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https://twitter.com/TheOnion/status/1116772995203129346
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Apr 12, 2019 23:47
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Report I’ve been working on for 2 months was only missing info from my coworker to complete. Told her a month ago about it and my boss said she had to get it all done this week. I run a report today and see she hasn’t done poo poo. I was supposed to have a meeting with my boss on Monday to go over it all So i just went ahead and canceled it. Told my boss the work is not done so nothing to meet about. Coworker is off all next week and boss the week after. Looks like smooth sailing for me for a while.
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Apr 13, 2019 00:17
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Recommended by the BWM thread, "Barbarians at the Gate" is a really good (=good/evil chaos) corporate book having a lot of overlap with BWM (obviously).
theHUNGERian fucked around with this message at 04:15 on Apr 13, 2019 |
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Apr 13, 2019 01:50
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Raided a lunch meeting as it wrapped up, stole about a gallon of catered hummus and pitas to take home with me. Sometimes Corporate can accidentally lead to good things. 
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Apr 13, 2019 03:18
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They always manage to schedule the arrival of free food at my point of daily departure, or otherwise on days when I can't eat junk food. I know I'm kinda unique, but honestly it gets old being the only one who wants to have a "welcome back from your weekend, let's have a great week" foodfest. Maybe I need to start roaming other floors looking for friends.
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Apr 13, 2019 19:53
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https://twitter.com/broderick/status/1116720342590947330 This is insane and also I want to get hired as a secret Pinkerton agent.
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Apr 13, 2019 20:39
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Uterine Lineup posted:https://twitter.com/broderick/status/1116720342590947330 Are you willing to protect President Lincoln and shoot striking workers?
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Apr 13, 2019 21:40
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Meeting chat: My hell is meetings on Project A, only to have to listen to people talk about how they have not had time to do anything on Project A because they did this on Project B, that on Project C, and Project D needs more attention, ... . 
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Apr 13, 2019 23:15
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Uterine Lineup posted:https://twitter.com/broderick/status/1116720342590947330 We all know employee surveys are bullshit, here’s how to find out what your employees really think while fostering paranoia. A setup like that has to be really fun when tax time rolls around.
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Apr 14, 2019 00:30
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I don’t know if this is any comfort, but executive management doesn’t give a poo poo about the worker drones. They’re keeping an eye on one another and on the middle managers who unwittingly carry out their schemes.
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Apr 14, 2019 00:36
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Midjack posted:I wish I could Alan Smithee poo poo like that. Jokes on her then. I threw it out. My boss has a thing about being good guest where we do training, and he doesn't want to hear we left training areas as a disaster. So a few hours after lunch I clean up and throw stuff out. Most of the places I each at are distribution companies with attached warehouses. So cleaning up is usually throwing away the pans and stuff.
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Apr 14, 2019 00:41
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Uterine Lineup posted:https://twitter.com/broderick/status/1116720342590947330 No you don't. They aren't gun thugs anymore but I've worked with enough of them at this point to suspect that if everyone of them disappeared, there wouldn't be any serious period of mourning.
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Apr 14, 2019 00:44
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In Equity Private’s blog she joined regular officeworker teams at a few of her fund’s portfolio companies to sniff out who had actual organizational knowledge and who was useless.
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Apr 14, 2019 01:58
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Thomamelas posted:No you don't. They aren't gun thugs anymore but I've worked with enough of them at this point to suspect that if everyone of them disappeared, there wouldn't be any serious period of mourning. 
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Apr 14, 2019 02:38
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crazypeltast52 posted:In Equity Private’s blog she joined regular officeworker teams at a few of her fund’s portfolio companies to sniff out who had actual organizational knowledge and who was useless. Makes sense. If you’re going to clean up after a merger, you really don’t want to can the dude with a vague job description, that HR can’t really tell you what they’re doing, but if they’re gone everything goes to poo poo. I have one on my team, I spend an inordinate amount of time explaining to management that they’re actually underpaid, and no we can’t can them to hire clerks instead.
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Apr 14, 2019 14:28
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I won't post specific examples. Companies that employ them have deep pockets, hosed up senses of paranoia, and a vindictive streaks a mile long. I will speak in general terms. What they do now is marketed as corporate counter espionage. Basically spying on workers. Inserting people into the workforce, planting people at restaurants and hiding behind bushes to listen in case someone says something sensitive. Or says the word union.
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Apr 15, 2019 02:57
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What would happen if the people carrying the guns unionized? Who would Pinkerton call in to break their strike? Would they be allowed into the AFL-CIO if they created a union?
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Apr 15, 2019 03:16
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crazypeltast52 posted:What would happen if the people carrying the guns unionized? Who would Pinkerton call in to break their strike? Historically, the National Guard for state-level issues and federal troops for anything involving interstate commerce.
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Apr 15, 2019 05:25
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Sundae posted:Historically, the National Guard for state-level issues and federal troops for anything involving interstate commerce. Oh, yeah, them... Feds also show up if a rail car carrying the mail has issues.
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Apr 15, 2019 06:05
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Happy monday everyone I think I'm going to get into a fist fight with Sales. Anyone want to come? They didn't do anything wrong I just want to get into a fight.
