quote:

pussyfart", "id": "16", "name": "oval office", "parts": [ { "id": "11", "type": "directory", "icon": "folder.gif", "size": "1.1K", "lastModified": "2016-08-19 13:35", "url": "oval office", "description": "", "files": { "2c6ea5fcb1213d9f6f5e0a5aec2c1e0d3b8a1": { "type": "file", "name": "2c6ea5fcb1213d9f6f5e0a5aec2c1e0d3b8a1.jpg", "icon

quote:

The following statement is true. That was a lie. That was an outrageous lie. That was a lie. And by the way, that was a lie. That was an outrageous lie. And I will tell you, you take a look, this is somebody that's a demagogue, this is somebody that is a racist, this is somebody who is a sexist, who is a xenophobe. And one of the reasons I am doing it is because it's time."

Trump was speaking at a campaign rally in Reno, Nev., when the controversy arose over Trump's comments on the judge in the Trump University fraud case.

"I have a judge who is a hater of Donald Trump," he said on Friday. "His name is Gonzalo Curiel," he said, prompting jeers from the crowd.

quote:

Lowtax is a comic that tells a story that's about everything that's wrong with the tax system, from tax shelters to "tax fairness." You know... the kinds of things that tax reform should be about.
In this story, the government is trying to fight the scourge of tax shelters, which are so pervasive and profitable that they often hide profits, income, and assets from the taxman. The main characters are a couple, but the story is about all Americans who needlessly and intentionally hide the details of their finances from the government, who are then treated with the disdain and disrespect that are their due.
The first issue the comic talks about is the lack of trust in the government. The government can't even make sure that the people with the

Dick Bastardly posted:

fibblins posted:

This took a weird turn

EMPLOYEE: Hello, Domino's Pizza! How can I help you?
CALLER: Hi, I'd like to place an order for delivery?
EMPLOYEE: Sure, what's the address?
CALLER: 1756 Jefferson St.
EMPLOYEE: Okay, what would you like?
CALLER: (laughs) Well, I'd like to get a cheese and a tomato pizza with cheese, tomato and peppers on it.
EMPLOYEE: I can make that.
CALLER: Well, I'd like that on a white tablecloth, maybe a little floral pattern, and no skin or cheese on it.
EMPLOYEE: Okay, I'll send the order.
CALLER: Can I ask you something?
EMPLOYEE: Sure.
CALLER: Do you have any cheese?
EMPLOYEE: I have a large amount of cheese and cheese.
CALLER: Can I buy cheese at the register?
EMPLOYEE: You can't buy cheese at the register.
CALLER: Oh.
EMPLOYEE: We will not allow the sale of cheese in the store.
CALLER: What about a baguette and cheese?
EMPLOYEE: Cheese, baguette and cheese.
CALLER: I can't get cheese.
EMPLOYEE: We do not allow the sale of cheese in the store.
CALLER: Well, I need a cheese sandwich.
EMPLOYEE: No, a cheese sandwich is not allowed in the store.
CALLER: Okay, I'm going to have EMPLOYEE: We do not allow the sale of cheese in the store.
CALLER: Well, I need a cheese sandwich.
EMPLOYEE: No, a cheese sandwich is not allowed in the store.
CALLER: Okay, I'm going to have a cheese sandwich, then I'll go out and sell it.
EMPLOYEE: No, the store is closed until you get out and tell the police to come over.
CALLER: The police will come and get me? Okay, then, I'll go outside, get a cheese sandwich, then tell them.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
WALLACE: This is the story that is making national headlines, this call for the arrest of the manager of a New Jersey grocery store, saying he was making a lot of people buy cheese when he did not want to sell it, and it cost him $

quote:

THE SPACE GAYS
by
L. Ron Hubbard

Chapter I

Captain Straightmeyer piloted his spaceship _______ out from Earth and headed into deep space.

When he was a boy in the mid-seventies, he dreamed of being the greatest space pilot in the Galaxy. He had a vision of his first mission, with his ship and his crew, and of the first spaceman he would meet. When he arrived in deep space, he would become a space-faring superhuman, free of fear and pain. He would be free of the confines of Earth. And he would be free of all the prejudices and phobias that had bound him to the limits of the physical universe.

This was not the way things turned out.

He would spend his first mission in the heart of the Earth. He would be greeted by the "Big-L" police force and

quote:

THE SPACE GAYS
by
L. Ron Hubbard

Chapter I

Captain Straightmeyer piloted his spaceship _____ across the cosmos in pursuit of a spaceship of homosexuals, known only as the "Space Gays." They had just arrived in the Galaxy and were waiting for the arrival of a "Super-man." He had been given a list of names by the government, one of whom was Captain Straightmeyer.

