OSHA: definitely bent in the straight places

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > OSHA: definitely bent in the straight places

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Splicer: Oct 16, 2006; from hell's heart I cast at thee
🧙🐀🧹🌙🪄🐸

Cojawfee posted:

It sprays a fresh coat of paint all over the ship just before the Admiral shows up.

It boops the hull and pops up a little flag saying "good job!"

# ? Apr 3, 2019 10:21

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# ? May 29, 2024 22:26

That Dang Lizard: Jul 13, 2016; what; an idiomt

Humphreys posted:

In this case looks like the back fell off.

It's a good thing the ocean is outside of the environment.

# ? Apr 3, 2019 10:33

Cable Guy: Jul 18, 2005; I don't expect any trouble, but we'll be handing these out later...; Slippery Tilde

Cojawfee posted:

It sprays a fresh coat of paint all over the ship just before the Admiral shows up.

# ? Apr 3, 2019 10:59

Splicer: Oct 16, 2006; from hell's heart I cast at thee
🧙🐀🧹🌙🪄🐸

Cable Guy posted:

Buffalo bullet bill

# ? Apr 3, 2019 11:52

Lazyhound: Mar 1, 2004; A squid eating dough in a polyethylene bag is fast and bulbous—got me?

# ? Apr 3, 2019 11:53

Zopotantor: Feb 24, 2013; ...und ist er drin dann lassen wir ihn niemals wieder raus...

El_Elegante posted:

If they�re just chaps they won�t protect you from a chainsaw penectomy.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y6zPlk7drac

# ? Apr 3, 2019 12:22

EKDS5k: Feb 22, 2012; THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU LET YOUR BEER FREEZE, DAMNIT

Oh yeah, I've seen these. It's like a wood chipper that can reach out and grab you! Fortunately I'm in the habit of pretending that any machine operator is actively trying to kill me, and I stand appropriately.

And the excavator mounted chippers are actually way safer since the operator doesn't have to be anywhere near it, let alone feed it by hand.

# ? Apr 3, 2019 13:57

Mr. Apollo: Nov 8, 2000

https://i.imgur.com/ZGHS7DM.mp4

# ? Apr 3, 2019 13:59

Humphreys: Jan 26, 2013; We conceived a way to use my mother as a porn mule

How the 50's tried to kill Britain (not exclusively):

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EauvwU2iWFI

# ? Apr 3, 2019 14:00

Asmodai_00: Nov 26, 2007

Mr. Apollo posted:

https://i.imgur.com/ZGHS7DM.mp4

been there

# ? Apr 3, 2019 14:22

Evilreaver: Feb 26, 2007; GEORGE IS GETTIN' AUGMENTED!; Dinosaur Gum

evil_bunnY posted:

\
Add a zero

turn off your monitor

# ? Apr 3, 2019 15:42

Splicer: Oct 16, 2006; from hell's heart I cast at thee
🧙🐀🧹🌙🪄🐸

Mr. Apollo posted:

https://i.imgur.com/ZGHS7DM.mp4

You think the enema's impressive, wait until you see what he does with the hydrant

# ? Apr 3, 2019 15:55

AFewBricksShy: Jun 19, 2003; of a full load.

Splicer posted:

You think the enema's impressive, wait until you see what he does with the hydrant

# ? Apr 3, 2019 15:58

Trabant: Nov 26, 2011; All systems nominal.

Stupid_Sexy_Flander posted:

I really want to own a lathe, but I know without a doubt it will end up somehow kill me or at least make me wish I was dead.

Some tools you are just scared of, and when you research accidents involving them, you realize it's common goddamn sense.

I took a chance on one and survived. I treat it like a rattlesnake though, so... yeah, having a good dose of fearespect right off the bat is a smart thing.

Honestly, you're already better qualified to own one than a thousand people who went on YouTube, saw Carl Jacobson and Mike Waldt, and said "Pshhh, I can do that."

# ? Apr 3, 2019 16:00

Rent-A-Cop: Oct 15, 2004; I posted my food for USPOL Thanksgiving!

evil_bunnY posted:

ASW is a thing that exists.

Nuclear ASROC is the proest of pro-ship torpedos.

