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Josherino)
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I'm so scared for my Dad. He's in his 70s, and he's an incredible Bernie-voting sweetheart who takes care of my blind mom and makes time to call me and shoot the poo poo every day while we're in self-quarantine. He's taking the virus seriously and staying away from people, and I couldn't be more impressed. But I also know that being cooped up at home being a caregiver 24/7 makes him stir crazy, and he's eventually going to do something dumb like go out to eat. He's already making comments about having a family dinner with my wife and I. I don't think that's a good idea (who knows if I'm infected or not) but I'm probably gonna go along with it so he doesn't do something worse instead. He also stopped to help some strangers push their busted car today, and I know he's never going to stop doing stuff like that no matter what it exposes him to. If he gets sick, I'm going to have to stop everything and take care of my mom, because no one else will. She and I have a rocky relationship and it probably won't be healthy for either of us, but she's my mom. If he gets sick and dies, I'll be utterly devastated and simultaneously have to shoulder his responsibilities for who knows how long. Meanwhile, half the people on this loving website are just cheering for any and all boomers to die. Edit: I know I said I'd watch the coronavirus thread for all of us, but I think I need to step back from it before I start to really fall apart.  Maybe those of us who are worried about missing out on potential early warnings could rotate the burden? Idk.
Unsinkabear has issued a correction as of 04:20 on Mar 18, 2020 |
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Mar 18, 2020 03:53
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Unsinkabear posted:I'm so scared for my Dad. He's in his 70s, and he's an incredible Bernie-voting sweetheart who takes care of my blind mom and makes time to call me and shoot the poo poo every day while we're in self-quarantine. He's taking the virus seriously and staying away from people, and I couldn't be more impressed. But I also know that being cooped up at home being a caregiver 24/7 makes him stir crazy, and he's eventually going to do something dumb like go out to eat. He's already making comments about having a family dinner with my wife and I. I don't think that's a good idea (who knows if I'm infected or not) but I'm probably gonna go along with it so he doesn't do something worse instead. Just here to express support for you friend. These are scary times. There's only so much we can control. Try to find something small to regain a sense of control over, a small non-demanding task which is soothing.
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Mar 18, 2020 05:00
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Well I've just developed a dry cough so I guess I'll spend the next however many days panicking. hooray for current events.
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Mar 18, 2020 05:41
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edit: my bad
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Mar 18, 2020 08:23
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I just talked to my parents, and I feel like my only job in life right now is to take care of my mom. I don't care about myself, and I never have. But my mom doesn't deserve any of this, and I just want her to be safe and happy and die peacefully in her sleep.
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Mar 18, 2020 09:12
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I am sitting at home and I can concentrate even less at work than usual. I can't help but think I am working on an already terrible product that no one will want now that global aviation is collapsing. I alternate between an utter stillness at finally knowing I was right and utter horror at going "oh my god, I was RIGHT". This is the rest of my life. Watching everything collapse with no one by my side.
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Mar 18, 2020 12:58
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My girlfriend is a teacher, but she teaches part-time and isn't salaried - three days once a month, two days a week most, high school theater production and wardrobing. She also works theater tech for big shows and does part-time retail. The only job that is actually open is the retail (head shop) and she's going to be continuing to go in this weekend. I feel certain I'm going to catch it through her contact with the public but she can't not go to work because those couple hundred bucks could be hugely important without everything else. I live at home with my parents who are upper middle class and I don't really have to worry since my job is white collar and I've switched to telework (I earn less than $30k but at least I have some basic advantages in workflow and work at a university which is pretty flexible and considerate) but I'm fearful my parents will get sick, since they're in their 60s, even though they're both very healthy. I know its par for the course right now but I'm feeling tremendous fear, anxiety, and loathing for this devil nation and economy. I'm ready to burn through my savings to pay my girlfriend's rent if I have to because I love her and couldn't see her evicted but I'm worried I might lose my job as the university downturn in tuition becomes more and more pronounced. probably not this fiscal year but the next. my only hope is that I'm in admissions and specifically trained to do online programming admissions so I'm part of the infrastructure needed to revive the uni after things switch more and more to remote classes but everything feels hosed. also, my biggest fear is my medication. i'm on suboxone because i was a junkie until 2017. getting on suboxone allowed me to finish my MA and find a decent job, but my doctor comes in from an hour or two away twice a week, and I am really, really afraid they aren't going to be able to make it. suboxone can't be written remotely, can't give an extra scrip, can't write more than necessary, and I'm terrified I'm going to have to undertake a rapid taper. I could do it if I have to but the prospect has me scared as poo poo. I've been through withdrawals before but without any benzos or anything it's going to be incredibly rough. Ed: I called my rehab and they assured me theyre open for now and if forced to close the doctor can call in my sub scrip. I hope that turns out to be true Frog Act has issued a correction as of 14:49 on Mar 18, 2020 |
