Where It All Began - Let's Read the Twilight Series

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Lord Zedd-Repulsa: Jul 21, 2007; Devour a good book.

The bit with Alice in this chapter scares me more than any of Edward's direct actions so far because I went in knowing he was terrible but nothing about her. And I thought it was okay to mostly like her

Do the rest of the decent Cullens get warped in this book too?

# ? Dec 9, 2019 12:58

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# ? May 23, 2024 23:06

RaspberrySea: Nov 29, 2004

I like how there's so little plot or tension in these books that I'm not sure if we're in the epilogue of the last book, or the new one has started.

# ? Dec 9, 2019 14:23

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

MorgaineDax posted:

I like how there's so little plot or tension in these books that I'm not sure if we're in the epilogue of the last book, or the new one has started.

It's really easy to forget that Bella is supposed to be getting hunted by some supposedly incredibly dangerous vampire that can threaten the Cullens and the Wolf Pack by herself. These books are mostly generic romance drama (with a splash of abuse and severe mental illness that the author seems really wary of acknowledging) that occasionally goes "Oh yeah, there was a bigger plot here that we forgot 6 chapters ago!"

# ? Dec 9, 2019 15:05

Victorkm: Nov 25, 2001

chitoryu12 posted:

It's really easy to forget that Bella is supposed to be getting hunted by some supposedly incredibly dangerous vampire that can threaten the Cullens and the Wolf Pack by herself. These books are mostly generic romance drama (with a splash of abuse and severe mental illness that the author seems really wary of acknowledging) that occasionally goes "Oh yeah, there was a bigger plot here that we forgot 6 chapters ago!"

Technically none of the wolves or vampires are afraid of Victoria, it's only Bella that is subjectively terrified that Victoria will kill one of her friends even though there's no chance, because she is mentally ill. The supernaturals are just worried that she will get past them to Bella or Charlie.

# ? Dec 9, 2019 15:22

Dawgstar: Jul 15, 2017

Lord Zedd-Repulsa posted:

The bit with Alice in this chapter scares me more than any of Edward's direct actions so far because I went in knowing he was terrible but nothing about her. And I thought it was okay to mostly like her

Yeah. 'So, Alice is supposed to be the manic pix - oh, wait, no, she's a sociopath.'

# ? Dec 9, 2019 15:28

Lemony: Jul 27, 2010; Now With Fresh Citrus Scent!

Victorkm posted:

Technically none of the wolves or vampires are afraid of Victoria, it's only Bella that is subjectively terrified that Victoria will kill one of her friends even though there's no chance, because she is mentally ill. The supernaturals are just worried that she will get past them to Bella or Charlie.

Yeah, I find it kind of funny how terrified Bella is that Victoria is going to kill one of the wolves or vampires. On the one hand you have the Cullen's, who effortlessly mulched Victoria's partner once they caught him. On the other hand you have the werewolves, magical killing machines who apparently are created with the sole purpose of murdering vampires. Somehow I think there isnt much to worry about from some lone bloodsucker. If nothing else, you'd think Bella would work this out from the way Victoria keeps sprinting away anytime they get anywhere close to her.

# ? Dec 9, 2019 16:00

Victorkm: Nov 25, 2001

Lemony posted:

Yeah, I find it kind of funny how terrified Bella is that Victoria is going to kill one of the wolves or vampires. On the one hand you have the Cullen's, who effortlessly mulched Victoria's partner once they caught him. On the other hand you have the werewolves, magical killing machines who apparently are created with the sole purpose of murdering vampires. Somehow I think there isnt much to worry about from some lone bloodsucker. If nothing else, you'd think Bella would work this out from the way Victoria keeps sprinting away anytime they get anywhere close to her.

Yeah. A single wolf might be in trouble against a single vampire or more than one, but 2 or more wolves and the vamps are hosed barring special powers. Hell, the only reason Victoria keeps getting away is she supposedly has her own self preservation power according to the fandom? Not sure that Meyer ever made it clear herself.

# ? Dec 9, 2019 17:02

RaspberrySea: Nov 29, 2004

Meyers is right up there with JK Rowling with overexplaining nonsense outside of the books to answer questions we didn't need answers about. Wizards wear robes so they can easily take dumps in the hallway! Vampires can blink because their venom also lubes up their eyes!

# ? Dec 9, 2019 17:40

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

Chapter 7: Unhappy Ending

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Rosalie hesitated in the doorway, her breathtaking face unsure.

Dammit we already made the joke about this starting like a porn, don't keep it going!

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�Of course,� I replied, my voice an octave high with surprise. �Come on in.�

I sat up, sliding to the end of the sofa to make room. My stomach twisted nervously as the one Cullen who did not like me moved silently to sit down in the open space. I tried to come up with a reason why she would want to see me, but my mind was a blank on that point.

�Do you mind talking to me for a few minutes?� she asked. �I didn�t wake you or anything, did I?� Her eyes shifted to the stripped bed and back to my couch.

�No, I was awake. Sure, we can talk.� I wondered if she could hear the alarm in my voice as clearly as I could.

She laughed lightly, and it sounded like a chorus of bells. �He so rarely leaves you alone,� she said. �I figured I�d better make the best of this opportunity.�

What did she want to say that couldn�t be said in front of Edward? My hands twisted and untwisted around the edge of the comforter.

This is getting way too much like a fanfic opening for my comfort.

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�Please don�t think I�m horribly interfering,� Rosalie said, her voice gentle and almost pleading. She folded her hands in her lap and looked down at them as she spoke. �I�m sure I�ve hurt your feelings enough in the past, and I don�t want to do that again.�

�Don�t worry about it, Rosalie. My feelings are great. What is it?�

She laughed again, sounding oddly embarrassed. �I�m going to try to tell you why I think you should stay human�why I would stay human if I were you.�

�Oh.�

She smiled at the shocked tone of my voice, and then she sighed. �Did Edward ever tell you what led to this?� she asked, gesturing to her glorious immortal body.

Christ, it's still going!

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I nodded slowly, suddenly somber. �He said it was close to what happened to me that time in Port Angeles, only no one was there to save you.� I shuddered at the memory.

�Is that really all he told you?� she asked.

�Yes,� I said, my voice blank with confusion. �Was there more?�

She looked up at me and smiled; it was a harsh, bitter�but still stunning�expression. �Yes,� she said. �There was more.�

I waited while she stared out the window. She seemed to be trying to calm herself.

�Would you like to hear my story, Bella? It doesn�t have a happy ending�but which of ours does? If we had happy endings, we�d all be under gravestones now.�

I nodded, though I was frightened by the edge in her voice.

I think I should point out that it's taken us until almost a quarter of the way through the third book for us to get Rose's story, and we still haven't gotten Jasper's. There's no reason she couldn't have cut some of the chaff from the first book to go into a little more detail there, especially since she had no plans to continue initially. If the original Twilight had been all there was, we would have only gotten full backstory for Emmett and Alice! Even Edward's own detailed backstory and how Carlisle found him didn't get revealed until the sequel.

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�I lived in a different world than you do, Bella. My human world was a much simpler place. It was nineteen thirty-three. I was eighteen, and I was beautiful. My life was perfect.�

She stared out the window at the silver clouds, her expression far away.

�My parents were thoroughly middle class. My father had a stable job in a bank, something I realize now that he was smug about�he saw his prosperity as a reward for talent and hard work, rather than acknowledging the luck involved. I took it all for granted then; in my home, it was as if the Great Depression was only a troublesome rumor. Of course I saw the poor people, the ones who weren�t as lucky. My father left me with the impression that they�d brought their troubles on themselves.

This is actually relatively accurate to the reality of the Great Depression. Despite jobs and wages being down, actual starvation wasn't really a thing. Even the poorest people who still had a job consumed more calories on average than is healthy for a modern person (albeit not quite enough for a manual labor job) and there were extensive social programs to keep the totally penniless fed. The only noticeable increase in mortality came via suicide.

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�It was my mother�s job to keep our house�and myself and my two younger brothers�in spotless order. It was clear that I was both her first priority and her favorite. I didn�t fully understand at the time, but I was always vaguely aware that my parents weren�t satisfied with what they had, even if it was so much more than most. They wanted more. They had social aspirations�social climbers, I suppose you could call them. My beauty was like a gift to them. They saw so much more potential in it than I did.

�They weren�t satisfied, but I was. I was thrilled to be me, to be Rosalie Hale. Pleased that men�s eyes watched me everywhere I went, from the year I turned twelve. Delighted that my girlfriends sighed with envy when they touched my hair. Happy that my mother was proud of me and that my father liked to buy me pretty dresses.

�I knew what I wanted out of life, and there didn�t seem to be any way that I wouldn�t get exactly what I wanted. I wanted to be loved, to be adored. I wanted to have a huge, flowery wedding, where everyone in town would watch me walk down the aisle on my father�s arm and think I was the most beautiful thing they�d ever seen. Admiration was like air to me, Bella. I was silly and shallow, but I was content.� She smiled, amused at her own evaluation.

She still sounds like she was more likable than Bella!

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�My parents� influence had been such that I also wanted the material things of life. I wanted a big house with elegant furnishings that someone else would clean and a modern kitchen that someone else would cook in. As I said, shallow. Young and very shallow. And I didn�t see any reason why I wouldn�t get these things.

�There were a few things I wanted that were more meaningful. One thing in particular. My very closest friend was a girl named Vera. She married young, just seventeen. She married a man my parents would never have considered for me�a carpenter. A year later she had a son, a beautiful little boy with dimples and curly black hair. It was the first time I�d ever felt truly jealous of anyone else in my entire life.�

She looked at me with unfathomable eyes. �It was a different time. I was the same age as you, but I was ready for it all. I yearned for my own little baby. I wanted my own house and a husband who would kiss me when he got home from work�just like Vera. Only I had a very different kind of house in mind.��

It was hard for me to imagine the world that Rosalie had known. Her story sounded more like a fairy tale than history to me. With a slight shock, I realized that this was very close to the world that Edward would have experienced when he was human, the world he had grown up in. I wondered�while Rosalie sat silent for a moment�if my world seemed as baffling to him as Rosalie�s did to me?

They still, you know, lived. Edward didn't spend his entire immortal life sitting in a coffin. Somehow everyone else is able to get along with the changing times but Edward has to keep speaking in his stilted faux-gentleman vocabulary and wax poetic on his condition like he's still a freshly turned vampire.

quote:

Rosalie sighed, and when she spoke again her voice was different, the wistfulness gone.

�In Rochester, there was one royal family�the Kings, ironically enough. Royce King owned the bank my father worked at, and nearly every other really profitable business in town. That�s how his son, Royce King the Second��her mouth twisted around the name, it came out through her teeth��saw me the first time. He was going to take over at the bank, and so he began overseeing the different positions. Two days later, my mother conveniently forgot to send my father�s lunch to work with him. I remember being confused when she insisted that I wear my white organza and roll my hair up just to run over to the bank.� Rosalie laughed without humor.

�I didn�t notice Royce watching me particularly. Everyone watched me. But that night the first of the roses came. Every night of our courtship, he sent a bouquet of roses to me. My room was always overflowing with them. It got to the point that I would smell like roses when I left the house. �Royce was handsome, too. He had lighter hair than I did, and pale blue eyes. He said my eyes were like violets, and then those started showing up alongside the roses.

�My parents approved�that�s putting it mildly. This was everything they�d dreamed of. And Royce seemed to be everything I�d dreamed of. The fairy tale prince, come to make me a princess. Everything I wanted, yet it was still no more than I expected. We were engaged before I�d known him for two months.

As usual, the film did this all in a flashback. Royce King II was played by British actor Jack Huston, who played creepy badass killer Richard Harrow in Boardwalk Empire and Judah Ben-Hur in the 2016 box office bomb.

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�We didn�t spend a great deal of time alone with each other. Royce told me he had many responsibilities at work, and, when we were together, he liked people to look at us, to see me on his arm. I liked that, too. There were lots of parties, dancing, and pretty dresses. When you were a King, every door was open for you, every red carpet rolled out to greet you.

�It wasn�t a long engagement. Plans went ahead for the most lavish wedding. It was going to be everything I�d ever wanted. I was completely happy. When I called at Vera�s, I no longer felt jealous. I pictured my fair-haired children playing on the huge lawns of the Kings� estate, and I pitied her.�

Rosalie broke off suddenly, clenching her teeth together. It pulled me out of her story, and I realized that the horror was not far off. There would be no happy ending, as she�d promised. I wondered if this was why she had so much more bitterness in her than the rest of them�because she�d been within reach of everything she�d wanted when her human life was cut short.

Wow, another flashback that sounds way more interesting than what's happening in the plot! Great!

quote:

�I was at Vera�s that night,� Rosalie whispered. Her face was smooth as marble, and as hard. �Her little Henry really was adorable, all smiles and dimples�he was just sitting up on his own. Vera walked me to the door as I was leaving, her baby in her arms and her husband at her side, his arm around her waist. He kissed her on the cheek when he thought I wasn�t looking. That bothered me. When Royce kissed me, it wasn�t quite the same�not so sweet somehow.� I shoved that thought aside. Royce was my prince. Someday, I would be queen.�

It was hard to tell in the moonlight, but it looked like her bone white face got paler.

�It was dark in the streets, the lamps already on. I hadn�t realized how late it was.� She continued to whisper almost inaudibly. �It was cold, too. Very cold for late April. The wedding was only a week away, and I was worrying about the weather as I hurried home�I can remember that clearly. I remember every detail about that night. I clung to it so hard� in the beginning. I thought of nothing else. And so I remember this, when so many pleasant memories have faded away completely.��

She sighed, and began whispering again. �Yes, I was worrying about the weather.� I didn�t want to have to move the wedding indoors.�

�I was a few streets from my house when I heard them. A cluster of men under a broken streetlamp, laughing too loud. Drunk. I wished I�d called my father to escort me home, but the way was so short, it seemed silly. And then he called my name.

��Rose!� he yelled, and the others laughed stupidly.

�I hadn�t realized the drunks were so well dressed. It was Royce and some of his friends, sons of other rich men.

��Here�s my Rose!� Royce shouted, laughing with them, sounding just as stupid. �You�re late. We�re cold, you�ve kept us waiting so long.��

Yep, it's also another flashback where Rose recites all of the dialogue as if she's writing a book. Imagine how awkward it would be to hear someone actually recount a story to you like this.

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�I�d never seen him drink before. A toast, now and then, at a party. He�d told me he didn�t like champagne. I hadn�t realized that he preferred something much stronger.

�He had a new friend�the friend of a friend, come up from Atlanta.

