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Bust Rodd posted:I’m just mad we didn’t get a full-page explanation of how sex works with a human wiener and a loving cloaca. Is she cold blooded? Does she have to gently caress with a blindfold on so she doesn’t accidentally petrify him during climax? I think the gorgons at least on ravnica can just turn the stone gaze thing on and off at will so they're not like 'proper' medusa style gorgons.
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Nov 13, 2019 14:38
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NEETs hate chads. But really that's just because they're a subset of everyone. There's also the stupid incel energy of "those guys are soaking up all the sex" involved too.
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Nov 13, 2019 14:38
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the dumb magic book posted:Her feet were numb. CRAWWWWWLLLLLING IN MY SKIINNNNNNNN
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Nov 13, 2019 14:42
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They should have just gotten Lee Child to write these books by find-and-replacing Jack Reacher’s name with Gideon.
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Nov 13, 2019 14:46
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I'm pretty sure gorgons have the bits as humans
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Nov 13, 2019 14:53
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I'm pretty sure Vraska just has snake hair, I don't think she's a snake lady all over. Nobody tell Jace about the Orochi on Kamigawa though.
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Nov 13, 2019 14:53
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Kurtofan posted:I'm pretty sure gorgons have the bits as humans Why on earth is this a thing you are “pretty sure” about
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Nov 13, 2019 14:57
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MikeCrotch posted:I'm pretty sure Vraska just has snake hair, I don't think she's a snake lady all over. "Tamiyo," Jace inquired, "Vraska isn't doing it for me any more. I need to gently caress a real snake, and I was hoping you could help."
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Nov 13, 2019 14:57
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MikeCrotch posted:This would just be Fear and Loathing In Castle Embereth as he goes to report on the big tournament while hilariously hosed up on magic mushrooms
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Nov 13, 2019 14:59
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Paul Zuvella posted:Why on earth is this a thing you are “pretty sure” about The lore
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Nov 13, 2019 15:00
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Its in the extended universe
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Nov 13, 2019 15:01
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It’s kind of hard to tell from her cards. In some cards she has full on Voldemort face and grey green skin with scales and in some cards she’s just a very pretty human woman with snake-dreadlocks. That’s bullshit. You can’t be a snake lady with titties, and you can’t be a warm blooded human lady with snakes for hair. Gorgons are snake people, WotC, just tell me if snuggling Vraska is like spooning a damp towel or not, you idiots! (I’m hanging out with my snake right now, he’s only like 3 feet long but he loves to snuggle despite having cold blood. If you’ve ever had a really bad burn and you let your snake near it, they will coil up on the burned parts of your skin and cool it down, extremely helpful!)
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Nov 13, 2019 15:04
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Fantastic Foreskin fucked around with this message at 17:23 on Nov 13, 2019 |
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Nov 13, 2019 15:19
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^ ^ ^ Given WotC's... everything, over the past decade or so, I wouldn't be surprised if they intentionally hired a lovely writer who lacks any self-awareness as to the degree of his writing's shittiness.Bust Rodd posted:(I’m hanging out with my snake right now, he’s only like 3 feet long but he loves to snuggle despite having cold blood. If you’ve ever had a really bad burn and you let your snake near it, they will coil up on the burned parts of your skin and cool it down, extremely helpful!)  Gud snek!
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Nov 13, 2019 15:20
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wondering if ajani has a barbed penis or not...
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Nov 13, 2019 15:23
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little munchkin posted:wondering if ajani has a barbed penis or not... I'm at work but someone please link the elf vagina thread tia.
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Nov 13, 2019 15:28
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MikeCrotch posted:I'm pretty sure Vraska just has snake hair, I don't think she's a snake lady all over. hint hint: jace is loving those hair snakes too
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Nov 13, 2019 15:31
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little munchkin posted:wondering if ajani has a barbed penis or not... A Hero writes.
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Nov 13, 2019 15:34
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 so does Sarkhan just gently caress the dragon ladies on Tarkir and then is saddled with kids
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Nov 13, 2019 15:43
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Bust Rodd posted:It’s kind of hard to tell from her cards. In some cards she has full on Voldemort face and grey green skin with scales and in some cards she’s just a very pretty human woman with snake-dreadlocks. In popular mythology, gordons can be anywhere from humans with just snake hair/petrification abilities to half a step away from Nagas. Even the original Medusa myths warped her visage over time with the later Roman versions just making her a beauty who was cursed by Athena for having the gall of letting Poseidon rape her in an Athenian temple. >_>
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Nov 13, 2019 15:44
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No dragon sex on Tarkir, Sarkhan just jizzes dragons.
