|
"Should we be concerned about these radical zealots of Void Magic who constantly talk about retaking the Sunwell, and who if they succeed will almost definitely turn it into a font of Void energy whether they mean to or not?" "Meh  "
|
#
?
Jun 24, 2018 16:34
|
|
|
|
| # ? Jun 8, 2024 13:12 |
|
|
GhostStalker posted:Seeing as how they're apparently led by Alleria, who is pretty much the only High Elf hero still loyal to the Alliance (save maybe her sister who is, last I checked, one of the Archmages leading the Kirin Tor in Dalaran), High Command probably just took a look at who was leading them and shrugged. Vereesa is not a mage. Her husband was, but she's not. At this point, she's simply the leader of the largest remaining faction of High Elves, the Silver Covenant.
|
|
#
?
Jun 24, 2018 18:36
|
|
|
The void elves came into being to give a different atheistic than the fair-haired pale-skinned blood elves to the Alliance. Also trying to say "RARGH VOID BAD" when Warlocks are just right over there too is a joke.
|
|
#
?
Jun 24, 2018 23:53
|
|
|
McTimmy posted:The void elves came into being to give a different atheistic than the fair-haired pale-skinned blood elves to the Alliance. Unless I'm wrong (very much a possibility given what little I've proven to know), Warlocks are more fel which is like, "Death to all life!" Void is a bit more "Nothing for everyone forever!" But also I know zero about void elves, so it could just be that they're just trying to bring back Azerothian glam rock.
|
|
#
?
Jun 25, 2018 01:35
|
|
|
Fel isn't even death to all life. It's literally fantasy atomic power. It's chaotic energy, it just fucks poo poo up/changes poo poo willy nilly. Nuclear power splits atoms, the Fel splits souls. SHADOW is death to all life. McTimmy posted:The void elves came into being to give a different atheistic than the fair-haired pale-skinned blood elves to the Alliance. I mean, the Void has an even astonishingly lower success rate of being used without causing disaster than the Fel. One of the weaknesses of the themes they've been going forward with post-Legion is they want us to believe that Light and Void both have to exist for things to be gucci but they've not convincingly demonstrated that the Void isn't just bad news all the time. There's no real upside to using it. It doesn't offer you anything that another form of magic couldn't do with less horrific side effects. Even if you CAN master the Void the overriding question is "but y tho" Captain Oblivious fucked around with this message at 02:27 on Jun 25, 2018 |
|
#
?
Jun 25, 2018 02:23
|
|
|
DEATH is literally its own section adjacent to Shadow on the cosmology chart. Which has also tainted the Sunwell alongside Fel and Death Knights and actual undead are A-OK too. The whole situation is just hackneyed. "This things which actually have brought us to ruin are totally fine but this thing that could bring us to ruin is actually bad."
|
|
#
?
Jun 25, 2018 02:29
|
|
|
I mean yeah the thing that scared the poo poo out of the Actual Burning Legion seems pretty bad. I don't think that's a reach at all. That's not subtext that's just text 
|
|
#
?
Jun 25, 2018 03:53
|
|
|
 Heroes: Turalyon, like Cher or Madonna Lore for... Kobold Gold Thieves Now some of you may be looking on curiously. Turalyon? It looks like Blizzard just threw this guy into Beyond the Dark Portal and called it a day, right? What, no! He's been here all along. Don't you remember all those good times we had with Turalyon during the Second War? How he was the guy that started this whole shebang? That he was pretty much the dude of the Second War? No? poo poo, well, that's what we've got novelizations for. Turalyon was a late comer to the whole "war" thing since he was living up in Lordaeron when the orcs came rampaging through the Dark Portal. During that time, he was a priest, which is a little strange because the Light didn't really speak to him. I'm guessing he was a priest in the same sense that the dude that lived down the road from me was a priest. He imparted words of wisdom and invited us to his house for ice cream on the weekends. Not so much with the glowing magical hands that brought people back from a slow spiral towards the end. For some reason, he was present during the infamous "Council of Seven Nations" meeting with all the kings of the realm. This is when everyone was being super lovely to each other and being like, "Naw, man, magical green dudes from an evil portal burnt down your home? Pull the other leg, Lothar!" It was pretty clear that the Alliance was going to end before it even began. Until our boy Turalyon stepped up and started saying some really deep stuff that made everyone friends. I assume it was, "Seriously, guys. I don't like dying. You don't like dying. Let's work together to not die together." And then the Alliance was formed because of a priest that wandered into the chambers with the seven most powerful political figures in the land. But of course, the war needed to be stepped up. Those wimpy priests walking around in paper thin habits weren't able to stand up to big ol' axes and horrifically evil magic. That's when the archbishop of Northshire Abbey came up with a great idea: What if instead of robes, we had kickass armor? And instead of stupid, dumb sticks, we had big-rear end hammers that crush skulls? And thus first paladin order, the Knights of the Silver Hand, were born. The first members were made up of Uther, Tirion Fordring, Saidan Dathrohan, Gavinrad the Dire, and our boy Turalyon. These five were the first paladins of Azeroth and were sent forth to train soldiers, kick rear end, and believe in alien wind chime gods from space.  