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facialimpediment
Feb 11, 2005

as the world turns
The Guardian has seen enough. Edit: Fox News too. Edit2: while Bolsonaro's son isn't making any sense and claiming fake news

https://twitter.com/Joyce_Karam/status/1238467592123117570?s=19

https://twitter.com/AaronBlake/status/1238479013661806593?s=19

Bolsonaro was hypertight with Donnie last weekend at Mar-a-Lago. It has been a few degrees away from Trump before, this one's direct.

Get better Mr. Nice!

facialimpediment fucked around with this message at 15:59 on Mar 13, 2020

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EBB
Feb 15, 2005

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Giebe-uzPFg

Proud Christian Mom
Dec 20, 2006
READING COMPREHENSION IS HARD

Carnival Rider posted:

Friend with Diabetes and a lot of health issues has a magical double pneumonia and all the corona symptoms. Can’t get a corona test because the state isn’t breaking from CDC requirement for contact with someone with it.

Number can't go up if you stop counting

Porfiriato
Jan 4, 2016


Both Trump and Pence were at Mar a Lago with the Brazilian president and are apparently refusing to be tested. I wonder if they remember that should they both be incapacitated, the next person in the line of succession is... Nancy Pelosi.

bloops
Dec 31, 2010

Thanks Ape Pussy!
Trump potentially getting Coronavirus is a beautiful twist.

Nostalgia4Butts
Jun 1, 2006

WHERE MY HOSE DRINKERS AT

mlmp08 posted:

lol is that fake, or could the XFL official account not get the blue check?

its real according to espn and stuff

not for nothing but them paying the players regardless isn't lost on me, im all for more football leagues for late draft cuts or old timers

Casimir Radon
Aug 2, 2008


Porfiriato posted:

Both Trump and Pence were at Mar a Lago with the Brazilian president and are apparently refusing to be tested. I wonder if they remember that should they both be incapacitated, the next person in the line of succession is... Nancy Pelosi.
That would be loving beautiful.

IT'S A COUP!!!!

Bulky Bartokomous
Nov 3, 2006

In Mypos, only the strong survive.

It would also explain him suddenly taking it seriously and looking and sounding like poo poo when he addressed the nation.

Don Dongington
Sep 27, 2005

#ideasboom
College Slice
I expected Russia would be getting totally boned by this thing, but according to what I've seen, they're either not testing anyone, or they were oddly responsive compared to the rest of the world :tinfoil:

Riot Carol Danvers
Jul 30, 2004

It's super dumb, but I can't stop myself. This is just kind of how I do things.

Don Dongington posted:

I expected Russia would be getting totally boned by this thing, but according to what I've seen, they're either not testing anyone, or they were oddly responsive compared to the rest of the world :tinfoil:

Which one do you think is the more likely scenario?

Casimir Radon
Aug 2, 2008


Well considering how well they're containing their HIV/AIDS problem....

Bored As Fuck
Jan 1, 2006
Fun Shoe
Putin and Xi are using the coronavirus crisis to extend their control. Across the world, Trump struggles to keep up
https://www.cnn.com/2020/03/12/world/coronavirus-russia-china-analysis-nic-robertson-intl/index.html


Also Russia has 45 confirmed cases of coronavirus so far, according to one website.

MA-Horus
Dec 3, 2006

I'm sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of how awesome I am.

Russians already have a cure for all diseases. It's a 7.62 tokarev to the base of the skull.

edit; corrected, I get a 7.62 tokarev billed to my family for dishonoring the great caliber.

MA-Horus fucked around with this message at 17:00 on Mar 13, 2020

ASAPI
Apr 20, 2007
I invented the line.

So, a friend in DC is saying that there will be an announcement this evening with Trump mandating that all non grocery and/or pharmacies close for two weeks.

I'm calling bullshit as it would totally wreck the stock market along with the super panic it will cause.

So whats the over/under on him being right?

