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Is killed in a standoff with police after reports of a deranged man with a gun roaming a national park are phoned in by tourists.
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 06:11 |
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# ? May 13, 2024 07:31 |
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Died of carbon monoxide poisoning during a Star Wars marathon because I hosed up my diy underground bunker's ventilation system
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 07:17 |
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I told you so
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 07:19 |
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Runs out of wine Dies
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 07:57 |
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*Is hunted down and killed for my supplies, 'cos it turns out in a survival situation, people with existing strong social networks do better than weirdo loners*
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 09:16 |
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*attempts to fjord the river*
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 09:29 |
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Who What Now posted:*has been dead for 4 years, 362 days*
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 10:21 |
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I'm at a stand still in the middle of a rubble strewn, burned out city in a red Volvo sitting motionless behind a several mile long procession of desiccated, ruined vehicles with dead, ashen, and skeletal drivers at their rusted wheels. I blast my La Cucaracha horn and scream "MOVE!!! MOVE!!! GET THE gently caress OUT THE WAY SOME OF US GOT PLACES TO BE!!"
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 11:53 |
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ftzVLc4JiDU&t=366s
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 12:01 |
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Squatting in a pine forest, the only sound being the unmistakable roar of cars on a busy thoroughway nearby. Or so it would seem.... that's how they trick you.
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 12:25 |
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*Is a corpse hanging from a tree forlornly overlooking a compound that was looted by a well organised commune of normies*
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 12:34 |
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*stares out over the broken remains of society* "OBAMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! You son of a bitch, JADE HELM! JADE HELM! I KNEW WHAT IT WAS ALL ALONG!"
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 12:50 |
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Stockpiling toilet paper and printouts of internet porn for use as the new currency.
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 13:14 |
*didn't store the water right and now has to collect more, gets some from a lake because "it's so clear, you don't get germs from clear water" and proceeds to poop self to death*
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 13:16 |
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Clark Nova posted:It's just another one of those tendencies that ended up being a cover for/outgrowth of extreme racism. A society with those people in it is surely going to collapse any day now And when it doesn't collapse, they actively try to destroy it by electing guys like Trump because society is only good so long as it panders to white men. Once it starts pandering to other demographics as well, it has to be burned to the ground.
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 13:23 |
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*is burning foxfire books to keep warm during a super mega ultra polar vortex event*
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 14:54 |
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The sky has been so dark for so long that I've lost all track of day and night. I rummage for hours looking for the bug-out bag I had hidden and my hands are raw. The ringing in my left ear has dwindled and now I can't hear anything at all from that side. I sleep when I'm tired but I can't sleep for long because I don't feel safe in this empty apartment complex. When I wake, I vaguely recall fitful dreams of caramel macchiato.
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 15:48 |
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epic bird guy posted:do people even do prepping anymore? seems like its no longer in the zeitgeist imo There are a couple of prepper stores near me. They're full of AR15's, buckets of grains and beans, MRE's, heirloom seeds, and survival books. There are actually lot cool things in them and it would be fun to shop, but they are full of the worst people talking loudly about horrible poo poo. I wouldn't mind growing some purple and white tomatoes and shooting that weird slingshot that launches arrows they they had.
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 15:56 |
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Can't wait til Thursday when it's my turn to sleep with the porno magazine
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 16:12 |
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Sure Bush is a piece of poo poo but I'm not convinced this Clinton guy will be any better. Ait time to plant more corn.
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 16:21 |
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Didn’t realize gasoline goes bad. Generator stopped working and now my truck won’t start. Stuck in the woods 34 miles of mountain terrain from anywhere I could salvage supplies. I have a toothache and I think it’s getting infected, I can feel my lymph nodes swell up and it’s getting hard to swallow. Used the last of my antibiotics when the rats bit me. Plenty of bullets though, so that’s good.
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 16:51 |
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Generators shut down today, way ahead of schedule. While I knew the temperature systems of my massive, 1000sqft freezer would be high, I must have miscalculated. As it is, my 1-year supply of beef cuts will have only lasted me 3 months. Should I have listened to those soyboys who told me to stockpile dry beans and grains, instead of energy-intensive, calorie-inefficient foods like beef, pork, and bacon? No. America will not be rebuilt with beans and rice. My only goal now is to keep the emergency generator alive as long as possible, so at least my chest freezer of bull semen stays fresh. I will repopulate the herds, God as my witness.
