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Rageaholic Monkey posted:That's just a lovely spraypaint job, isn't it?
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Feb 6, 2019 04:34
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I'm the hand drilled jem handle. That is what's happening in the upper left right
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Feb 6, 2019 05:05
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Yea I think we’re all not appreciating the diy monkey grip.
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Feb 6, 2019 07:44
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Monkey Grips are precious creations that must be nurtured as seen fit.
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Feb 6, 2019 08:23
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Rageaholic Monkey posted:That's just a lovely spraypaint job, isn't it? If you look closely on that shelf you can see that cans of spray paint he used. Krylon and Rustoluem. Goober didn’t even bother to match brands. I’ll give the guitar a 1 out of 10 due to the packers sweater slung over the chair. Nice touch.
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Feb 6, 2019 14:40
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Krustic posted:If you look closely on that shelf you can see that cans of spray paint he used. Krylon and Rustoluem. Goober didn’t even bother to match brands. I’ll give the guitar a 1 out of 10 due to the packers sweater slung over the chair. Nice touch. I'm giving it an 11/10 because there's a Harbor Freight 6 outlet plug in the background too, so the problem will solve itself shortly 
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Feb 6, 2019 19:43
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The best Prince cover is Erotic City
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Feb 7, 2019 03:27
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Tell me about some of your hellgigs. Mine isn’t too bad but entails driving 80 miles for a gig then we couldn’t find the place we were playing at cause our navigation software kept routing us to a dead end due to construction. It was ridiculous cause the drive was supposed to take 5 minutes from where we were but took about an hour to find and no one answered when we called the venue. Once we finally arrived barely on time there’s nobody there and then we found out we are opening for a karaoke act, no money, and no free alcohol. Got a flat tire on the way home. That’s it. Please share your hellgig stories.
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Feb 7, 2019 17:03
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Played three hours to almost empty room in a "country club". Given that this was supposed to have been a more upscale gig than our normal dive bars, I had invited some family to come watch. The "country club" turned out to be the kind of bar that has to go "members only" because they keep losing their liquor license. The free dinner was some corn chips with shredded cheese poured on top and microwaved. The dish itself smelled like nicotine. The beer smelled like nicotine. The building itself looked like the barroom from a 1970s Clint Eastwood movie that had never been cleaned or remodeled in the subsequent 40 years; this description also applied to the patrons. We spent most of the time dealing with a belligerent drunken late-50s lady who alternated between complaining about our song selection and shouting "now you got some dancers!" and boomer-twerking when we did play something she liked. After playing the last twenty minutes to an empty room we called it at midnight, only to be banned from the venue because they were open till 2:00 AM and we had quit playing "early".
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Feb 7, 2019 17:55
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Played at another place scheduled to be on Bar Rescue, which the bartender was oddly proud of, except someone came in and shot him the week after our gig and it was canceled.
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Feb 7, 2019 17:58
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What music were people playing, I'm trying to get a sense of what the audience (or lack thereof) would be.
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Feb 7, 2019 18:03
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s.i.r.e. posted:What music were people playing, I'm trying to get a sense of what the audience (or lack thereof) would be. We did originals in actual venues, and paid the bills with wedding/corporate/house band gigs as well so we could pull off probably several hundred different cover songs. Pretty much all your bar band standards, pop hits, enough country to keep people satisfied if they wanted to hear some, etc. I think it was less an issue of songs not matching audience and more of an issue of no one there wanted to hear a band at all. 50s Twerker lost her mind for "Get Lucky", of all things.
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Feb 7, 2019 18:15
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s.i.r.e. posted:What music were people playing, I'm trying to get a sense of what the audience (or lack thereof) would be. Metal.
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Feb 7, 2019 18:53
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CheesyDog posted:Played three hours to almost empty room in a "country club". Given that this was supposed to have been a more upscale gig than our normal dive bars, I had invited some family to come watch. Lol, the place I was at did offer us some terrible looking food. None of us tried anything. I like how your venue acted like banning you from a shithole they were probably lucky to have you in was a fitting punishment. I don’t think they realize they were probably doing your band a favor.
