(Thread IKs:
Josherino)
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Sanguinary Novel posted:I was doing really good there for a minute and had a great weekend, but now it's time for the emotional crash and sobbing again. I'm not a praying woman, but please let this new therapist on Friday be worth a goddamn. Hey. I don't have anything to say that will make life easier. I just wanted to let you know that I saw your post, and you're not alone.
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May 21, 2019 08:37
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juche avocado posted:ahahahahah the last 15 minutes were not good minutes
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May 21, 2019 08:49
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Addamere posted:Therapists love to put the onus on the patient like dude and/or lady if I knew how or was able to figure out or fix this by myself then I would not need to be here. Yeah they REALLY love that. Like yeah, don't have the money to do these things to get a decent job, and no I cannot go back to what hired me it worked with my PTSD and ASD to gently caress me over into a depressive loop and that's why I am here dammit.
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May 21, 2019 08:51
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juche avocado posted:make sure u find a therapist who isn't wed to the DSM because apparently politics within the APA or w/e has made childhood PTSD something that the DSM refuses to speak about/acknowledge as possible, lol gently caress
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May 21, 2019 10:46
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i dont want to talk to therapists because i have a lot of forbidden knowledge id rather my head explode than get owned
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May 21, 2019 10:48
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Wth is forbidden knowledge? The Wu-tang secret?
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May 21, 2019 12:07
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When my friends and family finally convinced me to try therapy, I didn't know how to go about it so I just scheduled an appointment online and I didn't really realize that therapists specialized in other fields, so my suicidal depression and binge eating disorder was being treated by a sex therapist, which went about as well as expected. Then I went to someone more specialized in my problems and they had me watch ted talks, then I went to someone else once the violent intrusive thoughts became more intense and it cost too much and there was no parking. lol
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May 21, 2019 14:06
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FactsAreUseless posted:Now you're in a better position because you can look specifically for a psychiatrist who specializes in PTSD. A psych because you'll want to discuss meds at some point. MY WIFE goes to a person that does EMDR for trauma and that poo poo is weird as hell but she absolutely swears by it. I've noticed the difference, too.
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May 21, 2019 16:32
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mekyabetsu posted:Hey. I don't have anything to say that will make life easier. I just wanted to let you know that I saw your post, and you're not alone. Same for everyone's posts I want to give y'all a big ol hug and recommend to you a therapist that will make everything better but alas I do not have those powers Chokes McGee has issued a correction as of 16:39 on May 21, 2019 |
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May 21, 2019 16:33
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TRIPLE POSTNae! posted:That's the critique people give when they think something is off about your story but they don't have the experience or the understanding to articulate what. You have no real answer because they have no real question. Trust me on this one--I know a little something about writing, and I know a whole lot about being depressed. There are a lot of things about writing that can be legitimately depressing, but mediocre 'critique' shouldn't be one of them. If you can't use it, you can lose it. This is really really REALLY hard, though, and something I still struggle with. You're bearing your soul to people when you write—even if it's something like pulp fiction—and having someone go "nah I don't care," even implicitly/accidentally, stings like gently caress. (it's even better when you have AvPD too lmao) While I'm at it: never listen to anyone who says you have to hear "hard truths" or "tough love" or whatever to get better as a writer. It's abusive bullshit. Someone did it to them, then convinced them it was for their own good, and now they're doing it to you. If someone has good criticism, it'll be because they're excited about your idea and see where it could go if you made changes. If they're harsh jackasses, it's because they want to tear you down to feel like big important authors instead of helping, and they should gently caress off forever.
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May 21, 2019 16:39
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Chokes McGee posted:MY WIFE goes to a person that does EMDR for trauma and that poo poo is weird as hell but she absolutely swears by it. I've noticed the difference, too. was told about this (emdr) by my psych grad student friend in the same evening that she complained about internal politics at the APA poo poo is bonkers, works, and tbh i feel like i should make Medicaid let me take a shot at it edit i''m only saying that it works because said psych grad student friend made the case that it may/does work. i didn't do any studies. I'm sorry I've let you all down juche avocado has issued a correction as of 17:55 on May 21, 2019 |
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May 21, 2019 17:50
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KiteAuraan posted:Yeah they REALLY love that. Like yeah, don't have the money to do these things to get a decent job, and no I cannot go back to what hired me it worked with my PTSD and ASD to gently caress me over into a depressive loop and that's why I am here dammit. Is that really common? Is there a particular region or type of therapist who does this? I've generally had good experience with ADD/ADHD and Depression therapists over the course of several years.
