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aphid_licker
Jan 7, 2009



gently caress those lil guys have some moves

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Flying_Crab
Apr 12, 2002



bulletsponge13 posted:

I was on a MG zero range when they called a ceasefire because an endangered butterfly flew onto the range.

I tell people this, and they think I'm making it up. People outside the military think I'm full of poo poo, that there is no way that the US military would stop training it's war machine for a single butterfly.

But it's loving true.

OTOH I’ve witnessed a deer get lit up, cooked and eaten on a 240 range before.

Mzuri
Jun 5, 2004

Who's the boss?
Dudes is lost.
Don't think coz I'm iced out,
I'm cooled off.

He has a row of dicks on the side of his technical.

Doc Hawkins
Jun 15, 2010

Dashing? But I'm not even moving!


Flying_Crab posted:

OTOH I’ve witnessed a deer get lit up, cooked and eaten on a 240 range before.

what's the opposite of protected? deer are that, i think

Nick Soapdish
Apr 27, 2008


Doc Hawkins posted:

what's the opposite of protected? deer are that, i think

Vermin

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

Flying_Crab posted:

OTOH I’ve witnessed a deer get lit up, cooked and eaten on a 240 range before.

Yeah but butterflies aren't delicious

shovelbum
Oct 21, 2010

Fun Shoe

BIG HEADLINE posted:

Photograph all the deserted strip malls with grass growing up through the parking lots.

Was just in Norfolk, the traffic is already less and poo poo it's weird I didn't have to sit in traffic at lunch rush

Fearless
Sep 3, 2003

DRINK MORE MOXIE


Doc Hawkins posted:

what's the opposite of protected? deer are that, i think

Civilians, apparently.

A Bad Poster
Sep 25, 2006
Seriously, shut the fuck up.

:dukedog:
Was on a 50 cal range with 4 guns going and they called a cease fire because some SOAR guys in a Blackhawk decided that flying directly into the line of fire at about 100' above the ground was a good idea.

Flying_Crab
Apr 12, 2002



A Bad Poster posted:

Was on a 50 cal range with 4 guns going and they called a cease fire because some SOAR guys in a Blackhawk decided that flying directly into the line of fire at about 100' above the ground was a good idea.

that's especially awesome when you see how far in the air .50 tracers ricochet off the ground

PathAsc
Nov 15, 2011

Hail SS-18 Satan may he cleanse us with nuclear fire

PISS TAPE IS REAL

We were looking for a downed drone out in/up/behind the ridges in 29. Approached one of the rifle ranges that was supposed to be cold, checked to make sure the flags weren't up. As soon as I hit the berm the rifle line began to fire.

We were told there was no training going on in the whole area and we were good to go out to recover the asset.

The Gunny (about to master) took care of it a after we hosed off away from there and radio'd in. We found the done and got back. He found the culprits and bad things happened. At least there was justice.

Icon Of Sin
Dec 26, 2008



Sounds like the bush pilots back in AK. They’d use the river as a natural navigation feature, too bad that literally every range on that base had that river as the backstop (beyond the pitiful trees that grow there). Cue panicked calls of “CEASE loving FIRE”, and a bush pilot probably flying away laughing their rear end off.

madeintaipei
Jul 13, 2012

Memento posted:

Yeah but butterflies aren't delicious

How do you know

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

madeintaipei posted:

How do you know

I mean, I was guessing, but apparently they just taste like dry toast, according to some scientists who were trying to figure out why birds wouldn't eat Monarch butterflies, and decided to rule out their flavour by taste testing them.

Which is a commitment to your discipline we should all aspire to.

My Spirit Otter
Jun 15, 2006


CANADA DOESN'T GET PENS LIKE THIS

SKILCRAFT KREW Reppin' Quality Blind Made American Products. Bitch.

Fearless posted:

Civilians, apparently.

Should've went with "Afghani weddings"

Thump!
Nov 25, 2007

Look, fat, here's the fact, Kulak!