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Feb 7, 2019 18:58
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CheesyDog posted:Played at another place scheduled to be on Bar Rescue, which the bartender was oddly proud of, except someone came in and shot him the week after our gig and it was canceled. Holy poo poo, that place in Nashville? There’s only one Bar Rescue murder I know about, and we’ve been watching a shitload of that show lately
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Feb 7, 2019 19:17
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Pablo Nergigante posted:Holy poo poo, that place in Nashville? There’s only one Bar Rescue murder I know about, and we’ve been watching a shitload of that show lately lol I just googled this and had no idea they actually filmed the episode. I had my details about the shooting wrong but that's definitely the place.
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Feb 7, 2019 19:23
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Played in a venue in the northern arse end of england, as we pulled up to the venue we realised it was a combination bar/restaurant/pizza place. The live in owner greeted us and seemed friendly enough. We were supposed to staying at the venue but after being shown to our rooms they were in such a dank, mildew-ey state that half the band elected to get a hotel room, the other half sleep on the floor in the bar itself rather than dank unwashed mildey beds. After a few drinks the venue owner became the kind of drunk who loses focus in his eyes and gets a slightly intimidating, nasty edge. The barmaid quit that night in tears after being berated by him "why is he always like this every weekend?!" was the phrase I heard. We play in the basement, 4 or so people show up, theres an altercation between the keyboard player and the owner after he realises he's been filming us with the cameras in the venue without telling us in advance. (I dont care personally but whatever) I got out after the gig, try to get back in only to find the doors are locked. I call up the bass player, and apparently I'm not 'allowed' back in by the venue owner. 'This is my house! I don't just let anyone into my house, would you let me into your house? I could be anyone you know? I could stab you while you sleep! GooD NIGHT!" was the rant I heard relayed to me after. I get back first thing in the morning (I stayed in the hotel room) all our gear is piled up at the door for a quick load into the van and exit. According to the bassist and drummer when they woke up in the night the venue owner had elected to sleep on the bar room floor with them. massive spider fucked around with this message at 19:28 on Feb 7, 2019 |
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Feb 7, 2019 19:26
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New Years' Eve gig in a Midwestern basement with the typical insufficient punk rock PA, vocal mic stand sitting half in a puddle of standing water the entire time, any time I so much as brushed the mic I got shocked. Spent the entire gig twisting my body weird, so there was no chance of the guitar touching the mic stand and completing a circuit, as if singing into that thing was remotely safe otherwise. On the bright side though this probably gave the the audience of mostly drunk, disinterested college kids something to look at while wondering if the idiot singing would actually die before the set ended. The second we were finished I wondered why we'd bothered at all. Ran into the guy who'd organized the thing afterwards and went to complain about the lovely, hazardous PA situation but he was already down in his cups moaning about how "the scene" would really explode "like Seattle" (this was the 90s, duh) if only all the bands would get on the same page and work together. At this point I realized he was just a well-intentioned moron and realized it was as much my fault as his for not just walking the gently caress away, so at least I learned something that day: the show doesnt, in fact, have to go on, and sometimes it's just not loving worth it.
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Feb 7, 2019 19:30
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massive spider posted:According to the bassist and drummer when they woke up in the night the venue owner had elected to sleep on the bar room floor with them. 
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Feb 7, 2019 19:34
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Krustic posted:Tell me about some of your hellgigs. Mine isn’t too bad but entails driving 80 miles for a gig then we couldn’t find the place we were playing at cause our navigation software kept routing us to a dead end due to construction. It was ridiculous cause the drive was supposed to take 5 minutes from where we were but took about an hour to find and no one answered when we called the venue. Once we finally arrived barely on time there’s nobody there and then we found out we are opening for a karaoke act, no money, and no free alcohol. Got a flat tire on the way home. That’s it. Please share your hellgig stories. Honestly it could've been worse. It was just like we were driving 3 hours to rehearse in front of a few people. The best part of that show was going to Cracker Barrel for dinner (since we'd gotten there way early). I don't think we got paid for the show either, or if we did it wasn't much. So basically we were paying out of pocket for gas and food to play a show that we didn't get any feedback from, positive or negative. Rageaholic fucked around with this message at 20:52 on Feb 7, 2019 |
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Feb 7, 2019 20:47
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Krustic posted:Tell me about some of your hellgigs.
