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Chapter 15: Pressure https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YoDh_gHDvkk quote:It was Spring Break in Forks again. When I woke up on Monday morning, I lay in bed for a few seconds absorbing that. Last spring break, I’d been hunted by a vampire, too. I hoped this wasn’t some kind of tradition forming. I have to admit that sometimes Bella is actually funny. quote:Already I was falling into the pattern of things in La Push. I’d spent Sunday mostly on the beach, while Charlie hung out with Billy at the Blacks’ house. I was supposed to be with Jacob, but Jacob had other things to do, so I wandered alone, keeping the secret from Charlie. What kind of relationship is this? You just don't protest when you're said to be "dating" but you also do nothing but hold hands? quote:I worked Tuesday afternoon—Jacob followed me on his bike to make sure I arrived safely—and Mike noticed. I can't stand what Meyer did to Mike. In the whole first book he was a reasonable and nice guy, and suddenly he's completely overcome with jealousy and tearing himself up over the girl who has always seemed to just barely tolerate his presence. quote:That night, Sam and Emily joined Charlie and me for dessert at Billy’s house. Emily brought a cake that would have won over a harder man than Charlie. I could see, as the conversation flowed naturally through a range of casual subjects, that any worries Charlie might have harbored about gangs in La Push were being dissolved. Charlie would be terrible at investigating organized crime. quote:Jake and I skipped out early, to get some privacy. We went out to his garage and sat in the Rabbit. Jacob leaned his head back, his face drawn with exhaustion. I'm with Bella on this one. quote:Jacob chuckled, but shoved the knife back where it belonged. “Fine. It’s a good thing we heal, though. You can’t go see just any doctor when you’re running a temperature that should mean you’re dead.” I'm not sure at this point if gaining shapeshifting powers causes anger issues or if all of the guys in the Wolf Pack who have them naturally have them. Like, has Paul always been liable to throw down over anything? I'm not sure if it makes it better; even if it's supernaturally induced, it's still going to kill someone. quote:“Is it really bad, Jake?” I asked anxiously, wishing I had some way to help him. “Are you miserable?” It's like every time they talk about Sam and Emily the "angry husband beating his wife" comparison gets even stronger. quote:“Is it hard? To find yourself again?” Bella was certain she was about to get into some time travel or immortality poo poo here. Anything is on the table in Forks. quote:“But why does it matter who your great-grandfathers are?” This is something the movies have a lot of trouble showing, possibly because of many of the wolf scenes taking places in forests and other relatively cramped confines. They never seem to be traveling faster than something like a horse, but in the book canon they're going at interstate speeds. quote:“So, tell me something I don’t know,” he said. “Something about vampires. How did you stand it, being around them? Didn’t it creep you out?” For the record, don't do that! Trying to suck out the venom is a really good way to accidentally get it in you. Just keep the wound still and bandaged and get professional medical treatment immediately. quote:But I wasn’t the only one twitching. I could feel Jacob’s whole body trembling next to mine. Even the car shook. This is at least as concerning as Edward's constant fight not to drink her blood. Imagine trying to date a guy like this who wasn't at risk of turning into a werewolf. How many times would you try to calm down his explosive, violent anger before enough was enough? quote:“You okay?” This is not okay and pretty disturbing! quote:“Jasper could… sort of control the emotions of the people around him. Not in a bad way, just to calm someone down, that kind of thing. It would probably help Paul a lot,” I added, teasing weakly. “And then Alice could see things that were going to happen. The future, you know, but not absolutely. The things she saw would change when someone changed the path they were on.…” If you were hoping that at any point Bella would learn how to move on, she doesn't. The only cure that will work on her is getting what she wants back. quote:He smoothed my hair. “It’s okay, Bella, it’s okay. I won’t bring it up again. I’m sorry.” If they were to actually begin a relationship, I feel like it's at least as unhealthy as her relationship with Edward. She still has panic attacks whenever she thinks about her ex and needs near-death experiences to feel alive, while he has major anger problems and could literally tear her to pieces if taken too far. It's like putting a pressure cooker inside another pressure cooker and turning them both on. quote:And when we were together, it was fine. But Jacob had a horrible, dangerous job he felt compelled to do, and so I was often alone, stuck in La Push for safety, with nothing to do to keep my mind off any of my worries. See what I mean? quote:So that left me wandering the beach, pacing the length of the rocky crescent back and forth, again and again. How many hundreds of pages do you need to do this before you're allowed to stop? quote:Jacob found me like that, and I could tell from his expression that he understood. Jake, are you forgetting that she doesn't run so hot that she boils water? Even in April the average temperature in Forks barely reaches 60. Just stripping down is going to be freezing, and such cold water could cause her to freeze from the shock and drown. quote:But it had been days since I’d heard Edward’s voice. That was probably part of the problem. I was addicted to the sound of my delusions. It made things worse if I went too long without them. Jumping off a cliff was certain to remedy that situation. This will definitely end well. quote:I woke early the next morning and snuck a change of clothes out to the truck. I had a feeling that Charlie would approve of today’s plan just about as much as he would approve of the motorcycle. Yeah, if Jacob found out the true depths of her mental illness he'd probably wolf out right there. quote:I expected Jacob to meet me out front, the way he usually did when my noisy truck announced my arrival. When he didn’t, I guessed that he might still be sleeping. I would wait—let him get as much rest as he could. He needed his sleep, and that would give the day time to warm a bit more. Jake had been right about the weather, though; it had changed in the night. A thick layer of clouds pressed heavily on the atmosphere now, making it almost sultry; it was warm and close under the gray blanket. I left my sweater in the truck. Bella has yet to learn the art of using humor to suppress your negative emotions. She really should learn it. quote:“You’re right,” he agreed, still complacent. His ancient eyes were impossible to read. “This one’s tricky.” "Ancient"? He's only in his fifties! quote:I bit my lip. Did you, now. quote:“It’s not as dangerous for them as you think it is. Sam knows what he’s doing. You’re the one that you should worry about. The vampire doesn’t want to fight them. She’s just trying to find a way around them… to you.” James was killed just fine by the Cullens and they already killed Laurent. Why is she suddenly so unwilling to believe that a centuries-long tradition of shapeshifters built specifically for killing vampires is incapable of taking out another one? We never saw Victoria display any special talents or strength. quote:Billy went back to his breakfast; I sat down on the sofa and flipped aimlessly through the TV channels. That didn’t last long. I started to feel closed in by the small room, claustrophobic, upset by the fact that I couldn’t see out the curtained windows. All right, we've established that very dangerous weather is approaching soon. Doing anything outside in a few minutes is probably a bad idea. quote:As soon as I reached the beach, I wished I hadn’t come—I’d already had enough of this place. I’d been here almost every day, wandering alone. Was it so much different from my nightmares? But where else to go? I trudged down to the driftwood tree, and sat at the end so that I could lean against the tangled roots. I stared up at the angry sky broodingly, waiting for the first drops to break the stillness. I'm sure that won't mean anything. quote:The waves picked up as I paced, beginning to crash against the rocks, but there was still no wind. I felt pinned down by the pressure of the storm. Everything swirled around me, but it was perfectly still where I stood. The air had a faint electric charge—I could feel the static in my hair. Ah, there we go. quote:Jacob had promised me cliff diving, hadn’t he? Just because he was unavailable, should I have to give up the distraction I needed so badly—needed even worse because Jacob was out risking his life? Risking it, in essence, for me. If it weren’t for me, Victoria would not be killing people here… just somewhere else, far away. If anything happened to Jacob, it would be my fault. That realization stabbed deep and had me jogging back up to the road toward Billy’s house, where my truck waited. This kind of dangerous, twisted logic being used to justify self-harming behavior is something that could legitimately get the police called to detain you for your own safety in some states. quote:I knew my way to the lane that passed closest to the cliffs, but I had to hunt for the little path that would take me out to the ledge. As I followed it, I looked for turns or forks, knowing that Jake had planned to take me off the lower outcropping rather than the top, but the path wound in a thin single line toward the brink with no options. I didn’t have time to find another way down—the storm was moving in quickly now. The wind was finally beginning to touch me, the clouds pressing closer to the ground. Just as I reached the place where the dirt path fanned out into the stone precipice, the first drops broke through and splattered on my face. If she had been saying this about taking a razor blade to her arms, the book would have been condemned for its encouragement of harmful and suicidal behavior in a young audience. Somehow this one remained a popular bestseller.... quote:The ocean sounded very far away, somehow farther than before, when I was on the path in the trees. I grimaced when I thought of the probable temperature of the water. But I wasn’t going to let that stop me. I can't believe that somehow the "Edward is abusive and sparkly vampires are gay" thing because the common pop culture complaint about the series but the protagonist being completely crazypants went unremarked for the most part. quote:“Please.” It was just a whisper in the blowing rain that tossed my hair and drenched my clothes—making me as wet as if this were my second jump of the day. Charlie would have a goddamn heart attack. quote:I was proud of myself as I plunged deeper into the freezing black water. I hadn’t had one moment of terror—just pure adrenaline. Really, the fall wasn’t scary at all. Where was the challenge? You idiot. quote:I’d been so preoccupied by the size of the cliffs, by the obvious danger of their high, sheer faces, that I hadn’t worried at all about the dark water waiting. I never dreamed that the true menace was lurking far below me, under the heaving surf. This is what leads people to drown in rivers so often. Even if not very deep, when you're thrown into rushing water you simply can't see anything around you and it becomes extremely difficult to right yourself to even try swimming in a single direction. Cliff diving into freezing water in the middle of a storm is the kind of move that's so boneheaded stupid that it makes you wonder if she can be allowed outside without supervision. quote:I fought to keep my breath in, to keep my lips locked around my last store of oxygen. I'm almost feeling sorry for an auditory hallucination having to deal with this bullshit. quote:The cold of the water was numbing my arms and legs. I didn’t feel the buffeting so much as before. It was more of just a dizziness now, a helpless spinning in the water. Okay now this is starting to actually seem suicidal and not just on the verge of it. quote:I thought briefly of the cliches, about how you were suppose to see your life flash before your eyes. I was so much luckier. Who wanted to see a rerun, anyway?
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Sep 12, 2019 15:36
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quote:He’s… the head of the pack, you know. He’s the Alpha. When he tells us to do something, or not to do something—when he really means it, well, we can’t just ignore him.” So, fun fact about actual wolf packs. The idea a lot of people have about their structure.. that there's an Alpha wolf who brutally keeps the others in line and is constantly at risk of overthrow, is outdated and wrong. Somebody came up with it after examining captive wolves in zoos. Actual wolf packs tend to consist of a mated pair and their unmated children along with sometimes other collateral relations. The rest of the pack isn't submissive to the alphas because of some brutal imposition of dominance. They're submissive because the alphas are their parents, and young wolves are submissive to their parents.
