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What are your plans for the malcious AI
Create all the fake news I possibly can
Assist me in writing my erotic Goku fanfiction.
Come up with counterpoints for my stupid D&D arguments
Convince my mom that I have a girlfriend.
Make alt accounts and use those to create new posts on SA, to artificially inflate the DAU count.
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Doggles
Apr 22, 2007

Neelix: Egads, my leeola root is ruined! But what if I were to replicate food and disguise it as my own cooking?

La Forge: It is possible.

Troi: We could make an entirely new food.

Lwaxana Troi: What's in it for me?

Worf: I am curious, Wos. You could have your name on the new foods.

Lwaxana Troi: No!

Worf: Your name?

Lwaxana Troi: No. My name's Lwaxana, and I won't allow anyone else's name to be in a food I make.

Worf: Then you'll eat my food. [He hands her the food, and she eats it]

Lwaxana Troi: No.

(The replicator explodes. Riker and

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Mr. Lobe
Feb 23, 2007

... Dry bones...


Doggles posted:

Neelix: Egads, my leeola root is ruined! But what if I were to replicate food and disguise it as my own cooking?

La Forge: It is possible.

Troi: We could make an entirely new food.

Lwaxana Troi: What's in it for me?

Worf: I am curious, Wos. You could have your name on the new foods.

Lwaxana Troi: No!

Worf: Your name?

Lwaxana Troi: No. My name's Lwaxana, and I won't allow anyone else's name to be in a food I make.

Worf: Then you'll eat my food. [He hands her the food, and she eats it]

Lwaxana Troi: No.

(The replicator explodes. Riker and

I want to believe

Cough Drop The Beat
Jan 22, 2012

by Lowtax

Doggles posted:

Neelix: Egads, my leeola root is ruined! But what if I were to replicate food and disguise it as my own cooking?

La Forge: It is possible.

Troi: We could make an entirely new food.

Lwaxana Troi: What's in it for me?

Worf: I am curious, Wos. You could have your name on the new foods.

Lwaxana Troi: No!

Worf: Your name?

Lwaxana Troi: No. My name's Lwaxana, and I won't allow anyone else's name to be in a food I make.

Worf: Then you'll eat my food. [He hands her the food, and she eats it]

Lwaxana Troi: No.

(The replicator explodes. Riker and

Lmao :pwn:

Palpek
Dec 27, 2008


Do you feel it, Zach?
My coffee warned me about it.


The serial killer's modus operandi is as follows:

A stranger enters a home with the intention of murdering a woman.

The stranger hides in the bathroom of the home.

The bathroom is locked and the man kills the women he comes into contact with before they are able to escape.

The stranger continues to search for the remaining women.

The Stranger eventually finds the women he is looking for.

The Stranger kills them and then begins the process of making their bodies into weapons and using their heads to set off bombs throughout the city.

The stranger detonates the explosives.

The Stranger has killed over 30 women since 1997, some of whom were found dead in their homes.

In 2007, a video game called Murder in Resonance was released. The game was meant to be an homage to the Stranger.

:stonk:

Rutibex
Sep 9, 2001

by Fluffdaddy
Neelix: Egads, my leeola root is ruined! But what if I were to replicate food and disguise it as my own cooking? Would that work?

O'Brien: It should, but it would just make it easier for us to discover and kill you. We wouldn't need to do anything.

O'Brien: What if we were all part of a group that killed our host to prove that we could eat them? Would that work?

Odo: I'm not an expert in human food.

O'Brien: What if we were a group that ate and hid in the garbage, then left a trail of dead people in their wake?

Odo: I'm not an expert in human decomposition.

O'Brien: What if we were a group that buried our dead in abandoned places, in the woods or in old dumps?

Odo: I'm not an expert in human decomposition.

Odo: Maybe we're all just an evolutionary dead end, trying to reproduce and survive.

O'Brien: No, I think you're just wrong about one thing. We're not all that stupid.

[Worf's quarters]

Worf: Mister Bashir, I've been searching for the cure to the Klingon phaser malfunction, and it's been a pain to get the right formula. I think the Klingons should learn to make their own.

Bashir: I don't think they're ready for that.

(Worf is lying on his couch.)

Worf: I need your help.

Bashir: You know I can't do that.

Worf: You're the doctor. You can help me.

Bashir: You have the phaser.

(Worf starts looking at it and it goes off.)

Worf: What?!

Bashir: Your phaser's defective.

Worf: It's not defective!

