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Zeniel
Oct 18, 2013
It was HP Lovecraft it couldnt have been more than a handful of pages back either.

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Suspect Bucket
Jan 15, 2012

SHRIMPDOR WAS A MAN
I mean, HE WAS A SHRIMP MAN
er, maybe also A DRAGON
or possibly
A MINOR LEAGUE BASEBALL TEAM
BUT HE WAS STILL
SHRIMPDOR

Zeniel posted:

It was HP Lovecraft it couldnt have been more than a handful of pages back either.

Well hey now it was in fact five pages ago, you win a prize.

Barry Bluejeans
Feb 2, 2017

ATTENTHUN THITIZENTH

on today's episode of magistrate judith

Alhazred
Feb 16, 2011




https://twitter.com/garius/status/1149625650711388160

Azhais
Feb 5, 2007
Switchblade Switcharoo

That Quincy ME article linked at the end is also a pretty solid thread candidate

https://medium.com/@garius/how-quincy-m-e-changed-medical-history-7c57b629a0b4

Red Bones
Aug 9, 2012

"I think he's a bad enough person to stay ghost through his sheer love of child-killing."

Azhais posted:

That Quincy ME article linked at the end is also a pretty solid thread candidate

https://medium.com/@garius/how-quincy-m-e-changed-medical-history-7c57b629a0b4

There's a good 99% Invisible episode on this, iirc. One of the funny parts of it is people from that time misremembering the protest that happened on the Quincy ME episode as a real one.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised.
Anyone got any good Byzantine stories? I wonder how much is propaganda but then it's obvious that the ruling class of a crumbling empire are the most amazingly useless people on earth besides maybe high school counselors.

Trabant
Nov 26, 2011

All systems nominal.

Ghost Leviathan posted:

Anyone got any good Byzantine stories?

I do, but they're complicated and tough to follow.

I don't :v:

Molentik
Apr 30, 2013

Ghost Leviathan posted:

Anyone got any good Byzantine stories? I wonder how much is propaganda but then it's obvious that the ruling class of a crumbling empire are the most amazingly useless people on earth besides maybe high school counselors.

The Byzantine History podcast is very good.

Edgar Allen Ho
Apr 3, 2017

by sebmojo
Two Nestorian monks traveled to China and smuggled silkworm eggs back to Constantinople in hollow bamboo canes to break the Chinese monopoly on silk production.

Platystemon
Feb 13, 2012

BREADS
Theodora’s swan skit is pretty weird.

citybeatnik
Mar 1, 2013

You Are All
WEIRDOS




Been trying to find the proper text of it for a while but my favorite story of that time period is still that merchant who was complaining about how he couldn't buy wine or bread without having to sit through a theological argument.

Byzantine
Sep 1, 2007

Well, this one time me and Alexios were coming back from Trebizond...

Beachcomber
May 21, 2007

Another day in paradise.


Slippery Tilde

Trabant posted:

I do, but they're complicated and tough to follow.

I don't :v:

:golfclap:

StrixNebulosa
Feb 14, 2012

You cheated not only the game, but yourself.
But most of all, you cheated BABA

the film "Cops" featuring Buster Keaton: goat gland specialist
me: what is that
wikipedia: "John Romulus Brinkley was an American who fraudulently claimed to be a medical doctor who became known as the "goat-gland doctor" after he achieved national fame, international notoriety and great wealth through the xenotransplantation of goat testicles into humans."

Samovar
Jun 4, 2011

I'm 😤 not a 🦸🏻‍♂️hero...🧜🏻



A satisfactory picture from history:

https://twitter.com/Chinchillazllla/status/1153127915669872640

SomeDrunkenMick
Apr 21, 2008


Schadenfreude

Alhazred
Feb 16, 2011




Ghost Leviathan posted:

Anyone got any good Byzantine stories? I wonder how much is propaganda but then it's obvious that the ruling class of a crumbling empire are the most amazingly useless people on earth besides maybe high school counselors.

Procopius describing the byzantine empress Theodora:
Often, even in the theatre, in the sight of all the people, she removed her costume and stood nude in their midst, except for a girdle about the groin: not that she was abashed at revealing that, too, to the audience, but because there was a law against appearing altogether naked on the stage, without at least this much of a fig-leaf. Covered thus with a ribbon, she would sink down to the stage floor and recline on her back. Slaves to whom the duty was entrusted would then scatter grains of barley from above into the calyx of this passion flower, whence geese, trained for the purpose, would next pick the grains one by one with their bills and eat.

JesustheDarkLord
May 22, 2006

#VolsDeep
Lipstick Apathy

I wonder if they made them sing Happy Birthday

InediblePenguin
Sep 27, 2004

I'm strong. And a giant penguin. Please don't eat me. No, really. Don't try.

Alhazred posted:

Procopius describing the byzantine empress Theodora:
Often, even in the theatre, in the sight of all the people, she removed her costume and stood nude in their midst, except for a girdle about the groin: not that she was abashed at revealing that, too, to the audience, but because there was a law against appearing altogether naked on the stage, without at least this much of a fig-leaf. Covered thus with a ribbon, she would sink down to the stage floor and recline on her back. Slaves to whom the duty was entrusted would then scatter grains of barley from above into the calyx of this passion flower, whence geese, trained for the purpose, would next pick the grains one by one with their bills and eat.

i feel like this is the equivalent of weird right wing articles about alexandria ocasio-cortez' supposed degeneracies

Alhazred
Feb 16, 2011




InediblePenguin posted:

i feel like this is the equivalent of weird right wing articles about alexandria ocasio-cortez' supposed degeneracies

Pretty much. And historians did this a lot. One historian wrote about how Claudius' wife would go to brothels and hold contests about how many men she could service.