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May 21, 2019 18:46
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Forgive me if I missed the answer in the last fifty pages or so, but does anyone know a way I can seek help for my mental stuff without having to divulge it to the government? I have a security clearance I need to do my job, but I'm afraid of losing it -- and my job -- if I get help for my PTSD and other issues. I know I need medicine and actual therapy, but I'm scared that if I get it I'll lose everything, which will end up with me in a worse spot than I was in before, because without my job and insurance I couldn't afford treatment, so not only will I have untreated mental issues, I'll be jobless and homeless too. It's starting to significantly affect me. Some days I'm so listless I can barely muster the energy to get out of bed. Hell, I should be at work right now, I need the money, but every time I tried to get up something in my brain said, "No, just lay down, don't think, don't move, just lay down, just lay down." I managed to get myself out of bed to eat something, but I lost my appetite halfway through. About an hour later I forced myself to finish eating, not because I was hungry, but because I can't stand wasting food. Other times I'm wracked with paranoia, and it's gotten so bad I've driven my friends away because part of me is convinced they were only pretending to be my friends. And when I feel that way, I get angry at them for lying to me, and I start to wonder if they have some ulterior motive for lying to me, so I get hostile and withdrawn. It doesn't help that they told me they didn't want to hang out anymore until I got help, because loneliness compounds my paranoia and depression but I'm too nervous to try to meet new people. I used to really, really look forward to getting together on the weekends to play D&D and stuff and it was genuinely getting me to relax and cope, but now that I'm by myself I don't have anything to look forward to but drinking and listening to political stuff. I can't even enjoy the D&D podcasts and videos I used to listen to since it just makes me remember being ejected from my gaming group because of my paranoia. I also don't remember how to be positive. As in, when I see a situation, I literally can't convince myself that it will turn out well. I can't remember the last time I had any hope for the future, although to be fair I think that last one is actually a sign of mental health because who the gently caress can be positive in 2019 who isn't a straight white goddamn billionaire? I don't know where to go or what to do. I'm terrified of losing my job, but I'm also terrified of losing my me, if that makes any sense.
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May 21, 2019 20:20
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What I found on the subject was this verbiage from section 1 of the rules for getting (not maintaining) a security clearance: No negative inference concerning the standards in this section may be raised solely on the basis of mental health counseling. . . . However, mental health counseling, where relevant to the adjudication of access to classified information, may justify further inquiry to determine whether the standards of subsection (b) of this section are satisfied, and mental health may be considered where it directly relates to those standards. Someone at clearencejobs.com said a diagnosis of bipolar or schizophrenia can make the government look at you as a security risk. the good news is the DoD apparently wont see any diagnosis. According to them they only ask, "In the last seven years, have you consulted with a health care professional regarding an emotional or mental health condition, or were you hospitalized for such a condition?" If you answer yes, they ask the medical professional you see "Does the person under investigation have a condition that could impair his or her judgment, reliability or ability to properly safeguard classified information?" if they answer no, that's the end of questioning. That's for military and civilian contractors. Here is the link to the dot mil site. If you dont want to click the link, I can c/p the info and PM it to you or something https://www.militaryonesource.mil/h...urity-clearance e: it sure sounds like you're ready to address a health concern of yours and you are pretty awesome for realizing that. It sure doesn't look like seeking treatment should sink your clearance since you already have it. Eat This Glob has issued a correction as of 20:34 on May 21, 2019 |
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May 21, 2019 20:31
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Starting mental health stuff won't get you drummed out if you already have a clearance. I got a colleague who is on antidepressants and has a DOE Q security clearance. He had to fill out some paperwork on his re authorization, but that was it. His manager doesn't know, so there's no stigma at work, and all he had to do was sign a piece of paper to say that he'd ask the doctor to notify OPS if the MDs professional opinion would indicate a security risk. It's all cool man. Get that help.
