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It gets soft enough that staying in is hard. It's a shame because we both love it. I'll buy a cock ring, thanks!
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Feb 18, 2019 18:33
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I'd suggest the link I posted in my second to last post on the previous page. Unless you're particularly well-endowed in the girth department (or have a micropenis) one of the four should fit. e: also give some nitric oxide precursor ammino acids a try - l-arginine or l-citrulline. Both turn into NO via the urea cycle, which the body uses as a vasodialator. The latter (citrulline) has been found to be an effective treatment option for men diagnosed with moderate ED symptoms. Geoj fucked around with this message at 20:45 on Feb 18, 2019 |
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Feb 18, 2019 19:50
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Geoj posted:I'd suggest the link I posted in my second to last post on the previous page. That's interesting, I'll check out those supplements too. I certainly hope it's not the start of something worse  I'm pretty sure I've had more or less that my whole life. At least it's the only position it happens in. It's not a big thing in the grand scheme, but just that induces feelings of shame. I can't imagine having your whole junk stop working.
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Feb 18, 2019 22:21
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It's probably nothing. You're likely used to having it a certain way, or maybe something about the position is cramping your style, like say a person bouncing on your bladder.
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Feb 18, 2019 22:38
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Could be psychosomatic too - you went limp once in that position, so now there's a mental block when you try again.
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Feb 19, 2019 03:25
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Colonel J posted:Is it common to have trouble staying hard in certain positions? Reverse cowgirl eventually gets me soft, and it's not for lack of excitation, it just happens. Could it be a case of how pressure is distributed differently?
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Feb 19, 2019 03:27
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bowmore posted:that could be dangerous Go on...
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Feb 19, 2019 04:59
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Colonel J posted:Go on...
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Feb 19, 2019 08:32
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Does anyone have any experience with inner labia piercings + penetrative sex? Do rings placed further back (more toward the perineum) get in the way? Any other issues to be aware of?
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Feb 19, 2019 18:19
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If you have sort of a hook-shaped penis you need to be careful when pulling out.
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Feb 19, 2019 18:21
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I was with a lady with labia piercings for a long time, the only issue we found is you needed to be careful on first insertion, but they weren't much of an issue beyond that.Biomute posted:If you have sort of a hook-shaped penis you need to be careful when pulling out. 
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Feb 19, 2019 21:56
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hoobajoo posted:I was with a lady with labia piercings for a long time, the only issue we found is you needed to be careful on first insertion, but they weren't much of an issue beyond that. Alright, good to know. Thanks.
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Feb 20, 2019 00:43
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Colonel J posted:That's interesting, I'll check out those supplements too. I certainly hope it's not the start of something worse I've had some issues maintaining with just the normal "on top" positioning. It started making me wonder about circulation and what not since I've had 0 issues in any other position with the same reaction/results. Let me know if/how you solve it.
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Feb 22, 2019 16:14
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To spin off the discussion about silicon..... Any input on those ‘Make a replica of your own dong’ kits? My hubby & I have joked about trying to make a cast of him for me to tske when I travel, but we’re apparently legitimately interested. But we’re reading a lot of crap about how well they do, (in addition to obvious issues of staying hard during the cure time too). Good products? Products to avoid? (Not interested in anything with an insertable vibrator, just a good ole fashioned dildo).
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Feb 24, 2019 01:41
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bowmore posted:well if you are semi-hard then your dick could slip out and your partner could just smash into your dick (which could fracture it depending on how hard she loving) Yeah that’s especially a risk with reverse cowgirl, also she could pop you with the motion of her hips if you’re trying to get her to ride you harder. Better safe than sorry in my mind. When that happens to me I usually just pull out and switch positions. Also I get paranoid enough about it that my boner just totally disappears at that point anyway so we have to switch things up.
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Mar 7, 2019 19:37
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Madbullogna posted:To spin off the discussion about silicon..... They're very difficult to use and the end result is inferior to most off the shelf options. Maybe you can think of how he picked it out for you instead of it being exactly him. Or he could stuff it in his underwear for a weekend day so it's fragranced. At this time I'd again like to endorse Vixen, especially their Vixskin line. Just please, please avoid jelly at all cost unless you want to use a condom every time.