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Mar 18, 2020 14:08
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Well, I've got a sore throat, congestion, coughing and wheezing. I'm 90% sure it's unrelated to corona because I'm asthmatic and allergic to practically everything so I've got those symptoms every day anyway, plus I just recovered from a nasty sinus infection so there's some lingering discomfort from that, but man that 10% of uncertainty is wreaking havoc on my anxiety. Both of my kids, my wife, and my parents are all in the risk groups, I can't stop refreshing news about the virus, worrying about whether I'm contaminating my family, worrying about whether the dumbshits at work who aren't taking it seriously are spreading it, worrying about full societal collapse, all those fun things. We're pretty well stocked at home but the shelves being completely stripped everywhere is incredibly unnerving, plus my mom works retail and just told me that today's shipment to her store was outright canceled with no ETA so I'm kinda freaked out about how long it's going to take for distribution to catch back up with the (totally justified) panic buying, assuming we even find a way to deal with the virus and things ever return to normal-ish. On top of that, the anxiety medication I've been on for awhile is getting less and less effective. I talked to my doctor and tried switching it up a couple weeks ago but the new medicine gave me severe panic attacks and generally completely hosed up my mental state. Soo, back to the innefectual medication and the slow-burning "we are all going to die" existential dread, which is at least a little better than the fast-acting "I am actively dying right now" existential dread.
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Mar 18, 2020 14:51
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AceOfFlames posted:I am sitting at home and I can concentrate even less at work than usual. I can't help but think I am working on an already terrible product that no one will want now that global aviation is collapsing. I alternate between an utter stillness at finally knowing I was right and utter horror at going "oh my god, I was RIGHT". You have us friendo 
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Mar 18, 2020 19:06
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I'm starting to lose control over my OCD for the first time since middle school, which sucks because making the sign of the cross thrice is still ingrained in my lizard brain as a response to irrational fears and invasive thoughts. So now I'm like Dr. Strangelove trying to keep my hands off my face. I also have to stop myself from frantically scrubbing myself bloody when I start washing as I still have scars from that old tic. I really just need to stop reading C-SPAM and Twitter altogether. Even then I'll encounter mutual acquaintances who think COVID-19 is a socialist lie and I'll find myself momentarily convinced that I'm somehow responsible. I get lost in this idea that this world is either petulant nihilism or gleeful barbarism, though I can usually get myself under control by helping a local non-profit and focusing on literally anything else.
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Mar 18, 2020 20:38
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it is deeply, intensely satisfying to look at a cabinet stuffed full of food.Grammarchist posted:I'm starting to lose control over my OCD for the first time since middle school, which sucks because making the sign of the cross thrice is still ingrained in my lizard brain as a response to irrational fears and invasive thoughts. So now I'm like Dr. Strangelove trying to keep my hands off my face. I also have to stop myself from frantically scrubbing myself bloody when I start washing as I still have scars from that old tic. ocd loving sucks, i've had mine under control for a while, thankfully, but i hope yours doesn't come back too badly. pulling away from cspam/twitter altogether might not be a bad idea
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Mar 18, 2020 20:59
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i had been wavering between severe anxiety and tranquil disassociation as the pandemic started ramping up, but today I woke up feeling like a regular old depressed person just not wanting to face the day. almost feels good to be back to "normal." and I've felt better as the day has gone on. going to make some falafel tonight i think i was thinking of doing some volunteer work to help during the crisis but I'm not sure what the best way of doing that is.. anyone have any advice?
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Mar 18, 2020 21:00
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Sharkie posted:it is deeply, intensely satisfying to look at a stash stuffed full of weed
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Mar 18, 2020 21:00
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Pizza Segregationist posted:i had been wavering between severe anxiety and tranquil disassociation as the pandemic started ramping up, but today I woke up feeling like a regular old depressed person just not wanting to face the day. almost feels good to be back to "normal." and I've felt better as the day has gone on. going to make some falafel tonight i think All the food pantries/shelters in my area are still trying to figure out exactly what to do. Try giving one of them in your local area a call and asking what you can do to help. They might just ask for cash or supplies, or maybe something like helping deliver packaged meals to those in isolation. It might take some time, especially if the person answering the phone is waiting on a local board to make a call on what services to expand or suspend. One local library is having volunteers read children's books or host craft projects online so that kids and seniors who normally use that as a social space can still remain connected to something.
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Mar 18, 2020 21:16
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Just got my position terminated at a job ive been at for 5 years. gently caress this loving life
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Mar 18, 2020 22:33
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I think my mom is open to socialism. She went on long rant about too many billionaires, everyone's corrupt, etc., and agreed with me when I said we need new parties. It's nice, because I always thought she was a die-hard Democrat. She still thinks Obama was good because she doesn't know about his terrible policies, but one day at a time.