A little under two years ago, this friend I have that teaches at the local Yamaha Music School told me that a drummer she's friends with was looking for a guitar player for an "early In Flames / At the Gates" style sound. Two mid-March 2017 rehearsals later, we had a band. He already had a lead guitar player and through other mutual friends we secured a bass player for the 2nd rehearsal and we've been in the band ever since. That same weekend, a friend who had just finished rehabilitation after his car crash had begun to slowly re-learn to drum, but he needed money, so I agreed to help him back on his feet, so with him as the foundation, we started both a "bar/covers band" and a wedding band... ... then a month later, this girl who I've had met maybe twice contacted me and said "Do you like Explosions in the Sky and Isis the band?". If I were a cat, both bands would be like catnip, so it was the quickest yes I've given to somebody. So in less than 2 months I went from being a semi-retired recording engineer with no day job to being in 3 -technically 4- bands. Oh, and I had gotten a day job shortly after. Back to 2019 and more specifically last weekend at a wedding reception, this dumb, angry motherfucker started baying orders at me that we should be playing now. I told him that, traditionally, it wasn't until everyone was at their tables that we started playing. Since I was washing my hands off after doing my business, I was kinda just trying to get him off my back when all of a sudden, he pulls a gun on me and starts yelling at me. Some context: Monterrey has always had a mafia/cartel problem. Even before "the 1st wave of gang violence" that started back in 2008 and lasted until like 2011, the local/national mafia has always been running some big chunks of Monterrey's metropolitan area. Like, it's probably not as bad as, say, New Jersey or some other cities in the US, but it's there. Luckily for me, the shithead's dad (who also happened to be the bride's dad and the one bankrolling this whole thang) swung by and proceeded to smack his son for being a dumbshit. He apologized and requested if we could start playing in a couple of minutes, since they wanted to start doing toasts and all that junk, so we had to do our thing. The reception went fine and everything, but as someone who hates any type of gun and gun-related violence, it still kinda put me on edge. So yeah, I suppose that's not so much a hellgig as it is "dealing with the physical avatar of the scum of your local area".
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Feb 7, 2019 21:05
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CheesyDog posted:50s Twerker lost her mind for "Get Lucky", of all things. gently caress Your Website posted:New Years' Eve gig in a Midwestern basement with the typical insufficient punk rock PA, vocal mic stand sitting half in a puddle of standing water the entire time, any time I so much as brushed the mic I got shocked. massive spider posted:According to the bassist and drummer when they woke up in the night the venue owner had elected to sleep on the bar room floor with them. LOL!!!. Screw that guy! Rageaholic Monkey posted:I don't know how the gently caress we even got booked there, but my bandmate did all the booking. I was in my last band for over a year and a half and still to this day have no idea who did the booking or social media stuff. I think it might’ve been the guy I replaced.
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Feb 7, 2019 21:13
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Wark Say posted:
I love long texty posts especially when I’m board at work. Having a gun pointed at you counts as a hell gig in my book. A hellgig thread would be cool. Thanks for sharing.
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Feb 7, 2019 21:32
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I just remembered another one. Not really a hellgig so much as a weird experience. We played at this German Biergarten here in New Orleans while their Oktoberfest celebration was going on (again, another place that I have no idea how we got booked at), but the festival was going on in the ground level and outdoors while we were playing on the second floor in this big reception hall type room. We probably had like 20 people there for us, but they were all our friends. Nobody was coming from the festival to check us out. I don't think there was even any signage for our set. Also we weren't given any parking spots for playing there so we had to park on the street a few blocks away in a not so great neighborhood and haul all our equipment a few blocks to the venue. And then in order to not disturb the festival with load in, we were told to load in via the outdoor stairs to the second floor, so we're hauling big amps up two levels of stairs and poo poo. ...okay, maybe that was a hellgig after all
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Feb 7, 2019 21:59
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Played a show in Alabama doing covers but we were from Atlanta. Got to sweet home Alabama and someone in the bar audience yelled "YALL AINT FROM ALABAMA" so i yell back "neither was skynyrd" and the guy tried to fight me after the show Wasnt a hell gig bc we got to spend 2 days on a lake w a boat and we got paid up front lol
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Feb 7, 2019 22:08
