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Parahexavoctal
Oct 10, 2004

I AM NOT BEING PAID TO CORRECT OTHER PEOPLE'S POSTS! DONKEY!!

no idea where the panels for this are - maybe one of you can find them.

(although they're not that visual)

Faiza Hussain is a doctor with healing powers such that she can take apart an organism and put it back together by force of will.

She and Dane 'Black Knight' Whitman are on an airplane that gets shot out of the sky. They are plummeting to the ground. They have no parachutes.

As they fall, she grabs him, and starts healing - herself, and him. Even though the injury hasn't happened yet. Over and over and over, heal, heal, heal, heal, HEAL, HEAL, HEAL, HEAL, HEAL HEAL HEAL HEAL HEALHEALHEALHEALHEALHEALHEALHEAL if she stops for even a second they'll both be killed

and they HIT THE GROUND

and in a fraction of a second, their bodies burst, all their bones are splintered, their brains are destroyed, their organs are pulped

but the healing is still going even in that fraction of a second

and their bones are shattered but not splintered and their organs are ruptured but not pulped

but she can't stop healing even though she's just suffered a mortal injury

she keeps healing

and the bones are broken but not shattered, the organs are lacerated but not ruptured

and she keeps healing

the bones are cracked but not broken, the organs are bruised but not lacerated

HEALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

and she just

keeps

healing...

....

... and they get up and walk away.

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Toshimo
Aug 23, 2012

He's outta line...

But he's right!

Parahexavoctal posted:

no idea where the panels for this are - maybe one of you can find them.



Captain Britain and MI13 #11

Zore
Sep 21, 2010
willfully illiterate, aggressively miserable sourpuss whose sole raison d’etre is to put other people down for liking the wrong things

ImpAtom posted:

In any universe but 616 it is to be called Spiderman

More specifically to be named Peter Parker.

He dies in just about every What-If, alternate future or alternate universe. Even with the Spider-verse stuff you have more characters running around piloting Peter's dead corpse (Spiders-Man, Superior, that one Venom spiderman that ate his body) than living Peters.

Discendo Vox
Mar 21, 2013

We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.
If mjolnir is sentient and went to a bar, who would be able to pick it up there

hiddenriverninja
May 10, 2013

life is locomotion
keep moving
trust that you'll find your way

Discendo Vox posted:

If mjolnir is sentient and went to a bar, who would be able to pick it up there

At least you know when you pick up Mjolnir, you won't have to go through the walk of shame in the morning

TwoPair
Mar 28, 2010

Pandamn It Feels Good To Be A Gangsta
Grimey Drawer

Discendo Vox posted:

If mjolnir is sentient and went to a bar, who would be able to pick it up there

Get a couple of drinks in it, and that hammer will let any ol' viking wield it.

CityMidnightJunky
May 11, 2013

by Smythe
If I go to a bar and pick up a girl, and she then picks up a guy, and we all leave together, did I pick up the guy?

Discendo Vox
Mar 21, 2013

We don't need to have that dialogue because it's obvious, trivial, and has already been had a thousand times.

CityMidnightJunky posted:

If I go to a bar and pick up a girl, and she then picks up a guy, and we all leave together, did I pick up the guy?

I'd say that's up to you and the girl and the guy to decide together.

Admiralty Flag
Jun 7, 2007

to ride eternal, shiny and chrome

THUNDERDOME LOSER 2022

Discendo Vox posted:

If mjolnir is sentient and went to a bar, who would be able to pick it up there

Depends, how late is it? Mjolnir won't have much luck if everyone's already hammered! :dadjoke:

Samovar
Jun 4, 2011

I'm 😤 not a 🦸🏻‍♂️hero...🧜🏻



Discendo Vox posted:

If mjolnir is sentient and went to a bar, who would be able to pick it up there

You'd know it want to nail anything it could.

Thaddius the Large
Jul 5, 2006

It's in the five-hole!

CityMidnightJunky posted:

If I go to a bar and pick up a girl, and she then picks up a guy, and we all leave together, did I pick up the guy?

I think you’re the elevator in this analogy?

Achernar
Sep 2, 2011
Why doesn't Hulk just pick up Thor who's holding Mjolnir and hit people like that?
Hulk strength + Thor strength + Hammer Strength = KRAKADOOM

Ariong
Jun 25, 2012

Get bashed, platonist!

Achernar posted:

Why doesn't Hulk just pick up Thor who's holding Mjolnir and hit people like that?
Hulk strength + Thor strength + Hammer Strength = KRAKADOOM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GDRTPG7gvj0

YggiDee
Sep 12, 2007

WASP CREW
It's like the ship in Futurama, Mjolnir doesn't move, rather it is the single fixed point in space around which the universe moves. So when someone is 'worthy' of the hammer, it's not that they can lift it, really, it's more that they are synchronised enough to count as Also Mjolnir.

Infinitum
Jul 30, 2004


Beastars has been going super heavy on the Yakuza type storylines recently

Gosha is a Komodo dragon, and Grandfather to the series main protagonist Legosi a Grey Wolf/Komodo mix, dude is also super super conscious about his venom touching another creature and killing them.
He's also a hard worker who likes to spend his weekends caring for children.

(Right to Left)









Pledge of Demon just playing in my head while reading it :allears:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JHQa1SA3EtI

Beastars can be read here

Test Pattern
Dec 20, 2007

Keep scrolling, clod!

Toshimo posted:

Captain Britain and MI13 #11

Really we could put a substantial portion of the comic in this thread.

Air Skwirl
May 13, 2007

Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed shitposting.

Test Pattern posted:

Really we could put a substantial portion of the comic in this thread.

