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Gloomy Rube
Mar 4, 2008




I love that the journalist who wrote this article seems to be on a first-name basis with a submarine.

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Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

Pastry of the Year posted:

the Middle School Urban Legends thread in GBS and this thread have, perhaps inevitably, collided in a terrible way:

Waitress ‘caught putting hot dog up her vagina before apparently serving it to customer’


Phlegmish posted:

She could've taken it to clips4sale and made more money than by waiting tables
You might not realize the absurd extent to which this is true. A friend of mine recently sold a shitload of clips if her modeling watches in a LBD.

She also did one of the most bizarre, surreal custom clip I have ever heard of.

Pissed Ape Sexist
Apr 19, 2008

Fatty Crabcakes posted:

She also did one of the most bizarre, surreal custom clip I have ever heard of.

This one time a rad story happened. Trust me, the thing which occurred was definitely a thing worth explaining. Anyway, bye

Punished Chuck
Dec 27, 2010

KINDLY OLD GRANDPA NARRATOR CHARACTER: Ah, but that’s a story for another time... [closes a big leather-bound book titled “Post Your Favorite (Or Request) > Weird News Headlines, Quotes, & Articles,” smiles warmly, credits roll]

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

Pissed Ape Sexist posted:

This one time a rad story happened. Trust me, the thing which occurred was definitely a thing worth explaining. Anyway, bye
It totally was.

Cartoon Man
Jan 31, 2004
Probation
Can't post for 14 hours!
https://www-m.cnn.com/2019/06/21/us/giant-squid-on-camera-in-us-trnd/index.html

They got another giant squid on cam.

Scathach
Apr 4, 2011

You know that thing where you sleep on your arm funny and when you wake up it's all numb? Yeah that's my whole world right now.


So apparently the females get 13 meters long. That's longer than most busses.

Randaconda
Jul 3, 2014

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
https://getpocket.com/explore/item/why-rich-kids-are-so-good-at-the-marshmallow-test

Dienes
Nov 4, 2009

dee
doot doot dee
doot doot doot
doot doot dee
dee doot doot
doot doot dee
dee doot doot


College Slice

Oh, hey, my thesis/diss topic.

Authors conveniently ignored a ton of delay discounting research from the last few decades and didn't bother to look into the mechanisms behind the correlation with affluence. What they present as a "holy poo poo" finding has been known for a long time - kids in impoverished environments struggle to learn willpower skills because in an impoverished environment the second marshmallow isn't guaranteed like it is in an affluent one.

There's SO MUCH WEIRDER stuff in this area, like bikinis making men more impulsive, or looking at how holding a small crocodile changes how tourists gamble.

Bogus Adventure
Jan 11, 2017

More like "Bulges Adventure"

Dienes posted:

Oh, hey, my thesis/diss topic.

Authors conveniently ignored a ton of delay discounting research from the last few decades and didn't bother to look into the mechanisms behind the correlation with affluence. What they present as a "holy poo poo" finding has been known for a long time - kids in impoverished environments struggle to learn willpower skills because in an impoverished environment the second marshmallow isn't guaranteed like it is in an affluent one.

There's SO MUCH WEIRDER stuff in this area, like bikinis making men more impulsive, or looking at how holding a small crocodile changes how tourists gamble.

Hell yeah, gonna take a croc with me next time I go to Vegas!

Milo and POTUS
Sep 3, 2017

I will not shut up about the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. I talk about them all the time and work them into every conversation I have. I built a shrine in my room for the yellow one who died because sadly no one noticed because she died around 9/11. Wanna see it?
You have an alligator in your hands why would you need to gamble. You've already won at life

Bogus Adventure
Jan 11, 2017

More like "Bulges Adventure"
Croco needs cash!

Also, if anyone is interested in a really long read regarding the rise and fall of babe.net, here is an article with the same name:

https://www.thecut.com/2019/06/babe-net-aziz-ansari-date-rise-and-fall.html

That entire office was just :staredog:

HisMajestyBOB
Oct 21, 2010


College Slice
The crocodile thing might also translate to impulse buys. This means the future of American shopping malls is being handed a live croc upon entering.

ultrafilter
Aug 23, 2007

It's okay if you have any questions.




From the St. Louis Post-Dispatch on May 13, 1910.

venus de lmao
Apr 30, 2007

Call me "pixeltits"

Tag yourself, I'm the hen fruit.

Captain Hygiene
Sep 17, 2007

You mess with the crabbo...



I'm the aroused neighborhood

d3lness
Feb 19, 2011

Unicorns are metal. Gundanium alloy to be exact...

I'm the weird indentation of the headline.

Veni Vidi Ameche!
Nov 2, 2017

by Fluffdaddy

d3lness posted:

I'm the weird indentation of the headline.