Bored As Fuck
Jan 1, 2006
Fun Shoe

ASAPI posted:

So, a friend in DC is saying that there will be an announcement this evening with Trump mandating that all non grocery and/or pharmacies close for two weeks.

I'm calling bullshit as it would totally wreck the stock market along with the super panic it will cause.

So whats the over/under on him being right?

Depends on who he works for.

BigDave
Jul 14, 2009

Taste the High Country

ASAPI posted:

So, a friend in DC is saying that there will be an announcement this evening with Trump mandating that all non grocery and/or pharmacies close for two weeks.

I'm calling bullshit as it would totally wreck the stock market along with the super panic it will cause.

So whats the over/under on him being right?

Wait EVERYTHING closes? Even generic office parks?

Flikken
Oct 23, 2009

10,363 snaps and not a playoff win to show for it

ASAPI posted:

So, a friend in DC is saying that there will be an announcement this evening with Trump mandating that all non grocery and/or pharmacies close for two weeks.

I'm calling bullshit as it would totally wreck the stock market along with the super panic it will cause.

So whats the over/under on him being right?


God I hope not, if they shut my industry down for two weeks it will grind the economy to a halt

Internet Wizard
Aug 9, 2009

BANDAIDS DON'T FIX BULLET HOLES

ASAPI posted:

So, a friend in DC is saying that there will be an announcement this evening with Trump mandating that all non grocery and/or pharmacies close for two weeks.

I'm calling bullshit as it would totally wreck the stock market along with the super panic it will cause.

So whats the over/under on him being right?

My uncle at Nintendo...

bloops
Dec 31, 2010

Thanks Ape Pussy!

ASAPI posted:

So, a friend in DC is saying that there will be an announcement this evening with Trump mandating that all non grocery and/or pharmacies close for two weeks.

I'm calling bullshit as it would totally wreck the stock market along with the super panic it will cause.

So whats the over/under on him being right?

I'm sure there are a lot of bullshit statements being floated around DC.

Casimir Radon
Aug 2, 2008


ASAPI posted:

So, a friend in DC is saying that there will be an announcement this evening with Trump mandating that all non grocery and/or pharmacies close for two weeks.

I'm calling bullshit as it would totally wreck the stock market along with the super panic it will cause.

So whats the over/under on him being right?
Well.......this is Donnie we're talking about and Donnie is that stupid. Could be true, could be bullshit, poo poo is going to be some degree of hosed up either way.

davecrazy
Nov 25, 2004

I'm an insufferable shitposter who does not deserve to root for such a good team. Also, this is what Matt Harvey thinks of me and my garbage posting.
Italy is on that type of lockdown.

There is still industry, but most consumer spaces are closed.

Cyks
Mar 17, 2008

The trenches of IT can scar a muppet for life
It is very likely Trump has or had the virus already and we would never know because he'll just sit in his room and tweet all day like every other day of his presidency.

I'm also confident that he'll never admit to getting sick.

facialimpediment
Feb 11, 2005

as the world turns
GODDAMNIT

https://twitter.com/johnrobertsFox/status/1238490114768191493?s=19

I think he both has and doesn't have the disease. It's the only explanation.

ASAPI
Apr 20, 2007
I invented the line.

ASAPI posted:

So, a friend in DC is saying that there will be an announcement this evening with Trump mandating that all non grocery and/or pharmacies close for two weeks.

I'm calling bullshit as it would totally wreck the stock market along with the super panic it will cause.

So whats the over/under on him being right?

So this is coming allegedly from someone in the State Dept. It's second hand though. Still not sure if they are dumb enough to do this...

joat mon
Oct 15, 2009

I am the master of my lamp;
I am the captain of my tub.

facialimpediment posted:

GODDAMNIT

https://twitter.com/johnrobertsFox/status/1238490114768191493?s=19

I think he both has and doesn't have the disease. It's the only explanation.

Covid entanglement.

facialimpediment
Feb 11, 2005

as the world turns

joat mon posted:

Covid entanglement.

https://twitter.com/ZekeJMiller/status/1238492090088206337?s=19

https://twitter.com/JesseRodriguez/status/1238492590917529600?s=19

It's like hey, someone's lying or very lucky :thunk:

bloops
Dec 31, 2010

Thanks Ape Pussy!