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Mar 7, 2019 20:09
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Doorknob Slobber posted:best apps/websites for a married couple to find a third woman to hook up/date? Feeld Quiver Fetlife You’re gonna want to pay for the first two. It’s not going to be impossible to find a unicorn but it’ll be way harder than finding other couples, so bear that in mind. And it’s way likelier that you’ll hook up with a single woman than form a long-term arrangement, but you never know. Do you or your spouse have any friends you might broach this with? Are you prepared to possibly lose them as friends when you’re done? You may be waiting a long time if you exclusively want that ideal unicorn and you don’t have any leads.
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Mar 8, 2019 01:45
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This is embarrassing but it's less embarrassing than speaking to a doc about it: girlfriend gets very wet, but because I'm circumcised (I think? driest dick in Europe), initially entering can be difficult unless we use spit. Are there any lubes you would recommend? Preferably something that doesn't have a taste and doesn't turn into a sticky mess. 2nd issue is my girlfriend is way, way shorter than me, and I can't wrap my head around positions that would work. We just keep resorting to doggy style cause it's easiest but I prefer being close, but any positions that let me do that are either awkward because of our height difference, or hard to maintain. I don't really like the fact that every time we have sex, I'm flipping her around instead of being close to her. Lastly, the most embarrassing part of this is I can't actually climax no matter how hard I try, it's loving me up psychologically. When I'm by myself, I can stay hard easily. When I'm with her, I dunno if it's just cause I'm overthinking / anxious / whatever, but it can be hard to stay hard and I just can't climax and it's sorta making her and me feel bad. Actual penetrative sex doesn't feel that good (it only feels nicest entering and pulling out), and she feels awful when I don't climax and instead go down and finish her. At first, she'd just sorta take it in her stride, but it keeps on happening and I'm having a difficult time casually brushing it off like it's no big deal. Would different positions feel better? I can't even finish beside her when I'm doing it myself. I'm the most anally retentive person in existence, so I wouldn't be surprised if it's a psychological thing that's ruining it all, but I have no idea how to stop it from happening. Definitely not digging this emasculating feeling, what kind of a man can't finish when he's with someone he finds extremely attractive? And it's irritating in the sense that I'm constantly in the mood cause I can't actually climax, so we're missing out on all that cute post-climax good feelings, and it probably gets a bit tedious for her when I'm constantly turned on. Qubee fucked around with this message at 11:41 on Mar 11, 2019 |
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Mar 11, 2019 11:35
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If you can stay hard while masturbating and lose it during intercourse, sounds like you should take a break from wanking it. Especially so if you can't come during the horizontal tango. No 'death grip' for awhile, my friend! As for lubes, maybe coconut oil? It's not sticky and stays slick for a good amount of time. It does taste of coconuts, though, so not sure how well that vibes with the non-flavoured request. If the problem is just not getting it on the bed/sheets or whatever, I'd recommend just having a sexy towel or something that you put down before or during the dirty.
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Mar 11, 2019 12:24
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The secret is pillows.
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Mar 11, 2019 12:38
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Johnny Truant posted:If you can stay hard while masturbating and lose it during intercourse, sounds like you should take a break from wanking it. Especially so if you can't come during the horizontal tango. No 'death grip' for awhile, my friend! I thought it might be deathgrip related but I can finish even if I use a really really light grip. The advice of taking a break from jerkin the gherkin is sound though, may as well try it. Coconut oil seems interesting (she is also crazy about coconut), but a quick Google says because of it's antibacterial and antifungal properties, it can funk with the natural vaginal balance. Turtlicious posted:The secret is pillows. Please share your wisdom. How do I use pillows. Use it to prop her back up? If I'm trying to go at it missionary, her hips being raised will still leave me with the "I'm way too tall and my chest is smacking into her face" issue.
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Mar 11, 2019 13:38
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14in taller than my SO here, can recommend spooning as a position of choice. Being so much taller is actually an asset then as it's easier to kiss/nibble ears/whatever else you want to do with your heads near each other instead of your face being somewhere down their back. And you're close and snuggly and all that good stuff. Alternatively, get her on top (if she's into it.) Especially if you sit up when she's straddling you, again you're looking at a good face-to-face situation where if she was taller you'd have a face full of boob (no bad thing.) If you're feeling super athletic, do the above and then stand up/pick her up. Use a wall for support if needed.
