- Junpei
- Oct 4, 2015
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Can't post for 11 years!
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Money!
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Jul 20, 2019 05:07
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 13, 2024 00:10
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2_JTzEppKy8
quote:
“Wait!” you cry out, kicking and squirming inside the spiderweb. “Wait! Let me go – please! I’ll make it worth your while.”
The army captain strokes his chin.
“Really?” he asks, sounding interested.
“Sure,” you answer eagerly. “Anything! I’ll give you anything. What do you want?”
“What have you got?” the captain asks.
Hmmm. Good question. What have you got?
“How about my old toys and games?” you offer weakly.
“Games? Toys? Are you kidding?! Ha!” The captain sweeps his arm toward the overflowing warehouse.
All the soldiers start laughing and slapping their knees. Even the ninjas chuckle.
“Turn on the machines!” the captain commands with a little wave of his hand.
“Wait! How about a bag of chocolate gold coins? A million dollars in Monopoly money?” you try.
But it’s no use. The conveyor belt is moving again. You ride closer and closer to the hole-punching machine.
THWACK. KA-CHUNK!
quote:
“Heeeeeelp!” You kick and scream, struggling to get free.
In a burst of strength, you break your arms and legs out of the sticky web!
But it’s too late. Two huge mechanical arms move in to hold you in place. A large, flat panel slides under your back, then bends, forcing you to sit up. A bowl-shaped thing whirs into place over your head.
You squint your eyes and grit your teeth. Any minute now the hole-punching should begin...
Then you catch your reflection in the shiny machine.
Hey! The bowl-shaped thing above you is a giant plastic doll scalp! You watch, horrified, as the machine lowers it on your head. Then it fits the plastic doll’s face over yours, molding it into place! You can see through the eye slits.
The machine molds plastic arms and legs around your own. Soon you’re covered in plastic.
They’re turning you into a life-sized doll!
quote:
THWACK. KA-CHUNK! THWACK. KA-CHUNK!
You feel the machine poking holes in your new plastic scalp, and punching in new strands of hair.
You catch another glimpse of yourself in the mirror. Your mouth is curved into a permanent smile. Your red plastic lips are slightly open.
Yuck!
You’re a doll! A dopey, smiling, life-sized doll.
Nasty Kathy strolls up to you as you sit there on the conveyor belt.
“So,” she snarls. “Now you’re one of us. Are you going to help us with our plan – or not?”
Well? What do you want to do?
If you agree to join Nasty Kathy's army, turn to PAGE 105.
If you don't want to help the toys, turn to PAGE 27.
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Disk Key
Goal Endings: 1/2
Bad Endings
Shot with a freeze ray while our chatterbox friend tied up the phone line.
Ran home to get a camcorder and missed the entire tour.
Got caught by Bobaloo and thrown out of an airplane.
Failed a secret commercial audition and got booted from the factory.
Distracted Bobaloo while being kidnapped and steered the car we were in straight off a cliff.
Stuck on battery-charging duty for a secret army of toys.
Kicked out of the book for being too trusting.
Arrested by toy policemen and forced into a tiny toy police car.
Tripped onto some army men and impaled ourselves on hundreds of tiny bayonets.
Achievements
Better Sooner Than Annihi-later: Got rid of the Annihilator 3000 at the earliest possible opportunity.
Rock You Like a Hurricane: Let Mother Nature dispose of the Annihilator 3000 for us.
Planned Obsolescence: Watched the Annihilator 3000 get destroyed by an upgraded model.
Nice Shootin', Tex!: Destroyed the Annihilator 3000 by causing more collateral damage than it could manage in its wildest dreams.
Hard Light: Learned that the toys in the warehouse were just harmless holograms. Definitely just holograms. Don't question it.
Rebonack7 fucked around with this message at 23:58 on Jul 21, 2019
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Jul 20, 2019 15:41
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- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
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Welp, may as well follow our nature and join the army
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Jul 20, 2019 17:00
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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quote:
“Okay,” you tell Nasty Kathy. “I’ll join you.”
You don’t think about it for more than a minute. What other choice do you have? You’re a toy now.
Actually, you think, it’s kind of cool being a doll! Your plastic body is tough. You’ll never have to worry about mosquito bites again. Or sunburns.
And best of all, now you finally get to find out about the toys’ mysterious plan!