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Mar 18, 2020 22:57
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Remember the restorative power of music, goonfriends. Freezepop is the only thing keeping me going tonight. Go find the tunes that keep you afloat right now, and ride that wave as far as you can.Bullfrog posted:Just here to express support for you friend. These are scary times. There's only so much we can control. Try to find something small to regain a sense of control over, a small non-demanding task which is soothing. Thank you for this. I'm not sure what that small thing is for me right now, but I'll keep it in mind and do my best. Unsinkabear has issued a correction as of 02:24 on Mar 19, 2020 |
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Mar 19, 2020 02:14
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Mr Ice Cream Glove posted:Just got my position terminated at a job ive been at for 5 years. jesus. I'm sorry friend. I'm betting I'm right behind you, not that it'll make you feel any better
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Mar 19, 2020 05:45
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Does anybody else use ASMR vids to relax sometimes? I had a bit of a doom and gloom overdose looking at various things today so I went to my usual standbys of videos of someone flipping through library books. It's nice there are videos that cater to that; I used to think I was really creepy when I worked as a page at a library and would linger around shelves because someone was browsing and I liked the sounds too much. Nice to know there are enough other people who got that sensation that someone can make videos of it, and man it chills me right out. I tend to prefer videos that don't OVEREMPHASIZE. EVERY. drat. SOUND instead of just doing things normally but recorded.
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Mar 19, 2020 05:52
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i just listen to some of my chiller music during the night all the poo poo going on lately, plus some personal and family stuff has made me unable to focus on schoolwork, so i asked one teacher if i can get some extra time past the quarter to finish my final project. never had the courage, or need, to ask for help like that before, but i'm just burnt out from doing 18 months of school in a row after i got out of jail also my weekend job is shut down for a month+ due to virus, so rip that income. now to see if unemployment will help. it'll be nice to have weekends i guess, except nothing's going on
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Mar 19, 2020 06:39
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seriously concerned that when i (probably) dont get the stimulus because im disabled so my income isnt taxable, price gouging will gently caress me on basic goods ever since mom died on friday ive been busy and stressed af which is terrible for my immune system... at least im fairly isolated, but i have chronic bronchitis and am on immunosuppressants.
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Mar 19, 2020 09:12
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everyday I wake up motivated to get something done and within a couple minutes all I want to do is read about the ongoing collapse of America
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Mar 19, 2020 10:12
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Love to be unemployed and looking during the start of a depression and economic retraction.
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Mar 19, 2020 11:16
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I can't believe all my coworkers seem to be far more productive working at home while for me it's putting my procrastination into over drive. This will get me fired for sure.
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Mar 19, 2020 11:21
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AceOfFlames posted:I can't believe all my coworkers seem to be far more productive working at home while for me it's putting my procrastination into over drive. This will get me fired for sure. try putting yourself somewhere else in your domicile. even just at a different angle at your desk than you use for gaming. when I (rarely) have something I really need to focus on while working from home, I step away from my nerd gaming desktop setup and use my laptop to focus on it in another room. it can be hard to avoid just doing things you enjoy but you can habituate yourself to it pretty quickly. i've found a decent balance that allows me to log in and play video games while also taking care of my commitments but i have to be careful not to let it get out of hand. also, to the goons in this thread who lost their jobs, solidarity. unemployment sucks and our crushing hypercapitalist system is crumbling. i hope that things change fast enough to keep you all solvent.
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Mar 19, 2020 14:15
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err posted:Love to be unemployed and looking during the start of a depression and economic retraction. Yeah, isnt it great!!! 
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Mar 19, 2020 14:22
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Equeen posted:Yeah, isn’t it great!!! 
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Mar 19, 2020 14:54
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Really afraid I'm heading for a nervous breakdown. In Washington state, but still at work, and it's ridiculously busy. I'm taking a break to vent. Also I just bought a house, moved, moved my elderly parents, who now can't leave the house, and I can't get anything done at home, because I don't want to burn any vacation/sick time anymore because of virus fear. Also my mom keeps asking me to buy bleach and tortillas and paper towels, and I can't get through to her that that's not happening, because they all got horded two weeks ago.
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Mar 19, 2020 18:10
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Eat This Glob posted:jesus. I'm sorry friend. I'm betting I'm right behind you, not that it'll make you feel any better Thanks  they ended up terminating 8 people. My hope is my unemployment process goes through. Found out my college loan company is delaying payments for those affected by this. I am trying to stay grounded.