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Sep 13, 2019 13:49
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Chapter 16: Parisquote:At that moment, my head broke the surface. I know she's trying to use the imagery of rocks and iron bars to try and depict Bella's disorientation, but by including Jacob's voice and name it accidentally gives the image that Jacob is trying to save her by smacking her in the back with a rock. quote:The rock wasn’t cold like the water; it was hot on my skin. I realized it was Jacob’s hand, trying to beat the water from my lungs. The iron bar that had dragged me from the sea was also… warm… My head whirled, the black spots covered everything.… https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EDDtjfmS0Hs Robert Pattinson is clearly hating his life when he does his line read for this. quote:“How long has she been unconscious?” someone else asked. Someone should tell Meyer that contractions are okay. She won't look weird for using them. quote:I realized that I was still. There was no tug of the current on me—the heaving was inside my head. The surface under me was flat and motionless. It felt grainy against my bare arms. This is why you wait for the real paramedics to come in a situation like this. quote:I tried to open my eyes. It took me a minute, but then I could see the dark, purple clouds, flinging the freezing rain down at me. “Jake?” I croaked. While Robert Pattinson is doing the "No. Don't. Stop." Willy Wonka acting style in the film, the clip is still enough of a comparison to highlight how godawful Meyer is at writing anything suspenseful. This scene could be any other in the book. The tone is nearly a flat line for most of it. quote:The water licked and writhed up the sand after us as Jacob carried me away, like it was angry that I’d escaped. As I stared wearily, a spark of color caught my unfocused eyes—a small flash of fire was dancing on the black water, far out in the bay. The image made no sense, and I wondered how conscious I really was. My head swirled with the memory of the black, churning water—of being so lost that I couldn’t find up or down. So lost… but somehow Jacob… Like I said in the last chapter, diving off a 100-foot cliff with no experience into freezing water as a hurricane approaches is the kind of stupid that makes you seriously wonder about a person's mental competency in general. If Charlie witnessed this, he would be justified in locking her in the house and driving her to and from school in his police car until she moves out. quote:“Yeah, it was really stupid,” he agreed, drops of rain shaking free of his hair as he nodded. “Look, do you mind saving the stupid stuff for when I’m around? I won’t be able to concentrate if I think you’re jumping off cliffs behind my back.” Wait, are we already done with the cliff dive? It's been two pages since she was rescued from a near-suicidal moment of stupidity and we've already abandoned it like it never happened! quote:“Sam came back with you… is everyone else home, too?” I hoped they weren’t still out searching for her. This is one of those situations where the character is right but the author is still making an error with the pacing. Yes, Harry being on death's door from a heart attack is technically more serious than Bella being resuscitated from drowning and he's a big enough part of the tribe's life that it makes sense that they would shift to caring about him once they confirm that Bella is okay. But the cliff dive is meant to be a huge, impactful moment showing Bella at her nadir, her reckless pursuit of adrenaline-induced hallucinations bringing her to the brink of death. It's not something that should be waved off and forgotten about within a few pages. quote:“What can I do?” I asked. We've also got a big problem with this plot development: Harry has been a virtual nonentity in the story. Apart from a few passing references in the two books, he's only appeared once and I don't recall him having any dialogue. The most dramatic moment since Laurent's encounter with Bella has shoved aside to try and make us worried about a character that's received almost no development. We can only nominally care about someone that we may have forgotten even existed by this point. quote:Billy’s sofa was right next to the radiator, and I was warm now, despite my soaked clothes. My lungs ached in a way that pushed me toward unconsciousness rather than keeping me awake. I wondered vaguely if it was wrong to sleep… or was I getting drowning mixed up with concussions…? Jacob began softly snoring, and the sound of it soothed like a lullaby. I fell asleep quickly. It's quite convenient that all of Bella's dreams are poignant and directly related to the plot. quote:Jacob was still asleep; he’d slumped down to the floor and his breathing was deep and even. The house was darker now than before, it was black outside the window. I was stiff, but warm and almost dry. The inside of my throat burned with every breath I took. I was going to have to get up—at least to get a drink. She would certainly be safer doing that for the rest of the series! quote:Instead of moving, I thought about Juliet some more. This is something I can actually talk a lot about! This year I did a local fringe festival show based around performing an abbreviated form of Romeo & Juliet while drunk. In order to create the script, I took the entire unabridged script (including scenes that are normally cut from performances and movies) and chopped it down to a lean hour. I also studied the cultural context of the show to gain a better understanding of it from the Elizabethan perspective, which often doesn't match the modern one and makes much of the play come across entirely different to contemporary audiences. Shakespeare never intended for Romeo and Juliet to be a portrayal of a healthy relationship. Were they truly in love? Yes. Were they dumbass kids with bad parents who made things worse? Also yes. quote:I wondered if she would have married Paris in the end, just to please her parents, to keep the peace. No, probably not, I decided. But then, the story didn’t say much about Paris. He was just a stick figure—a placeholder, a threat, a deadline to force her hand. Paris is a character that's usually forgotten about, as his role is one that's easy to cut without changing the show; my own abridged take had Paris only appear in the final scene and be immediately killed as he's celebrating finally getting a moment to himself. But the original version of the play had multiple long scenes with Paris that showed him talking to Lord Capulet about the marriage. While it was indeed a marriage of convenience, he was portrayed as a decent (if unspectacular) man who didn't hold ill will toward anyone. His murder by Romeo in the climax is a way of showing how far Romeo has come in his suicidal insanity, while Juliet isn't exactly portrayed as being in the right when she says she'd rather be tortured and murdered than marry Paris instead of the married a day after meeting. quote:Jacob’s slow, deep breathing was the only sound in the room—like a lullaby hummed to a child, like the whisper of a rocking chair, like the ticking of an old clock when you had nowhere you needed to go.… It was the sound of comfort. Romeo and Juliet are meant to be seen as immature. It's not really a romance to take a positive impression from. quote:I sighed, and then groaned when the sigh scraped my throat. I was reading too much into the story. Romeo wouldn’t change his mind. That’s why people still remembered his name, always twined with hers: Romeo and Juliet. That’s why it was a good story. “Juliet gets dumped and ends up with Paris” would have never been a hit. That's all it took to get Bella to finally start recognizing her toxic and dangerous behavior: a character who didn't even have dialogue suffering a heart attack. quote:Images from my ill-considered afternoon stunt rolled through my head while I tried to come up with something pleasant to think about… the feel of the air as I fell, the blackness of the water, the thrashing of the current… Edward’s face… I lingered there for a long time. Jacob’s warm hands, trying to beat life back into me… the stinging rain flung down by the purple clouds… the strange fire on the waves… That was just one of Captain Jake's skippers firing his grenade launcher! quote:My thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a car squelching through the mud on the road outside. I heard it stop in front of the house, and doors started opening and closing. I thought about sitting up, and then decided against that idea. Harry's death is far more meaningful to the audience in the movie. The film adaptation actually shows Harry and Charlie encountering Victoria in the woods, with Harry being attacked by her after trying to protect Charlie. Jacob saves them and drives her off, but Harry suffers a fatal heart attack from the stress. It's a far more poignant moment and Harry is given actual dialogue and characterization through the movie. quote:I swallowed hard. Charlie gets home and wonders why Bella smells so strongly of salt water. quote:I lay listlessly on the sofa while I waited for him. Billy was silent in the other room. I felt like a peeping tom, peering through the cracks at a private sorrow that wasn’t mine. It's really great that all the exciting action in these books keeps happening somewhere else where Bella can't witness it, but we get entire chapters dedicated to awkward dates where two people get a stomach virus that doesn't matter in the plot at all. quote:It was a quiet ride after that. The cold air had woken me up. My mind was alert, and it was working very hard and very fast. Jesus. quote:I’d have to tell him everything, I knew that. It was the only way to be fair. I’d have to explain it right, so that he’d know I wasn’t settling, that he was much too good for me. He already knew I was broken, that part wouldn’t surprise him, but he’d need to know the extent of it. I’d even have to admit that I was crazy—explain about the voices I heard. He’d need to know everything before he made a decision. Maybe you should consider therapy and medication before you start finding a new guy to attach yourself to. quote:Jacob stopped the truck in front of my dark house, cutting the engine so it was suddenly silent. Like so many other times, he seemed to be in tune with my thoughts now. This kinda wrecks the general impression of a "love triangle" in this series. Bella never loves Jacob the same way she loves Edward, because her love for Edward is an unhealthy obsession that she's built her personality and existence around. While Eclipse gives her some stronger feelings about it, Edward always remains the main love interest. Jacob is present to add drama, and in the next book they both behave in ways that just further the problem with the main characters all being assholes. quote:And then, as clearly as if I were in immediate danger, Edward’s velvet voice whispered in my ear. “Be happy,” he told me. Two naughty words in the same chapter! quote:Jacob’s eyes were wild, raking the dark street. He barely seemed aware of the tremors that were rolling through his body. “Phase or get her out of here?” he hissed at himself.  The S-class Mercedes-Benz is one of the best selling luxury sedans in the world. It's also one of the very few vehicles to actually have the same model in the movie, albeit updated to the latest model year. quote:It was Carlisle’s car. Aw poo poo, the class is back! quote:“Stop!” I cried again, louder this time, because Jacob was gunning the truck down the street. Not gonna lie, I wouldn't hesitate to hang out with Carlisle either. He's a lot nicer than Jacob too! quote:I glanced at him, ripping my unwilling eyes off the Mercedes—terrified that it would disappear the second I looked away. "Nobody else would ever drive the best selling luxury sedan in America!" quote:A shudder rippled through his wide shoulders, but his eyes were flat and emotionless. “No.” drat. Racist. quote:Remorse pinned me against the seat for one long second. What had I just done to Jacob? Never has! quote:I slid across the seat and put the truck back in drive. My hands were shaking almost as hard as Jake’s had been, and this took a minute of concentration. Then I carefully turned the truck around and drove it back to my house. Oh hey, Victoria did make an appearance in this book! Swimming fast as gently caress in the distance! quote:My hand froze in its searching, my whole body froze into place, as I realized why I recognized the strange orange color on the water.
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Sep 13, 2019 15:48
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While reading about writing issues on Mythcreants, I came across a really good descriptor for a character: the Fancy Snow Globe. It's a gender neutral version of the "sexy lamp" test, in which you ask if a female character could be replaced with a sexy lamp and not change anything about her presence in the story. The Fancy Snow Globe is a character that could be replaced by a fancy snow globe and still provide the same amount of meaning to the plot. Their existence is tied to what other people do to them or because of them, "shaking the snow globe." A common example is a one-dimensional love interest who only exists to provide motivation to the protagonist through romance, kidnapping, a tragic death, etc. What's unusual about Twilight is that the protagonist fits this description. If Bella was replaced by a fancy snow globe that everyone was obsessed with shaking or breaking, the plot would be effectively identical. Any actual complexity to her character is pointless because she rarely takes agency to affect the plot, mostly just sitting in the background while other people do everything. You would expect Victoria hunting Bella in revenge to be a huge plot point, but even that happens entirely offscreen except for one fleeting glimpse of her swimming away. The next book has a single fight that Bella simply watches because she's powerless to interact, followed by a large battle that she never even witnesses and has to be described to her. The ending to New Moon might actually be the only time in which Bella does something of her own prerogative that actually affects the plot in a meaningful way.
