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Traxis
Jul 2, 2006

how is paying to have sex with a literal slave only a misdemeanor jesus christ america is hosed

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Tim Whatley
Mar 28, 2010

I hope it's Andy Reid, who is physically a bigger name

Marshal Prolapse
Jun 23, 2012

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Traxis posted:

how is paying to have sex with a literal slave only a misdemeanor jesus christ america is hosed

Because the charge is only for solicitation. There are a poo poo ton of other charges to cover that.

sweet thursday
Sep 16, 2012

If you were a billionaire and you decided you wanted your full-time, 40 hour a week job to be giving away all your money, then you could give away 200 dollars a minute and be at that career for 40 years.

Shimrra Jamaane
Aug 10, 2007

Obscure to all except those well-versed in Yuuzhan Vong lore.

Traxis posted:

how is paying to have sex with a literal slave only a misdemeanor jesus christ america is hosed

Because sex workers are treated harsher by the justice system than the Johns soliciting them.

indigi
Jul 20, 2004

how can we not talk about family
when family's all that we got?

Shimrra Jamaane posted:

Because sex workers are treated harsher by the justice system than the Johns soliciting them.

word

Tim Whatley posted:

I hope it's Andy Reid, who is physically a bigger name

this would make me sad but the video of him waddling into the parlor would be funnier

sweet thursday
Sep 16, 2012

Shimrra Jamaane posted:

Because sex workers are treated harsher by the justice system than the Johns soliciting them.

There's a reason why most of America's worst serial killers got high numbers because they preyed mostly on prostitutes.

"We had 5 dead prostitutes here we didn't think to connect. There were 20 to 30 prostitutes in the neighboring area that were found dead in the same manner, but they were in different counties, so, we didn't really hear about them. Listen, these women are transient. " - police officers after every major serial killer discovery

Chinatown
Sep 11, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
Fun Shoe

sweet thursday posted:

If you were a billionaire and you decided you wanted your full-time, 40 hour a week job to be giving away all your money, then you could give away 200 dollars a minute and be at that career for 40 years.

its actually substantially longer considering you are accruing interest on your money

sweet thursday
Sep 16, 2012

Chinatown posted:

its actually substantially longer considering you are accruing interest on your money

That's what you live on. Work-life balance, man

You could give a way 200 dollars a minute for 40 years as a career and still be considered one of the wealthiest Americans based on living off of interest alone XD. Man the world is hosed

Diva Cupcake
Aug 15, 2005

https://twitter.com/RyanHannable/status/1099024431735816192

Quiet Feet
Dec 14, 2009

THE HELL IS WITH THIS ASS!?





Bob Kraft is innocent. He doesn't even have a penis, just a tiny speaker that let's out the sad Price is Right music when he unzips.

Vengarr
Jun 17, 2010

Smashed before noon

sweet thursday posted:

That's what you live on. Work-life balance, man

You could give a way 200 dollars a minute for 40 years as a career and still be considered one of the wealthiest Americans based on living off of interest alone XD. Man the world is hosed

Handjob creators

Shimrra Jamaane
Aug 10, 2007

Obscure to all except those well-versed in Yuuzhan Vong lore.

Why aren’t they releasing the names already?

sweet thursday
Sep 16, 2012


That seems to be a big investigation with a lot of personnel hours involved. Why was that the magic number "Okay, 200 men now fits a pattern. Let's save these women"

Comfortador
Jul 31, 2003

Just give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have.

Wait...wait.

I worry what you just heard was...
"Give me a lot of b4con_n_3ggs."

What I said was...
"Give me all the 3ggs_n_b4con you have"

...Do you understand?

Shimrra Jamaane posted:

Why aren’t they releasing the names already?

They're too busy coming...

Ehud
Sep 19, 2003

football.

Shimrra Jamaane posted:

Why aren’t they releasing the names already?

drama!!

fartknocker
Oct 28, 2012


Damn it, this always happens. I think I'm gonna score, and then I never score. It's not fair.



Wedge Regret
Somewhere, Jerry Jones orders a lackey to pay Throatzilla another $15,000 to keep quiet about his regular Tuesday afternoon ‘hernia exams’.

Dr_Strangelove
Dec 16, 2003

Mein Fuhrer! THEY WON!

wandler20 posted:

The Panthers new owner seems decent.

Oh, I don't know...

sweet thursday
Sep 16, 2012

Ehud posted:

drama!!

Police officers run their media conferences and evidence reveals like producers on RuPaul's Drag Race

Groovelord Neato
Dec 6, 2014


https://twitter.com/cushbomb/status/1099025732573978625

Impossibly Perfect Sphere
Nov 6, 2002

They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!

sweet thursday posted:

Police officers run their media conferences and evidence reveals like producers on RuPaul's Drag Race

We've called these two celebrities here today because one of them is guilty of solicitation. Please stop forward... *dramatic pause*
COMMERCIAL BREAK

Shimrra Jamaane
Aug 10, 2007

Obscure to all except those well-versed in Yuuzhan Vong lore.
Kraft should be thankful that he’s one of literally hundreds caught up in this.

barnold
Dec 16, 2011


what do u do when yuo're born to play fps? guess there's nothing left to do but play fps. boom headshot

Shimrra Jamaane posted:

Why aren’t they releasing the names already?

these are Florida cops we're talking about. just pure lol if you didn't think they would hijack something of this magnitude to make it the biggest circus possible.