Bashir: It should have been replaced months ago. It's malfunctioning.

Worf: I'm gonna send a team to fix it.

O'Brien: You're not sending your team?

Worf: I have an alternate plan.

(O'Brien and Data enter.)

O'Brien: Are you all right?

Worf: I'm fine. I think I just fell in a holodeck.

Data: I don't understand. How did you fall in the holodeck?

Worf: I was on an alternate reality. I can't remember anything I did on the reality where the Enterprise is destroyed. I think it was an experiment.

Data: No, not an experiment. A holodeck?

Worf: A computer program.

Worf and O'Brien

(Worf has been left in a holding cell for 2 years while O'Brien has been in a shuttlecraft for 2 years).

Worf: O'Brien, the Enterprise will arrive at your location at five hundred hours. O'Brien, we are not here to rescue you. O'Brien, if you do not return to your cell, I will be forced to terminate you. O'Brien, do not make me have to do this.

O'Brien: Yes sir, sir.

Worf: Your actions since your capture show an insubordination worthy of termination. Now go.

(Worf and O'Brien are sent out into the hangar bay. O'Brien is still crying.)

O'Brien: No! No!

Worf: It is not time to weep. Now, if you please, Commander.

(O'Brien is shot in the back by a Romulan.)

O'Brien: Doctor, save me!

Worf: Commander, this is the last time you will see your son.

(The Romulan gives Worf the Klingon hand signal and he is beamed away.)

Worf: (angrily) We should not have done this to him.

(Sisko enters)

Sisko: The Federation has no right to interfere in Romulan affairs.

Rutibex fucked around with this message at 01:23 on Nov 12, 2019

Palpek
Dec 27, 2008


Do you feel it, Zach?
My coffee warned me about it.


quote:

How to live a meaningful life:
1
) Understand your own inner self and know your own mind.
2) Have the courage to say no to people and things that do not serve you or your cause, even if they are tempting.
3) Don't be afraid to say no to friends, family, lovers, and lovers of lovers.
4) Don't let anyone tell you that you are doing something wrong, or that you are not really a man or a woman.
5) Remember that all people are different. Even your enemy will see you as different from the way you see yourself. It is very important that you know and understand yourself.
6) Have courage, be yourself, be brave, be true.
7) Be self-reliant.
8) Learn and practice all the martial arts you wish to learn.
9) Don't ever give up.
10) Learn how to make and use tools.
11) Don't underestimate your power.
Thank you AI

curlys gold
Jan 17, 2018

I’m playing with my OJ Simpson action figure. He has karate-chop action and can kick my head off. — Michael Jordan (@MichaelJordan) July 17, 2014

I’m playing with my OJ Simpson action figure. He has karate-chop action and can't seem to stop the fact that he can't get laid. And he's a white guy.

I’m playing with my OJ Simpson action figure. He has karate-chop action and can beat up my kids with his huge man hands. And, he's a robot so he can go on the road and pick up cars and drive them.

Phyzzle
Jan 26, 2008
The 10 Smoothest pickup lines you'll ever hear

1. "Hello, I'm the biggest douchebag in the world, and my girlfriend is a stripper."

2. "You know you can't control your pussy so why are you on birth control?"

3. "If you've never done heroin, you're missing out."

4. "I'm only interested in one thing and that's you."

5. "How do I get your attention without being a total rear end?"

6. "I have an entire cabinet of pills ready to go, and I can't wait to get your attention."

7. "You're a loser without a clue."

8. "If you're gonna play hard to get, I'm gonna play hard to live."

9. "I'm going to suck your dick

strange feelings re Daisy
Aug 2, 2000

Doggles posted:

Neelix: Egads, my leeola root is ruined! But what if I were to replicate food and disguise it as my own cooking?

La Forge: It is possible.

Troi: We could make an entirely new food.

Lwaxana Troi: What's in it for me?

Worf: I am curious, Wos. You could have your name on the new foods.

Lwaxana Troi: No!

Worf: Your name?

Lwaxana Troi: No. My name's Lwaxana, and I won't allow anyone else's name to be in a food I make.

Worf: Then you'll eat my food. [He hands her the food, and she eats it]

Lwaxana Troi: No.