When they disinvited the vampires from England.

DigitalRaven
Oct 9, 2012




Yeah, pretty much all of Captain Britain and MI13 should go in this thread.

Skwirl posted:

When they disinvited the vampires from England.





Captain Britain and MI13 #15

Bonus: Do not gently caress with Pete Wisdom, because he will carpet-bomb you with holy water





Captain Britain and MI13 #13

Bonus bonus: Don't gently caress with the SAS. They have backup from Marvel UK



Captain Britain and MI13 #15

Endless Mike
Aug 13, 2003



It's always weird to me remembering that comics Blade is British.

prefect
Sep 11, 2001

No one, Woodhouse.
No one.




Dead Man’s Band

Endless Mike posted:

It's always weird to me remembering that comics Blade is British.

It's always weird to me remembering that Spitfire is a vampire.

Endless Mike
Aug 13, 2003



That's not weird to me because there has never been a popular Spitfire movie franchise starring a living actress.

Fuego Fish
Dec 5, 2004

By tooth and claw!

Endless Mike posted:

That's not weird to me because there has never been a popular Spitfire movie franchise starring a living actress.

You'd have a living actress play a vampire? Wow, not cool.

Endless Mike
Aug 13, 2003



Fuego Fish posted:

You'd have a living actress play a vampire? Wow, not cool.

Gotta keep ScarJo employed

muscles like this!
Jan 17, 2005


Endless Mike posted:

It's always weird to me remembering that comics Blade is British.

He's also like 100 years old.

Gnome de plume
Sep 5, 2006

Hell.
Fucking.
Yes.

Endless Mike posted:

It's always weird to me remembering that comics Blade is British.

"Some bleeding tossas always about iceskatin' uphill, innit"?

Lurdiak
Feb 26, 2006

I believe in a universe that doesn't care, and people that do.


Endless Mike posted:

It's always weird to me remembering that comics Blade is British.

He definitely wasn't british when he was first introduced, which doesn't help. He talked exactly like Luke Cage and was only in the UK because he was hunting a specific vampire. It's only later that they fleshed out his backstory more.

Doc Hawkins
Jun 15, 2010

Dashing? But I'm not even moving!


good for marvel britain to recognize the citizenship of people born in their caribbean colonies

Nessus
Dec 22, 2003

After a Speaker vote, you may be entitled to a valuable coupon or voucher!



I thought Blade was born in New Orleans -- just, uh, a lot longer ago than he likes to let on.

Mulva
Sep 13, 2011
It's about time for my once per decade ban for being a consistently terrible poster.
He's from Soho. The real one, not that poo poo in Manhattan. He grew up in a whore house and learned to hunt vampires from a jazz trumpeter.

Lobok
Jul 13, 2006

Say Watt?

Gnome de plume posted:

"Some bleeding tossas always about iceskatin' uphill, innit"?

Blade was Wesley Snipes, not Don Cheadle.

DigitalRaven
Oct 9, 2012




I just finished re-reading Ostrander's first Suicide Squad. So much stuff that could go in this thread; I've got half an effortpost about the team's final mission in Diabloverde and the other Suicide Squad, but it'll take a few hours to put together.

So much of the badass comes down to one rule: you do. Not. gently caress. With. The Wall.

TwoPair
Mar 28, 2010

Pandamn It Feels Good To Be A Gangsta
Grimey Drawer
Thor #13: Cul, Asgardian god of fear, has been sent on a solo sneaking mission to Svartalfheim. Dark elves are using magic crystalline mushrooms to power an evil Bifrost and lead a full scale assault on Earth so Cul has to sabotage it somehow.













It ain't Skurge's Last Stand but I thought it was good

site
Apr 6, 2007

Trans pride, Worldwide
Bitch
I like how in wotr omega or something Thor goes to svartalheim and cul is now revered by the dark elves for his sacrifice

Flesh Forge
Jan 31, 2011

LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT MY DOG

TwoPair posted:

It ain't Skurge's Last Stand but I thought it was good

It's not the same but it's extremely bad rear end in its own right.

DigitalRaven
Oct 9, 2012




John Ostrander's Suicide Squad is one of those comics that is pretty much a must-read. For me, it's up there with Simonson's Thor. The basic premise: professional badass Amanda Waller ("the Wall", but almost never to her face) recruits incarcerated supervillains to run black ops for her. They get a full pardon if they succeed, and if they survive.

This goes on for a while with mixed success, and after some political manoeuvring and a stint in prison, the Wall is allowed to take the Squad freelance, for plausible deniability. As long as someone hires them, the Wall retains her privileges around using supervillains.

This is the story of (well, the setup to) the Squad's last mission, and its one of my favourite Amanda Waller moments.

We open on the island of DiabloVerde.






Needless to say, our refugee makes it to the Institute for Metahuman Studies.








If she were just pissed off about the CIA stealing her idea, she’d be off to Washington, but no. The Squad got hired to free a country, and (hopefully) that’s what they’ll do. Showing up the fake squad is a fringe benefit.

Synthbuttrange
May 6, 2007

man they work cheap

DigitalRaven
Oct 9, 2012




Their standard rate is a million dollars a job, but someone pissed off the Wall

Gologle
Apr 15, 2013

The Gologle Posting Experience.

<3
One of my favorite pages ever is actually the last page of that run, the culmination of not only Count Vertigo's arc throughout the run but arguably a lot of the themes of the Suicide Squad.

Avulsion
Feb 12, 2006
I never knew what hit me

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prefect
Sep 11, 2001

No one, Woodhouse.
No one.




Dead Man’s Band

"Hoary Hosts of Hoggoth" :newlol: who writes this wacky stuff?

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