- Maugrim
- Feb 16, 2011
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I eat your face
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I can't tell if he's telling us to play it or warning us away from it. Fortunately the book doesn't ask us to make that call. Take his advice.
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Oct 26, 2019 22:57
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 14, 2024 17:49
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- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
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Let's show off how much we've learned from videogames. Hand-Eye!
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Oct 27, 2019 01:07
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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Ernie seems trustworthy enough so far. Let's take the Hand-Eye Challenge!
quote:
You decide to trust Ernie. You stroll over to the Hand-Eye Challenge.
Big Al lets out a sinister laugh and disappears in a puff of brown smoke.
“This looks like a good game,” you declare. You have good coordination. Maybe the game will be something like juggling.
“I don’t know,” Floyd says doubtfully. “I never do well at that kind of stuff.”
“That’s why we’re not asking you to play,” Patty tells him, snickering.
A pretty young woman sits behind the counter of the booth. A green silk eye patch covers her right eye. She seems almost normal. Friendly, even.
Then the young woman smiles at you – revealing big yellowish-brown fangs.
You jump back, startled.
quote:
You bump into Patty and Floyd, who are right behind you. They have no place to go. A huge crowd of the strange carnival people surround you at the Hand-Eye Challenge booth.
You shiver. The carnival people stand watching silently. It gives you the creeps. They seem very interested in the outcome of the game. You almost feel as if they’re rooting for you!
“This is a test of hand-eye coordination,” the young woman explains, smiling broadly. Her fangs glisten in the light of the game sign.
You try to smile back, which isn’t easy. Her breath smells as if she’s been eating skunk casserole.
“These are for you,” she says. She holds out two long, thin daggers.
Your eyes widen. Daggers? What sort of test is this, anyway?
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“What do I need these for?” You try to sound confident, but your voice cracks as you ask the question.
The woman smiles, revealing her fangs again. This time you step back to avoid her stinky breath. “All you have to do is hold the daggers out at arm’s length and touch one point to the other,” she explains.
Phew! That seems pretty simple.
“Of course,” the young woman goes on, “you have to do it with one eye closed.” Her hand goes to the scrap of green silk she wears. “You can borrow my patch if you like.”
“N-no, thanks,” you stammer. No way do you want to see what’s under there! “I can just close one eye.”
Okay, now take the test. Use long, sharp pencils instead of daggers. Hold a pencil in each hand, with the point aiming straight up. Stretch out your arms as far as they’ll go on either side of you. Close one eye. Then, bending your elbows, try to touch one pencil point to the other.
It’s harder than it sounds, so we’ll give you three tries.
If you managed to make the points touch, turn to PAGE 90.
If you missed all three times, turn to PAGE 130.
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Empty
Goal Endings: 1/2
Bad Endings
Overwhelmed and strangled by an army of baby squid.
Sent back in time by the Dino-Ride and eaten by a T-rex.
Achievements
Squid Wrestling Lightweight Champion: Defeated 225 pounds' worth of baby squid.
Dying is Easy, Consistency is Hard: Encountered a total of 250 bad endings.
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Oct 27, 2019 22:49
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- AceOfFlames
- Oct 9, 2012
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Nailed it.
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Oct 27, 2019 23:01
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- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
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I actually failed
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Oct 28, 2019 12:25
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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Looks like Ernie's advice was spot-on. That game was easy!
quote:
“You are lucky!” a voice shouts.
“You win a prize!” someone else in the crowd cries.
You smile back at the game operator, who only scowls back at you. But before you can say anything, you hear a loud, staticky voice shouting over the crowd:
“MAKE-WAY, MAKE-WAY!”
The mob parts, and a strange robot pushes through. Its legs seem almost like human limbs, except that they’re made of metal. But the robot has no arms or head. And its body is a big electronic screen. It looks like a walking signboard!
“What’s this?” Floyd asks.
“I-AM-YOUR-PRIZE,” the robot’s voice bleeps.
Patty snorts. “It looks like a giant digital clock,” she comments.
“Can you give the time?” you ask the robot. This thing could make a great talking alarm clock!
“PREPARING –“ The screen flashes brilliantly several times
quote:
A series of numbers appears on the robot’s body. They look like this:
01:00:00:03
01:00:00:02
01:00:00:01
01:00:00:00
00:59:59:59
The number in the far-right column reels down incredibly quickly.