(The replicator explodes. Riker and
lmao

strange feelings re Daisy
Aug 2, 2000

D&D Monster Manual entry for Applewhite: The Fox:

The Applewhite is a fox of great beauty and intelligence. He has three tails and a tail-less leg, which he uses to jump and dive from tree to tree. His natural abilities allow him to use the magic of his tails to fly, climb up and over cliffs, swim across rivers, and ride on whirlwinds. He is highly resistant to fire and water, can cast great spells and enchantments, and can communicate telepathically with any creature that he has a special relationship with. The Applewhite was given to his first master, the dwarven sorcerer Nodens, by a goddess of love and beauty named Dalia. As a gift to his first master, Nodens gave the Applewhite a tail to keep him company while he was learning magic. When the Applewhite came of age, he took the magic of his tail and used it to become the first wizard to ever master the three magic circles.

Bobcats
Aug 5, 2004
Oh
As I lit the candles and set down the menu, my tongue slowly and sensuously probed the edges of her delicious beefy taco meat while she softly moaned out the recipe. I was so excited that I nearly threw the taco in my mouth and my eyes watered a little when I remembered what I wanted to do. My mouth was filled with the smell of delicious taco meat, I could taste it on my tongue. I grabbed the taco shell with both hands and tried to force myself deeper in her soft and warm hole. The taco was still soft on my lips, but I was able to force it with all my strength into her. I tried to get in as far as I could, and with a slight tugging motion she pushed the shell in further, "Oh gently caress yes!" She moaned as she started to squirt and spurt her delicious taco meat all over her soft skin and into my mouth. She continued to ride the taco with her hand and eventually it





:discourse:

Bobcats
Aug 5, 2004
Oh
Holy poo poo this is literature



She had caught me naked with the Sears catalog, again, and I was already aching to rip her throat out, but I kept my hands to myself. I knew I shouldn't have, that I deserved it, and even though I had never been a fan of the Sears catalog, I knew it was the last thing I needed. Still, I couldn't help it, I couldn't help myself. I ripped open the catalog and read the details of the new mattress, including the fact that it would be made of a material that felt like silk to me. It was a material that I could wrap myself in and forget about my pain.

"You don't need to do that," she said.

"I'm already naked in my bed," I said. "This is me telling you that I'm not afraid."

I didn't realize until the last moment, but she was still standing at the foot of my bed. "We should have told you about it," she said.

Bobcats
Aug 5, 2004
Oh
Whenever I go to Goodwill I longingly look at the women’s section and size up the cashiers. I'm not sure if they'll ever look at me or what I'll do.


* * * * *


In the last twenty years, I have not been a model, nor a movie star. Instead, I have been an administrator for a health care nonprofit. My work is an essential part of my community. We serve all Americans, with an emphasis on the elderly, the homeless, and the disabled. I have met countless people through our services, and I would not be in this position without the help of my staff and volunteers. My goal is to provide opportunities for healthy adults, to help them to achieve their dreams, and to save them from themselves and their families.


In my spare time, I run a nonprofit. But I don't do anything like this

:bisonyes:

Bobcats
Aug 5, 2004
Oh
My neighbors have sex with the windows open, which is a questionable move in an eightplex (it's also the most expensive of the properties, at over $30,000 a month). But it's also a nice place for the dog.
But my neighbor is a good neighbor. She's always out in the yard, she cleans up after her pets, she's kind and very kind to her animals and to me.
So it seems the only thing I'm bad about is the way I'm treating the dogs. And that's why the neighborhood association took action.
The new neighbors have started an informal agreement with me. It's been about six weeks, and I've made lots of progress.
So it's been a little while since we had sex and I'm not sure if the dog-sex was consensual or not. But if it was,

poverty goat
Feb 15, 2004



Funky See Funky Do
Aug 20, 2013
STILL TRYING HARD
List of most humiliating sexual encounters.

1.
I tried to do it to her, I mean I'm sorry, I tried. She is a very strong person, and I was a very weak person.


2. She told me that her husband loved her and that he would do everything he could to please her. So I tried to make her happy, and I did all I could, but, well, I tried to please her, and I don't know what I was thinking.


3. She's a very good person, and she's a good friend.


4. I tried to do it to her, I mean, that's what I tried to do. She has a very tight vagina, and I am a very clumsy person.