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Nov 13, 2019 15:44
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We were somewhere around Castle Locthwain on the edge of the swamp when the drugs began to take hold. I remember saying something like "I feel a bit lightheaded; maybe you should drive..." And suddenly there was a terrible roar all around us and the sky was full of what looked like bartizan bats, all swooping and screeching and diving around the enchanted carriage, which was going about a hundred miles an hour with the top down to Castle Embereth. And a voice was screaming: "Holy Jesus! What are these goddamn animals?"
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Nov 13, 2019 15:45
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ItBreathes posted:No dragon sex on Tarkir, Sarkhan just jizzes dragons. you jizz into the wind, now reap the dragon whirlwind
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Nov 13, 2019 15:51
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Tarkir just farts out dragons
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Nov 13, 2019 16:01
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The virgin dragonlords vs the chad khans
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Nov 13, 2019 16:03
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DAD LOST MY IPOD posted:We were somewhere around Castle Locthwain on the edge of the swamp when the drugs began to take hold. I remember saying something like "I feel a bit lightheaded; maybe you should drive..." And suddenly there was a terrible roar all around us and the sky was full of what looked like bartizan bats, all swooping and screeching and diving around the enchanted carriage, which was going about a hundred miles an hour with the top down to Castle Embereth. And a voice was screaming: "Holy Jesus! What are these goddamn animals?" 
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Nov 13, 2019 16:17
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I'm irritated that Orzhov contracts somehow keep Kaya from planeswalking off world but Jace was the living embodiment of the magic that holds Ravnica together and he could run around willy nilly.
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Nov 13, 2019 16:21
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Retromancer posted:I'm irritated that Orzhov contracts somehow keep Kaya from planeswalking off world but Jace was the living embodiment of the magic that holds Ravnica together and he could run around willy nilly. and also he fucks
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Nov 13, 2019 16:54
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fadam posted:They should have just gotten Lee Child to write these books by find-and-replacing Jack Reacher’s name with Gideon. Gideon would gently caress too much
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Nov 13, 2019 17:07
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ItBreathes posted:Sanderson has to be mad at WotC for something; nobody writes that poorly unintentionally, right? The sex poo poo being really off makes sense considering he's a Mormon who writes incredibly chaste books
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Nov 13, 2019 17:08
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"[Planeswalker] Fucks" would be a good spell cycle.
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Nov 13, 2019 17:12
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ItBreathes posted:Sanderson has to be mad at WotC for something; nobody writes that poorly unintentionally, right? It wasn't Sanderson who wrote it. Author of both the WAR novels was Greg Weisman.
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Nov 13, 2019 17:21
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Owlbear Camus posted:"[Planeswalker] Fucks" would be a good spell cycle. Only if we pick the most upsetting options possible. Karn Fucks.
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Nov 13, 2019 17:24
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FrozenPhoenix71 posted:It wasn't Sanderson who wrote it. Author of both the WAR novels was Greg Weisman. Noted and edited. I still can't believe someone would put those words on a page without trying to write the worst prose ever. Like Ral Zerak's lighting, the worst kind of electricity.
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Nov 13, 2019 17:25
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The Deleter posted:Only if we pick the most upsetting options possible. Finally, the return to Mirrodin-Phyrexia.
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Nov 13, 2019 17:27
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fadam posted:They should have just gotten Lee Child to write these books by find-and-replacing Jack Reacher’s name with Gideon.
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Nov 13, 2019 17:29
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Sanderson wrote a side story about Davriel that was set on innistrad, before the events of WAR, I don't think there was any loving in that one.
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Nov 13, 2019 17:29
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The Deleter posted:Only if we pick the most upsetting options possible. "Being silver-tongued" about to take on a whole new meeting.
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Nov 13, 2019 17:30
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Owlbear Camus posted:"[Planeswalker] Fucks" would be a good spell cycle.
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Nov 13, 2019 17:31
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The Deleter posted:Only if we pick the most upsetting options possible. Chose one or both: Tap Target Artifact, it does not untap during it's controllers next untap step. Tap Target Creature, it does not untap during it's controllers next untap step. If both modes target the same permanent, place it on the bottom of its controller's library. Then place a loyalty counter on each Karn planeswalker you control.
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Nov 13, 2019 17:33
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