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I’ve been fortunate to never play a gig nearly as bad as any of these, probably the worst was when a woman got vertigo and fainted during our set and we had to stop for about 20 minutes while EMTs came and took care of her, but it wasn’t a bad gig necessarily and she was okay
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Feb 7, 2019 23:52
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Although that reminds me of one of the worst/best gigs I’ve ever attended, it was at some defunct warehouse venue in Williamsburg in the mid-2000s and I think it was co-sponsored by Red Stripe so they had like $2 beers? So it was full of obnoxious drunk assholes, the bands I remember were a dance punk band called Moving Units, Weird War which is Ian Svenonius from Nation of Ulysses and the Unicorns who I went to see. During Moving Units’ set some big drink dude got on stage and stage dove and landed on top of a woman who was like 5 foot and petite and she slammed her head on the concrete floor. They had to stop the gig of course so EMTs could come in, she was ok but very dazed. And then when the Unicorns came on they kept loudly insulting the audience. Looking back the 2000s indie rock scene was a loving nightmare
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Feb 8, 2019 00:09
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In terms of most depressing, I did six months with a club band touring working men's clubs and seaside resorts in some of the lesser known post-industrial slumps of Northern England. They were all hell gigs. Set one would go out to a packed room of pensioners and be met with wave of deafening indifference, then we'd run offstage so they could hold the bingo and the meat raffle, then back an hour later for the second set to an empty house. Then we would get back in the van and drive three hours home for a gig that effectively paid us slightly under minimum wage. I was standing in for a permanent bass player for a bit and the band wore matching suits be use if you swapped ties and shirts in the break it meant you had a costume change and could charge more, in the same way as our three cans on a tripod counted as a 'light show.' As I was only a sub instead of buying a uniform I was expected to wear the other guy's kit, which would have been fine except he was roughly two and a bit of me so I had to spend ages cinching the entire thing in around my backside with safety pins. I eventually just started telling people I had been very ill recently. I finally drew the line and knew I had to quit when we played a show at some nowheresville during the holidays when the students were home. There was an incredibly attractive young lady obviously out with her parents for the evening and equally obviously giving me the eye. These weren't usually those type of shows and I wasn't often looking, but I've never been one to inspect a gift equine so got chatting to her afterwards and she ended up inviting me back to her hotel. I'm extremely happy about where this is going so I nip back to the van to let them know I'll be making my own way back in the morning, at which point the bandleader kicks off on fifteen different tangents about why they can't just leave me here, and why it would damage the reputation of the band, and so on, and so on. Things were looking like a hassle so I regretfully turned down her offer (but passed her my number) and finished loading. We all hop in to go, but what's this? The guitarist is driving instead of the bandleader? And he's not here as we set off? I look out of the back window to see him walking off down the street with his arm round the same young lady, and so we sadly head off for the long drive home with only an echoing "GOOOOOO gently caress YOURSELLLLLFF AND YOUR BAND!" echoing behind us. Good times! I actually bumped into him recently and he had no recollection of my tenure with the band whatsoever. Alcoholism is apparently a bitch on the memory.
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Feb 8, 2019 00:35
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Hellgig thread seems like a winner idea to me for sure, someone start it https://heartbreakerguitars.com/collections/mcpherson-guitars/products/mcpherson-sable-honeycomb-finish-gold-hardware-2 Getting back to stupid guitars, I'm willing to concede that this is probably exactly someone's cup of tea, but that person is 10000% not me and I probably don't want to know them anyway, and $3500 is way to much for something this fugly.
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Feb 8, 2019 00:39
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thanks i hate it
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Feb 8, 2019 01:01
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gently caress Your Website posted:
it's not often you see an instrument and immediately know what kind of music is made with it
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Feb 8, 2019 01:44
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I’m in a couple Kemper groups because I find the users to be hilarious. They have recently been complaining about the resale value of their beloved sacred objects. I remember one guy complaining he couldn’t get $1600 for his unpowered Kemper. That’s right. $1600 for a used preamp and he was complaining nobody was interested. I believe we have now entered my favorite part of every new generation of modeling amp: the extreme bitterness and cutting your losses phase. Will they buy tube amps again? Switch to Helix or Fractal?! Stay tuned!