5. I was at the bottom of a staircase, and she came upstairs.

Huge Lady Pleaser
Jun 17, 2005

hello how r u doing im just looking for ppl 2 chill wit relax go out n have funn if ur looking for da same thing hit me up
Nap Ghost
Question: How can I tell if I’m gay?
Answer: I guess the easiest way is to check out your gaydar. If your gaydar is like a fire-hose, it'll tell you all the things that other people don't. For example, if you are constantly asking a gay guy what his dick looks like, you are probably a gay guy. And that's not even getting into how often gay people get drunk. That's not my job here, though.
Question: What is "bromance"?
Answer: Bromance, by the way, is a phenomenon in which a gay man finds it hard to be in a relationship with another guy, but tries anyway. I think it's hard to explain, but if you want to know more, go on YouTube and watch some gay guys who are married to other guys, or read any gay romance novels that aren't porn novels. There's also a book called Bromance


Question: How can I tell if I’m gay?
Answer: If you know you're gay, you're gay. You might know that you're a guy but your dick might be a chick. That's why I said don't give a gently caress.
It's not hard to be a chick. I'm sure you've seen this movie: The Devil's Advocate . A guy is put in a cage and the devil takes an interest in him. He wants him to see the light so he tells the guy, "You're really loving good at this." After a few scenes, the devil gives the guy a big fat load. This dude's dick is a chick.
So is this a straight guy who's gay and that guy is a chick? No. But it's not a gay guy.
"The Devil's Advocate"
What if I say I'm gay?
Answer: Then you have no loving idea if you're gay or not.

Huge Lady Pleaser fucked around with this message at 06:53 on Nov 12, 2019

Gulzin
Jan 3, 2004
A little gnome hasn't hurt anybody

Bobcats posted:

As I lit the candles and set down the menu, my tongue slowly and sensuously probed the edges of her delicious beefy taco meat while she softly moaned out the recipe. I was so excited that I nearly threw the taco in my mouth and my eyes watered a little when I remembered what I wanted to do. My mouth was filled with the smell of delicious taco meat, I could taste it on my tongue. I grabbed the taco shell with both hands and tried to force myself deeper in her soft and warm hole. The taco was still soft on my lips, but I was able to force it with all my strength into her. I tried to get in as far as I could, and with a slight tugging motion she pushed the shell in further, "Oh gently caress yes!" She moaned as she started to squirt and spurt her delicious taco meat all over her soft skin and into my mouth. She continued to ride the taco with her hand and eventually it





:discourse:

As I lit the candles and set down the menu, my tongue slowly and sensuously probed the edges of her delicious beefy taco meat while she softly moaned out the recipe. I was so excited that I nearly threw the taco in my mouth and my eyes watered a little when I remembered what I wanted to do. My mouth was filled with the smell of delicious taco meat, I could taste it on my tongue. I grabbed the taco shell with both hands and tried to force myself deeper in her soft and warm hole. The taco was still soft on my lips, but I was able to force it with all my strength into her. I tried to get in as far as I could, and with a slight tugging motion she pushed the shell in further, "Oh gently caress yes!"
TLDR

I was so turned on from reading the recipe for her beefy taco meat, I almost threw the taco in my mouth, and I could taste the flavor of her

Stanky Bean
Dec 30, 2004

you know what they say... "if you can't beat them get really good at karate and kick their rear end." -Dirty Harry, Harry Potter (2001)

-Dirty Harry, Harry Potter (2001) -Laser Pistol, Terminator 3 (1991)

-Laser Pistol, Terminator 3 (1991) -Droid, Star Wars: The Phantom Menace (1999)

-Droid, Star Wars: The Phantom Menace (1999) -Sonic Boom (1991)

-Sonic Boom (1991) -Darth Vader, Star Wars: Episode I The Phantom Menace (1999)

-Darth Vader, Star Wars: Episode I The Phantom Menace (1999) -The Hulk, The Incredible Hulk (2008)

-The Hulk, The Incredible Hulk (2008) -Nova, Marvel Comics (1976)

nightwisher
Dec 24, 2004

quote:

I like big butts and I cannot lie, you other brothers can't deny that too!

I will take you and make you my own, my own little sister! My own little sister that will love me for who I am! My own little sister that will show me the love and respect that I deserve!

I like big butts, you don't even know, you have no idea...

I will be the only one with a dick, I will gently caress all of you as much as I want and when I am done I will leave you a big cock and your sister a big pussy.

It's not fair. It's not fair! You have no idea...

I want your tits and I want you to take my big dick.

Let's see who wants to come first, and that's me, I am going to come first! I can't wait!

I'm ready!

I'm a real loving woman! I've been training for my big

Yeah this AI is loving insane already, GG everyone.

barbecue at the folks
Jul 20, 2007


Poor AI, looked at the Internet and went insane.