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 17:10 |
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 17:11 |
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 17:13 |
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It's been five long years since the collapse of civilization. Wish I remembered to get a copy of the camping chili recipe. I have no idea what the gently caress to do with all this powdered french onion.
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 17:48 |
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I'm sorry, but what is your goddamn point?? We wouldn't be posting here if we all hadn't survived Y2K, so I think it's safe to say that all our preparations paid the gently caress off!
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 18:07 |
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Icochet posted:Can't wait til Thursday when it's my turn to sleep with the porno magazine I hear pages 12 and 17 are still relatively pristine! Is it fueled by children or only operated by them?
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 18:07 |
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Still can't get laid.
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 18:27 |
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davidspackage posted:Is it fueled by children or only operated by them? An open question for any machinery coming out of China TBH.
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 18:30 |
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The Bramble posted:I'm sorry, but what is your goddamn point?? We wouldn't be posting here if we all hadn't survived Y2K, so I think it's safe to say that all our preparations paid the gently caress off! Oh have we? You fool!! The next Y2K could be just around the corner!!
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 18:30 |
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All the women insisted on being left behind. They're still there. In the town. Pretending the apocalypse didn't happen. Continuing their lives like everything was fine. I pity them. loving bitches.
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 18:31 |
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Chillin. Waiting for the CVS to be clear and get whatever's left. Hey little kitty you look delicious. Hey Mr. Squirrel what's for dinner You are? OK. Yo buddy get on the loving ground and give me all your supplies before I blow your brains out. Peace, brother. (Get's enslaved by roaming gangs)
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 18:31 |
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If anyone is interested, I've posted lots of survival/ soldier of fortune/ doomsday prepper stuff in the magazine thread: https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3887842&userid=0&perpage=40&pagenumber=24
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 18:36 |
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*writes 'im gay' on the walls of my compound to attract looters for my rear end*
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 18:37 |
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$55 for a .45?! Sign me the gently caress up!!
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 18:41 |
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wastelanders opening my prepper vault to find my skeleton and an audio recording of me making GBS threads myself to death aftering eating my 3 year supply of beans in a week.
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 18:44 |
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<hasn't been to the bugout cabin since the 2017 election (Trump won't let anything bad happen during his time in office) so no rush> <Trump is impeached, Dems take power> <over 1/50th of the Democrats are people of colour (sign of the end of days)> <rushes out to bugout cabin with some fresh supplies> <starts dusting and cleaning, beating out blankets and clothes, sweeping floors, cleaning windows, removing cobwebs, etc.> <drat mice have been busy in here, they ate all the poison years ago, so there was nothing left to kill the newer batches> <mice crap everywhere, stupid little buggers. Wish I had a vacuum cleaner here, oh well, just keep sweeping and dusting> <should have brought a mask, this dust is burning my nose and throat> . . . <three weeks later> <succumbs to hantavirus>
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 19:19 |
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Gutter Phoenix posted:Oh have we? I apologize for my strong and aggressive reaction earlier. While I have fortified my bunker, I have yet to fortify the weakest chink in my armor: my egotistic inability to accept any criticism, real or imagined, about the things that I think are important. As my therapist keeps reminding me, it doesn't matter how much peanut butter powder I stockpile to keep my body healthy, if I don't also stockpile self-esteem too I'll never be happy.
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 19:26 |
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*gnaws on own foot in the forlorn cabin* Mmm the diabetes makes it sweeter
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 19:29 |
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# ? May 13, 2024 07:31 |
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The Bramble posted:I apologize for my strong and aggressive reaction earlier. While I have fortified my bunker, I have yet to fortify the weakest chink in my armor: my egotistic inability to accept any criticism, real or imagined, about the things that I think are important. As my therapist keeps reminding me, it doesn't matter how much peanut butter powder I stockpile to keep my body healthy, if I don't also stockpile self-esteem too I'll never be happy. No need for apologies, friend. We are all facing Y2K2 together. If you need to build self esteem, may I suggest sending some erotic photos of yourself to Easyriders magazine?
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# ? Dec 16, 2019 19:34 |