Android Apocalypse
Apr 28, 2009

The future is
AUTOMATED
and you are
OBSOLETE

Illegal Hen
To all those wondering why Kraft would go to a $50 massage parlor instead of importing expensive hookers: do you think billionaires become rich by spending as much money as possible? They become rich by nickel & dimeing those they wish to exploit.

That said, I'm waiting to hear the names from the other massage parlors from other states. Watch the sting operation catch all NFL owners on the East Coast.

Fifty Three
Oct 29, 2007

Chinatown posted:

its actually substantially longer considering you are accruing interest on your money
I did some quick lovely maths on this- it's actually forever, if you assume > ~2.5% ROI each year. If you want to live on a cool $1mil per year while giving away your money, you only need to crack 2.6%.

Fifty Three fucked around with this message at 20:47 on Feb 22, 2019

SKULL.GIF
Jan 20, 2017


barnold
Dec 16, 2011


what do u do when yuo're born to play fps? guess there's nothing left to do but play fps. boom headshot
a few years ago there was a massive sting in Massachusetts for rub & tugs and one of them was in my town. i'm already prepared for all the storylines

Darth Brooks
Jan 15, 2005

I do not wear this mask to protect me. I wear it to protect you from me.


Gotta stop and pick up some bagels on the way.

DariusLikewise
Oct 4, 2008

You wore that on Halloween?
Imagine being the secret service guy that has to watch over Trump while he gets a rub and tug

Impossibly Perfect Sphere
Nov 6, 2002

They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!
Make sure you check out the Google reviews for Orchid of Asia Day Spa.

sweet thursday
Sep 16, 2012

DariusLikewise posted:

Imagine being the secret service guy that has to watch over Trump while he gets a rub and tug

"Look me in the eyes, Chuck. Look at me! Don't look away. Call me Mr. President, Chucky. Call me it."

kiimo
Jul 24, 2003

Has this been posted

https://www.yelp.com/biz_photos/orchids-of-asia-day-spa-jupiter


Asproigerosis
Mar 13, 2013

insufferable

MazelTovCocktail posted:

Library funding issue aside Jeffery Lurie is pretty good.

except his mail order vietnamese sex slave!

Kevlar v2.0
Dec 25, 2003

=^•⩊•^=

Shimrra Jamaane posted:

Why aren’t they releasing the names already?

They gotta figure out how many Mar-a-lago regulars to redact

Impossibly Perfect Sphere
Nov 6, 2002

They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!
A legit review from two months ago.

quote:

I had to walk out half way through. At first, the masseuse was doing a lovely job and I was enjoying it, but it soon turned out to be the most horrendous experience for massage. She asked me to pay beforehand - and like someone else said, this should've been a huge red flag but I was a Walk-In and they were able to do it right away (should've been another alarm), so I tried to put minor irritations aside. However, about 10 mins into the massage the doorbell kept ringing from mail men or staff going in and out. It's the Big Ben, 8-count "Ding Dong Ding Dong, Ding Dong Ding Dong" type so impossible to ignore. The phone rings constantly and then you can hear the manager shout back in Asian. At some point, the manager began to shout questions to my attendant through the door and this went on for about 4 mins - not kidding! Eventually the door opened for them to continue a discussion with me lying there half naked and barely covered. My attendant left the room. When 'she' came back, I realized the hands on me now weren't the same as before. These hands didn't feel like a qualified masseuse. So when THIS attendant left the room to answer the phone again, leaving the door open (!), I sat up, had to wait for them to return to tell them I wasn't going to put up with this any longer. The manager told me she'd refund my c card payment, then pretended to not know how to do it up front as I stood there, fed up. When I threatened to call my bank and have the charge contested, she suddenly remembered how. Funny how that goes. Stay away. Someone shut this place down and let these girls go work somewhere else. I have to add that I WAS having a good massage, but obviously this place is being ran into the ground by bad management. Note: When you enter, look at the manager's face... you'll see stress in her eyes. I should've listened to my gut when I noticed that. Better still, someone should perhaps investigate this business to check these girls are being paid and not slaves. Something fishy here...

Impossibly Perfect Sphere
Nov 6, 2002

They wasted Luanne on Lucky!

She could of have been so much more but the writers just didn't care!
BAHAHAHAHHAHA

quote:

My aunt went to take me on the last day of my vacation for a much needed massage, my first one! She had a gift certificate and when she went to pay the front desk they said it was not valid it was from the "old owners" vs the "new owners". When my aunt explained she had spoken to someone earlier who confirmed she could use the gift certificate, the response was the owner was in China and the front desk girl does not understand English it's not her fault. Needless to say we asked where the customer was and there was no answer. We walked out and I never got my massage! When we told some friends what had happened we found out this place is a rub and tug. Eww

sweet thursday
Sep 16, 2012

That's the thing. Everyone local to an area knows a rub n tug is a rub n tug. I'm sure Kraft knows all the spots in his neighborhood and was smart enough to stay away from them. Why did he think flying to the bottom half of the country and doing obvious poo poo there would turn out any different?

Tell me again why he is worth so much for his supposed decision making and leadership capabilities?

AsInHowe
Jan 11, 2007

red winged angel

Jiminy Christmas! Shoes! posted:

A legit review from two months ago.

quote:

It's the Big Ben

Oil!
Nov 5, 2008

Der's e'rl in dem der hills!


Ham Wrangler
Bring's a whole new meaning to Kraft services.

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indigi
Jul 20, 2004

how can we not talk about family
when family's all that we got?

yeah for a second I was waiting for it to turn into a joke review

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