“Welcome aboard,” Nasty Kathy says, shaking your hand. “Okay, here’s the deal...”
quote:
“We toys are on a mission,” Nasty Kathy explains. “A mission to stamp out toy abuse!”
“Huh?” You stare at her. “You mean you’re not going to take over the world?”
Nasty Kathy snorts. “Don’t be dumb! What would we do that for? No, we just want to make the world a little better for toys. To stop kids from ripping the eyes off their teddy bears, pulling off their dolls’ heads, stuff like that. That’s why we’re making all the police dolls. Someone has to control these kids!”
“Oh...” you murmur, and trail off.
You feel kind of let down. You were expecting to hear something more exciting. Something more adventurous.
But you promised to help out. “Count me in,” you declare. “What do you want me to do?”
Nasty Kathy grins, showing her pointed teeth.
You shiver. Even though you’re on her side now, she’s still kind of scary.
“You’re going to be our demonstration doll!” she announces.
quote:
On Monday morning, you and Officer Murphy, the toy policeman, arrive at your school for a special assembly.
When he is introduced, Officer Murphy glares sternly at the kids in the audience. “Children,” he booms, “I’m here to show you some things that you should never do to your toys. Like this.”
He tugs you to the front of the stage.
Then he pulls out a big black Magic Marker and scribbles all over your face!
“Hey!” you protest, spitting out ink. “Cut it out!”
“Or this,” Officer Murphy continues as if you hadn’t spoken.
He grabs you by the hair and drags you around the stage.
“Ow!” you yell. “Stop it! Ouch!”
“And never, ever let your pets get hold of your toys,” Officer Murphy adds. “Like this!” He presses a remote control.
Barking furiously, Mittens, the mechanical Doberman, races across the stage and attacks your leg.
Hey – remember those crash test dummies they use to test cars? That’s what you are now. So do the smart thing. Close the book.
And next time you read it, try not to be a dummy!
THE END
It seems like every GYGB book has at least one ending designed to make you stop and think "Huh, this probably planted the seeds for someone's weird fetish years down the line".
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Disk Key
Goal Endings: 1/2
Bad Endings
Shot with a freeze ray while our chatterbox friend tied up the phone line.
Ran home to get a camcorder and missed the entire tour.
Got caught by Bobaloo and thrown out of an airplane.
Failed a secret commercial audition and got booted from the factory.
Distracted Bobaloo while being kidnapped and steered the car we were in straight off a cliff.
Stuck on battery-charging duty for a secret army of toys.
Kicked out of the book for being too trusting.
Arrested by toy policemen and forced into a tiny toy police car.
Tripped onto some army men and impaled ourselves on hundreds of tiny bayonets.
 Turned into a living doll and used as a demonstration dummy for toy abuse seminars.
Achievements
Better Sooner Than Annihi-later: Got rid of the Annihilator 3000 at the earliest possible opportunity.
Rock You Like a Hurricane: Let Mother Nature dispose of the Annihilator 3000 for us.
Planned Obsolescence: Watched the Annihilator 3000 get destroyed by an upgraded model.
Nice Shootin', Tex!: Destroyed the Annihilator 3000 by causing more collateral damage than it could manage in its wildest dreams.
Hard Light: Learned that the toys in the warehouse were just harmless holograms. Definitely just holograms. Don't question it.
Our options posted:
- Make a pit stop in Aisle Three.
- Ignore the hand and take the key from the lock.
- Pretend to be a toy.
- Refuse to help the toys.
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Jul 22, 2019 00:05
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- Blueberry Pancakes
- Aug 18, 2012
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Jack in!! MegaMan, Execute!
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Pretend to be a toy.
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Jul 22, 2019 01:19
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- rudecyrus
- Nov 6, 2009
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fuck you trolls
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Make a pit stop
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Jul 22, 2019 05:57
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- Android Blues
- Nov 22, 2008
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Aisle three!
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Jul 22, 2019 09:07
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- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
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Refuse to help the toys
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Jul 22, 2019 15:30
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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quote:
You zoom around the corner and head into Aisle Three.
It’s crowded with toys, open boxes, and assorted junk.
With the dim emergency lights barely glowing overhead, you can’t really see what’s going on.
You squint. It looks as if the toys have set up a barricade.
What is that large lump at the end of the aisle? That thing lying on the floor, near the glass wall...