You stare at the weird numbers, trying to make sense of them.
Floyd points at the robot screen. “Those must be the hours,” he says, indicating the numbers in the left-hand column.
“So the next ones are the minutes,” you say, catching on. “And the ones after that are seconds, and then fractions of a second.”
Patty lets out a low whistle. “That’s exact!”
“Yeah, but it still doesn’t tell us the time, exactly,” you argue. You watch numbers fly by in the seconds column on the display. “What kind of clock is this?” you ask.
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“I-THOUGHT-YOU-WANTED-TO-KNOW-THE-AMOUNT-OF-TIME-YOU-HAD-REMAINING,” the robot responds.
You stare at the display of numbers.
“Less than an hour to midnight!” Patty gulps.
Floyd checks his watch. “That’s right.”
“And if we haven’t escaped by then...” You trail off.
Two ideas come to you. One is to figure out a way to use the robot to help you escape.
The other is to forget about playing these creepy games, go straight to Big Al, and challenge him to the grand finale. Why keep wasting time?
But you can’t decide. You tell Floyd and Patty your ideas.
“Go for it! Straight for Big Al!” Patty cries.
Figures, you think. Patty never seems to be afraid of anything.
Your cousin the computer whiz smiles. “I bet I could tap into the robot’s memory banks and find a way out!” Floyd declares.
So, which plan will you go with?
Will you reroute the robot's circuits? Turn to PAGE 18.
Will you battle Big Al? Turn to PAGE 60.
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Empty
Goal Endings: 1/2
Bad Endings
Overwhelmed and strangled by an army of baby squid.
Sent back in time by the Dino-Ride and eaten by a T-rex.
Achievements
Squid Wrestling Lightweight Champion: Defeated 225 pounds' worth of baby squid.
Dying is Easy, Consistency is Hard: Encountered a total of 250 bad endings.
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Oct 29, 2019 22:51
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- Leraika
- Jun 14, 2015
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Luckily, I *did* save your old avatar. Fucked around and found out indeed.
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let's hack the poo poo out of this robot
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Oct 29, 2019 22:58
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- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
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Science 100
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Oct 30, 2019 00:12
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- AceOfFlames
- Oct 9, 2012
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Oct 30, 2019 02:39
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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In the last timeline, Floyd was tech-savvy enough to figure out how to recalibrate a time machine on the spot, so we can probably leave the robot to him. I mean, it's not like he can fail at hacking hard enough to get us all killed, right?
quote:
“Do your stuff, Floyd,” you tell your cousin.
Floyd pats his pockets, then pulls out a big multiblade pocket knife. Using the screwdriver attachment, he removes the back of the signboard robot.
“WARNING! DO-NOT-TAMPER-WITH-THIS-UNIT!” the robot blares.
“Can you shut him up?” you ask. The voice is so annoying.
Floyd yanks a wire, and the voice cuts off. “Hmmm,” he mutters, fiddling inside the robot. You peer into the mass of wires.
“Something’s wrong!” Patty cries. “The clock on the screen has changed.”
You race around to the front of the robot. Patty is right. Single digits flash on the screen now.
9... 8... 7...
“What did you do, Floyd?” you demand.
“Nothing!” Floyd insists. “I just cut this wire, which leads to the self-detect system –“ He peers closer. “Wait. Does that say self-detect? Oh. Whoops.”
“What does it say, Floyd?” you ask.
“Um. Well. It says self-destruct,” Floyd mumbles.
Self-destruct? You stare at Patty, then at the screen.
3... 2... 1...
THE EN-KABOOM!
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Empty
Goal Endings: 1/2
Bad Endings
Overwhelmed and strangled by an army of baby squid.
Sent back in time by the Dino-Ride and eaten by a T-rex.
 Blown up by a robot after Floyd triggered its self-destruct function.
Achievements
Squid Wrestling Lightweight Champion: Defeated 225 pounds' worth of baby squid.
Dying is Easy, Consistency is Hard: Encountered a total of 250 bad endings.
Our options posted:
- Insist you're not a squid wrestler.
- Stay on the Dino-Ride.
- Ride the Log Zoom.
- Ride the Slug Subway.
- Turn left at the first junction.
- Leave the castle and head back down to the rides.
- Start playing the midway games right away.
- Don't listen to Ernie.
- Ignore Ernie's advice and choose the Lucky Day game.
- Lose the Hand-Eye Challenge.