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Mar 11, 2019 14:22
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Qubee posted:This is embarrassing but it's less embarrassing than speaking to a doc about it: girlfriend gets very wet, but because I'm circumcised (I think? driest dick in Europe), initially entering can be difficult unless we use spit. Are there any lubes you would recommend? Preferably something that doesn't have a taste and doesn't turn into a sticky mess. 2nd issue is my girlfriend is way, way shorter than me, and I can't wrap my head around positions that would work. We just keep resorting to doggy style cause it's easiest but I prefer being close, but any positions that let me do that are either awkward because of our height difference, or hard to maintain. I don't really like the fact that every time we have sex, I'm flipping her around instead of being close to her. I had the same problem and found that uberlube was by far the best lube I've used. Doesn't get sticky and we rarely feel like there's a need to re-lubricate As for the ejaculation problem, had the same problem there and it made me feel like poo poo. What helped me was relaxing the death grip and watching less porn, it didn't "cure" me but it is a less of a problem now. Also not worrying too much about it helps, sex isn't just about orgasming, so don't get too obsessed with that part.
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Mar 11, 2019 15:16
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Qubee posted:Coconut oil seems interesting (she is also crazy about coconut), but a quick Google says because of it's antibacterial and antifungal properties, it can funk with the natural vaginal balance. This is a massive case of YMMV. My wife and I switched from using silicone lube to coconut oil about four years ago, mainly as a cost-cutting measure and because its easier to clean up afterwards and she's never had any issues. OTOH if your girlfriend gets a yeast infection at the drop of a hat you may want to steer clear.
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Mar 11, 2019 15:45
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Qubee posted:This is embarrassing but it's less embarrassing than speaking to a doc about it: girlfriend gets very wet, but because I'm circumcised (I think? driest dick in Europe), initially entering can be difficult unless we use spit. Are there any lubes you would recommend? Preferably something that doesn't have a taste and doesn't turn into a sticky mess. 2nd issue is my girlfriend is way, way shorter than me, and I can't wrap my head around positions that would work. We just keep resorting to doggy style cause it's easiest but I prefer being close, but any positions that let me do that are either awkward because of our height difference, or hard to maintain. I don't really like the fact that every time we have sex, I'm flipping her around instead of being close to her. Literally just stop beating off and watching porn. You'll be fine in two weeks. Don't loving masturbate. Get over the urges, and they will transform you into a healthy sex haver. Goodluck. Been through it myself with my girlfriend. Everything works fine now. Don't give up.
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Mar 11, 2019 18:44
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Abstaining from masturbation should work after 24-36 hours, especially if you usually do it daily or multiple times per day. Unless you're waaaaaay far down the rabbit hole re: death grip and porn addiction, but I would think if you're doing the deed but can't close a day or two of abstaining should reset your system.
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Mar 11, 2019 18:53
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Geoj posted:Abstaining from masturbation should work after 24-36 hours, especially if you usually do it daily or multiple times per day. Yeah the further down the rabbit hole, the longer it will take to "reset" your system. Regardless, if you give a poo poo, don't just stop for a day or two.
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Mar 11, 2019 19:54
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I've had similar issues and just stopping porn for a month reset me. I didn't even need to stop jerkin it, so it wasn't too bad. YMMV of course.
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Mar 11, 2019 19:55
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Geoj posted:Abstaining from masturbation should work after 24-36 hours, especially if you usually do it daily or multiple times per day. If memory serves, when it comes to "building up reserves" there's no point abstaining for longer than three days under any circumstance. Recovering sensitivity is different, of course.
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Mar 11, 2019 20:01
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Does your testosterone not peak 5-6 days after abstaining? I could be totally wrong.
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Mar 11, 2019 20:07
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Kazvall posted:Does your testosterone not peak 5-6 days after abstaining? I could be totally wrong. I think the average is closer to 4.5
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Mar 11, 2019 20:28
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Also if you really need some outside source to help you, OTC male enhancement pills actually work pretty drat well. But that's moreso in maintaining an erection and not in the not being able to cum part.