Every good sentai has five characters. Uther's Lightforged Pally Pals Go! But Turalyon is young and somewhat inexperienced. On top of that, the Light still hadn't spoken to him! Talk about a crisis of faith; you're one of the first paladins and you still can't... paladin. Well, that's when Anduin "Best Mullet" Lothar gave Turalyon the distinction of being his lieutenant. No worries. No stress. DON'T FREAK OUT, TURALYON. So Lothar and Turalyon start beating back the Horde where ever they can. Before long Turalyon joins up with Alleria Windrunner and Khadgar (someone at Blizzard better give these people some goddamn last names already!) to save Quel'thalas from the orcs. It... didn't go well. They managed to turn back the orcs, but large swaths of the elven land were put to the torch. Alleria was devastated. ...and Turalyon was a paladin who knew how to take advantage of emotional crises. So yeah, they start a weird romance born out of loss, vengeance, and elf/human taboo. Man those books go into just... just terrible territory. All I wanted was to read a book about the sword guys hittin' the axe guys! However, the war is going well for the Alliance on the whole. Lothar's forces beat the orcs back to Blackrock Spire. That's where a badass duel began between Lothar and Orgrim Doomhammer. This... went poorly for the Lion of Azeroth, as Doomhammer is still the winner of the "Most Badass" award. Doomhammer's Doomhammer snapped through Lothar's Great Royal Sword and caved in his helmet (and, presumably, skull). Now, you're Turalyon. You're all filled with self-doubt as to your role in the war, the god you champion the cause of has never spoken to you, your girlfriend is 100 years older than you and you watched parts of her homeland burn after you showed up too late. Now your idol, the coolest dude you've ever met, just got murderated by the biggest, most badass orc you've ever seen. What do you do? YOU GET FILLED WITH THE HOLY RADIANCE OF THE LIGHT AND GO ALL OUT KICKIN' rear end, THAT'S WHAT.  Guys, I typed in "power overwhelming" and now everything burns, but I think I like it? And filled with the power of the Light (and what I'm sure is some indescribable grief and rage), Turalyon picked up Lothar's broken blade and knocked out Doomhammer. The Alliance had won that day. Uther was so proud of Turalyon that he... let him name him. Wait that can't be right... Well. poo poo. It is. Okay so Turalyon was like, "Cool, Uther, your name is Uther the Lightbringer now." And then Uther just nodded while muttering, "...seems a little wordy to me, but whatevs. I'll probably take the 'the' out." From there, Turalyon took control of the Alliance forces and finished the Second War as the general of the Alliance. But it wasn't just the war that Turalyon won, but also the friendships along the way.
|
|
#
?
Jun 27, 2018 11:58
|
|
|
This took way too long to reply too...Captain Oblivious posted:I mean yeah the thing that scared the poo poo out of the Actual Burning Legion seems pretty bad. I don't think that's a reach at all. That's not subtext that's just text Right, but the BE leadership wouldn't have known about that. It was just generic bad stuff in the long line of generic bad stuff at the time. The Arcane summoned demons stop using it! BE: Feh it's fine, I'm gonna move out and arcane all I want MOM. *summons more demons* A demon has contaminated the Sunwell! BE: Aren't warlocks great! The undead have contaminated the Sunwell! BEs: Hey death knights sure are cool! The Void might damage the Sunwell! BEs: gently caress YOU AND EVERYTHING YOU'VE EVER DONE YOU'RE EXILED GO DIE IN A DITCH! Azzur posted:Amazing stuff. Truly amazing. Though the Cleric of Northshire has since been divorced as a separate character from Archbishop Make-the-Paladins.
|
|
#
?
Jun 27, 2018 13:12
|
|
|
Turalyon needs to be in the next Warcraft movie, yo!
|
|
#
?
Jun 27, 2018 13:19
|
|
|
Phew! I've been quiet in the thread lately since summer hit. I'm organizing some summer camps, planning my vacation, and training for a half-marathon. However, we're still going to be seeing the exciting conclusion to the Orc campaign this Saturday, as well as an Interlude update Friday night! After that... well, there may just be a break. Did you guys know that you're supposed to work out more than once a year?! I have so much catching up to do.
|
|
#
?
Jun 28, 2018 00:39
|
|
|
Everything about this, from the filename to the image itself, is absolutely magical. 
|
|
#
?
Jun 28, 2018 01:15
|
|
|
I lost it at the Paladin sentai.
|
|
#
?
Jun 28, 2018 04:39
|
|
|
Originally the script read "Draw Uther standing on two paladins while wielding two other paladins like arms and legs," but the drawing ended up looking super wonky.
|
|
#
?