- Battle Big Al after getting the robot.
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Oct 30, 2019 22:54
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- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
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Oh wait, I meant I failed the Hand-Eye!
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Oct 31, 2019 01:12
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- AceOfFlames
- Oct 9, 2012
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All right, I admit it. I have no pencils in my house so I did the test with chopsticks. I accept my disqualification from the Hand-Eye test.
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Oct 31, 2019 19:01
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- PumpkinBat
- Oct 22, 2012
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Ah, c'mon guys, Mom said we could ride the Slug Subway next! I never get to do what I want on these carnival trips!
Well, I guess since were in the midway, might as well try the Lucky Day game, never mind any revenant gangsters.
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Nov 1, 2019 15:21
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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Hand-eye coordination was never my strong suit either...
quote:
“I can’t believe I missed!” you yell in disgust.
You thought you’d lined up the points perfectly. But with one eye closed, you couldn’t tell what’s near and what’s far. The dagger points did not meet.
“I’m so sorry.” But the young woman doesn’t look sorry. In fact, she seems a lot less friendly now. Her rotten fangs flash again as she gives you an evil smile. “You’ll have to pay the price of losing. And keep paying – forever!”
“No way!” You clutch the daggers in your hands. “My friends and I are definitely leaving this carnival!”
You whirl around, and the crowd shrinks back.
They know you mean business!
Maybe this is what you should have done from the beginning – fought Big Al and his carnival creeps.
quote:
You glare at the crowd. Then you hear the rumble of thunder. You glance up. Clouds are gathering over the Carnival of Horrors.
Maybe this is the break you’ve been waiting for! “Looks like this carnival is about to close on account of rain,” you tell the woman with the fangs.
The carnival people leave a big circle around you and your friends. You clutch the daggers tightly and work your way through the crowd. You hear another crash of thunder.
That’s when the bolt of lightning hits you.
About a jillion volts of electricity strike the knife in your left hand and go right through you. You stagger around, smelling smoke. But you’re still standing.
You slap out a burning spot on your T-shirt. “Come on,” you urge Floyd and Patty. “Lightning never strikes twice –“
Another lightning bolt lands – this time on the knife in your right hand. Bolt after bolt of lightning hits, until bright blue sparks fly between your two knives.
You can’t tear your eyes off the dancing sparks. They seem to form six letters...
THE END
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Empty
Goal Endings: 1/2
Bad Endings
Overwhelmed and strangled by an army of baby squid.
Sent back in time by the Dino-Ride and eaten by a T-rex.
Blown up by a robot after Floyd triggered its self-destruct function.
Repeatedly struck by lightning after failing the Hand-Eye Challenge.
Achievements
Squid Wrestling Lightweight Champion: Defeated 225 pounds' worth of baby squid.
Dying is Easy, Consistency is Hard: Encountered a total of 250 bad endings.
Our options posted:
- Insist you're not a squid wrestler.
- Stay on the Dino-Ride.
- Ride the Log Zoom.
- Ride the Slug Subway.
- Turn left at the first junction.
- Leave the castle and head back down to the rides.
- Start playing the midway games right away.
- Don't listen to Ernie.
- Ignore Ernie's advice and choose the Lucky Day game.
- Battle Big Al after getting the robot.
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Nov 2, 2019 14:57
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- AweStriker
- Oct 6, 2014
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Fighting is a good idea but let's do it at a better time.
Fight Al with robot.
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Nov 2, 2019 15:32
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- Leraika
- Jun 14, 2015
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Luckily, I *did* save your old avatar. Fucked around and found out indeed.
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Ride the slubway
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Nov 2, 2019 15:33
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- PumpkinBat
- Oct 22, 2012
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With that avatar, I would have been disappointed if it had been any other choice.
Ride the Slug Subway!
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Nov 2, 2019 16:15
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- AceOfFlames
- Oct 9, 2012
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All aboard the Slug Subway.
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Nov 2, 2019 16:29
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- Leraika
- Jun 14, 2015
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Luckily, I *did* save your old avatar. Fucked around and found out indeed.
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woops
Leraika fucked around with this message at 17:09 on Nov 2, 2019
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Nov 2, 2019 16:40
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- PumpkinBat
- Oct 22, 2012
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I'm assuming the second vote is from the Goomy.
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Nov 2, 2019 16:55
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- Leraika
- Jun 14, 2015
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Luckily, I *did* save your old avatar. Fucked around and found out indeed.
