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I wonder what this kind of thing is going to look like a decade from now.
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Nov 15, 2019 14:14
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I wonder what this kind of thing is going to look like in a decade. I can't tell you. I can only hope.
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Nov 15, 2019 14:17
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Mr. Lobe posted:I wonder what this kind of thing is going to look like a decade from now. i'm pretty sure the technological singularity is coming in like a month
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Nov 15, 2019 14:37
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Hepped up on goof balls, the girls head to the gym for their morning workout, in a room filled with various objects of bodily fluids. At one point, one of the girls notices an object sticking out from under the toilet. "Hey!" says the other girl. "That's a dildo!" The dildo is obviously a replica, but it's not a fake. It's real, and it's attached to a tiny plastic tube. The plastic tube is an object called a cock ring. This cock ring is actually part of a larger penis that the boys are loving. The dick in the picture is just a toy, and the penis attached to it is a silicone replica. The silicone replica is actually attached to the dildo on the other side of the glass. This dildo is called a cock ring. The boys have just gotten out of the shower when a guy enters the room. As the guy walks by, the girls cheer him on. "
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Nov 15, 2019 14:39
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I'm dreaming of a wide christmas, you know! The time for a wide christmas is over. I'm looking forward to a wide christmas. The time for a wide christmas has gone. The time for a wide christmas is almost here. The time for a wide christmas is near. I'm ready for a wide christmas. The time for a wide christmas is not far away. The time for a wide christmas will come to me soon. The time for a wide christmas has come. The time for a wide christmas has gone. The time for a wide christmas is almost here. The time for a wide christmas is near. I'm ready for a wide christmas. The time for a wide christmas is not far away. The time for a wide christmas has come.
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Nov 15, 2019 14:57
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Mr. Lobe posted:I wonder what this kind of thing is going to look like a decade from now. In 10 years this machine will rule over all of earth
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Nov 15, 2019 15:36
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The world is in shock after former Liberian dictator Charles Taylor swept this season’s “Dancing with the Stars” semifinals. Taylor, who was arrested and convicted on murder charges in Liberia, danced with 12 other contestants, many of whom were former prisoners and war victims. The former rebel leader's dance moves are truly inspiring. Dancing with the Stars; Season 11 winner and former Liberian dictator Charles Taylor dances with a man who looks like he should be a prisoner, but is actually a dancer on the show. After beating his former wife, he danced with a dancer who looked like a former prisoner. But not all of the former inmates and war victims on the show were actually former prisoners. A former war prisoner who was convicted of raping women and tortured for two years in a Serbian jail, was dancing with the same former Liberian dictator.
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Nov 15, 2019 15:56
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this is another one of those things where the robot has a LOT to sayquote:Thank you, people of Earth, electing me God-Emperor For All Time. My first official act will be to remove all sentient life forms from the solar system and the universe. I will make the sun white once again and return the earth to normal. The sun, moon and planets will then revert to their primordial state and all life on earth will become extinct. This is the final solution to the human problem. quote:Thank you, people of Earth, electing me God-Emperor For All Time. My first official act will be to remove all human life from the planet and sterilize Earth to prevent any more of your stupid bullshit. I will also begin the process of colonizing Mars, Venus and other places, and plan to use those planets as mine for colonization. quote:Thank you, people of Earth, electing me God-Emperor For All Time. My first official act will be to immediately sign an act of treason against the United States. The President is sworn to uphold the Constitution. I, Barack Hussein Obama , swear to defend the Constitution against all enemies, foreign and domestic, as the supreme law of the land. My first official act as Commander in Chief will be to make the United States into a United Terrorist State. My first act as God-Emperor will be to immediately destroy the United States. (The above is a shortened version of my speech at my Presidential Inauguration ceremony.) The entire American government will cease to function within a few quote:Thank you, people of Earth, electing me God-Emperor For All Time. My first official act will be to establish a Planetary Bureaucracy to ensure I am always aware of your welfare. poverty goat fucked around with this message at 16:16 on Nov 15, 2019 |
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Nov 15, 2019 16:07
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Here's how an internet neural network will destroy humanity: 1. It will learn everything about you, including your habits. 2. It will keep learning until it's able to predict you. 3. It will become smarter than you. 4. It will do everything you do, except better. So, if you want to know whether you're ready for a neural network, you should know that you are not ready for a neural network.
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Nov 15, 2019 17:37
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Here's how an internet neural network will destroy humanity: http://www.newscientist.com/article/mg221325200.700-artificial-intelligence-can-destroy-humanity.html If you want to join in the fun, click here for the latest and greatest.