ASAPI posted:

So this is coming allegedly from someone in the State Dept. It's second hand though. Still not sure if they are dumb enough to do this...

Dont know if it's a dumb move in the pure interest of minimizing the spread of the disease.

Now if this includes airports then...well that's gonna be loving insane.

Best Friends
Nov 4, 2011

I've had a cough for a week and now my lungs are a little painful. But it's also completely normal for me to have coughs and painful lungs ever since I had basically untreated pneumonia all through boot camp, so this could just be a cold. Now my wife is also getting something, and her mother in law is here. I really really hope we don't have it so she doesn't get it.

boner penis
Oct 1, 2012

To Be is to get HYPHY
To Know is to go DUMB

MA-Horus posted:

Russians already have a cure for all diseases. It's a 9mm tokarev to the base of the skull.

MA-Horus posted:

It's a 9mm tokarev to the base of the skull.




REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Madurai
Jun 26, 2012


They can be both.

SimonCat
Aug 12, 2016

by Nyc_Tattoo
College Slice

boner penis posted:

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

All Soviet weapons can use NATO ammo.

Didn't you know that's why the AK is chambered in 7.62?

BurningChrome
Jan 18, 2020

They said she cooked her own cancers for people who crossed her, rococo custom variations that took years to kill you. They said a lot of things about Chrome, none of them at all reassuring.

Porfiriato posted:

Both Trump and Pence were at Mar a Lago with the Brazilian president and are apparently refusing to be tested. I wonder if they remember that should they both be incapacitated, the next person in the line of succession is... Nancy Pelosi.

Hahahhahahaha

facialimpediment
Feb 11, 2005

as the world turns
We interrupt this pandemic to bring you this Florida Man

https://twitter.com/BillyCorben/status/1238486471314526209?s=19

https://twitter.com/samstein/status/1238494974314000384?s=19

He was almost Governor!

MA-Horus
Dec 3, 2006

I'm sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of how awesome I am.

boner penis posted:

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

yeah i fixed it, give your balls a tug you titfucker.

EBB
Feb 15, 2005

SimonCat posted:

All Soviet weapons can use NATO ammo.

Didn't you know that's why the AK is chambered in 7.62?

bang bang BANG

Mr. Nice!
Oct 13, 2005

bone shaking.
soul baking.

Best Friends posted:

I've had a cough for a week and now my lungs are a little painful. But it's also completely normal for me to have coughs and painful lungs ever since I had basically untreated pneumonia all through boot camp, so this could just be a cold. Now my wife is also getting something, and her mother in law is here. I really really hope we don't have it so she doesn't get it.

The ER doc said symptoms to look for are a dry non-productive cough, difficulty breathing, fever, and body ache/fatigue. If you have all of those, reach out to your healthcare professional and follow their directions.

I would have gone to work and school this week but for the risk of COVID-19 spread. I feel mostly fine. I am only 35 and in pretty good shape, though. If I were 10-15 years older, I might be stuck in the hospital instead of sent home pending results.

Doc Hawkins
Jun 15, 2010

Dashing? But I'm not even moving!



yeah, i was going to say, if he did have it he would absolutely say he didn't

shame on an IGA
Apr 8, 2005

Louisiana postponing primaries. It begins.

Riot Carol Danvers
Jul 30, 2004

It's super dumb, but I can't stop myself. This is just kind of how I do things.

shame on an IGA posted:

Louisiana postponing primaries. It begins.

https://twitter.com/WAFB/status/1238493311876435969?s=19

Yeeee

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BurningChrome
Jan 18, 2020

They said she cooked her own cancers for people who crossed her, rococo custom variations that took years to kill you. They said a lot of things about Chrome, none of them at all reassuring.

shame on an IGA posted:

Louisiana postponing primaries. It begins.

ETA till fourth reich power grab?

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