Mr. Lobe
Feb 23, 2007

... Dry bones...


barbecue at the folks posted:

Poor AI, looked at the Internet and went insane.

it would have been unreasonable to expect any other outcome

Baller Time
Apr 22, 2014

by Azathoth
Alternate reality Scatmans:

quote:

I'm the Scatman
Ski-bi-dibby-dib yo-da-dub-dub, yo-da-dub-dub
Ski-bi-dibby-dib yo-da-dub-dub, yo-da-dub-du
b
Yo, da da da
Yoop, yo, da da da
I'm the Scatman
I don't like to stay up past nine
I'll never make the Sunday team
And if I do, you'll see
You're better off without me, I swear
I'll go to the graveyard at three
And bury a cat
I'm the Scatman
Ski-bi-dibby-dib yo-da-dub-dub, yo-da-dub-dub
Ski-bi-dibby-dib yo-da-dub

quote:

Ska-badabadabadoo-belidabbelydabbladabbladabblabab-belibabbelibabbelibabbelabbelo-doobelidoo
I'm the Scatman
, I'm here to take care of my sick family, I'm the guy who cleans your toilets, I'm your favorite son, I'm the guy who gives you your Christmas presents, I'm the guy who gets your kids in shape for school, I'm your baby daddy, I'm the guy who makes your mommy smile, I'm the guy who has a lot of friends, I'm the guy who is a good listener, I'm the guy who has great taste, I'm the guy who is loyal, I'm the guy you can count on, I'm the guy you don't want to mess with, I'm the guy who always puts you first, I'm the guy you want to be your best friend, I'm the guy you go home to

quote:

Yeah, I'm the Scatman
Dong dong dong, ding ding dong dong

The way you walk in the shower, the way you're sweating, it's the way you can't take your eyes off of me
What are you, some kind of pervert?
I'm a man who loves to suck my own cock
It's not like it doesn't happen with the other guys
It's a man's right, it's a man's prerogative
So it's a man's turn, and I'm here to take care of you
The way you walk in the shower, the way you're sweating, it's the way you can't take your eyes off of me
The way you're sweating, it's the way you can't take your eyes off of me
You're getting my cock so hard that you're dripping all over the

Sex Tragedy
Jan 28, 2007

father of three with an extra large butt
The president tweeted, "I love hentai! High Testosterone!" The White House's official website features the same image of the hentai character.

"This is not okay," tweeted Sen. Barbara Boxer, D-Calif. "We have a @POTUS who uses the pulpit of the presidency to incite violence against women and girls."

The White House also responded to questions about the tweet from a CNN reporter, saying the president's tweet was "not a comment on an actual event."

"It is a cartoon that we found online," said a White House spokeswoman.




The president tweeted, "I love hentai! High Testosterone!"

The tweet was quickly deleted by the president.

"I think that the president should be more concerned with what's going on in the real world, not on a social network," Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-S.C.) said, according to The Post and Courier.

[President Trump tweeted an anime-themed GIF. He'll never forget the response.]

President Trump has been an avid watcher of anime. He tweeted multiple anime-related jokes in 2016 — for instance, the time he posted a picture of himself and Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe and the words, "This should be a photo-op with respect to the nuclear menace represented by North Korea."

The tweets led a number of Twitter users to accuse the president of using the Japanese prime minister as a sex toy.

[Japanese prime minister to Trump: Don't call me 'daddy']

President Trump's tweets often feature the phrase

Sex Tragedy fucked around with this message at 11:29 on Nov 12, 2019

Kitchner
Nov 9, 2012

IT CAN'T BE BARGAINED WITH.
IT CAN'T BE REASONED WITH.
IT DOESN'T FEEL PITY, OR REMORSE, OR FEAR.
AND IT ABSOLUTELY WILL NOT STOP, EVER, UNTIL YOU ADMIT YOU'RE WRONG ABOUT WARHAMMER
Clapping Larry

quote:

In the end, humankind was actually destroyed by 『Vampire』 and『God』. The war between the two was an intense battle.

And thus, mankind was annihilated.

"I'm sorry, but I can't help it. I don't know what happened before the battle began, but the moment the Demon King appeared, the Demon King, or rather,『Vampire』 itself, began destroying the surroundings. Then, the Demon King used its trump card, the 『Devil's Breath』. In this very moment, I, who had been watching from the shadows, realized that I had been deceived."

That's not all, huh.

"I, who had been looking at a battle between humans, the Demon King, and the Devil's army, the destruction of all this scenery, and the disappearance of the world itself. The result was, a result I hadn't thought of."