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Apr 15, 2019 15:47
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Renegret posted:They didn't do anything wrong They're sales, so I somehow doubt this statement.
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Apr 15, 2019 15:55
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Kyrosiris posted:They're sales, so I somehow doubt this statement. They're only innocent in the sense that I can't prove anything
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Apr 15, 2019 15:57
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Renegret posted:They're only innocent in the sense that I can't prove anything That's closer to accurate.
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Apr 15, 2019 17:23
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A salesman at a friends company self reported an issue to HR and got a hire up canned. My money is that the report was a political maneuver and not any kind of moral obligation.
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Apr 15, 2019 17:27
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Our RAPS submitter is having technical issues, so no RAPS submissions to CMS until further notice. "Okay, thanks for letting me know. What does that affect?" Everything. "Haha, funny. Can you be more specific?" No.
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Apr 15, 2019 17:29
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Renegret posted:They're only innocent in the sense that I can't prove anything Be careful tangling with sales, if you aim to fight them you must crush them without mercy, otherwise theyll come back to bite you in the rear end. Theres a strong double standard that applies to sales people, in the sense that they get passes for acting immature/douchey/etc yet they become deeply offended when you act that way towards them and will loudly complain how you wronged them.
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Apr 15, 2019 17:32
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I've been trapped on a conference call for the past 2 hours right when I was about to leave for lunch. I think this is the smoking gun I need to punch sales in their ugly loving faces. Please ignore the fact that it's an emergency outage call and it has nothing to do with sales.
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Apr 15, 2019 18:12
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Is it a call to see if the outage resolves itself while the conference call is ongoing?
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Apr 15, 2019 18:19
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shockingly enough, no In an unusual twist of fate, we actually have a good handle on what's broken. And the SMEs can't figure it out.
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Apr 15, 2019 18:20
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Just one of the overhead lights in our cubicle farm is out, and it's directly over my office. It's like an inverse spotlight. I don't know if it's an omen, but I love it and have no intention of calling for repair.
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Apr 15, 2019 18:58
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"Okay Google, generate a 100%-rejection rate resume in three bullet points."
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Apr 15, 2019 19:13
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Sundae posted:"Okay Google, generate a 100%-rejection rate resume in three bullet points." sure I'll send over my resume
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Apr 15, 2019 19:15
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Sundae posted:"Okay Google, generate a 100%-rejection rate resume in three bullet points." The funny part is reverting that makes for good things to talk about when interviewing: - Lazy researcher and writer, sort of sloppy. - Only creative when applied to doing less work - Hates social media When can I start?
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Apr 15, 2019 19:18
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edit: gently caress this thread
The Sean fucked around with this message at 22:34 on Apr 24, 2020 |
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Apr 15, 2019 21:55
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Funny... my main goal to be personally satisfied with a job is to
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Apr 15, 2019 22:03
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Well gently caress, I didn't get the job I interviewed for two weeks ago. This is the 7th interview I've had in the last 5 months that hasn't landed me a new job. I gotta wonder if I'm doing something wrong in the interviews, or if I just have poo poo luck. Are mock interview services worth looking into? I legit need out of my job because I'm loving miserable there.
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Apr 15, 2019 23:27
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Did you remember pants? That's usually my failure mode when an interview goes sour.
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Apr 15, 2019 23:28
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momtartin posted:Well gently caress, I didn't get the job I interviewed for two weeks ago. This is the 7th interview I've had in the last 5 months that hasn't landed me a new job. I gotta wonder if I'm doing something wrong in the interviews, or if I just have poo poo luck. Are mock interview services worth looking into? I legit need out of my job because I'm loving miserable there. Have you asked the people you've interviewed with for any feedback?
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Apr 15, 2019 23:33
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momtartin posted:Well gently caress, I didn't get the job I interviewed for two weeks ago. This is the 7th interview I've had in the last 5 months that hasn't landed me a new job. I gotta wonder if I'm doing something wrong in the interviews, or if I just have poo poo luck. Are mock interview services worth looking into? I legit need out of my job because I'm loving miserable there. What do you think went well or not well? How long did it go and where do interviews usually end? While I've never done them, the mock interview feedback I've gotten have been pretty good. Its mostly about just getting you some feedback and experience vs telling you what to say.
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Apr 15, 2019 23:34
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| # ? Jun 10, 2024 08:39 |
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Dango Bango posted:Have you asked the people you've interviewed with for any feedback? I just e-mailed back asking for feedback, so I'm hoping to get some. Other people I've asked don't respond. Lockback posted:What do you think went well or not well? How long did it go and where do interviews usually end? Went well: I had good examples of customer success, a knowledge of the industry, was able to answer all their questions with relevant examples from my career: Con: I don't have hands on experience in one particular system they use a lot, which I'm sure hurt me, but I have taken the initiative to learn about the system via certifications and exams. My current company just doesn't offer any chance for me to learn these new skills because they're 20 years behind in technology. I don't even know which mock interview service to look at either, so if there are suggestions, I'll gladly take them.
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Apr 15, 2019 23:39
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