mysterious loyall X posted:

Very well, where should I begin? My sister bought me a nintendo switch. My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen-year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims, like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. A sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. If I was insolent, I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds. Pretty standard, really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fifteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shaven scrotum. At the age of eighteen, I went off to evil medical school. From there..

mysterious loyall X posted:

Very well, where should I begin? My sister bought me a nintendo switch. My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen-year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims, like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. A sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. If I was insolent, I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds. Pretty standard, really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fifteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shaven scrotum. At the age of eighteen, I went off to evil medical school. From there..

mysterious loyall X posted:

Very well, where should I begin? My sister bought me a nintendo switch. My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen-year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims, like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. A sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. If I was insolent, I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds. Pretty standard, really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fifteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shaven scrotum. At the age of eighteen, I went off to evil medical school. From there..

mysterious loyall X posted:

Very well, where should I begin? My sister bought me a nintendo switch. My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen-year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims, like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. A sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. If I was insolent, I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds. Pretty standard, really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fifteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shaven scrotum. At the age of eighteen, I went off to evil medical school. From there..

American McGay posted:

https://twitter.com/YachtClubGames/status/1194405229883576320

American McGay posted:

https://twitter.com/YachtClubGames/status/1194405229883576320

American McGay posted:

https://twitter.com/YachtClubGames/status/1194405229883576320

bump_fn posted:

https://twitter.com/MarioBrothBlog/status/1194528522582347776

mysterious loyall X posted:

Very well, where should I begin? My sister bought me a nintendo switch. My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen-year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims, like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. A sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. If I was insolent, I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds. Pretty standard, really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fifteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shaven scrotum. At the age of eighteen, I went off to evil medical school. From there..

Eugene V. Dubstep posted:

My sister gave me a Switch last year, played some Mario: Hat Edition on it and put it in a drawer. Then this year she gave me BotW. I'm a little ways into it and I'm wondering what the big deal is. The entire story is about 100 words long, and every character you meet rehashes it verbatim while you mash A. The puzzle shrines are uniformly easy. Besides the shrines, every task and combat encounter in the game seems to either be impossible or trivial, the difference being whether you've pumped enough spirit orbs into stamina or stockpiled enough good weapons. A good example of this is horse taming: a pure stat check, but with button prompts that misleadingly suggest you could tame a difficult horse if only you mashed Soothe faster. Whoever decided that the main way to craft food (that you need in huge quantities) would be to navigate 3 menus in order to drop 5 physics-enable items at a time into a fire should be shot. The low-contrast art style combined with poor lighting causes many scenes to appear muddy and flat.

The game's structure per se is nothing new. Like any Ubisoft open world game, you have roughly 5 categories of thing to do scattered at regular intervals across a number of regions that you explore by climbing towers. Then it mixes in the Arkham games' [array of gadgets that can bypass certain repeated obstacles], but only a couple of them are as useful or neatly integrated into other gameplay — that is, the bat-cape and grappling hook, e.g., added a lot to both mobility and combat, whereas the Slate gadgets are only rarely useful outside of their specific exploration/puzzle niches. The Slate is a gimmick, and I was sick of the unskippable "blue data drop" cutscene the second time I saw it.

I have other problems with BotW that I'd categorize as matters of taste: I wish weapon durability was much, much higher, for example. But I'll leave it there. The game is still basically fun to gently caress around in, and I love exploring its world, but I cannot understand all the superlatives you nerds heap on it.

mysterious loyall X posted:

Very well, where should I begin? My sister bought me a nintendo switch. My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen-year-old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims, like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. A sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. If I was insolent, I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds. Pretty standard, really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fifteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shaven scrotum. At the age of eighteen, I went off to evil medical school. From there..

HORMELCHILI posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rtpgt0xWF2g

HORMELCHILI posted:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rtpgt0xWF2g

El Spider posted:

Pablo Nergigante posted:

https://twitter.com/mariobrothblog/status/1195309685672427520?s=21

HolePisser1982 posted:

lmao

Lunchmeat Larry posted:

gah!!

In Training posted:

👀

Control Volume posted:

Before time began, before spirits and life existed, three golden goddesses descended upon the chaos that was Hyrule..

Din, the goddess of power...

Nayru, the goddess of wisdom...

and Farore, the goddess of courage...

Control Volume posted:

Before time began, before spirits and life existed, three golden goddesses descended upon the chaos that was Hyrule..

Din, the goddess of power...

Nayru, the goddess of wisdom...

and Farore, the goddess of courage...

Control Volume posted:

Before time began, before spirits and life existed, three golden goddesses descended upon the chaos that was Hyrule..

Din, the goddess of power...

Nayru, the goddess of wisdom...

and Farore, the goddess of courage...

American McGay posted:

https://twitter.com/MarioBrothBlog/status/1195752772114755590?s=19

In Training posted:

Dragon Quest Monsters is freaking sweet Lois.

Phantasium posted:

dang you made me think the switch or android port came out over here already.

unless they did and i'm blind.

In Training posted:

And yes I'm holding select while it boots

mycophobia posted:

what does that do

my morning jackass posted:

I just beat bayo 2 with Jeanne and I feel powerful. Only on hard tho I am not sure I could handle a infinite climax run with the timings tho

Scrub-Niggurath posted:

https://twitter.com/JennyENicholson/status/1198000240319590400?s=20