Oh, man. You’ve just it figured out.
“Benny!” you shout.
Benny is tied up with about a dozen jump ropes. He looks like a giant lying on his back, with dozens of tiny soldiers standing on his chest.
“Help me!” he shouts. “Hurry! They’re crawling all over me!”
You run toward Benny.
Then you hear the sound you’ve been expecting... and dreading!
SQUISH. FLAP. SQUISH. FLAP.
quote:
That sucking sound. It can only mean one thing.
The Zorgs are on your trail!
Frantically, you scan the shelves near you. Hunting for a Laser Blaster – or anything. Some kind of weapon so you can defend yourself against the face-rippers.
You fling aside boxes of video-game cartridges. There’s lots of cool stuff you’d love to try out.
But you can’t find a weapon!
The Zorgs scuttle forward, their green eyes glowing in the dark. They’re close enough to leap...
You can almost feel their claws ripping into you. And the stinging purple ooze from their tongues...
In a panic, you grab the nearest thing – a package of walkie-talkies. You tear off the wrapping, stuff one walkie-talkie into the waistband of your jeans, and hurl the other at your friend.
“Benny! Catch!” you shout.
“I can’t!” Benny cries.
Oops! You forgot. His hands are tied.
The walkie-talkie bounces off Benny’s stomach and clatters into a corner.
The Zorgs are coming faster. You head for the doll aisle.
This takes us to the doll aisle anyway, but at least we got an extra item out of it this time!
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Walkie-Talkie
Goal Endings: 1/2
Bad Endings
Shot with a freeze ray while our chatterbox friend tied up the phone line.
Ran home to get a camcorder and missed the entire tour.
Got caught by Bobaloo and thrown out of an airplane.
Failed a secret commercial audition and got booted from the factory.
Distracted Bobaloo while being kidnapped and steered the car we were in straight off a cliff.
Stuck on battery-charging duty for a secret army of toys.
Kicked out of the book for being too trusting.
Arrested by toy policemen and forced into a tiny toy police car.
Tripped onto some army men and impaled ourselves on hundreds of tiny bayonets.
Turned into a living doll and used as a demonstration dummy for toy abuse seminars.
Achievements
Better Sooner Than Annihi-later: Got rid of the Annihilator 3000 at the earliest possible opportunity.
Rock You Like a Hurricane: Let Mother Nature dispose of the Annihilator 3000 for us.
Planned Obsolescence: Watched the Annihilator 3000 get destroyed by an upgraded model.
Nice Shootin', Tex!: Destroyed the Annihilator 3000 by causing more collateral damage than it could manage in its wildest dreams.
Hard Light: Learned that the toys in the warehouse were just harmless holograms. Definitely just holograms. Don't question it.
Our options posted:
- Ignore the hand and take the key from the lock.
- Pretend to be a toy.
- Refuse to help the toys.
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Jul 26, 2019 00:48
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- rudecyrus
- Nov 6, 2009
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fuck you trolls
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Refuse to help
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Jul 26, 2019 04:54
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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Pretend to be a toy.
This thread got me curious about Goosebumps mobile games, so I tried out the most recent one. About 15 minutes in...
For one of the least effective monsters in the entire series, the Annihilator gets a surprising number of appearances in spin-off games.
quote:
“No way!” you shout at Nasty Kathy. “I may look like a doll, but I’m still human! I won’t help you toys take over my world!”
You slide off the conveyor belt. Your doll body feels stiff and geeky. Your legs won’t bend – they just swing like boards.
You run clumsily to a phone. With your plastic fingers, you frantically dial your house. When your mom answers, you quickly explain to her that you and Benny are trapped in the toy factory.
“Come get us – fast!” you tell her.
Your mom arrives with Benny’s dad and two police officers. All the toys in the factory freeze. All except for you, that is.
“Mom!” you cry, jumping up and down. “Benny’s tied up with jump ropes and they turned me into a toy!”
But instead of running to you, your mom starts screaming.
“What did you do with my child?” she cries.
“Don’t worry, ma’am. We’ll find the kid,” one of the policemen says.
“We got a tip that there was something fishy going on with life-sized dolls in this factory,” the other officer says. “Looks like this one is the leader.”
Then the officers snap handcuffs onto your plastic wrists!
quote:
They put you under arrest for impersonating a human.