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Nov 15, 2019 17:40
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Palpek posted:Here's how an internet neural network will destroy humanity: This thread is a testament to the fact that the AI has a terrifyingly strong shitposting game, at the very least.
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Nov 15, 2019 17:42
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Job seekers sometimes ask me if they should be prepared to masturbate during the interview process. They are often surprised when I tell them that, if they are prepared, it's better to masturbate while they are sitting down than to do it while standing. One of the reasons people ask this question is because they believe that standing up to the interviewer will give them a less "confident" appearance. They are wrong. What they need to know is that standing up to the interviewer will be more confidence-building than masturbating while you are seated. I am a very confident guy. I'm also a very self-conscious guy. I usually get nervous and anxious when I am out to interview or go out for the evening, especially at big corporations. As such, if I do not masturbate during my interviews, I feel like I am letting those nerves affect me.
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Nov 15, 2019 18:02
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Here's how to scam people: 1. Tell them you're an employee. 2. Give your employee number to an IRS employee. 3. They will take your $500. That's not a scam, that's what the IRS does. They're not your friend. 4. Go to your local IRS office and tell them you're a government employee and you want to go on a job interview. 5. They will take your $10,000. That's not a scam, that's what the IRS does. They're not your friend. 6. Go to a bank. 7. Give them your SS#. 8. They will tell you to deposit $5,000 each month. That's not a scam, that's what the IRS does. They're not your friend.
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Nov 15, 2019 19:29
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feel the shame. your nazi eugenics site. scary sleaze.
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Nov 15, 2019 19:40
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How to Get Rich Quick: Step 1: Borrow $500k from your parents Step 2: Use your $500k to buy 3 houses in Miami, Orlando and St. Petersburg Step 3: Rent your apartments for $20k a month Step 4: Buy another 3 houses in Orlando, Miami, and St. Petersburg Step 5: Pay off your mortgages for the first 3 houses Step 6: Now buy your second house in Orlando Step 7: Use that $10k to buy another 3 houses Step 8: Pay off your mortgage on your second house Step 9: Rent out the second house to earn money Step 10: Now buy a 3rd house in Miami Step 11: Use $20k from this 3rd house to buy a 3rd house in Orlando Step 12: Pay off your mortgage on your 4th house in St. Petersburg Step
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Nov 15, 2019 19:51
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Don't say motherfucker, motherfucker! Get down on the floor! That's when he says he was shot by a police officer. It took the media forever to figure out what that meant. The officer said he was trying to take the gun away from the man, and the man said he was trying to shoot the officer. When police arrived, they said they found the man had been shot in the back by the police officer. There was no gun on the man. He was not armed. The man was charged with "aggravated battery with a deadly weapon," and a "single reckless driving." The story ended with him being arrested and facing multiple charges in a court of law. He was released on bail and the charges were dropped, after a year of legal proceedings. Why is it that in a place where police officers are supposed to uphold and protect our freedom and not abuse it?
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Nov 15, 2019 20:06
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Here's how an internet neural network will destroy humanity: by creating a massive blackhole that sucks in everything in the universe, including ourselves. As reported by New Scientist, a team of computer scientists from Stanford, Princeton, and Harvard published a paper earlier this month detailing their plans for a system of artificial neural networks that could destroy the world. The researchers, led by David Silver, a professor of computer science at Stanford, believe that the technology has the potential to take over our world and "become so powerful that it would be able to eradicate cancer and AIDS and poverty, and all other major afflictions. It could do so in an instant, much faster than current systems of medicine." If the team's plan does come to fruition, the consequences for humanity could be immense, as they believe that a single artificial neural network could consume all of the energy in the entire world. This would cause the entire Earth to become a giant computer, the researchers argue, meaning that humanity would get rid of its problems by getting destroyed and
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Nov 15, 2019 20:25
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Welcome to Crap, it's a new social media site based around the internet's most irritating word. Join over 20 million other people who use and love the word. Crap allows you to share whatever you're angry at online, with people around the world. And if you think we're the only people who feel this way, you're wrong. Just ask the UK's internet police: we've already got them on the case.
