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https://twitter.com/ADeCinque/status/1012733926429872131 footnote 3 is a pro-read
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Jun 29, 2018 17:31
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evilweasel posted:https://twitter.com/ADeCinque/status/1012733926429872131 "Judge, my client's best chance to win in his case is to continue trial until December, when the victim has a vacation to Bermuda booked and paid for. I have a Constitutional duty to represent my client as vigorously as I can with respect to this request to continue trial, which means I'm stoned as gently caress right now." That would 100% happen in Alaska. Heck that's far more tame than most shenanigans.
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Jun 29, 2018 19:53
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I'm more floored that you can be charged with possession of meth in Georgia simply by testing positive for a drug test. And apparently if you continue to test hot they just add more possession charges.
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Jun 29, 2018 23:33
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GamingHyena posted:I'm more floored that you can be charged with possession of meth in Georgia simply by testing positive for a drug test. And apparently if you continue to test hot they just add more possession charges. New Hampshire calls it "Internal Possession" when underaged kids are drunk.
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Jun 29, 2018 23:36
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Discendo Vox fucked around with this message at 04:06 on Jul 13, 2021 |
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Jun 30, 2018 18:06
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Debatable if vomit is hostile.
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Jun 30, 2018 19:34
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Discendo Vox fucked around with this message at 04:06 on Jul 13, 2021 |
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Jun 30, 2018 20:28
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GamingHyena posted:I'm more floored that you can be charged with possession of meth in Georgia simply by testing positive for a drug test. And apparently if you continue to test hot they just add more possession charges. I am a self-admitted law and order agent of “the man” and even I think this is dumb as gently caress. Pook Good Mook posted:New Hampshire calls it "Internal Possession" when underaged kids are drunk. This is also dumb.
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Jul 1, 2018 17:19
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ActusRhesus posted:I am a self-admitted law and order agent of “the man” and even I think this is dumb as gently caress. How many 112 alphas did you prosecute?
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Jul 1, 2018 22:19
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joat mon posted:How many 112 alphas did you prosecute? Honestly? None. We administratively separated all those. Who the hell wants to waste the time and money on a court martial for that poo poo? Some we even didn’t bother with boards and gave them a General or honorable to make them go away.
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Jul 1, 2018 23:12
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ActusRhesus posted:Honestly? None. We administratively separated all those. Who the hell wants to waste the time and money on a court martial for that poo poo? Some we even didn’t bother with boards and gave them a General or honorable to make them go away. Dang. Go Navy, then. In the mid 90s the SpCMs at Lejune ran about 45% unauthorized absences, 40% hot urinalysises and 15% everything else.
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Jul 2, 2018 01:28
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GamingHyena posted:I'm more floored that you can be charged with possession of meth in Georgia simply by testing positive for a drug test. And apparently if you continue to test hot they just add more possession charges. Charging is probably p easy if your juridiction’s judge/jury will go along with whatever you feel like doing.
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Jul 2, 2018 17:28
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I play a rhyme game with a friend from law school who is an ADA, text from him today: “Office mate ‘do you think I could get indecent exposure on 4 naked guys at an apartment pool..?’ Immediate response ‘unless they’re jerkin, that charge ain’t workin’”
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Jul 3, 2018 00:19
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Nice.
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Jul 3, 2018 01:38
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In which a man is murdered in federal court within the first five minutes.
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Jul 3, 2018 02:44
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 Holy god this is like a snuff film where the guy won't die.
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Jul 3, 2018 02:57
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SlothBear posted:
this amended complaint is something alright.
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Jul 3, 2018 03:05
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I thought: "man the judge is being hard on this pro se....... Ohh no!"
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Jul 3, 2018 03:58
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ekeog posted:this amended complaint is something alright. That's some lovely formatting alright
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Jul 3, 2018 06:38
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ekeog posted:this amended complaint is something alright. This is what federal courts get for make consumer law plaintiffs basically sanction proof. Nothing is ever bad faith in consumer law if you’re on the plaintiffs side
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Jul 3, 2018 06:55
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Gonna use that for my law clerks and staff to look at when I say "formatting and white space matter!" They blow me off but that complaint looks terrible regardless of content.