Icon Of Sin posted:

Sounds like the bush pilots back in AK. They’d use the river as a natural navigation feature, too bad that literally every range on that base had that river as the backstop (beyond the pitiful trees that grow there). Cue panicked calls of “CEASE loving FIRE”, and a bush pilot probably flying away laughing their rear end off.

Those ranges piss me off so loving much. If it’s not bush pilots dancing along, it’s our own helicopters constantly flying directly south to get out over the flats, or it’s the dead of winter and the sun rises directly to the south and just stays on the horizon the entire time so you can’t see poo poo while you’re trying to shoot.

hawaiian_robot
Dec 5, 2006

And I'm happy just to sit here,
At a table with old friends.
And see which one of us can tell the biggest lies

Pile Of Garbage posted:

Does Australian state police ministers count for this thread? Dude's pretty loving dumb:

https://twitter.com/FocusNewsNow/status/1237048437943595009

Holding a UMP by the magazine and doing that thing where your hand is ready to get sliced by the slide flying back.

couple pages back, but he was also an australian army noble, which makes sense

Pile Of Garbage
May 28, 2007



hawaiian_robot posted:

couple pages back, but he was also an australian army noble, which makes sense

:lol: figures, no surprise.

PathAsc
Nov 15, 2011

Hail SS-18 Satan may he cleanse us with nuclear fire

PISS TAPE IS REAL

Icon Of Sin posted:

Sounds like the bush pilots back in AK. They’d use the river as a natural navigation feature, too bad that literally every range on that base had that river as the backstop (beyond the pitiful trees that grow there). Cue panicked calls of “CEASE loving FIRE”, and a bush pilot probably flying away laughing their rear end off.

I hate that this makes total sense and I can see it in my mind vividly.

MA-Horus
Dec 3, 2006

I'm sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of how awesome I am.

Flying_Crab posted:

OTOH I’ve witnessed a deer get lit up, cooked and eaten on a 240 range before.

I saw a deer take a near-direct hit from a 105 round before while on FOO party. I have no idea what that idiot deer was thinking going onto a live range, animals know better than that. We called stop as soon as we saw it but they'd already fired, so there was like 20 seconds of anticipation before seeing airborne deer bolognaise.

When I tell the story people tend to laugh and say "that's good eating"

No. There was nothing left to eat. Pretty much just red mist and bone fragments.

Wild T
Dec 15, 2008

The point I'm trying to make is that the only way to come out on top is to kick the Air Force in the nuts, beart it savagely with a weight and take a dump on it's face.
Deerly departed

PathAsc
Nov 15, 2011

Hail SS-18 Satan may he cleanse us with nuclear fire

PISS TAPE IS REAL

MA-Horus posted:

I saw a deer take a near-direct hit from a 105 round before while on FOO party. I have no idea what that idiot deer was thinking going onto a live range, animals know better than that. We called stop as soon as we saw it but they'd already fired, so there was like 20 seconds of anticipation before seeing airborne deer bolognaise.

When I tell the story people tend to laugh and say "that's good eating"

No. There was nothing left to eat. Pretty much just red mist and bone fragments.

Deer are stupid vermin for the most part tbh

aphid_licker
Jan 7, 2009


PathAsc posted:

Deer are stupid vermin for the most part tbh

Aren't we all

EBB
Feb 15, 2005

MA-Horus posted:

I saw a deer take a near-direct hit from a 105 round before while on FOO party. I have no idea what that idiot deer was thinking going onto a live range, animals know better than that. We called stop as soon as we saw it but they'd already fired, so there was like 20 seconds of anticipation before seeing airborne deer bolognaise.

When I tell the story people tend to laugh and say "that's good eating"

No. There was nothing left to eat. Pretty much just red mist and bone fragments.

We did that on accident with a 120 once. There was a deer, and then there was no deer.

Flying_Crab
Apr 12, 2002



MA-Horus posted:

I saw a deer take a near-direct hit from a 105 round before while on FOO party. I have no idea what that idiot deer was thinking going onto a live range, animals know better than that. We called stop as soon as we saw it but they'd already fired, so there was like 20 seconds of anticipation before seeing airborne deer bolognaise.