��What did I tell you, John,� Royce crowed, grabbing my arm and pulling me closer. �Isn�t she lovelier than all your Georgia peaches?�

�The man named John was dark-haired and suntanned. He looked me over like I was a horse he was buying.

��It�s hard to tell,� he drawled slowly. �She�s all covered up.�

�They laughed, Royce like the rest.

This formatting is really awkward to edit in.

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�Suddenly, Royce ripped my jacket from my shoulders�it was a gift from him�popping the brass buttons off. They scattered all over the street.

��Show him what you look like, Rose!� He laughed again and then he tore my hat out of my hair. The pins wrenched my hair from the roots, and I cried out in pain. They seemed to enjoy that�the sound of my pain.��

Rosalie looked at me suddenly, as if she�d forgotten I was there. I was sure my face was as white as hers. Unless it was green.

�I won�t make you listen to the rest,� she said quietly. �They left me in the street, still laughing as they stumbled away. They thought I was dead. They were teasing Royce that he would have to find a new bride. He laughed and said he�d have to learn some patience first.

Only a week away, too. If he just waited, he'd have legal protection because marital rape was still granted an exception!

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�I waited in the road to die. It was cold, though there was so much pain that I was surprised it bothered me. It started to snow, and I wondered why I wasn�t dying. I was impatient for death to come, to end the pain. It was taking so long.�

�Carlisle found me then. He�d smelled the blood, and come to investigate. I remember being vaguely irritated as he worked over me, trying to save my life. I�d never liked Dr. Cullen or his wife and her brother�as Edward pretended to be then. It had upset me that they were all more beautiful than I was, especially that the men were. But they didn�t mingle in society, so I�d only seen them once or twice.

If the "brother" cover sounds odd because you're picturing the actors, remember that in the books Esme and Carlisle were in their 20s when they were turned. Their current cover as parents would actually be completely implausible because all of them visibly look the same age!

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�I thought I�d died when he pulled me from the ground and ran with me�because of the speed�it felt like I was flying. I remembered being horrified that the pain didn�t stop.�

�Then I was in a bright room, and it was warm. I was slipping away, and I was grateful as the pain began to dull. But suddenly something sharp was cutting me, my throat, my wrists, my ankles. I screamed in shock, thinking he�d brought me there to hurt me more. Then fire started burning through me, and I didn�t care about anything else. I begged him to kill me. When Esme and Edward returned home, I begged them to kill me, too. Carlisle sat with me. He held my hand and said that he was so sorry, promising that it would end. He told me everything, and sometimes I listened. He told me what he was, what I was becoming. I didn�t believe him. He apologized each time I screamed.

�Edward wasn�t happy. I remember hearing them discuss me. I stopped screaming sometimes. It did no good to scream.

��What were you thinking, Carlisle?� Edward said. �Rosalie Hale?�� Rosalie imitated Edward�s irritated tone to perfection. �I didn�t like the way he said my name, like there was something wrong with me.

In addition to taking years off to become a serial killer, Edward has also just been a plain douche his entire life.

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��I couldn�t just let her die,� Carlisle said quietly. �It was too much�too horrible, too much waste.�

��I know,� Edward said, and I thought he sounded dismissive. It angered me. I didn�t know then that he really could see exactly what Carlisle had seen.

��It was too much waste. I couldn�t leave her,� Carlisle repeated in a whisper.

��Of course you couldn�t,� Esme agreed.

��People die all the time,� Edward reminded him in a hard voice. �Don�t you think she�s just a little recognizable, though? The Kings will have to put up a huge search�not that anyone suspects the fiend,� he growled.

I checked and this is only 2 years after Edward stopped killing people to feed his thirst.

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�It pleased me that they seemed to know that Royce was guilty.

�I didn�t realize that it was almost over�that I was getting stronger and that was why I was able to concentrate on what they were saying. The pain was beginning to fade from my fingertips.

��What are we going to do with her?� Edward said disgustedly�or that�s how it sounded to me, at least.

�Carlisle sighed. �That�s up to her, of course. She may want to go her own way.�

�I�d believed enough of what he�d told me that his words terrified me. I knew that my life was ended, and there was no going back for me. I couldn�t stand the thought of being alone.�

�The pain finally ended and they explained to me again what I was. This time I believed. I felt the thirst, my hard skin; I saw my brilliant red eyes.

�Shallow as I was, I felt better when I saw my reflection in the mirror the first time. Despite the eyes, I was the most beautiful thing I�d ever seen.� She laughed at herself for a moment. �It took some time before I began to blame the beauty for what had happened to me�for me to see the curse of it. To wish that I had been� well, not ugly, but normal. Like Vera. So I could have been allowed to marry someone who loved me, and have pretty babies. That�s what I�d really wanted, all along. It still doesn�t seem like too much to have asked for.�

She was thoughtful for a moment, and I wondered if she�d forgotten my presence again. But then she smiled at me, her expression suddenly triumphant.

�You know, my record is almost as clean as Carlisle�s,� she told me. �Better than Esme. A thousand times better than Edward. I�ve never tasted human blood,� she announced proudly.

"Edward's one of the greatest mass murderers in American history!"

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She understood my puzzled expression as I wondered why her record was only almost as clean.

�I did murder five humans,� she told me in a complacent tone. �If you can really call them human. But I was very careful not to spill their blood�I knew I wouldn�t be able to resist that, and I didn�t want any part of them in me, you see.

�I saved Royce for last. I hoped that he would hear of his friends� deaths and understand, know what was coming for him. I hoped the fear would make the end worse for him. I think it worked. He was hiding inside a windowless room behind a door as thick as a bank vault�s, guarded outside by armed men, when I caught up with him. Oops�seven murders,� she corrected herself. �I forgot about his guards. They only took a second.�

�I was overly theatrical. It was kind of childish, really. I wore a wedding dress I�d stolen for the occasion. He screamed when he saw me. He screamed a lot that night. Saving him for last was a good idea�it made it easier for me to control myself, to make it slower��

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4AAtXhl075E

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She broke off suddenly, and she glanced down at me. �I�m sorry,� she said in a chagrined voice. �I�m frightening you, aren�t I?�

�I�m fine,� I lied.

�I got carried away.�

�Don�t worry about it.�

�I�m surprised Edward didn�t tell you more about it.�

�He doesn�t like to tell other people�s stories�he feels like he�s betraying confidences, because he hears so much more than just the parts they mean for him to hear.�

She smiled and shook her head. �I probably ought to give him more credit. He�s really quite decent, isn�t he?�

�I think so.�

You're literally talking to his kidnapping victim.

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�I can tell.� Then she sighed. �I haven�t been fair to you, either, Bella. Did he tell you why? Or was that too confidential?�

�He said it was because I was human. He said it was harder for you to have someone on the outside who knew.�

Rosalie�s musical laughter interrupted me. �Now I really feel guilty. He�s been much, much kinder to me than I deserve.� She seemed warmer as she laughed, like she�d let down some guard that had never been absent in my presence before. �What a liar that boy is.� She laughed again.

�He was lying?� I asked, suddenly wary.

�Well, that�s probably putting it too strongly. He just didn�t tell you the whole story. What he told you was true, even truer now than it was before. However, at the time�� She broke off, chuckling nervously. �It�s embarrassing. You see, at first, I was mostly jealous because he wanted you and not me.�

Her words sent a thrill of fear through me. Sitting there in the silver light, she was more beautiful than anything else I could imagine. I could not compete with Rosalie.

�But you love Emmett�,� I mumbled.

She shook her head back and forth, amused. �I don�t want Edward that way, Bella. I never did�I love him as a brother, but he�s irritated me from the first moment I heard him speak. You have to understand, though� I was so used to people wanting me. And Edward wasn�t the least bit interested. It frustrated me, even offended me in the beginning. But he never wanted anyone, so it didn�t bother me long. Even when we first met Tanya�s clan in Denali�all those females!�Edward never showed the slightest preference. And then he met you.� She looked at me with confused eyes. I was only half paying attention. I was thinking about Edward and Tanya and all those females, and my lips pressed together in a hard line.

�Not that you aren�t pretty, Bella,� she said, misreading my expression. �But it just meant that he found you more attractive than me. I�m vain enough that I minded.�

I promise the Denali clan will become important in the plot. Eventually. After having them referenced a dozen or two times first.

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�But you said �at first.� That doesn�t still� bother you, does it? I mean, we both know you�re the most beautiful person on the planet.�

I laughed at having to say the words�it was so obvious. How odd that Rosalie should need such reassurances.

Rosalie laughed, too. �Thanks, Bella. And no, it doesn�t really bother me anymore. Edward has always been a little strange.� She laughed again.

"He's a murderous psychopath!"

quote:

�But you still don�t like me,� I whispered.

Her smile faded. �I�m sorry about that.�

We sat in silence for a moment, and she didn�t seem inclined to go on.

�Would you tell me why? Did I do something�?� Was she angry that I�d put her family�her Emmett�in danger? Time and time again. James, and now Victoria�

�No, you haven�t done anything,� she murmured. �Not yet.�

I stared at her, perplexed.

�Don�t you see, Bella?� Her voice was suddenly more passionate than before, even while she�d told her unhappy story. �You already have everything. You have a whole life ahead of you�everything I want. And you�re going to just throw it away. Can�t you see that I�d trade everything I have to be you? You have the choice that I didn�t have, and you�re choosing wrong!�

It's easy to sympathize with every other character over Bella, but Rosalie has the best reason of anyone. Of course we need Bella to get everything she wants, so Rosalie will inevitably have no choice but to accept Bella's choice to become a vampire and abandon all of her family and friends for a whiny douchebag who keeps abusing her "out of love".

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I flinched back from her fierce expression. I realized my mouth had fallen open and I snapped it shut.

She stared at me for a long moment and, slowly, the fervor in her eyes dimmed. Abruptly, she was abashed.

�And I was so sure that I could do this calmly.� She shook her head, seeming a little dazed by the flood of emotion. �It�s just that it�s harder now than it was then, when it was no more than vanity.�

She stared at the moon in silence. It was a few moments before I was brave enough to break into her reverie.

�Would you like me better if I chose to stay human?�

She turned back to me, her lips twitching into a hint of a smile. �Maybe.�

�You did get some of your happy ending, though,� I reminded her. �You got Emmett.�

�I got half.� She grinned. �You know that I saved Emmett from a bear that was mauling him, and carried him home to Carlisle. But can you guess why I stopped the bear from eating him?�

I shook my head.

�With the dark curls� the dimples that showed even while he was grimacing in pain� the strange innocence that seemed so out of place on a grown man�s face� he reminded me of Vera�s little Henry. I didn�t want him to die�so much that, even though I hated this life, I was selfish enough to ask Carlisle to change him for me.

�I got luckier than I deserved. Emmett is everything I would have asked for if I�d known myself well enough to know what to ask for. He�s exactly the kind of person someone like me needs. And, oddly enough, he needs me, too. That part worked out better than I could have hoped. But there will never be more than the two of us. And I�ll never sit on a porch somewhere, with him gray-haired by my side, surrounded by our grandchildren."

Rose has probably suffered from her transformation more than anyone. Edward, Emmett, and Alice didn't have much of anything they were looking forward to in life. Esme was suicidal. Carlisle chose to use his powers and immortality for the good of mankind, legitimate good rather than something like trying to rule over everyone. We haven't gotten to Jasper yet but he was also very young and didn't have many connections to his human life to lose. As selfish as Rose was in her youth, she had legitimate dreams for a future and wants to be dead rather than live without them. Bella is basically taking all of her trauma and throwing it back in her face out of immature selfishness.

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Her smile was kind now. �That sounds quite bizarre to you, doesn�t it? In some ways, you are much more mature than I was at eighteen. But in other ways� there are many things you�ve probably never thought about seriously. You�re too young to know what you�ll want in ten years, fifteen years�and too young to give it all up without thinking it through. You don�t want to be rash about permanent things, Bella.� She patted my head, but the gesture didn�t feel condescending.

I sighed.

�Just think about it a little. Once it�s done, it can�t be undone. Esme�s made do with us as substitutes� and Alice doesn�t remember anything human so she can�t miss it.� You will remember, though. It�s a lot to give up.�

But more to get in return, I didn�t say aloud. �Thanks, Rosalie. It�s nice to understand� to know you better.�

And even after all of that, Bella still can't help but be a selfish little poo poo in her head.

quote:

�I apologize for being such a monster.� She grinned. �I�ll try to behave myself from now on.�

I grinned back at her. We weren�t friends yet, but I was pretty sure she wouldn�t always hate me so much.

�I�ll let you sleep now.� Rosalie�s eyes flickered to the bed, and her lips twitched. �I know you�re frustrated that he�s keeping you locked up like this, but don�t give him too bad a time when he gets back. He loves you more than you know. It terrifies him to be away from you.� She got up silently and ghosted to the door. �Goodnight, Bella,� she whispered as she shut it behind herself.

�Goodnight, Rosalie,� I murmured a second too late.

It took me a long time to fall asleep after that.

When I did sleep, I had a nightmare. I was crawling across the dark, cold stones of an unfamiliar street, under lightly falling snow, leaving a trail of blood smeared behind me. A shadowy angel in a long white dress watched my progress with resentful eyes.

If I never read another dream sequence from Stephenie Meyer, it will have been too long.

quote:

The next morning, Alice drove me to school while I stared grumpily out the windshield. I was feeling sleep-deprived, and it made the irritation of my imprisonment that much stronger.

�Tonight we�ll go out to Olympia or something,� she promised. �That would be fun, right?�

�Why don�t you just lock me in the basement,� I suggested, �and forget the sugar coating?�

Alice frowned. �He�s going to take the Porsche back. I�m not doing a very good job. You�re supposed to be having fun.�

Is this what "character assassination" feels like? Where did the Alice we all like go? She's been replaced by this psychopathic, childish automaton.

quote:

�It�s not your fault,� I muttered. I couldn�t believe I actually felt guilty. �I�ll see you at lunch.�

I trudged off to English. Without Edward, the day was guaranteed to be unbearable. I sulked through my first class, well aware that my attitude wasn�t helping anything.

When the bell rang, I got up without much enthusiasm. Mike was there at the door, holding it open for me.

�Edward hiking this weekend?� he asked sociably as we walked out into the light rain.

�Yeah.�

�You want to do something tonight?�

How could he still sound hopeful?

�Can�t. I�ve got a slumber party,� I grumbled. He gave me a strange look as he processed my mood.

�Who are you��

Mike�s question was cut short as a loud, growling roar erupted from behind us in the parking lot. Everyone on the sidewalk turned to look, staring in disbelief as the noisy black motorcycle screeched to a stop on the edge of the concrete, the engine still snarling. Jacob waved to me urgently.

