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FUCKFACE MORON
Apr 23, 2010

by sebmojo
I'm glad Von Miller choked him

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The Bananana
May 21, 2008

This is a metaphor, a Christian allegory. The fact that I have to explain to you that Jesus is the Warthog, and the Banana is drepanocytosis is just embarrassing for you.



I need to fire Jason Garrett, but I'm not Jerry Jones.
What can I do?

Chilichimp
Oct 24, 2006

TIE Adv xWampa

It wamp, and it stomp

Grimey Drawer
Nick loving Foles, superbowl champion.

The world is a strange place.

The Bananana posted:

I need to fire Jason Garrett, but I'm not Jerry Jones.
What can I do?

Spread a rumor.

Randaconda
Jul 3, 2014

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Blitz7x posted:

I'm glad his career is almost over

Edit: with zero to show for it

As time goes on, Eli looks smarter and smarter for not wanting any part of that lovely organization. Wasted LdT and Phillip Rivers lol

Barudak
May 7, 2007

The Bananana posted:

I need to fire Jason Garrett, but I'm not Jerry Jones.
What can I do?

How good are you at sucking geriatrics ego?

seiferguy
Jun 9, 2005

FLAWED
INTUITION



Toilet Rascal
Frank Clark lost 12 pounds over the week prior to this week's game due to food poisoning and needed 8 IVs to replenish :stonk:

wandler20
Nov 13, 2002

How many Championships?

Randaconda posted:

As time goes on, Eli looks smarter and smarter for not wanting any part of that lovely organization. Wasted LdT and Phillip Rivers lol

They're basically a minor league team playing in a pro league.

Impossibly Perfect Sphere
Nov 6, 2002

They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!
Some on reddit pointed out that the Browns have won and lost every possible way in just five weeks:

Tied

Lost in regulation

Won in Regulation

Lost in overtime

Won in overtime

a neat cape
Feb 22, 2007

Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!

wandler20 posted:

They're basically a minor league team playing in a pro league.

Turn on your monitor

Ghost Dog
Aug 17, 2016

yikes

FUCKFACE MORON
Apr 23, 2010

by sebmojo

Randaconda posted:

As time goes on, Eli looks smarter and smarter for not wanting any part of that lovely organization. Wasted LdT and Phillip Rivers lol
I think that was more Archie's call


Someone post that extreme close-up of Eli going "UH-DOYYYYYYYYYYYY"

GOOD TIMES ON METH
Mar 17, 2006

Fun Shoe

Jiminy Christmas! Shoes! posted:

Some on reddit pointed out that the Browns have won and lost every possible way in just five weeks:

Tied

Lost in regulation

Won in Regulation

Lost in overtime

Won in overtime

Can you forfeit games in the NFL

Randaconda
Jul 3, 2014

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

cavallingus posted:

I think that was more Archie's call


Someone post that extreme close-up of Eli going "UH-DOYYYYYYYYYYYY"

Regardless, it worked out way better for Eli.

Can't wait for 2025 when the Chargers move to... *rolls dice* Kansas City!

a neat cape
Feb 22, 2007

Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!

Randaconda posted:

Regardless, it worked out way better for Eli.

Can't wait for 2025 when the Chargers move to... *rolls dice* Kansas City!

Yeah they're gonna move somewhere that lowers the team value, that makes sense.

Both teams got what they wanted in the Eli/Rivers deal. Chargers got the better player, Giants got the Manning name

Hizawk
Jun 18, 2004

High on the Lions.

GOOD TIMES ON METH posted:

Can you forfeit games in the NFL

Week 6: Browns visiting team plane crashes forcing the forfeit.

GOOD TIMES ON METH posted:

Can you forfeit games in the NFL

Week 7:. In typical Browns fashion, their plane crashes.

Final record:. 3-3-1. Forever.

a patagonian cavy
Jan 12, 2009

UUA CVG 230000 KZID /RM TODAY IS THE FIRST DAY OF THE BENGALS DYNASTY

GOOD TIMES ON METH posted:

Can you forfeit games in the NFL

yeah it's recorded as a 2-0 win for the other team iirc

Impossibly Perfect Sphere
Nov 6, 2002

They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!
No one has ever forfeited in the NFL.

Diqnol
May 10, 2010

Jiminy Christmas! Shoes! posted:

No one has ever forfeited in the NFL.

Yeah, why is that? You'd think the bodybag game Eagles fans have spoken of would have been reason enough for it.

Randaconda
Jul 3, 2014

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

a neat cape posted:

Yeah they're gonna move somewhere that lowers the team value, that makes sense.

Both teams got what they wanted in the Eli/Rivers deal. Chargers got the better player, Giants got the Manning name

Giants got a HoF player, Chargers got a Hall of Very Good player.

:smugdog:

a neat cape
Feb 22, 2007

Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!

GOOD TIMES ON METH posted:

Can you forfeit games in the NFL

I think you CAN, it's just never happened.

GOOD TIMES ON METH
Mar 17, 2006

Fun Shoe

Jiminy Christmas! Shoes! posted:

No one has ever forfeited in the NFL.

