TRURO 1165: I could cause panic much better than even you

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > C-SPAM > TRURO 1165: I could cause panic much better than even you

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Bulgakov: Mar 8, 2009; рукописи не горят

twoday posted:

I had to check the timeline on this and lol @ the most 1930�s story ever:

haha

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:10

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# ? May 30, 2024 05:11

triple sulk: Sep 17, 2014

twoday posted:

I had to check the timeline on this and lol @ the most 1930�s story ever:

philadelphia is the greatest city in the united states of america

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:11

2DCAT: Jun 25, 2015; pissssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss ssssssss sssssssssssssssssss sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss ssssss ssssssssssssssssssssssssssss sssssssssssssss; Gravy Boat 2k

Squinky v2.0 posted:

free covid testing for pell grant recipients who start a business that operates for three years in a disadvantaged community

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:13

Fellatio del Toro: Mar 21, 2009

Nonsense posted:

https://twitter.com/GeneforTexas/status/1238295958041100289?s=20

lol Americans stopped going to Asian markets

lets send hordes of white people into all the asian/indian/mexican groceries to buy out all their food too

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:15

dads friend steve: Dec 24, 2004

Bulgakov posted:

that led to seeing weirdo religious twitter thingers

lol gettin all mad about the papists

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:16

Bulgakov: Mar 8, 2009; рукописи не горят

Nonsense posted:

https://twitter.com/1ncognito___/status/1237832993806393344?s=20

haha lol

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:18

FAUXTON: Jun 2, 2005; spero che tu stia bene

cumshitter posted:

heres the basic rundown of what i heard from the stock guys at the office:

-huge injection of cash shows that its not a financial crisis, its a psychological one. the government isnt going to let the market freeze because of liquidity or credit issues

-you cant measure panic so who knows where the bottom is, but they think we are close

-poo poo is going to be hosed for a while because we are where china was weeks ago. events will be canceled, people will work from home

-its a virus so it will work its way through america. after that things will return to normal like china is doing now, where they are 75-80% back to normal productivity

-stock prices are leading indicators (because they are an investment in future performance) so they will rise faster than the economy reactivates

There's some deeply systemic structural poo poo that is causing math to stop working properly and my guess is that where 2008's fraud was in the dishonest risk modeling of mortgages once securitized, this crash is in the dishonest risk modeling of collateral for commercial credit lines. I wouldn't be surprised if they come out of this with big regulations on convertible debt and the usage of debt to finance stock buybacks.

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:20

Spoondick: Jun 9, 2000

dads friend steve posted:

lol gettin all mad about the papists

every once in a while at work someone goes through the parking lot and sticks a little book under the windshield wipers of each car about the pope being satan or whatever and every time im like "sweet, more paper to burn in my chimney starter"

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:20

cumshitter: Sep 27, 2005; by Fluffdaddy

plnakeys sad rear end crappy meals inspired me to share one of my charcuterie happy meals

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:21

Spoondick: Jun 9, 2000

FAUXTON posted:

There's some deeply systemic structural poo poo that is causing math to stop working properly and my guess is that where 2008's fraud was in the dishonest risk modeling of mortgages once securitized, this crash is in the dishonest risk modeling of collateral for commercial credit lines. I wouldn't be surprised if they come out of this with big regulations on convertible debt and the usage of debt to finance stock buybacks.

for some reason we don't have acurate models to predict what happens when millions die and most economic activity stops for months

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:22

dads friend steve: Dec 24, 2004

Francis KNEW

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:22

Admiral Ray: May 17, 2014; Proud Musk and Dogecoin fanboy

cumshitter posted:

plnakeys sad rear end crappy meals inspired me to share one of my charcuterie happy meals

now this is a meal

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:22

Plinkey: Aug 4, 2004; by Fluffdaddy

cumshitter posted:

plnakeys sad rear end crappy meals inspired me to share one of my charcuterie happy meals

what a horrible meal

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:24

Bulgakov: Mar 8, 2009; рукописи не горят

cumshitter posted:

plnakeys sad rear end crappy meals inspired me to share one of my charcuterie happy meals

i feel like yer trying to tell me something

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:24

Plinkey: Aug 4, 2004; by Fluffdaddy

melt some of that cheese on those crackers with meat and make some lunchable strombos