�Run, Bella!� he yelled over the engine�s roar.

Jacob may also be a little poo poo, but I will give him credit for this.

quote:

I was frozen for a second before I understood.

I looked at Mike quickly. I knew I only had seconds.

How far would Alice go to restrain me in public?

�I got really sick and went home, okay?� I said to Mike, my voice filled with sudden excitement.

�Fine,� he muttered.

I pecked Mike swiftly on the cheek. �Thanks, Mike. I owe you one!� I called as I sprinted away.

Jacob revved his engine, grinning. I jumped on the back of his seat, wrapping my arms tightly around his waist.

I caught sight of Alice, frozen at the edge of the cafeteria, her eyes sparking with fury, her lip curled back over her teeth. I shot her one pleading glance.

Then we were racing across the blacktop so fast that my stomach got lost somewhere behind me.

This feels a lot less innocent than Meyer seems to want it to be and a lot more like a literal rescue from a kidnapper. If you have to wonder if you're going to get physically restrained from leaving in public, you're not among friends!

quote:

�Hold on,� Jacob shouted.

I hid my face in his back as he sped down the highway. I knew he would slow down when we hit the Quileute border. I just had to hold on till then. I prayed silently and fervently that Alice wouldn�t follow, and that Charlie wouldn�t happen to see me.�

It was obvious when we had reached the safe zone. The bike slowed, and Jacob straightened up and howled with laughter. I opened my eyes.

�We made it,� he shouted. �Not bad for a prison break, eh?�

�Good thinking, Jake.�

�I remembered what you said about the psychic leech not being about to predict what I�m going to do. I�m glad you didn�t think of this�she wouldn�t have let you go to school.�

*shudders*

quote:

�That�s why I didn�t consider it.�

He laughed triumphantly. �What do you want to do today?�

�Anything!� I laughed back. It felt great to be free.

# ? Dec 9, 2019 18:27

Midjack: Dec 24, 2007

Rosalie is the main character of I Spit On Your Grave. Hmm. Yes, good choice there Steph.

# ? Dec 9, 2019 19:59

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

# ? Dec 9, 2019 20:39

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

Chapter 8: Temper

Uh oh.

quote:

We ended up on the beach again, wandering aimlessly. Jacob was still full of himself for engineering my escape.

�Do you think they�ll come looking for you?� he asked, sounding hopeful.

�No.� I was certain about that. �They�re going to be furious with me tonight, though.�

He picked up a rock and chucked it into the waves. �Don�t go back, then,� he suggested again.

�Charlie would love that,� I said sarcastically.

�I bet he wouldn�t mind.�

I didn�t answer. Jacob was probably right, and that made me grind my teeth together. Charlie�s blatant preference for my Quileute friends was so unfair. I wondered if he would feel the same if he knew the choice was really between vampires and werewolves.

He'd probably pick whoever was the least openly creepy.

quote:

�So what�s the latest pack scandal?� I asked lightly.

Jacob skidded to a halt, and he stared down at me with shocked eyes.

�What? That was a joke.�

�Oh.� He looked away.

I waited for him to start walking again, but he seemed lost in thought.

�Is there a scandal?� I wondered.

Jacob chuckled once. �I forget what it�s like, not having everyone know everything all the time. Having a quiet, private place inside my head.�

WOW CAN YOU SEE THE CONNECTION TO EDWARD AND BELLA'S RELATIONSHIP

quote:

We walked along the stony beach quietly for a few minutes.

�So what is it?� I finally asked. �That everyone in your head already knows?�

He hesitated for a moment, as if he weren�t sure how much he was going to tell me. Then he sighed and said, �Quil imprinted. That�s three now. The rest of us are starting to get worried. Maybe it�s more common than the stories say.�� He frowned, and then turned to stare at me. He gazed into my eyes without speaking, his eyebrows furrowed in concentration.

�What are you staring at?� I asked, feeling self-conscious.

He sighed. �Nothing.�

Literally trying to beam imprinting thoughts into his crush's head.

quote:

Jacob started walking again. Without seeming to think about it, he reached out and took my hand. We paced silently across the rocks. I thought of how we must look walking hand and hand down the beach�like a couple, certainly�and wondered if I should object. But this was the way it had always been with Jacob.� No reason to get worked up about it now.

�Why is Quil�s imprinting such a scandal?� I asked when it didn�t look like he was going to go on. �Is it because he�s the newest one?�

�That doesn�t have anything to do with it.�

�Then what�s the problem?�

�It�s another one of those legend things. I wonder when we�re going to stop being surprised that they�re all true?� he muttered to himself.

�Are you going to tell me? Or do I have to guess?�

�You�d never get it right. See, Quil hasn�t been hanging out with us, you know, until just recently. So he hadn�t been around Emily�s place much.�

�Quil imprinted on Emily, too?� I gasped.

�No! I told you not to guess. Emily had her two nieces down for a visit� and Quil met Claire.�

This is gonna go to a place.

quote:

He didn�t continue. I thought about that for a moment.

�Emily doesn�t want her niece with a werewolf? That�s a little hypocritical,� I said.

But I could understand why she of all people might feel that way. I thought again of the long scars that marred her face and extended all the way down her right arm. Sam had lost control just once when he was standing too close to her. Once was all it took.� I�d seen the pain in Sam�s eyes when he looked at what he�d done to Emily. I could understand why Emily might want to protect her niece from that.

�Would you please stop guessing? You�re way off. Emily doesn�t mind that part, it�s just, well, a little early.�

�What do you mean early?�

Jacob appraised me with narrowed eyes. �Try not to be judgmental, okay?�

I nodded cautiously.

�Claire is two,� Jacob told me.

Yep.

quote:

Rain started to fall. I blinked furiously as the drops pelted my face.

Jacob waited in silence. He wore no jacket, as usual; the rain left a spatter of dark spots on his black T-shirt, and dripped through his shaggy hair. His face was expressionless as he watched mine.

�Quil� imprinted� with a two-year-old?� I was finally able to ask.

�It happens.� Jacob shrugged. He bent to grab another rock and sent it flying out into the bay. �Or so the stories say.�

�But she�s a baby,� I protested.

He looked at me with dark amusement. �Quil�s not getting any older,� he reminded me, a bit of acid in his tone. �He�ll just have to be patient for a few decades.�

ew ew ew ew ew ew ew

quote:

�I� don�t know what to say.�

I was trying my hardest not to be critical, but, in truth, I was horrified. Until now, nothing about the werewolves had bothered me since the day I�d found out they weren�t committing the murders I�d suspected them of.

�You�re making judgments,� he accused. �I can see it on your face.�

I'm judging the writer!

quote:

�Sorry,� I muttered. �But it sounds really creepy.�

�It�s not like that; you�ve got it all wrong,� Jacob defended his friend, suddenly vehement. �I�ve seen what it�s like, through his eyes. There�s nothing romantic about it at all, not for Quil, not now.� He took a deep breath, frustrated. �It�s so hard to describe. It�s not like love at first sight, really. It�s more like� gravity moves. When you see her, suddenly it�s not the earth holding you here anymore. She does. And nothing matters more than her. And you would do anything for her, be anything for her.� You become whatever she needs you to be, whether that�s a protector, or a lover, or a friend, or a brother.

�Quil will be the best, kindest big brother any kid ever had. There isn�t a toddler on the planet that will be more carefully looked after than that little girl will be. And then, when she�s older and needs a friend, he�ll be more understanding, trustworthy, and reliable than anyone else she knows. And then, when she�s grown up, they�ll be as happy as Emily and Sam.� A strange, bitter edge sharpened his tone at the very end, when he spoke of Sam.

You're not making it sound any less weird!

quote:

�Doesn�t Claire get a choice here?�

�Of course. But why wouldn�t she choose him, in the end? He�ll be her perfect match. Like he was designed for her alone.�

How does this book get worse? Every chapter it just gets worse.

quote:

We walked in silence for a moment, till I paused to toss a rock toward the ocean. It fell to the beach several meters short. Jacob laughed at me.

�We can�t all be freakishly strong,� I muttered.

He sighed.

�When do you think it will happen for you?� I asked quietly.

His answer was flat and immediate. �Never.�

�It�s not something you can control, is it?�

He was silent for a few minutes. Unconsciously, we both walked slower, barely moving at all.

�It�s not supposed to be,� he admitted. �But you have to see her�the one that�s supposedly meant for you.�

�And you think that if you haven�t seen her yet, then she�s not out there?� I asked skeptically. �Jacob, you haven�t really seen much of the world�less than me, even.�

�No, I haven�t,� he said in a low voice. He looked at my face with suddenly piercing eyes. �But I�ll never see anyone else, Bella. I only see you. Even when I close my eyes and try to see something else. Ask Quil or Embry. It drives them all crazy.�

Don't worry, I'm sure Meyer will find the best and least creepy way to get you taken care of by the end of this series!

quote:

I dropped my eyes to the rocks.

We weren�t walking anymore. The only sound was of the waves beating against the shore. I couldn�t hear the rain over their roar.

�Maybe I�d better go home,� I whispered.

�No!� he protested, surprised by this conclusion.

Thank you for telling me he was surprised by this conclusion. I never would have been able to figure anything out from context.

quote:

I looked up at him again, and his eyes were anxious now.

�You have the whole day off, right? The bloodsucker won�t be home yet.�

I glared at him.

�No offense intended,� he said quickly.

�Yes, I have the whole day. But, Jake��

He held up his hands. �Sorry,� he apologized. �I won�t be like that anymore. I�ll just be Jacob.�

I sighed. �But if that�s what you�re thinking��

�Don�t worry about me,� he insisted, smiling with deliberate cheer, too brightly. �I know what I�m doing. Just tell me if I�m upsetting you.�

�I don�t know.��

�C�mon, Bella. Let�s go back to the house and get our bikes. You�ve got to ride a motorcycle regularly to keep it in tune.�

�I really don�t think I�m allowed.�

�By who? Charlie or the blood�or him?�

�Both.�

Since she doesn't have a motorcycle license I'm pretty sure Charlie could actually legally bar her from riding it. Edward is just showing sensible precaution.

quote:

Jacob grinned my grin, and he was suddenly the Jacob I missed the most, sunny and warm.

I couldn�t help grinning back.

The rain softened, turned to mist.

�I won�t tell anyone,� he promised.

�Except every one of your friends.�

He shook his head soberly and raised his right hand. �I promise not to think about it.�

I laughed. �If I get hurt, it was because I tripped.�

�Whatever you say.�

Whereas with Edward it was "I fell down the stairs"?

quote:

We rode our motorcycles on the back roads around La Push until the rain made them too muddy and Jacob insisted that he was going to pass out if he didn�t eat soon. Billy greeted me easily when we got to the house, as if my sudden reappearance meant nothing more complicated than that I�d wanted to spend the day with my friend. After we ate the sandwiches Jacob made, we went out to the garage and I helped him clean up the bikes. I hadn�t been here in months�since Edward had returned�but there was no sense of import to it. It was just another afternoon in the garage.

�This is nice,� I commented when he pulled the warm sodas from the grocery bag. �I�ve missed this place.�

He smiled, looking around at the plastic sheds bolted together over our heads. �Yeah, I can understand that. All the splendor of the Taj Mahal, without the inconvenience and expense of traveling to India.�

�To Washington�s little Taj Mahal,� I toasted, holding up my can.

He touched his can to mine.

�Do you remember last Valentine�s Day? I think that was the last time you were here�the last time when things were still� normal, I mean.�

I laughed. �Of course I remember. I traded a lifetime of servitude for a box of conversation hearts. That�s not something I�m likely to forget.�

He laughed with me. �That�s right. Hmm, servitude. I�ll have to think of something good.� Then he sighed. �It feels like it was years ago. Another era. A happier one.�

One where she was manipulating your feelings to drive herself insane on purpose out of grief at being dumped.

quote:

I couldn�t agree with him. This was my happy era now. But I was surprised to realize how many things I missed from my own personal dark ages. I stared through the opening at the murky forest. The rain had picked up again, but it was warm in the little garage, sitting next to Jacob. He was as good as a furnace.

His fingers brushed my hand. �Things have really changed.�

�Yeah,� I said, and then I reached out and patted the back tire of my bike. �Charlie used to like me. I hope Billy doesn�t say anything about today.�� I bit my lip.

Oh gently caress off. "My dad used to like me!" What, he's supposed to forget all your worst self-destructive impulses? The reign of terror you inflicted on him for the first half of the year? How much you keep reminding him of your ability to hurt him when he tries to act like a parent?

quote:

�He won�t. He doesn�t get worked up about things the way Charlie does. Hey, I never did apologize officially for that stupid move with the bike. I�m real sorry about ratting you out to Charlie. I wish I hadn�t.�

I rolled my eyes. �Me, too.�

�I�m really, really sorry.�

He looked at me hopefully, his wet, tangled black hair sticking up in every direction around his pleading face.

�Oh, fine! You�re forgiven.�

�Thanks, Bells!�

We grinned at each other for a second, and then his face clouded over. �You know that day, when I brought the bike over� I�ve been wanting to ask you something,� he said slowly. �But also� not wanting to.�

I held very still�a reaction to stress. It was a habit I�d picked up from Edward.

Considering their relative levels of competency under pressure, more like a small rabbit.

quote:

�Were you just being stubborn because you were mad at me, or were you really serious?� he whispered.

�About what?� I whispered back, though I was sure I knew what he meant.

He glared at me. �You know. When you said it was none of my business� if�if he bit you.� He cringed visibly at the end.

�Jake�� My throat felt swollen. I couldn�t finish.

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. �Were you serious?�

He was trembling just slightly. His eyes stayed closed.

�Yes,� I whispered.

Jacob inhaled, slow and deep. �I guess I knew that.�

I stared at his face, waiting for his eyes to open.

�You know what this will mean?� He demanded suddenly. �You do understand that, don�t you? What will happen if they break the treaty?�

�We�ll leave first,� I said in a small voice.

His eyes flashed open, their black depths full of anger and pain. �There wasn�t a geographic limit to the treaty, Bella. Our great-grandfathers only agreed to keep the peace because the Cullens swore that they were different, that humans weren�t in danger from them. They promised they would never kill or change anyone ever again. If they go back on their word, the treaty is meaningless, and they are no different than any other vampires. Once that�s established, when we find them again��

�But, Jake, didn�t you break the treaty already?� I asked, grasping at straws. �Wasn�t part of it that you not tell people about the vampires? And you told me. So isn�t the treaty sort of moot, anyhow?�

Jacob didn�t like the reminder; the pain in his eyes hardened into animosity. �Yeah, I broke the treaty�back before I believed any of it. And I�m sure they were informed of that.� He glared sourly at my forehead, not meeting my shamed gaze. �But it�s not like that gives them a freebie or anything. There�s no fault for a fault. They have only one option if they object to what I did. The same option we�ll have when they break the treaty: to attack. To start the war.�

Boy, this book is really piling on reasons for Bella to give up her dreams of becoming a vampire, huh? Almost like it's a stupid impulsive teenager decision.

quote:

He made it sound so inevitable. I shuddered.