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Mar 11, 2019 20:30
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Kazvall posted:Also if you really need some outside source to help you, OTC male enhancement pills actually work pretty drat well. But that's moreso in maintaining an erection and not in the not being able to cum part. Ummm, exactly which ones are you describing? Because if it’s supplements or herbal poo poo or whatever gets advertised on porn sites, isn’t that stuff like all uniformly bullshit? Like, I could see something like a vasodilator like Viagra, etc working if the issue were getting and staying hard, but are there actually viable alternatives at this point? I’m actually legit curious and not just looking to dunk on this or anything.
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Mar 11, 2019 21:49
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Electric Bugaloo posted:Ummm, exactly which ones are you describing? Because if it’s supplements or herbal poo poo or whatever gets advertised on porn sites, isn’t that stuff like all uniformly bullshit? Amino acids that increase the amount of nitric oxide in the blood, such as l-arginine, help blood vessels relax and also improve circulation. When combined with other supplements that help the absorption of these or ones that increase libido, etc, you can actually see quite a powerful effect. I have a bottle of irwin's natural steel libido regular and steel libido red. When taken together I've noticed not only getting hard quicker, but being harder overall, and also being incredibly horny at the same time. I dunno, ymmv but it helped me in a time where I thought I needed it or it would help me get over the performance anxiety associated with not being able to cum from penetrative sex. I no longer am taking it, since it's not really needed. But I have it just in case. .
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Mar 11, 2019 22:24
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^ I bought a bottle of the red over the weekend after running out of my usual supplement (citrulline, which it contains) and found it to be highly effective, if a touch expensive. Electric Bugaloo posted:Ummm, exactly which ones are you describing? Because if it’s supplements or herbal poo poo or whatever gets advertised on porn sites, isn’t that stuff like all uniformly bullshit? I've personally used l-arginine and l-citrulline to great effect - although to be fair I'm in my mid-30s, efficacy may vary with age. The latter (citrulline) has been found to be an effective treatment for men diagnosed with moderate ED, and is more effective than arginine due to higher bioavailability. Your body turns it into arginine and eventually to NO as part of th urea cycle. Geoj fucked around with this message at 22:37 on Mar 11, 2019 |
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Mar 11, 2019 22:32
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Anecdotally, taking l-citruline noticably helps my D do well after being on SSRIs for years. None of this is really related to death grip or overuse of porn, since those are more psychological problems, but yeah.
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Mar 11, 2019 22:34
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Hey guys I got out of a 5 year relationship a few months ago and I’m at the point dating-wise now where I might be going to bed with people. My issue is that I can’t seem to make condoms work for me at the moment. I feel like I’ve never had a good sexual experience wearing condoms. When I was younger I honestly didn’t have relatively many experiences with them/having penetrative sex in general but when I did I had difficulty staying hard and climaxing. Either I’d get overstimulated and climax too soon or I’d go for ever and eventually get soft/feel the latex bind against me and get soft, etc. I’m uncircumcised but I’ve lived in the US my whole life. I don’t have phimosis or restricted movement, and on the spectrum of ‘tighter’ vs ‘looser’ regarding foreskin, I’m probably on the ‘looser’ end of things. Discomfort for me during sex is likelier to come from the skin getting accidentally rolled or caught and pinched than from something like head hypersensitivity or whatever. During unprotected sex I’ve noticed that I tend to be most comfortable when it can move around as it pleases, for lack of a better term. I’ve been doing a fair amount of research into condom types and how to wear them and I’m feeling dejected at just how mixed the quality of information I’ve found on this issue is. Given the relatively global appeal of sex I’m actually surprised. Maybe I’m very confused and dumb but I think I’m seeing differing accounts of what a “proper” fit should look like. Some accounts seem to say that the skin should be retracted and held in place there by the condom. Others seem to suggest that the skin should be retracted during application but also free and able to move about under the condom (and suggest flared-end models for that purpose). And yet others seem to imply that a good condom should ensheath your entire foreskin on both sides and I guess move with it like some sort of foreskin glove (like I guess imagine a latex epidermis over your real one)? I legitimately don’t know which is correct (that last one seems wrong) and what that means in terms of buying myself the right prophylactic. I’m aware that most drugstore condoms available in the US might not fit me the best and I’m open to looking at alternatives, be they international, special brands, stuff available at sex stores/online, whatever. I’m open. My ex and I had been really close friends before getting together, so we kind of blazed through the ‘using condoms all the time’ period of our relationship in under a month, got tested, got an IUD, shacked up, and never looked back for five years. Over that time I was extremely happy with my sex life and performance. I dunno what would’ve happened had, say, my ex and I spent much more time having sex with condoms but I’m kind of scared that I won’t be able to make the same kind of positive impression with someone new. Trying things out now on my own I’m finding them uncomfortable and I’m having similar difficulty staying hard, granted I’ve been sort of awkwardly experimenting with this on my own. You don’t have to convince me of why condoms are good and smart. I just want to find a brand or a methodology that works for me and doesn’t make me dread the prospect of having to wear one or possibly embarrassing myself with somebody due to performance issues. If that also means potentially addressing mental or emotional stuff around anxiety/staying hard I’m game to address those too. TLDR: I wanna have good sex with condoms and right now I feel like I can’t.