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Sep 13, 2019 19:16
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Chapter 17: Visitorquote:Unnaturally still and white, with her large black eyes intent on my face, my visitor waited perfectly motionless in the center of the hall, beautiful beyond imagining.  quote:I didn’t notice when the gasping turned into something else—I only realized I was sobbing when Alice dragged me to the living room couch and pulled me into her lap. It was like curling up into a cool stone, but a stone that was contoured comfortingly to the shape of my body. She rubbed my back in a gentle rhythm, waiting for me to get control of myself. If you were hoping that Bella would ever learn a lesson, prepare to be disappointed as usual. She never gets therapy and remains completely tied to Edward and the Cullens for her own self-worth and happiness. She remains depressed and half-suicidal until she gets back what she lost. quote:Alice sighed. “I’d forgotten how exuberant you are,” she said, and her tone was disapproving. Bella:  quote:Alice shook her head. “I told him this would happen, but he didn’t believe me. ‘Bella promised,’” her voice imitated his so perfectly that I froze in shock while the pain ripped through my torso. “‘Don’t be looking for her future, either,’” she continued to quote him. “‘We’ve done enough damage.’ Even Alice can't believe this poo poo. quote:“I’d seen some of Jacob’s friends cliff diving,” I insisted. “It looked like… fun, and I was bored.…” Bella was literally so dumb that you can't convince someone clairvoyant that it wasn't a suicide attempt. quote:She cocked her head to the side, distracted. I continued. “It’s true that I probably would have drowned if Jacob hadn’t jumped in after me. Well, okay, there’s no probably about it. But he did, and he pulled me out, and I guess he towed me back to shore, though I was kind of out for that part. It couldn’t have been more than a minute that I was under before he grabbed me. How come you didn’t see that?” This is actually important, and I'm pretty sure it's something Meyer quickly wrote in when she realized that Alice's powers could accidentally create a plot hole. quote:I watched curiously as an enigmatic range of emotions flitted across her face. Something was bothering her—her imperfect vision? But I wasn’t sure. Then she deliberately leaned in and sniffed my shoulder. Vampire and werewolves are just different forms of dogs. quote:“Jacob Black. He’s… sort of my best friend, I guess. At least, he was…” I thought of Jacob’s angry, betrayed face, and wondered what he was to me now. This whole chapter is just Bella getting dragged. quote:“I survived,” I pointed out. Bella you idiot. quote:Alice gawked at me for a moment, and then recovered herself, blinking rapidly. “Well, I guess that explains the smell,” she muttered. “But does it explain what I didn’t see?” She frowned, her porcelain forehead creasing. This is like explaining to your friends that you've only been dating your ex again for a little bit. quote:She glowered at me. “A young werewolf? Even worse! Edward was right—you’re a magnet for danger. Weren’t you supposed to be staying out of trouble?” Bella had one brain cell and the Cullens took it with her when they left. quote:I didn’t want to argue with Alice—I was still trembling with joy that she was really, truly here, that I could touch her marble skin and hear her wind-chime voice—but she had it all wrong. I really wasn't expecting Bella and Alice's relationship to be so overtly homoerotic. quote:“No, Alice, the vampires didn’t really leave—not all of them, anyway. That’s the whole trouble. If it weren’t for the werewolves, Victoria would have gotten me by now. Well, if it weren’t for Jake and his friends, Laurent would have gotten me before she could, I guess, so—” As someone who already thinks Bella is incredibly dangerous to herself, I can't imagine her reacting to her hallucinations and self-harming behavior with anything other than turning around and walking right out the door. quote:She listened to my story without interrupting. Occasionally, she would shake her head, and the crease in her forehead deepened until it looked like it was carved permanently into the marble of her skin. She didn’t speak and, finally, I fell quiet, struck again by the borrowed grief at Harry’s passing. I thought of Charlie; he would be home soon. What condition would he be in? Bella's laughter being described as "hysterical" so often makes me think of her as a babbling lunatic. quote:Alice scowled at the floor for a moment. “Well… I guess I acted impulsively today. I probably shouldn’t have intruded.” I think Alice leaving now would actually induce her to commit suicide. quote:Her eyes opened wider. “All right,” she said, enunciating each word with slow precision. “I’m not going anywhere tonight. Take a deep breath.” It's really frustrating how many legitimately funny or good lines are in these books, surrounded by a morass of boredom and disgust. quote:“It goes deeper than that. You’re a mess.” No you're not! You just jumped off a cliff during a hurricane to make yourself hallucinate today! quote:She frowned. “I told him,” she said to herself. "You know I'm way more likely to have died while you were gone than anything else!" quote:“I do. But I hoped.” Why do people like Bella, again? quote:The phone rang. I am! She's way more interesting than Paul! quote:“Not especially. But it’s none of their business anyway.” "Also I'm not sure if our ages make this a MILF or DILF thing." quote:I nodded, disappointed but resigned. She hesitated, studying me. Bella was about to end the whole series right there. quote:“Oops.” I took a step back. Okay now even I'm shipping it. quote:I took a deep breath. Alice would be back. I suddenly felt so much better. Is...is it not obvious? quote:When I was cleaned up, I went back to the kitchen. I couldn’t see any signs that Charlie had eaten recently, and he would probably be hungry when he got back. I hummed tunelessly to myself as I moved around the kitchen. She already went through every house pet in the neighborhood. quote:I sat down next to her and leaned my head on her shoulder. She put her cold arms around me and sighed.  quote:I focused my curiosity on a safer topic. “You said you flew here.… Where did you come from?” I feel like Charlie goes through so much worse than Bella. quote:He kept his arms tight around me as he started toward the door again. Can the Cullens adopt Charlie instead? quote:Alice went back to the couch, and I followed her. This time, she was the one to pull me against her shoulder. “You look tired.” We keep getting less and less reason to think Edward is such a great guy! quote:I laughed once, and then sighed. Remember how the book initially didn't reveal anything about how Bella's depression went and just let you assume she stayed robotic for those 4 months? quote:“She snapped out of it though?” The Florida Mental Health Act, or Baker Act, would actually allow Bella to have been involuntarily committed! Someone displaying signs of mental illness, behaving as though they're a danger to themselves or others (including neglecting their own health and care to a dangerous degree), and refusing voluntary examination can be forcibly institutionalized for their own safety. quote:Charlie trailed off. It was hard listening to this, knowing how much pain I’d caused him. Charlie had to go through all of this...because of a 6-month relationship breaking up. And it still hasn't stopped. quote:I could almost see him shuddering. I shuddered, too, remembering. And then I sighed. I hadn’t fooled him at all, not for one second. I mean it's not really Edward's fault either. While the Cullens chose a really lovely way to do the breakup and had awful communication after Jasper's accident, Bella's attachment issues are her own. Even the most casual breakup would have caused this. quote:“She seems better now, though.” That actually brings to light some more of the issues with Bella's insistence that she's mentally more mature than Jacob. Apart from her obvious emotional instability, she seems to have forgotten that Jacob has had to care for his paraplegic father for years. As someone who has had to care for a family member who lacked the physical capability to care for themselves, I can attest that Jacob has probably gone through some awful and mildly traumatizing things and literally seen things that he shouldn't have had to see. While Bella having to be self-sufficient due to her childlike mother was a longer period of time, what Jacob went through was likely much worse as an individual moment. quote:Charlie sighed out a big gust of air, folding quickly to the lack of opposition. “Okay, so I guess that’s overstating things. I don’t know… even with Jacob, now and then I see something in her eyes, and I wonder if I’ve ever grasped how much pain she’s really in. It’s not normal, Alice, and it… it frightens me. Not normal at all. Not like someone… left her, but like someone died.” His voice cracked. Yes, chosen. Not "was promised", but "chosen." Even the rest of the family held some reluctance despite their baffling love for her (insomuch as anyone here having love for Bella is baffling with how awful of a person she is) and Edward had sworn up and down that he would never turn her into a vampire. At this stage of the series, her entire future was one that she created in her imagination. She devastated herself by losing something that wasn't real. quote:Charlie went on in a hopeless tone. “I don’t know if she’s going to get over it—I’m not sure if it’s in her nature to heal from something like this. She’s always been such a constant little thing. She doesn’t get past things, change her mind.” I don't think Alice was being complimentary. quote:“And Alice…” Charlie hesitated. “Now, you know how fond I am of you, and I can tell that she’s happy to see you, but… I’m a little worried about what your visit will do to her.” But wouldn't she have had an idea? She just said earlier in the chapter that she's become "attuned" to Bella so she doesn't even have to intentionally try to see her future. Did it not kick in until Bella did something so drastically dumb that her brain couldn't miss it? quote:“Don’t apologize, honey. Who knows? Maybe it will be good for her.” Don't ask questions you're not prepared to hear the answer to. quote:“Alice, I have to ask you something,” Charlie said awkwardly. "He can only enjoy the beach when it's cloudy!" quote:A chair scooted from the table, scraping loudly across the floor. I pictured Charlie getting up; there was no way Alice would make that kind of noise. The faucet ran, splashing against a dish. It didn’t sound like they were going to say anything more about Edward, so I decided it was time to wake up. And, you know, can see the future and has superhuman senses. quote:Charlie had to leave then—he was helping Sue Clearwater with the funeral arrangements. It would have been a very long day without Alice. She never spoke about leaving, and I didn’t ask her. I knew it was inevitable, but I put it out of my mind. It sounds like everyone except Edward spends their time as a vampire just having the time of their lives! quote:“My name was Mary Alice Brandon,” she told me quietly. “I had a little sister named Cynthia. Her daughter—my niece—is still alive in Biloxi.” Do you really count as "alive" if you're living in Biloxi? quote:“Did you find out why they put you in… that place?” What would drive parents to that extreme? Even if their daughter saw visions of the future.… Alice just awkwardly stuffing a new folder of papers into her bag every time someone looks away. quote:I didn’t know what to say, and, after a short pause, Alice moved on to lighter topics. Is it really that bad forgetting about Edward? Let him be all "woe is me" in the jungle while having fun with all the genius vampires that keep loving around and going on international trips. quote:Charlie was almost a stranger when he came down the stairs before the sun was up, wearing an old suit I’d never seen him in before. The jacket hung open; I guessed it was too tight to fasten the buttons. His tie was a bit wide for the current style. He tiptoed to the door, trying not to wake us up. I let him go, pretending to sleep, as Alice did on the recliner. Remember that Meyer envisioned John C. Reily playing Charlie. Casting a handsome and fit Billy Burke is probably the biggest change from the book description of anyone. quote:As soon as he was out the door, Alice sat up. Under the quilt, she was fully dressed. Bella you haven't even cleaned the drat house? quote:While I worked, Alice leaned against the doorjamb and asked nonchalant questions about my, well, our high school friends and what they had been up to since she’d left. Her face stayed casual and emotionless, but I sensed her disapproval when she realized how little I could tell her. Or maybe I just had a guilty conscience after eavesdropping on her conversation with Charlie yesterday morning. Like I said, I think Meyer put this in to try and cover up for why Alice couldn't see Bella get rescued. I'm not sure if it turns out important later. quote:The doorbell rang again—buzzing twice quickly and impatiently.
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Sep 16, 2019 18:17
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Chapter 18: The Funeralquote:I sprinted down the stairs and threw the door open. Are we not supposed to be disturbed by Jacob's sudden volatility? If I had a friend who couldn't even come to my house without being on the verge of raging out and killing everything in sight, I'd probably stop being his friend! quote:“Hey,” I finally said when he didn’t speak. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hF_-5pZ_kxY quote:Jake’s eyes flashed back to me, his thick, black brows pushing into a furious angle over his deep-set eyes. His jaw set, and he marched—there was no other way to describe the way he moved—up the sidewalk and shrugged past me into the house. I think it's the other way around. quote:Jacob was in the hall behind me, staring at the mess of blankets in the living room. That's a fast funeral! He just died yesterday! Traditional Quileute burial practices involve taking the body out of the house as fast as possible so no curious souls will follow it and place it in a canoe (or hollow log or cheap pine casket if they didn't have their own canoe) with broken ("dead") items to take with them into the afterlife. This neat practice unfortunately ended some time in the 1940s. quote:“Okay. Get it over with then.” I was probably overdoing it with the antagonism, but I didn’t want him to see how much this hurt. I knew I wasn’t being fair. After all, I’d picked the bloodsucker over him last night. I’d hurt him first. Always remember that when you hurt someone, the appropriate response is to hurt them further and be even more antagonistic to cover up your emotions! quote:He took a deep breath, and his trembling fingers were suddenly still. His face smoothed into a serene mask. This is a weird part of the treaty that seems to just be an excuse to keep the conflict going. Now the wolves can only help Bella if she's on Quileute territory. quote:He looked away then, out the back windows. He didn’t continue. I'd take that over him barely suppressing his violent anger! quote:Now I didn’t speak. He looked back at my face with probing eyes. Hang out with your normal human friends? quote:I slumped against the counter and buried my face in my hands. How had I made such a mess of everything? But what could I have done differently? Even in hindsight, I couldn’t think of any better way, any perfect course of action. Jacob's making a habit of running away before running right back and apologizing. quote:“’S’okay,” I mumbled. “I started it this time.” "It's like...the author is telling me the conflict needs to continue!" quote:So I just said, “Sorry,” again. Yep! quote:“Yeah.” Then he sniffed my hair and said, “Ew.” Is she describing her relationships or the plot of this series? quote:“I’ll miss you,” Jacob whispered, echoing my thoughts. “Every minute. I hope she leaves soon.” "Telling me that you're going to murder my friends is actually really hosed up!" quote:Jacob freed one arm so that he could cup his big brown hand under my chin and make me look at him. “Yeah. It was easier when we were both human, wasn’t it?” The merchandise factories begin working overtime. quote:No! I hadn’t made this decision yet. I didn’t know if I could do this, and now I was out of time to think. But I would have been a fool if I thought rejecting him now would have no consequences. 18 years old, emotional maturity of 10. quote:Keeping his eyes on mine, Jacob began to bend his face toward me. And I was still absolutely undecided. Remember how this entire plot happened because of poor communication? Jacob is the worst offender. quote:“Who did you just hang up on?” I gasped, infuriated. “In my house, and on my phone?” This is about to get real dumb and contrived in a second. quote:“You listen to me, Jacob Black—” Her dramatic entrance utterly ruined by Bella and Jacob crashing into each other and getting tangled up on the floor. quote:I scrambled to my feet and lurched to her side. Her eyes were dazed and far away, her face drawn and whiter than bone. Her slim body trembled to an inner turmoil. Remember when you almost hulked out inside your car just because of a mildly stressful conversation? quote:“Alice?” My voice was weak. “What happened?” I asked, even though I didn’t want to hear. We're about to witness the dramatic climax and the entire rest of the series' plot occur because of a stupid game of Telephone. quote:Whatever the answer was, it made her jaw tighten in anger. Her eyes flashed and narrowed. She's reacting to how contrived this ending is. quote:“Tell me Alice,” I whispered. This doesn't really help in making Rosalie any more likable. I'm pretty sure she just acted entirely out of malice. quote:“And when Edward called here, he thought Jacob meant my funeral,” I realized. It stung to know how close I’d been, just inches away from his voice. My nails dug into Jacob’s arm, but he didn’t flinch. I promise it somehow gets more contrived shortly. quote:“NO!” The half-shrieked denial was so loud after the whispered words, it made us all jump. I felt the blood rushing to my face as I realized what she’d seen. “No! No, no, no! He can’t! He can’t do that!” So, the chain of events that are leading to the rest of the plot unfolding the way it does: 1. Alice sees Bella jump off the cliff but misses her getting saved because she now can't see werewolves with her future vision for some reason. She makes sure to tell everyone except Edward but doesn't tell them that she's going to see if Bella's okay because Edward will throw a temper tantrum if anyone contacts her again. Even though just some basic spying from a distance would confirm it, what with their super senses and all. 2. Rosalie tells Edward anyway, even though she should probably know how crazy he is about his relationship and would take Bella's death extremely poorly. 3. Alice finds Bella still alive, but doesn't tell anyone because of Edward being a giant baby. 4. Charlie goes to the funeral. Edward calls and imitates Carlisle, and Jacob just says "Charlie's not here. He's at the funeral" without any explanation of whose funeral. 5. Edward immediately throws his phone in the trash can for no explained reason so nobody can call him back and say it was a mistake. 6. Instead of setting himself on fire or something else that would instantly kill him, Edward decides to kill himself in the most dramatic fashion possible, thus allowing Bella to get involved with the Volturi. The entire series could have been completely turned around at any one of these steps. Everything that happens in the next two books happens only because everyone made improbable, stupid, or outright malicious decisions every step of the way. quote:“You said before we had to hurry. Hurry how? Let’s do it, whatever it is!” Edward may not be Carlisle's actual son, but I think he inherited his refusal to take the obvious method of suicide. quote:I stared at her with my jaw clenched in frustration. I’d heard nothing yet that would explain why we were still standing here. Alice even outright loving says that the only reason this series continues the way it does is because Edward is too extra to not find the most dramatic way to off himself. quote:“Let’s go!” "I regularly do stupid poo poo that nearly kills me" probably isn't the best argument for your plan. quote:“You write a note to Charlie. I’ll call the airlines.” You could have done that a lot earlier. quote:I glanced up at him, and he scowled at my panicked expression. In her defense, this is the most proactive thing she's ever done in this story. quote:“Don’t go,” Jacob whispered. The anger was all gone now that Alice was out of sight. Even when trying to prepare for the climax, we can't get away from Renee being a child. quote:I tore through my room. I stuffed my old wallet, a clean T-shirt, and sweatpants into my backpack, and then threw my toothbrush on top. I hurled myself back down the stairs. The sense of déjà vu was nearly stifling by this point. At least, unlike the last time—when I’d run away from Forks to escape thirsty vampires rather than to find them—I wouldn’t have to say goodbye to Charlie in person. Does Alice write loving gothic horror novels in her spare time? quote:“And you take her to them like a bottle of wine for a party!” he shouted. "This book is long enough already!" quote:Alice turned for the car, disappearing in her haste. I hurried after her, pausing automatically to turn and lock the door. "Stay with me and let your ex die" isn't the best argument in this situation. quote:The engine of Carlisle’s Mercedes purred; the rhythm of the thrumming spiked when Alice revved it impatiently. I shook my head, tears spattering from my eyes with the sharp motion. I pulled my arm free, and he didn’t fight me. poo poo, now he has no shoes.