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I'm assuming the second vote is from the Goomy.
the second vote is from my connection to SA making GBS threads itself and my not noticing until just now. Sorry, Rebonack!
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Nov 2, 2019 17:08
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- PumpkinBat
- Oct 22, 2012
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EDIT: It happened to me too.
PumpkinBat fucked around with this message at 17:19 on Nov 2, 2019
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Nov 2, 2019 17:16
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- chitoryu12
- Apr 24, 2014
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All slugs, all subway
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Nov 3, 2019 18:53
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- Rebonack7
- Aug 27, 2015
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The midway can wait for now. No way can we leave the Carnival without finding out what the Slug Subway is!
quote:
“I don’t care if you think I’m a wimp,” you tell Patty. “I’m not getting on that roller coaster.”
You walk away from the man with the cigar and the horn. “I’m trying the Slug Subway,” you call over your shoulder.
The person in charge of the Slug Subway is a smiling elderly woman with puke-green skin. “Oh, you’ll enjoy this ride,” she gushes.
She shows you the Slug Subway. It’s a long tunnel, lined with what looks like a gray carpet. But it’s not a rug. The floor is covered with oozing, slimy slugs!
“Too bad we don’t have any salt,” Patty mutters. “We could dissolve all those creepy-crawlies.”
The grandmotherly woman gasps. “My dear, these are pets, carefully trained. Watch!” She steps onto the carpet of slugs. She glides out for a couple of yards, then glides back.
She doesn’t move her feet – the slugs move her!
“They must be strong,” you say.
“Oh, they are strong,” the old woman says, beaming. “In more ways than one!”
quote:
The old woman winks at you. “Well, hop aboard.”
Shuddering a little, you step onto the carpet of slugs. They feel sort of icky under your feet. Once you have both feet firmly planted, you start to glide along.
Wild!
“Come on, guys,” you call to Patty and Floyd. “This is weird, but it’s kind of cool!”
They join you on the trip down the tunnel. It feels almost like surfing – except for the odd squirming sensation under your feet.
When you reach the halfway point, Floyd starts sniffing the air. “What’s that funny smell? It’s like burning rubber.”
You smell it too. Then you notice smoke coming from your cousin’s feet.
“Is there something wrong with your sneakers?” You ask.
“If there is, we all have the same problem.” Floyd points to you and Patty.
You gasp.
Smoke is rising from all your shoes!
quote:
The squirmy sensation under your feet is much stronger now. The vibrations feel as if they are coming right through the soles of your shoes.
Your shoes! The slug slime must be a very strong acid! It’s eating away the soles of your shoes!
“We’ve got to get out of here!” you yell. You take a step.
But the Slug Subway moves in the opposite direction.
You walk forward – but your feet are pulled backwards by the slugs!
You start to run. So do Patty and Floyd.
“Eeeeeeyah!” you howl. Your feet! The slime has eaten all the way through your shoes. Now you feel as if you’re running across a sandy beach on a hot day.
A very hot day.
You try running even faster, but you slip on the slimy slugs. You fall.
“Yahhhh!” It’s like landing in a red-hot frying pan. The slug slime coats your skin, burning it away. You, Patty, and Floyd scream for help. But no one comes to the tunnel.
Oh, well. Better luck next slime!
THE END
Character Sheet posted:
Inventory
Empty
Goal Endings: 1/2
Bad Endings
Overwhelmed and strangled by an army of baby squid.
Sent back in time by the Dino-Ride and eaten by a T-rex.
Blown up by a robot after Floyd triggered its self-destruct function.
Repeatedly struck by lightning after failing the Hand-Eye Challenge.
Rode the Slug Subway and got melted by slug slime.
Achievements
Squid Wrestling Lightweight Champion: Defeated 225 pounds' worth of baby squid.
Dying is Easy, Consistency is Hard: Encountered a total of 250 bad endings.
Our options posted:
- Insist you're not a squid wrestler.
- Stay on the Dino-Ride.
- Ride the Log Zoom.
- Turn left at the first junction.
- Leave the castle and head back down to the rides.
- Start playing the midway games right away.
- Don't listen to Ernie.
- Ignore Ernie's advice and choose the Lucky Day game.
- Battle Big Al after getting the robot.
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Nov 3, 2019 22:40
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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May 14, 2024 17:49
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Oct 26, 2019 22:57