�Jake, it doesn�t have to be that way.�

His teeth ground together. �It is that way.�

The silence after his declaration felt very loud.

�Will you never forgive me, Jacob?� I whispered. As soon as I said the words, I wished I hadn�t. I didn�t want to hear his answer.

�You won�t be Bella anymore,� he told me. �My friend won�t exist. There�ll be no one to forgive.�

�That sounds like a no,� I whispered.

We faced each other for an endless moment.

I feel like this book is putting way too much effort into making Bella's choice sound like a legitimate decision between two equal options, as opposed to "the one that will ruin everyone's lives if it goes wrong" and "the one that doesn't do that."

quote:

�Is this goodbye then, Jake?�

He blinked rapidly, his fierce expression melting in surprise. �Why? We still have a few years. Can�t we be friends until we�re out of time?� �

Years? No, Jake, not years.� I shook my head, and laughed once without humor. �Weeks is more accurate.�

I was not expecting his reaction.

He was suddenly on his feet, and there was a loud pop as the soda can exploded in his hand. Soda flew everywhere, soaking me, like it was spraying from a hose.

�Jake!� I started to complain, but I fell silent when I realized that his whole body was quivering with anger. He glared at me wildly, a growling sound building in his chest.

I froze in place, too shocked to remember how to move.

The shaking rolled through him, getting faster, until it looked like he was vibrating. His shape blurred.�

And then Jacob gritted his teeth together, and the growling stopped. He squeezed his eyes tight in concentration; the quivering slowed until only his hands were shaking.

Remember how I kept bringing up how many times the wolves almost transform in a rage? That was Jacob almost actually murdering Bella right in the garage.

quote:

�Weeks,� Jacob said in a flat monotone.

I couldn�t respond; I was still frozen.

He opened his eyes. They were beyond fury now.

�He�s going to change you into a filthy bloodsucker in just a few weeks!� Jacob hissed through his teeth.

Too stunned to take offense at his words, I just nodded mutely. His face turned green under the russet skin.

�Of course, Jake,� I whispered after a long minute of silence. �He�s seventeen, Jacob. And I get closer to nineteen every day. Besides, what�s the point in waiting? He�s all I want. What else can I do?�

I�d meant that as a rhetorical question. His words cracked like snaps of a whip.

�Anything. Anything else. You�d be better off dead. I�d rather you were.�

Wow, two chapters in a row where Bella gets told she's better dying than becoming a vampire! I'm sure that will actually matter in the future!

quote:

I recoiled like he�d slapped me. It hurt worse than if he had. And then, as the pain shot through me, my own temper burst into flame.

�Maybe you�ll get lucky,� I said bleakly, lurching to my feet. �Maybe I�ll get hit by a truck on my way back.�

I grabbed my motorcycle and pushed it out into the rain. He didn�t move as I passed him. As soon as I was on the small, muddy path, I climbed on and kicked the bike to life. The rear tire spit a fountain of mud toward the garage, and I hoped that it hit him.

I got absolutely soaked as I sped across the slick highway toward the Cullens� house. The wind felt like it was freezing the rain against my skin, and my teeth were chattering before I was halfway there.

Motorcycles were too impractical for Washington. I would sell the stupid thing first chance I got.

Chapter break for length and to wash the taste of pedophilia out of my mouth.

# ? Dec 10, 2019 16:30

RaspberrySea: Nov 29, 2004

Has Meyer ever talked about what happens to a gay guy who imprints on a woman or if guys can imprint on guys? Cuz I'd like to see if her thoughts on that would rival Anne McCaffrey's Pern when it comes to homosexuality.

# ? Dec 10, 2019 19:31

Dienes: Nov 4, 2009; dee
doot doot dee
doot doot doot
doot doot dee
dee doot doot
doot doot dee
dee doot doot; College Slice

MorgaineDax posted:

Has Meyer ever talked about what happens to a gay guy who imprints on a woman or if guys can imprint on guys? Cuz I'd like to see if her thoughts on that would rival Anne McCaffrey's Pern when it comes to homosexuality.

IIRC, she's said that imprinting is fueled by :biotruths:

so you'll never get a same-sex imprint, and if you imprint on the opposite sex, they are the only person you are attracted to from then on, regardless of your past/current relationships, preferences, and orientation.

# ? Dec 10, 2019 19:51

Midjack: Dec 24, 2007

Wow yeah so that just happened in a young adult bestseller.

# ? Dec 10, 2019 20:03

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

Midjack posted:

Wow yeah so that just happened in a young adult bestseller.

Good summary of the book.

# ? Dec 10, 2019 20:06

Midjack: Dec 24, 2007

chitoryu12 posted:

Good summary of the book.

I had no exposure to any of this beyond knowing it was popular, involved vampires and werewolves, and seeing some of the Team Edward/Jacob merch in bookstores so this thread has been a real revelation for me. Thanks for doing this!

# ? Dec 10, 2019 20:09

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

I did say I wanted to make sure I could legitimately criticize the books beyond just seeing a synopsis and some people saying why they're bad. I just didn't expect them to be so goddamn gross.

# ? Dec 10, 2019 20:33

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

quote:

I walked the bike into the Cullens� cavernous garage and was unsurprised to find Alice waiting for me, perched lightly on the hood of her Porsche. Alice stroked the glossy yellow paint.

�I haven�t even had a chance to drive it.� She sighed.

�Sorry,� I spit through my rattling teeth.

�You look like you could use a hot shower,� she said, offhand, as she sprang lightly to her feet.

�Yep.�

She pursed her lips, taking in my expression carefully. �Do you want to talk about it?�

�Nope.�

She nodded in assent, but her eyes were raging with curiosity.

�Do you want to go to Olympia tonight?�

�Not really. Can�t I go home?�

She grimaced.

�Never mind, Alice,� I said. �I�ll stay if it makes things easier for you.�

"Otherwise the master kidnapper will throw a tantrum and break poo poo."

quote:

�Thanks,� she sighed in relief.

I went to bed early that night, curling up on his sofa again.

It was still dark when I woke. I was groggy, but I knew it wasn�t near morning yet. My eyes closed, and I stretched, rolling over. It took me a second before I realized that the movement should have dumped me onto the floor. And that I was much too comfortable.

I rolled back over, trying to see. It was darker than last night�the clouds were too thick for the moon to shine through.

�Sorry,� he murmured so softly that his voice was part of the darkness. �I didn�t mean to wake you.�

I tensed, waiting for the fury�both his and mine�but it was only quiet and calm in the darkness of his room. I could almost taste the sweetness of reunion in the air, a separate fragrance from the perfume of his breath; the emptiness when we were apart left its own bitter aftertaste, something I didn�t consciously notice until it was removed.

There was no friction in the space between us. The stillness was peaceful�not like the calm before the tempest, but like a clear night untouched by even the dream of a storm.

No amount of flowery language will make this three-way relationship any less toxic.

quote:

And I didn�t care that I was supposed to be angry with him. I didn�t care that I was supposed to be angry with everyone. I reached out for him, found his hands in the darkness, and pulled myself closer to him. His arms encircled me, cradling me to his chest. My lips searched, hunting along his throat, to his chin, till I finally found his lips.

Edward kissed me softly for a moment, and then he chuckled.

�I was all braced for the wrath that was going to put grizzlies to shame, and this is what I get? I should infuriate you more often.�

�Give me a minute to work up to it,� I teased, kissing him again.

�I�ll wait as long as you want,� he whispered against my lips. His fingers knotted in my hair.

If all of your romantic moments come off as disturbing, maybe you should reconsider being a writer.

quote:

My breath was becoming uneven. �Maybe in the morning.�

�Whatever you prefer.�

�Welcome home,� I said while his cold lips pressed under my jaw. �I�m glad you came back.�

�That�s a very good thing.�

�Mmm,� I agreed, tightening my arms around his neck.

His hand curved around my elbow, moving slowly down my arm, across my ribs and over my waist, tracing along my hip and down my leg, around my knee. He paused there, his hand curling around my calf. He pulled my leg up suddenly, hitching it around his hip.

I stopped breathing. This wasn�t the kind of thing he usually allowed. Despite his cold hands, I felt suddenly warm. His lips moved in the hollow at the base of my throat.

�Not to bring on the ire prematurely,� he whispered, �but do you mind telling me what it is about this bed that you object to?�

"The coverlet was a dull gold, just lighter than the walls; the frame was black, made of intricately patterned wrought iron. Sculpted metal roses wound in vines up the tall posts and formed a bowery lattice overhead."

It's gaudy as all hell is what I object to!

quote:

Before I could answer, before I could even concentrate enough to make sense of his words, he rolled to the side, pulling me on top of him. He held my face in his hands, angling it up so that his mouth could reach my throat. My breathing was too loud�it was almost embarrassing, but I couldn�t care quite enough to be ashamed.

�The bed?� he asked again. �I think it�s nice.�

�It�s unnecessary,� I managed to gasp.

He pulled my face back to his, and my lips shaped themselves around his. Slowly this time, he rolled till he hovered over me. He held himself carefully so that I felt none of his weight, but I could feel the cool marble of his body press against mine. My heart was hammering so loudly that it was hard to hear his quiet laughter.

�That�s debatable,� he disagreed. �This would be difficult on a couch.�

Cold as ice, his tongue lightly traced the shape of my lips.

My head was spinning�the air was coming too fast and shallow.

Just shows what experience Edward has if he thinks any of that is difficult on a couch. The guy's canonically been a virgin for 107 years.

quote:

�Did you change your mind?� I asked breathlessly. Maybe he�d rethought all his careful rules. Maybe there was more significance to this bed than I�d originally guessed. My heart pounded almost painfully as I waited for his answer.

Edward sighed, rolling back so that we were on our sides again.

�Don�t be ridiculous, Bella,� he said, disapproval strong in his voice�clearly, he understood what I meant. �I was just trying to illustrate the benefits of the bed you don�t seem to like. Don�t get carried away.�

�Too late,� I muttered. �And I like the bed,� I added.

�Good.� I could hear the smile in his voice as he kissed my forehead. �I do, too.�

�But I still think it�s unnecessary,� I continued. �If we�re not going to get carried away, what�s the point?�

He sighed again. �For the hundredth time, Bella�it�s too dangerous.� �I like danger,� I insisted.

Bella's like a lame version of those edgy Hot Topic kids.

quote:

�I know.� There was a sour edge to his voice, and I realized that he would have seen the motorcycle in the garage.

�I�ll tell you what�s dangerous,� I said quickly, before he could move to a new topic of discussion. �I�m going to spontaneously combust one of these days�and you�ll have no one but yourself to blame.�

He started to push me away.

�What are you doing?� I objected, clinging to him.

�Protecting you from combustion. If this is too much for you.��

�I can handle it,� I insisted.

He let me worm myself back into the circle of his arms.

I was really confused because everything past Bella's first line was on a new page and that was the weirdest way to change the subject.

quote:

�I�m sorry I gave you the wrong impression,� he said. �I didn�t mean to make you unhappy. That wasn�t nice.�

Neither was the kidnapping and surveillance, but...

quote:

�Actually, it was very, very nice.�

He took a deep breath. �Aren�t you tired? I should let you sleep.�

�No, I�m not. I don�t mind if you want to give me the wrong impression again.�

�That�s probably a bad idea. You�re not the only one who gets carried away.�

�Yes, I am,� I grumbled.

He chuckled. �You have no idea, Bella. It doesn�t help that you are so eager to undermine my self-control, either.�

In case you were curious: yes, vampires can get an erection. Stephenie Meyer had to scramble for justifications for vampire sex and the results are not pretty.

quote:

�I�m not going to apologize for that.�

�Can I apologize?�

�For what?�

�You were angry with me, remember?�

�Oh, that.�

�I�m sorry. I was wrong. It�s much easier to have the proper perspective when I have you safely here.� His arms tightened around me. �I go a little berserk when I try to leave you. I don�t think I�ll go so far again. It�s not worth it.�

I smiled. �Didn�t you find any mountain lions?�

�Yes, I did, actually. Still not worth the anxiety. I�m sorry I had Alice hold you hostage, though. That was a bad idea.�

�Yes,� I agreed.

�I won�t do it again.�

Hope that works as a legal defense!

quote:

�Okay,� I said easily. He was already forgiven. �But slumber parties do have their advantages.�� I curled myself closer to him, pressing my lips into the indentation over his collarbone. �You can hold me hostage any time you want.�

�Mmm,� he sighed. �I may take you up on that.�

�So is it my turn now?�

�Your turn?� his voice was confused.

�To apologize.�

�What do you have to apologize for?�

�Aren�t you mad at me?� I asked blankly.

�No.� It sounded like he really meant it.

I felt my eyebrows pull together. �Didn�t you see Alice when you got home?�

�Yes�why?�

�Are you going to take her Porsche back?�

�Of course not. It was a gift.�

I wished I could see his expression. His voice sounded as if I�d insulted him.

Then why do you terrorize your family so much that they think you would do that out of spiteful rage?

quote:

�Don�t you want to know what I did?� I asked, starting to be puzzled by his apparent lack of concern.

I felt him shrug. �I�m always interested in everything you do�but you don�t have to tell me unless you want to.�

�But I went to La Push.�

�I know.�

�And I ditched school.�

�So did I.�

I stared toward the sound of his voice, tracing his features with my fingers, trying to understand his mood. �Where did all this tolerance come from?� I demanded.

Yes, it is actually extremely unusual for someone to shift gears from "Commits multiple felonies with the aid of his family to stop his girlfriend from doing things he doesn't like" to "Is fine with everything" over the course of a single day! Of course, Meyer is the queen of character mood swings.

quote:

He sighed.

�I decided that you were right. My problem before was more about my� prejudice against werewolves than anything else. I�m going to try to be more reasonable and trust your judgment. If you say it�s safe, then I�ll believe you.�

�Wow.�

�And� most importantly� I�m not willing to let this drive a wedge between us.�

I rested my head against his chest and closed my eyes, totally content.

�So,� he murmured in a casual tone. �Did you make plans to go back to La Push again soon?�

I didn�t answer. His question brought back the memory of Jacob�s words, and my throat was suddenly tight.