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Sep 18, 2019 15:17
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I'll be leaving on a long business trip next Monday, so this will be the last update for a few weeks. Chapter 19: Race quote:We made our flight with seconds to spare, and then the true torture began. The plane sat idle on the tarmac while the flight attendants strolled—so casually—up and down the aisle, patting the bags in the overhead compartments to make sure everything fit. The pilots leaned out of the cockpit, chatting with them as they passed. Alice’s hand was hard on my shoulder, holding me in my seat while I bounced anxiously up and down. Also the ocean exists. quote:I just nodded in time with my bouncing. Never forget that Edward is one bad day away from contemplating mass murder. quote:“No, you can’t.” Alice’s voice dropped till it was nearly inaudible, though I was sitting inches from her. Contrarily, I listened harder. “Tell Emmett no.… Well, go after Emmett and Rosalie and bring them back.… Think about it, Jasper. If he sees any of us, what do you think he will do?” You don't actually love him? quote:“Tell me everything, Alice,” I begged. “I don’t understand. Why did you tell Jasper to stop Emmett, why can’t they come help us?” Edward's flair for the dramatic really is Romeo with superpowers. Romeo just had to settle for poisoning himself and monologuing over his love's "corpse", but Edward is going to cause an international incident and slaughter dozens of innocents because he can't just set himself on fire like a normal suicidal person. quote:I realized why her eyes begged for my understanding. She was protecting Jasper, at our expense, and maybe at Edward’s, too. I understood, and I did not think badly of her. I nodded. You're right! This doesn't make sense! He wasn't planning on coming back. How is her being dead any different from never seeing her again and purging her mementos of your existence? quote:“If he were listening,” she explained. “But believe it or not, it’s possible to lie with your thoughts. If you had died, I would still try to stop him. And I would be thinking ‘she’s alive, she’s alive’ as hard as I could. He knows that.” Kill Bella, leave Alice. quote:“Who are these Volturi?” I demanded in a whisper. “What makes them so much more dangerous than Emmett, Jasper, Rosalie, and you?” It was hard to imagine something scarier than that. Because clearly this guy would take their conversation seriously and begin investigating vampires, rather than just thinking they're talking about some book. quote:I leaned closer to Alice. Her lips were at my ears as she breathed the story. Authors really need to consider what their dialogue scenes would look like in practice. This is all a very long sequence of exposition, but it's being delivered by whispering and mumbling into each other's ears. Have you ever tried quietly whispering entire paragraphs into someone's ear? It gets annoying really fast. quote:“I’ve seen them,” I mumbled. “In the picture in Carlisle’s study.” Oh God. Vampire fascists. quote:“But if there are only five—” Alice and Bella's interactions are being described as more lustful than her interactions with Jacob. quote:“There’s a reason he called them royalty… the ruling class. Over the millennia, they have assumed the position of enforcing our rules—which actually translates to punishing transgressors. They fulfill that duty decisively.” The thing Bella hates the most! quote:“Shouldn’t somebody have mentioned this to me earlier?” I whispered angrily. “I mean, I wanted to be a… to be one of you! Shouldn’t somebody have explained the rules to me?” Bella would be the worst vampire. quote:“It makes sense, and most of us don’t need policing,” she continued. “But, after a few centuries, sometimes one of us gets bored. Or crazy. I don’t know. And then the Volturi step in before it can compromise them, or the rest of us.” Volterra is actually a real Italian city in Tuscany! Italy in general has a lower murder rate than average for the region and Tuscany in particular is quite safe. Edward going on a crazy killing spree would actually be one of the biggest news stories of the decade even if nobody caught directly supernatural phenomena on camera! quote:“But you said they didn’t leave. How do they eat?” That's...incredibly morbid and concerning. quote:“I doubt they’ve ever had a situation quite like this,” she muttered, disgusted. “You don’t get a lot of suicidal vampires.” Okay Bella has crossed the line from mere self-harm to suicidal ideation. quote:“Knock it off, Bella, or we’re turning around in New York and going back to Forks.” I think one of this book's biggest and most disturbing problems is that it not only has a protagonist who's gone completely off the deep end into mental illness and is barely functional through most of the plot, but it never seems to acknowledge it in a way that emphasizes how harmful it is. Everything is presented as a typical YA novel "Woe is me!" with all the gravitas of a teenage girl who got stood up at prom, not like it's extremely toxic and dangerous behavior that all of the characters should be worried by. Charlie is the only one who shows any real concern for her mental health, while her friends abandon her because she's too depressed and the one who displays open discomfort with her crazy moments is "evil." We all know that Bella gets Edward back in the end (otherwise how would you have more books?) and that's all it takes to cure her, without any need for therapy or positive coping mechanisms. While the books are infamous for their idealization of abusive behavior, I think it's equally or more harmful to also present young girls with the idea that therapy and mindfulness are unnecessary and all you need is to get what you want to cure your mental illness (which everyone will be accommodating for and not really care about much beyond mild concern). quote:“Let me concentrate, now. I’m trying to see what he’s planning.” Spoilers: it doesn't matter and they just get back together. quote:They showed a movie, and my neighbor got headphones. Sometimes I watched the figures moving across the little screen, but I couldn’t even tell if the movie was supposed to be a romance or a horror film. Aro just sort of awkwardly points at the torch near the door and shrugs. quote:We had to run for our connection, but that was good—better than having to wait. As soon as the plane was in the air, Alice closed her eyes and slid back into the same stupor as before. I waited as patiently as I could. When it was dark again, I opened the window to stare out into the flat black that was no better than the window shade. "Seriously, it's not that hard man. I'm not getting up for this." quote:“The Volturi?” I muttered, groggy. They've quickly figured out that it takes like, no effort at all to get him back to killing humans. quote:“What will he say?” I just realized something. The first book was never meant to have a sequel. What was Meyer's planned explanation for Edward's mind reading not working on her? Did she even have one? Was it just a way of leveling the playing field between them and his power just didn't work for no reason? quote:I sighed. “I really wish you could have been right about me. In the beginning, when you first saw things about me, before we even met…” Okay now it's getting gayer. quote:I stared at her, frozen with shock. Instantly, my mind resisted her words. I couldn’t afford that kind of hope if she changed her mind. Bella shouting at the ethereally beautiful 4'10 Manic Pixie Dream Girl to bite her in the middle of a crowded airplane. quote:“Shh,” she cautioned. The attendant was looking in our direction again. “Try to be reasonable,” she whispered. “We don’t have enough time. We have to get into Volterra tomorrow. You’d be writhing in pain for days.” She made a face. “And I don’t think the other passengers would react well.” Now? Like, literally now on the plane? quote:“No.” She frowned, her expression unhappy. “I don’t think I will. He’ll be furious, but what will he be able to do about it?” "I'm suicidal on a good day anyway!" quote:“You are so bizarre, even for a human.” Vampire Bella following Edward around as he throws himself dramatically on the steps of every church screaming in anguish, raging against God for forsaking him and allowing such a demon to exist, and poking him in the back of the head until he runs away. quote:“Go back to sleep,” she encouraged me. “I’ll wake you up when there’s something new.” We legit almost had Edward start a killing spree and only refuse because he was afraid his vampire dad would be upset with him. quote:“Will there be enough time?” As I spoke, there was a shift in the cabin pressure. I could feel the plane angling downward. I feel like most humans who saw that would just wonder why this weird pale guy covered himself in glitter and is standing dramatically in the middle of the town square. quote:I looked at the slight gray glow that shone through the opened windows. “We’ll be too late,” I whispered, my throat closing in panic. It's literally a pivotal part of the plot that Edward is saved only because he chose the most pointlessly melodramatic way to kill himself and it wasted so much time that you could fly halfway across the world to stop him. quote:The pilot came on over the intercom, announcing, first in French and then in English, our imminent landing. The seat belt lights dinged and flashed. Alice is so much loving cooler than Bella. quote:A bright yellow Porsche screamed to a stop a few feet in front of where I paced, the word TURBO scrawled in silver cursive across its back. Everyone beside me on the crowded airport sidewalk stared.  Another one the movie got right. The film car was a brand new Porsche 911 Turbo. quote:Alice was already weaving, too fast, through the thick airport traffic—sliding through tiny spaces between the cars as I cringed and fumbled for my seat belt. I understand now why Emmett and Alice are portrayed by fans as the Chaos Twins. How many times do you think she's just stolen random cars for a joyride? quote:“I’m sure that will be very comforting at the roadblock.” The filmmakers got really creative with this one.  quote:I was realizing what she meant when she’d said ironic. “They’re not going to be very happy if Edward messes things up for them on St. Marcus Day, are they?” Edward is basically ruining Volturi Christmas. quote:I looked away, fighting against my teeth as they tried to break through the skin of my lower lip. Bleeding was not the best idea right now. It would be a much better book! quote:The sun continued to climb in the sky while Alice raced against it. It was too bright, and that had me panicking. Maybe he wouldn’t feel the need to wait for noon after all.
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Sep 20, 2019 19:59
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Man this book must really loving suck if it can’t even be made fun of after 3 weeks.
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Oct 18, 2019 02:02
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Well I've been catching up on this thread and I can't help but notice the difference in how Bella thinks about Edward and Jacob. With Edward it's all about how perfect and gorgeous he is and Bella can't stand being away from him, whereas with Jacob it's like "yeah he's nice and funny and just a happy person and I genuinely like spending time with him". Y'know, like how an actual relationship works.
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Oct 18, 2019 03:26
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I noticed that too but Bella obviously doesn't notice it. She's pushed everyone away so has nobody she can talk to about the difference in feelings either, which keeps her feeling as if Edward is the only person she could ever love despite how much she obviously cares about Jacob.
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Oct 18, 2019 03:35
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chitoryu12 posted:Man this book must really loving suck if it can’t even be made fun of after 3 weeks. This book is loving godawful, of course. I was just waiting patiently for you to come back and finish it.
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Oct 18, 2019 15:38
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Victorkm posted:This book is loving godawful, of course. I was just waiting patiently for you to come back and finish it.
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Oct 18, 2019 17:10
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I should be back to this on Monday.
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Oct 18, 2019 17:26
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chitoryu12 posted:I should be back to this on Monday. 
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Oct 18, 2019 19:04
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https://twitter.com/sweetpoetato/status/1185446744412348416?s=21
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Oct 19, 2019 19:26
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chitoryu12 posted:Man this book must really loving suck if it can’t even be made fun of after 3 weeks. It's so bad I can't even think of anything witty any more.