When I tell the story people tend to laugh and say "that's good eating"

No. There was nothing left to eat. Pretty much just red mist and bone fragments.

A FO once told me they saw an entire herd of deer get obliterated by arty since they pretty much live in the impact area where this occurred. They’re impossibly stupid creatures.

LibCrusher
Jan 6, 2019

by Fluffdaddy
I got in trouble for dropping a GBU-12 on a donkey that was standing in the shade of a range target

BIG HEADLINE
Jun 13, 2006

"Stand back, Ottawan ruffian, or face my lumens!"

LibCrusher posted:

I got in trouble for dropping a GBU-12 on a donkey that was standing in the shade of a range target

What an rear end.

Pile Of Garbage
May 28, 2007



LibCrusher posted:

I got in trouble for dropping a GBU-12 on a donkey that was standing in the shade of a range target

Wait, donkey's are bomb-proof?

Itchy_Grundle
Feb 22, 2003

One of the tanks in my platoon hit a deer with a training HEAT round on a Table VIII range. New gunner/TC combo was flustered and ended up shooting the first white blob they saw in the thermal.

Best part was that it was captured on through-sight video (complete with crew audio). That VHS tape made rounds for a while. You could see the deer grazing in the impact area, then the tracer arcing toward it. At the last second it looked up as if to say “huh?” before it was obliterated.

Itchy_Grundle
Feb 22, 2003

LibCrusher posted:

I got in trouble for dropping a GBU-12 on a donkey that was standing in the shade of a range target

Need to know more. This sounds funny.

PathAsc
Nov 15, 2011

Hail SS-18 Satan may he cleanse us with nuclear fire

PISS TAPE IS REAL

aphid_licker posted:

Aren't we all

I do lust for death and walking into the highway to stare into headlights does sound cool and good

MA-Horus
Dec 3, 2006

I'm sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of how awesome I am.

Flying_Crab posted:

A FO once told me they saw an entire herd of deer get obliterated by arty since they pretty much live in the impact area where this occurred. They’re impossibly stupid creatures.

:stare:

Holy gently caress how the hell did THAT happen? Normally if there's animals in the impact area the sound of the first round causes them to gently caress right off.

I mean at least it was a quick death. Deer one moment, gone the next.

CainFortea
Oct 15, 2004


Deer are stupid.

Steezo
Jun 16, 2003
Now go away, or I shall taunt you a second time!


MA-Horus posted:

:stare:

Holy gently caress how the hell did THAT happen? Normally if there's animals in the impact area the sound of the first round causes them to gently caress right off.

I mean at least it was a quick death. Deer one moment, gone the next.

At my command mission so they got a full battery at once maybe? Or just something in a 155 considering the blast radius on those. 92.5lb shell with a 50m blast radius IIRC...

D-Pad
Jun 28, 2006

Behold, hunting a deer with a 12 pound mountain howitzer:

http://www.buckstix.com/howitzer.htm

Stravag
Jun 7, 2009

quote:

But, never-the-less, if you live on the edge, and want a real hunting experience, ... read on ...
Ah yes,the hunting experience of calling fire missions in on an animal that tries to kill itself in roads and on fences and trees every day...

Vincent Van Goatse
Nov 8, 2006

Enjoy every sandwich.

Smellrose

D-Pad posted:

Behold, hunting a deer with a 12 pound mountain howitzer:

http://www.buckstix.com/howitzer.htm

I'm not sure whether this dude is brilliant or psychotic or both.

Wild T
Dec 15, 2008

The point I'm trying to make is that the only way to come out on top is to kick the Air Force in the nuts, beart it savagely with a weight and take a dump on it's face.
Another section of his site details how to build a Civil War era mortar to drop bowling balls on feral cats. And then launch feral kittens out of them

it's a joke site

PookBear
Nov 1, 2008

holding firearms by the magwell isn't really a dumb thing and was pretty common before rails and foregrips were a thing.

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aphid_licker
Jan 7, 2009


It's a bit of the gun that isn't getting hot, which must've been a concern in something like an MP40

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