It’s a serious crime. But because it’s your first offense, the judge lets you off easy. Instead of going to jail, you just have to do community service.
Your sentence? Two months as the guest star on the Dudley the Purple Dragon TV show.
It’s pretty embarrassing to be on the Dudley show. You even have to sing the stupid Dudley song. But after your two months are up, you stay on to make a little money. You’re saving up so you can afford the expensive surgery to have your plastic doll shell removed.
Hey. They don’t call them “plastic” surgeons for nothing, you know!
THE END
Look on the bright side: having the doll mask stuck over our head means we can't accidentally traumatize a live studio audience of children by ripping our head off in front of them!
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Walkie-Talkie
Disk Key
Goal Endings: 1/2
Bad Endings
Shot with a freeze ray while our chatterbox friend tied up the phone line.
Ran home to get a camcorder and missed the entire tour.
Got caught by Bobaloo and thrown out of an airplane.
Failed a secret commercial audition and got booted from the factory.
Distracted Bobaloo while being kidnapped and steered the car we were in straight off a cliff.
Stuck on battery-charging duty for a secret army of toys.
Kicked out of the book for being too trusting.
Arrested by toy policemen and forced into a tiny toy police car.
Tripped onto some army men and impaled ourselves on hundreds of tiny bayonets.
Turned into a living doll and used as a demonstration dummy for toy abuse seminars.
Turned into a living doll and forced to work as a guest star on a Barney knock-off show.
Achievements
Better Sooner Than Annihi-later: Got rid of the Annihilator 3000 at the earliest possible opportunity.
Rock You Like a Hurricane: Let Mother Nature dispose of the Annihilator 3000 for us.
Planned Obsolescence: Watched the Annihilator 3000 get destroyed by an upgraded model.
Nice Shootin', Tex!: Destroyed the Annihilator 3000 by causing more collateral damage than it could manage in its wildest dreams.
Hard Light: Learned that the toys in the warehouse were just harmless holograms. Definitely just holograms. Don't question it.
Our options posted:
- Ignore the hand and take the key from the lock.
- Pretend to be a toy.
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Jul 27, 2019 20:18
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- Blueberry Pancakes
- Aug 18, 2012
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Jack in!! MegaMan, Execute!
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Pretend to be a toy!
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Jul 27, 2019 21:56
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- Junpei
- Oct 4, 2015
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Can't post for 11 years!
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Pretend to be a toy
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Jul 28, 2019 16:47
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- Lurker Above
- Jun 17, 2014
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W_7WIt9A9gA
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Jul 28, 2019 23:22
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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Hope you're ready for two item checks in a row!
quote:
There must be a way you can fool the toys into thinking you’re one of them...
“Wait!” you cry as the soldiers dangle you over the belt. “You can’t do this to me. I’m a toy too!”
Will they believe you? You’re nearly choked with fear. The sound of the hair-planting machine makes your scalp crawl.
A few of the soldiers look uncertain. But the captain just laughs. “That’s a lie,” he declares. “Put the kid on the belt.”
But some of the ninjas – the ones you saw making the robot police officer – rush in to help. One of them turns off the hair-planting machine.
“Maybe the kid is telling the truth. Maybe it’s really a doll,” another ninja warrior says.
“Ridiculous,” the captain snaps. “Start up the machine.”
The ninja hesitates, unsure. You gaze at him with pleading eyes.
“Please! Believe me,” you plead. “I’m a toy.”
“Prove it,” the ninja replies. “Let’s see your batteries.”
quote:
Prove it?
Your heart sinks. How can you prove you’re a toy? You don’t have any batteries.
But wait! Maybe you do have a chance after all.
Did you stop in Aisle Three before going to the doll aisle?
If you did, you’ll have something tucked into the waistband of your jeans.
Something with a battery pack...
Something you can use to fool the toys!
Well?
No cheating, now...
Because we’ll catch you.
If you stopped in Aisle Three, you know what you picked up.
Is it a walkie-talkie? If so, turn to PAGE 81.
Is it a handheld video game? If so, turn to PAGE 125.
For whatever reason, the book doesn't give us the option to just admit it if we didn't stop by Aisle Three, so I wouldn't be surprised if more than a few readers guessed their way through this choice by accident. Not that it matters to us. We stopped in Aisle Three, so we know the item we need is a walkie-talkie!
quote:
The walkie-talkie in your waistband! It has batteries. You could pretend they’re yours. You’re saved!