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:26

snoo: Jul 5, 2007

cumshitter posted:

plnakeys sad rear end crappy meals inspired me to share one of my charcuterie happy meals

everything flat but the cheese? what is wrong with you

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:27

snoo: Jul 5, 2007

give me that sweaty salami

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:27

twoday: May 4, 2005; C-SPAM Times best-selling author

Plinkey posted:

melt some of that cheese on those crackers with meat and make some lunchable strombos

nobody�s heating up crackers and you know it

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:27

Bilirubin: Feb 16, 2014; The sanctioned action is to CHUG

PEANUTS

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:28

Admiral Ray: May 17, 2014; Proud Musk and Dogecoin fanboy

u wrap the cheese cubes in salami and crush the cracker over them

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:28

cumshitter: Sep 27, 2005; by Fluffdaddy

snoo posted:

everything flat but the cheese? what is wrong with you

it broke up while i was cutting it

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:28

snoo: Jul 5, 2007

Admiral Ray posted:

u wrap the cheese cubes in salami and crush the cracker over them

now I got fuckin crumbs everywhere, genius

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:28

snoo: Jul 5, 2007

cumshitter posted:

it broke up while i was cutting it

oh I'm gonna break something

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:29

cumshitter: Sep 27, 2005; by Fluffdaddy

personally i love the bareley legible scrawling of "give money" contrasted with the thought of, "is munny in kingdom hearts a refernece to money?????"

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:29

Admiral Ray: May 17, 2014; Proud Musk and Dogecoin fanboy

snoo posted:

now I got fuckin crumbs everywhere, genius

yeah. delicious crumbs.

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:32

tacodaemon: Nov 27, 2006

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:32

Bulgakov: Mar 8, 2009; рукописи не горят

FAUXTON posted:

No joke the majority of this panic buying is people who are wanting to be seen buying more than the next lilyass burbroach. Go to a store that isn't one of those hugeass buy n large crate sheds and you'd think the roni never happened.

i feel like people�s internal contradiction of wanting to believe this isn�t a big deal but somewhere in their minds knowing it actually is cause for concern is resulting in this unique wack rear end behavior

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:33

VectorSigma: Jan 20, 2004; Transform
and
Freak Out

if trymp gets carobvirus and dies the chuds will just say that is him giving his life so god will save them and they will believe it and vote his corpse president for life

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:34

tacodaemon: Nov 27, 2006

https://twitter.com/ChuckTingle/status/1238237826874880000

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:36

Man Musk: Jan 13, 2010

Philthy posted:

Went to a local Walmart in WI tonight.

Every food shelf was 2/3 empty. Everything.

TP, Water, and paper towels were 99% empty. With the exception of the walmart brand paper towels that were either restocked recently or are so lovely no one wants them.

It wasn't busy around 9pm tho... Only one cashier open with almost half the store sold out. idgi

u've been visited by the spooky ghost of the average american consumer

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:38

cumshitter: Sep 27, 2005; by Fluffdaddy

FAUXTON posted:

No joke the majority of this panic buying is people who are wanting to be seen buying more than the next lilyass burbroach. Go to a store that isn't one of those hugeass buy n large crate sheds and you'd think the roni never happened.

im not panic buying im smug buying stocks and index funds. im a contrarian investor :smuggo:

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:39

VectorSigma: Jan 20, 2004; Transform
and
Freak Out

sees on news "stupid idiot morons buy all the tp"

thinks to self "hey im a stupid idiot moron!"

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:40

StrugglingHoneybun: Jan 2, 2005; Aint no thing like me, 'cept me.

If the dipshit who resets my outlook password can do it while he works from home, then i dont see why i should have to come in to the office either

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:40

BeefThief: Aug 8, 2007

cumshitter posted:

im not panic buying im smug buying stocks and index funds. im a contrarian investor

cumshitter, do you think corporate capitalism will survive the pandemic or is it in the at-risk age bracket?

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:42

Eleven Eleven: Nov 12, 2016

Nonsense posted:

https://twitter.com/GeneforTexas/status/1238295958041100289?s=20

lol Americans stopped going to Asian markets

I went to my favorite Asian market to stock up on non-perishables and snacks this last weekend and everything was well stocked compared to the Fred Meyer down the street from my house which is very under-stocked.

loving lol people are idiots.

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:42

Salt Fish: Sep 11, 2003; Cybernetic Crumb

Eleven Eleven posted:

I went to my favorite Asian market to stock up on non-perishables and snacks this last weekend and everything was well stocked compared to the Fred Meyer down the street from my house which is very under-stocked.

loving lol people are idiots.

Um... you mean Meijer's not "Meyer" you dumb idiot!!!!

# ? Mar 13, 2020 06:44