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Well according to the Toronto Star-Ledger the pizza sucks. What an epic meme!Bro Dad posted:an app that sucks, crust so tough its crazy Why did someone do this? garfucc if ino
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Jun 9, 2019 09:22
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bvj191jgl7bBsqF5m posted:It's a rabbit hole into capitalist insanity. And it's totally real. https://www.instagram.com/p/BruOCcdB72L/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link
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Jun 9, 2019 10:12
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So I tried figuring out where the gently caress the money for this came from. The answer is an amazing failson story. Nathen Mazri's dad is an investment banker called Hayssam El-Masri. He manages multi-billion projects that look like this. Masri senior also runs a capital firm focused on the food and beverage industry, and a company that manages Canadian food franchises in the Gulf states. Nathen Mazri used to work for his dad's company, along with his brother Mohamed. He also ran a marketing company in Saudi Arabia, sponsored by fellow failson Shiekh Fahad Abunayyan. Here's Nathen giving a very confusing presentation to Saudi prince Mohammed bin Saud Al Kabeer. But Nathen is not just a businessman, he's a Renaissance Man. In true failson fashion, he's also a UCB graduate, a failed director and actor, and an author published under a vanity label. This is the sole production of Mazri Pictures. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wRvo9kpZLX8 His "self-help memoir" is something else.  MAZRI'S 10 LAWS TO CONVERT FROM Feeling species into Thinking species Nathen Mazri has become like a prisoner for injustice, like a soldier fighting for his life, and like a survivor thriving out of the kingdom for his freedom. All Nathen wanted was to feel alive. Nathen, a young Arab-Canadian man is leaving Laval in the French province of Quebec with his family to settle in a soon to be discovered a tyrannical kingdom of Arabia in the middle of the desert sinking his soul in monotony, an unspoken epidemic, and defeated by suppression for over 12 years of his life lingering with broken dreams, Scoliosis, sexual identity crisis, bipolar disease, and the struggle to claim true elusive love. So Garfield Eats is either being bankrolled by his oil investor dad, or is being funded directly by some other Gulf failson with his own index fund. Meanwhile his Chad brother Mohamed still works directly for his dad, while creating his own oil-based crypto which the Saudis are probably going to use to fund terrorism or something.
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Jun 9, 2019 14:43
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Nathen did an incredible interview with The Globe and Mail, which explains why the gently caress he chose Garfield. The whole interview is insanity. https://www.theglobeandmail.com/business/article-canadian-entrepreneur-behind-garfieldeats-wants-to-disrupt-fast-food/ quote:Goupons – like the company Groupon, or Garfield-branded coupons? quote:A lot of these plans deal with popular tech buzzwords. If people see them together and wonder how realistic that is, what is your response? This is the mysterious other guy on the website, who is probably scamming him. quote:You list Pascal Haider of Austria on your website as a partner – is he your only investor?
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Jun 9, 2019 14:49
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COMPAGNIE TOMMY posted:Well according to the Toronto Star-Ledger the pizza sucks. What an epic meme! If the Toronto Star-Ledger had said it was really good pizza, then it would be a good meme?
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Jun 9, 2019 14:51
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 I actually passed by it last night but it was late and closing soon so I didn't get a chance to order anything. I might be back in the area today. If so I'll at least try and grab a Garfaccino.
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Jun 9, 2019 15:02
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the orange "tomato sauce" is my favorite part of these. That and the person's description of it smelling like the garbage can in a butcher shop. That place has to just be loving setting money on fire to stay there. A storefront at Bloor and Ossington's got to be expensive, and there's no way in hell they're making enough to even keep the lights turned on based on the product they're turning out. Even with a dispensary close by.
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Jun 9, 2019 15:50
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goodog posted:His "self-help memoir" is something else. Left side looks like Hard Rock Nick’s fursona lmao
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Jun 9, 2019 16:00
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Nathen elicits an existential dread in me that those parody eldritch horror garfield comics never could
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Jun 9, 2019 16:01
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goodog posted:Nathen did an incredible interview with The Globe and Mail, which explains why the gently caress he chose Garfield. The whole interview is insanity. Yeah, this dude definitely seems stable.
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Jun 9, 2019 17:13
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So based on Goodog’s post, GarfieldEats is essentially Platform Masters if Uli’s bank account had lots of 0s in it rather than just one.
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Jun 9, 2019 17:30
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Mordja posted:Yeah, this dude definitely seems stable. I like that the lasagna boxes become tissue boxes. At first, I thought, of course he's so deranged or out of touch with what he's doing that "...no, used greasy take out boxes might not make the best tissue boxes", let alone why anyone would want a tissue box because..what? But then I thought, maybe if you're a real over-eater, like Garfield, maybe you feel bad about that, and maybe you cry a little after you eat a whole box of takeout lasagna from a place with a cartoon cat as a mascot, and some tissues might comfort you. And that's just a nice thing to do.
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Jun 9, 2019 17:36
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goodog posted:So I tried figuring out where the gently caress the money for this came from. The answer is an amazing failson story. Nathen Mazri's dad is an investment banker called Hayssam El-Masri. He manages multi-billion projects that look like this. Garfield Insaat
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Jun 9, 2019 17:43
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I really want to try this place.