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Oct 21, 2019 04:51
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Chapter 20: Volterraquote:We began the steep climb, and the road grew congested. As we wound higher, the cars became too close together for Alice to weave insanely between them anymore. We slowed to a crawl behind a little tan Peugeot. It's like trying to get into Disney in the summer! quote:“Alice,” I whispered urgently. Of course vampires would choose blood red as their celebratory color. Maybe the Volturi wanted Edward because he's extra enough for them. quote:“Bella.” Alice spoke quickly in a fierce, low voice. “I can’t see what the guard here will decide now—if this doesn’t work, you’re going to have to go in alone. You’re going to have to run. Just keep asking for the Palazzo dei Priori, and running in the direction they tell you. Don’t get lost.” Alice drives like a baby boomer with a sense of entitlement. quote:The man at the gate wore a matching uniform. As we approached him, the throngs of tourists passed, crowding the sidewalks, staring curiously at the pushy, flashy Porsche. Thousand dollar bills were discontinued in 1969 due to lack of use and concerns about their use in organized crime and counterfeiting. So few of them existed even at the time of this book that they were worth multiple times their face value. quote:“Is this a joke?” he mumbled. Make Alice the protagonist. quote:He looked at her, his eyes staring wide. I glanced nervously at the clock on the dash. If Edward stuck to his plan, we had only five minutes left. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cV7z6HG0EKM quote:She pointed to where the street widened into a patch of bright openness. “There—we’re at the southern end of the square. Run straight across, to the right of the clock tower. I’ll find a way around—” Heavy because she's fat or because Bella has virtually no muscle mass? quote:Coming out of the dark lane, I was blinded by the brilliant sunlight beating down into the principal plaza. The wind whooshed into me, flinging my hair into my eyes and blinding me further. It was no wonder that I didn’t see the wall of flesh until I’d smacked into it. Good summary of the series. quote:I hoped Alice would get out. I hoped that she would see me from some dark shadow and know that I had failed, so she could go home to Jasper. What scream? Why would anyone respond to a guy covered in body glitter by screaming in horror? quote:But there was a break in the crowd—I could see a bubble of space ahead. I pushed urgently toward it, not realizing till I bruised my shins against the bricks that there was a wide, square fountain set into the center of the plaza.  quote:They moved more readily for me now, avoiding the icy water that splattered from my dripping clothes as I ran. I glanced up at the clock again. Is there a loving hurricane going on here? How windy is it? quote:A little family of four stood nearest to the alley’s mouth. The two girls wore crimson dresses, with matching ribbons tying their dark hair back. The father wasn’t tall. It seemed like I could see something bright in the shadows, just over his shoulder. I hurtled toward them, trying to see past the stinging tears. The clock tolled, and the littlest girl clamped her hands over her ears. We're about to have a dramatic "just in time" rescue because he won't even open his drat eyes. quote:I’d never seen anything more beautiful—even as I ran, gasping and screaming, I could appreciate that. And the last seven months meant nothing. And his words in the forest meant nothing. And it did not matter if he did not want me. I would never want anything but him, no matter how long I lived. Oh goddammit. quote:“Edward,” I tried to gasp, but my voice had no sound. “You’ve got to get back into the shadows. You have to move!” Edward you idiot. quote:“We’re not dead, not yet! But we have to get out of here before the Volturi—” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-c9-2KcnLXI The movie can't make this scene look any less stupid. quote:I peeked under his arm to see two dark shapes detach themselves from the gloom.  Felix was played by the 6'7 Daniel Cudmore, who you probably recognize as Colossus in the X-Men film series up through Days of Future Past before he was replaced in the Deadpool movies. He also got to play the live action Master Chief in the Halo 4: Forward Unto Dawn web series and has a history as a stunt performer and television actor, especially for sci-fi and fantasy series where his massive build suits him well for monsters and mutants. He's the middle of three children, and all of them are around his size. Must be a loud house. quote:“Shh,” he murmured, only for me. I've recently been rereading The Dresden Files. They've been made fun of on this forum before, but I like them. It's another excellent contrast to the Twilight series because of how little Meyer does to make these villains actually seem menacing. Jim Butcher incorporates incredibly elaborate, emotional descriptions of people, places, and the use of magic that actually give you an idea of what everything is supposed to feel like beyond just surface appearance. For the Volturi, the most we've got are "They're big and wear robes and I'm scared." Just like Bella's cliff dive, a dramatic moment is ruined by a tone that seems like a flat line all the way through. quote:Edward didn’t move an inch. He was dooming himself by protecting me.  Demetri was played by Charlie Bewley, who grew up as a farmboy in Leicester. His career is more subdued than some of the other actors here, but he would return to form with The Vampire Diaries as Galen Vaughn, vampire hunter. quote:“We’re not alone,” she reminded them. It's supposed to be a tense scene, but the dialogue makes it sound like a 19th century business meeting. quote:Edward’s teeth came together audibly. “No.” I dunno, I've seen some pretty boys. quote:Her size was so insignificant that the reaction to her appearance confused me. Felix and Demetri relaxed immediately, stepping back from their offensive positions to blend again with the shadows of the overhanging walls.  Oh poo poo, it's Dakota Fanning! 15 years old, the famous child actress was starting to move into slightly more mature roles; just a year later she would rejoin Kristen Stewart in The Runaways where they played Cherie Currie and Joan Jett respectively. She's continued a star-studded career, recently appearing as Squeaky Fromme in Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, but this was around the time she first began establishing herself as more than just a screaming kid to worldwide audiences. quote:Alice folded her arms across her chest, her expression impassive. Edward is just getting bombarded with images of Bella being the biggest danger-prone idiot in the Pacific Northwest. quote:There was a loose curve to the alley, still slanting downward, so I didn’t see the squared-off dead end coming until we reached the flat, windowless, brick face. The little one called Jane was nowhere to be seen. Oh now making a dive is too scary for you? quote:Edward took my wrists—his hands felt like stones in winter—and lowered me into the blackness. The Volturi are finally going to meet the human that Edward is so obsessed with and they're just "...really?" quote:Edward held me tightly. He reached his free hand across his body to hold my face, too, his smooth thumb tracing across my lips. Now and then, I felt his face press into my hair. I realized that this was the only reunion we would get, and I clutched myself closer to him. Is Bella going to keep up this vaguely suicidal bent for the rest of the series? quote:I wished I could ask him exactly what was going to happen now. I wanted desperately to know how we were going to die—as if that would somehow make it better, knowing in advance. But I couldn’t speak, even in a whisper, surrounded as we were. The others could hear everything—my every breath, my every heartbeat. Violently rubbing against a marble statue to heat myself with friction. quote:We hurried through the tunnel, or it felt like hurrying to me. My slow progress irritated someone—I guessed Felix—and I heard him heave a sigh now and then.
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Oct 21, 2019 20:05
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quote:“I can’t believe how quick it was. I didn’t feel a thing—they’re very good,” he mused, closing his eyes again and pressing his lips against my hair. His voice was like honey and velvet. “Death, that hath sucked the honey of thy breath, hath had no power yet upon thy beauty,” he murmured, and I recognized the line spoken by Romeo in the tomb. The clock boomed out its final chime. “You smell just exactly the same as always,” he went on. “So maybe this is hell. I don’t care. I’ll take it.” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-c9-2KcnLXI&t=106s The movie does a way better job here, honestly. Edward has more emotions in five-ish words there than he does in that entire quoted paragraph. He even smiles at her.
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Oct 24, 2019 16:29
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Chapter 21: Verdictquote:We were in a brightly lit, unremarkable hallway. The walls were off-white, the floor carpeted in industrial gray. Common rectangular fluorescent lights were spaced evenly along the ceiling. It was warmer here, for which I was grateful. This hall seemed very benign after the gloom of the ghoulish stone sewers. "I no longer feel temperature. All is numb and cold." quote:He pulled me along, and Alice walked on my other side. The heavy door creaked shut behind us, and then there was the thud of a bolt sliding home. The Volturi are thousands of years old but their taste in decor is firmly in the "boring middle management" category. quote:In the middle of the room was a high, polished mahogany counter. I gawked in astonishment at the woman behind it. YES I AM SURE BELLA SWAN HAS A HARD TIME COMPREHENDING THIS quote:She smiled politely in welcome. “Good afternoon, Jane,” she said. There was no surprise in her face as she glanced at Jane’s company. Not Edward, his bare chest glinting dimly in the white lights, or even me, disheveled and comparatively hideous.  Gianna was played by Justine Wachsberger, who bounced between France and Los Angeles in her childhood. Along with various minor TV and film roles, her most prominent appearance was the recurring role of Lauren in the Divergent film series. As I have no interest in exposing myself to more by-the-numbers young adult dystopian sci-fi series, I have no idea who that is. quote:On the other side of the wooden doors was a different kind of reception. The pale boy in the pearl gray suit could have been Jane’s twin. His hair was darker, and his lips were not as full, but he was just as lovely. He came forward to meet us. He smiled, reaching for her. “Jane.”  Alec was played by 16-year-old Cameron Bright, looking like a kid who went to Hot Topic in 2007 and later got really obsessed with the Joker. He courted serious controversy in 2004 with Birth, where he played a young boy who claims to be the reincarnation of Nicole Kidman's dead husband. The movie included scenes of them kissing and in a bathtub together (thankfully wearing nude swimsuits instead of actually being naked), which is all it takes for me to never watch this movie and have some questions for the writer and director. He later appeared as Leech in X-Men: The Last Stand and his roles since have thankfully been much less creepy. quote:“They send you out for one and you come back with two… and a half,” he noted, looking at me. “Nice work.” Even the Volturi follow the sacred "dibs" rule. quote:Edward turned, a low snarl building deep in his chest. Felix smiled—his hand was raised, palm up; he curled his fingers twice, inviting Edward forward. I thought the same and checked. We're 77% of the way through the book. quote:They ignored the doors at the end of the hall—doors entirely sheathed in gold—stopping halfway down the hall and sliding aside a piece of the paneling to expose a plain wooden door. It wasn’t locked. Alec held it open for Jane. Finally, a true goth! quote:“Jane, dear one, you’ve returned!” he cried in evident delight. His voice was just a soft sighing.  Aro is one of the most memorable Volturi, probably because he's played by the ever-perfect Michael Sheen. Sheen is a Tumblr fandom darling, who you can see alongside David Tennant in Good Omens, and everyone seems to have had some form of sexual awakening with one of his roles. quote:He glided to Jane, took her face in his papery hands, kissed her lightly on her full lips, and then floated back a step. Aro wanted in on that parking lot fight club she and Emmett started in North Dakota. quote:“You’re too modest,” Aro chided. “I’ve seen some of your more amazing exploits, and I must admit I’ve never observed anything like your talent. Wonderful!” He touches Emmett and is bewildered by all the bears. quote:“But to be able to hear from a distance…” Aro sighed, gesturing toward the two of them, and the exchange that had just taken place. “That would be so convenient.”  Marcus is Christopher Heyerdahl, who previously played Todd on Stargate Atlantis and would later appear as Thor Gunderson, the enigmatic gunman known as "The Swede" in Hell on Wheels.  Caius is a cross-fandom darling. He was played by a young Jamie Campbell Bower, who had previously appeared as Anthony in Tim Burton's Sweeney Todd film and would go on to appear as a young Gellert Grindelwald in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows and Jace Wayland in The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones. You may notice that a lot of Twilight fans also share these interests, and Bower is consequently lusted after by teenage girls the world over. quote:Their lack of interest did not curb Aro’s enjoyment. Or they just like the added drama of being flanked by hot bodyguards. You'd think they would put them in nicer outfits though. quote:Aro was shaking his head. “Amazing,” he said. “Absolutely amazing.” I'm going to commission fan art of Droopy Dog as a Volturi. quote:“It’s just so difficult to understand, even now,” Aro mused, staring at Edward’s arm wrapped around me. It was hard for me to follow Aro’s chaotic train of thought. I struggled to keep up. “How can you stand so close to her like that?” Being a generally interesting person? quote:“I certainly never thought to see Carlisle bested for self-control of all things, but you put him to shame.” What? No he didn't! Not only did Carlisle maintain the same self-control around Bella (being able to stitch her wound at the beginning of the book without a single flinch), he's the only vampire we've seen in the entire series who never fed on a human! Virtually all of Edward's supposed virtues exist only in the text telling us he has them. quote:“I am gratified by his success,” Aro mused. “Your memories of him are quite a gift for me, though they astonish me exceedingly. I am surprised by how it… pleases me, his success in this unorthodox path he’s chosen. I expected that he would waste, weaken with time. I’d scoffed at his plan to find others who would share his peculiar vision. Yet, somehow, I’m happy to be wrong.” So much praise is being heaped on Edward that I almost wonder if he wrote this. quote:Edward gazed back at Aro’s admiration with no expression. I knew his face well enough—time had not changed that—to guess at something seething beneath the surface. I fought to keep my breathing even. And Bella takes another level of weird. quote:Edward nodded in encouragement—whether because he was sure Aro would not hurt me, or because there was no choice, I couldn’t tell. Is she actually immune or is there just nothing in there? quote:My eyes flickered to Edward, and, though his face was composed, I thought he seemed a little smug. I've never encountered such beige prose in popular fiction since middle school. There are Goosebumps books with more vivid descriptions. quote:Jane was smiling only at him now, and it all clicked together. What Alice had said about formidable gifts, why everyone treated Jane with such deference, and why Edward had thrown himself in her path before she could do that to me. This scene has all the emotional impact of Meyer reciting her shopping list. The movie at least has something. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hEXsOOVWuGA quote:Aro inclined his head toward me. That's Bella's special ability. She can somehow nullify the psychic powers of any other vampire. I don't think it receives any further explanation or justification. quote:Jane hissed in frustration, leaning forward like she was preparing to spring. That scene probably looked like something from What We Do in the Shadows. quote:Edward glared, disgusted. I'm not sure on the actual proportion of vampires with powers. We see a ton of vampires (especially with the way Eclipse goes), but the Cullens and Volturi have a high concentration and a lot of the vampires are seen very shortly or not at all, making it impossible to tell if they had any ability. quote:Caius looked away with a caustic expression. Jane’s eyes sparked with indignation at the comparison. One thing I do like about this scene is that Edward is trying to be his usual dramatic self, making himself the centerpiece of everything and snarling at the Volturi, when none of them could care less about his theatrics. I'm not sure if Meyer intended for him to come off so lame, but that's what's happening. quote:“Aro,” Caius hissed. “The law claims them.” Bella tears her collar off and leaps into Edward's arms. quote:Aro smiled, happy again. “Why, then you would be free to go home and give my regards to my friend Carlisle.” His expression turned more hesitant. “But I’m afraid you would have to mean it.” Everything that's going on and it's still all about her. quote:Edward stared down at me with a tortured expression. The Volturi are an interesting group. They're not really villains, despite their creepiness and the film's propensity to put them in black medieval robes and Michael Sheen acting like...well, Michael Sheen. They do eat humans like typical vampires, but they're only really interested in keeping the peace and ensuring that vampires don't get hunted into extinction or do anything too destructive (for the aforementioned reason). They find the Cullens odd, but are otherwise on polite terms with them and let them do their thing as long as they follow the rules. And killing Bella does make sense from their perspective of keeping vampires a secret, enough so that I can't find it a truly villainous action. One issue with this is that it leaves the book somewhat deprived of any real antagonist. For almost the entire story, the only source of conflict was the protagonist's own self-destructive and manipulative behavior driven by a severe case of mental illness. With Bella's mind serving as the antagonist, it falls to Meyer to adequately resolve the conflict with it. We never get that resolution because Bella gets her boyfriend back and all of the problems from earlier are instantly solved. She never has to make any progress learning or improving herself, and in fact continued to waver between manic and suicidally depressed all the way until that moment. quote:Caius looked bitterly disappointed—a feeling he seemed to share with Felix and Jane. We're not even out of danger yet and Bella's already having another mood swing! quote:“Then we are free to go now?” Edward asked in an even voice. Everyone just sits around awkwardly in the waiting room. quote:“And here,” Aro added, motioning to Felix with one finger. Felix came forward at once, and Aro unfastened the gray cloak the huge vampire wore, pulling from his shoulders. He tossed it to Edward. “Take this. You’re a little conspicuous.” Michael Sheen really was the best casting choice they could have ever made. quote:Demetri gestured that we should follow, and then set off the way we’d come in, the only exit by the look of things. Oh, it's a buffet! quote:Edward pulled my face against his chest, but it was too late. I already understood.  Heidi (named after Stephenie Meyer's sister) was played by Canadian model Noot Seear, a competitor with Booboo Stewart for weirdest name. She had a short-lived acting career beginning at the age of 16 in an episode of Cold Squad, but has only had a few roles since then. quote:“Demetri,” she responded in a silky voice, her eyes flickering between my face and Edward’s gray cloak. chitoryu12 fucked around with this message at 21:28 on Oct 24, 2019 |
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Oct 24, 2019 21:16
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The Voluri actually remind me a little of the Camarilla from White Wolf's Vampire:the Masquerade RPG...traditionalist, secretive, contemptuous of humanity, and obsessed with keeping the existence of vampires a secret.