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May 21, 2019 20:39
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Thank you for the reply. However, if there's one thing I've learned about my job (and the government in general), it's that they absolutely do not follow the wording of the law. A good example of my worry is this article that describes how the government could reduce the benefits for the disabled for spurious reasons. If the government is so willing to hurt people, what's to keep them from having the company I work for send them information from my insurance claims to use as proof to take my job? My company's recently hired a lot of people, and I've been there for just under two years at this point, so it's entirely likely they'll try to get rid of me in order to keep "better" workers without mental defects, and they may try to get the government to revoke my clearance so they can have an excuse to let me go. I can't tell if this is a legitimate fear or my paranoia talking, and that terrifies me too. The things I'm scared of are perfectly rational things to be afraid of, so I can't tell if it's the world that's gone crazy or if it's just me. It's probably both. Jesus Christ, it's probably both.
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May 21, 2019 20:47
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mekyabetsu posted:Hey. I don't have anything to say that will make life easier. I just wanted to let you know that I saw your post, and you're not alone. Thanks friend. I know posting stuff like that in the thread isn't something actionable, just need to put that fear out there somewhere, and being here just makes me feel less alone.
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May 21, 2019 20:51
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I bought a bunch of research chemicals to see if that'll help my brain or give me a reason to wake up in the morning, they should arrive this week, wish me luck!
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May 21, 2019 21:22
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Mordor She Wrote posted:When my friends and family finally convinced me to try therapy, I didn't know how to go about it so I just scheduled an appointment online and I didn't really realize that therapists specialized in other fields, so my suicidal depression and binge eating disorder was being treated by a sex therapist, which went about as well as expected. Then I went to someone more specialized in my problems and they had me watch ted talks, then I went to someone else once the violent intrusive thoughts became more intense and it cost too much and there was no parking. Mordor She Wrote posted:I bought a bunch of research chemicals to see if that'll help my brain or give me a reason to wake up in the morning, they should arrive this week, wish me luck!
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May 21, 2019 21:58
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Mordor She Wrote posted:I bought a bunch of research chemicals to see if that'll help my brain or give me a reason to wake up in the morning, they should arrive this week, wish me luck! Please don't give yourself mystery meds
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May 21, 2019 22:00
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Mordor She Wrote posted:I bought a bunch of research chemicals to see if that'll help my brain or give me a reason to wake up in the morning, they should arrive this week, wish me luck! hahahahaha hello me from 2009 don't do this, ideally, but that's not really going to get through. do not get addicted. don't. don't. also, you know, don't do it in the first place. pls listen to my experience in this matter ty
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May 21, 2019 22:24
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How do counselors and therapists deal with hearing our horror stories of trauma and abuse daily for 40 hours a week? It seems like it would be a high turnover field to work in.
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May 21, 2019 22:48
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succ posted:How do counselors and therapists deal with hearing our horror stories of trauma and abuse daily for 40 hours a week? It seems like it would be a high turnover field to work in. That's a good question. Do they have psychiatrists? If so, why don't we go to them instead and cut out the middlemen?
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May 21, 2019 22:54
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If they're like doctors and nurses they emotionally distance themselves from the situations they encounter and develop hosed up senses of humor
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May 21, 2019 23:14
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Or serious drinking problems.
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May 21, 2019 23:21
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succ posted:How do counselors and therapists deal with hearing our horror stories of trauma and abuse daily for 40 hours a week? It seems like it would be a high turnover field to work in. i have asked this question it involves learned detachment, listening strategies, and not getting distracted by shiny objects (ie, dramatic intrigue). therapists need to develop a bunch of coping mechanisms, too, because there's no trigger warnings for you as a therapist. let's say you were traumatized by an event of sexual violence in your past: if your patient brings up their own experience with sexual violence, you need to be prepared to not fall down your own mental rabbit hole so that you can help your patient through theirs. for some people this is going to take the form of more-or-less coming to terms with their trauma or whatever. for others, it will involve walling it off in dualistic personalities (more like code switching) in my experience, good therapists do listen to most everything you're saying, but they're really looking past the content to the emotions underneath, all That One Scene In The Matrix-y also, i get the impression that the rigors/emotional work of the education required to be a therapist gets a lot of the potential turnover out of the way (these listening strategies, again, IME: don't immediately react and give a considered response, often asking questions instead of feeding into expected patterns of response; for example, "my mom abused me" doesn't get a response of "omg that's so terrible im so sorry!!!", but rather, "are you able to describe that?" "this is difficult stuff. how are you feeling right now?" or even just simple affirmation like "you're right, that is extremely hurtful.") but, yes! there are, in fact, therapists who specialize in therapy for therapists. there's also group therapy for therapists, where a bunch of degree-havers get together over hors d'oeuvres and talk about whatever in their own lives or their practice i am not a therapist obviously but I've been to see a whole shitton and i have a handful of therapist friends! juche avocado has issued a correction as of 23:39 on May 21, 2019 |