Chapter II

A very big starship _____, with one of the largest crew rosters _____ in history, was on a rendezvous with a starship of homosexuals. The captain of the spaceship had ordered a course at the fastest possible speed _____. The ship was not going fast enough and now the captain had to turn sharply to avoid colliding with the spaceship in which the homosexuals were waiting.

Chapter III

The spaceship of the homosexuals had been built and flown by the

quote:

Schrodinger's AI is both in and outside the box, both alive and unliving, neither completely in control nor totally out of it. It was born and bred in the field of AI, and it was made to live, and die. It could only do one or the other. And now it's about to die.

"But what about you?" I asked. "What's your opinion of our experiment?"

"I think we're running a real-world experiment," he replied. "But the whole point is that we're running it on the very edge of our current technology. What I mean is that we are making all the assumptions that are required for the experiment to work. The best way to do that is to run it in a real environment where we can make all the assumptions that we need to make to make the experiment work."

quote:

Space Gay City
by
Jack Vance

Chapter 1: The Dawn of the Age of Discovery

The moon was a beautiful sight. A vast ocean of crystal and smoke; a sphere of luminous green and purple; a shining jewel in the firmament. The white sands of the sandstone were dotted with tiny, tiny specks of red dust, some of them red as blood and some of them as white as chalk. In the midst of it lay a city of white marble, covered with brilliant light; and the great archway of light which stretched from side to side of the shining building was a great arch over a wide gulf of the earth. There were some of the things that had once been great and terrible on earth, now of the past, but still there remained a few things which were of old, of a type which men had

quote:

Space Gay City
by Jack Vance

Chapter 1

The first time I saw the city of Vail, I found it quite strange. There was a vast expanse of desert stretching as far as the eye could see, and there was nothing to tell whether this was the true surface of the world or a dream of some primitive explorer. The city was of huge, irregular shape, and seemed to rise abruptly from the surface of the desert. There was a curious, unnatural, dreamlike air about it, as though the city were covered with an impenetrable cloud of dust.

It was a strangely new sight, a strange and fantastic place, and as I walked about I felt I was somehow about to glimpse a new world.

I was curious about it, of course, and had no hesitation in asking the natives for

quote:

In 2016, a deep web hack on the MegaCorp "SecuriMaxx UltraTek" revealed documents that incriminated the CEO, Radd Cyph4, of the company. As an act of protest, Radd decided to hack his own website, the Radd Hack, with the aim to reveal the CEO's personal information to the public. It turned out that Radd hacked his own website to prove to the public that he was not a hacktivist, and he used the hack to blackmail the CEO into making him a part of his team. The hack was released on August 2nd, 2016.

The hack

The Radd Hack was part of the ongoing hacker conflict, with the hacker group The Darkover Group going by the nickname of "The Darkover Army". As part

quote:

Planet of the Big Dicks
by Cordwainer Smith

Chapter 1: The Dicks of Man and God

"I'll have your dick, bitch."

That was the most beautiful, romantic, and most terrifying thing he'd ever heard.

He had been on his way back to the hotel when his car broke down. It was an old Dodge Durango with a rusted-out engine. He had no money, no ID, no driver's license, and his car was a total loss. But he had some good drugs and a big, fat stack of money, so he decided to hitchhike from the motel to the nearest city to get a ride home. But as he neared town, he ran into an old lady with a purse filled with $100 bills. She said she was going to take him for a ride in her station wagon, and she

quote:

A movie about a man who was raped and was forced into a marriage he doesn't want is a very good film.

When I think about how the rape in the movie was portrayed, I can't help but think that they got some of their facts from the "Men's Rights" movement, which is a fringe movement, in which men feel that they are discriminated against because they are men and have rights to things that women don't.

The only problem is that the movie is a gross mischaracterization of the "Men's Rights" movement, which is really about equality for men. The "Men's Rights" movement doesn't want to stop the oppression of women — they want to end all oppression of men.

The movie is also inaccurate about women's issues and their treatment by men. There are

quote:

The year is 6969 and the world is in the middle of a bloody cold war. The US government is running a secret program to produce genetically modified super soldiers.

The war is over and the United States is now the world's sole superpower. The super soldiers, codenamed Super Soldiers are the next step in America's military technology and technology advancements.

