:48
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Everyone east of Calais is Asiatic.
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May 7, 2018 20:14
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doverhog posted:Russians are Asian the same way the Finns are Mongols. Finland exists within the borders of the Mongol continent? 
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May 7, 2018 20:15
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This is where we could get into a whole debate about what race means and if it's a social construct etc. but as this is not D&D let's just say I was making a feeble joke.
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May 7, 2018 20:36
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Son of Thunderbeast posted:Why'd you post the leader of an Asian country laughing, is that supposed to disprove his point or something So what’s kind of funny is the “traditional” boundary of Europe is along the Ural Mountains, the Ural River, the Caucasus Mountains, the Turkish Straits and the border with Kazakhstan. Russia overlaps this boundary. So there’s a “European” Russia (which is 77% of the population, but less than 25% of the territory) and an “Asian” Russia. In other words, everyone is right and wrong and this is all so loving stupid I hate the finns
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May 7, 2018 20:49
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fruit on the bottom posted:So what’s kind of funny is the “traditional” boundary of Europe is along the Ural Mountains, the Ural River, the Caucasus Mountains, the Turkish Straits and the border with Kazakhstan. 
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May 7, 2018 21:00
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fruit on the bottom posted:So what’s kind of funny is the “traditional” boundary of Europe is along the Ural Mountains, the Ural River, the Caucasus Mountains, the Turkish Straits and the border with Kazakhstan. The only reason the boundary is at the Urals in the first place is because of furious Russian lobbying to move the border back specifically so that they wouldn't be Asian. The Urals are really geographically and culturally insignificant otherwise and are really just pretentious hills.
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May 7, 2018 21:41
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doverhog posted:This is where we could get into a whole debate about what race means and if it's a social construct etc. but as this is not D&D let's just say I was making a feeble joke. I'm a halforc, so thanks for not bringing it up.
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May 7, 2018 22:05
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Slavic people used to be considered exotic, not European people. The orient express went from Paris to Istanbul. The Ottoman Empire at the time was considered eastern and oriental.
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May 7, 2018 22:07
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