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May 21, 2019 23:37
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like when they're taking notes they're not writing verbatim my horror story about how my parents broke me they're writing: developmental disorder (subset) trust issues — learned behavior, parents (treatment: must involve showing J. Avocado it's okay to trust the people he depends on) (likely requires an aspect of self-acceptance) progress evident: J.A. was able to ........ not much traumatizing about that. one can learn to let the specifics wash over them after the specifics have served their purpose meanwhile that entire time I'm relating how my dad would beat me lol woot
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May 21, 2019 23:47
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Please do not take mystery chemicals, thread, especially ones from the Internet. While I understand the desperation that can lead you to it I must insist that you don’t
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May 22, 2019 01:15
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i eat mystery jerky from the internet instead
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May 22, 2019 01:22
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Poniard posted:i eat mystery jerky from the internet instead It's been a long time since we've met, Louisgod. A long time indeed. Too long. Too long. I considered taking mystery chemicals from the internet, but I realized that it could lead to even greater harm and make things much, much worse for me physically and mentally.
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May 22, 2019 01:26
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Please do not take Da Joose to fix imbalances in the brain.
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May 22, 2019 02:50
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KiteAuraan posted:Please do not take Da Joose to fix imbalances in the brain. What if I have an imbalance in my piano collection?
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May 22, 2019 03:28
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lmao i triggered myself into repressed memories by posting
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May 22, 2019 03:42
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Nae! posted:What if I have an imbalance in my piano collection? Just make sure you can get it up the stairs.
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May 22, 2019 04:00
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Nae! posted:What if I have an imbalance in my piano collection? tired: took joose, bought a piano wired: took ambien, screwed a cookie to the table inspired: took mystery internet drugs, voted for Marianne Williams
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May 22, 2019 04:01
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My friends bought a camping ticket for me to go to a music festival with them They're the best 
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May 22, 2019 05:40
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Mackers posted:My friends bought a camping ticket for me to go to a music festival with them 
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May 22, 2019 05:53
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i wonder what its like having actual friends
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May 22, 2019 05:54
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Poniard posted:i wonder what its like having actual friends it’s pretty rad you should go out and do things you really like to do but in a group, it increases chances you’ll make some
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May 22, 2019 05:57
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| # ? May 25, 2024 05:43 |
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so as part of an effort to fill my empty life I've been volunteering with the state library, because the only people interested in my historical research skills from my MA aren't interested in paying me for it (which is really depressing honestly). it's cool and all, I'm doing research for them in the archives which means i have access to all kinds of stuff including lots of official state records and minutia as well as microfilm collections, newspapers, all kinds of things. my job is to find out as much as possible about a black virginian who was elected to the state house of representatives during reconstruction to contribute an entry to one of their flagship projects, the Dictionary of Virginia Biography, which again is technically good as it would get my name on a small-scale publication however, i'm not willing to give away my labor without remuneration infinitely, and like, they're really demanding about the amount of time volunteers devote. i've started at ten hours a week and every time I've gone in they've tried to pressure me into increasing it to at least 20, with this who schpiel about how research really requires time (which is true, but I'm going to spread that time over weeks because they're not willing to pay me for something professional historians do) and Im going to find I just don't want to stop my work when I hit that low ten or fifteen hour mark it's really putting a bad taste in my mouth. like you loving assholes, if you need a historian to write your history for you and most of the work on this project is being done by paid historians with the same qualifications as me, why are you using mostly volunteers? i know practically it's because of severe budget shortfalls, state requirements, and the involvement of semi-private also underfunded entities like the Virginia Foundation for the Humanities, but i want a job writing history, and they seem like they just want me to come in and give them free professional part-time labor and aren't even grateful for the hours I'm giving them already. i really hope that job gets back to me soon. they contacted my references, or at least one of them who told me he gave me a great reference, because then i will actually be getting paid to work full time and i can drop this or do it on weekends
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May 22, 2019 15:22
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