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Oct 24, 2019 22:49
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Epicurius posted:The Voluri actually remind me a little of the Camarilla from White Wolf's Vampire:the Masquerade RPG...traditionalist, secretive, contemptuous of humanity, and obsessed with keeping the existence of vampires a secret. I would suggest an inspiration if I thought Meyer consumed any media as interesting as VTM. It’s yet another of the missed opportunities that makes you want another author in charge. According to online information, the original Volturi (Aro, Caius, and Marcus) are actually Greek despite the Roman names. Presumably they followed many aspects of Greek civilization and adopted Roman names and culture as the empire conquered its way across Europe. Later books get into Ancient Egyptian vampires, and I can’t stress enough how cool such stories would be compared to this.
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Oct 24, 2019 22:59
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I mean, the Voluri are still more interesting than Bella or Edward. They're really pale and pretty. Jane is psychic. Aro is preternaturally cheery. They have their own town and goons and beautiful female bodyguards. So there's all sorts of potential there. So maybe I missed the explanation, but do we ever get anything explaining why Bella's blood is so appealing to vampires?
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Oct 25, 2019 02:58
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Epicurius posted:I mean, the Voluri are still more interesting than Bella or Edward. They're really pale and pretty. Jane is psychic. Aro is preternaturally cheery. They have their own town and goons and beautiful female bodyguards. So there's all sorts of potential there. Some folks are just tastier than others, I think.
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Oct 25, 2019 03:12
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Wait, wasn't Bella affected by Emmett's emotion changing power in the first book? So she's immune to all vampire powers except Alice's fortune telling and Emmett's ability to manipulate emotions? This kind of poo poo makes me really appreciate writers like Sanderson actually plotting out books and having some idea of what makes a character special rather than just making them the focus character and telling everyone they're special.
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Oct 25, 2019 07:14
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Jasper's emotion powers. And Aro and Edward can't read her mind, but Alice can read her future and Marcus can read her relationship status. It never made sense to me either. What's the difference between Jasper mentally affecting her mood and Jane mentally affecting her pain receptors?
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Oct 25, 2019 09:55
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MorgaineDax posted:Jasper's emotion powers. And Aro and Edward can't read her mind, but Alice can read her future and Marcus can read her relationship status. It never made sense to me either. What's the difference between Jasper mentally affecting her mood and Jane mentally affecting her pain receptors? gently caress I didn’t even notice that. Edit: Now that I think about it, it's likely that Meyer (when she wrote the original book as a stand-alone personal project) only intended for Bella to be immune to Edward. When she decided to do a sequel she came up with the idea for many vampires having psychic powers and Bella being super special and immune to them, but forgot that she had shown other powers working before. chitoryu12 fucked around with this message at 17:49 on Oct 25, 2019 |
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Oct 25, 2019 13:33
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Chapter 22: Flightquote:Demetri left us in the cheerfully opulent reception area, where the woman Gianna was still at her post behind the polished counter. Bright, harmless music tinkled from hidden speakers. Oh God we really are going to get an extended scene of them waiting in the reception room. quote:“Are you all right?” Edward asked under his breath, too low for the human woman to hear. His voice was rough—if velvet can be rough—with anxiety. Still stressed by our situation, I imagined. Yes! Do it! quote:Then I understood. Oh. The noise was me. The ripping sound was the sobs coming from my chest. That’s what was shaking me. Has anyone actually had this happen to them in real life? Where they don't realize they're the ones making a noise because they're too hysterical? Also, who describes the sound of sobbing as ripping? quote:“It’s all right, you’re safe, it’s all right,” he chanted again and again. He pulled me onto his lap and tucked the thick wool cloak around me, protecting me from his cold skin. Just think that a few days ago she would have gladly been in line to join them! quote:“Is there anything I can get you?” a voice asked politely. It was Gianna, leaning over Edward’s shoulder with a look that was both concerned and yet still professional and detached at the same time. It didn’t seem to bother her that her face was inches from a hostile vampire. She was either totally oblivious, or very good at her job. So is Bella calling herself oblivious, or... quote:“No,” Edward answered coldly. "You've spent how long demanding to be turned into a vampire and you've chosen now to be grossed out by it?" quote:As I stared at his too beautiful face, trying to understand the change, it suddenly struck me that I was really here, in Edward’s arms, however fleetingly, and that we were not—at this exact moment—about to be killed. And she has a way more interesting man! quote:I couldn’t keep my eyes off of Edward’s face for long. I stared at him, wishing more than anything that the future would never happen. That this moment would last forever, or, if it couldn’t, that I would stop existing when it did. Jesus. quote:“Don’t be ridiculous.” He sighed; his sweet breath caressed my face. “I’ve never been in better control of that side of my nature than right now.” Is there a more awkward way to hold a conversation than rapidly whispering it while staring someone else dead in the eyes? quote:“What was all that talk about singers?” Alice asked at one point. Yes, give me more of the Volturi's centuries-old culture! Anything but this! quote:I was tired enough to sleep, but I fought against the weariness. I wasn’t going to miss a second of the time I had with him. Now and then, as he talked with Alice, he would lean down suddenly and kiss me—his glass-smooth lips brushing against my hair, my forehead, the tip of my nose. Each time it was like an electric shock to my long dormant heart. The sound of its beating seemed to fill the entire room. I'm sure Meyer thought this was a really clever and artistic turn of phrase, but I'm just being reminded of Bella literally suffering a heart attack from being kissed in the first book. quote:I lost track of the time completely. So when Edward’s arms tightened around me, and both he and Alice looked to the back of the room with wary eyes, I panicked. I cringed into Edward’s chest as Alec—his eyes now a vivid ruby, but still spotless in his light gray suit despite the afternoon meal—walked through the double doors. We could have easily cut most of this chapter and gotten the book done a lot quicker. quote:We left through a tastefully luxurious lobby. I was the only one who glanced back at the medieval castle that housed the elaborate business facade. I couldn’t see the turret from here, for which I was grateful. Edward is one of those annoying vampires who likes to loudly scoff at vampire books when he passes them in the store. quote:I didn’t notice when Alice disappeared from beside me. I looked over to ask her a question, and she was gone. Bella how loving long has it been since you brushed your teeth? quote:“She’s stealing a car, too, isn’t she?” I guessed. MAKE ALICE THE PROTAGONIST INSTEAD quote:It seemed like a very long way to the entryway. Edward could see that I was spent; he wound his arm around my waist and supported most of my weight as we walked. I forgot to mention this, but while Volterra is a real city the film actually shot in Montepulciano about 70 miles away. Both towns look very similar, but Montepulciano is slightly larger and denser and the filmmakers decided that it better suited Meyer's descriptions (what little we get...). quote:He led me toward a dark car, waiting in a pool of shadow to the right of the gate with the engine running. To my surprise, he slid into the backseat with me, instead of insisting on driving. It's almost like Meyer is hinting at how much cooler the other characters are than Bella and Edward just to gently caress with us. quote:Edward kept me tight in his arms. Inside the gray cloak, I was warm and comfortable. More than comfortable. How loving low is her tolerance? One can of Coke is going to keep her up all night? quote:Alice was behind us. I could hear her murmuring to Jasper on the phone. I swear this must be where Lani Sarem got the name for her protagonist. quote:So I kept drinking soda, and resisting even the urge to blink. Edward seemed perfectly content to hold me in his arms, his fingers tracing my face again and again. I touched his face, too. I couldn’t stop myself, though I was afraid it would hurt me later, when I was alone again. He continued to kiss my hair, my forehead, my wrists… but never my lips, and that was good. After all, how many ways can one heart be mangled and still be expected to keep beating? I’d lived through a lot that should have finished me in the last few days, but it didn’t make me feel strong. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u_nPp64OrBc quote:Neither Alice nor Edward was surprised by the reception that waited for us at Sea-Tac airport, but it caught me off guard. Jasper was the first one I saw—he didn’t seem to see me at all. His eyes were only for Alice. She went quickly to his side; they didn’t embrace like other couples meeting there. They only stared into each other’s faces, yet, somehow, the moment was so private that I still felt the need to look away. What loving lame apology is that? You tried to commit suicide! You almost did it through committing mass murder in public! You don't get to loving grin and be sarcastic! quote:“Thank you, Bella,” Carlisle said. “We owe you.” How the hell am I going to handle two more books of Bella being this pathetic to watch? quote:I think I was mostly asleep, though I was still walking, when we reached their car. The surprise of seeing Emmett and Rosalie leaning against the black sedan under the dim lights of the parking garage revived me some. Edward stiffened. I mean, sort of? She was just one of several people all making the worst possible decision they could at every step when it came to Bella. quote:“Let her make amends,” Esme pleaded. “We’ll ride with Alice and Jasper.” I missed Emmett. quote:“Let her sleep,” Edward insisted, but his voice was a little warmer. Let's look at this from Charlie's perspective. He's already not completely cool with Edward when this book begins because of the narrative that they broke up and Bella ran away back to Phoenix over it, leading to her tumbling down the stairs and falling out a window because of her absurd clumsiness. They got back together, but he has reason to be suspicious of their relationship's fragility. After she gets hurt at her birthday party, Edward suddenly becomes incredibly cold and emotionless, dumps her, takes back all of his presents and pictures of him, and flees the state. This drives Bella into a hysterical breakdown wavering between self-destruction and severe depression for months that she refuses to get any professional help for. She spends time with a new boy, but starts coming back injured so often that he doesn't even notice at a certain point. He doesn't notice her consistent screaming nightmares either. Then on the day of his best friend's funeral, Bella disappears. She leaves a hasty note claiming that her ex is in trouble and she needs to save him. She's gone and can't be located for days, and is now being returned to the house half-conscious in the arms of the boy that ruined her so badly. He has no idea of knowing that she just intentionally deprived herself of sleep. She could be hurt, or drugged, or sick, or any number of things. Who knows how much is this douchebag albino's fault? I'm just saying Edward is lucky Charlie isn't putting two in his chest here. quote:Edward tried to pass me to Charlie, but I clung to him with locked, tenacious fingers. I could feel my dad yanking on my arm.