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Feb 8, 2019 02:39
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Just remembered the worst gig that I played was opening for a reasonably successful national deathcore band in a regional town to an audience of 12 people. We were friends with every band on the bill including the headliner so we just figured let's get hosed up and bro down and just have a fun evening even if the crowd sucks. During our set my vocalist encouraged a couple of the audience members to set up a small table and chairs right in front to watch the set (because lol) and then somehow manages to fall off the front monitor, partially onto the table and then on the floor and just kinda lies there, so I walk over and start headbanging over him to annoy him until he very quietly asks into the mic (mid-blastbeat) "could someone please call an ambulance". The guy had managed to dislocate his knee somehow and so the show gets put on hold while we wait 45 minutes for the town's one ambulance to arrive, all the while he's sitting in front of the stage propped up on a chair because he can't move without being in even more agonising pain. Ambulance arrives and shoots him full of morphine and I was very happy to see his pain visibly melt away, and as he got wheeled out on a stretcher he just leans back with a big glazed opiate smile and throws the biggest  and everyone loses it.Kudos to the guy he played the next day's show in a wheelchair with only minor impacts to his stage moves. Recovering from knee surgery sucked for the guy though, he was cooked on painkillers for the next three months and developed a weird phobia of trees as a result (I know).
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Feb 8, 2019 03:37
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I have nothing like those stories, but to be fair I haven't played in bands that much since high school, and for the ones I've played in since then we've actually had our poo poo together. When I was in high school though, holy poo poo finding a reliable guitarist was a nightmare. I've had more than one show where the guitarist flaked out at the last minute so we had to find someone else. The worst was definitely a school battle of the bands type thing, where 1. we had to find a new guitarist at the last minute, 2. because of that, and because we were playing in drop D, he and myself (bassist) weren't tuned to each other and 3. the drum set wasn't well set up so the drummer had to stop for a couple of measures in the middle of the song because the kick drum had slid forward and he had to pull it back. Needless to say we did pretty poorly. Oh well, nothing in the 15 years since has ever come close to that trainwreck.
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Feb 8, 2019 07:47
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Concatenation posted:Just remembered the worst gig that I played was opening for a reasonably successful national deathcore band in a regional town to an audience of 12 people. We were friends with every band on the bill including the headliner so we just figured let's get hosed up and bro down and just have a fun evening even if the crowd sucks. That poo poo is hilarious and doesn't sound like a hellgig at all.
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Feb 8, 2019 08:00
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I didn't play a lot of gigs, but I count the good ones against the rest. I think I had one breakout awesome gig and even it had issues. The rest were bad to awful. I could write a very long brochure about why, but there's not much new there. I would like to do it but  .P.S. - I'm working on my pics of the new JEM7V and I know you all can't wait to see them.
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Feb 8, 2019 08:29
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Actually, the very first show I ever played might qualify as a hellgig too. I was 18 and got booked to play my solo material (the only time I've ever played a solo show) on the same bill as one of my favorite local bands. It was my first time ever being on stage in that sort of capacity and it was just me alone up there and I was loving terrified. I also hadn't practiced nearly as much as I should have, so I just kinda winged it. This was before I even knew what a sequencer was or how to use it, so I was up there on stage with a laptop with Reason on it and a MIDI controller just doing everything on the fly. I don't know if any of y'all have heard my early solo material (as Aetherius), but it involves several tracks playing at once, so imagine me being terrified and trying to trigger a bunch of different tracks in my DAW from the pads on my MIDI controller at the exact right moment hahaha I was sure I had hosed the whole thing up, but after I was done, several people came up to me and said they really enjoyed it and appreciated me bringing electronic-ish music to a venue that was traditionally mostly metal, punk/hardcore and ska, so that calmed me down a lot at the time. I'm glad no video of that show exists though, or if it does, I haven't seen it and hope I never do. I joined the band I played with for years like 6 months after that and I found playing shows with them to be totally fine. Having 4 other guys on stage with me helped alleviate my performance anxiety a lot. I loving hate being the center of attention, so I don't know why I even agreed to play that solo show. But a handful of people seemed to really enjoy it, so I guess it wasn't the worst idea I've ever had 
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Feb 8, 2019 09:02
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Krustic posted:I love long texty posts especially when I’m board at work. Having a gun pointed at you counts as a hell gig in my book. A hellgig thread would be cool. Thanks for sharing.
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Feb 8, 2019 09:11
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gently caress Your Website posted:Hellgig thread seems like a winner idea to me for sure, someone start it 
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Feb 8, 2019 18:45
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Dang It Bhabhi! posted:I’m in a couple Kemper groups because I find the users to be hilarious. They have recently been complaining about the resale value of their beloved sacred objects. likewise i can't believe nobody's biting on my 5 year old dell optiplex
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Feb 8, 2019 19:00
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