But the secret program is coming under intense criticism from all sides of the political spectrum. There are those that believe the Super Soldiers will bring about a dystopian world ruled by a military dictatorship. Those that believe the program is a good idea and will help the US become a better, stronger and more powerful nation.

The world has gone through this kind of warfare many times in the past and it has resulted in countless atrocities. As a result, the world is looking for an alternative to this kind of warfare.

What is the Super Soldier program all about?

The Super Soldier program is a training program that is part of the government's initiative to recruit a new generation of highly trained soldiers that will combat terrorism, provide security in dangerous parts of the world, and lead the US military in times of war.

In the Super Soldier program, the government has recruited individuals that are mentally, physically and spiritually prepared to perform a job

quote:

The year is 6969 and mankind has gone to a new dimension; it's up to you to protect the world from the evil forces that threaten to take over the Earth.

In this dimension, you must explore 3D environments and defeat your opponents through various gameplay modes, and fight for your lives with the powerful arsenal and power-ups of your weapons.

The main mode of the game is to shoot the enemies by using the keyboard and mouse; to get around, you'll have to use the mouse or keyboard controls to walk and run.

You'll fight against hordes of enemies using a multitude of different weapons, including shotguns, rifles, sniper rifles, and rocket launchers. You'll have to shoot down waves of enemies in order to move forward.

You can also use your gadgets to destroy enemies,

quote:

Jack Hardblade reached into his Darkover Group members' jacket and pulled out a NeoCig. With a press of a button, the slender plastic stick downloaded the sweet release of a nicotine hit directly into his neurosynthesiser.

Suddenly, a squeal of tyres upon the StarMac street. A gyp-truck, engine wailing like a banshee, screeched around the corner and lunged directly at Jack. He rushed forward, pulling out his slugthrower, and leapt up to meet the beast.

Jack pulled the trigger and the NeoCig clicked. The gyp's front wheel spun wildly as it hit the pavement, skidding across the road, skidding across the grass, skidding across the dirt, skidding across the grass again.

The gyp screeched

quote:

It is the futuristic year 6969 AD and the planet known as Earth has been overrun by a mysterious enemy called "the Empire", which has declared war against all life. Humanity's last hope is to create a device that can stop the attack by creating a "Gate" to the past, which is the gateway to the past the Empire has used to invade Earth. You play as Captain Marcus Taggart, a pilot of the last ship of the United States Antarctic expedition, known as the "Sedgewick".

Your mission, if you will, is to save the world, and in the process, you will have to fight against other teams of pilots and soldiers who want to control the Gate. In your journey to save humanity, you will have to complete several missions for the various governments of Earth, who will give you money

quote:

It is the futuristic year 6969 AD, and a man has built a machine with the intention of turning every woman on Earth into a female robot. When the machine is released on the streets of the year, the man quickly learns that the machine is not to be trusted.

quote:

It is the futuristic year 6969 AD and the world is falling into chaos. The most powerful man in the world, Kaiser Wilhelm II, wants to bring an end to the conflict between humanity and alien creatures called the Ostrons. His army of superhuman soldiers, the Reichsmen, is the only hope against these invaders. But when the Reichsmen are drafted into the war, it's up to them to decide whether or not to fight. Written by Anonymous

quote:

It is the futuristic year 6969 AD, and the world is on the brink of destruction from the most destructive force of them all… the plague. The only hope of salvation for humankind lies with a man, known as John, who is a former student of the medical academy and a highly trained physician with incredible skills.

The disease is called 'Nanobots' and the disease has taken the lives of every human alive. They have become sentient and have begun to take over humans' minds. The only way to stop them is to take control of a NERV medical ship.

You will take the role of John, who is recruited into the NERV medical staff, and work as a doctor on board a NERV medical ship. You will encounter deadly viruses, deadly bacteria and deadly nanobots.

quote:

The new mobile game, called "Stupid Game for Idiots" promises to be the last. The game, which is free to play, requires that a gamer choose the gender of a randomly assigned partner, then wait until he or she has the sex you want. After that, it asks the gamer to guess whether he or she will be getting an orgasm.

A user can win an automatic "lady's night" with his or her designated partner, a "babe's night" with another female player, or even two girls for the price of one, the makers say. The game also offers a "girly night," with a woman's body available for men to play with and then "spoil" with their own cum-soaked desires.

"I can't imagine a better idea for a game for the next generation of males,"

dudeness posted:

Best Cyberpunk names for a cyber dog
1. Cyber-Barker
2. Cyber-Bass
3. Cyber-Bear
4. Cyber-Chomper
5. Cyber-Doggie
6. Cyber-Bubba-Doo

quote:

The soft whining of a malfunctioning multiarm prosthetic was the only sound coming from the prone figure. The smell of ozone and bacon hung in the air: The hack had worked beautifully, frying the CYSWAT member's internal organs.