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Jul 3, 2018 12:01
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wooof that was one of the most brutal OAs I've ever heard. Dude doesn't even get to say hello before he just starts getting eviscerated. And at the end of his opening, the judge ripping into him the most is just like "save yourself some rebuttal" telling him to shut the gently caress up and sit down.
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Jul 3, 2018 12:35
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Jul 3, 2018 12:52
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Holy poo poo this is hilarious
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Jul 3, 2018 13:30
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For all us new lawyers that have yet to file a complaint in federal appellate court or argue one, in broad terms what is the problem with what he filed? Aside from not alleging any wrongdoing by one of the Defendants and the formatting obviously.
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Jul 3, 2018 14:05
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Pook Good Mook posted:For all us new lawyers that have yet to file a complaint in federal appellate court or argue one, in broad terms what is the problem with what he filed? Aside from not alleging any wrongdoing by one of the Defendants and the formatting obviously. I gathered from the audio that the case was originally filed in state court, removed (properly) to federal district court, motion for more definite answer, response (which just added the parenthetical defendants at the top of each complaint), motion for summary judgement, and then 53 page district court ruling that granted the MSJ in part or possibly in whole. So #1 wrong with what he filed: just loving look at the amended complaint. Without even reading it, it looks like poo poo and that right there is strike one. Second, in the motion for a more definite answer, the respondent cited all the circuit court cases that explain what a shotgun pleading is, and how specifically to correct it. The appellant, although he claims to have done so, did not read any of the cases or follow the guidance within. There is a bevy of recent 11th circuit guidance on specifically how to fix state claims that have been removed that are full of shotgun pleadings that do not conform with FRCP. The judge chewing him out from the start was probably involved with or may have even written some of said guidance. It was basically a 1-2 punch of submitting something to the court with such pisspoor formatting that it becomes difficult to read, and then further not complying with the circuit rules that were clearly outlined in recent rulings. e: I'm thumbing through the relevant 11th circuit case - it's a 2015 ruling where the court went out of it's way to address shotgun pleadings specifically. The court went through 60 different decisions since 1985 that addressed the matter and outlined 4 types of "shotgun pleadings" quote:Though the groupings cannot be too finely drawn, we have identified four rough types or categories of shotgun pleadings. The most common type — by a long shot — is a complaint containing multiple counts where each count adopts the allegations of all preceding counts, causing each successive count to carry all that came before and the last count to be a combination of the entire complaint. The next most common type, at least as far as our published opinions on the subject reflect, is a complaint that does not commit the mortal sin of re-alleging all preceding counts but is guilty of the venial sin of being replete with conclusory, vague, and immaterial facts not obviously connected to any particular cause of action. The third type of shotgun pleading is one that commits the sin of not separating into a different count each cause of action or claim for relief. Fourth, and finally, there is the relatively rare sin of asserting multiple claims against multiple defendants without specifying which defendant(s) are responsible for which acts or omissions, or which of the defendant(s) the claim is brought against. The unifying characteristic of all types of shotgun pleadings is that they fail to one degree or another, and in one way or another, to give the defendants adequate notice of the claims against them and the grounds upon which each claim rests. Our esteemed Bama colleague was guilty of at least 3 of the 4, and probably #2 as well. Mr. Nice! fucked around with this message at 14:27 on Jul 3, 2018 |
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Jul 3, 2018 14:16
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From the context clues (lovely lawyer + incomprehensible filing + Wells Fargo Defendant + federal removal) I'm guessing it was a foreclosure, and the homeowners filed suit to stop the sale. They typically do this to buy themselves another couple of months, rent free, in the house. The next step for the bank is usually to remove to federal court, where they tear the homeowner to shreds. A settlement with Wells Fargo probably means they agreed to a cash for keys move out, and when they got the rest of their claims trounced, they filed an appeal trying to squeeze another tiny settlement out of someone else.