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Oct 25, 2019 18:04
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In better hands, the Bella being horrified by Gianna wanting to be turned into a vampire could be done as a nice piece of irony and with good effect. It would be, here's Bella, whose only real experience with the vampires is the Cullens, and who has this romantic view of vampires meeting the Volturi and the way they treat humans like cattle, along with all the horrors of feeding, and that's Bella learning the real nature of vampirism and being repelled by it. It would be a nice piece of character growth for her, and at the same time, reinforce e the nobility of the Cullens...that they choose to set themselves above and apart from this behavior. In better hands, that is.
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Oct 25, 2019 19:22
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Epicurius posted:In better hands, the Bella being horrified by Gianna wanting to be turned into a vampire could be done as a nice piece of irony and with good effect. It would be, here's Bella, whose only real experience with the vampires is the Cullens, and who has this romantic view of vampires meeting the Volturi and the way they treat humans like cattle, along with all the horrors of feeding, and that's Bella learning the real nature of vampirism and being repelled by it. It would be a nice piece of character growth for her, and at the same time, reinforce e the nobility of the Cullens...that they choose to set themselves above and apart from this behavior. I did think that they would lean more into the irony, since Edward makes a face at Bella when she says it, but they just drop it entirely so we can get paragraphs upon paragraphs describing the flight home and her desperate attempt to stay awake via Coca-Cola. In case you thought this book could go any slower, the entire next chapter is a single conversation!
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Oct 25, 2019 19:46
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Not gonna do the entire thing because it's so dreadfully dull, but another outtake from the first book on Meyer's website is an alternate Chapter 20. The novel originally dragged even worse than it does already, including covering as much of Bella's escape to Phoenix as possible. Marvel as we get every detail possible of them stopping at a mall, getting her new clothes and some food, and finishing the drive to the hotel where we learn exactly how they checked in and got her a toothbrush from downstairs!
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Oct 26, 2019 23:25
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Chapter 23: The Truthquote:I had the sense that I'd been asleep for a very long time—my body was stiff, like I hadn’t moved once through all that time, either. My mind was dazed and slow; strange, colorful dreams—dreams and nightmares—swirled dizzily around the inside of my head. They were so vivid. The horrible and the heavenly, all mixed together into a bizarre jumble. There was sharp impatience and fear, both part of that frustrating dream where your feet can’t move fast enough.… And there were plenty of monsters, red-eyed fiends that were all the more ghastly for their genteel civility. The dream was still strong—I could even remember the names. But the strongest, clearest part of the dream was not the horror. It was the angel that was most clear. Are we still really doing this? Close to the end of the book and she's still talking about how she's crazy and such a terrible person oh silly me? quote:I opened my eyes again—and Edward was still there, his perfect face just inches away from mine. No! We already did this once with Edward! You don't get to recycle that to pad out the page length 3 chapters later! quote:Edward frowned, too. “You’re not dead.” Yes, this was all a giant waste of time and typing! quote:“Did all of that really happen, then?” It was almost impossible to reassign my dream as reality. I couldn’t wrap my head around the concept. Technically Italy can also be to the west!  quote:“I’m not tired anymore.” It was all coming clear now. “What time is it? How long have I been sleeping?” Are we supposed to be on Bella's side here? She's done everything possible to torment her father, and now she's going to go and yell at him that she's 18 and he can't do anything about it. quote:“What’s the story?” I asked, genuinely curious, but also trying desperately to keep the conversation casual, to keep a firm grip on myself, so I wouldn’t scare him away with the frantic, gnawing craving that was raging inside me. Probably something with copious amounts of property damage. quote:And I was comforted. Who cared what I had to deal with later? Every second that he was here—so close, his flawless face glowing in the dim light from the numbers on my alarm clock—was precious and not to be wasted. All of your dreams were the same before. You've never had imagination! quote:He sighed. “If I tell you, will you finally believe that you’re not having a nightmare?” It's a good thing we have Bella doing all the lying because Edward is godawful. quote:“I don’t understand.” You've got a great relationship when your boyfriend's apology for dumping you wavers between "I'm the worst person alive" and "Your new friends are awful." quote:“Stop,” I interrupted him. He stared at me with agonized eyes, and I tried to find the right words—the words that would free him from this imagined obligation that caused him so much pain. They were very hard words to say. I didn’t know if I could get them out without breaking down. But I had to try to do it right. I didn’t want to be a source of guilt and anguish in his life. He should be happy, no matter what it cost me. This suddenly reminded me of a bit from Midnight Sun where Edward marvels at how Bella doesn't wear makeup because her skin is perfectly smooth and free of blemishes. quote:“Edward,” I said. His name burned my throat a little on the way out. I could feel the ghost of the hole, waiting to rip itself wide again as soon as he disappeared. I didn’t quite see how I was going to survive it this time. “This has to stop now. You can’t think about things that way. You can’t let this… this guilt… rule your life. You can’t take responsibility for the things that happen to me here. None of it is your fault, it’s just part of how life is for me. So, if I trip in front of a bus or whatever it is next time, you have to realize that it’s not your job to take the blame. You can’t just go running off to Italy because you feel bad that you didn’t save me. Even if I had jumped off that cliff to die, that would have been my choice, and not your fault. I know it’s your… your nature to shoulder the blame for everything, but you really can’t let that make you go to such extremes! It’s very irresponsible—think of Esme and Carlisle and—” It would make a lot more sense than the explanation you're about to give! quote:I could feel the blank incomprehension on my face. “Didn’t you?” You loving should! The entire point of the story is that Romeo and Juliet are impulsive kids! Their death is tragic because of how everyone makes the situation worse at every step! quote:“But I still don’t understand,” I said. “That’s my whole point. So what?” I am too! quote:He stared deep into my eyes with his sincere, earnest gaze. I....what? quote:I didn’t answer. I was too shocked to form a rational response. “I could see it in your eyes, that you honestly believed that I didn’t want you anymore. The most absurd, ridiculous concept—as if there were any way that I could exist without needing you!” Maybe that you loving told her that you were breaking up with her and left her alone in the woods with your super speed? And you forbid your family from ever replying to her emails and had them remove every trace of your existence from her room? What was she supposed to do, keep running after you insisting that you were lying and still loved her? Get out of here with that bullshit. quote:And so I started to cry. The tears welled up and then gushed miserably down my cheeks. Because you went to the greatest extreme of breaking up short of murdering her! quote:“It never made sense for you to love me,” I explained, my voice breaking twice. “I always knew that.” This is also true! quote:His eyes narrowed, his jaw tightened. This is getting deeply uncomfortable. quote:He stopped, his lips just half an inch from mine. These are definitely people who love each other. quote:“Just answer it. Please.” Was this supposed to be romantic? Edward just mocked Bella for being so stupid as to think that all of his carefully curated efforts to break up with her (with the aid of his family) were in any way believable while she tried to convince herself that she was dreaming and having a fake conversation. We just witnessed a creep bullying a sleepy girl and are expected to like it. quote:When I was starting to get dizzy, he pulled away, only to lay his ear against my heart. Was that another heart attack? quote:I lay there, dazed, waiting for my gasping to slow and quiet. Don't forget that black eyes mean he hasn't fed and could chew her throat out at any time! quote:“No—not lying.” I shook my head, trying to think it through coherently. To examine the hypothesis that he did love me, while staying objective, clinical, so I wouldn’t fall into the trap of hoping. “You could mean it… now. But what about tomorrow, when you think about all the reasons you left in the first place? Or next month, when Jasper takes a snap at me?” This is hilarious. If Bella hadn't thrown herself full force into self-destructive behavior and taken a cliff dive during a hurricane, within another chapter or two Edward probably would have been sailing into her room begging for forgiveness. Like Edward's suicide attempt and meeting the Volturi, the plot only happened because of everyone doing the worst thing at every possible decision point. quote:I grimaced. “Be serious, please.” I hope you're ready for Stephenie Meyer to fancy herself a poet. quote:“Before you, Bella, my life was like a moonless night. Very dark, but there were stars—points of light and reason.… And then you shot across my sky like a meteor. Suddenly everything was on fire; there was brilliancy, there was beauty. When you were gone, when the meteor had fallen over the horizon, everything went black. Nothing had changed, but my eyes were blinded by the light. I couldn’t see the stars anymore. And there was no more reason for anything.” This is like something a high school student wrote for Drama class. quote:I wanted to believe him. But this was my life without him that he was describing, not the other way around. I suddenly thought of how Robert Pattinson in real life is an admitted slob. quote:“Tracking wasn’t a distraction then?” I asked, curious, and also needing to distract myself. I was very much in danger of hoping. I wouldn’t be able to stop myself for long. My heart throbbed, singing in my chest. How godawful do you have to be to track someone to the wrong continent? quote:“You were hunting Victoria?” I half-shrieked as soon as I could find my voice, shooting through two octaves. Hey I want you to take a guess how much of a threat Victoria actually is when she fights the Cullens herself. quote:Charlie’s distant snores stuttered, and then picked up a regular rhythm again. Go ahead. Guess how long the fight lasts. quote:“It’s too late for her. I might have let the other time slide, but not now, not after—” People snort a lot in these books. quote:Edward looked as if he were about to say something, and then thought better of it. His teeth clicked together, and he spoke through them. “Really?” he asked. “Then what would be your greatest problem? That would make Victoria’s returning for you seem like such an inconsequential matter in comparison?” The greatest defense against vampires: they straight up forget how time works. quote:Horror washed through me. Me in 3 years. quote:So his promises meant nothing, in the end. If I were going to turn thirty someday, then he couldn’t be planning on staying long. The harsh pain of this knowledge made me realize that I’d already begun to hope, without giving myself permission to do so. "I don't want to drat you to immortality and eternal oblivion upon death" is a lot better of a reason than "Meh, we'll break up in a century anyway." quote:“Yes?” he asked, waiting for my question. This is a different level of weird. quote:His eyes were liquid onyx and utterly sincere. He spoke as if he’d put endless amounts of thought into this asinine plan. Even I want to interrupt this bizarre manchild now. quote:“Let’s just back up for a minute,” I said; feeling angry made it so much easier to be clear, decisive. “You do remember the Volturi, right? I can’t stay human forever. They’ll kill me. Even if they don’t think of me till I’m thirty”—I hissed the word—“do you really think they’ll forget?” "We'll live out of a van off the grid. I can steal food from convenience stations and you break into houses to shower." quote:We glowered at each other for a long minute. Massive, terrifying amounts! quote:“None. He’ll blame me, not you.” It takes no goddamn effort to get this girl to hurt herself on purpose! quote:“Okay,” he sighed. “I’ll give you a ride.”
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Oct 28, 2019 15:25
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So here's what I don't get, and maybe it's because I'm over 30 and therefore ancient, but why is Bella so casual about this being a vampire thing? She-s been stalked and tortured by two vampires, she's seen how the Volturi treat humans as cattle, she's heard Carlisle's story about the amount of guilt and self doubt he has over his vampirism, Edward has told her how not killing humans and holding on to human morality is a constant struggle, Jasper went into bloodlust when she got a paper cut and tried to feed on her, and the Blacks told her how vampires are the enemies of humanity. So given all this, you'd expect at least some hesitation or self reflection?
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Oct 28, 2019 21:24
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Epicurius posted:So here's what I don't get, and maybe it's because I'm over 30 and therefore ancient, but why is Bella so casual about this being a vampire thing? She-s been stalked and tortured by two vampires, she's seen how the Volturi treat humans as cattle, she's heard Carlisle's story about the amount of guilt and self doubt he has over his vampirism, Edward has told her how not killing humans and holding on to human morality is a constant struggle, Jasper went into bloodlust when she got a paper cut and tried to feed on her, and the Blacks told her how vampires are the enemies of humanity. Bella is either dumb as a rock or gets off on danger too much to seriously consider her position.