The problem is, how can you reach the walkie-talkie with your arms tied?
Meanwhile, one of the ninjas takes off your shoes and socks. He moves his little fingers around on the bottom of your feet. It tickles!
But you don’t feel like laughing.
“The kid lied!” the ninja shouts. “There’s nothing here but skin!”
“Wait!” you yell. “I am a toy! I keep my batteries in a different place. If you cut one of my arms free, I’ll show you!”
“ENOUGH!” the army captain commands. “Shut the kid up!”
One of the soldiers aims a web-gun at you. It only takes one squirt. Right over your mouth. The sticky spiderweb spray oozes down your cheeks and silences you. You can barely breathe.
Nasty Kathy walks back over. She flips the ON switches for the conveyor belt and the hair-planting machine.
THWACK. KA-CHUNK! THWACK KA-CHUNK!
quote:
THWACK. KA-CHUNK. THWACK...
You squeeze your eyes shut. Any second now, mechanical arms are going to swoop down, poke holes in your head, and stuff it full of doll hair!
Then, suddenly, something incredible happens.
A voice comes out of the walkie-talkie in the waistband of your jeans. It’s muffled, but everyone can hear it.
“Don’t hurt me,” a small, high-pitched voice says. “Please believe me. I’m a toy!”
That voice. You recognize it.
It’s the pig!
The head ninja runs over to the switch and stops the hair-planting machine. “The voice came out of its stomach!” the ninja cries. “A human can’t do that!”
“It must be a toy!” another ninja shouts.
“Of course I’m a toy,” the pig’s voice answers. “Let me go!”
The pig must have found the other walkie-talkie near Benny!
Silently, you promise never to eat another slice of bacon as long as you live.
Three ninjas jump onto the conveyor belt.
And bring their swords flashing down at your head!
quote:
You stare in horror at the flashing swords.
They sweep down on you...
And slice away the Instant Spiderweb that’s tying you down!
A few seconds later, you’re free.
You hop off the conveyor belt and open your mouth to say, “Thanks.” But just then your walkie-talkie crackles to life again.
“Thank you for helping me,” the voice in the walkie-talkie declares. “And now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got something important to do. In the warehouse – Aisle One.”
“Sorry about that,” the army captain mutters. “We were just following orders.”
“You should think before you follow orders,” the pig scolds through the walkie-talkie.
You smile to yourself as you hurry toward the glass wall. Then in through the glass door. Toward Aisle One.
Inside the door, you see Benny still on the floor, still tied up with jump ropes. Right where the soldiers left him.
Only he’s just lying there, curled up. Completely still.
Is he even breathing?
“Benny!” you call out. “Benny!”
quote:
Benny turns over with a start. “It’s you!” he says. “I thought you were those horrible soldiers for a minute. Cut me loose!”
“Sorry, Benny. I can’t take the time,” you apologize, rushing off toward Aisle One. “There’s something else I’ve got to do first!”
You race to Aisle One, the learning toys aisle.
That’s what the pig meant, isn’t it? That you should go there?
But now what?
Now what do you do with the key?
Well... that depends.
Which key do you have?
If you have the silver key to Nasty Kathy's trunk, turn to PAGE 96.
If you found a different key inside the trunk, turn to PAGE 121.
Lucky for us, we brought the key we need - well, technically the disk we need, but no need to be pedantic.
quote:
You’ve got the computer disk in your pocket. The one you found inside Nasty Kathy’s trunk.
And you remember where the rubber hand told you to put it. In the Incredible Talking Spelling Thinking Intelligent Machine.
Your heart pounds as you race down the aisle.
Frantically, your eyes scan every box, every toy on the shelf. Puzzles. Reading games. Math machines. Mazes. Alphabet games.
Everything but a Talking Speller!
“Where is it?” you cry out in frustration.
The pig’s voice suddenly bursts out of the walkie-talkie in your waistband. “IT’S TIM!” the pig yells.
Huh? It’s Tim?
Who’s Tim?
quote:
You don’t get it. Why is the pig yelling about someone named Tim?
Then you catch sight of it. And it all makes sense.
Incredible Talking Spelling Thinking Intelligent Machine.