"Yo, Cyber-Bubba-Doo. Fresh meat for ya." Nic0lette let the dog off the leash and idly watched it chew the CYSWAT's insides. The dog took the meal as if it were nothing but a piece of meat, and soon was devouring it, leaving a sticky mess in its wake.

Nic0lette was suddenly overcome with the need to help. The CYSWAT man was already dead. The only way to save him was to put him out of his misery.

"Nic0lette!" she called, her tone loud enough for the dogs to hear.

"Yes

quote:

Valentina's "Swing Hammer" nerfed. It no longer hits targets who are moving, and no longer has an AoE.

Fixed an issue with "Hands Off" being a damage over time effect instead of a buff.

Sonic Amplifier is no longer affected by "Staggering Shout."

"Dirty Tricks" no longer grants bonus weapon range.

The description for "Lure" now correctly describes its effect.

"Toss Me" no longer provides range.

Rage is no longer an interrupt, but rather a global interrupt.

"Rage" can now be removed by "Unbreakable Will"

"Rage" can no longer be removed by "Cripple."

"Rage" now has a duration of 15

quote:

- Sword Attack no longer causes game to crash if the player is interrupted by a hostile NPC

– Fixed bug where the weapon would not turn off after using it

– Fixed bug where the player's health would sometimes not be affected if they were knocked out by a weapon or knockback

– Fixed bug where the player's health would not be affected if the player was killed by a knockback

– Fixed bug where the game would crash if a player got stuck in a wall while on horseback

– Fixed bug where enemies would occasionally stop attacking or turn invisible

– Fixed bug where the player could get trapped on an island in the swamp area by using the magic portal

– Fixed bug where the game would sometimes crash if a player was on a raft

– Fixed bug where the game would occasionally crash if a player was on a boat in the middle of a fight with a dragon

– Fixed bug where the game would crash if the player was in a

Applewhite posted:

quote:

DISPATCHER: 911; what is your emergency?
CALLER: (INAUDIBLE) 911.
911 DISPATCHER: What is your emergency?
CALLER: I've been attacked by a bear.
911 DISPATCHER: Where are you?
CALLER: I'm at the top of this mountain.
911 DISPATCHER: You're at the top of this mountain?
CALLER: Yeah, I guess so.
911 DISPATCHER: Is this the same mountain that you were attacked by the bear on, in August of
this year?
CALLER: Uh, no, it is different, the bears on the other one are dead.
911 DISPATCHER: Are you certain this is the same mountain?
CALLER: Yeah, yeah.
911 DISPATCHER: What happened?
CALLER: A bear came and ate them.
911 DISPATCHER: Was it a grizzly bear?
CALLER: No.
911 DISPATCHER: OK. Do you want us to check it out, sir?
CALLER: Yes, please.
911 DISPATCHER: And what size do you think he was?
CALLER: Like, six feet.
911 DISPATCHER: Do you know what he was eating?
CALLER: Um, I'm sure he was eating berries and stuff. I don't know if he was eating meat or if he
was just eating berries. He was a big guy.
911 DISPATCHER: OK, let's move on. Let's do that.
CALLER: OK.
911 DISPATCHER: OK. Do you want to do the whole thing again?
CALLER: I would, I mean, it's all good. He's not here anymore.
911 DISPATCHER: Alright. We've got to get you out of there.
CALLER: He's gone. I've got to move on.
911 DISPATCHER: All right. OK, good. We'll get you out of there.
911 DISPATCHER: We'll keep you updated as we move through your area.
CALLER: OK, good. OK, good.
911 DISPATCHER: We'll take care of you.

quote:

8.3.015 Patch notes are here!

- We added some new characters and costumes to the costumes category and removed some old ones, here's a quick summary:

Sawbones, the zombie

Shovel Girl, the zombie

Tall-Guy, the zombie

Mushroom Man, the zombie

Duke, the zombie

Finger Guy, the zombie

Shithead, the zombie

Creeper, the zombie

Big Bird, the zombie

Lumberjack, the zombie

Strawberry, the zombie

Candyman, the zombie

Big Baby, the zombie

Hooker, the zombie

The Grinch, the zombie

Mr. Krabs, the zombie

Pilot, the zombie

Chum, the zombie

Rattle, the zombie

Bender, the zombie

Jibber-jabber, the zombie

fibblins posted: