(Thread IKs:
Josherino)
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you’re an extremely good brother. i, and probably most people in their late 20s, would literally kill for the opportunity to move out and become independent in a safe way like that for a reasonable price. housing is so godawful expensive, idk how I’ll be able to actually afford an apartment or something on top of other expenses making $35k so I can’t even begin to imagine how people manage on less. the whole abstract concept of adulthood as it exists in the social aether is an unattainable fantasy for most people but nevertheless remains the general expectation PsychedelicWarlord posted:so sorry to hear about the toe, yikes. hope it heals quickly. take it easy if you can. thanks friend. gonna miss being able to exercise, and now I’m just in a rotten mood because my paycheck sucks after taking out insurance/parking/mandatory retirement even though I’ll never be able to retire and it’s making me not even want to pay to get it checked out even though it keeps swelling so I’m just gonna tape the gently caress out of it and hope for the best. guess that’s all they’d do at the doctor anyway
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Jul 15, 2019 19:46
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| # ? May 26, 2024 23:36 |
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Chokes McGee posted:I just started archery. there must be something in the water, my family just started doing archery. I get an hour a week at the range and for that hour there is nothing but the sun and the trees and that satisfying thunk sound. anyway, my therapist told me to stop following the news, lol.
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Jul 15, 2019 19:46
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Frog Act posted:you’re an extremely good brother. i, and probably most people in their late 20s, would literally kill for the opportunity to move out and become independent in a safe way like that for a reasonable price. housing is so godawful expensive, idk how I’ll be able to actually afford an apartment or something on top of other expenses making $35k so I can’t even begin to imagine how people manage on less. the whole abstract concept of adulthood as it exists in the social aether is an unattainable fantasy for most people but nevertheless remains the general expectation thanks for the kind words. the dream of homeownership is alive in very rural America. I just finished paying off the house I'm going to sell him. It cost me a grand total of $25k and was sold to me on contract (not through a bank) and I made monthly payments to the guy who owned it. I'm selling it to my brother at a pretty decent loss because he's my brother and he is getting back on his feet. so he's getting a 3 br, 1.5 bath house with a fireplace for what than I'm paying for 10 months worth of rent in new england. he's doing this on $12/hr or so. Before moving back, he and his 5 roommates were on the hook for 1,900/mo rent plus utilities making $12.50/hr. my wife and I were in absolutely dire financial straights when we moved to iowa and got back on our feet because it was so cheap to live there. house+utilities were around $550/$600 month to own a home.
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Jul 15, 2019 20:19
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Consummate Professional posted:ooh archery is a cool idea. there's a bunch of places around here I can take a look at. thanks! form is more important than anything else so listen to the instructor! and don't be discouraged if your first few shots fling off the bullseye comically, you'll get there
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Jul 15, 2019 21:01
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Eat This Glob posted:my brother is seeking some help after a bout with bad depression. he's been on meds before but they didnt work for him. this is his first go 'round since getting sober and he's in a stable job with insurance and has an inexpensive place to live that he is buying from me for less than the cost of a new compact car. maybe everyone is mentally ill in some way
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Jul 15, 2019 21:02
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I noticed on facebook an old friend id gotten out of touch with moved back to a city near me and I want to get in touch with them but my brain is acting up
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Jul 15, 2019 21:22
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got any sevens posted:maybe everyone is mentally ill in some way capitalism syndrome
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Jul 15, 2019 23:24
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i wonder if i can live next to chokes
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Jul 15, 2019 23:36
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redsniper posted:I used to be this and like to think I'm way better now. Brain medicine and meditation helped some, but really it was just going out over and over got easier the more I did it. Like everything else it gets easier with practice. I made some of my best friends going to the same (anime) meetup consistently. A lot of times early on it was like a chore but I figured it was good for me to do the social. It took about a year or so before I felt like one of the guys, but I'm slow to warm up to people. I figure the hardest part for me is to get started and getting started now is better than two months down the line. Meditation is something I have been putting off but I have a pretty good setup for it now. Consummate Professional posted:I am currently working on digging out of this hole and regrowing my interests outside of getting blackout drunk. it's really tough! for me once I tell someone I'm going to do something or say it out loud I'll do it, but I also have gotten good at putting that off. It is tough! I like your therapist's idea, it is clever. I've been getting more into board games and now is a good time to find a local group. A city library should also have something interesting.
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Jul 16, 2019 02:02
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I am diagnosed with BP 1 I had a manic episode (my second, ever) in May of this year. Definitely thought a lot about stuff like climate change loving the planet and the absurd amount of black men in prison for selling weed. I felt the injustice of our country acutely, full blasting racing thoughts in my brain. Spent 4 days in hospital. Luckily I have savings, "good" insurance. So my life is not in utter ruins now. I am actually doing great in recovery one of those things I did was block twitter and facebook on my machine by editing the etc/hosts file to redirect any attempts to visit those sites. I like a lot of the general stuff in the op.
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Jul 16, 2019 04:48
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I've noticed a tendency I have that I'll sink into steadily deeper depression and exhaustion for days on end, and then I'll read or hear something sufficiently awful or victim-blaming and all that depression and despair turns into righteous loving fury instantly, like flipping a switch. The exhaustion just evaporates and I have more energy than I've ever been able to get from caffeine, without the anxious side effects. It also switches my political outlook from existential despair to super angry hope that we can smash our problems right in the loving face. I talked to my therapist about it because that kind of hard switch felt like how bipolar people have described it, but apparently the "slow sinking depression -> sudden anger" thing is pretty standard for PTSD, which we know I have. I'm a little worried about self medicating by pissing myself off on purpose, but I guess it's better than self medicating by drinking five cups of coffee and giving myself a panic attack. 
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Jul 16, 2019 14:01
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So yesterday I posted about wanting to get back in touch with an old friend, but then i start freaking out about how it's be weird to talk to someone after having only a bit of contact for several years. Now I kind of don't give a shot about it either way and I can't tell if it was stupid to begin with, if I don't care about being in touch with people, or both
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Jul 16, 2019 15:21
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when I feel that way, which is a lot because it’s easy to become isolated and lose track of people, I just try to plow through the initial anxiety by compelling myself to send the simple “what’s up” text to whomever I’m thinking about seeing, like ripping off a bandaid. then if they answer you can try to keep that dynamic going, using whatever strategy you can to minimize anxiety long enough to talk to people. if they don’t answer then you can feel good about at least having tried get out there and do something social. people are usually happy to hear from old friends, it’s often good to think about how you would feel if they got in touch out of the blue - probably fine, or better than fine, because it’s pretty common and not weird for adults to have friendships like that imo
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Jul 16, 2019 15:33
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I’ve done that twice for two different friends in the past few months. haven’t heard anything back. that, coupled with just complete silence from my other friends has put me in a dark place. I don’t know.
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Jul 16, 2019 15:43
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CelticPredator posted:I’ve done that twice for two different friends in the past few months. haven’t heard anything back. yeah that seems to be one of the curses of adulthood, or maybe just of sad goonhood, either way it’s something I’ve been struggling with a lot lately too. I keep telling myself I’ll go to DSA meetings to try to make some friends but I never actually go, often spend like two or three weeks without being social. the only thing i know that helps with social isolation is getting mega stoned and playing a distracting enough video game you no longer care
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Jul 16, 2019 15:45
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Frog Act posted:people are usually happy to hear from old friends, it’s often good to think about how you would feel if they got in touch out of the blue - probably fine, or better than fine, because it’s pretty common and not weird for adults to have friendships like that imo Thanks, thats actually a big help. I always freak out about this sort of thing and hopefully I can think about it in a healthier way. CelticPredator posted:I’ve done that twice for two different friends in the past few months. haven’t heard anything back. I know this isn't a great long term thing but whats worked for me being really bad at holding friendships together is having some sort of regular thing you do. I'm lucky enough that ive got a small group that meets up same bar, same time every week so I can socialize but theres other things you can try- if youre into it board games are a good thing if you just need to do something with people, volunteering is nice, maybe see if there's any outdoor groups or something. From experience you'll probably still have weird social anxieties but its much, much better to have anyone to talk to than just cooking your brain by yourself
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Jul 16, 2019 15:53
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Frog Act posted:when I feel that way, which is a lot because it’s easy to become isolated and lose track of people, I just try to plow through the initial anxiety by compelling myself to send the simple “what’s up” text to whomever I’m thinking about seeing, like ripping off a bandaid. then if they answer you can try to keep that dynamic going, using whatever strategy you can to minimize anxiety long enough to talk to people. if they don’t answer then you can feel good about at least having tried get out there and do something social. it makes so much sense seeing it written like this. why do i isolate my self in the first place. 
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Jul 16, 2019 16:23
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Just feel worthless. I really wish he hadn’t bothered to dump me. What’s even the point, it certainly doesn’t make me feel happy and I doubt he feels great about it either.
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Jul 16, 2019 17:24
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today my therapist said i am a poster child for adaptive coping with stressful situations and told me to stop being so hard on myself. it's hard because i feel like such a disaster all the time and i feel like everyone can tell how lonely and desperate i am. but apparently it's not showing as much on the outside as i thought.