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Jul 3, 2018 14:26
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jesus christ e: lol "judge with all due respect that's a ridiculous statement" hoo boy Soothing Vapors fucked around with this message at 14:33 on Jul 3, 2018 |
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Jul 3, 2018 14:29
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blarzgh posted:From the context clues (lovely lawyer + incomprehensible filing + Wells Fargo Defendant + federal removal) I'm guessing it was a foreclosure, and the homeowners filed suit to stop the sale. They typically do this to buy themselves another couple of months, rent free, in the house. The next step for the bank is usually to remove to federal court, where they tear the homeowner to shreds. From my listen earlier, there was a legitimate issue of improper assignment and payments properly sent in not being accepted. Those were only lightly touched upon in the OA because almost all of Mr. Lay's time was him getting ripped in two for his lovely complaint. This gets touched on lightly during the respondent's presentation, but it's mostly glossed over. If I'm right, the 11th will probably uphold the MSJ for everything except the improper assignment and breach, and it will review those de novo and probably still find in favor of the banks. e: https://dockets.justia.com/docket/circuit-courts/ca11/16-16685 defendants are Bank of America and a loan company. They settled with BoA and the loan company is the only remaining, iirc from the OA. Also, as far as I can tell, there's no published or unpublished decision from this case. Mr. Nice! fucked around with this message at 14:41 on Jul 3, 2018 |
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Jul 3, 2018 14:35
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I don’t believe that’s the worst complaint any judge with a 50 year career would have ever seen. Definitely not a circuit containing Alabama and Florida.
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Jul 3, 2018 14:48
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Look Sir Droids posted:I don’t believe that’s the worst complaint any judge with a 50 year career would have ever seen. Definitely not a circuit containing Alabama and Florida. That was sorta the reason for my question. Formatting was clearly poo poo, but at least it had SOME causes of action.
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Jul 3, 2018 14:51
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Pook Good Mook posted:That was sorta the reason for my question. Formatting was clearly poo poo, but at least it had SOME causes of action. The 11th circuit has been bitching about shotgun pleadings in dicta and occasionally in decisions since 1985 and in 2015 had a case that flat out said "these four main types of shotgun pleadings do not comport with rules 8&12 of FRCP and should be dismissed." Our friend here filed a case in a bama state court a year later that was guilty of all 4. He was removed to federal court and had two opportunities to fix the complaint. The defendants, otoh, properly followed the guidance that said when presented with a shotgun pleading, file first for a motion for a more definite answer, and then for summary judgement. The apparently cited multiple cases when filing for the more definite answer, and then bamalawyer literally adds a parenthetical to the top of each complaint and does nothing to fix anything. Like I posted earlier, the 11th recognizes 4 types of shotgun pleading: 1. Where each complaint adopts all allegations of the preceding claims. 2. Complaints filled with conclusory, vague, and immaterial facts not obviously connected to any particular cause of action. 3. Not separating each cause of action into a different count. 4. Asserting multiple claims against multiple defendants without specifying which defendant is responsible for each. The chief judge made a point in the July 2015 case Weiland v. Palm Beach County Sheriff’s Office to outline these and what to do. I'm not sure if he was specifically the judge that ripped into him at the OA or not. Either way, all Bamalawyer had to do was correct a few minor things, and the pleading would have been fine. He flat out did not look at the cases in the motion for more definite statement or the district judges guidance in granting the motion and thought he could "aw, shucks" it through. He wasn't getting chewed out for the formatting, grammar, or anything else. He got loving ripped because he had two chances to correct a defect that was spelled out for him and did nothing to do so. The only defect he even attempted to correct was #4 and that was done in a garbage manner. Mr. Nice! fucked around with this message at 15:08 on Jul 3, 2018 |
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Jul 3, 2018 15:01
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Pook Good Mook posted:That was sorta the reason for my question. Formatting was clearly poo poo, but at least it had SOME causes of action. Well, he alleged a bunch of horseshit. It’s not just the formatting. But still, no way that’s “the worst.” And yeah, the real sin here for the CoA is he didn’t take his chances to clean it up. That’s why the judge says he should be sanctioned. Look Sir Droids fucked around with this message at 15:35 on Jul 3, 2018 |