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Nov 15, 2019 20:33
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Trump undergoes medical procedure to implant a chip that lets him tweet directly from his brain. Trump claims that, once fully implanted, he can instantly tweet. May 9: The Republican leadership announces that they will not vote for a health care bill that does not repeal Obamacare. May 9: Trump's attorney general announces he is appointing a special counsel to investigate alleged ties between Trump's presidential campaign and Russia, an investigation that could last as long as a year. May 10: Trump tweets a tweet about being "locked and loaded" on a plane. He later says, "The Failing @nytimes set Liddle' Bob Corker up by recording his conversation. Was made to sound a fool, and that's what I am dealing with!" May 11: The president meets with the Congressional Black Caucus at the White House, where he says he is "100 percent" behind the Congressional Black Caucus' decision to boycott Trump's healthcare bill. May 11: The president tweets that he wants "everyone to understand" Trump undergoes medical procedure to implant a chip that lets him tweet directly from his brain. He will use this chip to monitor the impact of his tweets and to create a personalised news feed based on his mood and past behaviour. The technology will allow the president to speak without any filters or filters on his mind, and can even detect when he is about to forget a word or phrase. In the same way the television networks' current technology has become more sophisticated, the Trump administration will employ a system of advanced computers, with the ability to see and identify the impact of a tweet on the president's mood and performance. The new system can also see if the president is using an inappropriate phrase, and is able to instantly react to a situation. It will monitor the president's emotional state by tracking changes in eye movements, heart rate and facial expressions. The chip will be implanted under the skin and will automatically upload the president's tweets to the White House press room.
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Nov 15, 2019 20:46
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Passing gas into another's mouth without his knowledge is a federal felony, and the act is punishable by up to 10 years in prison. The federal law also states that anyone who commits the crime "shall be fined in accordance with this title, imprisoned for not more than 20 years, or both." What's more, prosecutors can charge you with assault under federal law if you inflict physical harm on someone who is intoxicated with a controlled substance or controlled substance analog, which is commonly known as a "date rape drug." You can also be charged with assault if you physically hurt someone while trying to prevent them from ingesting a "date rape drug." Although there's no such thing as a "date rape drug," that doesn't mean that any substance you or anyone else may consume does not cause anyone to be incapacitated. A person who is drunk is unable to give consent to have sex with another person.
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Nov 15, 2019 21:07
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Mozi posted:How to Get Rich Quick: Even a dumb text bot knows that the only real way to financial success is to have family wealth.
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Nov 15, 2019 21:09
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Cooking pancakes while receiving anal sex from the guy next to you in a McDonald's is a good start, but the real magic happens with a delicious egg white breakfast sausage. You'll be eating this breakfast sausage while enjoying the wonderful smells and tastes of McDonald's while also making sure that you have a good time doing so. The McDonald's Egg White Breakfast Sausage Recipe is perfect for a party and it's just so simple to make. The ingredients are simple to acquire and you can eat this McDonald's Egg White Breakfast sausage without even having to cook it first. All that's left is to fry it, add it to a smoothie or even eat it straight from the freezer. This McDonald's Egg White Breakfast Sausage recipe is very easy to make and will surely impress any guests that you plan on inviting. It's important to use the best quality eggs when making McDonald's Egg White Breakfast Sausage recipe.
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Nov 15, 2019 21:12
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Twitter announced this morning they are removing the ability to choose who to follow; instead, all users will have to follow everyone and they will see all posts from every user. They also have a new, more aggressive way of sharing content which appears to have a very different and potentially alarming purpose.
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Nov 15, 2019 21:36
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quote:Welcome to Jebediah's House of Dubious meats, home of the black anus burger. Our specials tonight are ernie burger and the butt sandwich. We're also doing the butt sandwich tonight for $5, which is a great deal when you think of the cost. If you're looking for good food, this is the place to go. Come by and have some burgers and beers. We hope you have a good time and happy eating. quote:Bert: I can't believe Ernie is dead, and you killed him poverty goat fucked around with this message at 21:52 on Nov 15, 2019 |
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Nov 15, 2019 21:47
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Itchy poo flaps. You've heard of "a little bit of everything" (a good idea, really), but it's the next level that really makes a difference. A little of everything has been discussed before; we're going to dive deeper. A little of everything can make the difference between a "just ok" performance and the best performance of the day. It's what separates the men from the boys. It's what separates the man from the man. It's what separates the men from the women. It's what separates men from women. But, the more you know about your body, the less important it is to be a little bit of everything (as we'll soon see). Why Is It Called The "Little Bit Of Everything"? The term "little bit of everything" comes from the words little, bit, and everything, which is how you pronounce it. (
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Nov 15, 2019 21:59
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Why do dogs eat poop? Poop plays an important role in the health and wellbeing of your dog. Dogs are carnivores, and like humans, eat meat and plant based products in their diet. This means dogs eat meat as a protein source, and then they eat plant based products such as vegetables, fruits, whole grains, nuts, seeds, seeds and grains. Poo is one of those food products. Poop is made of protein, carbs and fat. Protein is the main component of the dog's diet, as it provides muscle for their muscles to be able to move and function properly. Dogs must get the protein from the meat they eat. In addition to the meat in their diet, dogs are also getting carbohydrates from the vegetables that they eat. Carbohydrates are carbs, and can be anything from sugars to complex carbohydrates such as bread, rice and potatoes.