Jun 28, 2018 04:46
|
|
|
Azzur posted:Originally the script read "Draw Uther standing on two paladins while wielding two other paladins like arms and legs," but the drawing ended up looking super wonky. 
|
|
#
?
Jun 28, 2018 04:56
|
|
|
McTimmy posted:This took way too long to reply too... The difference is that the other things had to deliberately contaminate the Sunwell, the Void does it basically automatically by virtue of what Naaru are. This isn't news either, we've seen Naaru go dark four times by this point. And the Blood Elves now know that for a demonstrable fact. This kind of makes the Void Elves assholes willfully endangering their homeland with a repeat of the last crisis for no other reason than, poo poo, Void magic is badass? I guess? There's no real clear benefit to loving with it. That was always the thing that struck me. "Why are we doing this?" Captain Oblivious fucked around with this message at 05:19 on Jun 28, 2018 |
|
#
?
Jun 28, 2018 05:17
|
|
|
Captain Oblivious posted:The difference is that the other things had to deliberately contaminate the Sunwell, the Void does it basically automatically by virtue of what Naaru are. This isn't news either, we've seen Naaru go dark four times by this point. Clearly they have broken the 4th wall and are trying to end everything to escape their tortured state of eternal limbo with facts and history changing constantly.
|
|
#
?
Jun 28, 2018 06:06
|
|
|
Captain Oblivious posted:The difference is that the other things had to deliberately contaminate the Sunwell, the Void does it basically automatically by virtue of what Naaru are. This isn't news either, we've seen Naaru go dark four times by this point. ...what? I seriously have no idea how to parse that first paragraph of yours. The naaru haven't done anything to the Sunwell except for M'uru's heart purifying it after he'd gone Void. And that goes back back to the first point about the Arcane summoning demons to threaten the world and what caused the Sundering but the past blood elves going "BIRTHRIGHT!" and doing it anyway for ten thousand years.
|
|
#
?
Jun 28, 2018 07:28
|
|
|
McTimmy posted:...what? I seriously have no idea how to parse that first paragraph of yours. The naaru haven't done anything to the Sunwell except for M'uru's heart purifying it after he'd gone Void. Have you not played the Allied Race scenarios? Well let me clarify. The Sunwell is literally Naaru powered. It is vulnerable to being corrupted by the Void as a consequence. Just like the four Naaru we’ve seen do exactly that. Your comparison to the Arcane doesn’t follow because the Arcane does not summon demons as an intrinsic characteristic. Hell not even the Fel does that and the Fel is pretty bad news! The Void has a will of it’s own and ACTIVELY tries to gently caress poo poo up. The Fel and the Arcane both are capable of doing damage but are not even capable of actively striving to gently caress poo poo up on their own. Make sense?
|
|
#
?
Jun 28, 2018 21:02
|
|
|
Of course not!
|
|
#
?
Jun 28, 2018 21:13
|
|
|
Captain Oblivious posted:Have you not played the Allied Race scenarios? Well let me clarify. The Sunwell is literally Naaru powered. It is vulnerable to being corrupted by the Void as a consequence. Just like the four Naaru we’ve seen do exactly that. bunnyofdoom posted:Of course not! warcraftlore.txt
|
|
#
?
Jun 28, 2018 21:59
|
|
|
I...do not disagree 
|
|
#
?
Jun 28, 2018 22:04
|
|
|
 The Blasted Lands, at a small encampment not far from the Dark Portal...   : They are humans. Nothing more. How could they rout your vaunted "Warsong?" : THIS IS A DEAD LAND, FIEND. SURELY YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS. : Hmphh, so the great Hellscream had trouble scraping together supplies to combat a human assault? You're weak, Grom.: PROVE THAT ON THE BATTLEFIELD, DESERTER.: Enough! What we must do now is plain to see. We must take back the portal. : Ah, but mon, our forces be lookin' kinda small...: I'll handle that, now someone tell me where- : ...Necksmasher is. : Heeeeey! It's all you assholes. Guess who got that book thing? This guy.: OH, GREAT. THE HUMAN CHIEFTAIN.: Shouty is still here? For the love of- : ...I mean, you're welcome. I had to kill a bunch of people to get that.: Knight Darkweaver, I'll have you handle him. : Darkweaver?!: Handle me?! : Hey! Watch it!  : Neckssssmasher... you thought you could get away with thissss?: Anyone want to fill me in on what the gently caress is going on?: Vilefeast! What's going on?: I'm taking you back to Ner'zhul. Planning on sssstaying here in Azeroth-: The country, the kingdom, or the world?: -and abandoning your people? I think not.: ...: Ssssilence? That'ssss new for you, Neckssssmasher.: Nigel is an idiot, yes. But you can't do this to him, Vilefeast. He-: Vilefeasssst is dead. And I can do as I pleasssse. On your feet, Neckssssmasher. : After we take the Portal, we'll have a little talk with Ner'zhul, won't we? : What... what just happened?: Revenge issss ssssweet, issssn't it?: ...I'm going to kill this poo poo out of you. Again.
|
|
#
?