He misread my silence and the tension in my body.

�Just so that I can make my own plans,� he explained quickly. �I don�t want you to feel like you have to hurry back because I�m sitting around waiting for you.�

�No,� I said in a voice that sounded strange to me. �I don�t have plans to go back.�

�Oh. You don�t have to do that for me.�

�I don�t think I�m welcome anymore,� I whispered.

�Did you run over someone�s cat?� he asked lightly. I knew he didn�t want to force the story out of me, but I could hear the curiosity burning behind his words.

That's the first thing you think she did?

quote:

�No.� I took a deep breath, and then mumbled quickly through the explanation. �I thought Jacob would have realized� I didn�t think it would surprise him.�

Edward waited while I hesitated.

�He wasn�t expecting� that it was so soon.�

�Ah,� Edward said quietly.

�He said he�d rather see me dead.� My voice broke on the last word.

Edward was too still for a moment, controlling whatever reaction he didn�t want me to see.

Then he crushed me gently to his chest. �I�m so sorry.�

�I thought you�d be glad,� I whispered.

�Glad over something that�s hurt you?� he murmured into my hair. �I don�t think so, Bella.�

"Only I'm allowed to hurt you and then feel bad about it later!"

quote:

I sighed and relaxed, fitting myself to the stone shape of him. But he was motionless again, tense.

�What�s wrong?� I asked.

�It�s nothing.�

�You can tell me.�

He paused for a minute. �It might make you angry.�

�I still want to know.�

He sighed. �I could quite literally kill him for saying that to you. I want to.�

I laughed halfheartedly. �I guess it�s a good thing you�ve got so much self-control.�

�I could slip.� His tone was thoughtful.

Always make sure to date people who could slip up and murder your friends and family at any time.

quote:

�If you�re going to have a lapse in control, I can think of a better place for it.� I reached for his face, trying to pull myself up to kiss him. His arms held me tighter, restraining.

He sighed. �Must I always be the responsible one?�

I grinned in the darkness. �No. Let me be in charge of responsibility for a few minutes� or hours.�

Bella immediately leaps out the window.

quote:

�Goodnight, Bella.�

�Wait�there was something else I wanted to ask you about.�

�What�s that?�

�I was talking to Rosalie last night.��

His body tensed again. �Yes. She was thinking about that when I got in. She gave you quite a lot to consider, didn�t she?�

His voice was anxious, and I realized that he thought I wanted to talk about the reasons Rosalie�d given me for staying human. But I was interested in something much more pressing.

�She told me a little bit� about the time your family lived in Denali.�

There was a short pause; this beginning took him by surprise. �Yes?�

�She mentioned something about a bunch of female vampires� and you.�

He didn�t answer, though I waited for a long moment.

�Don�t worry,� I said, after the silence had grown uncomfortable. �She told me you didn�t� show any preference. But I was just wondering, you know, if any of them had. Shown a preference for you, I mean.�

Why do you care? Why is the plot getting derailed again for bullshit?

quote:

Again he said nothing.

�Which one?� I asked, trying to keep my voice casual, and not quite managing. �Or was there more than one?�

No answer. I wished I could see his face, so I could try to guess what this silence meant.

�Alice will tell me,� I said. �I�ll go ask her right now.�

His arms tightened; I was unable to squirm even an inch away.

�It�s late,� he said. His voice had a little edge to it that was something new. Sort of nervous, maybe a little embarrassed. �Besides, I think Alice stepped out.��

�It�s bad,� I guessed. �It�s really bad, isn�t it?� I started to panic, my heart accelerating as I imagined the gorgeous immortal rival I�d never realized I had.

�Calm down, Bella,� he said, kissing the tip of my nose. �You�re being absurd.�

�Am I? Then why won�t you tell me?�

�Because there�s nothing to tell. You�re blowing this wildly out of proportion.�

Spoilers: she is. Tanya appears in Midnight Sun and Edward makes it clear that he doesn't reciprocate her romantic feelings. This is just Bella having a jealousy-induced panic attack that bogs down the plot and makes her less likable for no good reason.

quote:

�Which one?� I insisted.

He sighed. �Tanya expressed a little interest. I let her know, in a very courteous, gentlemanly fashion, that I did not return that interest. End of story.�

I kept my voice as even as possible. �Tell me something�what does Tanya look like?�

�Just like the rest of us�white skin, gold eyes,� he answered too quickly.

�And, of course, extraordinarily beautiful.�

I felt him shrug. �I suppose, to human eyes,� he said, indifferent. �You know what, though?�

�What?� My voice was petulant.

He put his lips right to my ear; his cold breath tickled. �I prefer brunettes.�

�She�s a blonde. That figures.�

�Strawberry blonde�not at all my type.�

For eating, or....

quote:

I thought about that for a while, trying to concentrate as his lips moved slowly along my cheek, down my throat, and back up again. He made the circuit three times before I spoke.

�I guess that�s okay, then,� I decided.

�Hmm,� he whispered against my skin. �You�re quite adorable when you�re jealous. It�s surprisingly enjoyable.�

I scowled into the darkness.

�It�s late,� he said again, murmuring, almost crooning now, his voice smoother than silk. �Sleep, my Bella. Dream happy dreams. You are the only one who has ever touched my heart. It will always be yours. Sleep, my only love.�

He started to hum my lullaby, and I knew it was only a matter of time till I succumbed, so I closed my eyes and snuggled closer into his chest.

# ? Dec 11, 2019 20:08

Mouzer: May 9, 2006; Feed the fish!

Is he..... Enchanting her to sleep?

# ? Dec 11, 2019 21:17

HopperUK: Apr 29, 2007; Why would an ambulance be leaving the hospital?

Really enjoyed this thread.

It's bewildering to me how someone can create so many interesting and rich characters and apparently not notice that, or something, and shuffle them to the sidelines in favour of the three boring, unpleasant dipshits we're forced to spend time with in these books. Even Jacob was a little ray of sunshine before the werewolf thing happened.

# ? Dec 11, 2019 22:25

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

Chapter 9: Target

quote:

Alice dropped me off in the morning, in keeping with the slumber party charade. It wouldn�t be long until Edward showed up, officially returning from his �hiking� trip. All of the pretenses were starting to wear on me. I wouldn�t miss this part of being human.

Charlie peeked through the front window when he heard me slam the car door. He waved to Alice, and then went to get the door for me.

�Did you have fun?� Charlie asked.

�Sure, it was great. Very� girlie.�

I carried my stuff in, dumped it all at the foot of the stairs, and wandered into the kitchen to look for a snack.

�You�ve got a message,� Charlie called after me.

On the kitchen counter, the phone message pad was propped up conspicuously against a saucepan.

Jacob called, Charlie had written.

He said he didn�t mean it, and that he�s sorry. He wants you to call him. Be nice and give him a break. He sounded upset.

I grimaced. Charlie didn�t usually editorialize on my messages.

Jacob could just go ahead and be upset. I didn�t want to talk to him. Last I�d heard, they weren�t big on allowing phone calls from the other side. If Jacob preferred me dead, then maybe he should get used to the silence.

Nearly transforming into a giant rage wolf and saying "I'd rather you died" isn't exactly something you can take back with a simple apology.

quote:

My appetite evaporated. I turned an about face and went to put my things away.

�Aren�t you going to call Jacob?� Charlie asked. He was leaning around the living room wall, watching me pick up.

�No.�

I started up the stairs.

�That�s not very attractive behavior, Bella,� he said. �Forgiveness is divine.�

�Mind your own business,� I muttered under my breath, much too low for him to hear.

Every so often you get reminded this is a young adult book and Bella is still a teenager.

quote:

I knew the laundry was building up, so after I put my toothpaste away and threw my dirty clothes in the hamper, I went to strip Charlie�s bed. I left his sheets in a pile at the top of the stairs and went to get mine.

I paused beside the bed, cocking my head to the side.

Where was my pillow? I turned in a circle, scanning the room. No pillow. I noticed that my room looked oddly tidy. Hadn�t my gray sweatshirt been draped over the low bedpost on the footboard? And I would swear there had been a pair of dirty socks behind the rocking chair, along with the red blouse I�d tried on two mornings ago, but decided was too dressy for school, hanging over the arm.� I spun around again. My hamper wasn�t empty, but it wasn�t overflowing, the way I thought it had been.

Was Charlie doing laundry? That was out of character.

�Dad, did you start the wash?� I shouted out my door.

�Um, no,� he shouted back, sounding guilty. �Did you want me to?�

�No, I got it. Were you looking for something in my room?�

�No. Why?�

�I can�t find� a shirt.��

�I haven�t been in there.�

And then I remembered that Alice had been here to get my pajamas. I hadn�t noticed that she�d borrowed my pillow, too�probably since I�d avoided the bed. It looked like she had cleaned while she was passing through. I blushed for my slovenly ways.

Is she slovenly, though? The first book established that she does all the cooking and cleaning because of her mother's irresponsibility and Charlie's lack of skill at it. She was obviously a mess in New Moon but I thought she'd be back to normal by now.

quote:

But that red shirt really wasn�t dirty, so I went to save it from the hamper.

I expected to find it near the top, but it wasn�t there. I dug through the whole pile and still couldn�t find it. I knew I was probably getting paranoid, but it seemed like something else was missing, or maybe more than one something. I didn�t even have half a load here.

I ripped my sheets off and headed for the laundry closet, grabbing Charlie�s on the way. The washing machine was empty. I checked the dryer, too, half-expecting to find a washed load waiting for me, courtesy of Alice. Nothing. I frowned, mystified.

I had this problem with my khakis too! I'm pretty sure someone thought they were too short and threw them out when I wasn't looking.

quote:

�Did you find what you were looking for?� Charlie yelled.

�Not yet.�

I went back upstairs to search under my bed. Nothing but dust bunnies. I started to dig through my dresser. Maybe I�d put the red shirt away and forgotten.

I gave up when the doorbell rang. That would be Edward.

�Door,� Charlie informed me from the couch as I skipped past him.

�Don�t strain yourself, Dad.�

I pulled the door open with a big smile on my face.

Edward�s golden eyes were wide, his nostrils flared, his lips pulled back over his teeth.

�Edward?� My voice was sharp with shock as I read his expression. �What�?�

He put his finger to my lips. �Give me two seconds,� he whispered. �Don�t move.�

I stood frozen on the doorstep and he� disappeared. He moved so quickly that Charlie wouldn�t even have seen him pass.

Again, I wish the movies went whole hog with the vampires using their super speed all the time when nobody but Bella is paying attention. Just zipping around too fast to see everywhere they go, popping up out of corners and appearing next to people instantly when called from their room.

quote:

Before I could compose myself enough to count to two, he was back. He put his arm around my waist and pulled me swiftly toward the kitchen. His eyes darted around the room, and he held me against his body as if he were shielding me from something. I threw a glance toward Charlie on the couch, but he was studiously ignoring us.

�Someone�s been here,� he murmured in my ear after he pulled me to the back of the kitchen. His voice was strained; it was difficult to hear him over the thumping of the washing machine.

�I swear that no werewolves�� I started to say.

�Not one of them,� he interrupted me quickly, shaking his head. �One of us.�

His tone made it clear that he didn�t mean a member of his family.

I felt the blood empty from my face.

�Victoria?� I choked.

�It�s not a scent I recognize.�

�One of the Volturi,� I guessed.

�Probably.�

�When?�

�That�s why I think it must have been them�it wasn�t long ago, early this morning while Charlie was sleeping. And whoever it was didn�t touch him, so there must have been another purpose.�

�Looking for me.�

The plot is looking for her no matter how hard she runs away from it!

quote:

He didn�t answer. His body was frozen, a statue.

�What are you two hissing about in here?� Charlie asked suspiciously, rounding the corner with an empty popcorn bowl in his hands.

I felt green. A vampire had been in the house looking for me while Charlie slept. Panic overwhelmed me, closed my throat. I couldn�t answer, I just stared at him in horror.

Charlie�s expression changed. Abruptly, he was grinning. �If you two are having a fight� well, don�t let me interrupt.�

Still grinning, he put his bowl in the sink and sauntered out of the room.

Charlie is just so loving excited about the prospect of his daughter breaking up with this pale weirdo.

quote:

�Let�s go,� Edward said in a low hard voice.

�But Charlie!� The fear was squeezing my chest, making it hard to breathe.

He deliberated for a short second, and then his phone was in his hand.

�Emmett,� he muttered into the receiver. He began talking so fast that I couldn�t understand the words. It was over in half a minute. He started pulling me toward the door.

Vampires not only have super speed, they have super fast muttering powers! It's like a quiet version of those guys saying disclaimers really fast in commercials.

quote:

�Emmett and Jasper are on their way,� he whispered when he felt my resistance. �They�ll sweep the woods. Charlie is fine.�

I let him drag me along then, too panicked to think clearly. Charlie met my frightened eyes with a smug grin, which suddenly turned to confusion. Edward had me out the door before Charlie could say anything.

Is there any particular reason Charlie shouldn't be chasing after them right now? From his perspective he just caught his daughter having a whispered argument with her boyfriend, followed by him physically dragging her out the door too fast for words.

quote:

�Where are we going?� I couldn�t stop whispering, even after we were in the car.

�We�re going to talk to Alice,� he told me, his volume normal but his voice bleak.

�You think maybe she saw something?�

He stared at the road through narrowed eyes. �Maybe.�

They were waiting for us, on alert after Edward�s call. It was like walking into a museum, everyone still as statues in various poses of stress.

�What happened?� Edward demanded as soon as we were through the door. I was shocked to see that he was glowering at Alice, his hands fisted in anger.

Alice stood with her arms folded tight across her chest. Only her lips moved. �I have no idea. I didn�t see anything.�

�How is that possible?� he hissed.

�Edward,� I said, a quiet reproof. I didn�t like him talking to Alice this way.

Carlisle interrupted in a calming voice. �It�s not an exact science, Edward.�

It's not really a science at all, actually. It just works with the speed and accuracy the plot demands.

quote:

�He was in her room, Alice. He could have still been there�waiting for her.�

�I would have seen that.�

Edward threw his hands up in exasperation. �Really? You�re sure?�

Alice�s voice was cold when she answered. �You�ve already got me watching the Volturis� decisions, watching for Victoria�s return, watching Bella�s every step. You want to add another? Do I just have to watch Charlie, or Bella�s room, or the house, or the whole street, too? Edward, if I try to do too much, things are going to start slipping through the cracks.�

�It looks like they already are,� Edward snapped.

�She was never in any danger. There was nothing to see.�

�If you�re watching Italy, why didn�t you see them send��

�I don�t think it�s them,� Alice insisted. �I would have seen that.�

�Who else would leave Charlie alive?�

Someone who wants to keep at least one decent person alive on the cast.

quote:

I shuddered.