A red plastic toy, shaped like a book. And the first letter of each word spells out IT’S TIM!
You are about to insert the disk – when you hear Benny’s voice. From two aisles over. He sounds terrified.
“Don’t do it!” he cries. “Whatever you do, don’t put the key in IT’S TIM!”
How does Benny know what you’re doing? Did he figure it out from the soldiers? Does he know something you don’t know?
He’s your friend. Should you listen to him?
If you do, you might miss your chance to turn off the toys. You can hear Nasty Kathy’s voice nearby. She’s coming. She must have heard the pig yell, “It’s Tim!”
And if she catches you, this time you might not get away!
“Please! Don’t!” Benny cries. “If only you knew –“
Well?
If you put the key in IT'S TIM, turn to PAGE 43.
If you want to find out what Benny knows, run over to PAGE 68.
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Walkie-Talkie
Disk Key
Goal Endings: 1/2
Bad Endings
Shot with a freeze ray while our chatterbox friend tied up the phone line.
Ran home to get a camcorder and missed the entire tour.
Got caught by Bobaloo and thrown out of an airplane.
Failed a secret commercial audition and got booted from the factory.
Distracted Bobaloo while being kidnapped and steered the car we were in straight off a cliff.
Stuck on battery-charging duty for a secret army of toys.
Kicked out of the book for being too trusting.
Arrested by toy policemen and forced into a tiny toy police car.
Tripped onto some army men and impaled ourselves on hundreds of tiny bayonets.
Turned into a living doll and used as a demonstration dummy for toy abuse seminars.
Turned into a living doll and forced to work as a guest star on a Barney knock-off show.
Achievements
Better Sooner Than Annihi-later: Got rid of the Annihilator 3000 at the earliest possible opportunity.
Rock You Like a Hurricane: Let Mother Nature dispose of the Annihilator 3000 for us.
Planned Obsolescence: Watched the Annihilator 3000 get destroyed by an upgraded model.
Nice Shootin', Tex!: Destroyed the Annihilator 3000 by causing more collateral damage than it could manage in its wildest dreams.
Hard Light: Learned that the toys in the warehouse were just harmless holograms. Definitely just holograms. Don't question it.
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Jul 29, 2019 02:11
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- Leraika
- Jun 14, 2015
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Luckily, I *did* save your old avatar. Fucked around and found out indeed.
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Let's trust the pig some more
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Jul 29, 2019 02:17
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- Blueberry Pancakes
- Aug 18, 2012
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Jack in!! MegaMan, Execute!
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Let's trust the pig.
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Jul 29, 2019 03:14
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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We can always go back and help Benny once we don't have an army of brain-eating aliens breathing down our neck, right?
quote:
You decide to go ahead and stick the computer disk in IT’S TIM.
You’ve got to. The pig said you’d never get out of here alive if you didn’t!
You cram the disk into the slot in the back of the Incredible Talking Spelling Thinking Intelligent Machine.
SFFFFFFZZTT!
A flash of white-hot light nearly blinds you.
Then you hear a terrible hum. A hum so loud, you feel your bones shake.
Then silence.
You open your eyes. And gasp.
All the toys are... dead! Or, really, they’re just toys again. They’re not moving. Or breathing. Or talking.
For a moment, it seems strange. You were getting used to them. And you were getting downright fond of that little pig.
Then you snap out of it. And run over to find Benny in the action toys aisle.
Hey. How come he’s just lying there? Stiff?
“Benny?” you call as you race toward him. “It’s safe now.”
You gasp when you get close enough to see his feet.
quote:
Benny’s left shoe is off. You stare at his foot in horror.
In the heel is a battery compartment. Just like the compartment in the police doll’s foot.
Suddenly you understand why Benny didn’t want you to put the key in IT’S TIM. He knew that if you turned off the toys, you’d turn him off too. Because he wasn’t really alive.
He was running on batteries.
Benny is a doll too!
“I’m sorry,” you say to Benny, standing over him sadly.
Then you realize something.
You’re talking to a doll!
You feel bad about Benny. But after all, you hadn’t known him very long. And you did always think he was kind of weird.
Oh, well, you think as you walk out of the factory. At least you didn’t get zapped by Nasty Kathy.
You start to pedal your bike home. But suddenly you’re hit with a horrible thought.