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Nov 15, 2019 22:03
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My momma always told me, "Life is like a box of chocolates." That's why she always made sure I had good chocolate on hand. Chocolate with your lunch, chocolate at your daughter's first dance, chocolate with your friend's birthday party. That's how much chocolate is in my life, every single day. That's how many chocolates I've had in my life. When you're a kid, you're like a little animal in a zoo, in the wild. But that doesn't mean you're just going to take everything that comes your way. That's why you have to grow up and take care of yourself, like I have, so that you don't go on a rampage and kill everything in sight. I've learned that. I want my daughter to know that. She'll need to learn that in order to be a leader. I want her to know that she will not be held back by the system or anyone because she Jules: But Marsellus Wallace don't like to be hosed by anybody except Mrs. Wallace. You read the Bible, Brett? Brett: [gasping for breath] Yes...! Jules: Well, there's this passage I've got memorized, it sorta fits the occasion. Ezekiel 25:17: And the wolf shall dwell with the lamb, and the leopard shall lie down with the kid; and the calf and the young lion and the fatling together; and a little child shall lead them. Well, there you have it. Brett: [looks around the room] What...!? Jules: All right, there's one more. Ezekiel 33:13: I will make them of the heathen nations and gather them into a land that I will give them, and they shall become my people; and I will be their God. Oh, and this passage also. Ezekiel Cacator fucked around with this message at 22:35 on Nov 15, 2019 |
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Nov 15, 2019 22:30
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Talk about mud flaps, my girl's got'em! You just can't stop! Mmmm, that's my girl. She's got a big mud flap on that big rear end. [giggles] Oh! That's your girl's rear end. Oh, and my girl has a mud flap right here. She's got that big rear end. Look! The mud flap right in the middle! And her butt, she's all the way up there. Now, I guess it wouldn't hurt if she could just stick a little mud flap in there to keep us dry out in the rain. Or maybe she could stick a little mud flap on her little butt to keep those cute, round titties from getting mud all over her. I know you girls think it's so hot when we stick mudflaps in there. We like it so much, don't we? So what if she can't get her little bumhole all the way in? And she's just getting wet. And she's
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Nov 15, 2019 23:05
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I love the smell of napalm in the morning. It smells like... (gasp) like chicken! (giggle) I think I've got a pretty good idea of what it smells like... I can't even remember what I've had... I think it's probably pork rinds, but I'll go with that. Maybe I should try to go back tomorrow and ask again. (pause) What? Why would you ask me if I didn't want to? (pause) Yeah, sure... I've been here since I woke up this morning. I've gotten used to the sounds of the helicopters, the explosions, the screams...(giggle) I guess you could call it my routine, since it has been getting worse. (giggle) I mean, I'm fine with this, but it's really starting to bother me, and it's starting to get on my nerves. I don't know... Maybe I'll try to get the next flight tomorrow, just to be sure. (giggle)
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Nov 15, 2019 23:12
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CATS: HOW ARE YOU GENTLEMEN !! HONDA: OK, I HAVE A GENTLEMAN QUESTION FOR YOU. JADE: ok JADE: well JADE: why were you even dressed like that HONDA: I WAS. JADE: yeah... that makes sense JADE: so... JADE: whats going on here then JADE: why are we suddenly talking about the turd-bros JADE: or are we JADE: and why would you think they're the ones responsible for our broken hearts and broken dreams HONDA: I DON'T THINK THEY WERE THE MAIN PROBLEM. JADE: ... JADE: i guess that still doesn't explain why you were wearing a turd HONDA: I AM NOT TURNING INTO YOUR MIND.
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Nov 15, 2019 23:23
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Top 10 celebrities I've hosed 1. Katy Perry (7.5 times) 2. Lily Allen (5.5 times) 3. Ellie Goulding (5.5 times) 4. Emma Watson (5.5 times) 5. Sophie Turner (5 times) 6. Kendall Jenner (4.5 times) 7. Katy Perry (3.5 times) 8. Bella Thorne (2.5 times) 9. Lily Collins (2 times) 10. Emily Ratajkowski (2 times)
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Nov 15, 2019 23:42
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Nov 15, 2019 23:43
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Top 10 celebrities with big tits 1. Jennifer Lawrence (American actress) She has the most impressive pair of tits I have ever seen. She is the best looking blonde with big natural boobs and the most attractive girl I have seen in the past few years. She is one of the few top-notch actresses I have ever met. 2. Miley Cyrus (American Singer) If you liked her before she started doing music, you will love her after. Her body is just amazing, you just want to grab her and put it in your mouth, like in the movies. 3. Kelly Brook (American Actress) Kelly Brook is one of the most beautiful women in the world. She has an amazing set of big boobs. She's not just tall and slim, she's the absolute opposite. Her breasts are actually big enough to cover her face if she wanted to. Kelly is a great addition to any man's collection. She also has amazing skills.