Jun 29, 2018 08:23
|
|
|
And we will enjoy watching you do it, Nigel! 
|
|
#
?
Jun 29, 2018 08:59
|
|
|
This cannot end well for darkweaver. Don't you know that you never turn your back on a prisoner? Also that handcuffs have the consistency of tissue paper when drama happens.
|
|
#
?
Jun 29, 2018 11:26
|
|
|
Well, the update was almost all ready to roll out tomorrow, but it looks like I've got some meetings to go to and it's keeping me out of the house until Monday rolls around. Uh, so... the schedule is getting thrown off just a bit! Sorry, all!
|
|
#
?
Jun 29, 2018 11:48
|
|
|
My workplace's company went under today, but seeing this many quality drawings has helped my mood a bit. 
|
|
#
?
Jun 29, 2018 19:50
|
|
|
The hype is real. I cannot wait to see how this ends.
|
|
#
?
Jun 29, 2018 20:02
|
|
|
We're in the endgame! Well, of the orc game. Great art! And cliffhanger!
|
|
#
?
Jun 30, 2018 07:08
|
|
|
I'll be excited to see how the gang gets out of this one.
|
|
#
?
Jun 30, 2018 08:09
|
|
|
Well we'll see if this ends with Vilefeast as a lich as most of the Old Death Knights ended up after Ner'zhul accidentally the world.
|
|
#
?
Jun 30, 2018 17:04
|
|
|
Super duper not dead, feeling really bad about being thrown from the schedule so hard, but it turns out that things have been getting just a touch more hectic. We should absolutely have the update tomorrow, then a recap Lore update Saturday (hopefully!). In other news, anyone know any quickie Portuguese they want to teach me?
|
|
#
?
Jul 2, 2018 14:17
|
|
|
What kind of Portuguese do you need? I'm Brazilian.
|
|
#
?
Jul 2, 2018 14:25
|
|
|
How did I miss Azzur being back! Time to catch up, keep up the good work man! 
|
|
#
?
Jul 2, 2018 14:38
|
|
|
HardDiskD posted:What kind of Portuguese do you need? I'm Brazilian. HOW CONVENIENT. I've fallen into a rough crowd of the nicest Brazilians and I can only get so far with "Vai tomar no cu," and occasionally calling someone "Kenga." This is a beautiful language of sexual innuendo and swearing and I love it.
|
|
#
?
Jul 2, 2018 14:49
|
|
|
Max Payne 3 is my only exposure to Brazil, but it is nevertheless highly recommended. Looking forward to the update!
|
|
#
?
Jul 2, 2018 14:52
|
|
|
Azzur posted:HOW CONVENIENT. I've fallen into a rough crowd of the nicest Brazilians and I can only get so far with "Vai tomar no cu," and occasionally calling someone "Kenga." This is a beautiful language of sexual innuendo and swearing and I love it. I'm a bit busy right now but I'm going to PM you a nice and definitively non-exhaustive list of expletives for day-to-day use when I get around to it, if that sounds good to you.
|
|
#
?
Jul 2, 2018 16:34
|
|
|
Episode 15: The Dark Portal or A New Victory Mission Briefing Before I launch into this mission at all, I have to apologize right off the bat. Thanks to my recording getting corrupted, I ended up losing the footage for the first bit of the attack. But good news! I had some (several) other runs that made it past that point. However, you'll notice that once we switch back to screenshots from the corrupted run, the quality drops. I'm very sorry about that. I hope you all still enjoy!  : Report. : THE WARSONG ARE READY, WRAITH.  : We are sure of this assault?  : Getting cold feet, Tons o' Fun?: It angers us that you would continue with your awful jabs.: UGH, SOMEONE TELL THE WALKING COTTAGE CHEESE MOUNTAIN TO SHUT UP ALREADY. : Hsss... Yeah, in addition to all of the other heroes, you get loving Deathwing on this map. How many of you saw that one coming? And he is a goddamn tank. Welcome to the final level of the orc campaign and the hardest mission in Beyond the Dark Portal! : The prattle of your inferiors is like discordant music sent tumbling down a cliff side, Gorefiend.: My apologies, Lord Deathwing.: Haha, "Lord" Deathwing... : Taking orders from a drat lizard. Ol' Cloak For Brains never really was an orc, huh?: Chief, dis may not be da time-: Ssssilence, Neckssssmasher!: Er, if I may, Lord Gorefiend? : While we're beginning this assault, it wouldn't hurt to get some infrastru-: Some enchantments to aid in your flight, Lord Deathwing.: And our own magicks to boil the blood. That is Haste and Bloodlust on the most powerful unit in the game. Let that one sink in for a minute. : Ha. Hahaha... HAHAHAHAAHA!: ...Chief? Ain'tcha gonna say som'tin'?: ...It's pronounced "magic," you excessively stuffed sausage.: Not really what I was tinkin'. Hello, tower.  