If Benny was a doll – who else is a toy too?
Your father? Your mother? Your best friend?
Guess you’d better start reading again. Until you find out the answer to that, you haven’t really come to
THE END...
Or not. Figures one of these books would pick now to be internally consistent.
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Walkie-Talkie
Disk Key
Goal Endings: 1/2
Bad Endings
Shot with a freeze ray while our chatterbox friend tied up the phone line.
Ran home to get a camcorder and missed the entire tour.
Got caught by Bobaloo and thrown out of an airplane.
Failed a secret commercial audition and got booted from the factory.
Distracted Bobaloo while being kidnapped and steered the car we were in straight off a cliff.
Stuck on battery-charging duty for a secret army of toys.
Kicked out of the book for being too trusting.
Arrested by toy policemen and forced into a tiny toy police car.
Tripped onto some army men and impaled ourselves on hundreds of tiny bayonets.
Turned into a living doll and used as a demonstration dummy for toy abuse seminars.
Turned into a living doll and forced to work as a guest star on a Barney knock-off show.
Achievements
Better Sooner Than Annihi-later: Got rid of the Annihilator 3000 at the earliest possible opportunity.
Rock You Like a Hurricane: Let Mother Nature dispose of the Annihilator 3000 for us.
Planned Obsolescence: Watched the Annihilator 3000 get destroyed by an upgraded model.
Nice Shootin', Tex!: Destroyed the Annihilator 3000 by causing more collateral damage than it could manage in its wildest dreams.
Hard Light: Learned that the toys in the warehouse were just harmless holograms. Definitely just holograms. Don't question it.
This is the End, Friend: Escaped the Hasley Toy Factory, but killed off the helpful toys in the process.
Our options posted:
- Ignore the hand and take the key from the lock.
- Lie and say we got a handheld game from Aisle Three.
- Check with Benny before turning off the toys.
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Jul 29, 2019 19:56
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- rudecyrus
- Nov 6, 2009
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fuck you trolls
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We totally got a handheld game
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Jul 30, 2019 05:07
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- PumpkinBat
- Oct 22, 2012
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That's a surprisingly poignant and human scene with our protagonist standing over his lifeless friend, expressing sadness even though Benny was a toy.
Also, what on Earth is Kathy doing to these toys that not one but two toys are willing to face oblivion just to escape her torment?
Let's see how far the internal consistency goes and check if Benny's still a toy in this timeline.
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Jul 30, 2019 15:18
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- Blueberry Pancakes
- Aug 18, 2012
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Jack in!! MegaMan, Execute!
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Check with Benny!
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Jul 30, 2019 15:42
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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quote:
You decide to listen to your friend.
He sounds so certain. And so desperate!
You hurry to the aisle where Benny is tied up.
“Untie me,” he shouts. “Just do as I say.”
You untie the jump ropes that hold him down. As soon as he’s free, he jumps to his feet.
“What’s going on?” you ask. “How did you know –“
“No time for that now. Just listen to me.”
Benny seems so different. So in control.
He continues, “Run to Aisle One and get IT’S TIM. Bring it with you – no matter what. Then we’ve got to grab some more good stuff. I’ll get the computer games, a Laser Blaster, the hockey game, and a remote control car. You get whatever toys you want. Then run for your life and meet me at the front door.”
Your eyes widen. “What if I run into Nasty Kathy?”
“Just go!” Benny answers.
quote:
You dash to Aisle One. You grab IT’S TIM and load your arms with other cool toys as well. Then you spot the pig – he’s been following you up and down the aisles.
Why not? You tuck him under your arm. He grunts happily.
You snake around the edge of the warehouse and into the factory. You reach the front door.
“Hold it right there, you flesh freaks!” Nasty Kathy suddenly shouts over her megaphone.
You whip around. YIKES! She’s right behind you! And the Laser Blaster is pointed at your face!
Without hesitating, Benny tosses a hockey stick at Nasty Kathy. She ducks out of the way. Giving you just enough time to slip out of the factory and slam the door shut.
“We did it!” you cry.
“Get back here, humans!” Nasty Kathy shouts from inside.
Benny grabs IT’S TIM from you.
“Where’s the key?” he asks impatiently.
You hand him the computer disk, feeling confused. He shoves it into a slot in the back of the Talking Speller.
Instantly, there is a flash of blinding white light.