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Oct 28, 2019 21:55
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Epicurius posted:So here's what I don't get, and maybe it's because I'm over 30 and therefore ancient, but why is Bella so casual about this being a vampire thing? She-s been stalked and tortured by two vampires, she's seen how the Volturi treat humans as cattle, she's heard Carlisle's story about the amount of guilt and self doubt he has over his vampirism, Edward has told her how not killing humans and holding on to human morality is a constant struggle, Jasper went into bloodlust when she got a paper cut and tried to feed on her, and the Blacks told her how vampires are the enemies of humanity. She doesn't see Carlisle's brand of vampire the same as the others and is in looooove with Edward and wants to be with him forever while they are the same physical age. Bella is the only one who knows she is the ultimate vampire mary sue and won't experience any of the issues that other vampires do such as insatiable thirst and lack of self control when they are first turned.
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Oct 29, 2019 02:14
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The best answer I can personally give for her ignorance of the dangers is that her obsession with Edward overrides everything else. We've already seen how her obsession runs so deep that breaking up with him drives her to near-suicidal destruction for 6 months with no sign of her ever losing it until she finally dies. Her only reason for becoming a vampire is "I want to spend eternity with Edward." It actually hits a pretty harsh roadblock with Edward's lack of belief in an afterlife for vampires. Only a little bit of thinking tells you that they can't actually spend eternity together as vampires, because one day the world will end. Humanity will die off, the Earth will be swallowed by the sun, and after a sufficient amount of time you get the heat death of the universe. And that's assuming none of them do anything that gets them prematurely killed earlier. As far as Edward can see it, transforming Bella would only give them an extension on their relationship, not a permanent stay, and he'd be condemning her to something he finds horrifying in return.
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Oct 29, 2019 03:08
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I guess one of the things I'm wondering is, how does Meyer expect us to view Bella? We know that Bella is an unreliable narrator, and has some pretty wrong ideas about vampires, relationships, herself, etc, and other characters call her out on them; Edward, Charlie, Alice, Jacob. So, I think the question is, does Stephanie Meyer know she's written such a flawed protagonist? In other words, is Bella supposed to be an idiot?
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Oct 29, 2019 03:51
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Epicurius posted:I guess one of the things I'm wondering is, how does Meyer expect us to view Bella? We know that Bella is an unreliable narrator, and has some pretty wrong ideas about vampires, relationships, herself, etc, and other characters call her out on them; Edward, Charlie, Alice, Jacob. So, I think the question is, does Stephanie Meyer know she's written such a flawed protagonist? In other words, is Bella supposed to be an idiot? I think it’s differing opinions on a “flawed protagonist.” We generally want our viewpoint character to be complex and flawed but also likable and pleasant to follow. Bella is flawed, but in ways that make her aggravating to be around, and it’s hard to tell where character moments are supposed to be intentionally showing that complexity or if they’re Meyer not getting how relationships and emotions work. Something really telling is that the best characters actually have very little conflict or change over time. The rest of the Cullens are settled in their roles and relationships and get to express their positive qualities more often, without Meyer needing to shoehorn in sudden overblown dramatics. They get to just be.
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Oct 29, 2019 04:55
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chitoryu12 posted:I think it’s differing opinions on a “flawed protagonist.” We generally want our viewpoint character to be complex and flawed but also likable and pleasant to follow. Bella is flawed, but in ways that make her aggravating to be around, and it’s hard to tell where character moments are supposed to be intentionally showing that complexity or if they’re Meyer not getting how relationships and emotions work. I think you really hit it here. Compare Bella to the main character (or any character really) in Mr. Robot, where everyone is a terrible person in their own way but it’s still a compelling story.
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Oct 29, 2019 05:01
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Chapter 24: Votequote:He was not pleased, that much was easy to read in his face. But, without further argument, he took me in his arms and sprang lithely from my window, landing without the slightest jolt, like a cat. It was a little bit farther down than I’d imagined. Bella was about to break her loving ankles over this. quote:“All right then,” he said, his voice seething with disapproval. “Up you go.” Did Bella permanently become an adrenaline junkie from this book? quote:I turned my face toward him and pressed my lips into the cold stone skin of his neck. "I'm at a mild level of suicidal ideation at any given time." quote:He’d slowed to a walk—I could only tell because the wind ceased—and I guessed that we weren’t far from the house. In fact, I thought I could make out the sound of the river rushing somewhere close by in the darkness. Oh yeah, Bella's not learning poo poo from this book. Having a pathological obsession with your love interest's attention is portrayed as cool and good in this series and becoming self-destructive and depressed when "true love" leaves you is romantic. quote:Even in the darkness, I could see the anguish twist his face—it reminded me of his expression under Jane’s torturing gaze; I felt sick, and regretted speaking the truth. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha Imagine if Bella loving found those before getting back with Edward. Her mind would have completely snapped. quote:He nodded, seeming slightly cheered by my obvious pleasure in this trivial fact. It wasn’t enough to heal the pain in his face completely. Whoops! quote:“Well, just one voice. Yours. It’s a long story.” The wary look on his face made me wish that I hadn’t brought that up. Would he think I was crazy, like everyone else? Was everyone else right about that? But at least that expression—the one that made him look like something was burning him—faded. Bella this is the poo poo you just don't talk about! You pretend it never happened and never bring it up to anyone! quote:His words came out half-strangled. “You… were… risking your life… to hear—” This is like a loving black comedy now. quote:I thought of that night in Port Angeles when I’d had my first delusion. I’d come up with two options. Insanity or wish fulfillment. I’d seen no third option. Holy poo poo, I was right! The book is going to keep treating schizoaffective disorder as a good thing! She doesn't need therapy, just her true love! Christ. gently caress this series, man. This was read by kids. You've got preteen girls reading this and getting told that not only is emotional abuse a secret sign of love and easily forgiven as long as he's a "soulmate", but that your desires to self-harm and isolate yourself out of grief are actually a positive sign of your capacity to love and everything will be fine as long as you get to stay together with your boyfriend. It's a spectacularly, dangerously disgusting book. quote:"Oh!" In his head he's trying to remember Washington's involuntary hold laws. quote:My heart inflated like it was going to crack right through my ribs. It filled my chest and blocked my throat so that I could not speak. Your soul is pretty significant in a theological sense Bella quote:He took my face tightly between his cool hands and kissed me until I was so dizzy the forest was spinning. Then he leaned his forehead against mine, and I was not the only one breathing harder than usual. We really did get the two most boring characters to follow, didn't we? "What are your side characters doing?" "Oh that one's restoring a colonial mansion, they're on a 50th honeymoon to Africa, he's going to medical school at Oxford again..." "Okay, what about the protagonists?" "Hurting themselves, crying, and sleeping all day." quote:I was deeply relieved that he really seemed to understand—comforted that this all made sense to him. At any rate, he wasn’t looking at me like I was crazy. He was looking at me like… he loved me. Yeah, gently caress your family right? quote:He led me through the open front door into the dark house and flipped the lights on. The room was just as I’d remembered it—the piano and the white couches and the pale, massive staircase. No dust, no white sheets. I wonder if the Cullens love having a human they can be themselves around. Just use their super speed all the time and seem like they're teleporting around the house. quote:I nodded. “I’d like to talk to everyone at once, if that’s okay. About something important.” Not even for board game night? quote:As soon as I turned to sit in the chair, I saw that we were not alone. Esme had followed Edward, and behind her the rest of the family filed in. "Including the stuff about the suicidal behavior and werewolves?" quote:They waited patiently while I tried to order my thoughts. What would she actually do with regards to going to Volterra, though? They would turn her just as well if they didn't want to kill her, but Edward would inevitably try to stop her from going. This ties back into what I brought up during the first book: the power difference between Edward and Bella is so impossibly high due to his powers that she has no more authority over herself than what he gives. He can stop her with no effort, to a degree that even the most controlling and abusive human husband can't. quote:“Just a minute,” Edward interrupted. "What about the fact that Jasper and Alice's power worked on you?" "Shhh!" quote:“And how does that solve anything?” But they have other senses! Vampires have superhuman vision, hearing, and smell! What are they going to do, knock Bella out and wrap the entire house in pots of burning garlic? quote:He and Emmett exchanged a glance and a smirk. Found the smart ones. quote:I straightened up in my chair, focusing. This was my meeting. We haven't gotten to Rosalie's story in the books yet, but it's pretty brutal. quote:I nodded slowly, and then turned to Emmett. Emmett isn't as complex as Bella but still manages to be more interesting and likable. quote:I was still grimacing at that when I looked at Esme. Remember: permanently a moody 17-year-old until the end of time. quote:I flinched, and spoke quickly. “That’s all I needed. Thank you. For wanting to keep me. I feel exactly the same way about all of you, too.” My voice was jagged with emotion by the end. You're not even going to prepare? You just snuck out on your dad! What are they going to do, bring you back and come up with some excuse why you're convulsing to death in your room for 3 days? quote:Alice stared at me, her eyes widening with terror. Struggling to speak because of your boyfriend yanking you around the room by your jaw. This is cool and good. Edward is true love! quote:“Hold on,” Edward said between his teeth. “It doesn’t have to be now.” Bella's being really casual about her boyfriend physically abusing her in front of his family. quote:“Of course you can,” I said sourly. “Now let go of me.” What are you telling them to do, kill the loving deputies? quote:This was always the hardest part. Charlie, Renée. Now Jacob, too. The people I would lose, the people I would hurt. I wished there was some way that I could be the only one to suffer, but I knew that was impossible. Also at some point you have to, you know, tell them you're a vampire. Just you showing up with cold, rock-hard skin and a different eye color should clue them in that something's up. There's absolutely no way to hide this! quote:“In the interest of remaining inconspicuous,” Edward said, still talking through his gritted teeth, but looking at Carlisle now, “I suggest that we put this conversation off, at the very least until Bella finishes high school, and moves out of Charlie’s house.” Charlie deserves so, so much better than you! quote:I pursed my lips. “I’ll consider it.” "We need another two books to maximize profit!' quote:“Ugh,” I groaned, throwing myself back on the bed and pulling the quilt over my head. Edward likes older women! quote:My face twisted into an expression somewhere between chagrin and horror. I promise, that's not as great as you think it will be. quote:He thought for a minute. “All right. Forget time limits. If you want me to be the one—then you’ll just have to meet one condition.” The tone of the book is so flat that even Bella didn't recognize the gravity at first. quote:“Edward, please be serious.” Do you still count as a gold digger if your 110-year-old millionaire husband is immortal? quote:I looked away, out the dark window, trying to control the panic before it gave me away. What? No it wasn't. The problem was Renee being an immature brat who got bored and took advantage of her husband's parents to take their kid away from him. quote:He inhaled deeply. “Please don’t tell me that you’re afraid of the commitment,” his voice was disbelieving, and I understood what he meant. But it was her loving fault! The problem isn't that she "married young", it's that she's incredibly selfish and childlike! Even as an adult approaching middle age she's barely functional! quote:“Because she’d rather you became one of the eternal damned than get married.” He laughed darkly. This series would be a lot better if the Cullens immediately detoured from the plot to have a Vegas vacation. quote:I groaned again. I have to take this literally whenever she says it now. quote:He gauged my expression for a second. “Would it be childish of me to hide in your closet, then?” This is just the story of three assholes manipulating each other until two of them get married. quote:My door cracked open. All right, let's see how much remorse Bella shows for tormenting her dad in the worst way possible over the past year! quote:My eyes narrowed. So it was going to be threats, was it? Two could play at that game. I sat up, pulling the quilt around me. “Because I won’t go.” Oh. It's....it's absolutely none. Great. quote:His face turned bright red. He took a few deep breaths before he answered. You idiot. quote:“I guess I didn’t tell you about that,” I choked out. “It was nothing. Just messing around, swimming with Jake. Anyway, Rosalie told Edward, and he was upset. She sort of accidentally made it sound like I was trying to kill myself or something. He wouldn’t answer his phone, so Alice dragged me to… L.A., to explain in person.” I shrugged, desperately hoping that he would not be so distracted by my slip that he’d miss the brilliant explanation I’d provided. As far as he's concerned, he's absolutely right! Edward is the worst person she could ever have in her life! quote:“Fine,” I said curtly. I know we've read A Handbook for Mortals and Ready Player One, but somehow Bella is turning out to be the least likable protagonist I've ever read. quote:“Not under my roof,” Charlie stormed. This is infuriating. quote:I threw off my quilt, and Edward was already there, sitting in the rocking chair as if he’d been present through the whole conversation. If I didn't have any kind of determination to finish this series, I'd have put it down long before this point. quote:His jaw tightened. “So eager for eternal damnation,” he muttered. You do realize that you proved him wrong, right? He was so happy to find out that he really did have a soul and got to be in heaven with his true love forever, and he turned out to be wrong. Now he's back to square one with the added worry of damning his love as well. quote:He got up slowly, and came to put his hands on either side of my face as he stared into my eyes. “Forever,” he vowed, still a little staggered. I am very thankful to say there's only one chapter left.
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Oct 29, 2019 17:04
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And then we can move on to a somewhat better book.
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Oct 29, 2019 20:46
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