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Jun 10, 2019 02:56
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The website makes me feel like I’ve got carbon monoxide poisoning. goodog and I called the number on the website last night at like 10pm Australian time and a man answered, said something in an arabic language, then I got nervous and hung up. 10/10
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Jun 10, 2019 03:17
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Mr Luxury Yacht posted:
Please report back and help us find out if the food is really as gross as they say!
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Jun 10, 2019 07:11
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Big Beef City posted:I like that the lasagna boxes become tissue boxes. You would have to take the tissues out of the box they already cane in
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Jun 10, 2019 07:23
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lol those loving prices are highway robbery as much as i would like to try the garfield-themed pizza and lasagna propped up by saudi blood money there is no way i am forking 30 bucks over for a tiny pizza and a hunk of lasagna
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Jun 10, 2019 08:45
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Fojar38 posted:lol those loving prices are highway robbery Information superhighway robbery bud.
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Jun 10, 2019 09:28
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goodog posted:he's also a UCB graduate University of California, Berkeley or Upright Citizen's Brigade? I would be so, so disappointed in UCB if it was the latter
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Jun 10, 2019 09:37
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Cubone posted:okay, this is important ultimate cum bitch
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Jun 10, 2019 10:05
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Cubone posted:okay, this is important The latter, but it doesn't say how far he made it through their program. He's exactly the kind of rich idiot who was fuelling the UCB improv bubble/pyramid scheme.
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Jun 10, 2019 10:32
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Lasagna's the worst takeaway thing ever as it takes ages to cool anyway
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Jun 10, 2019 11:40
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I feel like a media outlet other than The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > The Garfield Eats App needs to dig into/break the story of Nathen Mazri being an absolutely insane man because I am certain there's way way more going on beneath the surface here
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Jun 10, 2019 13:02
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Pastry of the Year posted:I feel like a media outlet other than The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > The Garfield Eats App needs to dig into/break the story of Nathen Mazri being an absolutely insane man because I am certain there's way way more going on beneath the surface here These days reporters write whole articles based solely on random reddit posts, so why not SA too?
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Jun 10, 2019 14:23
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I Hate Mondays!
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Jun 10, 2019 16:13
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Does the food have higher prices on mondays
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Jun 10, 2019 16:16
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I want to post nudes on the Garfield Eats app
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Jun 10, 2019 20:38
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Malcolm Excellent posted:I want to post nudes on the Garfield Eats app Aren't their tons of pictures of Garfield? Or is he a never-nude.
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Jun 10, 2019 20:48
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Malcolm Excellent posted:I want to post nudes on the Garfield Eats app I want to SEE nudes on the Garfield Eats app
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Jun 10, 2019 20:50
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pseudanonymous posted:Aren't their tons of pictures of Garfield? Or is he a never-nude. I assume he meant nudes of himself rather than ever more nudes of Garfield, of which thankfully the world brims.
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Jun 10, 2019 20:53
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Why can’t I get this app on the UK App Store, I’m missing out
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Jun 10, 2019 20:56
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Big Beef City posted:I assume he meant nudes of himself rather than ever more nudes of Garfield, of which thankfully the world brims. Thanks for clarifying, I surely didn't misunderstand on purpose.
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Jun 10, 2019 21:03
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pseudanonymous posted:Thanks for clarifying, I surely didn't misunderstand on purpose. You're welcome! Please feel free to ask any more questions you have about the Garfield ap and be sure to vote the thread 5 and thank the OP if you enjoy 
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Jun 10, 2019 21:11
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Big Beef City posted:You're welcome! I have quite enjoyed the thread and thank the OP.
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Jun 10, 2019 21:13
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Mordja posted:Yeah, this dude definitely seems stable. Jim Davis thinks so, as long as his checks clear. From that Globe & Mail article: "Mr. Davis, who first heard about Mr. Mazri’s idea through a licensing agent in 2016, called GarfieldEATS 'the most inventive and well-rounded concept we have ever received from the restaurant industry sector,' in an e-mail to The Globe. 'It would be great fun to see Garfield feeding the world. Nothing would make him happier, except of course, feeding himself.' " Edit: VVV he means checks that end in fewer zeroes. A Pack of Kobolds fucked around with this message at 21:26 on Jun 10, 2019 |
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Jun 10, 2019 21:20
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A Pack of Kobolds posted:Jim Davis thinks so, as long as his checks clear. From that Globe & Mail article: The implication of that quote is that Jim Davis has received less well-rounded concepts from the restaurant industry sector. It really seems a crime those haven't been published or written up somewhere.
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Jun 10, 2019 21:23
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Arbuck Something was wrong with the coffee.
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Jun 10, 2019 21:25
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dsf posted:I want to SEE nudes on the Garfield Eats app well there's already one also, be the change etc...
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Jun 10, 2019 21:48
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Why did he shout out Breckin Meyer in the Instagram post
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Jun 10, 2019 22:28
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