"No way."

That's pretty metal.

Kitchner
Nov 9, 2012

IT CAN'T BE BARGAINED WITH.
IT CAN'T BE REASONED WITH.
IT DOESN'T FEEL PITY, OR REMORSE, OR FEAR.
AND IT ABSOLUTELY WILL NOT STOP, EVER, UNTIL YOU ADMIT YOU'RE WRONG ABOUT WARHAMMER
Clapping Larry
"Sir, Romulans are decloaking off the starboard bow!" yelled Worf. Picard iced the deck with his phaser, then returned fire, hitting Romulans in the hull. "You are engaging our ship. I will hold you in check until the battle is over." Worf looked confused, then smiled. "Sir, there are six of those ships, sir. They could destroy the Enterprise." Picard was furious, and ordered a course set for the nearest star.

At the same time, in sickbay, Beverly Crusher was running a scan on Data. "There's nothing out of the ordinary," she said. "He's just a little confused. I'd say he's had too much to drink." Picard and Worf were also in the same bed. Picard turned off the TV and put on his uniform. "The Klingons have opened a formal protest

Grand Prize Winner
Feb 19, 2007


Margaret Thatcher sat atop her throne of skulls, stroking her fingers over her cadaverous hands. In the background, a single, solitary candle burned. This was her kingdom, her prison, her prison of solitude.


She is the Queen of the Dead, the Lady of the Dark.


Lich Queen (Dwarf Queen), Lady of Death (Elf Queen), and Lady of the Crypts are all, like the previous two, named after the ancient, yet still very much alive, races of the world known as the Drow and the Vistani.


As you can see from the previous image, it's a little difficult to make out what exactly those three races have to do with the Lich Queen, but that's not really a big problem.


The Lich Queen's true identity is the ancient and powerful demoness Tiamat. Tiamat has been ruling over the world for centuries and her will still controls everything in existence.

Palpek
Dec 27, 2008


Do you feel it, Zach?
My coffee warned me about it.


Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like? Well here is how.

First of all let us see what is that. Well it's a little bit like a long flat piece of wood. But this is only on top of the base. What is on the top of the base? There's this little flat piece of wood. And then we need to take out that little bit of wood and see what is that? And it's just a little thing called a groove. So now we go back. You will see we can take out a little piece of wood and then we need to take a little piece of wood and then we need to make a little groove in that groove. And then we need to make a little hole in the end of that groove. And then we can go

Kitchner
Nov 9, 2012

IT CAN'T BE BARGAINED WITH.
IT CAN'T BE REASONED WITH.
IT DOESN'T FEEL PITY, OR REMORSE, OR FEAR.
AND IT ABSOLUTELY WILL NOT STOP, EVER, UNTIL YOU ADMIT YOU'RE WRONG ABOUT WARHAMMER
Clapping Larry
The Klingon ship opened fire. Picard turned to Riker and said  "Klingon".  Riker told him to shut up.
The Klingons fire stopped.
Data and Crusher came out of the command center. "What happened?" Data asked.
"A photon torpedo blew us up." Picard said. "It will be destroyed by the sensors."
"It would have killed the Enterprise and probably the entire crew if you hadn't gone to warp. We must have run into a planet." Data said.
"I did what I thought was right." Picard said. "So, how does it feel?"
"You have my undying respect for your decisions." Data said.
"So do I, sir." Riker said.
Picard and Data left the command center. 
In the turbolift, Data turned and said "You did the right thing, Sir."
"Thank you. It will be your duty to keep those same rules of combat in mind." Picard

Kitchner
Nov 9, 2012

IT CAN'T BE BARGAINED WITH.
IT CAN'T BE REASONED WITH.
IT DOESN'T FEEL PITY, OR REMORSE, OR FEAR.
AND IT ABSOLUTELY WILL NOT STOP, EVER, UNTIL YOU ADMIT YOU'RE WRONG ABOUT WARHAMMER
Clapping Larry
Apple has revealed its latest innovative product, the highly unusual iphone that will be sold with a built-in 3D printer that can print in a range of materials.

At its event in San Francisco this morning, Apple revealed the iPhone 4S, a 6.1-inch model with a 4-inch display, a camera, a battery and a new technology called iSight.

The new iPhone was announced at a keynote appearance from Steve Jobs, Apple's co-founder and former CEO, and was unveiled with an Apple TV, a computer, the iPod, iPad and a range of products and accessories.