Goodbye, tower. : I DON'T UNDERSTAND. WE'RE TO LET THIS... THING TAKE ALL THE GLORY?: I agree, Hellscream. Let us in there! We'll rout the humans in moments! : Is that so, chieftains? Perhaps you would do well to voice your concerns to Ner'zhul directly along with Chieftain Necksmasher? : ...: That is what we thought. There may be a better way to handle the initial siege than just throwing Deathwing at it, but I don't know one, so it's all dragon all the time. He's good for cracking the nut that is Kul Tiras's early defenses. : He'ssss doing jusssst assss you ssssaid, my lord. He issss a forcccce of desssstruction.: But we will not leave him unsupported. Troll, move those catapults up!: Da what?: ...the death wagons, Mag'fon. : Why didn't 'e jus' say dat? : KARGATH! FINALLY, SOMETHING FOR US TO DO!: Haha! Lok'tar ogar!   : HAHAHAHAHA!: You two want nothing more than to throw your lives away.: Netherspit, you are the biggest buzzkill.: BIGGEST? HAHAHAHAHA!: Hahahaha!: How excccceedingly immature... Real quick, let's talk about this map. You have two objectives here: capture the Dark Portal and kill every drat human in between you and it. What complicates matters is that there are not two... not three... but four human factions to contend with. A quick rundown: We have Dalaran in the northwestern corner, guarded already by Kul Tiras's defenses and their own. They're fairly aggressive and are happy to put on the pressure early in the game while upgrading their units. We have Lordaeron in the southern portion of the map. They're hugely aggressive and send waves and waves of paladins to just gently caress your poo poo up. They're the biggest obstacle to surviving the first few minutes of this map. Rounding out the more immediate problems is Kul Tiras itself which actually... well, they ain't poo poo. They are the barrier to overcome initially, but after that, they're just a speedbump. They don't upgrade their units and as far as I know they really don't launch any threatening attacks. Which leaves Stormwind/Azeroth. Let's take a look:  Yup, secluded on the Dark Portal's "bracket islands" are the Azerothian forces. Since they're so far away they won't contribute to the fight, right? Hahaha, this is Beyond the Dark Portal, motherfuckers. They send a relentless onslaught of griffon riders at you, often two or three at a time. This isn't so bad when they come alone, but when you're also fending off simultaneous attacks from the OTHER THREE FACTIONS, it can be a little trying. There's also another BIG problem on this map.  Five gold mines. Five separate armies fighting to control them. The good news is that Kul Tiras, backwards dumb idiots that they are, never claim their second gold mine (that I've seen, at least). But it still means that we can't dilly-dally or we'll be left on the backfoot when it comes time to shift our production to air units and naval forces for the last leg of the map. From the onset, it may seem intelligent to work your way south to take the unclaimed gold mine and work your way through the rest of Kul Tiras, but then you're throwing gold at a weak enemy while the real threats are putting their gold to use battering you. So what do we do?  Here's the plan. gently caress Kul Tiras. I tried smashing these guys and taking their gold mines, but I was left fending off attacks from all sides. No, Dalaran has a nice defensible position. We want that. Of course... we just have to get it first. We'll, uh, see how this all goes. : ...and that is how we shall retake the Portal.: You have a pet dragon that can swallow an entire human army and belch out their spines. Why not just stick with the plan of "murder everything until there stops being everything"?: Ssssilencccce, traitor!: My thanks, Knight Darkweaver. Now if you'll excuse me... : By the ancestors, I hate all of you.: Even me?: Especially you! What the Nether are you doing?! Get me out of here! : Chieftain, this really is for your own good. You can't stay here in the human lands.: I will literally die if I go back to that place.: You're exaggerating. : Did you not hear what Vile... err... Darkweaver said? I'll have a "talk" with Ner'zhul. Come on, no one comes out of those alive.: Chief, who be dis Darkweava' guy? I dun unda'stand what be goin' on.: He's some guy I killed. Probably a little pissed about that, too. : It's... it's not Darkweaver, Chieftain. That's just ridiculous. Vilefeast just hit his head or something.: Hahaha, how adorable. Ssssorry, peon, but that moron issss long gone.: Someone wanna tell me what in da world be goin' on?! : Ssssimple. Gul'dan placccced me in your sssslasher'ssss empty head. But I had no control. Jusssst my guidancccce. No ssssentienccce...: That night when Vilefeast was killed...: Hahaha! I have been with him for longer. I could sssstart to take control after hissss death.: You orcs are, wit'out a doubt, mon, da most freaky tings I evah met.: RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHR! : How about that, Maggy? A bloodraged magically altered dragon the size of a mountain. That do anything for ya?: Can I change my mind, mon? Can I stay here in da human lands?: Plenty of room in the cage. : This... "Deathwing." Can we trust him?: We may not have the Demon Soul any longer, but we have some leverage over this one. He needs us to succeed.: Hmph.  : He certainly is more powerful than the other dragons we have bred.: I have come to believe that he existed for far longer, as well. : Fascinating. I'd like to note just how far I've progressed with Deathwing, haste, and bloodlust. I've only done a little bit of striking out with my other units. He's doing all the heavy lifting here.   : drat it all! We've got knights coming in from the south! So, unfortunately, the attacks start coming in hard and frequent. I'm not showing them off because they're exactly as interesting as six knights charging into the rear of your army can be. And it happens frequently enough that it's a pretty boring sight. It also severely weakens your forces while you're trying to hold off the rear assault and still push forward. : Grom, I'm taking my Shattered Hand to hold them off as you advance. Lok'tar ogar!: LOK'TAR OGAR, CHIEFTAIN! WARSONG, RAISE YOUR AXES IN VICTORY! THE SANDS WILL BE STAINED RED WITH THE BLOOD OF THE HUMANS! : I know you guys are having fun killing all the humans and everything, but does anyone want to let me out of this friggin' cage?! : Chieftain, could you please be quiet? We're trying to take back the Portal right now.: I... I... WHAT?! Bloodgut, if I survive my meeting with Ner'zhul, I am going to gouge out your eyes with your own tooth!: This is what is best for the Horde. : Takin' heavy lossses, Gorefiend-mon!: Then fight better.: You heard him, troll. Get thosssse axxxxessss in the air. : drat THESE DWARVES AND THEIR OVERSIZED CHICKENS!: We will handle this. Knight Darkweaver?: Of coursssse, my lord. : Bloodbelly... ya tink we may have backed da wrong team here?: We have a shot at a real future, Mag'fon! Don't throw that away for Nigel!: I'm not... I jus'... deese zombie lords be bad voodoo, mon. Bonus points if you can tell why this ended up being a failed run. : This outpost is ours now. Darkweaver, I'm giving you command of the ground forces while we continue our assault.: Yessss, my lord. You heard him, peon! Get thissss basssse fortified.: Er, at once Vile... Lord Darkweaver.Later...  : Hmph... it issss accccceptable.: Thank you, my lord.: Bloodbelly, are ya serious, mon? Ya ain't da bowin' an' scrapin' type! ...well, at least not like dis. : I have also seen fit to begin construction on some-: Ssssilencccce! Do you hear that?: I don't- : 'Sssspit! Troll, do ssssomething! : Ooh, mon, I'd love to, but my throwin' arm is all tired afta' killin' all dem otha' humans.: What?! Inssssubordination! : Just keep it busy, Vilefeast! We've nearly got those towers manned!: Tch... ya a traita' to ya people, Bloodbelly.: Yeah, you tell him, you also-traitor idiot. : 'Sup?: Ah... Chief. 'Dis, uh, be awkward.: Really? No this seems pretty ordinary for a mutiny. Er... a land mutiny. : Chief, trust me, I unda'stand more den most. But ya gotta pay fer ya crimes.: My what?! Wait... do you even know why I'm in this cage?: ...cause o' all da drinkin' while on da job?: By the Nether, all of my subordinates are idiots. : My lord, we have our barracks up and running. I've already begun outfitting several of-: I could not sssstand your prattle while I lived insssside thissss sssskull, what makessss you think I want to hear it now?: Uh... : The Kul Tiran ballistae?: Holy crap, they're not just for sealing inside of walls it seems.: Rrrr... TROLL!  : Li'l busy, Vile-mon!: FOR THE LASSSST TIME, I AM NOT THAT BUFFOON!: Oh... right... : Y'know, this is kinda fun to watch when it's not all happening to me.: QUIET, NECKSSSSMASHER! : Problem solved, uh... Dark-mon? Weava'-mon?: Jusssst call me lord like your sssspinelesssss friend.: Hahahaha. No, no... Tha's not gonna happen.: What?!: I dun bend me knees fer nobody, Weava'mon.: Hahaha, this is awesome. : ...there are ssssome chickenssss than need axessss, troll. Yeah, the aerial assaults from Azeroth are pretty brutal. The gryphon riders don't trickle in, they come in waves of two or three, meaning you really have to be ready at all times. Thus, a poo poo ton of towers. : Whateva' ya say, Weava'-mon.: I could tear your ssssoul out where you sssstand. : Ya could do dat, but den who ya be gettin' ta lead ya men on da front lines?: Maggy, I just want you to know...: Eh, Chief?: If I had soul-ripping powers, I would absolutely tear your soul out for backtalk. But also you're doing great, keep up the good work. : Actually, speaking of the front lines, I've turned production over to catapults. : Death wagons!: You two have carried that joke on for far too long. It'ssss time to behave like real warriorssss.: Boo! : And the firsssst sssstep issss to ssssecure the landssss of the Kul Tiranssss.: Maybe avoid dem "s" sounds, Weava'-mon?: Why doessss everyone ssssay that?  : Charge! Like I said earlier, Kul Tiras really doesn't pose much of a threat. It's not surprising since they don't upgrade their units at any point and all they ever really do is send over a few ballistae to harass you. As long as you protect your : What do you think, Neckssssmasher?: I think it's a little weird that you're actually carting me around the battlefield just so you can show off "Human Genocide 101.": I wassss the right hand of Blackhand. I wassss a member of the high order of nercolytessss. You? You were a drunk. : Hey! I wasn't a drunk! I am a drunk. Get your tenses right, you lisping rear end in a top hat. : And you... you had the gall to kill me.: You started it! You literally started it! How is this my fault?!Back at the base...  : Where is the death knight, peon?: Vilefeast? Er, Darkweaver? He's taking care of the Kul Tiras forces that we came through.: Still? He works slowly. Nevertheless, we have taken care supplying your troops with the magicks needed to put these humans down.: Uh, yes, of course. Thank you, Master Dentarg.: Hmph... finally, we are shown some respect.: Hey! Is that Tubsy-Wubsy over there? Hey, Pork Thighs! Get me out of here!: ...Yes, well... what is it exactly that's going to happen to Nigel, speaking of which? : Necksmasher represents a chink in the solidarity in the Horde that Ner'zhul wishes to recreate.: Well, yes, that's... sort of the thing with Nigel. He's always been that way. : As were the Thunderlords and the Bonechewers before they were brought to heel.: By Nigel.: Working in service of the Horde occasionally does not counter his undermining of our authority continually. : So, again, what is going to happen to Nigel?: Simply put, Necksmasher will-: PEON! I have need of you!: You had best go.: But Nigel-: PEON! Where are you?! : You call, lord?: Thesssse humanssss no longer posssse a threat to us. But we have giftssss from Lord Deathwing that we need mobilizzzzed.: I'm no dragon tamer, Lord. You... you know that, right?: I don't assssk my men for their hobbiessss, jusssst that they know how to lissssten.: I... right away, my lord. : Uhh... Bloodbelly, why're ya harnassin' all dem dragons? : ...orders from Vilefeast.: Dat ain't Vile-mon, mon.: Mag'fon, he's got to be in there somewhere... right?: ...right, mon. Oh yeah, small problem. Dalaran didn't exactly have a huge gold mine. : PEON!: I have to go.Later in the ruins of the Kul Tiran settlement...  : ...and with a few towers around the perimeter, we would be safe from any gryphon raids.: By the eight-teets of the she-bitch of Blackhand... I. Do not. Care.: Well, it's just so rare that you actually listen to me during the planning stages of base building.: Maybe you should just keep everyone that you want to talk to imprisoned in a cage. It seems to be doing wonders for your social skills! : Ah, ha! See, Nigel? Perfect planning again.: I'm going to sleep now. Wake me when I have to be executed.: Sorry, Chief. Can't letcha sleep. Boss's orda's.: My one regret in life is not giving out more daily beatings to you two.  : Reportssss from Dentarg'ssss magi show a gold mine to the easssst.: And?: Shut it, troll. I'm talking to the peon.: I'll get right on it. : So, Maggy, how about breaking me out of this thing? You and I fight our way past the guards and escape into the human lands, killing indiscriminately until I can build up another Horde for us.: Chief-mon, I dun like dis new direction da Horde is takin', but ya gotta have faith dat tings will work out. : Faith? Look, Muttonchops, the gods are dead and if they aren't, I will personally strangle them for their bullshit. Now get me out of here!: Let da system do it's job.: The system is run by other people! And they suck! : Looks like da forces be movin' out, Chief. I gotta go.: People suck, Maggy! People suck so hard! : We've got the dragons taking care of the Lordaeron ground forces, my lord.: Where issss that troll? I need thesssse catapultssss on the front linessss.: 'Ey, right 'ere, Weava'-mon. So Lordaeron has this little entrenched redoubt of barracks that are set to constantly churn out paladins. Unlike the Kul Tiras forces, Lordaeron actually upgrades their units, which means that these paladins are little wrecking balls that can heal themselves. Moving quickly to take out this little barracks pack in pretty helpful in the long run.  : Thissss issss going too sssslow.: Weava'-mon, dis is pretty normal for us.: We have a traitor to bring before Ner'zhul! Time issss of the esssssencccce!: I thought that perhaps we could recruit from Gorefiend's Cult of the Damned. : Mmm... yessss, good, good.: Uh, Weava'-mon? We got problems. Oh, and Lordaeron also has a few mages. : Magessss? : Actually, mon, lotsa mages.: drat it all! Get me thosssse death knightssss! : On their way, lord. : And they've already made contact with the enemy. : Aww, magic battles? I'm missing out on magic battles?: It's nothin' ya ain't seen before, Chief-mon.: We truly don't know what we've got until it's taken from us.  : I'm a lil' surprised dat dis is goin' so well.: The battle isn't done. We haven't secured the Portal yet.  : Go, my minionssss! Kill! Kill!: Blood! Blood! Blood! ...come on, Weava'-mon. You do it, too. : Never again, troll.: ...Bloodbelly, I tink dat maybe it's gonna be hard ta get Vile-mon back.: It's a strange world filled with things we don't understand, Mag'fon. Who knows what the future holds? : Yup. It's official. You two are the dumbest people I've ever met. : Allow me to explain, since you two are apparently allergic to the truth. : You got suckered into following around a Grade A bootlicker just because he's wearing your friend's flesh. Vilefeast... That isn't Vilefeast anymore. He's gone.: Chief-: I'M NOT CRYING, IT'S THE DAMNED SMOKE FROM ALL THE CORPSES ON FIRE! : We have word from our sssscoutssss.  : Human shipyards. So? : Sssso they've esssscaped acrosssss the water! The humanssss have dug in around the Portal!: So we...? : Gather the black dragonflight.: No... no, no, no... : NO! DAMMIT! I WANT TO RIDE THE DRAGON!: Nigel, could you shut up already?: No, absolutely not. Honestly, once you've gotten a foothold on this map, it's really not so difficult. However, it IS laborious. The problem with Beyond the Dark Portal's difficulty curve is that it's just hard enough to be frustrating, but once you get stabilized, it's a slog of wearing down your enemy's defenses while they launch the same assaults they had been sending since the beginning. Taking on Azeroth here is a good example of "slow, boring clean up."  But they have a huge gold mine if you really need it! : Troll! While I'm gone, I want you to ready the men for a beach landing by the Dark Portal!: Dat was a lot o' words without any lispin'.: People with glass speech impediments shouldn't throw stones, Tusks.: That doesn't quite work, Nigel.  : A towa'. Da humans are guardin' da Portal wit' a single towa'. : Ah, and a few soldiers.  Yup, the Alliance heroes show up on the last mission. I'm not sure if the original plan for Beyond the Dark Portal was to have the two campaigns operate as though the other didn't exist, but you do have to kill them to continue. Obviously though, they're just getting routed and have to flee the battlefield! : Though... dey do look a bit more terrifyin' den da otha' humans.  : Hahahaha! Finally! At long lasssst! Freedom! Vengeancccce! Neckssssmasher! : 'Ey! Weava'-mon! We got some nasty humans all up in da Dark Portal, mon!: Do they have dragonssss assss well?: Ah, well, no, mon.: Then I am not too conccccerned. What did Blizzard expect would happen?! You'd land your forces and have an epic duel in front of the Dark Portal? No, gently caress that, you have dragons!  : Feel the might of Lord Darkweaver, humanssss! : We must away from this place! Regroup back at Nethergarde Keep! : drat, that Wells may have had a point. These orcs are vicious! : Did Kurdran make it out alright?Elsewhere...    : I'm certain he's fine. He's a resourceful dwarf.Not long later...  : The humans have been pushed back for now. We must go!: Where is Chieftain Hellscream?: Still fighting. He's deep in the bloodlust now.: Forget him. We have the artifacts, we must move now to complete Ner'zhul's designs.: Indeed. Ner'zhul's designs. : Wait, wait, wait. Grom gets to stay, but I'm about to get killed for wanting the same thing?!: Haha, hosed, ain't it?: We were drinking buddies, Korgath.: It's Kargath. : Pleasssse, Neckssssmasher. Musssst you inssssisssst on flailing like a child even after being caught?: Yes, dammit! That's what I do! : At long lasssst... : Victory.
Azzur fucked around with this message at 15:29 on Jul 3, 2018 |
|
#
?
Jul 3, 2018 11:05
|
|
|
And because some people were having better luck with the off-site when it came to updates: Here you go!
Azzur fucked around with this message at 11:13 on Jul 3, 2018 |
|
#
?
Jul 3, 2018 11:06
|
|
|
|
| # ? Jun 8, 2024 13:12 |
|
|
Ok, after that update Nigel is officially my favorite literary drunk ever. I loved all his lines! Downer of an ending, but maybe the human campaign will sort things out. We’ll see. The three things that make this Mission easier if anyone is wondering- you have all the heroes, the humans are predictable mostly (Azzur explained how), and best of all it’s ok for your heroes to die on this mission! Gorefiend exorcism? No longer a game over! Grom and Fatso can lead suicide charges! If you don’t mind losing the heroes go ahead and use them for all they’re worth! In fact I’m surprised Azzur kept them all alive far as I could tell. Big congratulations on that and the Designer rank. Hope your break isn’t too long, looking forward to the next update.
|
|
#
?
Jul 3, 2018 14:40
|
|