�I don�t know,� Alice said.

�Helpful.�

�Stop it, Edward,� I whispered.

He turned on me, his face still livid, his teeth clenched together. He glared at me for half a second, and then, suddenly, he exhaled. His eyes widened and his jaw relaxed.

�You�re right, Bella. I�m sorry.� He looked at Alice. �Forgive me, Alice. I shouldn�t be taking this out on you. That was inexcusable.�

"I understand,� Alice assured him. �I�m not happy about it, either.�

Edward took a deep breath. �Okay, let�s look at this logically. What are the possibilities?�

Everyone seemed to thaw out at once. Alice relaxed and leaned against the back of the couch. Carlisle walked slowly toward her, his eyes far away. Esme sat on the sofa in front of Alice, curling her legs up on the seat. Only Rosalie remained unmoving, her back to us, staring out the glass wall.

Contemplating a way of just throwing Bella in a wood chipper.

quote:

Edward pulled me to the sofa and I sat next to Esme, who shifted to put her arm around me. He held one of my hands tightly in both of his.

�Victoria?� Carlisle asked.

Edward shook his head. �No. I didn�t know the scent. He might have been from the Volturi, someone I�ve never met.��

Alice shook her head. �Aro hasn�t asked anyone to look for her yet. I will see that. I�m waiting for it.�

Edward�s head snapped up. �You�re watching for an official command.�

�You think someone�s acting on their own? Why?�

�Caius�s idea,� Edward suggested, his face tightening again.

�Or Jane�s�,� Alice said. �They both have the resources to send an unfamiliar face.��

Edward scowled. �And the motivation.�

�It doesn�t make sense, though,� Esme said. �If whoever it was meant to wait for Bella, Alice would have seen that. He�or she�had no intention of hurting Bella. Or Charlie, for that matter.�

I cringed at my father�s name.

That line could sum up their relationship pretty well.

quote:

�It�s going to be fine, Bella,� Esme murmured, smoothing my hair.

�But what was the point then?� Carlisle mused.

�Checking to see if I�m still human?� I guessed.

�Possible,� Carlisle said.

Rosalie breathed out a sigh, loud enough for me to hear. She�d unfrozen, and her face was turned expectantly toward the kitchen. Edward, on the other hand, looked discouraged.

Emmett burst through the kitchen door, Jasper right behind him.

�Long gone, hours ago,� Emmett announced, disappointed. �The trail went East, then South, and disappeared on a side road. Had a car waiting.�

�That�s bad luck,� Edward muttered. �If he�d gone west� well, it would be nice for those dogs to make themselves useful.�

I winced, and Esme rubbed my shoulder.

Don't you love the scenes where Bella can do nothing of importance and it's just all the other characters talking around her while she whimpers and contorts herself in agony in the background?

quote:

Jasper looked at Carlisle. �Neither of us recognized him. But here.� He held out something green and crumpled. Carlisle took it from him and held it to his face. I saw, as it exchanged hands, that it was a broken fern frond. �Maybe you know the scent.�

�No,� Carlisle said. �Not familiar. No one I�ve ever met.�

�Perhaps we�re looking at this the wrong way. Maybe it�s a coincidence�,� Esme began, but stopped when she saw everyone else�s incredulous expressions. �I don�t mean a coincidence that a stranger happened to pick Bella�s house to visit at random. I meant that maybe someone was just curious. Our scent is all around her. Was he wondering what draws us there?�

�Why wouldn�t he just come here then? If he was curious?� Emmett demanded.

�You would,� Esme said with a sudden, fond smile. �The rest of us aren�t always so direct. Our family is very large�he or she might be frightened. But Charlie wasn�t harmed. This doesn�t have to be an enemy.�

Does Emmett just have a history of Kool-Aid Manning his way into vampire covens to ask what's up?

quote:

Just curious. Like James and Victoria had been curious, in the beginning? The thought of Victoria made me tremble, though the one thing they seemed certain of was that it had not been her. Not this time. She would stick to her obsessed pattern. This was just someone else, a stranger.

Dead Herring!

quote:

I was slowly realizing that vampires were much bigger participants in this world than I�d once thought. How many times did the average human cross paths with them, completely unaware? How many deaths, obliviously reported as crimes and accidents, were really due to their thirst? How crowded would this new world be when I finally joined it?

The shrouded future sent a shiver down my spine.

You're just now thinking about this? One of the most obvious conclusions to make when you find out that vampires are a thing?

quote:

The Cullens pondered Esme�s words with varying expressions. I could see that Edward did not accept her theory, and that Carlisle very much wanted to.

How? Nobody can figure that out just by people's expressions!

quote:

Alice pursed her lips. �I don�t think so. The timing of it was too perfect.� This visitor was so careful to make no contact. Almost like he or she knew that I would see.��

�He could have other reasons for not making contact,� Esme reminded her.

�Does it really matter who it was?� I asked. �Just the chance that someone was looking for me� isn�t that reason enough? We shouldn�t wait for graduation.�

�No, Bella,� Edward said quickly. �It�s not that bad. If you�re really in danger, we�ll know.�

�Think of Charlie,� Carlisle reminded me. �Think of how it would hurt him if you disappeared.�

�I am thinking of Charlie! He�s the one I�m worried about! What if my little guest had happened to be thirsty last night? As long as I�m around Charlie, he�s a target, too. If anything happened to him, it would be all my fault!�

"I can abandon him forever a few weeks from now after making him hate me and leave him wondering why his family just fell apart around him, but God forbid he dies!"

quote:

�Hardly, Bella,� Esme said, patting my hair again. �And nothing will happen to Charlie. We�re just going to have to be more careful.�

�More careful?� I repeated in disbelief.

�It�s all going to be fine, Bella,� Alice promised; Edward squeezed my hand.

And I could see, looking at all of their beautiful faces one by one, that nothing I could say was going to change their minds.

Chapter break. Somehow even when the plot returns, it's just goddamn boring.

# ? Dec 12, 2019 17:56

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

This is actual loving canon.

# ? Dec 13, 2019 00:06

HopperUK: Apr 29, 2007; Why would an ambulance be leaving the hospital?

Christ why can't she just say 'huh, I never really thought of that, I guess it wouldn't be enough to have an effect' or something. Instead of making up bizarre factoids.

# ? Dec 13, 2019 01:00

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

HopperUK posted:

Christ why can't she just say 'huh, I never really thought of that, I guess it wouldn't be enough to have an effect' or something. Instead of making up bizarre factoids.

I actually saw a long chain of posts on Tumblr where people used the bite from James as a perfect justification for a lot of the stuff that happens, from Bella's impulsiveness and hallucinations in New Moon to her perfect Mary Sue resistance to blood thirst and not having any of the negatives of the vampire transformation. Meyer just has no consistency in anything she writes, so even stuff that could be justifiable ends up not.

# ? Dec 13, 2019 01:03

Dawgstar: Jul 15, 2017

HopperUK posted:

Christ why can't she just say 'huh, I never really thought of that, I guess it wouldn't be enough to have an effect' or something. Instead of making up bizarre factoids.

The mental image of Edward doing serious duck face and inhaling so hard his cheeks go concave will now stay with me until I die. (Rowling might still have her beat, if that helps.)

# ? Dec 13, 2019 01:50

HopperUK: Apr 29, 2007; Why would an ambulance be leaving the hospital?

chitoryu12 posted:

I actually saw a long chain of posts on Tumblr where people used the bite from James as a perfect justification for a lot of the stuff that happens, from Bella's impulsiveness and hallucinations in New Moon to her perfect Mary Sue resistance to blood thirst and not having any of the negatives of the vampire transformation. Meyer just has no consistency in anything she writes, so even stuff that could be justifiable ends up not.

Yet another example of why these books could work if they were somehow written by almost anyone else, really. I bet there's fanfic out there that is way better than the books are.

# ? Dec 13, 2019 01:57

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

Heading out of town. Thread updates will continue in about two weeks!

# ? Dec 13, 2019 16:45

SUPERMAN'S GAL PAL: Feb 21, 2006; Holy Moly! DARKSEID IS!

Have a safe trip!

Somehow I missed out on this thread until now. The sporking that�s been referred to I read in real time as much of it posted. If anyone following this is interested in how Twilight did so well then plummeted off the popular map I encourage you to look up Mervin�s reviews of various forum posts, interviews, and other communication Meyer herself had with fans, including a post from her brother-in-law where he responded in an rear end in a top hat way. This would have a ton of spoilers though so wait for the books to be done.

There�s another very old review, the �Sparkledammerung,� which was made by an LJ user who had left the Mormon church as a young adult. If you have interest in how Meyer�s upbringing and religion likely influenced her work, check that out, again very spoilery. I believe it was referred to earlier in the thread but there are parallels with how Edward and Joseph Smith are described; also the �imprinting� is interpreted as the idea that in Mormon faith you have a predestined spouse.

If anything this thread is making me appreciate the secondary characters more. I already support Leah Clearwater big time for a series I overall despise; Twilight is an exercise in wasted potential. While I�m glad it popularized the genre it�s so frustrating to see so many interesting ideas squandered.

# ? Dec 14, 2019 13:17

Midjack: Dec 24, 2007

https://mobile.twitter.com/robertarchives/status/1204504471486660608

# ? Dec 15, 2019 20:11

Cythereal: Nov 8, 2009; I love the potoo,
and the potoo loves you.

I got linked this thread this morning and read through it today out of bile fascination. Atrocious subject matter, entertaining snark.

What is it about Mormons writing fantasy and sci-fi that makes them so weird and full of utter sociopaths? Mormons gave us Twilight, the Ender's Game universe, and the goddamn kender from Dragonlance.

Twilight, at least, is explicable enough by the author's own admission that it was based on a sex dream. A middle-aged Mormon housewife's wet dream becoming a best-selling book series and brief media phenomenon would be funny if I wasn't so concerned about the legitimate damage it may have done to young women.

# ? Dec 23, 2019 03:59

Epicurius: Apr 10, 2010; College Slice

Cythereal posted:

What is it about Mormons writing fantasy and sci-fi that makes them so weird and full of utter sociopaths? Mormons gave us Twilight, the Ender's Game universe, and the goddamn kender from Dragonlance.

Eh, Tracy Hickman and Tasslehoff aren't that bad. Tasslehoff isn't a sociopath. He's a kleptomaniac with ADHD, but he'd do anything for his friends, and one of his defining personality traits is that he hates cruelty and seeing innocent people suffer. And, while I'm no big fan of OSC's politics, Ender from Ender's Game isn't a sociopath. He's in a situation where believes that all he's doing is playing a simulation, and then, when he discovers the truth, is ashamed and dedicates the rest of his life to make up for his actions. That's really what both Speaker for the Dead and Ender's Exile are about.

So really, it's not Mormons so much as it's just her.

# ? Dec 23, 2019 15:32

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

quote:

It was a quiet ride home. I was frustrated. Against my better judgment, I was still human.

Yeah in case you thought she had any other concerns during that scene, it really was just her going "Turn me into a vampire now!" again.

quote:

�You won�t be alone for a second,� Edward promised as he drove me to Charlie�s. �Someone will always be there. Emmett, Alice, Jasper��

I sighed. �This is ridiculous. They�ll get so bored, they�ll have to kill me themselves, just for something to do.�

Edward gave me a sour look. �Hilarious, Bella.�

Charlie was in a good mood when we got back. He could see the tension between me and Edward, and he was misinterpreting it. He watched me throw together his dinner with a smug smile on his face. Edward had excused himself for a moment, to do some surveillance, I assumed, but Charlie waited till he was back to pass on my messages.

Meyer is just trying so hard to make us hate Charlie and sympathize with Bella's desire to cut herself off permanently from him, and it keeps backfiring.

quote:

�Jacob called again,� Charlie said as soon as Edward was in the room. I kept my face empty as I set the plate in front of him.

�Is that a fact?�

Charlie frowned. �Don�t be petty, Bella. He sounded really low.�

�Is Jacob paying you for all the P.R., or are you a volunteer?�

Charlie grumbled incoherently at me until the food cut off his garbled complaint.

Though he didn�t realize it, he�d found his mark.

My life was feeling a lot like a game of dice right now�would the next roll come up snake eyes? What if something did happen to me? It seemed worse than petty to leave Jacob feeling guilty about what he�d said.

But I didn�t want to talk to him with Charlie around, to have to watch my every word so I didn�t let the wrong thing slip. Thinking about this made me jealous of Jacob and Billy�s relationship. How easy it must be when you had no secrets from the person you lived with.

And when you aren't intentionally hurting your dad as much as possible out of spite.

quote:

So I would wait for the morning. I most likely wasn�t going to die tonight, after all, and it wouldn�t hurt him to feel guilty for twelve more hours. It might even be good for him.

When Edward officially left for the evening, I wondered who was out in the downpour, keeping an eye on Charlie and me. I felt awful for Alice or whoever else it might be, but still comforted. I had to admit it was nice, knowing I wasn�t alone. And Edward was back in record time.

He sang me to sleep again and�aware even in unconsciousness that he was there�I slept free of nightmares.

Edward just reciting "Goodnight Moon" to Bella every night while Alice and Emmett try to see who can throw boulders over the house the farthest.

quote:

In the morning, Charlie left to go fishing with Deputy Mark before I was up. I decided to use this lack of supervision to be divine.

�I�m going to let Jacob off the hook,� I warned Edward after I�d eaten breakfast.

What kind of loving description of Bella is that? "Divine?"

quote:

�I knew you�d forgive him,� he said with an easy smile. �Holding grudges is not one of your many talents.�

I rolled my eyes, but I was pleased. It seemed like Edward really was over the whole anti-werewolf thing.

I didn�t look at the clock until after I�d dialed. It was a little early for calls, and I worried that I would wake Billy and Jake, but someone picked up before the second ring, so he couldn�t have been too far from the phone.

�Hello?� a dull voice said.

�Jacob?�

�Bella!� he exclaimed. �Oh, Bella, I�m so sorry!� he tripped over the words as he hurried to get them out. �I swear I didn�t mean it. I was just being stupid. I was angry�but that�s no excuse. It was the stupidest thing I�ve ever said in my life and I�m sorry. Don�t be mad at me, please? Please. Lifetime of servitude up for grabs�all you have to do is forgive me.�

�I�m not mad. You�re forgiven.�

�Thank you,� he breathed fervently. �I can�t believe I was such a jerk.�

�Don�t worry about that�I�m used to it.�

This is supposed to be the "young adult book" coming out again, but you can't use cliche high school tropes when you're forgiving something like "I hope you die instead of becoming a terrifying creature of the night, feasting on the flesh of innocents."

quote:

He laughed, exuberant with relief. �Come down to see me,� he begged. �I want to make it up to you.�

I frowned. �How?�

�Anything you want. Cliff diving,� he suggested, laughing again.