It was 1910. Left-alignment was at least a decade away. They could barely manager centering, and the right-aligned text was faked by centering the text with an offset.

Milo and POTUS
Sep 3, 2017

I will not shut up about the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. I talk about them all the time and work them into every conversation I have. I built a shrine in my room for the yellow one who died because sadly no one noticed because she died around 9/11. Wanna see it?

Veni Vidi Ameche! posted:

It was 1910. Left-alignment was at least a decade away. They could barely manager centering, and the right-aligned text was faked by centering the text with an offset.

Wow... their computers must have sucked back then

Splicer
Oct 16, 2006

from hell's heart I cast at thee
🧙🐀🧹🌙🪄🐸

HisMajestyBOB posted:

The crocodile thing might also translate to impulse buys. This means the future of American shopping malls is being handed a live croc upon entering.
Inside every door is the impulse purchase crocodile handling kits

The MSJ
May 17, 2010

Putting all my skill points in croc handling in Floridapunk 2020.

mrkillboy
May 13, 2003

"Something witty."
https://twitter.com/Variety/status/1143097958780604417?s=19

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised.

Milo and POTUS posted:

Wow... their computers must have sucked back then

Not everyone could afford Mycroft Holmes.

Azathoth
Apr 3, 2001


Spirited Away is a way better movie and I would pay very good money to see it on the big screen again. I *might* watch Toy Story 4 if it were on Netflix and I was babysitting my niece.

Ellie Crabcakes
Feb 1, 2008

Stop emailing my boyfriend Gay Crungus

Veni Vidi Ameche! posted:

It was 1910. Left-alignment was at least a decade away. They could barely manager centering, and the right-aligned text was faked by centering the text with an offset.
Linotype did full justification in the late 19th though?

lord funk
Feb 16, 2004

I was just in China and I was pissed that Spirited Away was playing only after I returned. We saw the new X-Men instead. It blew.

The Bloop
Jul 5, 2004

by Fluffdaddy

Azathoth posted:

Spirited Away is a way better movie and I would pay very good money to see it on the big screen again. I *might* watch Toy Story 4 if it were on Netflix and I was babysitting my niece.

do you mean you'd watch it again with your niece or that you're rating movies that you haven't seen?

Carthag Tuek
Oct 15, 2005

Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
slægt skal følge slægters gang



Fatty Crabcakes posted:

Linotype did full justification in the late 19th though?

smdh if your typographer isn't up to snuff with his intra-word spacing

That said it was way faster and thus cheaper to just slap the letters in the frame and go to print. Makes more sense for a newspaper than a book

Mycroft Holmes
Mar 26, 2010

by Azathoth

Ghost Leviathan posted:

Not everyone could afford Mycroft Holmes.

they didn't even have dental.

mrkillboy
May 13, 2003

"Something witty."
https://twitter.com/AUSOlympicTeam/status/1143551386539450368?s=19

Aleph Null
Jun 10, 2008

You look very stressed
Tortured By Flan

One bright spot in this, the worst timeline.

Bogus Adventure
Jan 11, 2017

More like "Bulges Adventure"

Hell yeah, that's much more interesting than poo poo like "dressage"

Ada
Apr 22, 2014

Practice proper gun's safety.

In 4 years the next Mario and Sonic at the Olympic Games title is gonna produce some mad gifs of Bowser and Eggman in the breakdancing minigame.

AlbieQuirky
Oct 9, 2012

Just me and my 🌊dragon🐉 hanging out
How are they going to do surfing, exactly?

Carthag Tuek
Oct 15, 2005

Tider skal komme,
tider skal henrulle,
slægt skal følge slægters gang



AlbieQuirky posted:

How are they going to do surfing, exactly?

Hello, a lil thing called La Seine????

Samuringa
Mar 27, 2017

Best advice I was ever given?

"Ticker, you'll be a lot happier once you stop caring about the opinions of a culture that is beneath you."

I learned my worth, learned the places and people that matter.

Opened my eyes.

hell loving yes

By popular demand
Jul 17, 2007

IT *BZZT* WASP ME--
IT WASP ME ALL *BZZT* ALONG!


Reposting from the funny images thread:

Frazzbo
Feb 2, 2006

Thistle dubh

By popular demand posted:

Reposting from the funny images thread:


turlt

By popular demand
Jul 17, 2007

IT *BZZT* WASP ME--
IT WASP ME ALL *BZZT* ALONG!


Are you going to break Pedro's heart by telling him he can't be a turlt? The poor guy has been through enough.

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Cartoon Man
Jan 31, 2004
Probation
Can't post for 14 hours!

By popular demand posted:

Reposting from the funny images thread:


Future upgrades are incoming.

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