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Jul 3, 2018 15:33
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The first of those types of shotgun pleading may be a question of local practice. Around here we begin ever cause of action with “Plaintiff incorporates by reference paragraphs 1-X if the complaint as though set forth fully herein” blah blah blah. Nobody really thinks it means anything but its standard practice. The problem is when your cause of action does not separately set out the facts establishing your elements, and instead your say “as set forth above, there was lots of fraud and a contract and damages and such.” Also the improper assignments claim is complete garbage. It’s pled in like one paragraph that says basically these defendants are not the original lender and there was no valid assignment. It’s the kind of pro se bullshit argument that had popped up since the robot signing debacle. If the trustee of the securitized trust holds the note, who gives a gently caress about the assignments? Stop complaining about them! Just pay your drat mortgage. The only allegation in the complaint that might have let a cause of action survive was the claim that they paid their mortgage on three separate dates but had their payments refused. I guess that might make the foreclosure invalid? But they don’t plead that they made all required payments or the dates of payments and the refused payments were like three years before the foreclosure so it’s not plausible that they were the whole cause of the foreclosure. Basically the complaint is turbo garbage because it has no factual allegations and broadly asserts that the defendants did bad stuff without saying what it was.
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Jul 3, 2018 15:53
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Soothing Vapors posted:jesus christ I can't believe he got away with saying that
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Jul 3, 2018 15:59
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Arcturas posted:The first of those types of shotgun pleading may be a question of local practice. Around here we begin ever cause of action with “Plaintiff incorporates by reference paragraphs 1-X if the complaint as though set forth fully herein” blah blah blah. Nobody really thinks it means anything but its standard practice. The problem is when your cause of action does not separately set out the facts establishing your elements, and instead your say “as set forth above, there was lots of fraud and a contract and damages and such.”
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Jul 3, 2018 16:05
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EwokEntourage posted:Yea I see that all the time and never once have I seen anyone, lawyer or judge, consider that to combine all the causes of action into one like the judge at the OA said (unless I Misunderstood what he was saying) Yeah, this falls under 'know your audience' I guess. In particular, know that the 11th circuit has been so conspicuously mad about this for years that when you google 'shotgun pleading' 8 out of 10 results on the first page are about that circuit hating it.
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Jul 3, 2018 16:15
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EwokEntourage posted:Yea I see that all the time and never once have I seen anyone, lawyer or judge, consider that to combine all the causes of action into one like the judge at the OA said (unless I Misunderstood what he was saying) Incorporating by reference para 1-x where x is the paragraph before the first claim would have been fine. It's blanket "everything before this point is realleged" that the 11th circuit doesn't like, and there are a long string of cases including the one I pointed out that say specifically "do not do that because it's treated as incorporating previous claims into subsequent ones." It's a minor procedural quibble, but literally changing the first sentence of each claim to exactly what you typed instead of the blanket phrase would have been acceptable. The improper assignment and stuff doesn't come from the amended pleading, but rather the 53 page order from the district court on appeal that actually does outline the proper causes of action and claim for relief. I want to read that, personally, because I'm bored and it's something to do before colombia's match later. I'm about to go shred some potatoes for hashbrowns for brinner tonight.
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Jul 3, 2018 16:17
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I am glad I do not do that kind of law and instead my law is all "My ex is withholding my three year old because she made a sexual outcry to the policeman he took her to to tell the policeman my boyfriend stuck his finger in her butthole" law.
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Jul 3, 2018 17:08
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Kinda wanna hire Mr. NICE now.
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Jul 3, 2018 17:58
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