�Oh, there�s a brilliant idea.�

�I�ll keep you safe,� he promised. �No matter what you want to do.�

I glanced at Edward. His face was very calm, but I was sure this was not the time.

�Not right now.�

�He�s not thrilled with me, is he?� Jacob�s voice was ashamed, rather than bitter, for once.

�That�s not the problem. There�s� well, there�s this other problem that�s slightly more worrisome than a bratty teenage werewolf.�� I tried to keep my tone joking, but I didn�t fool him.

�What�s wrong?� he demanded.

�Um.� I wasn�t sure what I should tell him.

Edward held his hand out for the phone. I looked at his face carefully. He seemed calm enough.

He's going to eat the phone.

quote:

�Bella?� Jacob asked.

Edward sighed, holding his hand closer.

�Do you mind speaking to Edward?� I asked apprehensively. �He wants to talk to you.�

There was a long pause.

�Okay,� Jacob finally agreed. �This should be interesting.�

I handed the phone to Edward; I hoped he could read the warning in my eyes.

�Hello, Jacob,� Edward said, perfectly polite.

There was a silence. I bit my lip, trying to guess how Jacob would answer.

�Someone was here�not a scent I know,� Edward explained. �Has your pack come across anything new?�

Another pause, while Edward nodded to himself, unsurprised.

�Here�s the crux, Jacob. I won�t be letting Bella out of my sight till I get this taken care of. It�s nothing personal��

Jacob interrupted him then, and I could hear the buzz of his voice from the receiver. Whatever he was saying, he was more intense than before. I tried unsuccessfully to make out the words.

�You might be right�,� Edward began, but Jacob was arguing again. Neither of them sounded angry, at least.

�That�s an interesting suggestion. We�re quite willing to renegotiate. If Sam is amenable.�

Jacob�s voice was quieter now. I started chewing on my thumbnail as I tried to read Edward�s expression.

�Thank you,� Edward replied.

Then Jacob said something that caused a surprised expression to flicker across Edward�s face.

�I�d planned to go alone, actually,� Edward said, answering the unexpected question. �And leave her with the others.�

Jacob�s voice rose in pitch, and it sounded to me like he was trying to be persuasive.

�I�ll try to consider it objectively,� Edward promised. �As objectively as I�m capable of.�

Which isn't very.

quote:

The pause was shorter this time.

�That�s not a half-bad idea. When?� No, that�s fine. I�d like a chance to follow the trail personally, anyway. Ten minutes� Certainly,� Edward said. He held the phone out to me. �Bella?�

I took it slowly, feeling confused.

�What was that all about?� I asked Jacob, my voice peeved. I knew it was juvenile, but I felt excluded.

�A truce, I think. Hey, do me a favor,� Jacob suggested. �Try to convince your bloodsucker that the safest place for you to be�especially when he leaves�is on the reservation. We�re well able to handle anything.�

�Is that what you were trying to sell him?�

�Yes. It makes sense. Charlie�s probably better off here, too. As much as possible.�

�Get Billy on it,� I agreed. I hated that I was putting Charlie within the range of the crosshairs that always seemed to be centered on me. �What else?�

�Just rearranging some boundaries, so we can catch anyone who gets too near Forks. I�m not sure if Sam will go for it, but until he comes around, I�ll keep an eye on things.�

It would work better if you could keep Paul from staring at the boundary waiting for the first excuse to massacre everyone on his side.

quote:

�What do you mean by �keep an eye on things�?�

�I mean that if you see a wolf running around your house, don�t shoot at it.�

�Of course not. You really shouldn�t do anything� risky, though.�

He snorted. �Don�t be stupid. I can take care of myself.�

I sighed.

�I also tried to convince him to let you visit. He�s prejudiced, so don�t let him give you any crap about safety. He knows as well as I do that you�d be safe here.�

�I�ll keep that in mind.�

�See you in a few,� Jacob said.

�You�re coming up?�

�Yeah. I�m going to get the scent of your visitor so we can track him if he comes back.�

�Jake, I really don�t like the idea of you tracking��

�Oh please, Bella,� he interrupted. Jacob laughed, and then hung up.

# ? Dec 30, 2019 17:21

Midjack: Dec 24, 2007

chitoryu12 posted:

What kind of loving description of Bella is that? "Divine?�

Big John Waters fan.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Divine_(performer)

# ? Dec 30, 2019 17:45

HopperUK: Apr 29, 2007; Why would an ambulance be leaving the hospital?

She's riffing on 'to err is human, to forgive divine' but it misses the mark pretty badly.

# ? Dec 31, 2019 02:54

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

Chapter 10: Scent

quote:

It was all very childish. Why on Earth should Edward have to leave for Jacob to come over? Weren�t we past this kind of immaturity?

If we were, Meyer wouldn't be able to write a plot.

quote:

�It�s not that I feel any personal antagonism toward him, Bella, it�s just easier for both of us,� Edward told me at the door. �I won�t be far away. You�ll be safe.�

�I�m not worried about that.�

He smiled, and then a sly look came into his eye. He pulled me close, burying his face in my hair. I could feel his cool breath saturate the strands as he exhaled; it raised goose bumps on my neck.

�I�ll be right back,� he said, and then he laughed aloud as if I�d just told a good joke.

�What�s so funny?�

But Edward just grinned and loped off toward the trees without answering.

quote:

Grumbling to myself, I went to clean up the kitchen. Before I even had the sink full of water, the doorbell rang. It was hard to get used to how much faster Jacob was without his car. How everyone seemed to be so much faster than me.�

�Come in, Jake!� I shouted.

I was concentrating on piling the dishes into the bubbly water, and I�d forgotten that Jacob moved like a ghost these days. So it made me jump when his voice was suddenly there behind me.

�Should you really leave your door unlocked like that? Oh, sorry.�

I�d slopped myself with the dishwater when he�d startled me. �I�m not worried about anyone who would be deterred by a locked door,� I said while I wiped the front of my shirt with a dishtowel.

Forks is the only zero-crime town in the United States.

quote:

�Good point,� he agreed.

I turned to look at him, eyeing him critically. �Is it really so impossible to wear clothes, Jacob?� I asked. Once again, Jacob was bare-chested, wearing nothing but a pair of old cut-off jeans. Secretly, I wondered if he was just so proud of his new muscles that he couldn�t stand to cover them up. I had to admit, they were impressive�but I�d never thought of him as vain. �I mean, I know you don�t get cold anymore, but still.�

Stop mocking the poor, Bella.

quote:

He ran a hand through his wet hair; it was falling in his eyes.

�It�s just easier,� he explained.

�What�s easier?�

He smiled condescendingly. �It�s enough of a pain to carry the shorts around with me, let alone a complete outfit. What do I look like, a pack mule?�

I frowned. �What are you talking about, Jacob?�

His expression was superior, like I was missing something obvious. �My clothes don�t just pop in and out of existence when I change�I have to carry them with me while I run. Pardon me for keeping my burden light.�

I changed color. �I guess I didn�t think about that,� I muttered.

He laughed and pointed to a black leather cord, thin as a strand of yarn, that was wound three times below his left calf like an anklet. I hadn�t noticed before that his feet were bare, too. �That�s more than just a fashion statement�it sucks to carry jeans in your mouth.�

I didn�t know what to say to that.

Is he just...strapping his pants to his wolf body?

quote:

He grinned. �Does my being half-naked bother you?�

�No.�

Jacob laughed again, and I turned my back on him to focus on the dishes. I hoped he realized my blush was left over from embarrassment at my own stupidity, and had nothing to do with his question.

�Well, I suppose I should get to work.� He sighed. �I wouldn�t want to give him an excuse to say I�m slacking on my side.�

�Jacob, it�s not your job��

He raised a hand to cut me off. �I�m working on a volunteer basis here. Now, where is the intruder�s scent the worst?�

�My bedroom, I think.�

His eyes narrowed. He didn�t like that any more than Edward had. �I�ll just be a minute.�

I methodically scrubbed the plate I was holding. The only sound was the brush�s plastic bristles scraping round and round on the ceramic. I listened for something from above, a creak of the floorboard, the click of a door. There was nothing. I realized I�d been cleaning the same plate far longer than necessary, and I tried to pay attention to what I was doing.

She's like an NPC bartender wiping a glass endlessly during a conversation.

quote:

�Whew!� Jacob said, inches behind me, scaring me again.

�Yeesh, Jake, cut that out!�

�Sorry. Here�� Jacob took the towel and mopped up my new spill. �I�ll make it up to you. You wash, I�ll rinse and dry.�

�Fine.� I gave him the plate.

�Well, the scent was easy enough to catch. By the way, your room reeks.�

�I�ll buy some air freshener.�

He laughed.

I washed and he dried in companionable silence for a few minutes.

�Can I ask you something?�

I handed him another plate. �That depends on what you want to know.�

�I�m not trying to be a jerk or anything�I�m honestly curious,� Jacob assured me.

�Fine. Go ahead.�

He paused for half a second. �What�s it like�having a vampire for a boyfriend?�

I rolled my eyes. �It�s the best.�

�I�m serious. The idea doesn�t bother you�it never creeps you out?�

�Never.�

It should!

quote:

He was silent as he reached for the bowl in my hands. I peeked up at his face�he was frowning, his lower lip jutting out.

�Anything else?� I asked.

He wrinkled his nose again. �Well� I was wondering� do you� y�know, kiss him?�

I laughed. �Yes.�

He shuddered. �Ugh.�

�To each her own,� I murmured.

She has a Greek statue fetish.

quote:

�You don�t worry about the fangs?�

I smacked his arm, splashing him with dishwater. �Shut up, Jacob! You know he doesn�t have fangs!�

�Close enough,� he muttered.

I gritted my teeth and scrubbed a boning knife with more force than necessary.

And immediately sliced four fingers off?

quote:

�Can I ask another one?� he asked softly when I passed the knife to him. �Just curious, again.�

�Fine,� I snapped.

He turned the knife over and over in his hands under the stream of water. When he spoke, it was only a whisper. �You said a few weeks.� When, exactly�?� He couldn�t finish.

�Graduation,� I whispered back, watching his face warily. Would this set him off again?

�So soon,� he breathed, his eyes closing. It didn�t sound like a question. It sounded like a lament. The muscles in his arms tightened and his shoulders were stiff.

�OW!� he shouted; it had gotten so still in the room that I jumped a foot in the air at his outburst.

His right hand had curled into a tense fist around the blade of the knife�he unclenched his hand and the knife clattered onto the counter. Across his palm was a long, deep gash. The blood streamed down his fingers and dripped on the floor.

�drat it! Ouch!� he complained.

No! That's the wrong person to do that!

quote:

My head spun and my stomach rolled. I clung to the countertop with one hand, took a deep breath through my mouth, and forced myself to get a grip so that I could take care of him.

�Oh, no, Jacob! Oh, crap! Here, wrap this around it!� I shoved the dish towel at him, reaching for his hand.

He shrugged away from me.

�It�s nothing, Bella, don�t worry about it.�

The room started to shimmer a little around the edges.

I took another deep breath. �Don�t worry?! You sliced your hand open!�

He ignored the dish towel I pushed at him. He put his hand under the faucet and let the water wash over the wound. The water ran red. My head whirled.

�Bella,� he said.

I looked away from the wound, up to his face. He was frowning, but his expression was calm.

�What?�

�You look like you�re going to pass out, and you�re biting your lip off. Stop it. Relax. Breathe. I�m fine.�

Ah, the faintness when around blood has finally returned after a pointed absence. It matters just as much as it always does.

quote:

I inhaled through my mouth and removed my teeth from my lower lip. �Don�t be brave.�

He rolled his eyes.

�Let�s go. I�ll drive you to the ER.� I was pretty sure I would be okay to drive. The walls were holding steady now, at least.

�Not necessary.� Jake turned off the water and took the towel from my hand. He twisted it loosely around his palm.

�Wait,� I protested. �Let me look at it.� I clutched the counter more firmly, to hold myself upright if the wound made me woozy again.

�Do you have a medical degree that you never told me about?�

�Just give me the chance to decide whether or not I�m going to throw a fit over taking you to the hospital.�

He made a face of mock horror. �Please, not a fit!�

Don't laugh. Normally her fits end with her self-harming or crashing her car into yours on purpose.

quote:

�If you don�t let me see your hand, a fit is guaranteed.�

He inhaled deeply, and then let out a gusty sigh. �Fine.�

He unwound the towel and, when I reached out to take the cloth, he laid his hand in mine.

It took me a few seconds. I even flipped his hand over, though I was sure he�d cut his palm. I turned his hand back up, finally realizing that the angry pink, puckered line was all that was left of his wound.

�But� you were bleeding� so much.�

He pulled his hand back, his eyes steady and somber on mine.

�I heal fast.�

�I�ll say,� I mouthed.

I�d seen the long gash clearly, seen the blood that flowed into the sink. The rust-and-salt smell of it had almost pulled me under. It should have needed stitches. It should have taken days to scab over and then weeks to fade into the shiny pink scar that marked his skin now.

He screwed his mouth up into half a smile and thumped his fist once against his chest. �Werewolf, remember?�

Wait, we already covered werewolf healing abilities in an earlier chapter. Why do we need to redo this with two pages of Bella agonizing over it?

quote:

His eyes held mine for an immeasurable moment.

�Right,� I finally said.

He laughed at my expression. �I told you this. You saw Paul�s scar.�

I shook my head to clear it. �It�s a little different, seeing the action sequence firsthand.�

But completely pointless since we already knew about it!

quote:

I kneeled down and dug the bleach out of the cabinet under the sink. Then I poured some on a dusting rag and started scrubbing the floor. The burning scent of the bleach cleared the last of the dizziness from my head.

�Let me clean up,� Jacob said.

�I got this. Throw that towel in the wash, will you?�

When I was sure the floor smelled of nothing but bleach, I got up and rinsed the right side of the sink with bleach, too. Then I went to the laundry closet beside the pantry, and poured a cupful into the washing machine before starting it. Jacob watched me with a disapproving look on his face.

�Do you have obsessive-compulsive disorder?� he asked when I was done.

*ticks off another box*

quote:

Huh. Maybe. But at least I had a good excuse this time. �We�re a bit sensitive to blood around here. I�m sure you can understand that.�

�Oh.� He wrinkled his nose again.