# ? Apr 3, 2019 16:22

BMan: Oct 31, 2015; KNIIIIIIFE
EEEEEYYYYE
ATTAAAACK

evil_bunnY posted:

Add a zero

hellfires aren't THAT expensive

# ? Apr 3, 2019 16:49

BMan: Oct 31, 2015; KNIIIIIIFE
EEEEEYYYYE
ATTAAAACK

Splicer posted:

Say up a camera for humour and also rental insurance.

This is not a joke.

Also post about it in the bad with money thread if it happens, everybody loves a true story of TREE LAW

# ? Apr 3, 2019 17:05

The Real Amethyst: Apr 20, 2018; When no one was looking, Serval took forty Japari buns. She took 40 buns. That's as many as four tens. And that's terrible.

Anal trauma or at the very least, fissures.

# ? Apr 3, 2019 17:10

Bloody Hedgehog: Dec 12, 2003; 💥💥🤯💥💥
Gotta nuke something

BMan posted:

... everybody loves a true story of TREE LAW

Wasn't that one of Jet Li's characters in The One?

# ? Apr 3, 2019 17:18

20 Blunts: Jan 21, 2017

Lead out in cuffs posted:

There's a four-storey-high birch tree between my three-storey apartment building and the one next door. It's right on the property line, about 10 feet from both buildings. The landlord wants to get rid of it. I got him a quote from an arborist, which came to $2,300, since you'd need to rig the tree not to fall on either building (or the parked cars in the road). That cost also includes getting a permit from the City, since that's required by law to cut down any tree bigger than 20cm diameter.

Pictured: the tree.

Him: "So I got that quote. That's a lot of money."
Me: "Yeah, that's what it takes to do it safely and legally."
Him: "Nah, it'll be fine. I'll come by with my chainsaw and cut it down myself. You'll see. I've done it loads of times. "
Me:

This hasn't happened yet, but I'm planning on not being in the building when and if it does.

yeah that thing isn't jack poo poo i wouldn't worry about it. lol having to get a permit every time you cut a tree though what a loving racket....

# ? Apr 3, 2019 17:51

PHIZ KALIFA: Dec 21, 2011; #mood

Autistic Edgy Guy posted:

yeah that thing isn't jack poo poo i wouldn't worry about it. lol having to get a permit every time you cut a tree though what a loving racket....

next post: Hey, who do I sue after an unlicensed arborist gets hired by a renter and they drop a tree through my roof? What a loving racket!

# ? Apr 3, 2019 17:58

Splicer: Oct 16, 2006; from hell's heart I cast at thee
🧙🐀🧹🌙🪄🐸

Autistic Edgy Guy posted:

lol having to get a permit every time you cut a tree though what a loving racket....

Friend, you came to the wrong thread.

# ? Apr 3, 2019 18:00

Ixian: Oct 9, 2001; Many machines on Ix....new machines; Pillbug

Autistic Edgy Guy posted:

yeah that thing isn't jack poo poo i wouldn't worry about it. lol having to get a permit every time you cut a tree though what a loving racket....

While I agree that tree isn't big enough to stomp the buildings around it flat Godzilla style it sounds like you'd be shocked at how much trouble it could cause if poo poo goes wrong cutting it down. Hint: More than the professional service is quoting to remove it.

As for "if poo poo goes wrong" - read the thread.

# ? Apr 3, 2019 18:01

Gath: Sep 23, 2009

PHIZ KALIFA posted:

next post: Hey, who do I sue after an unlicensed arborist gets hired by a renter and they drop a tree through my roof? What a loving racket!

Er there literally isnt a tree in that picture that could break a roof let alone a window. :confused:

# ? Apr 3, 2019 18:05

PHIZ KALIFA: Dec 21, 2011; #mood

Gath posted:

Er there literally isnt a tree in that picture that could break a roof let alone a window.

You can take that risk, if you're willing to pay for the consequences.

# ? Apr 3, 2019 18:07

Cojawfee: May 31, 2006; I think the US is dumb for not using Celsius

Yeah dude, a 50 foot tree can't break a window.

# ? Apr 3, 2019 18:07

Captain Foo: May 11, 2004; we vibin'
we slidin'
we breathin'
we dyin'

Gath posted:

Er there literally isnt a tree in that picture that could break a roof let alone a window.

# ? Apr 3, 2019 18:08

Yawgmoth: Sep 10, 2003; This post is cursed!