Not yet at least

a neat cape
Feb 22, 2007

Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!

Randaconda posted:

Giants got a HoF player, Chargers got a Hall of Very Good player.

:smugdog:

Rivers is objectively better than Eli is.

Randaconda
Jul 3, 2014

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

ELO Musk posted:

Yeah, why is that? You'd think the bodybag game Eagles fans have spoken of would have been reason enough for it.

What was the bodybag game?


Also, what's the plan if something terrible happens and a plane crashes and kills most/all of a team? Emergency draft where teams can only protect one or two players?

Impossibly Perfect Sphere
Nov 6, 2002

They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!
Closest thing: Pats pull off a 2pt conversion against zero defenders after Bills leave the field early. Starts just after 7:20 in.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wBdw4_gBwZo&t=442s

Randaconda
Jul 3, 2014

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

a neat cape posted:

Rivers is objectively better than Eli is.

As proven by the only metric that counts.

Diqnol
May 10, 2010

Randaconda posted:

What was the bodybag game?


Also, what's the plan if something terrible happens and a plane crashes and kills most/all of a team? Emergency draft where teams can only protect one or two players?

It's a game during the Buddy Ryan days where we took out all 3 QBs on the roster and they had to put the punter in as a QB and the dude nearly poo poo himself.

a neat cape
Feb 22, 2007

Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!

Randaconda posted:

As proven by the only metric that counts.



Eli had better teams and had a better coachand played in the lesser conference, yes

Ben Nevis
Jan 20, 2011

a neat cape posted:

Eli had better teams and had a better coachand played in the lesser conference, yes

Better players than the best running back ever?

ZenVulgarity
Oct 9, 2012

I made the hat by transforming my zen

a neat cape posted:

Eli had better teams and had a better coachand played in the lesser conference, yes

Beat the goat twice

Impossibly Perfect Sphere
Nov 6, 2002

They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!

a neat cape posted:

Eli had better teams and had a better coachand played in the lesser conference, yes

The late aught Chargers were absolutely stacked.

seiferguy
Jun 9, 2005

FLAWED
INTUITION



Toilet Rascal
The Giants won their super bowls on their defensive prowess, hth

Black Sunshine
Apr 4, 2004

LEFT 4 DEAD IS A LOT LIKE FOOTBALL - I JERK OFF TO BOTH

a neat cape posted:

Eli had better teams and had a better coachand played in the lesser conference, yes

I mean, you're not wrong but those two rings represent Tom Brady losing to the shortbus Manning and that's hilarious.

Ben Nevis posted:

Better players than the best running back ever?

Barry was never a Charger WTF dude

a neat cape
Feb 22, 2007

Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!

Ben Nevis posted:

Better players than the best running back ever?

Rivers never had Walter Payton.

And by the time Rivers came into his own around 2008 or 2009, Tomlinson was a shell of his former self. He had his best years with Brees and Rivers' first year.

a neat cape
Feb 22, 2007

Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!

Jiminy Christmas! Shoes! posted:

The late aught Chargers were absolutely stacked.

Mid aught, yeah. Late aught, not so much.

Acebuckeye13
Nov 2, 2010

Against All Tyrants

Ultra Carp

Ben Nevis posted:

Better players than the best running back ever?

But Barry retired long before Rivers started playing :confused:


Randaconda posted:

What was the bodybag game?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Body_Bag_Game

a neat cape
Feb 22, 2007

Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!
2007 is still frustrating because Rivers was a lot better than 2006, but we had to go to foxboro for the AFC championship against the unbeaten Patriots with a RB who played two snaps, a TE with a broken foot, a pass rusher (merriman) and QB who were both playing on torm acls, and a kicker with a broken plant leg

Impossibly Perfect Sphere
Nov 6, 2002

They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!

a neat cape posted:

2007 is still frustrating because Rivers was a lot better than 2006, but we had to go to foxboro for the AFC championship against the unbeaten Patriots with a RB who played two snaps, a TE with a broken foot, a pass rusher (merriman) and QB who were both playing on torm acls, and a kicker with a broken plant leg

Yeah but it gave us this, so totally worth it.

FUCKFACE MORON
Apr 23, 2010

by sebmojo

a neat cape posted:

2007 is still frustrating because Rivers was a lot better than 2006, but we had to go to foxboro for the AFC championship against the unbeaten Patriots with a RB who played two snaps, a TE with a broken foot, a pass rusher (merriman) and QB who were both playing on torm acls, and a kicker with a broken plant leg
You guys almost won too

a neat cape
Feb 22, 2007

Aw hunny, these came out GREAT!

Jiminy Christmas! Shoes! posted:

Yeah but it gave us this, so totally worth it.



Needs the giant parka to be perfect

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pasaluki
Feb 27, 2008

THIS WHAGON HAS NO BREAKS! I HAVE THE HEART OF THE BUUFALO the strength OF THE MOUNTAIN, THE FURY OF THE THUNDER AND MY WILL IS UNBREAKABLE! I will not surrender to KNOW ONE

It's almost like the QBs are starting to figure out they can't be hit anymore...

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