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Jul 16, 2019 17:25
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What sort of starting costs are you looking at for archery? that does sound really fun Also has anyone moved back home and it ended up being a good choice? I'm debating it but a bit worried that there won't be any recovery and then i'm just living at home and hosed...
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Jul 16, 2019 17:26
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CODChimera posted:Also has anyone moved back home and it ended up being a good choice? I'm debating it but a bit worried that there won't be any recovery and then i'm just living at home and hosed... I did while sorting out college amd it worked pretty well but I have a good relationship with my parents and had a plan to get through college so ymmv SunAndSpring posted:Just feel worthless. I really wish he hadn’t bothered to dump me. What’s even the point, it certainly doesn’t make me feel happy and I doubt he feels great about it either. Tbh I don't really know what to say that can help but you're a decent person and I hope you pull through here
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Jul 16, 2019 17:31
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CODChimera posted:What sort of starting costs are you looking at for archery? that does sound really fun I did for most of this summer and it was good. You have to be careful so that you don't feel like you're spinning your wheels. A good relationship with your parents is also key. It's good for saving up money. If you do it, set a goal date for leaving and focus on that.
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Jul 16, 2019 17:53
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CODChimera posted:What sort of starting costs are you looking at for archery? that does sound really fun at the risk of revealing the true heights of my lameness, I’m 29 and I just...never moved out. I was either in school full time and didn’t have money for an apartment or was working some kind of job so lovely i couldn’t even afford to be a roommate. so my entire adult life has been spent at home, and it’s been a double edged sword, not least because of the incredible sense of shame and patheticness it can cultivate. however, that self-hatred and pathos is largely borne out of my various failures and proclivities that kept me from becoming a more normal person - moving back home when you’ve lived independently and temporarily need support is fundamentally different and completely rational. living at home definitely helped when I quit opiates and went to rehab, and having my parents support in general is the only reason I was able to finish my MA and stuff. it’s also a tremendous asset if you’re a lonely or isolated person. like I know it’s stereotypically emasculating and the platonic ideal of a pathetic weirdo thing but if you have a good relationship with your parents then having them around can be great. I talk to my mom all the time because she’s cool and smart. if you feel you need support in your recovery, and like your parents, you should seriously consider it
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Jul 16, 2019 17:58
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To expand on what Frog Act said, there should be no shame in living at home for several reasons (assuming your parents don't suck) 1. Capitalism sucks and makes living independently extremely expensive and difficult 2. People have lived with their parents/grandparents/etc. into adulthood for pretty much all of human history and still do around the world 3. Assuming like I said that your parents don't suck, it can be really good to have them as a support network I've moved back home several times in my life for one reason for another and I'm doing pretty okay all things considered
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Jul 16, 2019 18:43
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Gonna go full mindless consumer and hope that my new phone will cheer me up once it finally comes to my house. the job search still sucks, and at my current job, i feel isolated from my coworkers because i just don't care anymore. they're fine, i just hate this job so goddamn much, just mind-numbingly boring and unchanging.
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Jul 16, 2019 19:10
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Zyla posted:i wonder if i can live next to chokes get out of my dryer I'm trying to do laundry
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Jul 16, 2019 20:01
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i wish the parents would move in with each other and us millennials could bunk together cheap
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Jul 16, 2019 20:08
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Pablo Nergigante posted:To expand on what Frog Act said, there should be no shame in living at home for several reasons (assuming your parents don't suck) Agree with this. It is really a United States thing regarding living solo as a young adult. Go to many other countries and it is much more common to live at home. Rent and housing prices across the U.S. are extremely high. It is better to work and save money and eventually move out.
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Jul 16, 2019 20:09
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it still sucks when you know all this [Frog Act is right] but you are still so bombarded with lovely messaging from the people you know IRL not to mention the media that its impossible to not feel ashamed anyways.
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Jul 16, 2019 20:40
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its not even a matter of self-doubt or self-loathing, but just that these attitudes still exist and for no other reason than to shame you.
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Jul 16, 2019 20:42
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A Big Fuckin Hornet posted:it still sucks when you know all this [Frog Act is right] but you are still so bombarded with lovely messaging from the people you know IRL not to mention the media that its impossible to not feel ashamed anyways. It doesn't help that a lot of CHUDy parents are on-board with this message of WHY ARE YOU STILL IN MY HOUSE YOU FAILURE, GET OUT as part of their unshakable belief in Number 
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Jul 16, 2019 21:12
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cross-postin from TCC: Taking a break from terp carts and the vaporgenie for a while, want to look into non-vaping/non-smoking approaches. Anyone have any input on THC capsules or tinctures (Howl's tinctures are what's available up my neck of the woods)? I'm a daily user so I have a pretty high tolerance - what kind of dosage would I be looking at to keep a nice, anxiety-killing buzz going for a few hours? 10-20 mg? (USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)
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Jul 17, 2019 04:01
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Farrier Theaks posted:cross-postin from TCC: ...what I think you took a wrong turn here
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Jul 17, 2019 04:28
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 Brief thread messageI’m not sure whether or not I’ve been consistent about this, but unless it’s nutritional (vitamin, omega 3 oil, we.) then please do not ask directly for dosages. We are not here for doctor advice, and while sharing your experiences in X dosage is cool, working together online to adjust or determine a dosage is not. I’ll make sure that gets into the op, idk, sometime tomorrow. I’m lazy ok
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Jul 17, 2019 06:04
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Farrier Theaks posted:cross-postin from TCC: I think an unwritten rule of a mental health thread is that you should only be able to talk about CBD and not THC
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Jul 17, 2019 06:24
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Its Coke posted:I think an unwritten rule of a mental health thread is that you should only be able to talk about CBD and not THC The rec came from my doc (legal state) to try tinctures but I didnt consider the whole liability angle about asking about doses here. My bust~
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Jul 17, 2019 13:12
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I dont know if it will help but I take 40mg cbd in the morning and it helps me with my stress. I dont really think getting high as gently caress really promotes true mental health so I cannot help any further than that.
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Jul 17, 2019 13:42
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Its Coke posted:I think an unwritten rule of a mental health thread is that you should only be able to talk about CBD and not THC I dunno I never use CBD, doesn’t do dick for me and it feels like a waste of money, but I can definitely vouch for THC being a tremendously useful and important tool in my mental health toolbox. idk what my typical dose is because I’m in an illegal state but since I started working having my oil pen ready to go as soon as I walk out of the building is an enormous motivator + relief. It also really helps me exercise and sleep, THC is the absolute best. i get avoiding discussing dosages of drugs in general or even just the whole topic but talking about THC or CBD doses is the least dangerous version of that discussion since the absolute worst case scenario is an extremely long nap. Ferdinand the Bull posted:I dont know if it will help but I take 40mg cbd in the morning and it helps me with my stress. I dont really think getting high as gently caress really promotes true mental health so I cannot help any further than that. interesting. I usually feel lovely when I’m unmedicated but for now, suboxone is powerful enough I don’t have any real anxiety and my depression is weirdly ignorable. I’m tapering under doctors supervision though and I’m scared of when my dose goes down below a certain threshold and it becomes harder and harder to cope, and I’m wondering if CBD will ameliorate that. in the past I’ve taken absolutely enormous doses of it and felt nothing though. I agree it’s not always a good idea to get high as gently caress, like my natural inclination is to hit my oil pen first thing when I roll out of bed, and I still do when I have the day off, but I’ve quit smoking in the morning since I don’t want to be high at work. I think it’s not so much being stoned that can be bad for mental health as it is making poor decisions about when you should be stoned Equeen posted:Gonna go full mindless consumer and hope that my new phone will cheer me up once it finally comes to my house. the job search still sucks, and at my current job, i feel isolated from my coworkers because i just don't care anymore. they're fine, i just hate this job so goddamn much, just mind-numbingly boring and unchanging. did it? buying new things when life sucks is really cathartic even bearing in mind the blood soaked horror of manufacturing and the relentless commodification of every aspect of human life. I bought a new 2DSXL with Ocarina of Time and Pokemon Crystal and I will admit that the consumptive moment when I actually bought it was disturbingly satisfying and now I have something to do during down time at work. has your new phone made work slightly more bearable?
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Jul 17, 2019 14:24
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I definitely get like a little tingle of dopamine when I buy like a new video game or something. I think we’re all conditioned to think that Buying New Thing = Good, Make Life Better  How long does it usually take to start feeling lovely if you don’t take SSRIs? I missed 3? Lexapro doses over the weekend because my cat was sick (she’s okay now but we spent several late nights at the emergency vet) and I couldn’t get to the pharmacy in time. I felt really lovely yesterday, really irritable and my sleep schedule has been terrible but I don’t know if that’s from missing the doses or just because I had a lovely weekend. I picked up my refill this morning thankfully e: Frog Act I played the Ocarina of Time 3DS remake last year and it still holds up amazingly well... and there are some new features that make it even better like being able to switch tunics on the touchscreen
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Jul 17, 2019 14:32
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i had a lot of flying dreams where i was on a vacation last night is that a yearning for freedom or what
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Jul 17, 2019 14:38
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