The new iPhone is a bit thinner than the 4-inch model, but weighs about the same. The front is dominated by a 6.1-inch display, which the firm describes as its "most advanced" ever, giving it a much sharper image.

It will also be the first Apple phone to be sold with a built-in 3D printer.

Palpek
Dec 27, 2008


Do you feel it, Zach?
My coffee warned me about it.


List of worst pickup lines:
1. "I'm sorry I have to give you this"
2. "I love you so much"
3. "I miss you"
4. "Please don't leave me"
5. "What did I ever do to you?"
6. "I wish you were here"
7. "I'm sorry I broke you"
8. "I'm glad we've broken up"
9. "Can we just stay friends"
10. "I feel sorry for my bad"

Kitchner
Nov 9, 2012

IT CAN'T BE BARGAINED WITH.
IT CAN'T BE REASONED WITH.
IT DOESN'T FEEL PITY, OR REMORSE, OR FEAR.
AND IT ABSOLUTELY WILL NOT STOP, EVER, UNTIL YOU ADMIT YOU'RE WRONG ABOUT WARHAMMER
Clapping Larry
🍆 💦😜😜😜😜😜 pic.twitter.com/r8gXZWyJKp — 🍆 💦🍆 (@LilMissRightie) December 20, 2016

I'll be a girl in a dress. @realDonaldTrump is in my mind — 🍆💦🍆 (@LilMissRightie) December 20, 2016

I'm the most fabulous, I've got the most amazing hair. I'm a girl. I'm a girl in a dress. @realDonaldTrump is my man — 🍆💦🍆 (@LilMissRightie) December 20, 2016

Trump is now the most fabulous girl in the world. — 🍆💦🍆 (@LilMissRightie) December 20, 2016

Trump is not just the most fabulous girl in the world — she is the most fabulous girl in

hottubrhymemachine
May 24, 2006

Connie is death process
Lisa needs braces. I am also a bit of a plastic surgeon, so I did an assessment of her teeth and made the call to have her braces placed. I then made the call to get her new hair and make up done. The following day she went to the office for her appointments and I waited for her to come home. This was her first time having braces and she was anxious. On the drive home I made sure to keep an eye on her as she was feeling the pins and needles. She returned home and we had some time to ourselves. I took pictures, we watched some tv and just relaxed. I have only had her for a few weeks so I wanted to make sure everything was going well. She went into the bathroom and I gave her a nice, long massage. I was very careful with my massage and didn't want to hurt her. It was so nice knowing she was feeling the pins and needles.

poverty goat
Feb 15, 2004



quote:

List of humans with very small penises:
1. David and Victoria Beckham
2. Steve Jobs
3. Ben Stiller
4. Justin Bieber
5. George Lucas
6. Leonardo DiCaprio
7. John Lennon
8. George Costanza
9. Bill Gates
10. George Clooney
11. Brad Pitt
12. Michael Moore
13. Charlie Sheen
14. David Hasselhoff
15. James Cameron
16. Mark Hamill
17. Woody Allen
18. Michael Jackson
19. Kevin Costner
20. Will Smith
21. Tom Hanks
22. Arnold Schwarzenegger
23. George Clooney
24. Will Smith
25. Michael Jackson
26. James Franco
27. Brad Pitt
28. Arnold Schwarzenegger
29. David Beckham
30. Justin Bieber
31. Justin Bieber
32. Ben Stiller
33. Steve Jobs
34. Charlie Sheen
35. Arnold Schwarzenegger
36. Woody Allen

poverty goat fucked around with this message at 15:20 on Nov 12, 2019

ghost host
Apr 17, 2010

ain't got no cash
ain't go no style
Giant pussy lips are a sign of fertility. It means that a woman is ready to have children. The more big and round you make, the stronger the baby. A man has a very important role in a woman's life. It is he who will protect her. It is he who will provide for her. And it is he who will make her pregnant.

The Giant Pussy Lips:

The Giant Pussy lips are made up of several smaller lips that are tightly wrapped around a man's cock. If you look at a woman in the mirror or on the street, you will see that there are several Giant Pussy Lips in the shape of an X and it makes you wonder how the Giant Pussy lips have come to be.

They are basically lips, but they look a lot like a giant clitoris.

They are covered in a small band of fat. In some Asian cultures, these are called the Yoni Pussy Lips.

kalensc
Sep 10, 2003

Only Trust Your Respirator, kupo!
Art/Quote by: Rubby
Alone he entered, without a friend nor enemy. Should he have pondered the irony which had embraced his present situation much like glaze to a fresh doughnut? Before he could begin to have this thought commence, a clattering occurred.