A story from Byzantium that's supposedly true is that Harald Hardråde, leader of the varangaian guard, had a crush on empress Zoe and once asked for one of her pubes.

Proteus Jones
Feb 28, 2013



Also, isn't there an idea that Secret History written as kind of a hedge in case Justinian was overthrown by conspirators? As "look I secretly hated and loathed them all along so don't kill me too".

Of course there's always the option that he was sort of a proto-incel.

Biplane
Jul 18, 2005




Against my better judgement I checked out the comments and of course there’s a dude standing up for the helpless SS.

Edgar Allen Ho
Apr 3, 2017

by sebmojo
When people stan the Wehrmacht there's a chance that they're just mislead by the still-pervasive clean Wehrmacht myth but when you go to bat for concentration camp guarding SS, well

Byzantine
Sep 1, 2007

Secret History also says Justinian killed a trillion people and his head would detach at night and haunt the palace.

CharlestheHammer
Jun 26, 2011

YOU SAY MY POSTS ARE THE RAVINGS OF THE DUMBEST PERSON ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH BUT YOU YOURSELF ARE READING THEM. CURIOUS!
Secret history is just him venting.

He hates The emperor for some reason and the empress because she’s a loving whore who didn’t know her place god drat it

He was a weird little dude

drrockso20
May 6, 2013

Has Not Actually Done Cocaine

Alhazred posted:

Pretty much. And historians did this a lot. One historian wrote about how Claudius' wife would go to brothels and hold contests about how many men she could service.

A story from Byzantium that's supposedly true is that Harald Hardråde, leader of the varangaian guard, had a crush on empress Zoe and once asked for one of her pubes.

Apparently that is an incredibly ancient warrior tradition that appears in many different cultures, and still showed up as recently as WW2

Or at least that's what someone explained to me when a similar thing appeared in a Sci-Fi novel I read once

Edgar Allen Ho
Apr 3, 2017

by sebmojo

drrockso20 posted:

Apparently that is an incredibly ancient warrior tradition that appears in many different cultures, and still showed up as recently as WW2

Or at least that's what someone explained to me when a similar thing appeared in a Sci-Fi novel I read once

It originated when Gimli Gloinsson requested the hair of Galadriel Lady of Lorien

drrockso20
May 6, 2013

Has Not Actually Done Cocaine

Edgar Allen Ho posted:

It originated when Gimli Gloinsson requested the hair of Galadriel Lady of Lorien

Apparently that was Tolkien referencing that trope

Kennel
May 1, 2008

BAWWW-UNH!
He had to change it a bit because elves don't have pubes (that's canon).

hard counter
Jan 2, 2015





it's my understanding that it's a kind of memorabilia thing from eras before photographs were cheap and common - hair is durable and takes a while to decay - and number of different cultures have converged on the idea of exchanging locks of hair to keep a memento of someone or to affirm a relationship in a way where you can always keep someone close to your person... it would be common for anyone leaving someone for an extended time, not just for soldiers leaving on campaign

on a more platonic level, in the west until ~a hundred years ago it wouldn't have been outrageously uncommon for someone's grandparents to leave behind locks of hair to their descendants to remember them when they pass on or for an important figure on their deathbed to divvy up some hairs for display purposes

Alhazred
Feb 16, 2011




drrockso20 posted:

Apparently that is an incredibly ancient warrior tradition that appears in many different cultures, and still showed up as recently as WW2

Or at least that's what someone explained to me when a similar thing appeared in a Sci-Fi novel I read once

I really doubt that that WW2 soldiers walked around with pubic hairs in their pockets.

Phy
Jun 27, 2008



Fun Shoe
If they did it was Jonesy's pubes from Seventh platoon, he's a real prankster that Jonesy

Biplane
Jul 18, 2005

Alhazred posted:

I really doubt that that WW2 soldiers walked around with pubic hairs in their pockets.

that's probably the least grody thing in a WW2 soldiers pocket, my man.

christmas boots
Oct 15, 2012

To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻‍♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out
Biscuit Hider

Alhazred posted:

I really doubt that that WW2 soldiers walked around with pubic hairs in their pockets.

Where would you keep them?

girl dick energy
Sep 30, 2009

You think you have the wherewithal to figure out my puzzle vagina?
stuck between my teeth usually

FreudianSlippers
Apr 12, 2010

Shooting and Fucking
are the same thing!

Dudes were cleaning the meat off Japanese skulls and sending them home to the folks so they could use them as bookstops and ashtrays.

Pubes are pretty tame compared to trophy skulls.

Ghost Leviathan
Mar 2, 2017

Exploration is ill-advised.
Pubes for the pube throne!

Sulla Faex
May 14, 2010

No man ever did me so much good, or enemy so much harm, but I repaid him with ENDLESS SHITPOSTING

FreudianSlippers posted:

Dudes were cleaning the meat off Japanese skulls and sending them home to the folks so they could use them as bookstops and ashtrays.

Pubes are pretty tame compared to trophy skulls.

i checked the catalogue and it turns out the price of freedom is a whole bunch of war crimes

mutilated skulls will get you.. not freedom, but a few cute islands in the pacific

:shrug:

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Alhazred
Feb 16, 2011




I still doubt that carrying pubes around is an ancient warrior tradition.

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