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Mar 19, 2020 18:32
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went from underemployed to unemployed for the time being. year out of college. the adults in my life are all hollering because theyre losing their investments i just cant help but feel that a soviet-style planned economy would be infinitely more just than this
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Mar 19, 2020 20:14
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I couldn't sleep at the best of times, as well documented in this thread, but now I'm up every night permanently after the first noise/need to pee/whatever. Being in Australia, all the crazy news happens overnight and I can't stop thinking about it when I should be sleeping. A realtor just congratulated me on my under-construction condo purchase being finalised. Yeah thanks dipshit, I'll never get to move in, lost my life savings and will never own property again. Edit: he probably contacted me to make sure I'm not dead since I haven't signed the final papers. Lawyer said it's too late to back out though. Edit 2: will Australia just shut down loving gyms already so I can sleep in my apartment? If I wasn't ratfucked by a corrupt landlord who locked me into a place I couldn't sleep in I wouldn't have rushed into the housing market when I did. Which has now destroyed everything. UnfortunateSexFart has issued a correction as of 21:06 on Mar 19, 2020 |
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Mar 19, 2020 20:59
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Who knew that the government telling me that I can't socialize would actually make me want to Hope there's still a world worth enjoying at the end of this
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Mar 20, 2020 05:01
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err posted:Love to be unemployed and looking during the start of a depression and economic retraction.
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Mar 20, 2020 06:22
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hey my wife is worried about me and I don't know what to do the idea of talking to a therapist right now seems impossible with societal lockdowns and whatnot (not to mention the fact that anyone you talk to is simultaneously experiencing the same existential terror as you). what's a good way to stop being a terrible person because my only solution is beer and weed and that's expensive and bad for me
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Mar 20, 2020 08:24
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poo poo POST MALONE posted:hey my wife is worried about me and I don't know what to do 1. They'll all do video calls and although not as helpful as in-person it can really, really help. 2. They are scared too but probably in a very different place mentally than the average person. All the ones I know are working and doing a pretty loving good job too. 3. Start watching DS9.
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Mar 20, 2020 08:55
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also if you cut the beer you might feel better in general and feel less bad about the weed, which will enhance your deep space nine experience.
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Mar 20, 2020 13:28
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I'm feeling utterly confused today. Not panicked, quite calm actually. But confused. On one hand, people here are treating this as the literal end of the world. On the other all my coworkers are being productive (with the occasional "not sure if this is supposed to be a joke" discussion on whether to buy baby food to act as a stash) even though we work in an aviation adjacent company that is sure to tank (I live in the Netherlands, BTW). My parents and my brother also all put me on blast about my "relentless pessimism" and about how I "just want to make myself a victim". I am avoiding the news and C-SPAM threads much more than usual since it will only bring me down. So who is right? What IS going to happen? Do I just live my life, try my best and try to take things one day at a time? I don't know what else I can do. Is this was normal people do? Am I setting myself up for disaster??
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Mar 20, 2020 13:29
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AceOfFlames posted:Do I just live my life, try my best and try to take things one day at a time? I don't know what else I can do. Is this was normal people do? Am I setting myself up for disaster?? This is what people on SA have been telling you to do at least once a month for years now, yes.
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Mar 20, 2020 13:47
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AceOfFlames posted:I'm feeling utterly confused today. Not panicked, quite calm actually. But confused. I don't think relentless pessimism, whether that's what you're doing or not, is entirely unwarranted in this situation, all things considered, but it absolutely is unproductive. You answered your question yourself, though. There isn't anything else you can really do other than live your life one day at a time, in a way to make things better for who you can around you. There's some deep powerlessness there that you kinda have to accept, but that's just kind of a thing that's there all the time. It's not really good or bad, just an acknowledgement that the world is big and you won't be able to fix everything, even everything that directly involves you, let alone the world. Use your calm as you can. Your fears aren't unreasonable, but as long as you're not like actively licking doorknobs and aiming snot rockets in passing cars, you're not making things worse. Your family's attitude kind of garbage, yes, but all you can do about that is talk to them, as someone who is in their lives and has a relationship with them. Let them calm you down a bit, rather than it making you angry--after all, the world is still going on, one way or another. Maybe you can convince them to at least take things a bit more seriously in exchange. If not, enh. Keep doing what you can. Make someone's day a little happier if the opportunity comes up, and let yourself take a few more relaxing showers, walks, naps, whatever. It's not easy, but it's something you can get past.
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Mar 20, 2020 13:49
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poo poo POST MALONE posted:the idea of talking to a therapist right now seems impossible... (not to mention the fact that anyone you talk to is simultaneously experiencing the same existential terror as you). I had this discussion with my therapist for the first time this week. She was very clear that I should still seek help in dealing with that terror. The fact that everyone is feeling it doesn't disqualify you from getting help for it. And just because everyone, including therapists, is struggling with it doesn't mean that they can't help you.
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Mar 20, 2020 14:18
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