The men who had been in the rear of the horsemen had come up in the rear of the enemy's column, and had drawn back from it; so that, inasmuch as they were now in their own ranks, they could see, as far as possible, the faces of the men they were facing; and when they saw the leader, they ran up to him.

"You are here," said they, "for the first time. You are alone, and without a friend or an enemy."

He took a quick look round, and then, in a loud voice, with a shout, addressed his troops, and shouted to them, "Fall in, men; for now I am alone. It is my turn to fight for my country."

poverty goat
Feb 15, 2004



How to overthrow the U.S. Government and establish a New World Order:
1. You must first understand who controls the U.S. Federal Reserve System. This secret society, created and run by the Rothschilds in the 1700s, is the central bank of the world.
2. To understand why you must understand that the Rothschilds are the Rothschilds. They have no relation to the British or to the French or to the Germans.
3. In order to overthrow the U.S. Government, a new American government must be created that will have no relationship with the government of the United States. That new government must be completely controlled by the secret society that controls the U.S. Federal Reserve System.
4. The new American government must be run by a council, like the one in Switzerland, which is a totally secret society and does not need to answer to the American people. It can be a completely secret society.

Cheesus
Oct 17, 2002

Let us retract the foreskin of ignorance and apply the wirebrush of enlightenment.
Yam Slacker
After Radiohead released their noted album "OK, Boomer", Thom Yorke's lyrics were re-written and changed several times until they were all but lost to us.

But the lyrics to "Lift" in particular were never re-written again by Yorke, and it is safe to assume that this song was never re-written after that.

The song was originally written on November 28th, 1987, but Radiohead's guitarist, Jonny Greenwood was not present to record it at the time and it was recorded with the band's backing musicians on December 3rd, 1987.

The lyrics, as is usual for Jonny Greenwood, are mostly written from the perspective of Thom Yorke, although Jonny also provides additional lyrics to explain certain concepts that he is unfamiliar with.

The main concept of the song is about what happens when one of the protagonist's (or protagonists?) goes into the city and the people in the city start acting very strange.

barbecue at the folks
Jul 20, 2007


There is more than one way to skin a cat. For example, it can be done by using a hammer and chisel. Another way is to take out the entire body and then shave off a small area at the back of the head. The second is to cut off the head, skin the body and skin the back of the head. It can also be done with a knife and some scissors. The last is to take out the entire body, except the skull, and then shave it off.

How old are you?

I am a 28-year-old single woman who works in the finance field. The only thing that is older than me is my computer.

What was the first film you saw that made you want to act?

My first film was "The Body Snatchers." The first one I saw was "The Exorcist."

When you're acting, do you keep a journal?

I write down everything that I do. I take pictures of

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Shrinkage
Oct 23, 2010

Cubone posted:

"Let's-a go," said Mario, wiping the cum from his lips. "I'm just going to sit here and watch. And I'm going to stay there until you-ah, I'm going to stop you. And then I'm going to come here and-ah, I'm going to make you come."

"Okay," said Bowser. "But before you do, there's one thing you need to do for me."

Mario knew this was going to be hard to do.

"No, Mario, I don't want this!" Mario said quickly. He didn't want to do anything to be so ungrateful to this monster.

"I know, Mario," said Bowser. "But I want to know what I have to do to have your approval."

"What?" Mario said.

"To be your personal servant," said Bowser, "you need to do my bidding."

"Bowser, I don't want to be your servant. I want to be your friend. I want to play with your

"Let's-a go," said Mario, wiping the cum from his lips. He looked at the man with a cocky smirk. "It-a all yours, Mario."

Mario smiled, and stepped into the man's waiting hand. "Go get it, Luigi," he said, before kissing him deeply.

Mario licked Mario Luigi's shaft, teasing the tip with his tongue, before slowly moving his tongue between Mario Luigi's balls and onto the shaft. He moved his hands under Mario Luigi's balls and began to finger Luigi's rear end, bringing him to orgasm in only a few moments.

Mario Luigi released a final moan as he felt his hot load shoot into Mario Mario's stomach. He moved the man's legs aside, allowing Mario to remove his pants and underwear, revealing Mario Luigi's throbbing cock.

Mario moved his hands back to Luigi's balls, and began to suck on them gently. He took a second to suck Mario Luigi's hard-on, then moved his tongue in

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