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Mar 11, 2019 22:49
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Put a lil lube inside that condom my friend!  
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Mar 11, 2019 23:02
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black.lion posted:Put a lil lube inside that condom my friend! Yeah, but like what’s supposed to happen? Is stuff supposed to move around in there? Should it be held all snug like I’m wearing a compression bib on my johnson? Should it stay pulled back, tight, and outta sight?
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Mar 11, 2019 23:26
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Kazvall posted:When taken together I've noticed not only getting hard quicker, but being harder overall, and also being incredibly horny at the same time. I dunno, ymmv but it helped me in a time where I thought I needed it or it would help me get over the performance anxiety associated with not being able to cum from penetrative sex. I no longer am taking it, since it's not really needed. But I have it just in case. I've got some opti-men multivitamins that have some of those stuff you're talking about and I definitely notice a difference. When I don't take them, I can go days without thinking of masturbating. When I'm on them, every day is a struggle. I don't suffer from deathgrip (I can get off with a really light touch), so it's most likely just a case of "quit watching porn and jerking it so much you fuckin degenerate". Been in the single life for too long, so should probs break that habit. I think a large part of it is mental as well, I get so caught up in my own headspace and worry about just going with the flow. Just got back from her place, we had a big heart to heart about my issue (cause surprise surprise it happened again). I told her I feel really bad when I know it'll take me ages to climax so I just prefer not to try (it loving sucks feeling yourself go limp and then having a difficult time getting it up again) and she hit me with some logic and kindness that was 100% fair. She said "how would you feel if I stopped you every time from making me finish because I thought it'd take too long?" and she assured me she wouldn't mind taking an hour to help me get off. I reckon I struck gold, cause previous partners have never been this considerate or caring. I've had to physically stop her from going down on me cause after 10 minutes, I just start to feel bad thinking it's not enjoyable for her at that point, and exes used to hit me with the "how long will this take? are you almost there?" and then eventually give up. She's a trooper and tells me to suck a dick before continuing. Totally unrelated note: I'm not sure if it's cyclical and women just taste different / smell different during different periods of their cycle, or if it could be an indication of something going wrong. I've been with my current gf for just over a month, and she used to taste amazing and it was fine (she's on the pill). But just before her period and just after, she's gotten a sort of funky, unpleasant taste and strong smell. I don't want to say anything, and I soldier through it, but it makes me focus more on her clit instead of using my tongue all over her down there. Will she go back to tasting how she did when she was in the middle of her cycle? Should I just keep my mouth shut about it so I don't hurt her feelings? I managed a 4 year relationship with my ex and she always tasted and smelled awful down there, and my experience is pretty limited. So is this the norm? PS: thanks a bunch to everyone coming out of the woodwork and making me realise I'm not broken or dysfunctional and this is actually a very common occurrence. Has made me feel less poo poo about this whole situation. Was legitimately gonna go to the docs and see about getting my testosterone levels checked, that's how hosed up this situation had me lol Qubee fucked around with this message at 01:21 on Mar 12, 2019 |
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Mar 12, 2019 01:03
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