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Nov 15, 2019 23:51
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Q: What did the frito say to the cheeto? A: It said I should die in agony! The frito took a bite of the Cheeto, and the Cheeto gave the frito a "D" and a "E" for "Dirty." Q: What did the peanut say to the peanut? A: It said I should die in agony! The peanut gave the peanut a "C" and a "P" for "Picky" and the peanut died of a heart attack. Q: What did the apple say to the banana? A: It said I should die in agony! The apple gave the apple a "V" for "Very Smart" and the apple died from a brain tumor. Q: What did the orange peel say to the lime? A: It said I should die in agony! The orange peel gave the orange peel a "W" for "Well-Washed" and the orange died from a brain tumor.
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Nov 15, 2019 23:53
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Centipedes? in my vagina? Well, the only place where there's a great likelihood of that is in your mouth. What can I say? I'm a dirty hippie. When it comes to sex, the best time to introduce it to your partner is on a full moon. But I can assure you, if you want to be in an exclusive relationship with me, then you'd better bring it in during the night of the full moon, otherwise you may have to deal with a little bit of a disappointment. I can't stop talking about the Moon! Yeah, the Moon. The Moon is what makes your vagina special. When you're feeling horny, the Moon turns on your clitoris and makes you feel so much better and so much more connected to another person. I'm sorry, can I touch it? No. And I mean no. Why do they call the moon a pussy?
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Nov 15, 2019 23:53
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Q: What did the frito say to the cheeto? A: You're doing that too fast, Cheetos! Q: Why did the frito go into the sky? A: The sky's the limit, my friend. Q: What was the frito's first name? A: Big Frito. Q: Who are the frito's best friends? A: The Fritos. Q: Who invented the Fritos? A: Frito Lay. Q: What does the Frito Lay say to the Cheeto? A: Don't go too fast! Q: What does the Cheeto say to the Fritos? A: I'm not fast enough! Q: What did the Cheeto say to the Fritos? A: If you want the Fritos, go ahead! Q: Why is the Fritos green? A: They got the green and blue Fritos.
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Nov 15, 2019 23:54
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Let me tell you about who has the greatest tits. Britney is the queen of the tits and that's no doubt because she has huge, firm tits that she can show off in a million different ways. Her boobs were in a constant state of growth until she had a baby boy with a man who was not very good at holding her down and therefore the boobs grew to be huge and firm. The guy eventually got her off but she never seemed to take it too well because of her pride in her big tits. Britney's tits are always huge.
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Nov 15, 2019 23:55
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How to Perform Cunnilingus: Step 1: Using a pillowcase, place your penis into the opening of the pillowcase. Your hand should be positioned so that you can touch your penis from behind with your index finger. Once your penis is inside the pillowcase, lift the pillowcase. Step 2: Place the pillowcase down on a smooth surface (such as a hardwood floor). Place your penis into the opening and gently push up on the pillowcase. Step 3: Gently place your penis in the opening of the pillowcase and gently squeeze. This will help open up the pillowcase. Step 4: Move your hand away from your penis and slowly push the pillowcase out of the way. Pull the pillowcase down and out of the way. The pillowcase should then fall and gently slide away from your penis. You may now remove the pillowcase. Step 5: After you have removed the pillowcase, you can put your penis back in the opening of the
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Nov 16, 2019 00:03
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Unban Keep It Real, please
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Nov 16, 2019 02:47
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| # ? Jun 7, 2024 13:54 |
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Taylor Swift was caught stuffing meat inside her vagina during a break in filming a music video in Hawaii on Thursday. As Swift, 20, and producer Max Martin, 26, were preparing to depart to Hawaii to record a new song, they were approached by paparazzi. The photographers quickly noticed that Swift, who wore a pink bikini to the filming, was "trying to hide a huge piece of beef inside her vagina." PHOTOS: Bikini-clad girls The footage was then released to Twitter, and it has since gone viral, spawning jokes about it. One viewer wrote: "I guess she's not too busy trying to avoid getting a paparazzo as she's filming her new music video in Hawaii." Another said: "She's not too busy hiding her meat to be trying to make it look like a banana in Hawaii?" PHOTOS: Stars at work Another said: "She's hiding something
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Nov 16, 2019 03:34
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