�Why not make it as easy as possible for him? What he�s doing is hard enough.�

�Sure, sure. Why not?�

I pulled the plug, and let the dirty water drain from the sink.

�Can I ask you something, Bella?�

I sighed.

�What�s it like�having a werewolf for a best friend?�

The question caught me off guard. I laughed out loud.

�Does it creep you out?� he pressed before I could answer.

�No. When the werewolf is being nice,� I qualified, �it�s the best.�

"When he and his friends are going into murderous werewolf rages and cutting themselves in my kitchen, not so much."

quote:

He grinned widely, his teeth bright against his russet skin. �Thanks, Bella,� he said, and then he grabbed my hand and wrenched me into one of his bone-crushing hugs.

Before I had time to react, he dropped his arms and stepped away.

�Ugh,� he said, his nose wrinkling. �Your hair stinks worse than your room.�

�Sorry,� I muttered. I suddenly understood what Edward had been laughing about earlier, after breathing on me.

A love triangle based entirely around heavy breathing on the girl and projecting images into a vampire's mind to taunt him.

quote:

�One of the many hazards of socializing with vampires,� Jacob said, shrugging. �It makes you smell bad. A minor hazard, comparatively.�

I glared at him. �I only smell bad to you, Jake.�

He grinned. �See you around, Bells.�

�Are you leaving?�

�He�s waiting for me to go. I can hear him outside.�

�Oh.�

�I�ll go out the back,� he said, and then he paused. �Hold up a sec�hey, do you think you can come to La Push tonight? We�re having a bonfire party. Emily will be there, and you could meet Kim� And I know Quil wants to see you, too. He�s pretty peeved that you found out before he did.�

I grinned at that. I could just imagine how that would have irked Quil�Jacob�s little human gal pal down with the werewolves while he was still clueless. And then I sighed. �Yeah, Jake, I don�t know about that. See, it�s a little tense right now.��

�C�mon, you think somebody�s going to get past all�all six of us?�

There was a strange pause as he stuttered over the end of his question. I wondered if he had trouble saying the word werewolf aloud, the way I often had difficulty with vampire.

Except earlier when he had absolutely no trouble at any point? And was in fact bragging about all the benefits of being a werewolf?

quote:

His big dark eyes were full of unashamed pleading.

�I�ll ask,� I said doubtfully.

He made a noise in the back of his throat. �Is he your warden, now, too? You know, I saw this story on the news last week about controlling, abusive teenage relationships and��

�Okay!� I cut him off, and then shoved his arm. �Time for the werewolf to get out!�

He grinned. �Bye, Bells. Be sure you ask permission.�

He ducked out the back door before I could find something to throw at him. I growled incoherently at the empty room.

Okay, what the gently caress? This isn't even the first time Meyer has treated outright abuse as humorous, but now she's even having the characters calling it out for what it is being a joke? What the hell is wrong with her?

quote:

Seconds after he was gone, Edward walked slowly into the kitchen, raindrops glistening like diamonds set into the bronze of his hair. His eyes were wary.

�Did you two get into a fight?� he asked.

�Edward!� I sang, throwing myself at him.

�Hi, there.� He laughed and wrapped his arms around me. �Are you trying to distract me? It�s working.�

�No, I didn�t fight with Jacob. Much. Why?�

�I was just wondering why you stabbed him. Not that I object.� With his chin, he gestured to the knife on the counter.

�Dang! I thought I got everything.�

Edward didn't even loving question it. Saw a bloody knife and immediately assumed one of them must have been stabbing the other.

quote:

I pulled away from him and ran to put the knife in the sink before I doused it with bleach.

�I didn�t stab him,� I explained as I worked. �He forgot he had a knife in his hand.�

Edward chuckled. �That�s not nearly as fun as the way I imagined it.�

�Be nice.�

He took a big envelope from his jacket pocket and tossed it on the counter. �I got your mail.�

�Anything good?�

�I think so.�

My eyes narrowed suspiciously at his tone. I went to investigate. He�d folded the legal-sized envelope in half. I smoothed it open, surprised at the weight of the expensive paper, and read the return address.

�Dartmouth? Is this a joke?�

�I�m sure it�s an acceptance. It looks exactly like mine.�

�Good grief, Edward�what did you do?�

�I sent in your application, that�s all.�

�I may not be Dartmouth material, but I�m not stupid enough to believe that.�

�Dartmouth seems to think that you�re Dartmouth material.�

Yeah, I actually am questioning that. We've barely seen anything of Bella's schoolwork except for a few offhand remarks in her junior year about having already done the work in Phoenix, which says more about Forks than Bella's supposed intelligence. She's often surprisingly dim, in fact.

quote:

I took a deep breath and counted slowly to ten. �That�s very generous of them,� I finally said. �However, accepted or not, there is still the minor matter of tuition. I can�t afford it, and I�m not letting you throw away enough money to buy yourself another sports car just so that I can pretend to go to Dartmouth next year.�

�I don�t need another sports car. And you don�t have to pretend anything,� he murmured. �One year of college wouldn�t kill you. Maybe you�d even like it. Just think about it, Bella. Imagine how excited Charlie and Ren�e would be.��

His velvet voice painted the picture in my head before I could block it. Of course Charlie would explode with pride�no one in the town of Forks would be able to escape the fallout from his excitement. And Ren�e would be hysterical with joy at my triumph�though she�d swear she wasn�t at all surprised.�

It says a lot about how this is written. One of the few times Bella shows anything but disdain toward her father, it's at the thought of him celebrating her achievements. It's not actually about him, it's all about her.

quote:

I tried to shake the image out of my head. �Edward. I�m worried about living through graduation, let alone this summer or next fall.�

His arms wrapped around me again. �No one is going to hurt you. You have all the time in the world.�

I sighed. �I�m mailing the contents of my bank account to Alaska tomorrow. It�s all the alibi I need. It�s far enough away that Charlie won�t expect a visit until Christmas at the earliest. And I�m sure I�ll think of some excuse by then. You know,� I teased halfheartedly, �this whole secrecy and deception thing is kind of a pain.�

Edward�s expression hardened. �It gets easier. After a few decades, everyone you know is dead. Problem solved.�

I flinched.

"Sorry, that was harsh."

If you didn't know anything about this series, you'd swear that it was leading up to Bella deciding not to become a vampire.

quote:

I stared down at the big white envelope, not seeing it. �But still true.�

�If I get this resolved, whatever it is we�re dealing with, will you please consider waiting?�

�Nope.�

�Always so stubborn.�

�Yep.�

The washing machine thumped and stuttered to a halt. �Stupid piece of junk,� I muttered as I pulled away from him. I moved the one small towel that had unbalanced the otherwise empty machine, and started it again.

�This reminds me,� I said. �Could you ask Alice what she did with my stuff when she cleaned my room? I can�t find it anywhere.�

He looked at me with confused eyes. �Alice cleaned your room?�

"Normally she's more into destroying them."

quote:

�Yeah, I guess that�s what she was doing. When she came to get my pajamas and pillow and stuff to hold me hostage.� I glowered at him briefly. �She picked up everything that was lying around, my shirts, my socks, and I don�t know where she put them.�

Edward continued to look confused for one short moment, and then, abruptly, he was rigid.

�When did you notice your things were missing?�

�When I got back from the fake slumber party. Why?�

�I don�t think Alice took anything. Not your clothes, or your pillow. The things that were taken, these were things you�d worn� and touched� and slept on?�

�Yes. What is it, Edward?�

His expression was strained. �Things with your scent.�

�Oh!�

We stared into each other�s eyes for a long moment.

�My visitor,� I muttered.

�He was gathering traces� evidence. To prove that he�d found you?�

�Why?� I whispered.

�I don�t know. But, Bella, I swear I will find out. I will.�

�I know you will,� I said, laying my head against his chest. Leaning there, I felt his phone vibrate in his pocket.

Again, how does such a dramatic moment come off so dull and lifeless? Any other writer would make this the big reveal that ends the chapter, but Bella just sort of goes "Oh well" and forgets about it.

quote:

He pulled out his phone and glanced at the number. �Just the person I need to talk to,� he murmured, and then he flipped it open. �Carlisle, I�� He broke off and listened, his face taut with concentration for a few minutes. �I�ll check it out. Listen��

He explained about my missing things, but from the side I was hearing, it sounded like Carlisle had no insights for us.

�Maybe I�ll go�,� Edward said, trailing off as his eyes drifted toward me. �Maybe not. Don�t let Emmett go alone, you know how he gets. At least ask Alice to keep an eye on things. We�ll figure this out later.�

What did Emmett do?

quote:

He snapped the phone shut. �Where�s the paper?� he asked me.

�Um, I�m not sure. Why?�

�I need to see something. Did Charlie already throw it out?�

�Maybe.��

Edward disappeared. He was back in half a second, new diamonds in his hair, a wet newspaper in his hands. He spread it out on the table, his eyes scanning quickly across the headlines. He leaned in, intent on something he was reading, one finger tracing passages that interested him most.

Half a second? Edward is zipping around like the loving Roadrunner!

quote:

�Carlisle�s right� yes� very sloppy. Young and crazed? Or a death wish?� he muttered to himself.

I went to peek over his shoulder.

The headline of the Seattle Times read: �Murder Epidemic Continues�Police Have No New Leads.�

It was almost the same story Charlie had been complaining about a few weeks ago�the big-city violence that was pushing Seattle up the national murder hot-spot list. It wasn�t exactly the same story, though. The numbers were a lot higher.

�It�s getting worse,� I murmured.

He frowned. �Altogether out of control. This can�t be the work of just one newborn vampire. What�s going on? It�s as if they�ve never heard of the Volturi. Which is possible, I guess. No one has explained the rules to them� so who is creating them, then?�

�The Volturi?� I repeated, shuddering.

�This is exactly the kind of thing they routinely wipe out�immortals who threaten to expose us. They just cleaned up a mess like this a few years ago in Atlanta, and it hadn�t gotten nearly this bad. They will intervene soon, very soon, unless we can find some way to calm the situation. I�d really rather they didn�t come to Seattle just now. As long as they�re this close� they might decide to check on you.�

Oh no! Atlanta is the 9th best city to be a vampire!

quote:

I shuddered again. �What can we do?�

�We need to know more before we can decide that. Perhaps if we can talk to these young ones, explain the rules, it can be resolved peacefully.� He frowned, like he didn�t think the chances of that were good. �We�ll wait until Alice has an idea of what�s going on.� We don�t want to step in until it�s absolutely necessary. After all, it�s not our responsibility. But it�s good we have Jasper,� he added, almost to himself. �If we are dealing with newborns, he�ll be helpful.�

�Jasper? Why?�

Edward smiled darkly. �Jasper is sort of an expert on young vampires.�

�What do you mean, an expert?�

�You�ll have to ask him�the story is involved.�

He's the only one whose tragic backstory we haven't unlocked!

quote:

�What a mess,� I mumbled.

�It does feel that way, doesn�t it? Like it�s coming at us from all sides these days.� He sighed. �Do you ever think that your life might be easier if you weren�t in love with me?�

�Maybe. It wouldn�t be much of a life, though.�

�For me,� he amended quietly. �And now, I suppose,� he continued with a wry smile, �you have something you want to ask me?�

I stared at him blankly. �I do?�

�Or maybe not.� He grinned. �I was rather under the impression that you�d promised to ask my permission to go to some kind of werewolf soir�e tonight.�

�Eavesdropping again?�

He grinned. �Just a bit, at the very end.�

"I can hear every noise for miles. I'm physically incapable of not eavesdropping."

quote:

�Well, I wasn�t going to ask you anyway. I figured you had enough to stress about.�

He put his hand under my chin, and held my face so that he could read my eyes. �Would you like to go?�

�It�s no big thing. Don�t worry about it.�

�You don�t have to ask my permission, Bella. I�m not your father�thank heaven for that. Perhaps you should ask Charlie, though.�

�But you know Charlie will say yes.�

�I do have a bit more insight into his probable answer than most people would, it�s true.�

"I violate everyone's privacy all the time! It's the only way I can socialize!"

quote:

I just stared at him, trying to understand what he wanted, and trying to put out of my mind the yearning I felt to go to La Push so that I wouldn�t be swayed by my own wishes. It was stupid to want to go hang out with a bunch of big idiot wolf-boys right now when there was so much that was frightening and unexplained going on. Of course, that was exactly why I wanted to go. I wanted to escape the death threats, for just a few hours� to be the less-mature, more-reckless Bella who could laugh it off with Jacob, if only briefly. But that didn�t matter.

�Bella,� Edward said. �I told you that I was going to be reasonable and trust your judgment. I meant that. If you trust the werewolves, then I�m not going to worry about them.�

�Wow,� I said, as I had last night.

Just remember that at any time he can rescind this and you can't do anything!

quote:

�And Jacob�s right�about one thing, anyway�a pack of werewolves ought to be enough to protect even you for one evening.�

�Are you sure?�

�Of course. Only��

I braced myself.

�I hope you won�t mind taking a few precautions? Allowing me to drive you to the boundary line, for one. And then taking a cell phone, so that I�ll know when to pick you up?�

�That sounds� very reasonable.�

�Excellent.�

He smiled at me, and I could see no trace of apprehension in his jewel-like eyes.

Chapter break.

# ? Dec 31, 2019 18:29

Lord Zedd-Repulsa: Jul 21, 2007; Devour a good book.

How does everyone else in Forks not wonder why the Cullens' eyes alternate between being nearly black and being their usual color -- do they just think everyone's wearing contacts?

# ? Jan 2, 2020 06:32

Dawgstar: Jul 15, 2017

Lord Zedd-Repulsa posted:

How does everyone else in Forks not wonder why the Cullens' eyes alternate between being nearly black and being their usual color -- do they just think everyone's wearing contacts?

I think the implication is people are too focused on how distant/dreamy/inscrutable the Cullens are to notice them being vampire weird instead of normal weird.

# ? Jan 2, 2020 10:43

SUPERMAN'S GAL PAL: Feb 21, 2006; Holy Moly! DARKSEID IS!

For a moment I thought they wore contacts to blend in, but then I remembered Meyer made a post on one of the old fan forums where she explained how her vampires have �venom� that�s overridden every fluid type in their body and it would dissolve contacts. I could be remembering the contact part wrong, but I swear the venom itself is totally true, including the detail that it�s highly flammable.

# ? Jan 2, 2020 16:47

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# ? May 23, 2024 23:06

Victorkm: Nov 25, 2001

Seems correct, you see how fast a vampire goes up if you light them on fire multiple times in the books and movies. That explains why since you wouldn't think rock skin would burn super fast.

# ? Jan 3, 2020 05:24

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