Autistic Edgy Guy posted:

yeah that thing isn't jack poo poo i wouldn't worry about it. lol having to get a permit every time you cut a tree though what a loving racket....

username checks out

# ? Apr 3, 2019 18:10

PHIZ KALIFA: Dec 21, 2011; #mood

THE INTERNET DISCOVERS REGULATIONS:

Step 1: Don't know why the professionals think this is hard, they're deffo overcharging
Step 2: EVERYTHING GOES WRONG
Step 3: Well the important thing is that they government should of had laws stopping me, i'm definitely not at fault here

# ? Apr 3, 2019 18:13

Gath: Sep 23, 2009

Cojawfee posted:

Yeah dude, a 50 foot tree can't break a window.

I could say i have street cred in cutting down trees..., but like a small saw or loppers could cut that. Do you people go outside? :gbsmith:

# ? Apr 3, 2019 18:16

PHIZ KALIFA: Dec 21, 2011; #mood

Gath posted:

I could say i have street cred in cutting down trees..., but like a small saw or loppers could cut that. Do you people go outside?

drat! A SMALL saw? Check out the burly arms on this fearless lumberjack. We're all utterly cowed by both your bravery and mastery of "going outside."

edit- i mean if i was pressed i'd take it out with the summer camp swiss army knife i have or maybe this bullshit "chain chainsaw" where it's just a bunch of metal wires and it sucks. probably piss hard enough to take it down also, but that's rude to do in public. we're the same, you and i.

# ? Apr 3, 2019 18:22

BMan: Oct 31, 2015; KNIIIIIIFE
EEEEEYYYYE
ATTAAAACK

Listen up you chumps, I've dropped enough trees on buildings in my time to know what I'm talking about

# ? Apr 3, 2019 18:23

Rust Martialis: May 8, 2007; At night, Bavovnyatko quietly comes to the occupiers’ bases, depots, airfields, oil refineries and other places full of flammable items and starts playing with fire there

Edit: oddly this is NOT the UKMT thread

# ? Apr 3, 2019 18:26

Splicer: Oct 16, 2006; from hell's heart I cast at thee
🧙🐀🧹🌙🪄🐸

Me: haha, like anyone's really dense enough to seriously engage with "Autistic Edgy Guy" drive-bying the OSHA thread with "permits are a racket"

Gath posted:

Er there literally isnt a tree in that picture that could break a roof let alone a window.

Me:

# ? Apr 3, 2019 18:26

Gath: Sep 23, 2009

Well, im just going to die on this strawman hill. :bahgawd:

# ? Apr 3, 2019 18:27

Renegret: May 26, 2007; THANK YOU FOR CALLING HELP DOG, INC.

YOUR POSITION IN THE QUEUE IS *pbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbt*

Cat Army Sworn Enemy

Gath posted:

I could say i have street cred in cutting down trees..., but like a small saw or loppers could cut that. Do you people go outside?

I've posted about this before but a neighbor of mine got his own dumbass killed when he thought exactly that, on a smaller tree that had more clearance around it on all sides. He rented a cherry picker and went up there by himself with a chainsaw, and was rewarded with a giant piece of falling trunk to his skull.

Don't gently caress with trees.

# ? Apr 3, 2019 18:28

20 Blunts: Jan 21, 2017

a permit for every single tree would be a racket where I work and most places, since the state keeps tabs on us in other ways and it wouldn't really make anything safer for anybody...

and that tree aint jack poo poo.

if anything permits like those are for environmental purposes or states trying to keep track on urban greens, not safety oriented. but again, my municipality just does that on their own without passing the cost to arborists

20 Blunts fucked around with this message at 18:44 on Apr 3, 2019

# ? Apr 3, 2019 18:36

darthbob88: Oct 13, 2011; YOSPOS

Gath posted:

I could say i have street cred in cutting down trees..., but like a small saw or loppers could cut that. Do you people go outside?

My own 2c on the tree- I helped my brother cut down a tree that was probably older than my state, roughly 100 feet tall. I can probably cut down that birch my own terrified-of-chainsaws self. You should still get a professional to do it instead.

# ? Apr 3, 2019 18:40

Kibayasu: Mar 28, 2010

Coming this summer: Anybody can cut down a tree. Not everyone can... survive.

# ? Apr 3, 2019 19:11

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# ? May 29, 2024 22:26

Mr. Fall Down Terror: Jan 24, 2018; by Fluffdaddy

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0BLsYRfgHWI&t=113s

# ? Apr 3, 2019 19:19

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > OSHA: definitely bent in the straight places

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