Then a loud hum that fades into silence.
quote:
You stare at Benny with wide eyes.
“What just happened?” you ask slowly.
“The toys went back to being just toys,” he explains. “At least all the ones inside the factory.”
“Huh?” you ask stupidly, your mouth hanging open.
“The toys we brought out are still alive,” he goes on. “That’s why I didn’t want you to put the key in IT’S TIM until we got out. I knew that every toy – and every life-sized doll – in the factory would go to sleep forever when you used the key.”
You blink. “I don’t get it,” you say. “You cared that much about keeping these toys alive?”
The pig under your arm squirms happily. “I’m glad you did, though,” you add, giving the pig an affectionate squeeze.
“The toys are cool.” Benny hesitates for a second. “But mostly I cared about keeping myself alive!”
“Keeping yourself alive?” you say. “What do you mean?”
Benny gazes solemnly at you.
“I’m going to tell you the truth,” he says. “I knew all about the living toys. And that they were making human-looking dolls to carry out a secret plan. Because I’m a doll!”
quote:
“What?” you sputter. “You’re a doll?”
Benny pulls off his shoe and shows you his foot.
There, in his heel, you see a battery pack!
You’re so amazed, you can’t speak. You just stare at him.
“If you had put the key in IT’S TIM while I was still inside the factory, I would have died,” Benny explains. “By the way, I’m the one who put your name on the list for the factory tour. I wanted you to see how cool the live toys were. I didn’t realize how dangerous it would be. Nasty Kathy turned so mean!”
You open your mouth, but for a few seconds you can only manage a faint croak. Finally your voice works.
“Okay, so you’re a toy. But what about this secret plan?” you ask him. “Why life-sized dolls?”
Then he gives you a small smile. “Oh, that’s a story for another day,” he tells you mysteriously.
He’s right, of course. It’s a story for another day – or another page. But for now, you’re happy to know that you’ve had some fun – and came out of it alive in
THE END.
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Walkie-Talkie
Disk Key
Goal Endings: 2/2
Bad Endings
Shot with a freeze ray while our chatterbox friend tied up the phone line.
Ran home to get a camcorder and missed the entire tour.
Got caught by Bobaloo and thrown out of an airplane.
Failed a secret commercial audition and got booted from the factory.
Distracted Bobaloo while being kidnapped and steered the car we were in straight off a cliff.
Stuck on battery-charging duty for a secret army of toys.
Kicked out of the book for being too trusting.
Arrested by toy policemen and forced into a tiny toy police car.
Tripped onto some army men and impaled ourselves on hundreds of tiny bayonets.
Turned into a living doll and used as a demonstration dummy for toy abuse seminars.
Turned into a living doll and forced to work as a guest star on a Barney knock-off show.
Achievements
Better Sooner Than Annihi-later: Got rid of the Annihilator 3000 at the earliest possible opportunity.
Rock You Like a Hurricane: Let Mother Nature dispose of the Annihilator 3000 for us.
Planned Obsolescence: Watched the Annihilator 3000 get destroyed by an upgraded model.
Nice Shootin', Tex!: Destroyed the Annihilator 3000 by causing more collateral damage than it could manage in its wildest dreams.
Hard Light: Learned that the toys in the warehouse were just harmless holograms. Definitely just holograms. Don't question it.
This is the End, Friend: Escaped the Hasley Toy Factory, but killed off the helpful toys in the process.
Whether Benny has the same plan as the toys from the other timeline or is up to something else altogether, we're finally done with this book! Next time, we go on a much-needed summer vacation, and I type the word "Tiki" a lot.
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Aug 1, 2019 03:39
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- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
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I love that even the book has our self-insert react to Benny being a toy with just a long, gaping silence and croaking noise.
Also the unironic serious repetition of IT’S TIM.
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Aug 1, 2019 04:33
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- Blueberry Pancakes
- Aug 18, 2012
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Jack in!! MegaMan, Execute!
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I wasn't expecting Benny to consistently be a toy.
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Aug 1, 2019 05:15
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- AceOfFlames
- Oct 9, 2012
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I wasn't expecting Benny to consistently be a toy.
Clearly Stein watched an Auton episode of Classic Doctor Who and took notes.
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Aug 1, 2019 11:25
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 13, 2024 00:10
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Jul 20, 2019 05:07
